The Vessel
by White Ink Penpal
Summary: I started out as a girl without memories in a foreign land, and life took a turn for the worse after that. Sakura-centric.
1. Prologue: Fall

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Normal talk."

_"Japanese."_

_"**Jutsu.**"_

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything from both SnK and Naruto. I do own the plot, however. I also do not own the image but credit to the anime.**

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><p>The first thing she remembered was falling.<p>

Her body ached, especially her stomach, and she could tell that her shoulder was dislocated and her ankle was sprained. How did she know this? Oh, she was a medical ninja, yes, that's why. Her arms shook in restrained pain, and there was a dull throb in the back of her head that, although not life threatening, was incredibly uncomfortable to the point of eliciting a groan.

The ground was soft, and she could feel both the sun beating on the parts of her body not covered by a shade. She blearily opened her eyes and observed the thick trees with mild fascination. They reminded her of something, _somewhere_, but she couldn't exactly remember what exactly. The lack of knowledge irked her, but at the same time she had other things to worry about at the moment.

She carefully got up, hoping not to make her injuries worse. She knew any normal person would have been rendered useless from such pain, but she managed to handle it just fine. Some would say mind over matter but... Yes, she had a high tolerance for pain because she was a medical kunoichi.

Ah, there it was. She was a kunoichi, sworn to defend...

She frowned. Her memories seemed to stop there, or at least that was all she could retrieve at the moment. Her name, though...

Her name was Sakura, though she couldn't quite remember her last name, even after she went through different words in her mind; none of them sounded familiar.

The kunoichi frowned momentarily, but then shrugged, or at least attempted to before the pain made her grimace. Well, it was nigh time to try to heal these injuries anyway.

She placed her hands over her ribs and let her subconscious lead her movements, since she didn't quite remember how to use medical ninjutsu to begin with. The familiar green light relaxed her and alleviated her body, but she panicked when the light faded almost immediately. Her body suddenly felt very heavy again, and she cursed herself for not realizing her chakra exhaustion first and foremost.

It's not that she didn't recognize it... More that she forgot how it felt...

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><p>The next time she woke up she was in a much softer place, possibly a bed. She felt the pressure of bandages in her ribs and ankle, the dull ache of her rather well-set shoulder, and the wetness of a cloth on her forehead. Sakura opened her eyes and wasn't surprised to see a wooden roof. The light seeping through the small window in her room gave the impression of mid-morning, maybe around nine, which meant that she had passed out for at least a day. That was a sound judgement considering her chakra reserves had improved from the day before.<p>

She gingerly got up, making sure not to agitate her wounds any further. After double-checking her reserves to not make yesterday's blunder, she placed her hands over her ribs and felt the cooling of her chakra mending her broken bones. After a couple of minutes the tightness in her chest dissipated completely and she could breathe easily once again. She wanted to carry on to finish the job with her shoulder and ankle, but she was still not in her full strength and didn't want to cause another chakra exhaustion.

Sakura sat at the edge of the bed and warily observed her surroundings. Her bed was at the far side of the room, with a night stand next to it with a lamp that seemed to burn on oil. Her whole room was made out of wood, which was slightly dangerous if her lamp really did burn oil. Other than the bed and nightstand, the room was devoid of any furniture.

Her sensitive ears heard slow, light tread in the other side of the house. The house must've been small, because maybe even without her chakra-enhanced hearing she might've heard the footsteps of this home's inhabitant. The frailty behind the movement was weak, which meant that if need be, Sakura could quickly eliminate the threat and be on her way. Though the ruthlessness behind her thoughts surprised a small part of her mind, a larger part of her psyche was more focused on keeping her alive.

She got up and made her way to the door, making sure to slowly push it open so as to not attract any attention. A small woman with gray hair was washing her dishes in the sink, though she got the water from a bucket. The sight shouldn't have surprised her, but for some reason she found it odd. There must've been an easier way to get water... right?

"Hello?"

The old woman dropped a dish and whirled around, staring at her with wide brown eyes. Her face was wrinkled and not well treated, and her yellow shirt and beige skirt were dull from use. Speaking of which, the woman must've changed her out of her ninja clothes and lent her the white shirt and black skirt she was wearing. Though the airiness was comfortable, she preferred her pants.

"I... I just wanted to thank you for helping me with my injuries. I could have died out there so for that... Is there something wrong?"

The woman just stared at her, and her mouth opened slightly.

Sakura looked around, trying to find the source of her astonishment, but she found none. She turned back to the woman and cleared her throat awkwardly. "Um, is there something in my face?"

The woman opened her mouth, and Sakura wanted to whimper when she heard what the woman said.

She didn't understand a single word.

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><p><em>All that I knew was that my name was Sakura, and that I could heal and fight.<em>

_I didn't know where I came from, whom I was supposed to protect, or where I was._

_The moment she spoke in a language I couldn't understand was the moment I truly broke._

_Because that was when I realized I was alone, and no one would recognize me._

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><p>The first week was a bit awkward for both Sakura and Helsa. Most of their communication resembled a crude game of charades, if they even managed to get their point across. What Sakura did manage to convey with growing proficiency was her hunger and thirst, which Helsa regarded with open amusement. Though she didn't understand where she was or how she got there, Sakura detested the idea of being a free loader and helped Helsa with whatever she could, especially the more physical chores.<p>

They lived around thirty minutes from the nearest town, near the woods where Helsa had found an unconscious Sakura. Helsa had taken her there three days after her arrival, and although she couldn't understand a word that anyone said, Sakura knew she was asking around to see if anyone knew her. Sakura knew she was pretty unforgettable; her pink hair and bright green eyes made her almost impossible to forget or not recognize.

However, Helsa's attempts were always met with a shake of the head.

It was in the first week that Sakura's depression set in. It was not that she missed anyone, because she realized that her amnesia had taken a new form and she couldn't remember absolutely anybody other than herself, and even that was a rather blurry. What caused her to sink in the depths of despair was her loneliness. Not only was she unable to communicate with anyone, but she quickly found out she was the only one with the ability to manipulate chakra, making her somewhat of an anomaly in this world. Even gentle Helsa became a bit wary the first time Sakura lifted a table with ease. Soon after that she quickly learned to gauge Helsa's strength and mimicked a slightly enhanced version of hers to appear more normal, but she knew Helsa wasn't going to forget.

So here she was, lonely and a freak. Maybe it was a small blessing to have amnesia, because she knew she wouldn't be able to cope with the homesickness.

However, what started as an uncomfortable relationship soon became a relaxing companionship in a matter of weeks. Sakura's worries of being kicked out of Helsa's home faded once she realized the old woman liked having her around, even if she wasn't that great of a conversation partner. Her fears were completely squashed when Helsa brought a notebook and pencil one day and beckoned Sakura to sit down on their small table. She drew pictures and wrote next to them in a foreign alphabet, sounding them out and pointing at her artwork.

Nouns were the easiest for her to learn, but verbs proved to be tricky. Helsa tried her best to draw them and explain what was going on, but Sakura was having problems conveying her sentences, and her attempts usually ended with sheepish smiles and toothless laughs.

"The girl run forest?" Sakura asked in broken German.

Helsa shook her head and said, "Wrong verb."

"_This is all so_ _frustrating_," Sakura muttered in her native tongue. Both women sat there, staring at the notebook as if it had the answers to their problems. And in hindsight, the notebook had been the answer to her problems before, but now they were starting to understand the limitations the notebook brought. There was no way Sakura could become proficient in a language with just that.   
><span>

The woman stood up and slid her chair back in. "Come... going to market." Though Sakura had problems conveying her thoughts, she was picking up on what Helsa said with ease, at least when she used simple verbs like "going to" and overused nouns like "market."

Sakura readied the basket meanwhile Helsa went for her money in her room. She had been curious as to what Helsa did for a living, considering she didn't have a husband or son that could work the fields. A couple of days after their meeting Sakura had seen her sewing her pants and long-sleeved shirt, and she realized that her savior had a knack for sewing. In fact, she later deduced that the worn clothes they had were her own creations, which were quiet popular in Beinn, the town they frequented.

The walk there was peaceful, as it always was. Sakura found trees to be strangely relaxing and familiar, though the reason was a mystery considering her memories were inaccessible. She had tried to communicate that to Helsa to see if she had any recommendations, but she didn't know how to _show _amnesia. She settled for saying "forgot my life," which elicited a sad look from Helsa, a reply she couldn't understand, and a quiet dinner.

Sakura hadn't brought the topic again.

Beinn's commercial district was bustling with activity, with horses moving carts filled with goods and people bartering for food and produce in stalls on the streets. Even though people already knew of Sakura's existence, she still managed to turn a few heads towards her, and it always made her blush under the pressure of the stares.

They approached a stall that sold Sakura's favorite potatoes, but instead of the usual blond seller, there was a woman with long black hair and happy dark eyes. Helsa seemed rather content about this, because they started chatting animatedly to the point that Sakura easily lost track of the conversation. She knew that the topic was about their lives, at least until Helsa said her name.

"...Sakura––"

"Sakura?" the black haired woman repeated, confused.

Helsa nodded and started explaining their meeting, if the words "forest," "hurt," and "living" were of any indication. The black haired woman was very interested in her, though, to the point that Sakura became uncomfortable and started browsing the potatoes to see which ones they would take.

"_Do you understand what I am saying?" _the woman asked in Japanese.

Sakura whipped her head up and stared at her with wide eyes. Yes, there was a very noticeable accent, but her sentence structure and delivery were almost flawless. "_I do... How do you know what I am__ saying?"_  
><span>

Her answer seemed to please her greatly, because she smiled widely, showing her slightly yellow teeth. "_My grandparents came from a land far away where they spoke this language, however it seems I am the last one that does. Your name is very beautiful, Sakura-san; even though I never saw them, that was all my grandmother ever talked about."_  
><span>

She bowed slightly in respect and acceptance of her compliment. "_Thank you very much... Well, this is rude of me, but what is your name?"_

The woman blinked and laughed nervously. "_Oh, if my grandmother heard me she would be very disappointed of me. My name is Mikoto Ackerman, though I guess you would say it Ackerman Mikoto."_

_"It is a pleasure to meet you, Ackerman-san."_

Mikoto turned to talk to Helsa for a couple of minutes. Since Sakura couldn't quite follow the conversation very well, she settled for observing her expressions. The Japanese woman was visibly ecstatic, but there was a wariness behind Helsa's eyes that disappeared the more Mikoto talked. Eventually Helsa agreed to whatever Mikoto was proposing, which made her grin in happiness.

"_Ah, Sakura-san, what would you say if you came to my house every day to learn our language? Helsa tells me that she reached the end of what she can teach you, but there is still much for you to learn."_

The pink-haired girl blinked in wonder, but then she smiled widely and nodded enthusiastically to both Mikoto and Helsa. "_That would be wonderful! I would love to be able to have a conversation with Helsa without trying to guess what we're saying."_

Mikoto laughed and translated what Sakura said for Helsa to enjoy. She grinned, showing her lack of teeth, and nodded along with her statement. Sakura couldn't help but feel a bout of warmth for the woman right then, considering that she knew her hesitance was not for her fear of Sakura being distracted, but of trusting someone else with the well-being of her housemate.

However, Sakura knew that somewhere in Helsa's mind she was remembering her freakish strength and that must've assuaged her doubts.

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><p><em>Even though I didn't have precious people to protect, I could see myself wanting to protect Helsa, the woman who nursed and trusted a stranger with the remnants of her youth.<em>

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><p><em>Six Months Later<em>

_ October 8th, 842_

"Mikasa, can you bring the plates please?"

Sakura saw her trip before she started falling and quickly took the plates and righted the younger girl with her other hand. Mikasa stared at her with wide gray eyes, astonished at her ability and swiftness, but Sakura just winked at her and placed an index finger in front of her mouth playfully. The girl nodded gravely and mimicked her gesture, the action so somber that it made her giggle.

"_What are you two up to?" _Mikoto asked, her voice light and amused.

"_Nothing,"_ they replied in unison and giggled together.

"Help, Ackerman-san?" Sakura asked, eyeing the heavy laundry in Mikoto's arms. Though her speech was still heavily-accented, she could now quickly form sentences in her head with simple verbs, something Mikoto was pleasantly impressed about, considering her limited training. Sakura deduced she must've been someone smart prior to losing her memory, something that made her chest swell with pride.

"Oh, no, don't worry, Sakura. I heard that Erick needed help in the fields. Help there?"

Sakura agreed wordlessly, quickly heading out to their fields and spotting Mr. Ackerman working with his prized potatoes. Though Sakura had kept her powers as a kunoichi hidden for the sake of fitting in, both the Ackermans and Helsa knew about her freakish strength, and they didn't hesitate to request her help. She didn't mind, though; the times were rough and they could use every able-bodied person at their disposal. In fact, it made Sakura happy to know she could be of any use to them.

Erick Ackerman had started out as a very quiet, reserved man, but he had soon warmed to his wife's pupil and showed his kind, happy personality that he only seemed to have around Mikasa and Mikoto. He had showed her how to plough a field as well as check the overall health of the crops, which was quite the feat considering the lack of available communication.

Both of them lost track of time, too engrossed in their work, and only realized the sun would soon set when Mikoto calmed them back. Sakura wiped her brow and walked inside, already thinking about the excuse she would have to give Helsa for her tardiness. Though she had only been with her for half a year, Helsa considered Sakura like a granddaughter and protected her as such. She had confided to her that she had lost both her husband and son to the titans, tall humanoid creatures that inhabited this world and preyed on humans. It had apparently been an accident, because they belonged to the military division that was less involved in combat, the Garrison, but it had happened and so here she was, a widow and childless.

The worst part was that she was barely forty but she looked old enough to be a grandmother.

"Oh, Sakura, are you going to have dinner?"

She shook her head and chuckled nervously. "Helsa must be mad. I am... ah... after hour? _Late?_"

"Late," Mikoto supplied gently.

"Yes, I am late."

Mikasa placed two plates on opposing chairs and Erick soon followed, placing another pair. They all looked at each other and grinned at Sakura. "Well, there's four plates set, so I guess it would be a shame to waste so much food, right?" Erick, though kind, was quite sneaky and knew how to get what he wanted.

Sakura sighed but she didn't restrain the smile that blossomed in her face. She had been a bit nervous that there was the possibility that she would never get her memories back, but being surrounded by such wonderful people eased those worries and she soon realized that she didn't miss those memories, because she had Helsa and Mikoto and Mikasa and Erick to make new memories with.

Dinner was particularly eventful as Mikasa related her encounter with the laws of nature right on her gardens. The strong dominated the weak... It was both an inter and intra-species law, applied mercilessly and almost without fail. That Mikasa had noticed it at such early age was testament of her heightened perception and intelligence.

She would make a suitable pupil when she grew a bit older. Perhaps Mikoto or Erick would let her teach Mikasa a bit of taijutsu later on? Well, first she had to go over the movements herself, of course. Even though she innately remembered what she was supposed to do, just like breathing, Sakura didn't think she was ready to pass on the knowledge just yet.

After cleaning the dirty dishes, Sakura bid her farewell. The sky was already dark, and she knew Helsa would probably choke her a little tonight, but Sakura was feeling happy and satisfied with the turn her life had taken so she was more than ready to take whatever punishment Helsa deemed necessary.

Sakura looked around and, after making sure there was no one in the vicinity, walked on the trees by coating the bottom of her feet with chakra. Soon she was jumping effortlessly from tree to tree, barely making the branches tilt under her weight. If someone was around to see it, he would've thought she was flying. This exercise was something Sakura could seldom do, considering that it had to be night and she had to be alone for her to do it, since nobody seemed able to use chakra or was even aware that jumping such long distances was possible. Sakura had even questioned Mikoto about the uses of chakra in her history and she had only given her a blank stare before asking what chakra was.

There was a very high possibility that she was the only one able to use chakra in this world, which meant that either her people were secretive and reclusive or... less likely, she wasn't from this world. But that was impossible, right? How would that be even possible after all? Out of the two choices, it was much more likely and preferable if her people, the shinobi and kunoichi, were secretive like their profession. After all, that's what they were supposed to be and do, after all. What kind of shinobi would–

Sakura skidded to a stop when she saw smoke rising from the woods in the general direction her home was. She sped up, her body almost a mirage as she ran faster than she had ever run before. The apprehension and anxiousness in her gut worsened when she saw the eager fire rising, rolling in the rooftops of their home by the wind. She immediately barged in their small wooden house, quickly locating Helsa because she was the only chakra signature in the house, however frail and fleeting.

She crouched in front of her and gathered her in her arms, lifting her as if she were weightless. "Sakura...?" Helsa murmured, before coughing harshly, throwing specks of blood in Sakura's face. With growing horror she stared at the blood dripping from Helsa's stomach, coating her fingers in red.

As much as the curiosity was killing her, she needed to get out of the burning house before they caught on fire or asphyxiated. However, there was no way any normal human could logically flee the house, so Sakura had to throw all caution to the wind and use her power as a kunoichi to get them both out of there alive. With her chakra-enhanced eyesight she picked the areas were the fire was the weakest and jumped over them. Sakura could've sworn she should've burned her legs, but instead felt the fire caress her. That was something she would have to think about later on.

Once she was far away enough of the fire, she gently set Helsa down on the grass floor. Even though she wanted to heal her as fast as she could, she needed to find a way to put the fire down before it spread to the forest and burned everything in its path. But how exactly could she do that? The only things she remembered were those innate to her person, like her chakra-enhanced strength, agility, and senses. Then again, she could do medical ninjutsu, so maybe she could to other kinds of ninjutsu?

The wind was carrying sparks of the fire further and further. The sight would've been devastatingly beautiful had Sakura not been so emotionally involved with the burning of her first home. She didn't even notice her hands making the seals until she muttered, "**_Suiton: Bakusui Shoha,_**_"_ and her mouth released a wave of water that crashed down on their home and quickly overwhelmed the flames.

Even though it had felt natural to use that ninjutsu, the amount of chakra it consumed left her winded and exhausted. She was sure out of shape to be rendered so useless after just one jutsu, which meant that she should invest in training both her mind and body more often after this.

Once she was sure the fire was fully extinguished, Sakura headed back towards Helsa with a powerful jump. She landed roughly beside her, but she was too preoccupied trying to stop the bleeding to mind that much.

"Fine," she choked. "You'll be fine, Helsa. _I promise you'll be okay, I'll promise I'll save you. I promise I won't lose you."_

Helsa placed a gentle hand above her hands after noticing the healing light was flickering out of existence. "It is okay, Sakura. I am old, and there are people I want to see on the other side... Thank you for making the last months of my life... Ah, you don't know that word. I guess happy will suffice. You are full of surprises."

"Who did this?" she asked, her voice mixed with sobs and rage as she stopped the healing ninjutsu before she became exhausted.

Helsa shook her head sadly and squeezed her fingers. "They are gone, but they don't matter, dear Sakura. Love is better motivation than hate and revenge... Remember that, because when I did it was far too late."

"I'm so sorry," Sakura muttered, holding back another cry. "_If I hadn't stopped training, if I had come home earlier, if I weren't so weak..." _Sakura stared at Helsa's unseeing eyes, knowing that she hadn't heard a word of her apology. "... _You would be alive."_

Sakura retrieved her hands from her abdomen and stared from her bloodied hands back to the open wound in her stomach, which was still bleeding freely. Someone had broken into _their _home and attacked her precious person. Though she had no idea why anyone would prey on an old woman like Helsa, the end result was still the same.

"I'm sorry," she whispered to her corpse.

But this time she didn't mean it.

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><p>She waited for half an hour besides her body, allowing her hot rage to cool down to cold bloodlust. Once she was ready, she picked Helsa's body up and ran to the ashes of their house, placing her gently there until she found a suitable burial spot.<p>

Right now, though, she needed to find the people that took away her precious person.

Sakura didn't have much experience with tracking, and the only experience she had been counting on was the one she had forgotten. However, she was determined to not rest until she found them. Even though she had given them a thirty minute head start, she could cover that distance in less than ten minutes, so she had the advantage there.

The trick was locating their chakra, and locating chakra in the middle of a forest usually devoid of people at this time shouldn't be too hard.

And indeed, it hadn't been hard, at all. After fifteen minutes of aimlessly jumping from branch to branch she felt four chakra signatures walking leisurely away from her location, around five minutes away. She headed that way and quickly caught up to them. Once she was in their hearing range, she muffled her footsteps with chakra and came close enough to hear their conversation. She had to make sure they were the murderers, but she also wanted to know why they set their house on fire and stabbed Helsa.

"... did we get?"

"Hn, almost nothing. Bitch was empty."

Her jaw clenched, and she held back her punch.

"That was not the point," a new voice pitched in. "Fear... We want the farmlands to fear us."

"Word... people will know. Then we get money. Then... rich."

Sakura cursed her inability to speak more fluently, but by now she had a rough idea of what they were trying to say. Helsa had been the first (or at least she thought she was the first) of a series of attacks preying on the people far away from congregated human settlements. Despicable actions which led to extortion, but to get there they needed to build a reputation, and the only way to become infamous was by causing more crimes like the ones that happened today.

That was all she needed to hear.

She readied her fist with chakra and leapt down from her tree branch to land silently besides the outermost male of the band. Without leaving them a chance to notice her, she punched him squarely in the jaw, the power behind her fist so great that she ripped his head out of his neck and sent it flying to a nearby trunk. Blood sprayed from his neck, streams of blood dirtying her face and hair and the new white shirt Helsa had gifted her two days ago.

The thugs jumped and yelled in surprise, but Sakura didn't give them time to recover as she uppercutted the next man, sending his head flying to the treetops. By now Sakura was starting to enjoy the noise of cracking bones and ripped skin, and looked forward to hearing what sounds the other two murderers would make.

By now the other two were prepared, if the glint of their knives in the moonlight was of any indication. However, they were at a disadvantage since Sakura could see much better than them and she had superior reflexes. Both of them charged at her at the same time, but Sakura quickly jumped out of the way, getting behind them and punching them in the chest at the same time, feeling giddy when she heard their spinal cords snapping beneath her fists. They crumpled to the floor like puppets being cut from their strings.

In the midst of her adrenaline rush Sakura had not realized how heavily she was breathing. If there had been another shinobi around she would've been dead already. Had she been a pitiful excuse of a kunoichi in her homeland?

She started becoming more aware of the blood on her face and clothes and started cleaning her face with her stained hands, though she was surprised when she felt something cooler making its way down her cheeks.

Huh, so she had been crying all this time.

What a pitiful excuse of a kunoichi she really was.

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><p>Mikoto was the first one to hear the soft knocks on the door. She turned around to look at her husband, who was peacefully asleep after a day of tolling in the fields. Harvest day was getting closer, so she knew Erick always gave it a little bit more these days. With that thought in mind, she made her way to open the door to give Erick some more time, noting as she passed the kitchen that it was barely sunrise.<p>

She closed her eyes in annoyance and opened the door. "I hope you know..." She gaped at Sakura, who was drenched in blood and staring at her with empty bloodshot eyes.

"I... I... _I didn't know where else to go," _she whispered.

She sounded so pitiful, so alone, so broken, that Mikoto decided to forget she was drenched in _blood _and gave her a bone-crushing hug. She stroked her hair, which was more red than pink right now, as she sobbed into her shoulder.

"I promise I... _I gave her a good burial."_

"_Shh, shh, I know you did, I know you did. I know you honored your grandmother."_

Sakura only cried harder.

* * *

><p><em>It was then that I realized that even people without a past can feel pain.<em>

_It was then that I realized that a kunoichi could lose to death._

_It left a bitter taste in my mouth._

_A taste I would experience many more times later on._

* * *

><p><strong>Jutsu used:<strong>

**Water Release: Exploding Water Colliding Wave**

**Okay, so just to clear things up, the Naruto universe I will be using will be AU, which means that this Sakura will be AU too. That is all I will reveal for now. And yes, that AU universe will play a big role in this story, but much later on. As for Sakura's amnesia, I researched retrograde amnesia as much as I could but I had to take creative liberties to fit the story. I promise it will make sense as the plot develops.**

**Speaking of plot, this story is currently a side-project so depending on the response I receive I will put it on as a main project and start developing plot intensively or I'll just write when my muse dictates and I'm not feeling lazy.**

**Also, I wanted to try my hand at romance since I'm relatively new at that, so I'll leave the pairing up to the readers. Please keep in mind that Sakura is currently 17 so by the time the manga storyline begins she will be 24~25.**

**Reviews are love.**

**Penpal**


	2. Resolve

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"**Emphasis.**"_

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><p>Dinner that night was a tense and quiet affair. Sakura had explained a very edited version of the events, saying that Helsa had accidentally dropped her lamp and that had consequently set the whole house on fire in a matter of seconds. Sakura got there just in time to retrieve her from the building, but she had sustained a heavy injury from a fallen piece of wood that had impaled her abdomen, killing her a few minutes later from blood loss.<p>

She had gone through great lengths to hide the bodies of the bandits, looking for any missing appendages and then burying all of their remains very deep in the earth. She knew no one was going to miss them, considering they were relatively unknown and the only one that knew about their crime had assassinated them not even an hour later, but she still had to make sure nobody would accidentally come across their corpses, especially the decapitated ones. That would just raise unnecessary questions.

It had been a good thing that the Ackermans trusted Sakura's word. It's not that she feared their retribution, because she was sure they would say the thugs deserved what they got in a twisted way. No, she feared _their _fear. She didn't want visit their house and have them be on the edge, wandering if she was going to snap at them if they so much as playfully insulted her. She didn't want them to think of her as a cold-blooded murderer no better than the ones she had killed. She had snapped, yes, but that was because of grief and rage, not because she was a psychopath who relished in going on killing sprees.

Or had she been like that? Is that why she had found it so easy to end someone else's life, because she had done it before and felt no remorse?

The Ackermans were the only people capable of accepting her in her current state, so if she had to hide a part of her to be accepted then so be it.

Mikasa had been understandably quiet throughout the whole dinner. Though the kunoichi felt numb inside, she was still perceptive enough to notice Mikasa's determined gaze whenever they locked stares.

"Mom, can Sakura stay here, with us?"

Sakura was about to swallow her stew when she choked, coughing harshly from the surprise. Mikoto patted her on the back gently, and after a couple of gulps of water she regained her composure, much to her embarrassment.

"Now, Mikasa––" Mikoto started off gently.

However, the seven-year-old was not easily dissuaded. "She can stay in my room. She can have my bed and I can sleep in the floor, too."

"Mikasa," Sakura murmured gently, "you don't have to do that. It's okay. I can––"

"It's a big responsibility to have a roomate," Erick interrupted with an amused smile. He patted his daughter on the head. "Think you can handle it?"

Mikasa nodded eagerly, puffing out her cheeks. "I'll do it for Sakura!"

Sakura put her spoon down next to her bowl and stared helplessly at each of them, feeling her dread grow at their looks of compassion. "I... I don't know how to say––"

"Then don't." Mikoto's eyes hardened a bit and she placed her hand on top of Sakura's squeezing gently. "_I don't know what image you have of yourself, but you have been a wonderful addition to our family. It would be our greatest honor if you accepted a place in the Ackerman household. _Will you, Sakura?"

She grit her teeth and closed her eyes tightly, hoping to keep the tears at bay. Here she was, a monster, and the Ackermans were inviting her to live like one of them. She should have refused, she should have been selfless and thought about their well-being above her own, but she was selfish and, although the guilt was eating her alive, she felt elated that the Ackermans thought of her as family.

"_I humbly accept."_

Dinner that night became a relaxed and somber affair.

"Oh, Mikasa, don't worry: we'll get you a new bed."

* * *

><p><em>December 25, 842<em>

"_Um, Mikasa, do you need any help with that_?"

The dark-haired girl stared at her surrogate sister, slightly confused. "What do you mean?"

Sakura pointed at the logs she was carrying with a tip of her head. True, Sakura was carrying five times the amount, but she had the strength of ten men. She couldn't hide her freakish strength from the Ackermans, anyway. Mikasa, however, was a seven-year-old who was carrying fifteen pounds worth of wood in her arms and she didn't even bat an eyelash.

"_They're not heavy?"_

"No." She lifted the logs a bit higher, as if to prove a point. "Mom says I have to be strong so I am."

"_How strong do you want to be?"_

"Is that Japanese I'm hearing from you, Sakura? And why aren't you practicing your Japanese, Mikasa?"

Sakura cringed and hesitated to look ahead, knowing that Mikoto would be glaring quite openly at her. The pair of adopted sisters had an unspoken agreement to speak in the language they felt most comfortable in whenever Mikoto was out of an earshot. She had stressed to Sakura the importance of continuously practicing the language, but she had grown complacent with speaking Japanese to the younger girl, especially because Mikasa understood everything she said with ease. And Mikasa felt no interest in keeping her ancestor's tongue alive, seeing as it would be useless in a few years.

"Um... Sorry?"

Mikoto wasn't placated, though. She whacked both of them in the back of the head, making Mikasa yelp in pain and Sakura whimper in surprise.

"I expected a better excuse from you, Sakura Ackerman. Now, hurry along; those logs need to last us a couple of days and tonight."

Both girls shifted the logs slightly in their hands, the gloves protecting them from the splinters of the wood.

It had been awkward the first time the Ackermans had acknowledged her as part of the family by attaching their last name to hers. Erick had done it first, and the room had become so quiet and uncomfortable that none of them had brought it up for two weeks. The underlying tension of acceptance had immediately vanished once she introduced herself as Sakura Ackerman to one of Erick's potential costumers, unknowingly causing him to grin in happiness.

Ever since then the name had just... fit.

"_I don't want to be strong," _she whispered in response to her last question. "_I don't want to fight. I... don't want to hurt anyone."_

Sakura smiled sadly and opened the door for both of them, balancing the majority of the logs with one arm. Once inside they put the wood next to the fireplace, though Sakura stayed behind to make a new fire.

"You don't hurt people with your strength. You protect them."

"Protect?"

The fire flickered to life after a few attempts to make sparks. The room immediately felt ten degrees warmer, which was still not enough to make her feel comfortable with the weather. Apparently this winter was better than the last two years', but she still couldn't stop shivering for more than three minutes.

"Mhm," she hummed in agreement. "But you don't have to worry right now. It's something that you'll, uh... _You'll figure it out when you're older." _She pivoted on her heels and hit the firewood, causing their little stack to fall down. "Ugh, why do we even have so many?"

"Today is Christmas, so Mom and Dad want a big fire to last through the night."

"_Ah, yeah, Christmas." _She repeated the name, trying to sound it out so that her accent would eventually fade. "_What is this Christmas anyway? Everyone talks about it but I don't really know what's going on."_

"You don't know what Christmas is?" Mikasa asked, both dismayed and fascinated at the piece of information.

Sakura frowned at her tone but shook her head. It wasn't like she was missing something big, right? "_I don't remember anything, remember?"_

"Oh, sorry... I forgot. Anyway, Christmas is when you give presents to the people you love because it makes them happy. Oh, and you eat a big dinner too!"

"Why?"

Mikasa's excited face disappeared, replaced by a thoughtful frown. "Huh... I don't know. Maybe Mom knows?"

Erick opened the door, letting the chilly winter air in for a second too long. He seemed extremely proud and content, if his grin and sparkling eyes were anything to go by. He placed a package on the tabletop and unwrapped it for the girls to see.

"Mikasa, go get your mother and tell her we have a goose."

The girl bolted out in a second, yelling at the top of her lungs that they were going to have meat for Christmas. If Sakura hadn't been so astonished to begin with, she would've laughed at her antics.

"Do you know how to cook goose?"

She smiled sheepishly and shook her head. "Not too late, right?"

Erick chuckled, and Sakura had to admit his happiness was incredibly contagious. "No, it's never too late to learn how to cook goose."

Mikasa dragged Mikoto back home, only for her to wrap her arms around her husband's neck and kiss him soundly on the lips. Both girls scrunched their noses at the same time, looked at each other in disgust, and then giggled when they saw they had the exact same expression on their faces.

The rest of the evening was spent preparing dinner. They were going to have the best potatoes Erick had harvested along with some lettuce Mikoto received earlier from a friend of hers. To top it off, they were going to have their _own _piece of goose, no need to share or save it to make it last.

What Sakura figured about Christmas was that it was a day to be happy because her tummy was going to be full.

Once the table had been set, they each said something they were grateful for this year. All of the Ackermans' responses had something to do with being introduced to Sakura, which made her feel warmth on her cheeks and in her heart, and she made everyone blush in retaliation as she expressed just how grateful she was with them for taking her in as their own.

"For a wonderful year!" Mikasa cheered, and the rest of the family echoed her.

Sakura thought that they would be too occupied in eating to have an ongoing conversation, but to her pleasant surprise they couldn't stop talking or laughing about the silliest of things, and the fact that they could be so entertained about something so simple made her heart clench even tighter in what she suspected was joy. It almost felt as if she was regaining that relationship she lost with Helsa.

Helsa... The name still made her unbearably sad, but having the Ackermans around made her much stronger than before.

"Presents!" Mikasa exclaimed when Erick returned from their room. In one hand he had a doll, which he gave to an unstoppable Mikasa, and in the other hand he had a piece of rolled paper, which he gave to Mikoto. Sakura had to admit that the moment she didn't receive a present, a brief flash of hurt passed through her mind, but she quickly squashed it; they had accepted her into their family and she was feeling petty that they didn't give her a Christmas present?

What a wimp.

"Sakura."

She blinked in surprise and turned towards Mikoto, who was now standing next to her.

"I never saw them... But my grandmother always described them in her stories so I tried remembering every single detail and made this for you. Merry Christmas."

She took the paper and gently unrolled it, feeling her chest become heavy and her eyes water when she saw the most beautiful cherry blossom drawing she had ever seen. She didn't ––_couldn't_–– remember ever seeing one, but a deep part of her mind recognized it and she knew it was beautiful. Even though the drawing was done completely in black ink, she couldn't help but appreciate the art style that reminded her so much of a home she didn't have memories of.

"_This is the most beautiful thing I have seen in my life_," Sakura murmured appreciatively, running her fingers down the kanji lines. She looked up to survey the family, unsurprised to see the tenderness in their faces. "Thank you so much."

Whatever Mikoto was about to say was interrupted by an unrelenting Mikasa, who begged Sakura to play with her dolls, to which she had to excuse herself from the dinner, much to Erick and Mikoto's amusement. Sakura thought that the younger girl had a burst of energy, but ten minutes later she was peacefully asleep in her arms, clutching the doll that suspiciously looked like Sakura, sans pink hair, close to her chest.

Any other day Sakura would have placed Mikasa in her own bed, but today the night was cold, and maybe she wanted to share the warmth Christmas brought her.

* * *

><p><em>February 10, 843<em>

Beinn was bustling with a bit more liveliness than usual. They were safe within the walls, the safe people spent more money, merchants earned more money and spent it on other things... Overall, the economy was good, and it was particularly good for Erick's produce stall, which had earned quite the reputation that extended almost thirty kilometers, well over two towns.

Sometimes people even sought them at their home, hoping to buy any leftover vegetables, even if it meant paying more for it.

Erick had quickly noticed that Sakura had a knack for selling. To begin with, she was very pretty and had exotic looks, which always attracted the attention of the crowd, especially travelers. After that she baited the prey ––_ahem, _customer–– her gentle voice and bright green eyes forced them to look for something to buy, whether it was to linger in the stall or to appease the girl. It certainly helped that her accent was endearing, which made people want to talk to her even more, which in turn built a strong loyalty. To top it off, whenever she encountered cunning customers, Sakura would put them in place with a no-nonsense face and snappy voice which even scared Erick himself.

He had once sheepishly admitted to her that he brought her as often as he did to Beinn because he always seemed to make more money whenever she was present. He had feared she would be hurt about his confession, but she only laughed, saying that she was more than happy to do anything that would make the stall more successful and even asking in a sly voice what they could do to earn more money.

To say he was proud was an understatement.

"Thank you for your purchase!" She handed over the paper bag containing around two pounds of barley, her biggest sale of the day for now.

The woman took the bag gently and grinned widely at her. "It's so nice having you around, Sakura. It was about time that father of yours admitted that you're better than him and let you come every day."

Erick wanted to glare at the woman, but he knew that she had just paid them handsomely so he only chuckled and patted Sakura on the head. "Oh, please, Mrs Berdine, she learned it from me."

Sakura playfully shooed his hand from her head and shot him a mock glare. "Yeah, right. Thank you for seeing the truth!"

Berdine chuckled and left with a wave, leaving the duo standing there in the chilly cold under the warmth of the sun. Sakura took a seat behind the stall and next to their cart, and noted with satisfaction that there was a big dent there. Maybe they would finish earlier than usual, even.

"So, what are we getting Mikasa?"

"You mean, what are _**you **_getting for Mikasa?"

"_What?"_

"That means where, right?"

Sakura blushed. "Ah, no, it means what. But why me?"

"Well, Mikoto and I always take turns getting Mikasa's present, but I think she would appreciate it if you gave it to her."

The kunoichi bit the inside of her cheek, deep in thought. It made sense to give her the task of choosing Mikasa's present. She hadn't seen her the whole day, since Erick always woke her up before sunrise to get to Beinn early, but she knew she would be expecting her present.

"Okay, I think I can do it."

Erick chuckled and patted her twice on the back. "Good! Now, leave the stall to me and go find a present for her. Here's the money."

He gave her a small bag which weighed little, but she knew that the amount of gold inside was more than what they usually spent on a single thing. Sakura stood up from her seat, removing the imaginary dust from her long yellow skirt, and left Erick to his own devices.

Even though there was a wealth of options, the street felt _empty_. Finding Mikasa a present should've been easy ––the girl was a doll maniac after all–– but for some reason she couldn't come up with a suitable idea. She wasn't going to give her another doll because she already had five. A book would be a boring present, and she was sure she wouldn't appreciate clothes because Mikasa wouldn't be able to play with them.

Her mind was quickly coming up with different birthday present ideas and almost discarding them immediately, but she still was aware enough to turn her attention to something that caught her eye. It was a beautiful wooden doll house, with three rows and three columns of rooms, and the roof was a sight to behold, with expertly painted lines and colors. The house was devoid of furniture, but Sakura could make her something as time went by.

She entered the store and immediately went to the person behind the counter. He was an older man with kind blue eyes and a thick mustache. Perhaps Sakura would be able to manipulate him into giving her a discount? She wasn't sure the ten gold coins she had with her would suffice to buy that beautiful house.

"Excuse me, sir, how much for the house?" Her voice was polite and warm, the one she had perfected with months of experience, and she pointed with a graceful finger at the house displayed in the window.

"Ah, for you, my dear Sakura, I am willing to sell it for twenty!"

Sakura internally cringed. There was no way she was going to be able to lower the price by ten coins. She looked around the store, trying to find any other woodwork that was pretty enough but much cheaper. "Um, is there something in the ten range?"

The man gave a thoughtful frown and eyed his store.

She almost smacked her head when she remembered she had fifteen gold coins she had saved up because she wanted to buy a new blouse. Well, she could always buy clothes another day, but Mikasa's birthday was today until the next year. "Oh, sorry, I do have the money. Here."

"Eighteen would be fine," the man said in a kindly voice.

Sakura beamed in pleasure and handed over the rest of the money, feeling proud with her purchase. She promised him the best potatoes from the next harvest, to which he only laughed and said he was looking forward to them. The store owner offered to help her carry the house, but Sakura denied his offer with a secretive smile.

She decided to take a shortcut, since the sun would soon start to set and Erick hated pulling their cart at night, saying that rocks were much harder to spot without light. Besides, even though the house weighed virtually nothing compared to what she could carry, it still felt a bit awkward carrying it around the streets.

The kunoichi skidded to a stop when she passed by the blacksmith. Even though people preferred shotguns and gunpowder to kill each other, those were weapons only the military and rich could afford. The rest of the populace relied on steel and arrows to protect themselves. Erick had a shotgun, but he seldom used it, claiming that he couldn't load it quickly enough.

She still remembered the conversation they had on Christmas, where she asked Mikasa why she was strong. If she gave her a means to protect herself and others, would she agree in training herself?

"What are you doing here?"

Sakura blinked, surprised to find herself inside the forge, because was this place _loud_. She had to admit she wouldn't mind working there in the cold months of winter, but it must be a bitch to be there hammering steel in the middle of summer. "I'm looking for a dagger."

The bald man grunted and pointed at the rows of daggers with a disinterested wave. Sakura held back a huff of annoyance and made her way to the daggers. She gingerly placed the house down, careful to not get any scratches or dirt on it, and eyed the weapons. Most of them were beautiful and well-made, but she only had seven gold coins to spend, which meant she had to go for the cheaper looking ones. Not that it really mattered, since this was Mikasa's first weapon and people usually received shitty first things.

She picked a simple dagger from a cluttered mess and unsheathed it. The steel was dull, but the edges were sharp enough to make her bleed slightly when she ran a fingertip along the edge.

"How much for this one?"

The blacksmith stopped hammering, and Sakura sighed softly in relief; that noise was making her head throb. "Five," he answered quickly and turned to go back to work.

Sakura frowned. That was a bit overpriced considering this was probably a failed dagger he hadn't even considered to sell. "The steel is not very pure, the edges are not that smooth, and the hilt could have been better. I'll give you three."

He grunted in annoyance but nodded slightly, accepting her terms. She smirked to herself in satisfaction, handed him the money, gathered her purchases, and left the small, loud forge without a parting glance.

Now the sun had really began to set, so she shouldn't have been surprised to meet an agitated Erick.

"Where were you all this time?"

"Buying Mikasa's present."

"It's late."

"I bought her a doll house and a dagger."

Erick stopped walking immediately, and the cart he carried on his back came to a full stop.

"Hm, maybe we should buy a horse to carry this one day," she thought out loud.

"You bought her a what?"

Sakura squirmed, a bit uncomfortable to hear such an edgy voice from Erick. "She's eight now, and the world is... is cruel. She should learn how to fight early to protect herself."

"And you know how to fight?" he asked, a suspicious and unbelieving but at least he didn't seem to oppose the idea so much.

"Of course."

"When did you learn?"

She frowned. "I don't know. I just woke up that day and knew how to fight, knew how to move."

"Oh," Erick exhaled softly. It was no secret that Sakura was a bit sensitive about her amnesia. It was something that frustrated endlessly, knowing things but not knowing _how _she knew them, and the Ackermans knew that they should leave the topic be lest they add unnecessary grief to the girl.

The topic of her hair was open, though. It wasn't a normal week unless someone made a joke at the expense of her pink hair, much to her annoyance. Still, she must like her hair, because she had not cut it once and it now reached her mid-back.

"Do I have your permission?"

"Only if Mikasa agrees."

The rest of their walk home was silent except when Erick whispered a curse after bumping into a small rock. Sakura was just anxious to give her gifts to Mikasa, knowing she would appreciate them immensely.

Their small house came into view and both of them unconsciously sped up, eager to get back home. They must've been loud, because the door opened and Mikasa bolted right at them, laughing and asking about their day and telling them how great hers was in one big sentence.

"Whoa, Mikasa, slow down," Sakura said with a chuckle. She crouched –– she was not so small anymore and her head towered over her–– and handed the doll house to her, inwardly relieved that she had enough sense to hide the dagger in her right hip. "Happy Birthday, Mikasa."

The girl stared at the wooden house with such reverence that it almost made Sakura laugh, _almost_. She took her gift somberly and clutched it to her chest. "This is amazing. Thank you, Sakura! Thank you, Papa!" She whirled around, running inside the house and yelling her thanks to her mother.

"By the way, how much did that house cost?"

"Ten," she replied without missing a beat.

* * *

><p><em>June 20, 843<em>

Mikasa aimed a punch at her right shoulder, but Sakura quickly side-stepped to the left to avoid being hit. She then made a low kick, and Sakura was about to simply jump, but she noticed the muscles in her left arm preparing to throw a punch, so she did a backflip and regained her balance almost immediately, putting herself out of harm's way without breaking a sweat.

Her pupil, on the other hand, was huffing and greedily gulping any air she could take. With a groan, she dropped down to the grass floor, exhausted.

"Why won't you... let me hit you?" she asked in between pants.

Sakura took a seat besides her, tucking a strand of her dark hair behind her ear. She really needed to make better ponytails. "Because I don't want to get hurt. Besides, the day you hit me is the day this is over, remember?"

"You made it sound so easy when you first offered this."

She grinned, recalling the look of smugness in Mikasa's face the first day of their lesson. Sakura had declared that the only thing Mikasa needed to do was land one hit, _one_, and the training would be over. She dodged her punches with ease and pointed out problems in her stance, counting the number of times she would be dead if this were a real fight.

The count had never come below thirty.

"I know, but you'll get it, eventually. Maybe in a couple of years seeing how good you are."

"_Years_? I'll be like, ten or twelve or thirteen! I don't––" Her rant came to a stop, and her frustrated face was replaced by a thoughtful frown. "When's your birthday?"

Sakura smiled sadly. "I don't remember."

Mikasa stood up and crossed her arms. "That's no good. If you don't have a birthday, you can't receive presents, right?"

"No," she replied slowly, unsure as to where her train of thought was going.

"Then today is your birthday, and you are... Hm, you're old, so you're seventeen starting today."

"Why today? And why seventeen?"

"Why not today? And what's wrong with being seventeen?"

Sakura puffed her cheeks out. "There's nothing wrong with them," she eventually said. "It's just a bit sudden... I never really cared about those things."

"Well, I do. So today, June 20, is your birthday. Happy Birthday, Sakura!"

She had half a mind to protest, but looking down at her excited gray orbs she couldn't help but give in to this little girl who, though sometimes bossy, was only looking out for her, even if she was about a decade older than her.

"Thank you, Mikasa. This will be the best––"

"Mikasa! Sakura! Come back! Doctor Jaeger is here to check on you two!"

The black-haired girl groaned and sat up, a lethargic look on her face. Sakura chuckled and stood up, offering her a helping hand, which she gladly took.

She thought Mikasa was going to challenge her to a race back home, but she did no such thing. She must be in no hurry to go back, considering the doctor was here for their yearly check up. She said that Doctor Jaeger did weird things, like putting a thing above her heart and listening in, checking her ears and mouth, asking if she felt something funny in her stomach, and she never liked it.

Sakura knew that he was just following a strict diagnosis protocol, something that she felt she had done countless of times, even though she didn't quite remember what. Maybe this Doctor Jaeger would serve to clear up a bit of her memory?

They entered their home with opposite expressions, but Mikasa's look of irritation quickly downspiraled into a grimace once she spotted the tools the doctor brought with him.

"Doctor Jaeger said the checkup will be short, okay? Now be a good girl and let him make sure you're healthy."

Her younger sister followed almost immediately, completing all of the doctor's requests without a single complaint. The doctor seemed to pick up on this, because he hurried through the tests, much to Sakura's amusement. In less than five minutes Mikasa was up and going, leaving the doctor without a parting glance.

"And is this the new addition to your family, Miss Mikoto?"

"Ah, yes, Doctor Jaeger, this is Sakura."

He beckoned her to sit on the chair next to his and started doing his routine checkup. "Now, I don't know if you're aware, but we've met before. Well, **_I _**met you."

"Huh?"

"Did Helsa not tell you?"

Sakura felt a lump on her throat, which she roughly swallowed. "She died," she said quietly.

The doctor's green eyes widened and then grew sad. "Ah, I'm sorry, dear, I didn't know that. I was friends with Helsa's husband... They were good people." Neither Mikoto nor Sakura said anything, opting to focus on the doctor's procedure. He cleared his throat, aware that he had brought forth a tense silence. "Anyway, I was the one that tended your wounds around a year ago. Which begs the question, just what did you do?"

"I have amnesia. I don't really remember anything before the day Helsa found me."

"No memories? That is a bit strange. I've had a few cases concerning amnesia. Most of them are from the military, and most of them dealt with a hard hit on the head, but all of them regained their memories in around a year or two."

Sakura shifted in her seat. What if she didn't remember, ever? What if she didn't find who she was or returned to her homeland? Yes, she was more than happy with the Ackermans, but she still felt as if she didn't truly belong, whether it was because they spoke different native tongues or the fact that she was a med-nin, trained to both kill and save lives, and most of the people here weren't even aware they possessed chakra.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll remember. It's just a matter of patience and not forcing things. Besides, I am quite curious to meet your parents, because I must ask just how did _pink _hair come to your family?"

Both Mikoto and Doctor Jaeger laughed, and Sakura only chuckled nervously and scratched the back of her neck in embarrassment.

"Oh, yes, I forgot to ask you a favor."

"What can I do for you?"

"Could you please register Sakura? I'm afraid the nearest center is a few hours away and I was under the impression that––"

The doctor raised a hand, stopping the rambling woman on her tracks. "There is no need to explain yourself, Miss Mikoto. It would be my pleasure." He got out a sheet of paper, quill, and bottled ink from his briefcase and placed it on the table. "So, Miss Sakura, what will be your full name?"

"Sakura Ackerman."

He scribbled her name on the paper with the land's alphabet. "Hm... Since we don't know your birth parents I'll put down the Ackermans' names. Is that okay?"

"Yes," Mikoto and Sakura replied in unison.

Doctor Jaeger nodded absentmindedly and jotted down more notes. "And date of birth?"

"June 20, 826."

Sakura noticed Mikoto's shocked face out of the corner of her eye, but she feigned attention on the doctor, who had an eyebrow raised but continued writing. "Oh, happy birthday then, Sakura."

"Thank you."

* * *

><p><em>April 4, 844<em>

"Ah, you brought potatoes today. That's good."

Sakura nodded and smiled widely. "We had a bit extra from yesterday. I'm still a bit new at inventory."

Berdine gave her a reproachful look. "You just started this, my dear. It takes a while to get used to doing this alone. I think you're doing a spectacular work."

Before she would blush at the compliment, but she was so used to being treated nicely by the townspeople that she only widened her smile a bit more until she was showing a bit of her pearly teeth. "I think it's a good think, though. Erick gets to tend the crops and make sure they're higher quality and I sell them."

"And how long have you been doing this?"

"Around a month or two?"

The woman laughed, the sound high and piercing. "Oh, dear, if you only saw the first months of Erick's arrival you would've died of laughter."

"That bad?"

"He was a young husband and his wife was expecting. That made him a bit clumsier than usual, for sure. But you received prior training, so maybe I'm being a bit unfair to poor Erick."

The day, which had been bright until now, darkened almost immediately. Both Berdine and Sakura looked up to see a huge gray cloud covering the sun. By the direction of the wind, it seemed to be heading in the direction of her home, something which made Sakura sigh in annoyance.

"Oh, my, it's going to rain a lot today, won't it?"

"It will... Too bad I can't leave just yet."

"Why is that?"

Sakura beckoned the cart full of food with a disinterested wave. "It's too full. Erick won't be happy with that."

"I'm sure he'll understand it if he saw how awful the weather is going to be. Nobody will be out in the streets anyway."

"You're right, maybe––"

"Excuse me!" a haggard woman interrupted. Sakura would have shot her a withering glare had her eyes not looked so crazed and desperate. "Has anyone seen my son, Anton? He is this tall, has dark brown hair, has a scar on his cheek? Have you seen him? He was playing in the woods. Please."

Berdine looked at the woman sadly and only shook her head. She excused herself from the conversation, leaving Sakura by her lonesome with the worried mother. "I'm sorry, Miss, but no, I haven't seen him." The woman became even more despondent, and the sight only tugged at her heartstrings. Who knew how worried she would be if Mikasa got lost? She wanted to help... And perhaps she was the only able to help at this moment. But could she afford it?

Well, she was leaving early anyway, might as well do a good deed while she was at it.

"But I can help you find him."

The woman's eyes lit with hope. "You can?"

Sakura nodded resolutely.

She reached out and grabbed both of her hands, moving them up in down in unrestrained gratitude. "Thank you so much, Miss! Is there something you want me to do to help?"

"Yes. Please stay here and look after my stall? I don't know how long I'll be gone, but just in case."

"Oh, of course, my dear. Anything you say."

"What part exactly do you think he is in?"

"He likes to play in the east side, but he usually comes back before noon. Maybe he got lost?"

That was a possibility, but it sounded too good to be true. "Okay, I'll start there. Please wait here."

Sakura ran down the mostly empty streets at the speed of a normal human, but once she was a long ways inside the woods with no one around, she sped up to inhuman speeds with her chakra and jumped up to the tree tops, scanning the area for any signs of chakra.

She was about ready to give up in her pursuits after half an hour when she sensed a very small chakra signature, possibly a child's. She grinned in triumph and headed that way, mindful to get out of the treetops and lower her speed once she was close by.

The pink-haired girl reached a small clearing and stood very still. At such close distances, it was impossible to exactly pinpoint the source of the chakra because every living thing had chakra in them. Usually humans had chakra spikes to them, but the signature had stopped being dynamic almost ten minutes ago, meaning the person was asleep or, worse, dead.

Her sensitive hearing caught soft breaths and she tiptoed towards the sound, which came from behind a big tree. She wanted to be annoyed, she really did, but she couldn't help but gush over the sleeping boy who clutched a black cat that appeared completely unamused about the scenario.

"_Aw, this is so cute_," she whispered in her native tongue and gathered the sleeping boy in her arms. The cat scrambled away once it was freed, but it stayed close to the pair, hinting that it was attached to the boy, regardless of its annoyance. "_If you want to stay with us you better keep up."_

She shot up and started leaping from tree to tree, though much slower and gentler than before so as to not wake her sleeping companion. When she was close to the forest's entrance she dove down and landed lightly on her feet, unsurprised to see the black cat next to her, licking its paws.

"_Hn, show off."_

Getting back to her stall only took ten more minutes, and the boy was still fast asleep. Anton only woke up once he heard the relieved cries of her mother, which soon became a yelling session as she demanded why he had run off and promising a world of pain once they came back home. Sakura awkwardly stood by, waiting for them to leave the stall, and only smiled slightly when the mother turned to her.

"Oh, thank you so much, Miss! We're new here, but I know where I'll be buying my vegetables for the rest of my life!" Well, at least she got a new, lifetime customer out of the deal. "Now come on, Anton, and you two, Blacky. Both of you are in a world of trouble."

The cat meowed, as if it understood what was going on, and followed after the pair, moving its tail left and right lethargically. The boy sneaked a look backwards and waved at her, offering her a mischievous grin, before his mother grabbed him by his ear and dragged him away.

Blacky? With a name like that, Sakura didn't blame it for trying to run away with Anton.

Sakura sighed and emptied the stall, storing the small amount of leftovers in the cart. She heard a strike of thunder in the west, in the vicinity of her home, and sighed when she realized it was probably raining already.

So much for not getting wet.

After an hour of dragging the cart in the mud and rain, Sakura saw her home in the distance. Sakura frowned when she felt no chakra signatures inside, but maybe they had gone to town to meet up with Doctor Jaeger without her knowledge. Still, the idea behind a warm bath and hot soup was so tantalizing that she sped her pace to a jog. She dropped the cart off under the small, extended roof where they stored all their farm tools and rushed to the front door.

She opened the door and looked down.

Sakura choked back a scream and fell down, landing on her bottom. She desperately slid away from Mikoto's unseeing corpse and the pool of her blood and tried to look anywhere but there but only felt something inside of her break once her back hit something soft.

She didn't want to turn, she didn't want to see, but the blood pooling coating her fingers was enough evidence for what she would see. Still, she jerked her head back and almost vomited when she saw Erick staring back at her, a bleeding hole in his chest.

Sakura messily got up, only for her knees to buckle and give away beneath her. She stretched out her arms to break her fall, but she scraped her palms, yet she didn't feel any pain at all. She was numb. So cold.

"_Mikasa_," she whispered in growing horror.

With new determination she got up and frantically searched every corner of the house only to find nobody. She didn't know whether to be relieved or anguished to not find her, because that meant she was alive, but that also meant she could be wishing to be dead instead.

She let out a shrill scream and started thrashing the Mikoto and Erick's. Her control on her strength snapped and she was soon smashing walls and breaking furniture. "_Why is it that when I find happiness, someone takes it away!" _she yelled in between punches and kicks. "_Why is it that after I do something good for others, something horrible happens to me!"_

The raging girl stopped after she ripped the skin from her knuckles, the pain acting as her anchor to the real world for now. She eyed the room with a wary eye, or at least what was left of the room, and only shook her head in dismay, knowing that whatever she did would change nothing.

Sakura left the room and headed back to the dining table that doubled as kitchen as well. She stared at the unmoving bodies of her foster parents and teared up again, though she did not sob or shake or grimace. "_I will find Mikasa and kill whoever did this to us. I promise there will be blood and pain for this."_

She went back to her room and ripped out her dirty skirt and shirt and changed into the old pants and long-sleeved shirt she had woken up in this world with.

Sakura went back to the woods and immediately took off, uncaring if someone saw her. She needed to find Mikasa as quickly as possible, and that meant she would have to give no shits about the status of her secret.

The rain made it impossible to track by scent, so that meant she would have to track Mikasa by her chakra signature. Luckily for her, she could detect her around a kilometer away, so she only had to close enough and she should be as clear as day.

She felt herself grow weak once she recognized Mikasa's chakra close to her, however it was surrounded by two others. She steeled herself to fight, coating her fists with enough chakra to rip a person apart, and sped up until she reached a small cabin with a lake in the background.

Sakura spotted her almost immediately but had to hold back her speed when she saw she was surrounded by Doctor Jaeger and an unknown boy. They were talking to her, but they immediately cleared the way when they heard her coming.

She dropped to her knees in front of Mikasa and hugged her tightly meanwhile she checked for injuries. She let her go slightly and unwrapped that red scarf from her head and surveyed her face, her anger churning deeply when she saw the blotches of blood in her pretty features. "Are you alright?"

Mikasa's eyes were empty, and that sight alone was enough to break her heart all over again. "Yes, Eren saved me."

The kunoichi let her foster sister go completely and she stood up, almost immediately noticing the young boy. He was around Mikasa's age, but those eyes of his burned with the determination and hate of an older man. "How did you save my sister?"

"I killed them. I killed the ones who did this to you."

Sakura wanted to feel grateful towards the boy, she really did, and in hindsight maybe there was some affection towards buried deep, but at the moment she was resentful that this nine-year-old boy had taken away revenge from her forever.

Perhaps it was for the best. That monster she had become around a year ago wasn't one she wanted to be again.

"I killed one too."

Her body froze, and she pivoted her torso slowly towards Mikasa, though she didn't look at her in the eye. "Did you do it to protect?"

She nodded absentmindedly.

"She protected me," Eren offered as an explanation.

Sakura managed a small smile and patted both children on the head. "It's good to protect each other."

Doctor Jaeger cleared his throat, drawing the attention back to him. "Ah, Sakura, I am deeply sorry about what happened. I was... talking to Mikasa about her future, and I offered both of you a place in my home. Would you like that?"

There was no way she would be able to return to that home again, not after what had happened, so she had absolutely no qualms in accepting. However, she felt a sense of nostalgia with this offer, because she was back at where she started not even two years ago.

She only hoped the ending wouldn't be the same.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, to clear something that may or may not have been explained fully. Sakura's real birthday is March 28, and as of the last entry she is really nineteen, but in the SnK world she is legally seventeen, few months short of being eighteen. Considering how short she is, it wouldn't be that big of a stretch to say she is a year younger.<strong>

**Good news is the story has become such a plot bunny mine that I have decided to focus my attention with it. Plot planning is almost over, and that brings me to my next news, though I don't know if it is good or bad: pacing. Maybe you already noticed, but I reaaally love to develop characters, even those that didn't get much screen time. Thus the romance, which will happen with an unknown character eventually, will be slow building. Sloowww. So I wouldn't expect Sakura to fall in love with anyone anytime soon, especially after the traumatic experiences she has been, and will be, through. Yay for trauma.**

**Also, my most sincerest thanks to asredwer, Bum reviews, Latin Gardenia, foraslanthelion, pepergirl001, Atsirk Enoh, brokenmaelstrom, Guest, Ace Clover, deedee2034, and JellyBean for being super awesome and leaving reviews that made me think long enough on where I want to take this story. Also, thank you to everyone who favorited and added this story to their alerts!**

**Reviews are motivation!**

**Penpal**


	3. Surviving

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"**Emphasis."**_

* * *

><p>Sunrises in Shiganshina were always bright and warm. Not only that, but the air was crisp, refreshing, whether it was because the people kept their district clean or because they were so close to Wall Maria that the freshness of the outside seeped in, allowing for a taste of the wilderness without ever leaving the safety of the walls.<p>

It was in the mornings that Sakura found the time to train Eren, Mikasa, and, quite recently, their blond friend Armin. She had heard a few weeks after the _incident_ on how Mikasa had frozen before landing the kill, and Sakura couldn't help but feel slightly guilty, because if she had been a bit harsher during her training, maybe Mikasa wouldn't have ever been in that position to begin with.

Eren had jumped at the opportunity to learn taijutsu, claiming that he would need it once he enlisted for the army. Convincing Kalura had been a grueling task, but now there Eren was in their practice field, waiting for her with an excited grin. Mikasa was standing next to him, staring at the wall that divided them from the outside world, seemingly brooding.

She frowned but paid it no mind, used to Mikasa's absentmindedness. Sometimes she had half a mind to ask her what she thought about in these moments, but almost immediately decided against it. It's not like she needed to ask, because she probably mused about the same things Sakura did whenever nobody was looking.

"Good morning, Sakura!"

Said girl only raised a pink eyebrow. "Well, aren't you the ray of sunshine today. What's got in to you?"

An innocent expression crossed his face, and Sakura mentally prepared herself for anything. "Nothing! Nothing! I'm just excited to see you."

"Eren, you're scaring her."

"Damn right he is. Stop being enthusiastic and act half asleep."

"But you'll beat me if I do that."

Sakura restrained the groan that threatened to escape her throat. Arguing with Eren was like arguing with a titan: impossible because they were incapable of understanding. "Anyway, where's Armin?"

"Probably asleep," Mikasa quietly supplied.

Well, it was very early in the morning, and didn't Armin help out in his family's bakery? Sakura shrugged and clapped her hands. "Maybe he'll show up later. Let's start."

"That's not fair," he whispered, and since it was only because of Sakura's sensitive hearing that she caught his sentence, she decided to let it slide.

The ten-year-old boy then pouted, wondering why Sakura was so slack with Armin's attendance when in contrast she would drop a bucket of water on his head if he was so much as a minute late. If he wasn't being so petulant, he would've realized that Armin had been forced to come to these training sessions by Eren himself, not out of his own volition, and maybe Sakura was a bit more perceptive than most people gave her credit for and she was respected Armin's wishes.

"Remember, if either of you lands a hit on me I'll teach both of you how to combine a low and high kick smoothly and _maybe_ I'll teach you how to do a body throw from a choke hold."

Eren looked as if he was ready to burst and even Mikasa had a small smile on her face.

Sakura didn't have a trademark pose, since she realized in a real fight she wouldn't even be able to have enough time to attempt it. Instead, she relaxed her legs and shoulders, so that whatever attack either one of her pupils threw at her, she would be ready to adapt and evade.

Mikasa was the first one to attack, throwing a punch aimed at her abdomen and preparing the other leg to to sweep her legs and make her lose her balance. Eren snapped out of his stupor in a second, going for more powerful strike to her face, lacking the finesse of his adopted sister. Sakura pivoted her body ninety degrees to avoid the punch, causing Mikasa to lose the opportunity to use her legs momentarily, and bent her back slightly to avoid the fist to her face.

When they first started these sessions in Shiganshina, Sakura had refrained from retaliating, claiming that they were too young to be on the receiving end of her hits. However, they had grown overconfident, attacking in the most outrageous and dangerous ways that would get them killed if it had been a real fight. Thus Sakura had decided that it would be a good idea to hit back only when their move was too unbelievable or simply wrong. It was a win-win, because the kids no longer screwed up as often, and Sakura had learned to control her freakish strength to the point that she could hit her pupils without breaking their bones. Sure, she used the strength a normal human would use to flick a baby, but at least her secret was safe.

If she had feared the Ackermans reaction about her status as a kunoichi, she was horrified at the idea of the Jaegers finding out about it, or anyone in Shiganshina for that matter. People were very close-minded about different things, especially the citizens of this district, since they were the closest to the titans. Anything that wasn't human, anything that wasn't _normal_, was an enemy of mankind, and even though Sakura felt pretty human most of the time, she couldn't deny that there were moments that she knew she could turn into these people's worst nightmare.

So maybe it was for the best if she kept her powers hidden in her closet.

She had been so lost in her thoughts that she miscalculated the amount of distance she had to put between Mikasa and her punch, and part of her pinkie's knuckles grazed her shoulder. It was fleeting, it was light, but it was there.

Mikasa must've felt it too, because her gray eyes widened and she immediately stepped back after finish going through her attack. Eren, still lost in his adrenaline, aimed a punch at her collarbone, which she stopped with the palm of her hand. Eren stared at her, wide-eyed, because she had never halted any of his attacks, but she smiled gently at him.

"You both passed."

The boy grinned and high-fived Mikasa, who was sporting a rare grin. If she smiled like that after grazing her shoulder maybe Sakura should let her win more often. Eren started laughing and boasting about how easy the fight had been, asking every once in a while, "Right, Mikasa?" to which she only giggled and nodded along.

Sakura frowned and hit him in the back of the head. "Alright, brat, first of all it was Mikasa that landed the hit, not you. So if anyone has the right to dance like a monkey like you're doing, then it's her."

Eren pouted and Mikasa only smiled even wider. "So when do we learn this body throw?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? But why?" he exclaimed, dismayed. Even Mikasa looked a bit crestfallen.

"You have work to do, and I have to do a couple of rounds with your father today."

Not only had Grisha Jaeger taken both her and Mikasa as his daughters, he had also taken Sakura as his pupil. It started when Sakura nursed a delusional Kalura back to health when he was out in the inland, and ever since then they hadn't looked back. He taught her all he knew about medicines and herbs from this world, and Sakura greedily took it all in, aware that she would not be able to expel infections with her medical ninjutsu all the time like she had done with Kalura.

Sometimes she wanted to reveal her secret to Grisha. When there was a need for a surgery, but they couldn't perform it because of the environment, Sakura wanted to step in and take the spotlight, saving both the child and mother and giving that man his leg back and extending the life of that grandmother who wished to see her grandson marry. It was something that had been ingrained in her head, to try her best to save a patient, but for some reason she couldn't come out and do it, because she knew that if she showed people the almost magical way she healed, they would never leave her alone.

They would shower her with both attention and work, gifts and demands, until the situation became too much and she would have to choose who to save, because time both her time and chakra were limited. Then people would curse her and despise her for not saving that wife and firstborn son, for letting that brave Survey Corps soldier who lost his limb die of blood loss, for denying that dying grandmother her wish to see her granddaughter marry the man of her dreams...

So no, she didn't want that life.

Maybe she was selfish like that.

Eren groaned but he knew he couldn't complain. What Sakura was saying was very true and not an excuse. Mikasa didn't mind, because she knew firsthand how important promises were to Sakura, but she didn't feel in the mood to deal with an impatient Eren today.

"Be good and don't get in trouble today, alright?"

And with that Sakura left her two adopted siblings in the field. Even though she was still dressed in her training clothing and indecent for most people, she was supposed to meet with Grisha in front of the Arlert's bakery. From there they were going to check on a girl's fever, an old man's cold, and, if time permitted, they would go visit the apothecary to see if they had the medicine to cure one of rapidly-spreading diseases in the mainland.

"We're also going to have lunch at home," the doctor said as an afterthought.

Sakura nodded, glad to see they were on the same page in the matter of food. "Good, because those two gave me a bit of trouble today."

"Oh, that Eren, always searching for trouble. I'm really grateful for watching out for them, Sakura. You didn't have to do that."

"Those two are special. It honestly is something I enjoy doing."

The two continued their walk on silence, which was only broken when they reached their first destination and greeted the mother of the feverish girl. She thanked both of them, because ever since they had given her daughter those herbs, her fever had dropped considerably and she was no longer delusional. Still, Grisha asked Sakura to complete a diagnosis and nodded in agreement when her conclusions matched his. The doctor told the mother to keep giving her the medicine for two more days and she would be good to go.

After politely refusing breakfast, the two headed to the old man's home, only to be greeted by his son. The young man let them know that his stubborn father went out to the fields today, even after being reminded that he was sick. Sakura sighed and shook her head, amazed at the pigheadedness of some patients, but Grisha had a better control on his professionalism. With a tired look he told the son to keep giving his father the medicine for five more days and then he would come back to check on him.

Since that visit had taken considerably shorter than what either of them expected, they headed down to the apothecary. Grisha had noticed in his last time that there was a new type of cold prevalent in the inlands and had asked the apothecary to conjure different types of medicine, which Grisha would use on different patients and see which one would work.

"This is one of the ways I stopped that disease a few years ago," he had confessed a couple of days ago.

Grisha entered the apothecary first and almost immediately started exchanging pleasantries with the man.

"Louis! It has been far too long!"

"That it has, that it has. Oh, hello there, Sakura! Doing some rounds with this old man here?"

"He needs someone to carry around his stuff. That bag is apparently too heavy for him now."

Louis guffawed and even Grisha chuckled, which was quite the accomplishment considering he was a very serious man. "Ah, yes, thank you for reminding me, Sakura. Anyway, Louis, you have something for me, as I recall."

The frail old man nodded, his long white hair following his movements, and retrieved five small bottles from behind the counter. "I made all of them with the idea of stopping the symptoms you mentioned, but I'm not sure if I got the right combination. When you come back we can tweak the composition."

Grisha nodded gravely and carefully put the five bottles inside his black case, not bothering to remove the cork and smell the medicine Louis had made. "Yes, I'll tell you about my findings in three days."

"Oh, you're leaving already?"

"Yes, I actually have a ship to catch in an hour."

"Oh, yes, yes, of course. Please don't let me keep you waiting. Have a good trip, Grisha."

"Thank you, Louis, I'll see you later."

"Good bye, Mr. Louis." Sakura bowed her head slightly and almost turned to catch up with the doctor when Louis called her back.

"Make sure to drop by tomorrow at one. I am helping with a birth at four, and you wanted to see one, right?"

The kunoichi nodded ecstatically, glad to finally be trusted enough to help in such a delicate procedure. "I'll be here, Mr. Louis! Thank you so much!"

The walk back to their home was nice and quiet. Though Sakura would rather talk, she felt it was _wrong _to be too chatty around Doctor Jaeger. It's not that he was unapproachable, because whenever she did strike a conversation with him he was always very responsive and attentive, but he always had such an intense look on his face, as if his thoughts were much too important to be interrupted, that she decided that her questions could wait for another time or another person.

Maybe it was her ability to know when to be quiet that made Grisha so fond of her.

Kalura was almost done with lunch when they arrive. She grinned and greeted them eagerly, asking them about their day. Like always, Sakura was the only one that matched her enthusiasm, complaining loudly about the stupid man that tended to his fields instead of his own health and gushing over the offer the apothecary had given her.

"Aren't you a bit too young to be looking at those things?"

"Oh, please, I'm nineteen! Some girls my age have already given birth, but here I am, by my lonesome, looking after kids half my age."

Her adopted mother raised an eyebrow and placed a steaming bowl of hot soup in front of her. "Oh, and since when did you want children?"

Sakura scrunched her nose. "I'm too young for that."

"Good," Grisha commented from her side. "You _are_ too young for that. You need to go to the university if you want to become a doctor, so no suitors for a while."

Her eyes gained a mischievous glint. "Really, Grisha? Or did you suddenly forget the things we were doing at her age?" Sakura choked on her soup and Grisha started coughing uncontrollably. Kalura smirked and declared, "My work here is done."

"K-Kalura! Don't say those things! What if the kids were here?"

"Then you would give them the talk just like you do to a bunch of strangers' kids."

Just then the door opened, and Eren and Mikasa stepped in with firewood strapped in their backs. "We're back," Eren announced.

Kalura turned around from the sink and smiled at them. "Welcome back."

Any other day Sakura would have paid attention to the family's antics, but she was too busy focusing on her soup and trying to forget the conversation they had earlier. If Eren and Mikasa were here, that meant that––

_No._

That train of thought was stopping, _now_.

"Eren wants to join the Survey Corps," Mikasa uttered, breaking the comfortable silence.

She could feel Kalura's earlier easygoing demeanor slipping into a more negative one.

"M-Mikasa! Why did you tell them?"

"Eren!" Kalura put her hands on his shoulders and shook him slightly. "What are you thinking? Or did you suddenly forget about all the people that die beyond the walls?"

"I didn't!"

"Then–"

"Eren," Grisha interrupted, putting a stop to whatever heated reply Kalura had. "Is there any reason why you want to go outside?"

The boy calmed down, but his eyes remained hard. "I want to see how's it like outside! I don't want to remain ignorant, inside the walls, for the rest of my life! Also... If no one helps out, then all the deaths until now would've been meaningless!"

Something changed in Grisha, she could tell. She wasn't sure exactly what it was, but she was positive something happened. "I see... Well, the ship is waiting. I'll be going now. Come with me, Sakura."

The pink-haired girl had enough restraint to not jump in her seat from surprise. She got up and placed her dishes on the sink, following after the doctor without a word.

"Wait! You have to talk to Eren!

"Kalura, human curiosity is not something you can stop with a lecture." He got out that intriguing key he always wore around his neck and showed it for everyone to see. "Eren, when I come back, I'll show you what I've kept secret in the basement this whole time."

The boy's eyes lit in wonder and excitement. "Really?"

Grisha only hid the key back inside of his clothes. "Really. Let's go, Sakura; a ship awaits."

For all the hurry the doctor had in the house, he was sure taking his sweet time in his stroll to the docks.

"You have been teaching Eren and Mikasa the martial arts for almost a year now. How is that going?"

"They are both eager and talented. I have no doubt that they will be quite the menace when they're older."

Grisha chuckled at her choice of words. "That's good to hear. Eren... Well, he is just like his mother in that aspect: once he gets an idea in his head, it is hard to beat it out of him."

"Human curiosity cannot be restrained with violence, either," Sakura cheekily supplied.

Luckily, the doctor found it humorous enough, because he chuckled. "That is true, which is why I don't have any other choice but to let this fixation of Eren's run its course."

"So what exactly is the problem?"

"Mikasa... Wherever Eren goes, Mikasa is bound to follow."

Sakura's eyes narrowed slightly. That was a statement that had a lot of evidence backing it up, a statement that she wasn't crazy about. She understood why Mikasa had that obsession with following after Eren and looking out for him. He had not only given her the will to fight, he had also given her a home, things Sakura had been unable to give her. Oh, Mikasa adored Sakura, she was absolutely positive about that, but Eren had a special place in Mikasa's heart that he, and only he alone, would be able to have.

"I'm not too worried about that. Mikasa is strong. She can take care of both herself and Eren."

Grisha turned to her, a surprised look on his face. "You're not going to follow them?"

"It's not set in stone that Eren will join the Survey Corps, to begin with. And even if he did... Well, I cannot look after her for her whole life. The day she joins the Survey Corps is the day she becomes an adult, and nobody can look after an adult the way I want to look after Mikasa. So even if I did join the Survey Corps, I still wouldn't feel satisfied."

"But you won't prohibit her from joining?"

"No... I don't have that kind of power. I would if I could, but my hands are tied."

Grisha hummed in assent and looked forward. The dock was there, and people were starting to board the ship. "You are a good sister, Sakura. If my son does decide to join the Survey Corps, my heart will feel a little lighter knowing that you are watching out for them."

"I won't disappoint you, Mr. Grisha."

"Oh, please, Sakura, I thought we were past the formalities."

She smiled sheepishly and stopped her stroll once they reached the dock. "Sometimes I forget, Grisha."

"Take care, all right? Make sure Eren doesn't do anything stupid."

"Sure will!" Not at all... Whatever that demon child decided to do was the law, and Sakura wasn't going to waste time going against his nature.

Sakura stayed long enough to see Grisha off and then took the long way back home. It was only in those long walks that she had time to think for herself, about herself. She still didn't remember a single thing about her past, which had annoyed her endlessly a year ago, but now she worried mostly about Mikoto and Erick, about how they were handed such an undeserving death and how she was given such a great responsibility. Mikasa was one of the most well-behaved children out there, but even she sometimes needed some disciplining. Kalura and Grisha had assumed that it would be Sakura the one handing out punishments, but soon took the task away from her once they realized she was unable to even land a single light slap on the back of her hand.

How could she? How could they expect her to hit the person she cared most about in the world?

It was for that exact same reason that she refused to dissuade Mikasa from joining the Survey Corps should Eren ever decide to. It was not because she couldn't, because Mikasa would undoubtedly follow her older sister's commands, but because she didn't want Mikasa to resent her. Sakura couldn't deny her anything, even if it meant opening the path to her death.

Sakura sighed and looked up. Sunrises were more beautiful in Shiganshina, but she still contended that sunsets were more beautiful in the farmland the Ackermans owned. The sun would start disappearing from the earth, coloring the skies with beautiful pinks and oranges and purples that contrasted masterfully with the green of the fields and the forests. There were no forests in Shiganshina, at least not very close, and Sakura missed them terribly, missed the sensation of jumping from branch to branch, because that was a feeling she associated with a home she couldn't quite remember.

Thunder rolled and the ground shook, which immediately set Sakura on edge. She observed her surroundings with a critical eye and her knees almost buckled underneath her when she saw a red hand gripping the top of Wall Maria. Almost seconds later a red face looked down on them, its beady eyes calculating, almost as if it was fully aware of what was going on.

All the times she had felt helpless were dwarfed with what she was feeling right now. Looking at the head of the titan, staring at its eyes, she felt such a deep, primal fear take a hold of her heart that she couldn't think, couldn't move. She was frozen in time, imagining her death, imagining a heroic rescue, imagining her flight. She wanted to move, she wanted to hurry to her family, but she could only stare at the titan that was scrutinizing them with an unreadable gaze.

The face bowed soon afterwards and Sakura felt dread pitting in her stomach. She was right to be so alarmed, because not even five seconds later, Shiganshina was covered in a monstrous boom, followed by flying rocks. Luckily for her, she was still far enough to be away from the impact size, but she knew that many others had already lost their lives.

Wait, her house was that way!

Eren and Mikasa and Kalura were there!

Sakura leaped to the rooftops, uncaring about the surprised gasps of the bystanders. She dashed from roof to roof, quickly making her way to her house, only to be stopped by the silliest, most disgusting looking titan standing in between her and the next house. It turned its beady blue eyes toward her, and the brown mustache in his upper lip curled with his mouth when he smiled eerily.

Its chakra though... Its chakra was one of the most horrifying things Sakura had felt. She felt goosebumps appearing in her arms and resisted the urge to shiver violently. The chakra was unnatural, devoid of any malice or goodness, and at the same time _so _familiar that she froze, allowing the titan to get the upper hand and attack her.

It reached for her with astounding speed, but Sakura was faster and jumped far back, putting sufficient distance between them. She landed lightly on her feet and used the leftover momentum to throw herself at the arm, smashing fist that had wanted to grab her with a chakra-enhanced punch. The bones cracked and the titan moaned in agony, giving her enough time to run away and change her course.

There was no way she would be able to kill a titan at the moment. She could punch them in the face and send their heads flying, killing them instantly, but being in the air would put her into a very dangerous situation, since she could be easily swatted and maybe killed. Climbing a titan was something else she could do, but she wasn't very sure how it would react to her; it could grab her or squash her just as easily as she could kill a bug that was going up her leg.

She was now a couple hundred meters away from her house and almost had a heart attack when she saw that a rock had crushed the wooden home. There was a titan standing over it, but she couldn't see much because its back was facing her. Were they... Sakura blinked and put a little more chakra behind her optic nerves to better observe the blond soldier that was carrying–– Mikasa and Eren! They were alive! Sakura sighed and placed a hand against her heart, weakly noting that it was beating faster than ever.

"STOP!"

Sakura immediately hurried towards Eren. That was no normal scream, that was a plea of desperation and grief.

_Crack!_

There were no cherry blossoms in Shiganshina, she was positive about that. In fact, she was pretty sure there were not cherry blossom trees anywhere within the walls. But at that moment, those scattered splotches of blood looked like the most disturbing, gruesome cherry blossoms petals she had ever seen in her life.

Eren's expression was all she needed to know what exactly happened.

She was in the perfect position. She could kill the titan and run away, unscathed, to her foster siblings. All she needed was to be quiet and soon there would be one less titan in this wretched world.

Unfortunately for Eren, he would have to find another titan to fulfill his revenge.

"Sakura! No!"

There weren't many moments were Sakura cursed her sister, but this was one of them. The titan that had killed Kalura turned around immediately and shot his arm forwards to grab her. She was lucky she had heightened reflexes, because she barely avoided his clutching hands midair and landed on its wrist. She coated the soles of her feet with chakra to stick to the titan and dashed with almost inhuman speed up length of its arm. Once she was in its shoulder blade, she punched it in the face with all her might, the strength so great that the neck could no longer hold the head and it flew out, crashing on a house far away.

Blood was splaying from the open wound, coating Sakura in its gore. She growled softly, "_Die, you piece of shit_." She wanted to keep hitting it, wanted to release her pent up frustration, but she knew that it was no use, because the titan was dead and she wouldn't be able to relish in its pained screams. Besides, what she was supposed to do now was lead Eren and Mikasa to safety and make sure they survived the day.

Her anger could wait for another day.

Sakura leapt from the titans shoulder blades and landed neatly next to the running soldier, Hannes, who had been a good ten meters away before. The three gaped at her, but she kept running to the evacuation site, ignoring their astonished looks.

"I'll explain later," she finally snapped after they kept looking at her like an alien. That seemed to break them out of their reverie, because they stopped looking at her and sped up.

People was gathered at the docks, clamoring and begging to be let inside and evacuate. Most of them parted for her after seeing Sakura coated in steaming blood, a telltale sign that it was a titan's blood. It didn't help that her normally bright green eyes were narrowed and spiteful. The scary-looking girl parted the crowds for her foster siblings and the blond soldier that had helped them, Hannes, persuaded the soldier who was standing guard to let them in the ship.

Sakura found a small spot in the ship and pushed some people to make enough room for the three of them, ignoring the protests of the other refugees. The moans and the desolation, the crying and the panic sent her over edge and made her want to punch something or _someone, _whichever. Eren kept muttering to himself, Mikasa was damn silent like always, and she was starting to lose her mind.

The boat started moving, signaling that they had reached the maximum capacity. The people waiting to get on grew desperate and some even started throwing themselves unto the ship.

The refugees' heads snapped in the direction of the giant explosion in Shiganshina. Not knowing what was going on was infuriating, but being helpless was just destroying Sakura's sanity. Until now, she was able to do something about things. She could've stopped Kalura's death if she had been faster, could've hurried back home like she was supposed to when those despicable sex traffickers had set their eyes on Mikoto and Mikasa, she could've killed more titans before boarding the ship, but no, here she was, running away like the good coward that she was.

_Love is better motivation than hate and revenge._

Sakura grunted and looked at her side, feeling her cynicism growing at the sight of Eren's angry tears and Mikasa's unseeing stare. Hatred seemed to be doing a pretty good job for the boy, if you asked her. Those eyes brimmed with determination and ruthlessness were perfect for slaying titans.

The boy suddenly stood up and made his way to the edge of the boat, gazing at the countryside. His friend, Armin, tried to stop him, but he only slapped his hand away and declared that he would drive the titans away for good.

She frowned slightly and looked at her side, noting with growing dismay the determination behind Mikasa's eyes. She knew there would be no stopping Eren from following his dream to extinguish titans, and the only way to do that would be through the Survey Corps, the military branch with the highest mortality rate.

Could life stop taking her precious people away for just one goddamn time?

* * *

><p>Armin's grandfather had his hands full caring for Armin, so it was up to Sakura to make sure Mikasa and Eren had shelter and food. She had not seen them much the first couple of days, leaving them to their own devices sometimes through the night. She had the responsibility of feeding them and caring for them, and since they were growing children they needed all the food she could provide, which resulted in her doing oddball jobs to earn enough money to pay for the stable she had found for them and exchanging favors for food.<p>

At the end of the day, Sakura was much too exhausted to answer the one burning question Eren and Mikasa had for her: who exactly was she?

She groaned and plopped down on the haystack. "Again?"

"You promised us an answer," Mikasa replied, still not bulging.

"Believe me, we have a long time ahead of us."

"Sakura, please," Eren pleaded. "I think we deserve to know. We trust you with our lives... The least you could do is trust us with your secret."

The pink-haired girl sighed, knowing his logic was sound and fair. She got up, leaving the haystack, and made her way over to where Eren and Mikasa were standing, urging them to sit down with her. Once they plopped down on the floor, she extended her arms and silently asked them to give her their hands. They slowly placed their hands face up on top of her palms, the welts and angry red lines of their attempt to save their mother still very visible.

"...Will you never speak a word about this to anyone?"

They both nodded firmly.

She gingerly covered their tinier hands with her own and started healing them with her chakra, the bright green glow soothing and warm. Both of them jumped, startled, and instinctually tried to retract their hands, but Sakura held on to them firmly. After a couple of seconds of absolute silence, Sakura released their hands, now perfectly healed and scarless.

"I do not know who I am," she confessed quietly meanwhile the children admired their palms in awestruck shock. "I just know **_what _**I am."

"What are you?" Mikasa whispered shakily.

"I'm not very sure there is a correct translation, but I am a _ninja_, or, more specifically, a _medic-nin._ My job is to both assassinate and save lives, healing wounds just like how I healed yours."

Eren was still staring intently at his hands, a bright grin spreading across his face. "This is so amazing. What about that strength?"

"What I used to heal your hands is called chakra. Everyone has chakra in the world, but only a few people can use it. I haven't come across anyone able to use it, which led me to believe that either I am a freak of accident or I don't belong in this world." This revelation seemed to hit them harder than her powers, because they now openly gaped at her. She didn't give them much time to dwell on it, because she continued, "I can manipulate chakra to do many other things, like enhance my senses and even my strength. I don't actively make myself stronger, because I'm already powerful as-is, but I can coat my fists with chakra and do what you saw me do to that titan."

"You sent its head flying," Mikasa said in awe. "Is there more you can do?"

Sakura frowned. This was something she constantly wondered, and the answer still upset her, even now. "Yes, there's more, but I don't remember how to do it. It's really annoying, because I can **_feel _**the knowledge there, I just can't access it. When I try to remember, it's as if it's in the tip of my tongue, but then it vanishes for months, repeating the cycle."

"Still!" Eren stood up, barely able to control his excitement. "This is so great, Sakura! If you joined the military, if you helped out the Survey Corps, we could exterminate the titans! We could––"

Sakura's eyes widened and she scrambled to stand, putting her hands in Eren's shoulders to balance herself and draw his attention to her. "No."

Eren blinked, confused. "What do you mean, no?"

"No as in I won't join the Survey Corps. I won't join them and abandon you two." She stared with downcast eyes at Mikasa. "We've been abandoned one time too many."

His shoulders relaxed and he gently took her hands off his shoulders. "The needs of humanity outweigh the needs of two children. We can handle ourselves, Sakura."

She chuckled bitterly. "I don't think you understand, Eren. Why would I want to fight for humanity?"

The question's bluntness shocked him, because he only managed an incredulous, "What?"

"The only two people I really care about in this world are in this stable at the moment. If I have to fight for humanity to protect you two, then I will, but right now is not the moment." Mikasa extended her hands toward Sakura, urging her to help her stand, and she readily accepted, hoisting her up with ease, but neither let go of each other's hand. "Besides, if I joined the military and made my powers known, I would become a weapon. I don't want to become a weapon."

"What's wrong with being a weapon? If it's for the sake of mankind, why wouldn't you want to give yourself to that role?"

Oh, Eren and his consequentialist ideologies... Sometimes the ends didn't justify the means. She felt that she knew that, felt that it had happened before, but there it was again, in the tip of her mind's tongue, out of reach. "Do you know what weapons are?" At the shake of their heads, she continued bitterly, "They are disposable, thrown away once their usefulness is over. They also die like dogs, remembered by loved ones, forgotten by everyone else.

"I'm a human, with feelings and passions, and I refuse to be treated as anything but a human."

* * *

><p>She spotted a familiar blond head in the front of the food stall. Armin was with his grandfather, arguing to receive their day's share of food along with three other loaves, which they claimed was for children. Naturally, the soldier handing them out was unconvinced.<p>

"Is there a problem here?"

The soldier was unamused and glared openly at her. "Yes, there is. You damn refuges are eating all of our food and lying about who's eating it!"

Armin looked up at her with nervous blue eyes. "That's not true! I was trying to get food for you, Eren, and Mikasa!"

He grunted. "She doesn't look like a kid to me."

Her green eyes narrowed, but she knew that the soldier had the upper hand. Besides, the people in line were getting restless and she didn't want to cause a commotion. "Fine, whatever, just give the children the food. I'm not hungry anyway."

He gazed at her with wary eyes but finally relented, handing Armin three loaves of bread and left to get one for his grandfather. The duo left the line and made their way to where she guessed Mikasa and Eren would be when she felt the intensity of Armin's stare. She looked sideways and almost instantly melted at the look of pure guilt in his face. She smiled and placed a gentle hand on his blond head. "Don't worry, Armin, I'm not hungry."

Armin opened his mouth to respond but his grandfather's voice interrupted him, "Sakura! I need to talk to you."

Sakura turned sideways and nodded to acknowledge his request. She looked back at Armin and gave him her most comforting smile. "Go give them their food, would you?"

The boy nodded and left without a word, leaving the kunoichi with his grandfather alone.

"It's good that I found you so quickly," he said softly between pants.

"Hello, Mr. Arlert. I hope everything is okay."

The man frowned. "It's not, or soon it will not."

She made a confused sound with her throat. "What do you mean?"

"Come with me."

Armin's grandfather led them from the crowded courtyard to a secluded hallway. She felt apprehension growing in the pit of her stomach at how careful he was in keeping whatever he was about to say secret, judging by how cautious he was when examining their surroundings.

"The food storage," he began with a sigh. "The government has no way to feed all these people along with the bad season for crops. At this rate, everyone will starve... But word on the street is that they'll send us refugees to retake Wall Maria."

Sakura gasped and took an involuntarily step back. "But that's impossible! We... We're not trained to fight titans!"

Mr. Arlert nodded gravely. "I know, which means this spells the death for many of us, but not everyone. There is a loophole to this: the military. The government won't send away any recruits because they need them now more than ever to fight against the titans. However, they are keeping really quiet about this, because they don't want too many cadets either. There are two cutoffs for the next Cadet Corps class: the person has to be under twenty-five to apply and has to pass a test."

"So you're telling me I should join the military."

"If you want to live past the next year, then yes, I suggest that."

"You saved my life, Mr. Arlert," she whispered, her eyes filled with gratitude. "I promise I'll find a way to save yours too."

The old man laughed, the sound meant to be joyous, but coming out more as regretful and resigned. "No, no, there is no saving me, Sakura. I'm an old man, I can't do much by myself, let alone do something for society. This world needs the young, not the old, and that's the way life works."

"Mr. Arlert... If there is anything, any favor, I––"

"I only ask that you to watch over Armin," he requested. "I have seen how you strongly you keep Mikasa and Eren out of danger, and I only wish you do the same for Armin."

She looked sideways, a slight frown on her face. "I won't be able to do that anymore. Eren has expressed desire in joining the military, and Mikasa will follow... So I can no longer keep them out of danger."

He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, making her stare at his understanding eyes. "Maybe I need to rephrase my request. Protect Armin for me. Keep him alive to the best of your ability."

"You have my word, Mr. Arlert."

She would've protected the boy anyway, but now she had an even stronger and firmer reason to do so.

* * *

><p>"There will be three stamina tests to secure your spot in the 102nd Cadet Corps Class! First you will jog around the perimeter of this training camp until the first two hundred drop. Then you will stop and put on your 3DMG with our help if needed and continue running until the next one hundred fifty drop. The remaining three hundred fifty will carry a fallen cadet and run until the next fifty drop. If you can't run, you will die; if you can't run with your gear, you will die; if you can't run with a wounded comrade, you both will die! We don't need dead people in our ranks!"<p>

Sakura stared grimly at their proctor. She was old, but her voice was commanding and instilled fear in most of the cadet hopefuls. Apparently she wasn't the only one amongst the refugees to hear the interesting piece of information Mr. Arlert had given her. This was the biggest class the military ever received, far bigger than what their budget allowed. They needed to feed all their cadets, and with the lack of food humanity was experiencing, they needed to quickly get rid of the useless ones. In fact, even after the cutoff, they were going to still have an excess of around fifty cadets.

"We will take turns running behind you! If you are too slow and we catch you, you are out!"

It was a ruthless test. Everyone knew that the ones that dropped would die in less than a year, but the proctors still stared at them with unwelcoming, unsympathetic eyes. A little bit of compassion would never kill anyone, but these soldiers must've missed that memo because they were as cold-hearted as they came.

"Ready, set, go!"

They all started jogging immediately, their panic setting them on the edge. Even though Sakura had amazing stamina, she knew better than to lead the line. Those jogging too fast would soon tire out and be the first to drop, after all.

A yell broke her out of her musings and with a backward glance she saw one of the proctors following them catch three unsuspecting cadets. He might as well shoot them right there and save them the misery later on. Sakura sped up then, quickly taking the lead and easily maintaining it, much to the surprise of her fellow competitors.

The running lulled her into a sense of comfort, and she unwittingly remembered when she told her three wards that she was enlisting in the military to save her hide from dying out in the fields. She had wanted them to try to convince her otherwise, to convince her to stay because they had decided not to join the Survey Corps and they needed her, but Eren only smiled happily and asked her to wait for them. Mikasa and Armin nodded reluctantly, still unsure of their own choices, which made Sakura feel a little better.

A whistle interrupted her reverie and she looked around, surprised to see everyone breathing heavily. Some were walking away with dejected heads, telltale signs that they had not made it. She made her way to the small house and asked one of the soldiers to help her put her 3DMG on meanwhile she drank enough water to satisfy her thirst but not upset her stomach at the same time.

"Alright you ungrateful bastards, go!"

The remaining cadets started running, though their speed was severely stunted. The 3DMG, though surprisingly light, was still uncomfortable to move around with. It took Sakura around ten laps to get used to the weight, and by then around fifty cadets had already left and were making their way to the center of the field with the rest of the rejected.

She kept jogging lightly in the front, unmatched by anyone. She already attracted quite a lot of attention due to her pink hair, and being the one cadet that didn't get tired was not doing wonders to her reputation. It couldn't be helped that she knew how to use chakra and make her body more resilient and powerful than a normal human's. Well, that certainly gave her an unfair advantage, yes, but she needed to stay alive for the sake of Mikasa, Eren, and Armin.

This wasn't just her life on the line.

Everyone heard the whistle and let out a breath of relief. They headed to the middle of the training grounds and most of them greedily gulped all the water they could take. Sakura only took small sips, mindful to not drink too much. She wiped the excess water from her mouth and looked around, cringing internally at the marked silence between the cadets that were still in the game and those who were out.

It wouldn't hurt to make a conversation with the person she would carry for a while, would it?

"Hey." She should call her a woman, because she certainly looked like one, but her eyes were so lost that she couldn't help but mentally call her a girl. "Do you mind if I choose you to be my partner?"

She recoiled, a bit shocked. "Why me? I'm heavy and tall, and you're so short and skinny. Everyone is betting that you're gonna be one of the first ones to fall right now."

Sakura held back her smirk. "What about you?"

The girl gaped at her and blushed. "I..." She looked away and mumbled, "I bet for you."

She couldn't hold it anymore and giggled. Sakura could feel the stares of people focused on the two of them, but she didn't mind; she was laughing, genuinely laughing, and there was nothing that could hold her back. "Oh, I wouldn't worry about that. I promise I'll make you win. So, what do you say? Will you let me carry you?"

"I–I guess."

"Thanks. What's your name?"

"Bertha. Yours?"

The soldier yelled at them to prepare themselves. Sakura extended a hand towards her, and was secretly happy when she accepted without hesitation. "Sakura. Nice to meet you, Bertha."

The kunoichi didn't give her time to prepare and put an arm in the middle of her back and another in the back of her knees and she lifted her with ease. She started jogging ahead of the crowd, and had to restrain her laughter when she saw Bertha's shocked expression. Sure, her method of carrying her was a bit unorthodox, but Bertha was too tall and she would sure hit her 3DMG with every step she took. She could also carry her on her shoulder, but then that would be extremely uncomfortable.

So she was the only one carrying her cadet as if she were running in a field of dandelions, complete with the smile on her face and the blush on Bertha's.

Sometimes she really cracked herself up.

Much to everyone's surprise but her own, Sakura finished at the lead once the whistle stopped them again. She was panting, but she was in better shape than everyone else, who thought that the dirty floor would be the best place to lay down and rest. She gingerly put Bertha down and thanked her deeply for spending time with her, even if it was in less than optimal conditions.

"Alright, you brats, don't get cocky! You still have three years ahead of you!"

That put everyone's spirits down, especially the ones that hadn't made it, because three years was two years more than what they were expected to survive. Tears filled Bertha's eyes and she brokenly whispered her thanks to Sakura for making her win the bet and turned away from her.

Her heart gave a painful clench and she grabbed Bertha by her bicep. She whirled her heads towards her, with tears streaming down her face and a confused frown.

Sakura was at a loss for what possessed her to grab unto the woman, but her mouth tightened to straight line on its own and she blurted, "Live."

She smiled sadly and left without a word, leaving the winner alone in the field.

* * *

><p><strong>When Sakura says that she's a ninja and a medic-nin, the words she used were kunoichi and iryo-nin.<strong>

**Fun Fact: The original draft for this chapter included Sakura saving Kalura. However, after re-watching and reading SnK for like the third time, I noticed how many times Eren flashbacks to his mother being eaten and realized that interfering with _that _plot point is a no-no, at least for Eren's development. So, sorry Kalura.**

**Pairing is still undecided, but after 7 people requesting LeviSaku I am leaning towards that. I personally lean towards it too. I will probably decide by the time she meets and interacts with almost the whole cast at least once, which will be in around five chapters, give or take one?**

**Also, just a reminder that this is not God-mode Sakura story where she kicks so much ass it hurts. Most of the times she won't be able to save the day. The story is only as good as its conflict is, meaning if you make Frodo a Jedi you gotta give Sauron the Death Star (Yes that phrase is not mine). That's not to say she won't become powerful, because AU baby, but by then Sauron would definitely have the Death Star _and_ the Star Forge. Also, she _is _a ninja... They are supposed to keep their secrets close to their hearts and whatnot.**

**I would like to deeply thank Guest, Atsirk Enoh, pepergirl001, peach, Kitsukami, brokenmaelstrom, Genuinely-Unique, OnePiecefan202, LadyRidger, Lori, asredwer, mun3litKnight, Basia Orci, and Arisu-kun for being so awesome and leaving reviews. Your kind words always encourage me to get a chapter out extra early. Also many thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Reviews are life,**

**Penpal**


	4. 102nd Trainees Squad

Reading guide for this chapter:

"Talk."

"_Emphasis."_

* * *

><p>The entrance ceremony was not only uneventful, but also depressing. They had lost half of the cadet hopefuls, and most, if not all of them, would be dead by the end of next year.<p>

She landed on her bed and put her arm across her eyes, shutting them from the light immediately. She knew that they weren't going to send children to reclaim Wall Maria, but what was the definition of a child? A seven-year-old? A fifteen-year-old? A ten-year-old? What exactly was the cutoff age? If either of those three were ordered to go, she would go crazy.

"Is the bunk below yours taken?"

Sakura removed her arm from her face and sat up to get a better view of the person addressing her. She looked very young, and she was very short, perhaps shorter than Sakura, which was quite the feat by itself. However, she knew better than to judge her based on looks alone; this girl had survived the laps of death, after all.

"No, not at all. Take it."

She smiled, her amber eyes crinkling. "Thank you, Sakura!"

Sakura cocked her head to the side, surprised. "You know me?"

The girl snorted, as if the question amused her. "Who doesn't know you? Not only did you carry a girl that looked twice your weight, you finished first. Besides, the hair doesn't help."

Sakura smiled sheepishly and ran a hand through her long pink locks. "Heh, true, true. But it's a bit unfair how you know mine and I don't know yours. We're gonna be bunk mates, after all."

The girl put her suitcase on her bed and beckoned her to come down. The nineteen-year-old did so quickly, foregoing the ladder and jumping down straight ahead. This action seemed to amuse her new bunk mate, because she started giggling uncontrollably.

"Is something wrong?"

She waved a hand up and down. "No, no, nothing. It's just that people say that you're this cold and serious person who doesn't want to meet people and it's just funny that you did that right now."

Sakura frowned and pouted, not appreciating how the rumors painted her as such an unapproachable person. She smiled often, right? Or was it maybe how intimidating she had been in the test? She should've known it was going to bite her in the ass. "I don't know where that rumor came from, honestly."

The girl extended a hand towards her. "Petra Ral from Honig, in the middle of Rose."

She took her hand and shook it firmly. "Sakura Ackerman from Shiganshina, south of Maria."

Petra immediately retracted her hand from hers, and looked at her in a mixture of shock and apprehension. "Where you there when..." she trailed off, unsure on how to continue her question, or too scared to offend her, Sakura wasn't too sure.

She appreciated the gesture, nevertheless. "Yeah. I was there."

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked. My parents were from Shiganshina too, but they moved to the north before I was born. I heard many of their friends died that day."

"We were unprepared," she told her quietly. She remembered her inability to save Kalura, her helplessness as the Armored Titan broke through Wall Maria, her failed promise to protect her wards. "No one saw it coming."

"You saw the titans then? How... Are they as scary as everyone says?"

She sighed and sat down on the floor between their beds and the other two bunk beds in the other side of the room. She wondered where their other two roommates were, but then she remembered that she had finished her dinner earlier than anyone else and had quickly retired, meaning that they must be still eating. "They are scary, but what they do is scarier. Especially because they're so big, you can only feel like an insect in comparison."

"That was my main reason for not wanting to join the military. I can't bear the thought of meeting them..."

"Then why are you here, if you don't mind my asking?" She didn't phrase her question rudely; she was genuinely curious as to why the girl had joined the military if she was so scared of titans. From what Sakura could tell, she wasn't in any danger of being chosen to go retake Wall Maria because she was a citizen of Wall Rose. If anything, she should be avoiding this place at all costs.

"My dad wants me to join the Military Police and get as far away from Wall Rose as possible. They're scared one of those two special titans might appear any time soon and take us by surprise again."

Sakura nodded slowly, a thoughtful look in her face. "That makes sense. I don't blame your dad for thinking like that. I'm not entirely sure about all of this either."

"What about you, Sakura? What do you want to do after all of this?"

She shrugged. She still wasn't sure about what she was going to end up doing. Deep down she knew chances were she had to join the Survey Corps, but she still held on to the hope that she would be able to convince Eren to join the Military Police and live a peaceful life inside Wall Sina. Who knows, maybe he would marry Mikasa there (or not, if they didn't like each other that way when they were older, she was okay either way), and she would marry some civilian who could give her a taste of a normal, stress-free life and make her forget about Shiganshina.

"I'm not very sure right now. It could honestly go either way."

Petra cocked her head to the side, her gaze confused. "You don't want to join the Military Police."

"Still not sure what I want to do. There are many variables involved."

The girl's mouth opened slightly and she close it soon afterwards, nodding in understanding that she didn't feel like discussing the topic at hand. "Hm, I wonder where our roommates are."

Sakura snorted. "Maybe I scared them away?"

The girl laughed and her honey eyes crinkled in amusement. "That would be awesome! Imagine having a whole room to ourselves! No need to worry about––"

A knock interrupted their door and one of their trainers whose name escaped Sakura stood at the door rigidly. Both girls jumped and stood at full attention, their right hand over their heart and their left behind their backs.

"Due to a lack of girls, you two have been assigned a room to yourselves! Remember that there is training in the morning!"

"Sir, yessir!" they replied in unison.

The commanding officer's glare softened a bit and he closed the door behind them, leaving them a mess of giggles as soon as they were sure he was far away. "We should say stuff like that more often!" Petra said between gasps.

Sakura nodded along, unable to form a reply. Soon after their sniggers died they both agreed they were exhausted and quickly went to bed. Even though the other two beds were free, Petra still took the one below hers.

She faced the other two bunk beds as Petra's soft snores filled the room and couldn't help but think that Bertha could be sleeping with them in this room right now.

* * *

><p><em>You had chakra, of course you beat the stamina test. You could have been me, and I could have been you, if you didn't have your precious chakra. And now here I am, facing titans. And now here I am, about to die, without anyone crying for me.<em>

* * *

><p>It was customary that the cadets were tested on their balance the first day after the ceremony. Not only did it give the trainees a feel of what they were going to use for most of their military careers, it served as a way for the officers to quickly judge where in the gifted spectrum the cadets were.<p>

Their instructor was a harsh man by the name of Emil Ernst. His hair was silvery and his face was filled with wrinkles, but his eyes held such wisdom and experience that there was no single trainee who dared to cross him. Rumor was it he had killed over one hundred titans in his career in the Survey Corps before joining the Military Police and even quickly rose through the ranks there.

There were five 3DMG testing sites set up so that five cadets could go at the same time. Though this made the process slow, since there were three hundred people to go through, it did give everyone a clear view of what was expected of them and what they were supposed to do.

Sakura admired Petra's form. Though she had made her hesitance to encounter titans very clear, she was masterful in keeping her balance and people were already murmuring that she had a very real shot at being the valedictorian. Though it slightly irritated her that people were making such a long-term judgement based on a simple task, she had to admit that Petra's form was by far the best.

"Ackerman!"

She sighed under her breath and made her way to the testing site Emil was pointing at. She could see that suddenly all the stares were on her, but she didn't care about that. What she cared was about the officer currently strapping the 3DGM around her waist, making sure he didn't screw up anywhere. She knew her inhuman reflexes would kick in if something went wrong, but she didn't want to raise unnecessary questions right now; her pink hair was novelty enough.

They hoisted her up and she felt a tiny bit of panic at not being able to touch the ground but she quickly got used to the feeling of being in the air. To be honest, she felt a certain degree of freedom in being up in the air. Usually she required to actively use chakra to perform something extraordinary, but here she was, "levitating" without using her power once. For once, she felt as she was achieving something based on her own merits.

Now that she was used to the feeling, she relaxed her somewhat stiff body slowly, allowing her to shift as she went adapted to the shift of the wires. Soon her body was so relaxed that she was swinging lightly along with the wires, completely at ease with the feeling by now. People were starting to murmur in the crowd, pointing fingers at her and making her feel uncomfortable.

"Okay, that's enough. Bring her down!"

Sakura felt slightly disappointed that her moment of freedom was over so quickly, but she quickly squashed it by reminding herself that she would be using the 3DGM for quite a long time.

Even though Emil didn't tell her anything, her perceptive eyes could see the surprise and slight awe that he had for her performance. That was enough to make her feel proud of herself, because for once in her life people were amazed by something she had done herself. She did not have to rely on her muscle memory or her chakra to do this, this was all her and her gift for learning quickly.

Petra tackled her arm and shook her slightly. "That was amazing! How did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"_That_. You just stood there like if nothing was happening. It looked as if you could walk on air!"

She didn't know how to react. If she brushed off her comment and said it was nothing, she would come off as arrogant and maybe upset her rapidly-becoming friend. However, if she went and lied about how hard it was, she might come off as arrogant as well for overplaying her feats. So, either way, it was a lose-lose for her. "I guess I just felt relaxed up there. Tall, you know, something that we're not."

That seemed to be the right answer, because she giggled. "I'll follow your advice next time. Could you give me some pointers later on, though?"

Sakura smiled. "Sure, Petra. Just tell me when and I'll be there."

* * *

><p>It was the first time the 102nd Trainee Corps Class saw her excited, but right now they couldn't care less. It was hard listening to a lecture trying to persuade them that something useless they were about to do was actually useful. They were hypocrites, really, trying to convince them to practice hand-to-hand combat when it wasn't graded that highly anyway.<p>

"You're too excited about this," Petra commented with a sulky voice.

Sakura gaped at her, horrified about her _lack _of excitement. "Are you kidding me? This is awesome!"

"I take it you have some experience in this."

"My specialty, if I can call it that."

"You have many specialties, do you know that?"

"So I've been told, but so do you."

"I guess we're women of many talents, aren't we?"

"Rawr."

"Ackerman! Ral! If you're done with your girly chat we would like to get on with this lesson!"

The two girls froze up and looked down to the floor, their cheeks heating up instantly when they heard the barely contained snickers around them. Ugh, red cheeks clashed horribly with her hair.

"Ackerman! Bozado! You're fighting here!"

She made her way to where Emil had pointed, her cheeks still a bit red from embarrassment. Standing there was a man with unruly dirty blond hair a couple of inches taller than her. His small hazel eyes were cocky and he seemed to have a perpetual smirk. "So I got paired up with Pinky, huh?"

Sakura's eyes twitched in annoyance. She vaguely recalled the cat she saved, Blacky, and suddenly felt guilty for not stealing him and renaming him. "Don't you have better things to do than antagonize girls, you old man?"

Bozado tried to play it off cool, but she noticed his hands clenching and unclenching, a clear sign of irritation. "_Hey_, I'll have you know I just turned seventeen, so I don't know what you're talking about, _Pinky_."

Her nose wrinkled in disgust. If this kid was two years younger than her, just exactly how old did she look? She grew slightly panicked until she remembered a conversation she and Petra had earlier about their appearances, how Sakura just adored her honey hair and Petra commented that her ivory skin looked youthful enough to make her think she was fifteen.

"Start!"

Bozado got into a sloppy fighting stance meanwhile Sakura just stood there, relaxing her muscles. After countless of practices she had learned that her body was best-suited to retaliate, not start. This gave her a chance to see her opponent's first movement and devise a strategy to quickly incapacitate with the minimum amount of effort and time required.

"Ladies first," he said with an arrogant bow.

"Go ahead then," she replied without missing a beat.

That seemed to get him, because now not only did his fists clench, but his eyes narrowed even more. "I'm being nice here. Hit me."

"I've made it a habit to let my opponents hit me first. It would be too unfair otherwise."

His forehead twitched and his lip curled. "Why you!" He launched himself at her with a bit too much force, but she had already seen his punch coming a mile away. She sidestepped and put her foot where she was, immediately tripping him. She quickly got away from him and took his old spot, standing there innocently and looking away.

He scrambled up and glared daggers at her. "That was unfair!"

"That's why I let you go first."

Bozado growled and charged at her with the intention of putting her in a choke hold and possible doing a body throw. Even though he had been acting cocky beforehand, Sakura knew that he had a very good reason, because he knew what he was doing. Sure, his form was somewhat sloppy, but he had obviously had training in hand-to-hand combat, something most of the recruits couldn't boast about.

She crouched, avoiding his choke hold, and swept her leg at him, hoping to throw him again. Much to her surprise, he jumped high enough to avoid the attack and as soon as he landed he aimed a low kick at her abdomen. She knew avoiding this one would be hard because she was crouching, but she bent her back enough to avoid the kick narrowly and used the power of her arms to quickly lift her body backwards to do a handstand and let herself fall gracefully enough to land lightly on her feet.

He just stared at her in shock but shook his head, snapping out of his reverie. He aimed a punch at her shoulder but she stopped him with a swift kick to his inner arm. He cried out in pain, and she used his distraction as an advantage to move next to him, wrap one arm around his waist and the other one behind his head, and she brought them both down to slam him to the floor as if he were some little kid.

The impact probably ripped the skin from her knuckles, but that was fine, since the point of the spar was to _not _kill her partner. His head was moving from side to side, probably dazed. She had gone a little bit overboard, because her left shoulder hurt like a bitch and that wasn't supposed to happen. She retrieved her hand from the back of his head and stood up, yet again ignoring the blatant stares from her fellow cadets.

He was probably still seeing stars, but she saw his eyes focus on her, and from the frown on his face he must not be very happy with her. She extended her left hand first to help him up, but upon seeing the blood dripping down from her knuckles, she quickly changed it, smiling sheepishly down at him. Seeing that she was not unscathed probably did wonders to his mood, because he took her hand and hoisted himself up.

"Not bad, Ackerman."

"Sakura."

"I knew that."

"All right, _Bozado_."

"Oluo."

"I knew that."

* * *

><p>The training field was empty except for a tiny pink-haired girl doing push ups, her light breathing betraying the number of sets she had already done. The sky was darkening quickly, which meant curfew would soon be called and she might miss dinner, but she couldn't care less. She was working, training her physical strength to her body's limits. Today she had seen Petra carry a grown man by herself with little to no effort. Sure, she could carry three times her own size easily, but that was with the help of chakra.<p>

She wasn't very sure where the limits of her body stopped.

It surprised her, how agile and powerful the cadets were. They threw themselves down cliffs to see how easily they could turn and shoot the grappling hook to stop their descent, they ran for miles with heavy backpacks, they cut down trees with just their steel blade and muscle... The cadets did all of that _without _chakra. They were amazing in that aspect, and they were just first years. No one had hailed a single one of them a genius...

Well, no one until now, but there were whispers of a certain pink-haired prodigy who outranked all of them because of a tiny _insignificant_ thing called chakra.

Her peers and superiors admired Sakura, but they didn't admire _her, _but rather her _chakra_, and they weren't even aware of that. To them, Sakura was simply a hidden gem in a field of coal. If she had been normal, she would've been even worse than coal; at least coal could be turned into a diamond. If she had been normal, maybe Bertha would be here in her stead.

Everyone wanted to be like Sakura, but she wasn't even like them to begin with. They were comparing themselves to a farce.

Her arms shook and she collapsed on the floor, her chest receiving the brutal end of the fall. She groaned and turned her body around so that she was laying down with her back against the ground.

The sun was almost set, and the stars were starting to appear in the purple sky. Even though the darkness covered most of the field, if enhanced her eyesight she could see almost as clearly as if it were daylight. As much as she wanted to hate what made her different than the rest of the people she would fight with, she couldn't help but admit it was extremely useful.

She heard footsteps approach her and she wasn't at all surprised when a woman stopped just before hitting her head. Her skin was darker than most, and her eyes were two large black jewels that glittered with amusement and something else. From her vantage point she looked taller than her, but then again that wasn't hard considering Sakura was one of the shortest recruits.

"You will miss dinner if you continue like that."

The woman extended a hand towards her and Sakura warily took it. She had never seen her before, which was a bit weird, since her looks were quite exotic and she almost never missed anyone like that. Then again, if Sakura was bad with names, she was horrible with faces.

"Thanks," she murmured, still a bit out of her element. "I know this will sound rude, but who are you?"

She laughed, the sound harsh and throaty. "It is quite alright, Sakura Ackerman. I don't expect you to know everyone in our class, especially when most people avoid you like a plague."

The pink-haired girl blinked. She was actively avoided? "What? Why?"

She raised a thick black eyebrow, as if the question should already have an answer. "Your determination intimidates most people. Not many can do five sets of fifty push-ups in less than an hour."

"You've been watching me?"

"Perhaps I admire determination more than I fear it."

"You never told me your name."

Her lips curved into a smirk. Everything about her was exotic, and Sakura could feel herself attracted to the mysterious aura she exuded. "Amina Talman, at your service. I am your new roommate."

Sakura's body stiffened. She hadn't expected that, hadn't thought that they would separate her and Petra. "What about Petra?"

"Oh, she's still in your room, of course. It's just that my three roommates were shipped off to the landfills ––a much better fate than those who failed the entrance exam, if you ask me. So instead of leaving me alone they decided to pair me with the room occupied by our class's two geniuses."

"And you're not intimidated at all?"

"Like I said, there is beauty in determination. I want to become stronger, and you two can help me with that."

Sakura crossed her arms, suddenly wary about Amina's reasons for seeking her assistance. "And you want me and Petra to help you?"

"I thought that was obvious, but yeah, I do. If our instructors decided to rank us tomorrow, I would probably be in the last ten."

The military ranked the Trainee Corps at the end of every year to measure their success and point out where things could be improved. This also happened along the same dates the graduating class chose their branch. The 100th Trainee Corps Class was going to graduate in six months, which meant they still had half a year to go before the rankings.

"Unless you want to join the Military Police, I don't see why that matters too much."

"I want to join the Military Police. It is the only reason why I came here."

Now it was her turn to be incredulous and raise an eyebrow. "Well, it's a good thing that you sought us in the first year. I don't think we would've been able to do much later on. Have you asked Petra if this is alright with her?"

"She said it was fine. I just needed to confirm with you."

Sakura's eyes narrowed and she pouted. "Well, at least I don't have to deal with that old man so much anymore if I'm going to train you."

"I asked Oluo Bozado for help too and he gladly took me in as well."

"You're not very good with negotiations are you? You should've kept that a secret."

"He's one of your two only friends. I might even venture and say he's one of your best friends."

It was very hard for her to keep the horrified expression from her face. "Oh dear, no. Hell no. If anything we're rivals."

"So are you going to help me or what?"

Sakura may have been nice, apparently contrary to popular belief, but even she knew she was being played like a fool by this woman, which was quite weird considering it was _she _who was asking for help, not the other way around. "What do you have for me?"

Amina smirked, as if she had suddenly reeled in the bait. "For starters, a better image. You have no idea how useful it will be once you're in the Military Police to have an approachable image."

Ah, nothing felt nicer than having the upper hand. "You assume I want to join the Military Police. That was your first mistake."

"Who wouldn't? It was a logical assumption," she replied a bit defensively. Though Sakura was quickly growing to dislike Amina, she couldn't tell her to go away, be it because of the banter or the fact she was the first person to approach her willingly in almost four months. Even a girl like her could grow lonely. "I'll be honest, I didn't think you would give me such a hard time with this, especially because your friends already agreed with me."

Sakura sighed and gazed past her to their cabin which acted as a mess hall, where people were already filing out to their dorms. So much for dinner. "I was going to help you, no questions asked, but then you overplayed your hand and thought I had to be manipulated. I don't like being manipulated, and I don't like being used. I guess that was your mistake."

Much to her surprise, Amina looked thoroughly chastised and ashamed. "Perhaps there was some wisdom in my father's words. You are right, and for that I ask for your forgiveness."

"Good, you have it. We start tomorrow at dawn, alright?"

Her dark eyes widened, surprised at the sudden change in her disposition. She smiled tentatively and nodded shyly, a sharp contrast from the sly girl that had approached her not even ten minutes ago. Her eyes lit with something and she reached into a pouch she carried in her back and took out a piece of bread and bottle of water. "Oh, here you go. I forgot I brought these for you."

Sakura took them from her greedily and started munching them, uncaring if she had bread crumbs around her lips and if she drank like a mule. "Say, if you wanted to have the upper hand, you should've just bribed me with food."

"I'll keep that in mind next time I want something," she noted with a giggle.

* * *

><p>Just as Amina had predicted, Sakura had become much more approachable after she decided to tutor her. She was no longer regarded with fear, but rather respect, and this improved her mood greatly. Her pupil, though lacking in the physique department, was very eager, waking up before sunrise to run laps and working on her stamina until dusk. She, Oluo, and Petra usually took turns training Amina, because waking up extra early and going to bed just before curfew was extremely taxing on the body and mind, especially with the normal cadet training they went through.<p>

Sakura had also started depending less on her chakra. In the next six months of training, she gained around fifteen pounds of pure muscle, and though it wasn't very outwardly obvious, Sakura could feel the effects whenever she picked or pushed something without the help of chakra. She was naturally strong, yes, but this was something new, something that was _hers _and hers alone.

That's not to say she neglected her chakra training, because she didn't. As much as she felt uncomfortable having something that naturally made her better than everyone else, her chakra was a part of her and she needed to nurture it, especially since she needed it to protect Mikasa, Eren, or Armin. Her knowledge of chakra was limited –– _very _limited–– because for now she only knew one ninjutsu and that was all she could practice when she was positive she was alone. There were two parts to chakra: the physical and spiritual one. She honed the physical part every day, which made her naturally stronger, but the spiritual part was rather lacking since both her experiences and studies of jutsu were forgotten or gone for good.

The only remedy she figured out was meditation. It wasn't the best, because she was still walking in the dark when it came to meditation, but she felt good after clearing her mind for sometimes even an hour. After a couple of weeks of meditation she noticed that moulding her chakra to enhance some parts of her senses and physique had become simpler and more natural, which encouraged her meditation bouts.

"Hey, Pinky, are you gonna sit there with that stupid look on your face or go to class?"

The level of clear-headedness and peace that had taken her twenty minutes to achieve came crashing down immediately. She opened one green eye to glare icily at Oluo, who was gazing down at her with an annoying smirk.

"Thank you for interrupting my meditation period!"

"You're welcome. Now are you gonna go or do I have to leave you? We're learning about titan killing today."

"Do you have any idea how long it takes me to clear my thoughts?"

"It didn't look like you were very peaceful there, with that frown and all. If anything, I would say you were brooding."

Sakura pouted, peevish that she had been found out. She extended an arm towards Oluo and ordered him to help her up with a single look. He raised his eyebrows, amused at her expression, but hoisted her up without a word. She dusted the dirt from her uniform and he started walking away to where their classes were, leaving Sakura to catch up with him.

"You know, just because you're the best in this class doesn't mean you can't go around skipping class," he commented offhandedly once she was sauntering next to him.

"I wasn't _skipping_, I was mediating. _Big _difference. Besides, since you found me, that means I didn't miss class."

Oluo snorted. "Yeah, _today_, but you're conveniently forgetting all those tardies. Where would you be without Petra and me?"

She grunted but offered no response, because there was nothing she could say to dispute the claim. She was absentminded nowadays, either thinking about her three wards or keeping her nasty nightmares at bay. Her ivory skin was paler than usual, and black bags had recently taken residence under her eyes. She wasn't sure if Petra or Oluo had noticed, but if they had, she was grateful they hadn't asked, because she didn't know how to explain.

They arrived at the class just before their instructor closed the door. Usually, they had another teacher who taught them the history of the three Military Branches and their codes and regulations, but since today they were going tot talk about titan-killing, Emil Ernst had taken over the stage today.

If there was something the cadets hated more than hand-to-hand combat, it was definitely lectures. They had come here to fight for a chance to live within Wall Sina, and some were even here to fight for humanity, but no one was here to learn about the history of the 3DGM unless it had something to do with learning how to _handle _the 3DGM, which was a big, fat no most of the times.

Still, everyone was alert and paying attention for today. This lesson was both important and useful.

"All right, who can tell me how to kill a titan?"

The simple word _titan_ made her involuntarily shiver. She still remembered the utter terror she felt not under its gaze, but because of its chakra. The familiarity was so _wrong _but there at the same time that she had been confused and rendered immobile with just being in their presence.

Sakura thought people's hands were going to shoot up in the air, but surprisingly nobody dared to. It wasn't because they were scared of Emil, though most of the times they were, but everyone looked genuinely confused, as if they hadn't thought about it beforehand.

She remembered the smiling titan, the one that had killed Kalura almost half a year ago. She had punched it in its face and set its head flying a couple of meters. That titan was certainly dead, right? After all, how could a headless titan eat?

"Yes, it was a question many people had when those bastards first appeared. Nothing worked. Not even cutting their fucking heads off."

Nobody, except Petra and Oluo, noticed the pink-haired student stiffen violently. Petra became concerned once her green eyes gained a horrified and enraged edge.

Sakura barely listened to the rest of the lesson. She learned that titans were dependent on the sun and they could only be killed by cutting a special place in their nape, but that was it. So that shit was still alive, eating more humans? She still hadn't avenged Kalura's death? Sakura had been convinced that the smiling fucker was gone for good, but obviously that was not true.

"Sakura," Petra whispered worryingly. "Are you okay?"

She visibly snapped out of her stupor and managed a weak smile towards Petra. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

* * *

><p><em>You had chakra, and you still couldn't save me. You were standing right there, watching, but you didn't do anything. What, too scared to let other people know who you are? Too afraid that we would fear you, condemn you? Well, congratulations, because now I'm dead but at least you got to keep your secret a bit longer, right?<em>

_And to add insult to the injury, you couldn't even _kill _the titan! If my Eren were to die at its hands..._

* * *

><p>The Trainee Corps had three different centers, all located between Wall Sina and Wall Rose now. One of them was near a wide plane, the other by a lake, and the last one by a big mountain. The current 100th Trainee Corps class was in the wide plane, which meant that the 103rd Trainee class would be assigned to the wide plane training area, the most coveted one out of all three.<p>

The least wanted area would be the one near the mountains, which was the 102nd Trainee Class's home. Their instructors would make them run up and down the mountain every Sunday. Though they had been doing this for nearly eight months, it still made everyone detest Sundays, even if they had the rest of the day off to do as they pleased.

Sakura's calves and thighs were burning, but she carried on. Amina was jogging next to her, panting and shivering from the brutal cold, but she refused to be anywhere but next to her. Petra and Oluo, on the other hand, were bickering ahead, something about cheating in an artillery test. It made her wonder why people considered Oluo to be their friend when they were only constantly fighting.

A pair of long pink strands stuck in her sweaty face and she pulled them back with an annoyed grunt, only to have them hit against her cheeks with each step she took. "That's it. I'm cutting my hair."

Amina replied with a skeptical voice, "You're cutting your hair? _You_?"

Sakura turned and glared at her slightly. "What?" she barked. "You doubt me?"

Her demeanor scared a few people around her and they either sped up or slowed down. Amina, on the other hand, was quite nonchalant about it. "It's just hard to believe. I wouldn't be surprised if you had a shrine dedicated to your hair hidden somewhere in our room."

"I don't _worship _my hair. I just like it."

"You adore your hair, and you're thinking about cutting it."

"It's annoying and it has gotten too long. For giving me second thoughts you're gonna help me out now."

Amina _tsked_ and glared at her slightly. "Ha! As if. You would cut me into tiny pieces if I so much as cut an extra centimeter."

"Well, more of a reason to be cautious, right?"

The rest of their jog was silent, which was good because they were going through the most beautiful part of the mountain, especially now that it was the beginning of summer and the trees looked healthy. Running in the mountain had been torturous, especially when there had been a snowstorm the day before.

Their mess hall cabin had never felt so delicious before. Sakura sat down with Petra, Amina, Oluo, and Oluo's black-haired roommate Jett Kaiser, as usual, and they chowed down their lunch without a word. Now that she thought about it, nobody was talking, probably too tired and hungry to even make an attempt at a conversation.

"Hey, Jett, want to practice after this?" Petra asked hopefully, breaking the comfortable silence. She was so intent on gauging Jett's expression that she missed how Oluo's eyes narrowed menacingly at his food.

He raised a dark eyebrow, as if asking _are you kidding me?_ "Where do you get all this energy from, Petra? We just finished running up and down a damn mountain."

"There's always time for practice, especially with rankings coming up in a month."

The subject aggravated most of the people in the surrounding tables, because nobody was looking forward to their exams. Sure, low-marks did not mean that they would be shipped off, but if an instructor decided that they weren't fit to continue then they were going to be seeing a landfill for the rest of their lives. And of course the ones sitting on the table, with the exception of Amina, were the least worried about the test considering their talent.

"Sakura is getting a haircut. Don't you want to help out?" Amina asked, hoping to divert Petra from the topic.

The brown-haired girl ––who now looked older than her so she should really stop referring to her as a girl–– grabbed her by the shoulders and started pushing and pulling her. "You're cutting your hair?" she exclaimed. Luckily most of the mess hall were now holding various conversations, which meant that the comment had not been as loud as Sakura heard it.

"Yeah," she replied with a twitch.

"Ooh, I want to help! Sorry, Jett, maybe another time!"

"I didn't even agree in the first place..."

The minute Sakura finished her soup Petra grabbed her by the arm and started pulling her away. She called Amina to help her out, and both Sakura and her knew better than to protest their mother-hen friend. She borrowed a pair of scissors from the room next to them and boasted about her hair cutting techniques because her grandfather had been one of the best barbers in Honig.

"Oh, I'll leave your hair absolutely wonderful! But first, we'll take a bath and then come back."

What Sakura thought would be a horrible afternoon soon became one filled with laughter and jokes. Petra told a story on how one time she spilled cranberry juice on her skirt and had to hide it from everyone or else they would've thought it was period blood. Amina then related how she had cried to her mother for an hour because of her period because she thought she was pregnant and she wanted a little sister, not a daughter.

So much talk about menstruation led her thoughts back to Mikasa. She would be eleven now, a normal age for a girl to get her period. Sakura imagined how scared and traumatized she would be, apparently bleeding from a place she wasn't supposed to be bleeding without a single explanation. Every girl received the talk about her monthly cycle. Sakura got it from Mikoto, but Mikasa had no female comfort.

Petra was halfway done with her cutting her hair and talking about an embarrassing crush she had when she was ten when a loud knock interrupted their talk. Amina, being the least occupied, stood up from their little circle and went to open the door, revealing a courier with a gentle, old face. He handed Amina a single letter, tipped his hat a little, and left without a word.

"This is for you," Amina said with a small frown, handing Sakura the letter with her name and address written in the front. The handwriting was eerily similar, but in the end unrecognizable._  
><em>

Sakura unfolded the paper and a wide smile spread across her face when she realized it was Mikasa's handwriting.

"Who is it?"

"My sister," she breathed back.

"Oh... Um... Should we..."

"I could read it out loud, if you would like."

Both Amina and Petra gazed at her curiously. "You would do that?"

Sakura shrugged and her smile widened, as if that was possible. "I trust you both."

"Thank you... We would like to listen."

She cleared her throat and began, "Dear Sakura, we finally found someone who was able to take this letter to you. Eren, Armin, and I are stationed in the fields right now, growing crops. The work is hard, but they give us food and a place to sleep, which is more than most people get so for that we're grateful. Armin's grandfather along with most of the people were sent to retake Wall Maria just a month ago, and we know that you would've been there since anyone older than eighteen was ordered to go. It's also a good thing that you applied last year, because now the cutoff age for the military this summer is twenty, so you wouldn't have made it.

"I have been looking after Armin and Eren as much as I could, but it's hard. So thank you for looking after us. We miss you a lot, but we know this is necessary. Eren still says that we're going to see you next year because we're going to join the Trainee Corps, but I'm still not sure yet. I do know that I don't want to continue working in the farms.

"We don't know when this letter will reach you, but just in case, happy birthday. We promise to give you an extra big hug... next time we see you. Love, Mikasa, Eren, and Armin..."

The only sound in the room was the _click _of the scissors, because Sakura was definitely _not _crying.

* * *

><p><em>Have you ever thought that most of the things that happened are your fault? They are. Helsa takes you in and is murdered. We take you in, and my parents are murdered. The Jaegers take you in, and look what has become of Eren. Look where we are now, working to death in a field. See the pattern? Good, because you're not the only one that notices things. You call yourself a <em>iryo-nin_, but how many lives have you saved? A _kunoichi, _yes? But how many lives have you taken to protect us?_

_We're next, and like always, you're going to be the one to survive.  
><em>

_Some kind of winner you are._

* * *

><p><strong>The italicized section were Sakura's nightmares, from the POV of three different characters: Bertha, Kalura, and Mikasa. In her nightmares they were speaking directly to her, but no, they never actually had these conversations. This is different from the italicized section in the first chapter because then it was centered, this one has the same outline as the rest of the chapter. There's a reason for that. <strong>

**I had to go on a bit of a scavenger hunt for Oluo and Petra's beginnings. So far, the only thing I could find was that Oluo's age in the manga was 19 (yes, I know, very shocking) and that they weren't in the Survey Corps when the Colossal Titan broke down Wall Maria in 845. But since they were in the Special Operations Squad, that meant they had a bit of experience which is why I lumped them in the 102nd Trainee Class. Also I upped their ages a bit because why not.**

**This chapter was certainly more on the angsty side, but it also had its bright side, kinda like life, eh? Besides, it's really not SnK without a dose of angst and three drops of vengeance. Things don't get any brighter from here though. Also, for now I'll take a break from the SnK plot and develop characters and the setting bit more. Even when we hit the original plot, I still won't stick closely to it, because it's boring to just quote lines or scenes from the manga/anime.**

**My innumerable thanks to OnePiecefan202, Basia Orci, RefleR, slw923, LadyRidger, deedee2034, catxangel, Latin Gardenia, pepergirl001, Atsirk Enoh, DragFire, Arisu-kun, mun3litKnight, ,brokenmaelstrom, foraslanthelion, necrofantasia, bum reviews, animagirl, PinKrystal, Guest, and DarkKoi for taking some time out of their days and reviewing. Thank you to those who added this story to their alerts as well. ****And to answer your question, RefleR, because I want to and can. But don't worry, because though it will play a role in the future, that is not the main focus of this story, at all.**

**Reviews make me happy.**

**Penpal**


	5. Fake

Reading guide for this chapter:

"Normal Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"**_Jutsu"_**_

_"_**Emphasis."**

* * *

><p>She was ready for the final test that would determine their rankings for their second year. After all, even last year when she had been horribly sick the day testing took place ––to the point that she could barely breathe because her nose was stuffed and she couldn't balance because she kept sneezing all the time–– she had managed to place fourth, just below Oluo and Petra and one spot above Jett.<p>

This year, though, things were going to be different. It was now second nature to be up in the air with her 3DMG and she had greater strength and stamina than most of the cadets, bar some buffer male trainees. Her swordsmanship had improved from holding the swords awkwardly (though it had felt just _right _if only the blades were a bit shorter and throwable) to having a graceful form even midair.

The last test exercise was simple: land as many hits as possible in the wooden titan course. At the moment, it didn't matter where, even if the spot usually killed a regular cadet, because they were practicing how to successfully mix the 3DMG with attacking. It was uncomfortable, slashing anything meanwhile they were almost ten meters above ground and being held only by two wires. It was a combination of trust and instinct, something many lacked.

Oluo was currently up, using every single tree to his advantage and moving from titan to titan with astonishing speed. If there was anybody who made a suitable rival in her class, it was definitely Oluo. His form, strength, and ambition evenly matched hers. Sakura had begrudgingly admitted a few months ago that maybe they were friends, much to Jett and Petra's delight, and Amina's amusement.

In the end, he landed a grand total of fourteen hits out of twenty possible, the class record. Emil nodded gruffly towards Oluo and wrote something on a notepad, most likely a commentary of the performance as well as the grade. Now that they were second-years, it would include a comparison to last year's test as well as possible areas to improve on.

He walked smugly back to her, a stupid smirk plastered on his face. Sakura and the rest of the Trainees Corps Class were already used to his cocky demeanor, and there was nothing anyone could do about it other than resent him for it because he was _that _good.

"Did you see that? Oh, of course you did. Who didn't?" Petra smacked him in the back of the head and scowled at him when he yelped. "Ow! Petra! What was that for?"

"What have we said about humility?"

"That it's for the talentless? Ow! Stop it!"

Emil had decided to change things up and go from descending to ascending order based on last names. He called another cadet, who gave an impressive performance, and another, who only managed to land three hits, and another cadet, who lost a blade mid-flight, _and _Oluo and Petra still kept bickering. It got to the point that both Jett and her teamed up to attract their attention, but it still didn't work. Sakura was about to smack them both in the head when she heard her last name coming from Emil.

_That _shut them up. In fact, there was a pervasive silence spread throughout the Trainees Corps Class. Everyone knew she was socially distant because she trained heavily, though the reason was a mystery because she had not expressed a keen desire in joining the Military Police. She barely had time for relationships and only confided in her roommates, Amina and Petra. Things had changed after the first year, though. Her eyes had become a bit lighter and she seemed to smile more often, which made her more amiable to the crowd, but her closest friends just grew more worried as her demeanor became brighter.

She sent a hook to a tree and landed gently in a giant branch next to Emil Ernst. "Land as many hits as you can. If you miss a titan, you can't go back, so I suggest you be careful about things."

Sakura nodded firmly and analyzed her surroundings, looking for the nearest titan. Emil blew the whistle, leaving her sensitive ears ringing, and she aimed her grappling hook to a tree a couple of meters away and was off.

It started out somewhat shaky. The experience was different, because she was used to fighting in the ground her whole life. Being up in the air was _too _much freedom. She missed hitting the first titan, and she barely managed to land a hit on the second one, only to be so distracted that she almost crashed into the other one. Sakura cursed under her breath in her native tongue and hastily attempted to regain her balance at the expense of hitting the fourth one.

She could almost _feel _Oluo's smug grin.

Her grip on the handles tightened and she grit her teeth. She had hit one and missed three, not good considering that Oluo had missed all of his in the last five. If he beat her in this test, he would take the number one spot and remind her that she wasn't ready yet, wasn't strong enough to protect Mikasa, Eren, and Armin by herself. Chakra was _very _useful, yes, but when fighting titans, she _needed _the 3DMG and blades to slice the nape quickly and efficiently. Punching things solved half her problems; hacking solved the other.

After slashing a tendon, she went up a couple of feet and started landing hits on the arms and torsos of the ten-meter classes but unfortunately missed two when she gained height in between titans, upping her count to eleven hits and five misses. At this point she couldn't miss another titan if she wanted to beat Oluo and steal first place from the previous year's valedictorian, a twenty-two-year-old named Lars Kristof, who wasn't going to be valedictorian this year from their performance.

She landed a hit on its forehead but missed the sudden switch from ten-meter to four meter class and couldn't even nick the wood. Her stomach filled with dread and she cursed in Japanese. Had Eren been in its clutches, he would've been eaten. Not only that, but these wooden titans didn't move at all... This was nothing compared to the real world, and she was failing.

She broke two blades with the next titan, mostly because of her chakra-enhanced strength that had seeped through in her failure to control her anger and frustration. She sent her hook to a tree trunk and added the blades to the handles while she balanced herself on the trunk. There was one titan left that she had to hit in order to tie with Oluo. Her time was around his, since both had sped through the course at the expense of accuracy, but there was only something that she could do and that was to show better mastery of her swordsmanship skills than Oluo.

Stopping had broken her tempo, but at least she could calculate how high she would need to go in order to hit the nape of that twelve-meter class. She calculated how high she needed to go and sent her grappling hook to a tree around ten meters away and released the gas in her 3DMG, speeding towards the titan faster than usual to make up for lost time.

It was only when she was a couple of meters away that she realized she miscalculated how high she needed to be and was over by just half a meter, but far away enough that her blades would definitely miss the target.

Her chakra got the better of her and suddenly she wanted to try something new. There were no repercussions in the secret department, since Emil Ernst was keeping his distance and her classmates were many kilometers away. She retrieved the wires from the tree they were attached to and she was falling, but she still wasn't going to be able to hit the wooden titan. But what her mind didn't remember her body sure did, because she slashed the blade midair and a gust of wind was released from a blade in a neat arc that hit the nape of the titan a bit shallowly, surely not enough to kill it, but the wind had nicked it enough to make it seem as if she had narrowly hit it.

She released the grappling hook to another tree and released gas to speed towards it, landing on a branch gently. Sakura released a deep breath she hadn't realized she had been holding in and stared at her left-hand sword, bewildered. So not only did she shoot torrents of water from her mouth, but she could also release wind from her blades? Just what the hell could she do?

"_**Shinkuken.**" _That was the name of the technique she had used, even if she wasn't completely sure of how she knew the technique or where it had come from, but her arms and her chakra remembered releasing it various times. She grit her teeth and clenched her hands around the grip of her swords; so if her body remembered, why couldn't she?

"Ackerman!"

Emil Ernst's voice snapped her from her musings and she resisted the urge to smack her forehead. She was supposed to come back, yeah, to mark the end of the training. Now Emil would think she had taken longer and cheated, and that wasn't good at all.

He landed lightly next to her and eyed the titan critically, and then his eyes widened. "I saw that wild move you did but didn't think you managed to hit the titan. Then you disappeared and I thought the worst."

Sakura wiped her brow, eyeing her sweat with a little distaste. "I am fine, sir."

Emil studied her intensely. "You hit it in the nape. Granted, you need two slashes to kill one of these fuckers, but still... We haven't practiced that. You have impressed me. Good job, Ackerman."

That was the first "good job" anyone received from Emil Ernst, and she felt incredibly guilty that she only received it with the help of her chakra.

But she would be lying if she said she would refrain from honing that skill. Who knows, it might be useful one day when she was alone and one of those ugly shits was in the way between her and her survival.

* * *

><p>Petra slammed the her clothes trunk and sat on it, heaving a long sigh. The eighteen-year-old stared at her pink-haired roommate, who was sprawled in her bed rereading the letter her sister had sent her for like the eighth time. It was only when she was reading one of Mikasa's letters that Petra saw Sakura smile in true happiness, as if she was transported to a better, happier world.<p>

"I think I'm going to visit them," Sakura suddenly declared, sitting up and looking down from her topmost bunk bed. "I couldn't go last time because I didn't have any money, but I saved some from all the work I did last summer and I think I have enough to buy my way into a cart."

Petra frowned. "I thought you relaxed last summer."

Sakura smiled sheepishly and shrugged, though she didn't seem embarrassed from lying to her about what she did last summer. Petra had invited her to spend her time with her and her dad in their home in Honig. Her father had been looking forward to meeting the famous Sakura, from whom he had heard nothing but good things in Petra's letters. She had declined, stating that the year had burned her out and she wanted to do nothing but unwind, but she obviously hadn't done that, and she apparently didn't feel remorse for lying to her.

She had to admit she felt a little hurt and betrayed but she pushed it down, thinking about all the good things Sakura had done compared to the bad ones. Besides, it's not like she had done anything bad; she had done something quite noble, in a way. But the hurt mostly came from the lie. Why had she kept the truth from her, especially when it was something as selfless as that?

"I still think it's a bit dangerous to buy a trip from a stranger."

Sakura raised a pink eyebrow at her. "I'm not exactly someone you can easily take advantage of."

Petra resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She hated it when she got like this. "Sakura, we have one month off. Why don't you come with me to Honig, we get you a horse all for yourself, you come back to Honig with the horse, and we return back to camp together? It's much safer that way."

The twenty-one-year-old frowned, her eyes pensive. Petra knew she had given her a good offer, especially when she mentioned giving Sakura a horse all for herself. That was a luxury not many had, but the independence was desired by almost everyone. The class's valedictorian needed it the most considering the farm her siblings were located in was far ways off from the nearest city of commerce, where those carts usually dropped travelers. She would either need to hitch another ride or, worse, walk all the way to the farm.

"Sounds good, but why are you so into making me come with you to Honig?"

"Is it so wrong that I want to take my best friend along with me to my hometown?"

Sakura recoiled and blinked slightly, her gaze bewildered. "You consider me your best friend?"

Now Petra really did roll her eyes. She glared at her and crossed her arms, suddenly irritated. "Seriously? You're asking me that after spending two years in this hell? What's wrong with you?"

She blushed slightly and looked down, a bit ashamed. "I'm sorry... I just didn't think––"

"Stop thinking and start feeling." Sakura snapped her head towards her, confused and at the same time fascinated. Petra added a bit hesitantly, "Not everyone in this world is against you."

Her mouth opened slightly and she swallowed a lump that had formed in her throat. The pink-haired woman looked away, ending the conversation, and Petra stood up and finished packing her things to her other smaller trunk.

"I'll go with you," she whispered.

Petra twirled towards her and was surprised to see slightly teary eyes. Knowing better than to question anything, she smiled warmly and softly said, "That's the right answer."

* * *

><p>The ride to Honig had only taken a day, since their training camp was located in the center between Maria and Sina. Summer was nice, not too cold but not too hot, the perfect temperature. That combined with the beautiful mountains made the ride one of the most relaxed, beautiful journeys Sakura had ever embarked in, and she had had many compared to the average citizen, though perhaps not for the best reasons: she had traveled from the Ackermans' home to the Jaegers', then to the refugee place and finally to the 102nd Trainee Corps camp.<p>

They entered the city, and it was just like how Petra described and more. There was a very noticeable _stench _which occurred when too many people lived too close together, but other than that the city was bustling with more energy than even Shiganshina. The overall demeanor was a bit rougher, if the expressions on the citizens were anything, but it was definitely understandable, considering what happened two years ago.

"Ah, it's good to be back," Petra murmured contentedly.

"Why do you say so?"

"My dad is moving to the Karanase District this year. He says business is better there, but I'm not too sure."

Something was bothering Sakura, and she decided to ask before she said something wrong later on. "Um, Petra...Why don't you talk about your mother?"

Her amber eyes saddened a bit and she smiled sadly. "She died ten years ago from an illness... I don't like being reminded of that."

"Oh." She remembered Helsa, Mikoto, and Kalura, all of them with their special warmth and legacies that had been passed on to her. They entrusted her with so much in such a short time frame, something that made them _mothers_ to her in their own way. "Losing a mother is always hard."

Petra looked at her sympathetically. "You lost your mom too?"

Sakura nodded, refraining from telling her exactly how many times. "But we shouldn't talk too much about that. We're visiting your dad, right? It's a happy occasion!"

She looked momentarily surprised but then she smiled widely and nodded along with her. Just then the cart came to a stop and the driver told them they reached their destination. Petra thanked him and paid him his money and they were soon on the way, Petra roaming the streets with expertise and Sakura following behind helplessly.

The eighteen-year-old stopped in front of a nice, well-kept home that reminded her a lot of the Jaegers' home, making her assume that Petra's barber shop made more than what she had previously let her know.

Petra knocked a couple of times and waited impatiently for her dad to open the door. The door opened slowly and revealed a man that was quickly tackled by his overly-excited daughter. The man laughed heartily and lifted off her feet with a bit too much effort.

"Oh, wow, Petra! You sure have gotten heavy!"

"Dad!"

Mr. Ral put his daughter down and looked at Sakura for a second before offering her a warm smile and an extended hand, which she eagerly took. He had his daughter's honeyed hair and light blue eyes, meaning Petra had her mother's eyes. His forehead and the corners of his mouth had wrinkles, possibly betraying his youthfulness.

"Hello, you must be Sakura, correct? My name is Philip Ral, very pleased to meet Petra's dear friend."

Sakura let his hand go and smiled warmly at the older man. "The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Ral."

"Oh, please, you kids calling me Mr. Ral sure makes me feel old. Please, call me Philipp."

"Very well, Mr. Philipp."

Petra and her father shared a look at her stubbornness but they only shrugged and later laughed. Even though Sakura was the source of their mirth, she felt absolutely happy with it, glad to have been included so easily and naturally into their routine.

They were just in time for dinner, and Philipp cooked for them one of the most delicious steaks she had ever tasted, which were few but still, it was very good. Philipp asked about how things had gone this year and Petra boasted about her fourth rank and Sakura meekly admitted that she had placed first. The dinner was jovial, since they shared countless stories of their time in camp and of their friends, particularly Oluo. Petra whined about how much he had to baby him and Sakura complained about his cockiness, but they both grudgingly admitted he was one of their closest friends.

The house only had two rooms, which meant that Sakura and Petra had to share room, much to their _distaste_. With the knowledge that they didn't have to wake up at the crack of dawn's ass, the girls spent the whole night giggling and talking about silly things. Petra admitted her crush towards Jett and Sakura replied in a deadpan that she had known for a _long _time and that Petra did a shitty job hiding it.

To say Petra was mortified was an understatement, but the night overall was very enjoyable and Sakura had never felt so free and relaxed before in her life. Maybe she should've let Petra in much earlier to save herself much of last year's grief.

* * *

><p>"Are you sure you know where you're going?"<p>

Sakura gave her an exasperated look. "Yes, _Mom_, I checked like ten times and confirmed the existence of the farm."

Petra raised her hands in a placating manner. "All right, all right, I just wanted to make sure you didn't get lost. It'll take you like two days to get there, but you should be fine."

"I'll be back in two weeks, hopefully. Even if I'm not back you go on ahead, okay?"

"Saying that doesn't really assuage my worries."

"Oh, wow, look at you using big words."

"Shut up and stop trying to distract me, Sakura! It's not working."

Sakura laughed and her horse whinnied loudly and started moving around. "Ho, ho. You sure this animal won't just drop me?"

Petra glared at her and harrumphed. "You're the one that rented her."

Her clutch on the reins tightened and she nodded in agreement. "True, true. Well, I better be off if I want to make it halfway by dusk. See you later, Petra!"

"Good luck and I hope you have a safe trip!"

"Thanks!"

The kunoichi nudged the horse's sides with her foot and the horse was off. She had to admit it had taken her a couple of days to get used to riding, but both Philipp and Petra were good teachers and she had gotten the hang of it. Sure, she couldn't do anything but stay on top of the horse and she could remain balanced even with a harsh trot, but that was it.

Regardless of her mild incapability to ride, her horse was powerful and good. She sure needed to thank the Rals when she came back for giving her such a beauty and finding her at such an affordable price. Not only that, but Petra had lent her some riding clothes, because there was no way in hell she was riding with a skirt. Thus she had been given a pair of pants and boots, a long-sleeved shirt and a cloak just in case it rained. She had two sets of clothes and a pair of pajamas in her bag along with the presents she brought Eren, Mikasa, and Armin.

She bought them with the leftover money she had, and now she wasn't sure she had enough to pay for food for the next two weeks, but she wasn't too worried about that. She couldn't help but be excited to give Eren one of the Survey Corps cloaks she had borrowed –– read, _stolen–– _from one of the training camps leftover clothes. She bought Armin a book about exploration which would've been worth a fortune had it not been talking about exploring the _outside _world. It was in the banned book sections in one of the bookstores, and people had eyed her suspiciously for buying it, but she couldn't care less because Armin would be happy to receive this.

Mikasa's gift had been difficult, which brought upon a bout of nostalgia considering she had been in this position around four years ago. In the end she had decided to buy her a plain necklace with a simple oval pendant but asked a seasoned blacksmith to inscribe the kanji for her name on it and the kanji for her mother's name in the back. She wanted to complete the present by buying her three bamboo hats, her namesake, but unfortunately bamboo apparently didn't exist anywhere near them. However, she still contended the necklace would brighten her enough, even if Eren's red scarf hid it.

The more Sakura rode, the more experience she gained from it. There was a point when the horse surpassed her chakra-enhanced speed, which was quite the feat. However they had to rest a lot and the horse was very demanding of water, but she had a good reason considering they were riding hard.

Sakura stopped in a small town which barely had two hundred people. The perk of stopping in such a desolate town was that the inn was dirt cheap, even if the service wasn't great. Still, Sakura couldn't really complain considering she had a bed and had breakfast guaranteed and that was all she needed.

She was about to fall asleep when she heard the frantic neighs of her horse outside. Sakura thanked her laziness for not switching into her pajamas and hurriedly put on her boots, scampering outside to make sure her partner was fine.

The kunoichi groaned when she saw three men trying to steal her horse. She should've seen it coming, she really should've been more aware of the dangers of journeying, but she had been lulled into a false sense of security because of this rundown town. Maybe that's how they made ends meet, by stealing from the odd traveler that came their way. Her pride as a kunoichi was wounded, and she had to see the situation rectified.

Sakura cleared her throat and the three men stopped at their tracks. "You have a lot of gall trying to steal from a sleeping person."

"Look, girl, just go back to your room and we promise to not kill you."

She snorted, thinking it was cute that these men were threatening her. "Look, I'm feeling merciful today. Leave right now and I won't pursue you."

Her enhanced eyesight allowed her to see one of the men take out a firearm and aim at her. "Look, bitch, our patience is running so unless you want to have your brains plastered on the wall, I suggest you let us go."

"Your first incorrect assumption was that you would get to fire."

Before even waiting for their reply she launched herself at them, using chakra to amplify her speed. The men stood no chance against her and she quickly disarmed them, perhaps throwing a mild kick or punch here and there that left them incapacitated. They let the horse go and she sped away, quickly leaving the small town and her master. Sakura scowled at her coward horse and promised to give her quite the talk once she found her.

Four more chakra signatures got nearer to her and she realized a bit too late that she was surrounded from both sides. Two men closed in from one side of the road and the other two from the side where her horse had escaped to. The bandits she had taken down where groaning on the floor, one of them clutching his privates. The other four accomplices wordlessly aimed their firearms at her.

They started shooting at her, but they only shot at a puff of smoke. Sakura's body flicker technique had been a bit rusty the first time she used it, but training so many times in the mountain by the camp had honed her skills to the point that it looked as if she teleported to another place. She was now on the roofs, staring at the men as her mind formulated a plan. She herself was in no particular danger, but that didn't mean the townspeople weren't. Even if she had her suspicions that the town itself was behind the robbery, she still didn't want to be wrong and unnecessarily cause someone's death.

However, she wasn't fast enough to disarm both sides of bandits, since they were very far away from each other and although she could take care of that issue by simply killing them, she didn't want to spill any blood that night.

_Bird_... her body whispered and her hands unwillingly made the seals. _Hare... Horse... _She body flickered behind the bandits by the town's exit and completed the hand seals with _Ram_. "_**Futon: Kyoryokuna Fuha.**" _She breathed in and expelled a great gust of wind from her mouth, blowing the bandits and making them crash on the ground several meters away. It would take them several minutes to recover from such a crippling hit, and by then they might be in shackles and she very far away.

She gathered her things from her room and set out in search of her mode of transportation. Looking for the chakra signature of a specific animal was hard, but looking for the chakra of a specific species wasn't; for example, flies didn't have the same amount of chakra as horses did. Since not many horses wandered around in the wilderness at these hours of the night, it was very easy to spot her white mare grazing in a nearby field.

She approached her slowly lest she scare her. Luckily the mare seemed to remember her, because she didn't bolt or try to attack her. Sakura sighed and started running her fingers through her mane, trying to calm her down. "_What a troublesome night, right?" _she spoke to her softly in her native tongue. "_I don't get to speak this language very often anymore... In fact, there are times I catch myself thinking in German and I don't have to translate what I have to say in my mind. It should make me happy, but for some reason I think that I'm getting farther away from who I am... No, who I _**used** _be. Is that bad?_"

She chuckled softly to herself and started patting the rest of her body. "_Ah, and here I am, talking to a horse. You know, I thought I wasn't going to name you because I wasn't going to see you very often, but I've grown fond of you. And since I am speaking to you in my native tongue, it's only fitting that I name you in Japanese, right? Well, you're mostly white, though you have some dirt here and there, but you're still mostly white. So I guess I'll call you White from now on, okay? I guess I'm no better than Oluo and that brat I saved in Beinn."_

Shiro's heartbeat started slowing down after Sakura's ministrations and she relaxed enough to allow her to mount her again. Getting on Shiro was hard to do in public, mostly because she was _almost _five-foot-two, but out here in the wild she had no qualms about using chakra as a little boost. She nudged Shiro to start walking and luckily she obeyed, albeit a bit slowly. It was okay, though; she was in no rush at the moment.

She had paid a grand total of three gold coins for the dinner, stay, and breakfast at the inn, and she only had the dinner. It aggravated her greatly that she had spent so much money and hadn't even reaped all the benefits. Still, she couldn't have stayed. Luckily it was dark enough for the bandits to miss the color of her hair, but they might recognize her voice, and she didn't feel like becoming a scapegoat for humanity just yet.

Her mare's speed continued slowing down, something Sakura had predicted considering they had ridden for almost ten hours. However, she had to be picky with the area she chose, because if a town was dangerous, there's no saying how risky being out in the open was.

"_You know, one of the ninja arts is the Illusionary Techniques. If I could only remember one, I'm sure I wouldn't be so worried. Maybe it's because I didn't know one before I lost my memory? But that's weird, since I have good chakra control and I know Illusionary Techniques require good chakra control. Maybe I ran out of 'You Get A Free Jutsu' cards for the month, eh? Oh, well, look at that, there's a hill over there. We can rest at the bottom, since it's a bit far away from the road. Come, White!"_

The hill was small, which was a small blessing because she wasn't sure she would be able to handle riding a horse down a mount or anything bigger than that. She got off from Shiro and started relaxing her again, coating her fingertips with a bit of chakra to make the desired effect faster. In a couple of minutes the mare relaxed fully and dropped to the ground, falling asleep shortly afterwards. Sakura couldn't contain her drowsiness any longer and laid her head against Shiro's belly and descended into a light sleep.

* * *

><p><em>"How do you get animals to like you so much."<em>

_"I don't understand the question. Animals love you."_

_"Well, yeah, but that was only after Kurama let me sign the contract with the kitsune that animals started paying attention to me. It took _two _contracts for them to like me that much."_

_"Well, there's your answer."_

_"What?! Sakura-chan? When––"_

_"Come on, Shishou wanted to see us, Naru––"_

* * *

><p>She was cranky and tired, but there was no one to blame for her state except the thugs that had made her flee the town. There were times when she wanted to get off Shiro and start punching the earth, but since she was so close to her destination, she didn't really want to put her identity in danger. Besides, she was making record time considering she barely slept at all and only waited for her mare to recover her strength, trying to remember what she had dreamt about in the meantime. They had been on their way before sunrise.<p>

The map the Rals had given her was a bit old, but she found her way again after asking a passerby tinker. Apparently she was only thirty minutes away, and that was great because she had missed breakfast. Her stomach was growling and Shiro's pace was slowing down, no doubt hungry and tired from the arduous work she had put her through.

"_Don't worry, White. We'll be there soon and I promise to give you half my food for being such a good girl."_

They reached the farm in forty minutes, but she was only happy to see that the place existed to begin with. People were working on the fields intensively, ploughing the land or watering new crops or checking how the vegetables were growing. These farms provided food for most of the residents inside Wall Rose as well as the cadets. Sakura felt immensely grateful for them, because if it weren't for their hard work,, she might not have a warm stew waiting for her at the cabin after a hard day of work.

An short woman approached her. Her dark eyes were wary and her face was marred by harsh lines, no doubt scars from age. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to visit my siblings."

"No visitors in working hours. We can't afford distractions."

She glared at the woman, and Sakura was inwardly happy to be mounted on a horse because it made her much more intimidating. "Look, I rode her for almost two days straight and I want to see my siblings. I'm not in a good mood, I didn't get much sleep, and it will make me feel **much** better if I get to talk to them. I don't want to be mad."_  
><em>

"Still, no distractions. So unless you work here on your stay, I don't see why I should let you see your siblings."

"Feed me and my horse and I'll work here for as long as I can."

The woman raised her eyebrows and then pointed at Shiro. "How much does it eat?"

"Two humans' worth."

"Then your work better be worth three persons' or this deal won't work."

Sakura raised her head haughtily and smirked slowly at the woman. "I'm worth more than that."

The woman scoffed but Sakura knew she had taken the bait. "Well if you're lying I'll just kick you both out. The stable is that way and you'll find tools in that big house over there. You can search for your siblings afterwards."

The pink-haired girl nodded and rode Shiro to the stable. Most of the horses there were old and thin, a sharp contrast of the strong mare that had carried her for two days. She dismounted once she reached the entrance of the building and led Shiro to an empty stall near the end. She grabbed the bag with presents and removed the saddle, throwing it outside of the stall, where it wasn't so dirty. Then she gathered the hay and filled the bucket with water, and Shiro paid attention to Sakura no longer.

She chuckled. "You sure are hungry, right? I'll come check on you tonight. Be good." She closed the stall door and left, glad to be away from the awful smell of horse poop.

If she hadn't spent two years with the Ackermans' she would've been clueless as to what to do with the tools in the storage house. She just grabbed a hoe and left, because it wasn't as if she was going to do any work at the moment anyway.

Even though she had memorized their chakra signature, it was a bit hard to pinpoint their exact location when they were so close and so many people where gathered around. She knew they were close by, though, and it wouldn't take long for them to spot her with her pink hair. Still, she wanted to surprise them, because she hadn't let them know she was coming, and the only way to do that was to remain hidden.

It wasn't hard for a kunoichi to remain hidden.

Most of the kids were working on seeding the fields, simply because it was an important work that didn't require much muscle. She spotted them almost immediately, and she was glad to see them together even after all this time. They were engrossed in their work, which was excellent since it allowed her to sneak behind them without the use of any of her kunoichi abilities.

"Oh, wow, in a year or two you're going to be taller than me." The three children stiffened immediately and Sakura repressed a giggle. "Except you, Armin. It might take you a bit longer but I'm sure you'll get there."

The three turned around and stared at the kunoichi, wide-eyed and open-mouthed, and now Sakura did burst out laughing. The kids snapped out of their stupor and tackled her immediately, Armin hugging her left side, Eren her right, and Mikasa the front. Her chuckles were warm and she ruffled their heads affectionately, especially Armin's, who was now much more comfortable in her presence.

"We didn't know you were coming," Mikasa whispered, her face still buried in the crook of her neck.

Sakura placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "That was the point of the surprise, dear sister. Now let's get out of here and lead me to your rooms. I have things for you."

Sneaking from their work wasn't hard, considering the sheer amount of people in the fields. Sakura had expected them to protest, but she was glad her wards appreciated her more than labor.

All the children shared the same quarters, meanwhile men and women had different dormitories. Sakura suspected she would be lumped with the adults, but she had her ways of escaping undetected. After all, she worked all last summer and traveled with little sleep for almost two days just so that she could spend some measly days with her dependents.

She sat at the edge of Eren's small bed and the other three crowded around her, eagerly waiting for her next to move. "Before we continue, I have gifts for you three." Sakura reached into her bag and got out an old book, which Armin almost snatched from her hands, much to her amusement. He opened to book immediately and started scanning the pages, his eyes gaining a new light at the pictures. "I don't know how true those are, and don't ask me about the validity because I don't know who the author is, but––"

"It's awesome, Sakura," Armin interrupted in an awed voice. His normally cautious blue eyes were bursting with happiness. "Thank you so much."

"You're very welcome." She got out the Survey Corps cloak and handed it to Eren. He took it from her slowly, reverently, and admired the Wings of Freedom in the back. "Say it's from a deceased family member because I stole it."

Eren grinned at her and immediately put on the cloak, flourishing it dramatically for them to see. It pained Sakura to say it, but the Wings of Freedom suited him, as much as she wanted to keep him safe inside the walls. "This is the best gift, Sakura. Even when I get my own, I won't replace this one."

She grinned and searched for the last present. It took a bit of rummaging around because the necklace was small, but once she felt the cool metal she quickly grasped it and handed it to her surrogate sister. Mikasa traced the kanji lines, as if familiarizing herself with them again. "Mikasa," she whispered, her gray eyes widening and her mouth forming a small smile at the detail.

"Look at the back."

The girl turned the necklace around and studied the kanji. "Life...? No... **Mikoto**... You missed something, though. _Cherry blossom._"

Sakura's eyes softened and her heart clenched slightly. She thought the kids were going to resent her for being away from them so long, for not fully carrying out her promise to provide and keep them safe, but she was glad they were so understanding and open. Her promise to protect them kept her alive, gave her life meaning beyond survival. Should they reject her...

She didn't want to think about it.

Armin and Eren were understandably confused, but they didn't seem to mind being out of the loop. Sakura cleared her throat and turned their attention to them, though her wandering eye noticed Mikasa trying to put on the necklace by herself and failing miserably. She chuckled and helped her out and was elated to see that the necklace rested on top of her red scarf, not hidden by it.

"Tell me, how has your day been?"

The four started exchanging stories, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. The pre-teens complained about the hard work and the treatment they received, but at the same time they were glad they received food and shelter, something most didn't have at the moment. However, they were more interested in what Sakura had been doing, particularly Eren. She told them almost everything about camp, how physically demanding it was (and she asked them if they had been training and much to her surprise they nodded firmly) and how many talented people there were.

"But you're ranked highly, right?" Eren asked in a hopeful voice.

Sakura smirked, not at all humble in front of her wards. "I'm first, actually."

That changed the whole mood of the conversation, especially from Eren's part. He wanted to know _everything_, all the tricks, all the obstacles, all the requirements. His determination was admirable, but Sakura only felt more and more apprehension at this. Eren and Armin were currently arguing about the best time to switch to 3DMG fighting when Sakura interrupted them.

"Hey, guys... I've been thinking... Once I join the military, I'll get paid. I'm sure I can pull some strings to get all of us to Sina if I get in to the Military Police. You guys wouldn't have to join at all, we could all live comfortable lives, and we would never have to worry about losing each other ever again. What do you guys say? It sounds like a good life, right?"

Mikasa and Armin seemed to be considering the proposition, but Eren vehemently shook his head and tightened the Survey Corps' cloak around him. "Sorry, Sakura. I know you want to keep us safe, and I know you don't want to lose us, but we are not meant to live a comfortable life. Everything we owned, everything we were supposed to be, was taken away from us by the titans. I dream of killing titans, I want to breathe titan blood, I wish to cut titans down. My whole life revolves around titans, as despicable as it is. The only way I can be happy is by joining the Survey Corps."

If the other two had been considering her option, they were now in agreement with Eren's feelings. "I want to see the outside world," Armin admitted in a small voice. "Even at the cost of my life, I want to see what's outside these walls. I can't live inside any longer."

Sakura nodded slowly, slightly dejected and increasingly concerned. Her precious people were putting their lives in danger for the sake of revenge, exploration, and a will to protect, in Mikasa's case. "It was worth a shot," she said with a slight smile. Her wards stared at her with happiness and guilt, which just made her even more upset to cause them pain. "Well, let's go see how much you've been practicing! You three better not disappoint me!"

* * *

><p>The next two weeks were considered the happiest after the Shiganshina attack. She had missed the three terribly, their antics, their determination, the history they shared. Not only that, but the three of them knew about her status as a kunoichi. Sakura had told Armin after being convinced by Eren that he was very trustworthy and just as deserving of knowing the truth. And indeed, Armin hadn't looked at her as nothing but an older sister ever since.<p>

She showed them **_Futon: _Kyoryokuna Fuha__** and as much as she wanted to show them **_Shinkuken _**she couldn't because she lacked a sword. Nevertheless, they were very impressed and amazed and only asked more questions. The wonder didn't come from the ninjutsu's ability, because blowing gusts of wind wasn't going to do anything to a seven-meter-tall titan, but it was still very different and incredible.

Just to show that old woman, Sakura's work was truly worth three people's. Not only did she not grow tired, but she was so quick and efficient that she always finished first. She was such an asset that they even let her get away with a few things, like sleeping in the children's quarter to be close to her wards and even working side-by-side with them.

However, all good things came to an end, and soon it was time for Sakura to leave and finish her last year in the 102nd Trainee Corps Class. However, she had decided to not leave alone, and after convincing the old woman to part with a cart she was never going to use, she took the kids with her to Honig, an enlistment site for the 104th Trainee Corps Class. The trip was going to take four days instead of its usual five, but that was fine since Shiro was well-fed and Sakura still had a week off before they started again.

"I can't believe you convinced her to let us go," Armin said from his spot in the cart.

She wanted to turn around and look at them, but riding Shiro required her full attention, especially because she was carrying precious cargo in the back. "I have my ways. Not everyone is as pigheaded as you three."

Sakura took a different route, since she was still a bit wary of stopping in that sketchy town where she had been robbed. She ran many more risks with this decision, and one time they barely made it to an inn before it closed, but in the end it paid off and they reached Honig in record time. She returned Shiro to her rightful owner, a sad affair seeing that she had grown very fond of the mare, and sold the cart she had carried the kids in for a whooping twenty gold and thirty silver coins.

She took her little ducklings on different errands now that she had money. She first took them to enlist in the center of the town, much to their excitement and nervousness. The cart was going to leave to the 104th Trainee Corps camp in five days, at noon. Then she went to pay a room for five days and six nights at the inn, including breakfast and dinner, which drained her of most of her funds, but she still had ten gold to spend, not counting the money she had reserved for the ride back to her own camp.

"Well, I still have some money, so is there anything you guys want?"

"Can you buy us some ale?" Eren asked, a mischievous hint to his voice.

Sakura whacked the back of his head. "Just because you enlisted doesn't mean that you get to drink, you idiot."

"But we're men now! Well, men and woman!"

The kunoichi snorted. "Men? Woman? Eren, you three still blush when I say 'sex.'" She turned to them just when she finished the sentence and felt a surge of satisfaction when their cheeks turned red. It had been very satisfying to explain to them what sex was during their trip, because apparently many men around them had been complaining about how _they didn't get it in that often_. "See, you three are still giggling children."

"Why did you have to tell us that?" Eren moaned.

"I could've gone my life without knowing that," Armin continued, dismayed.

"I'll make sure to remind you that you said that when you're older, Armin," she muttered, feeling even giddier when his cheeks turned an even brighter shade of red.

"No need to be so cruel, Sakura," Mikasa murmured, still a bit flustered.

"Then don't ask to get drunk, brats. Ah, I almost forgot I have to let Petra know I'm back. C'mon, let me introduce you to our class's fourth best cadet."

* * *

><p>They spent the next three days together, enjoying their time together because who knew when they were going to see each other again? However, soon it was the time for Sakura to leave to camp, though they made sure to not have any tearful good-byes.<p>

"We'll see each other soon, okay?" Sakura promised, hugging each one of them tightly.

"Sakura... What branch are you joining?" Mikasa asked, clutching her necklace tightly.

She sighed and gazed at the blue sky. It was a beautiful day with no clouds and a mild temperature. There was no better day for traveling than this one. "You know, the world needs more Wings of Freedom flying in the sky." Getting the words out had been one of the hardest things in her life, because she was admitting defeat in trying to persuade them in joining the Military Police or not joining at all. But if she could not keep them out of danger, then she would have to do her very best in keeping them alive, and the only way to do that was by being by their side.

They smiled confidently at her, and they seemed genuinely happy in her choice.

"Then wait for us, okay?" Eren said with a grin. "No dying."

"I promise, no dying."

With one last hug, she left them at the inn's entrance and walked towards the Rals' house, where Petra was already waiting at the front. Her friend hugged her tightly, excited to see her again. "Ready for this?"

"Let's finish this year once and for all!"

* * *

><p><strong>Futon: Kyoryokuna fuha: Wind Release: Powerful Wind Wave <strong>

**Shinkuken: Vacuum Blade**

**Whee, the Training is over. Not gonna lie, I was kinda waiting for her to join the Survey Corps already but this was some necessary fluff.**

**Also, I promise there is a very good reason why a) Sakura remembers justu instead of memories in trigger-scenes and b) Sakura knows Futon and Suiton (though the second should be a bit obvious, but the explanation not as much). And no, just because she remembers more jutsu doesn't make her more powerful technically. Why? Besides Rasengan and other few special jutsu (like Shinkuken), most require hand seals She can't really perform ninjutsu when she's fighting titans because her hands are grabbing the handles that control the 3DMG **(and it's impossible to use Rasengan with 3DMG as well).**. And as stated in Chapter Three, aerial fighting against multiple titans is a risky business because they're so unpredictable, fast, strong, and tall. There are other jutsu more useful but they won't appear for a while.**

****Interesting tidbit about retrograde amnesia is that they forget explicit memory, but not implicit. That's because motor skills and instinctive physical memories are stored separately from explicit memories. The hippocampus initially processes both types, but explicit memories move to the **cortex**, while implicit ones go to the **cerebellum.** Now it is my belief that spiritual chakra is stored in the cortex because it deals with experiences and understanding of jutsu meanwhile the physical part of chakra is stored in the cerebellum, explaining in more detail why Sakura remembers her fighting techniques but has forgotten her jutsu.****

**A bit of a happier chapter to make up for last one, so yay for that. Also, I'm not sorry for the tease in the dream, or the tease that Sakura doesn't remember her dream. Whoops.**

**My immense gratitude to Basia Orci, pepergirl001, mun3litKnight, animagirl, PinKrystal, brokenmaelstrom, necrofantasia, Kitsukami, Lucia Tsukiyomi-hime, LadyRidger, LovingPillow, Guest, Guest, Guest, and Bum Reviews for being so awesome and leaving reviews. Also, immense thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Reviews are chocolate**

**Penpal**


	6. Offered Hearts

Jett, Oluo, and Petra were ahead of her, but she didn't mind. Nape after nape, she was systematically slashing the wooden titans twice with such precision and force that she knew her first place in their graduating class was guaranteed even if she didn't finish first in the titan killing course. No, there was no need to worry about herself.

However, she _was _worried for her close friend, Amina. Last time she had ranked twenty-sixth in their class, which was quite impressive considering she had been in the lower tens in their first year. Still, she wished to join the Military Police, and if she didn't place in the top ten she would've been forced to join the Survey Corps or the Garrison, one for the glory of humanity with a high fatality rate and the other for a meager living guarding and repairing Wall Rose with namelessness. Neither were good enough for Amina.

Sakura risked looking behind her and inwardly cringed when she didn't see Amina even with her enhanced eyesight. That didn't bode well for her results, especially because Oluo, Sakura, and Petra had bet her rank on her performance in this particular test. If she did badly in this one, she definitely wasn't going to make it to the top ten.

Perhaps they had set their expectations too high. They had done a great job, improving a bottom-class trainee to one in almost the top ten percent of their graduating class, but it was still not enough. Some people weren't made to be talented in some areas and excelled in others. Amina and her manipulating personality made it easy to get away with certain mishaps and mischief they had caused in their last year. She was shrewd, she was shameless, and Sakura was just happy to have her on her side as a friend, but none of that mattered in these tests.

She finished with a flourish, using a combination of excellent 3DMG skills and her own brand of intuition to let go of the wires, speed towards the nape, slash it viciously with her momentum, and quickly send the grappling hooks to another tree, all while making it seem as if she was flying gracefully in the air. She usually wasn't much for fanciness in the field, but this was her last time doing this in the Trainee Corps and she would be damned before she didn't leave a good impression of the Ackerman name.

Just like her sister, Mikasa Ackerman had been labeled a once-in-a-century prodigy in just a year and was famed to the point that there were whispers of her name in the 102nd Trainee Corps Class. Most people thought that their talent came from their shared blood, but nobody except Armin and Eren knew that they were adopted siblings, even if they looked nothing alike. Mikasa was brilliant because she was _that _good and had something to protect; Sakura was labeled a genius because she had chakra and a couple of years of fighting under her belt that her body ––but not her mind–– remembered.

Sakura sent the wires to the base of a tree and used gas to propel herself towards the ground. Emil Ernst gave her an approving nod from his position above in a thick branch, which made her feel slightly dejected. She still hadn't gotten another "good job" from the taciturn man, even after improving her skills to their limits. To think that without her chakra she was nothing made her feel a bit hollow in her chest.

"You're such a show off, Pinky."

"That's really rich coming from you, old man."

Petra sighed and shook her head. "C'mon guys, let's just go to the side and wait for Amina."

"And stop your bickering," Jett added with a grunt. "You're gonna be the cause of our deaths."

Both Sakura and Oluo held back their words and settled for glaring at each other. Since they were the first ones to finish, they chose the spot to rest and wait for Amina to appear. Cadet after cadet finished, some landing gently meanwhile others roughly, but there was still no sign of Amina. She started to grow restless, no longer able to rest comfortably against the tree trunk.

"She will be fine," Petra said, but even she sounded unsure of herself.

The kunoichi stood up with a sigh, wiping her white pants from any excess dirt, and walked back to the finish line. She really didn't know why their uniforms had white pants. Not only did they get dirty, but it was such a risky business to hide a period with them. It was a good thing the uniform included a type of brown sash at the waist, possibly first designed to not stain the bottom of the pants when sitting down, but now acting as a lifesaver for female soldiers all around the three military branches.

Just when Sakura reached the finish line Amina appeared in front of her, fresh and completely relaxed. Emil Ernst gazed down at her impassively for the first few seconds before saying, "Excellent precision and ruthlessness. I expect high marks." With that he broke the eye contact and settled for observing the other trainees, but the effect of his words was instant: Amina grinned widely and Sakura hugged her ecstatically, accidentally lifting her in the air in her excitement.

The two girls made their way to their friends and shared the news, cheering Amina on. Rankings wouldn't come in another week, but if that wasn't an indication that Amina was going to make it to the top ten, they didn't know what would.

* * *

><p>Sakura was woken up by vicious shaking and a pair of excited dark eyes. Still in the spell of sleep, she dully asked, "Amina... Why did you wake me up?"<p>

"Rankings are up, silly. Let's go see!"

As if she had been doused in cold water, she spasmed into a sitting position and jumped from her top bunk bed to the floor, wasting no time in putting on her uniform. She noted the crossed swords with a certain air of sadness, because soon her uniform would be replaced with another one bearing a different insignia.

"Where's Petra?"

"She woke me up and left to get a head start. She said she would meet us outside."

The rankings had always been nailed close to the entrance of the mess hall cabin so that nobody would miss them. Sure enough, the cadets were congregated in one of cabin's walls, a telltale sign of where the parchment was. Sakura tried looking for Petra, but by now everyone was taller than her by more than a few inches, meaning that there was no way she could find Petra, who was also very short. She also lost Amina in the crowd, which also wasn't good.

"Oluo!"

The twenty-year-old whipped his head, looking for the source of the voice and cringing when he found her. "Oh, hey, Pinky."

"What is it?" she asked, suddenly worried. That tone coupled with the expression on his face wasn't a good thing.

"Um, it's Amina... I think it's better if you see for yourself."

Her took her wrist and pushed and shoved his way through the crowd, earning quite a few glares and shouts which neither minded or paid attention to. After almost an eternity of fighting with their fellow classmates, they reached the front. Sakura spotted Amina standing in front of the parchment, unmoving, and her heart clenched in apprehension.

Sakura gently pried Oluo's hand from her wrist and made her way next to Amina. Her gaze was empty, almost unseeing, but it seemed as if she was focusing on the rankings. Already fearing the worst, Sakura started reading the rankings. She was first, no surprise there, with Oluo second, Petra third, and Jett fifth. She continued searching for Amina's name, and almost sighed in relief when she found it so close to Jett's.

"Amina Talman: Eleven... Fuck. I... Amina... I don't know what to say."

"I'm going to die," she whispered. If it weren't for her chakra hearing, she would've missed it, considering the clamor around them. Her eyes were tearing up, but there was a slight smile on her face. "I will die."

Sakura frowned and grabbed her arm, leading them away from the crowd. "You are ranked eleventh, Amina. Eleven out of two hundred thirty-eight. Some _died _in these last three years, but you survived. You won't _die__."_

She laughed quietly and the tears now spilled from her eyes. "No, you don't understand, Sakura. I'm going to die."

Now she was losing her patience. She was being overdramatic just because she wouldn't get to apply to the Military Police. _She _wasn't going to die; Mikasa, Eren, and Armin might. Amina was going to wear roses on her back, not the Wings of Freedom. It angered her that she was thinking of dying because she wasn't going to make it to the Military Police when there were others out there actually dying horrible deaths.

"Stop that. You're not dying."

She only continued crying. "You don't understand right now, but you will later on."

"Then make me understand." Giving her one last glare, she left Amina in the middle of the field.

"I will die next to you, Sakura."

* * *

><p>Their graduation ceremony was that very night, where the top ten were announced and the Trainees were told when they would get to choose their military branch. Luckily, the Commander of the Survey Corps, Erwin Smith, and the Commander of their Section of the Garrison, Dot Pixis, were both nearby and free, meaning that they would receive their speeches persuading them to join their respective branches in one week, which was today.<p>

Sakura avoided Amina all that time, incensed at her comment and reaction. So what if she was Eleven? So what if she wasn't going to live inside Wall Sina? There were worse scenarios in life, and the people that had the right to whine usually didn't. It wasn't that Sakura felt angry at Amina because of what happened to her in her own life, because that wasn't her fault, but she still didn't think she should cry about that.

The rest of their friends left their quarrel alone and instead pretended as if they weren't fighting, opting to not choose sides. Jett had already decided to join the Military Police, but Sakura had been surprised to learn that both Petra and Oluo were having problems deciding. She still remembered Petra wished to move inside Wall Sina to get as far away from the titans as possible, but now wasn't completely convinced about her choice. Oluo had been disillusioned in the Military Police after hearing rumors and evidence of the extent of their corruption, and now he wasn't so sure he wanted to be a part of that. It's not like Sakura had tried to convince either of them to join the Survey Corps, because she didn't want Petra or Oluo to be in a dangerous situation, but she still found it interesting that they had changed so much in the last three years.

It's not like she hadn't changed.

They were a bit far away from the stage. Oluo and Jett were talking about the most amount of time someone can go without using gas and maintaining a good speed meanwhile a stony silence prevailed in the three girls.

"Um, so, how's your night so far?" Petra tried with a small chuckle.

The kunoichi raised her eyebrows and gave her a look. "We've been together the whole day."

Now the nineteen-year-old glared at her, not appreciating her comment. "I know, but it sure has felt like we haven't been together this last week. Come on, Sakura, you're being childish."

"Me? Childish? I think you're accusing the wrong person of being childish, Petra."

"Not everyone is as good as you."

"I'm not asking anyone to be good as me."

"_Some _want to join the Military Police."

"And that's _great_, but we all have to deal with the cards we've been dealt with."

"You're being too harsh! Try having some sympathy!"

The two girls continued arguing, but Amina remained strangely quiet. She had been like that ever since she found out her ranking. Her gaze was almost empty and she was barely responsive, only acknowledging their statements if it had something to do with orders or food. Still, even if she was a barely functioning human being at the moment, she still stayed close to them.

"Attention! Trainees, gather near the stage!"

The girls frowned at each other but made their way to the front, and though their relationship was a bit tense at the moment, they still stood close to each other. The night was cold, even if it was summer, but the fire from the stage and the proximity of their bodies provided some warmth and much-needed light.

The cadets impatiently waited for Erwin Smith to appear, eager to get out of there. It was tradition to give the Survey Corps, the branch with the least recruits and soldiers, the first speech so that their audience was the greatest. The branch was incredibly small, with only three hundred soldiers, and the high mortality rate made it very hard to attract new cadets to join. This order of speech could make the difference from their normal twenty recruits to at least thirty-five, the highest they had ever received.

The 102nd Trainee Corps Class quieted immediately when a tall blond man appeared on the stage. The Wings of Freedom in his left breast pocket made her heart start beating wildly. His stance was imposing and regal, the perfect picture of a commander comfortable and suited for attention and responsibility. His icy blue eyes were studying the crowd with a certain fire Sakura hadn't seen in a soldier, not even in Emil Ernst, a former Survey Corps member.

"I am Erwin Smith, Commander of the Survey Corps. I am here to persuade you to join the Survey Corps." His eyes scanned the crowd, gauging their reactions for a second. "You all joined during the famine, a time of hardship for all of humanity. You all know that this was caused by none other than the titans. The titans took away around twenty percent of humanity, a staggering number with little comparison. Every misfortune you've had, every time you have felt distressed, every moment you've felt wanderlust, it can all be traced back to the existence of titans.

"For the last two years, we have been investing our efforts and lives in creating a route from Trost to Shiganshina to seal the hole and reclaim Wall Maria. It is an ambitious project, but it represents reclaiming back land that is rightfully ours. Next month we will go on an expedition, including this year's recruits to our journey. It will be our 28th, and we expect to claim back another kilometer of our land. In these last two years we have lost around thirty percent of our army. Thirty percent in just two years is a horrifying number. In this first expedition, we predict around thirty percent of you will not return. In the next two years, most of you will be dead. But the survivors... You will be experienced soldiers with a high survival rate."

He was quiet for a few moments, letting the statistics sink in. Sakura glared at the commander for making her heart beat so wildly. So this was what her wards were signing up for? This was the glory that Eren wanted? This was how they would die, mauled by titans when they had tried to escape from them three years ago? She didn't want this for them, she didn't want this for herself, she didn't want this for _anyone_. At least the man didn't lie to any of them; they all knew very well about the chances of their deaths.

As if sensing her glare, Erwin looked at her briefly, his eyes flashing slightly when he saw the hatred in her eyes. Feeling now was the opportune time, Erwin continued, "Knowing these discouraging figures, those willing to join, remain here. Ask yourselves, are you willing to offer your very own heart for the sake of humanity?" The crowd reacted immediately, murmurs erupting in their ranks. "That is all."

At first everyone stood very still, very quiet. Nobody wanted to be the first one to leave, but at the same time Sakura could feel their fear, how most of her class's chakra was in disarray. Jett cleared his throat, smiled at his friends slightly, and started leaving. As if a spell had been broken, the cadets started filing out, murmurs and whispers mingling with the sound of boots crunching the ground below them.

Sakura risked a glance to her right and was surprised to see Petra, Oluo, and Amina standing very firmly, their chests puffed out and their faces grim. She, on the other hand, wanted to leave like Jett had done. She had a spot guaranteed for her in the ranks of the Military Police, a life of peace and safety inside Wall Sina. She could still convince Eren, Mikasa, and Armin to come with her, even if it meant going back on her word. She could promise them a life of luxury and no needs or wants, she just needed to be more convincing next time.

But as much as her mind wanted to move, her feet remained rooted to her spot. She was so scared, but her body did not quiver in fright. She wished to scream, but her mouth remained shut in a firm line.

She wanted to flee, but she had made a promise, and she would be damned if she went back on her promises.

"Amina..." she finally whispered when she gained a hold of her voice.

The woman turned to her and smiled slightly. "I will die next to you, Sakura."

At that moment she fully understood the meaning behind her words, and a couple of seconds later she was crying quietly, restraining her sobs to the best of her ability. She wasn't crying because her mind recognized the validity behind her words, but she wept because she no longer wanted to leave and join another branch, because she held on to the hope that she had chance to keep her precious friends alive, because she understood that the more people she let past her mental walls, the more pain and suffering she was going to experience.

"Can you die if you're ordered to?" he asked the next twenty-seven members of the Survey Corps.

"No, not yet," Oluo answered loudly, his voice devoid of his usual cockiness.

Erwin glanced at him and smiled slightly. "Very well, I like what I see and hear. I welcome everyone here to the Survey Corps. Give me your best salute! This is a show of my respect for you."

The blond gave them all a very firm salute, one that everyone in the crowd returned with just as much fervor. Whether the cadets fully understood what they had signed up for, Sakura wasn't sure. She was the only one in her class that had seen and almost killed a titan, and their appearance and chakra presence still made her shiver whenever she thought about them.

The better question was: was she fully aware of what she had signed up for?

* * *

><p>They spent their last night in the training camp and in the morning they headed to the Survey Corps headquarters, a large terrain consisting of a large training field, a forest with multiple titan-killing courses, and four main buildings: the women's dormitory, the men's dormitory, the higher-ups special quarters, and a storage house that doubled as a stable. The rookies settled in one of the smaller buildings, one especially designed for the newcomers, keeping them away from most of the older members because their duties were different.<p>

Unlike the other branches which had a lot of downtime, the Survey Corps was constantly in action. Every month there was at least one expedition which lasted from five days to a whole week depending on the losses. Sometimes the expeditions didn't even get to be three days long, and on those cases they would have an extra expedition that month. The rest of the time they were practicing and training, improving their survival rate by honing the mind and body. However, the rookies spent most of their time learning the formation instead of training, explaining their relative isolation from the rest of the Survey Corps.

It was absolutely necessary that they knew what to do because their lives were in grave danger the moment they left Trost. As rookies, they were in charge of keeping the spare horses and serving as backup recon units. Not only that, but there could be no more than one rookie in one team of three. A squad was composed of nine teams, and there was a Team Leader in every team. A Senior Team Leader oversaw the other eight and served directly under a Squad Leader, who usually oversaw three whole squads. There was one more Squad Leader, whose name was Levi, but he was in charge of a Special Operations Squad composed of the very best in the Survey Corps. He also was the Second-in-Command of the entire Survey Corps.

During the last week, after having the Long-Range Scouting Formation beaten into their heads, the Survey Corps finally decided to test the physical side of the recruits. First they were given a horse and asked them to ride, just to make sure they knew how to control their horse and change speeds. She had been given a golden brown horse which she had immediately christened as Haruto, even though his name was Samson. For some reason the name fit, especially after she discovered his exuberant personality.

Haruto was hard to handle, but Sakura enjoyed him greatly, sometimes even laughing when she was riding in the fields. Her Team Leader, a blonde woman named Elsie Klein, expressed her surprise in how quickly the horse had taken a liking to her but warned Sakura not to get too attached, since lost or dead horses were a common part of the process.

Still, she would try her best to keep Haruto next to her.

Four days before the expedition, the Survey Corps got out the titan-killing course to assess their skill. As Erwin had explained to the less-than-enthusiastic rookies, they needed to see what their file said about them. Team Leaders with a rookie on their squad were required to watch their own rookie so that they could see their fighting style and decide just how much responsibility the rookie could be entrusted with.

"Are you worried about this expedition?" Petra asked her as the Survey Corps members finished the installation process.

Sakura frowned slightly and nodded. "Scared out of my mind. Titans scare me..."

"Oh really?" Oluo said as sarcastically as he could. "What's so scary about giants that eat you alive?"

"Your humor is not appreciated, old man."

"You're older than me, Pinky!"

Amina sighed loudly and pushed them both, earning herself a heated glare from both of her friends. "Stop it. We're not in the mood for your antics."

Before either of them could reply, Squad Leader Mike Zacharius landed in front of the twenty-seven rookies, effectively shutting all of them up. They had heard stories of his prowess and there was no one in the group who did not instantly respect them. Not only that, but the man's presence _demanded _respect from everybody.

"The course is done. The training camp did not care about speed, but here in the Survey Corps one second can mean the end of you or a comrade. So finish as fast and effectively as you can." The rookies dropped their salute and relaxed a bit more, though they were still on edge because of the time restraint. "Also, the part where no one is watching is a lie. Right now you all are our weakest link, and it is good to know about the weakest link. Don't make fools out of yourselves."

With that the man was gone, disappearing into the woods quickly with his 3DMG. His last statement had definitely left everyone on edge. It was hard to know that thirty percent of them would be gone in the next week, but the Survey Corps also pointed out their weakness. In a way, it made them nervous, but they also felt safer, because if the Survey Corps knew their faults and limits, then they were more likely to have better teamwork and a better survival rate.

From what she could hear, Oluo and Petra had done exceptionally and were considered to have the highest survival rate, followed by Amina. Now it was her turn to go, after fifty minutes of waiting. Once the soldier stationed at the entrance gave the go, Sakura took off into the woods.

The Survey Corps's titan-course was not the one the Trainee Corps class used. Whereas the other one had titans evenly spaced out and hidden, the titans here had more variety in their locations as well as groupings. Sometimes she had to search for the next titan meanwhile other times it was _right there_. Some titans were by their lonesome meanwhile there was this one time that she had to take down four in one go.

She knew she was doing very good because more people were watching her. The soldiers were hidden in the woods, yes, but their chakra gave them away. She was very impressed by how quiet and cautious they were, to the point that if she were a normal human being she would've never realized she was being tailed. As long as they remained hidden and the titan course remained predictable, she would be fine.

The trees decreased in number and size and soon she saw the end of the forest. Thinking the course was over, Sakura latched the grappling hook to the floor and landed gently, already looking forward to her results. The chakra of six people alerted her that she wasn't alone, and three wooden titans surrounded her, away from any trees. Sakura quickly changed blades and prepared herself to fight again, suddenly on the edge.

She knew they were doing this to emulate the terrain outside the walls, but she still did not appreciate this. She aimed her grappling hook to the foam part of the nearest titan and quickly propelled herself forward with gas. In the middle of her flight she noticed Survey Corps members moving the titan with her in tow, causing her to lose her direction. If her reflexes had been slower, she might've crashed against the floor, which would have been a very grave injury at these speeds. Cursing in her native language, she let go of that hook and aimed to the farthest titan's foam part, knowing from intuition and a little bit of luck that she was going to make it before hitting the ground.

Sakura took advantage that there was a titan in between the one that had moved and the one she was now attached to. She slashed the nape of the middle titan without stopping. This caused her to lose a bit of height, so once she was close to the wooden titan, she aimed her gas down, pushing her up rapidly, and let go completely of all of her hooks once she was high enough. She landed on the foam and sticked to it easily with the help of chakra. Sakura sliced off its nape with both her blades, attached another hook to the the titan that had moved, and finished the course by slashing its nape twice.

Once she was down she put away her things and walked away, though she wasn't sure if she was supposed to do this. When nobody stopped her, she just walked away and back to her dormitory, eager to take a bath, aware of the sets of eyes studying her movements.

* * *

><p>The morning of the expedition was a jittery one for everyone, especially the rookies. It was an unspoken fact that this expedition was going to be many's last, and that kind of knowledge ate away a weaker's person sanity. In that aspect, Sakura had a very high respect for the soldiers of the Survey Corps. They were strong, loyal, and proudly wore the Wings of Freedom on their backs, even if she had started calling them Wings of Death lately in her mind.<p>

Even though she was very sure that she wasn't going to die just yet, she still wrote a letter to Armin, Eren, and Mikasa, updating them about her exploits and status.

"You're writing to your siblings?" If she hadn't felt Petra's chakra coming, she would've jumped.

"Yeah, just in case... you know, something happens."

Petra sighed and plopped down on her bed. "I finally told my dad I joined the Survey Corps and this might be my last letter to him."

Sakura cringed, finding the situation a bit heartless and abrupt. Out of their group of five, Petra had always been the most in tune with other people's feelings, which meant she was fully aware of how much pain she was causing her father. She was about to chastise her for her tactlessness when she remembered something more pressing. "You know, I forgot to ask you: why did you join the Survey Corps?"

"What do you mean?"

"I know Oluo was a bit put off by the corruption inside the Military Police," she began, offering part of the truth. Both Jett and her knew that the main reason he had joined the Survey Corps was to be close to Petra, the girl he had been crushing on for the past three years. He might even be in love with her by now, not that she had asked. "But you always wanted to live inside Sina. So why did you go from a life of guaranteed safety to worrying if you're gonna live to see tomorrow?"

Much to her surprise, Petra chuckled and broke the eye contact with Sakura. A little smile remained in her mouth, and with a small voice she asked, "Have you ever felt your life was meaningless or without a purpose?"

She tried to think back to the last six years she had a memory of and look for a moment where she had felt the emptiness Petra had talked about. At first it was finding someone who spoke her language, then it was taking care of Helsa, then her happiness with the Ackermans, then looking after Mikasa and being grateful to the Jaegers, then looking after Mikasa, Eren, and Armin, and, lastly, staying alive to protect them. Her very livelihood was full of purposes, and although she wasn't sure about the _meaningfulness _behind her life, she frankly didn't care. "No," she answered after a few moments, "I haven't felt that yet."

Petra sighed, her smile disappearing. "It's a truly horrible feeling, realizing that your life lacks that special something. Joining the Military Police would've destroyed my opportunity to have a meaningful life with a purpose, meanwhile the Survey Corps makes me feel that just by wearing their insignia on my back."

"Even if that entails having a meaningless death?"

"Yeah, especially that. I think it's much worse having a meaningless life than a meaningless death. Deaths are instant... Lives... not so much."

"Deaths are a bit more permanent, though."

Her amber eyes light up in amusement. "You're just not very aware of that death anymore, are you?"

"How are you so sure?"

Amina walked in, interrupting their conversation. She was fully prepared, with her green cloak on and her 3DMG gear strapped around her hips. In her defense, Sakura already had put on her body-belt, the hardest part of putting on the 3DMG. "Oh, this is where you two were. You do realize breakfast will end in ten minutes, right?"

Petra was up and out in an instant, promising Sakura to save some food. She finished writing her letter, sending her loves and all of that stuff she was supposed to say if these were indeed her last words. In the end, she promised to send a letter immediately after she came back, so she told them not to worry.

"Finish your letter?" Sakura asked absentmindedly, writing a few last things.

"I don't want to write to anybody."

She stopped writing and whipped her head around. "You don't?"

Amina shook her head but then hummed. "Hm.. maybe my parents, but they live inside Wall Sina."

"What the––"

"I think it's best if you go eat, Sakura. We won't eat lunch after we reach the checkpoint."

The kunoichi frowned, not liking the avoidance of the subject. Unfortunately, her friend was right, and Sakura had to leave the room to get her much needed sustenance.

The hallways were devoid of people, who were probably rushing to get some breakfast or doing some last minute preparations. It was this lack of people that forced her to salute Hange Zoe, a Squad Leader of the Survey Corps; usually she would've gotten away with a nod of acknowledgement, but right now she needed to show her respect.

Her brown eyes widened in recognition and her mouth split into a grin. "Ah, you're Sakura Ackerman, right? Of course, you're the only one with pink hair, silly me."

Ah, her hair color followed her wherever she went. She had come to terms with the level of attention she got from it, though, and understood that people were just wondering how the hell that could happen. "Yes, that is me, Squad Leader Hange."

"Good. I've been looking for you! Follow me."

Her stomach growled lightly and she held back a grimace; she really should've eaten earlier. Either way, she was curious as to why such a high-ranking member needed to see her. "Yessir."

Sakura walked a few steps behind her, a customary show of respect that had been drilled into her from training camp. After a few seconds of this arrangement Hange looked back at her and sent her a quizzical look. "Is everything all right? Why are you so far behind?"

She blinked, her green eyes confused. "Isn't this what I'm supposed to do?"

The squad leader's openly laughed, but it was not mocking. "Oh, I completely forgot you were a rookie. Here in the Survey Corps we don't do that; it makes talking a bit awkward."

Sakura sighed in relief and hurried next to Hange. She had to admit she hated these stupid showings of subservience. She was a woman that could carry _ten _times her own weight, make the ground shake with her punches, shoot water and wind from her mouth, and possibly bring back a man or woman from the brink of death; in short, she was a _iryo-nin_. Still, as much as it wounded her pride, she was very aware that she needed to keep her powers hidden, especially now that she was in the Survey Corps. The Military Police might kill her immediately, the Garrison would definitely turn her in, but the Survey Corps would likely turn her into a weapon for the sake of humanity._  
><em>

"Wow, I think I may have found someone shorter than Levi," she heard her murmur in wonder. Sakura cocked her head to the side; wasn't that the squad leader of that special operations squad?

The walk was not long, because they quickly found the person Hange was looking for. "Ah, there you are. Moblit!"

A man with short brown hair and light brown eyes whipped his head around. He gave his leader a firm salute, more of respect than anything since she could feel the strong respect between the two. "Squad Leader Hange! Is this Sakura?"

"It is!" Hange put a firm hand on her shoulder and pointed at Moblit with the other. "Sakura, this is Moblit Berner, your new team leader. I know this is last minute, but we just reached the decision yesterday to switch you from Elsie's team to Moblit's. Don't worry, he's very qualified, as expected from my second-in-command."

Sakura gave her leader a salute, her eyes determined. "I hope to serve you well, sir."

"Uh, Moblit is fine," the man replied with an embarrassed smile.

The kunoichi looked up at Hange, her eyes confused. "If you don't mind my asking, why the change?"

"Elsie noted that you were a bit too experienced to be on her squad, since we're used to having those of the lower ranks. After watching your performance four days ago, Moblit and I agreed to put you in his team. You are more likely to encounter titans in Moblit's squad––" Sakura stiffened "––but at the same time Moblit's team is more experienced and prepared than Elsie's. So the odds of you surviving are roughly the same."

Her mouth quirked into a grim smile. "I see... What about the team chemistry?"

"We've found that chemistry and trust is best built in the face of titans," Moblit answered her. "The practices you had were mostly to make you feel less nervous."

"Makes me feel much better."

"Well, if you guys are all set we are leaving in ten minutes."

With that Hange was off, leaving Moblit and Sakura alone. It was then that her stomach gave a loud growl, making her blush furiously and Moblit chuckle at her expense.

"As long as you get there in time, you should go get a quick breakfast."

Sakura expressed her thanks and rushed out to the mess hall. She felt a bit nervous to first see the mess hall empty, but sighed in relief when she saw a black-haired man drinking what smelled like tea alone in one of the farther tables, completely relaxed and unhurried. She went to the kitchen part of the mess hall and took a loaf of bread, chomping it in four bites, and then grabbed a glass of water, drinking it in two gulps.

Now all she had to do was finish putting on her 3DMG, get on Haruto, and find her teammates in less than seven minutes. She ran to her room, using a bit of chakra when she was sure there was no one around, and finished putting on her 3DMG. Then she rushed to the stables and felt relief when she saw more people chatting leisurely on top of their horses.

As soon as she mounted Haruto they started moving. Sakura led Haruto with the crowd and they soon reached a line full of around one hundred Survey Corps members. Only one of the three divisions, each of one hundred members, attended expeditions, meanwhile the other two rested. The only ones who attended every expedition were the Squad Leaders, Commander Erwin, and the Senior Team leaders; the other two divisions trained for their next assigned expedition. She heard someone call her name and she moved to the front, the source of the call.

Moblit beckoned her next to him and another blond man. She hurried Haruto but then slowed down to match the speed of their trot once they were next to her. "Sakura, this is Carlo Schneider. He has been with me the past three expeditions."

His blue eyes were warm and he smiled brightly. "Hello, nice to meet you."

She smiled in return, happy to have a friendly face around. "Nice to meet you as well. Uh, why are we so ahead?"

"Our squad is in charge of observing titans, both deviant and normal, so we need to be in a position with the most amount of contact. We hope to capture one some day, but for now we must make do with what we have."

"So we don't kill them?"

Carlo answered, "Only if they threaten formation, which they almost always do. So more often than not, we'll see a titan."

"Oh, okay."

He gave her a quizzical look. "You don't sound... disturbed. Most would be afraid."

Well, most aren't super-powered humans who can control elements and body-flicker their way out of problems. "It's not my first time seeing titans... I don't _want _to see them again, but I'm slightly aware of what I'm getting into."

They were now on Trost's main road, and people were looking at them with respect and awe. Some were even cheering. It made Sakura feel much better about the whole decision, but she still had her misgivings.

They came to a stop in front of the gate. Sakura was so close to the front that she could actually see Commander Erwin easily. He started a countdown for the opening of the gates, which made her heart beat wildly in anticipation, and as soon as the gates opened, they all left at a full gallop. After around five minutes of riding he ordered the groups to divide, all of them splitting up in their respective squads.

Since this was the 28th Expedition, most of the first couple of kilometers were completely devoid of titans. However, just when her arms were about to stop shaking, she felt that horrible chakra she hadn't felt in over three years. It was unnatural, it was terrifying, and it made her whole body shiver. It was as if her own body was warning her there was a predator around and ordering her to _flee_, not get closer.

Sensing chakra wasn't something normal soldiers could do so she kept quiet, simply observing her right ––the place she felt the titan–– with her chakra-enhanced eyesight. So when she finally saw what looked like an seven-meter class, she wasn't surprised at all.

Carlo got out his gun and fired a red flare. The titan moved to grab them but they hurried their horses and easily evaded it. She watched with awe as the other members fired their own flares until a green one was fired, indicating a change in their direction. It was amazing to Sakura how such a simple color could completely change the whole route of their expedition. It made her feel even more respect for her commander's ingenuity.

The next hour or so were spent in relative peace, with flares changing the directions and warning their squad mates of the presence of titans. Even Moblit and Carlo cracked jokes, with Sakura joining in every once in a while. It seemed as if it was going to be a good expedition when she felt her stomach drop.

This chakra was just as horrifying as the other titan chakra, but there was something else about it, something different but at the same time similar enough that made it obvious that it was a titan. The source was straight ahead, and two minutes later she spotted what looked like a nine-meter class dozing in the fields, looking up to the sky.

Moblit and Carlo spotted it around a minute after her. She saw that they prepared themselves, Carlo reaching for his handgrip meanwhile Moblit took out the flare gun.

"What do you think about this one?" the blond asked, staring at Sakura with serious eyes.

It was obvious now that the difference in chakra she felt was because it was a deviant. "He's a bit different. Is he––"

Her words were interrupted by a sudden change in the titan. It immediately stood up, looked around, and took off to the center of the formation. Moblit and Carlo both cursed and took off after it, heading west, not before telling her to stay back and fire the black signal.

She had just finished shooting it when she felt another one of those deviant chakra presences behind heading straight towards her at startling speed. She considered telling Moblit and Carlo, but they were too far away and too busy trying to take that other titan down, in open terrain no less. Comparing Haruto's pace with the titan's, she knew chances were that she wouldn't be able to outrun it.

Sakura cursed shakily in her native tongue and stopped Haruto and turned him around, heading into the direction of the deviant. It was a seven-meter class, with an enlarged torso, small head, and thin legs. Riding straight at him was a disadvantage, but she quickly formulated a plan to turn the situation around. She made Haruto move to the right and once the titan was about to get close to her she sent her hook straight through the titan's right wrist. She propelled herself forward and expertly dodged the left hand that reached for her by shifting her weight and once she was close she slashed straight through its wrist, cutting off its hand with a little help from her chakra.

Before she fell, she took advantage of her new position and sent her hook to its nape. Killing sideways was always tricky because the titan could move its head and munch her before she even realized it, so she shifted her weight again to create a wide arc with the wires. Now she used her gas to fling herself at its nape and cut it off.

Sakura held on tight as the titan fell down and jumped down from its neck, heading to Haruto. The light brown horse neighed happily when he saw her and she mounted with a new sense of pride. She had just taken down that shit _without _using chakra too much. She was just as deserving and good as any other Survey Corps member.

She came across Moblit and Carlo a couple of seconds after trotting, and, from the looks of it, they had seen everything. Sakura wasn't very sure how they were going to react, because although technically she had not broken any orders, she hadn't followed them either. All she knew was that she had taken a titan before it ate one of her comrades and that was good.

"You brought one down all by yourself," Carlo said with a certain degree of awe.

Sakura frowned and ordered Haruto to slow down once she reached them. "If I didn't we could've died. You guys were busy with the bigger one, and I wasn't."

Moblit sped up his horse, attempting to get back into formation, and Carlo and Sakura followed suit. "Still, this will be an interesting development for your next team."

"My next team?"

"They change with every expedition, usually to accommodate losses. Things will look different next time."

She sighed, not completely liking the idea. The only bonds she had formed and nurtured in the training squad were with Petra, Amina, and Oluo, the former two because she shared a room with and the latter one because of their competitiveness. Sakura wasn't very good at making friends with other people, mostly because she forgot what their names were or their faces and sometimes even both. She didn't even know what Levi, their famed strongest soldier, looked like, and she had already forgotten Mike Zacharius's appearance. Hange was an exception, mostly because she saw her walking around the rookie quarters more often than most and she was assigned to one of her squads.

It was a bit aggravating that she was just starting to know and make memories about Moblit Berner and Carlo Schneider only for them to be erased before they could be solidified. What was the point of a strong camaraderie if she didn't even get to know the soldiers more intimately? What was the point of team chemistry if they were constantly changing squads?

Maybe the Survey Corps was doing its members a favor. Either one of them three could die at any moment. Would it be better to be sad about the death of that squad mate she just met a couple hours ago or be absolutely devastated about the death of the person who saved your life more than once? There were benefits and costs to each model, but she was a big proponent for balance.

"Don't worry," Carlo said, breaking her from her musings, "I'm sure you'll stay here. Scouts have the highest death rate but they are the most skilled. If Commander Erwin acts like I think he will, you will remain here."

After one more hour of riding they set camp on top of a hill. Erwin proudly said they had lost no men until now, calling it one of the more successful expeditions in their history. Soon the conversation became grimmer, letting his soldiers know that tomorrow they were going to a titan-infested area that they had to clear in order to secure the supply line. The good news was that it was a town with high 3DMG agility, meaning that they were right in their element.

Once the speech was over sunset was almost done, signifying the end of the titan menace for now. Sakura was assigned a tent with two female soldiers she had never seen before. She tried looking for Amina or Petra or, hell, Oluo to eat dinner but she couldn't find them anywhere in the camp. She had been looking forward to talking to them, but that would have to wait for another day, it seemed.

Her fellow soldiers with whom she shared a tent were much too tired to even carry a conversation, so after a succinct "goodnight," they quickly fell asleep.

* * *

><p>The expedition was a success: they secured a supply checkpoint, lost only twenty-three men (five of them were her classmates), and accomplished all of that in just three days. Overall, the Survey Corps soldiers were in good spirits.<p>

Riding back from a successful mission was extremely fulfilling. She had found out that the reason Petra, Amina, Oluo (and, really, most of her classmates) were missing was because they had either pissed or shitted themselves when they saw titans. Though she hadn't done that in the expedition or when they attacked Shiganshina, she remembered the fear firsthand and how much she _wanted _to shit her pants.

She felt the presence of a titan around two kilometers away from them and methodologically got out her gun and equipped a red flare. Though it was impossible to get used to such horrific chakra, she was starting to force her body to follow a pattern when it came to titans. Mostly she avoided them because fighting each and every one of them would undoubtedly tire her out. Still, two days ago when she was running away from a titan, it had gotten so close that for a second she thought she was really going to die. In the end, Haruto outran it, but just thinking about it would make her heart start beating faster.

"Uh, Sakura, why do you have your gun out? There are no titans around."

She grimaced and tried to hold in her panic. Stupid, stupid, stupid! What a naive mistake! Of course they didn't know why she had gotten out the flare gun: because there was no titan _in sight_, but that didn't mean that it wasn't _there, _around five hundred meters away. Neither Moblit nor Carlo were stupid; once they put two and two together they would realize that she had a gift for sensing titans. She could either come clean right now or explain herself to a more skeptical and distrusting Survey Corps if they found out she had been keeping such important information to herself.

"I... I can _sense _them,"she yelled, trying to speak above the horses' gallops, still unsure if this was the best decision. Didn't Mike Zacharius have a famous nose that could detect titans kilometers away? So then it wouldn't be so strange if she could, right? "There's one around ten seconds away from us."

Neither one of them had the time to be doubtful, because eight seconds later a titan spotted them and started running after them. Sakura immediately released her flare and followed Moblit's lead to run away from it.

Things relaxed once they escaped and Commander Erwin changed the formation.

"Why didn't you say anything before?" Carlo asked loud enough for her to hear.

"I thought I was crazy! But now I confirmed it!"

"We must tell Commander Erwin about this!"

Though Sakura nodded back eagerly, inside she felt her heart clench and her gut drop. So much for keeping a low profile...

So much for not becoming a weapon.

* * *

><p><strong>2 kilometers is a little bit more than one mile.<strong>

**This is where I take most of my creative liberties when it comes to amnesia. The inability to form new memories is something from anterograde amnesia, not retrograde. However, with author discretion, I think it wouldn't be too far-fetched to say that Sakura has some issues recalling name/faces, so let's just say she's really bad at those, though pre-amnesia Sakura was good at that because of her need to know patients. So, tl;dr yes, the man who was drinking tea alone was Levi. And yes, he'll be appearing next chapter.**

****Though I know Isayama left Hange's gender up for interpretation in the manga (and I mostly follow manga for canon unless noted otherwise), I have to go with the anime and make them female. Why? Because I can't bear to use the plural pronouns when referring to a singular subject (wasn't that last sentence awkward?), and switching from referring to Hange from her to him is just a bit awkward. So, nothing major, but I like sticking to an author's canon with his/her characters so I had to justify this.****

****A million thanks to Arisu-kun, Basia Orci, animagirl, Guest, Jetsmillion, PinKrystal, flevantein, LadyRidger, brokenmaelstrom , I love to review, mun3litKnight , Faeleen Giang Tien, and deansinchester for being so awesome and reviewing. Also, thank you to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!****

**Comments, criticisms, or concerns are widely appreciated!**

**Penpal**


	7. Sensor

The first day after they came back started rather averagely. They were moved from the rookie quarters and were assigned real rooms in the women's dormitories. Luckily she got to keep Amina and Petra as her roommates plus another girl by the name of Rita Grun, until now a rather average member of the 102nd Trainees Squad but now a soldier of the Survey Corps. After transferring rooms she wrote a new letter to her three wards and threw away the letter she wrote before the expedition, thinking it be better that they didn't even see her last words. Then the Team Leaders made them run laps, spar, and clean their 3DMG before calling it a day by two o'clock.

For a second there, she honestly thought she was going to get away with it. For a moment she believed that Moblit and Carlo had kept her little secret, thinking it was outrageous that anyone would believe them. So when, after taking a shower, a soldier summoned her to Commander Erwin's office, she was a little more than just nervous and crestfallen.

She was scared shitless and devastated.

Sakura dragged her feet against the stone floors with an almost petulant manner to it. She was thinking of ways to go around her problem, explanations as well as possible reasons for her "gift." She was definitely not going to bring up chakra; if she did she might as well write her will and declare her own death sentence. Should she say it was a family thing? But then they might ask if Mikasa had it, or, worse, might dig a little deeper into her background and find out she doesn't really have a biological family. Then perhaps it was a gift from God? No, that was stupid; someone like Commander Erwin would never believe a second of it.

Her feet came to a stop once she reached the door that led to his office. Her heart started to beat wildly and her breaths became harsher. Whatever she said from now on could be used against her and, at the same time, decide the fate of her and her wards' lives. One wrong phrase, one wrong move, and everything could spiral down into a worse mess.

Her green eyes narrowed in annoyance at herself. She was a _kunoichi_, dammit, not some little girl who had been caught stealing candy! She had a great power that, although it brought her a lot of grief, made her a suitable and excellent soldier and asset. If they decided to kill her she would simply run away and make a new life far away from this mess. She didn't need _them_; they needed _her_.

With those thoughts firmly lodged in her mind, she knocked the door twice, opening it after her commander's strong voice allowed her to come in. She entered slowly and her eyes widened after she closed the door. Sitting behind his desk was Commander Erwin, regal and formidable as ever. Behind him and looking out the window stood Mike Zacharius, his tall frame imposing and observant. Perched in one of the two chairs in front of Erwin's desk was Hange, who offered her an encouraging smile and beckoned her to take a seat next to her. A short, familiar black-haired man was leaning his back against the bookshelf, his gray eyes bored and aloof. If she had to take a wild guess that would be Levi.

Sakura saluted briefly before making her way towards the seat Hange had pointed at. She tried to relax herself, but her body stiffened slightly once she noticed that the commander had not said anything because he was reading over her file. Just how much did that change her plans, or her speech? Hopefully she wouldn't be caught lying.

Erwin closed the file and looked up, offering her a small smile. "Good evening, Sakura. Thank you for coming, even if you are done with your duties by now."

It's not like she could refuse an order from her commanding officer, but she didn't give that thought a voice. Not knowing what to say without sounding snarky, she nodded, urging him to continue.

"Moblit Berner and Carlo Schneider informed me personally and more detailedly in their report that you have the ability to sense titans. Is this true?"

"Yes, I can."

Mike's hazel eyes became interested and he stepped closer until he was standing next to Erwin's desk. "How so?"

Indeed, how could she explain her sensing abilities to them without mentioning chakra? She squirmed slightly, unsure on how to correctly respond without endangering herself. "I don't know how to explain it... It's a horrifying feeling, like when you _know _something bad is going to happen. It's eery, it gives me goosebumps, but sure enough a titan is there. Deviants feel different too... I don't know how to explain it."

"Amazing," Hange whispered. "You wouldn't mind us testing it, right?"

Sakura blinked. Well, that was easier than what she thought. She had come prepared to answered a barrage of questions, but right now they were just asking for proof. "Right now?"

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea," Erwin added. "If this is true, it could change my plans. It'd be best to prove it as soon as possible. Hange, Levi, get ready: we're leaving in ten minutes. Mike, you're in charge until I come back."

Hange jumped to her feet and left immediately, obviously enthusiastic about the test.

"Tch, this brat better not be wasting our time."

Sakura bristled at his comment. Was he calling _her _a _brat_? She wasn't just any run-of-the-mill person who had just managed to join the Survey Corps. She could break every single one of his bones before he even had a chance to scream, and he dared belittle her?**  
><strong>

She sighed and calmed herself down. Maybe she was overreacting a bit, but she definitely did _not _like his tone.

Erwin smiled at her slightly, as if apologizing for his subordinate. "Go get ready, Sakura. I don't think this will take longer than a few hours, but still be prepared."

The pink-haired woman was the last one to arrive to their little group. It had taken her a while for her to convince Haruto to leave the stall. He, just like her, wasn't too keen in going outside the walls, especially since they had just arrived a day ago. She understood why Erwin wanted to confirm the validity of her teammates' report, but at the same time she wasn't exactly sure why he was placing so much emphasis in finding if this was true. It seemed a bit risky to endanger their lives right now when he could find out in the next expedition.

The journey to Trost's gate was silent from Levi and Erwin's part, but Hange kept asking her questions, mostly as to the probable origins of her gift. She played the innocent card, claiming that she had assumed that it was nervousness the first three times she felt it and finally caught on later on, but she still didn't believe it herself.

Convincing the Garrison to open the gate took less than five minutes, mostly because of Erwin's commanding tone. Once it was opened, the blond commander charged at full speed, forcing his three subordinates to do the same in order to follow behind him.

After around twenty minutes of a harsh ride, Erwin slowed down until he was riding next to them. "If you feel a titan, let us know immediately!" he yelled above the loud gallops of their horses.

The next thirty minutes were spent in stony silence. For once in her life, she didn't know if she wanted to see a titan or not. On one hand, if they didn't see one, they might think that this was a farce and leave the issue for later, but on the other hand she wanted to prove to them that she wasn't lying. It was a conflicting emotion, wanting to do opposite things for opposite reasons. She was irritated with herself for being so ambivalent about something so important. Why couldn't she make up her mind, dammit?

Luckily for her, the choice was made in her stead. She sensed a titan's chakra around two and a half kilometers to the northwest. It surprised her, because she hadn't felt a titan at such a long range before, meaning that she could hone this skill. Before she inform them of her findings, she detected a deviant chakra a bit further away from the other titan, but still close enough for her to detect it.

"Two titans, one deviant and one normal. Northwest, around two kilometers from here," she shouted.

Erwin nodded, acknowledging her statement, and changed their course, though he slowed down considerably so as to not draw any unwanted attention. Sure enough, there they were: one of them was sitting down, looking up to the sky, and the other one had its back facing them, staring off into the distance. They came to a stop before either one of them could notice, observing the titans warily.

"Which one is the deviant?" Hange whispered.

"The one standing up."

"So you can feel these shits' presence? That's lovely."

She had to hold in her scowl.

"Let's go back before they see us."

Sakura didn't know if Erwin had jinxing powers, but for a second she was convinced, because the moment that utterance left his lips the two titans noticed them and immediately started chasing them. The commander ordered an immediate retreat, one that she followed without protests. Not only was she unlike Eren in his urge to slaughter titans, but she didn't know how well she would be able to hide her natural superiority in the face of such experienced and observant people. The assimilation process had gone off well, and if she wanted to live a peaceful life, she needed to keep her head down.

Haruto ran fast and hard for a few minutes and it seemed as if they were going to be able to outrun them when she felt three more titan presences ahead of them, two coming from the right and a deviant one from the left. Though they were around two kilometers away, they were closing in quickly, meaning they would graze them or, worse, come in contact with them.

"Three titans ahead! One is a deviant! They will close in on us!"

She expected nervous reactions, but Levi still looked bored, Hange still looked ecstatic, and Erwin.. Well, he did change a bit; now he looked _annoyed. _Apparently the idea of having to fight with titans didn't faze them as much as it did to her. On the positive side, at leas the two titans that were chasing them had grown tired and stopped.

"Hange, take care of the deviant. I'll bring down the other two," Levi ordered in his monotone voice. His aloof gray eyes landed on her next, "You... make sure you don't get eaten or this will be a big waste of time."

She scowled slightly and bit back, "I'm not about to become titan food... Sir."

His eyes glinted, maybe as a warning, maybe as a sign of recognition, Sakura wasn't sure. All she knew was that none of them were surprised when the four-meter, five-meter, and seven-meter class titans appeared, running at them at full speed. It was aggravating that they lacked a semblance of intelligence, because at least then what they were doing had a purpose and they would be able to predict their moves. At the same time, though, their lack of intelligence made them vulnerable to begin with.

Hange and Levi were off once they were close enough, leaving Erwin and Sakura running back to the gate. She knew she had to keep her eyes on the field, watching for any dangers if her sensing ability failed her, but she couldn't help to look back and see how masterfully Levi and Hange fought, particularly the black-haired man. His 3DMG skills were smooth, his form was strong and graceful, and his speed put hers to shame. Watching him fight made her realize just why he was considered Humanity's Strongest, and that as good as she was, she still had long ways to go before she was on par with him in titan-slaying.

They continued riding for a little while until Erwin suggested (he really ordered) to stop and wait for Hange and Levi, relying on her sensing skills to be on the lookout for any danger. He used this time to ask a little bit more about her ability, hoping to clear what exactly she could do and what were her limits. Now she felt more relaxed, because it was obvious that they weren't out to get her and instead wanted her help. She answered their questions a bit more truthfully meanwhile still avoiding the topic of chakra.

She didn't have to wait much longer, because her superiors came back almost five minutes later, bickering over something about titan appendages. (Well, Hange was doing most of the talking meanwhile Levi just replied with a deadpan "no," making Hange talk even more animatedly.) The four Survey Corps members then hurried back inside Wall Rose, and luckily Sakura felt no more titans on their way back.

Erwin delegated the duties of tending all of their horses to the soldiers on standby, allowing them to head immediately to his office. Almost all the soldiers saluted them on their way there, since by now most were heading down to the mess hall to eat, leaving Sakura a bit uncomfortable; they were saluting everyone _but _her. It's not like she had done anything worthy of deserving their respect yet, but it still made her feel out of place.

Sakura closed the door gently behind her and took a seat next to Hange, Erwin sat at the other side of his desk, and Levi leaned against the window behind Erwin. Mike's imposing image was no longer there, but the air was still slightly oppressive, especially after she processed the interest in their eyes.

"Though I don't know how you came across such ability, I am glad to confirm its validity," the blond began with a much more satisfied expression. Whatever he saw had pleased him greatly, because his shoulders were no longer as uptight and now were a bit more relaxed. "Not to say you weren't an asset before, because you graduated first in your class, correct? And received good comments from Emil Ernst... I know firsthand how hard that is. But sensing titans will definitely come in handy for our expeditions."

Hange stretched in her chair and sighed contentedly. "Well, it's a good thing you're in my squad, Sakura. You'll be quite the asset in locating titans and keeping yourself alive. Maybe now we'll be able to catch one!"

Surprisingly, the commander smiled amusedly. "You're getting a bit ahead of yourself there, Hange."

"What do you mean?"

"He means that she'll be probably joining my squad if she's as good as your two subordinates say she is, Hange," Levi replied with an arrogant smirk.

Erwin furrowed his brows and shook his head. "No, no, her ability falls perfectly in the Scouting Formation category."

"My squad is in charge of patrols before going on expeditions, Erwin. A sensor would not only make our job easier, but reduce our risks. Even after that we're usually the ones sent to take down most of the titans in expeditions."

"And the only way to defeat your enemy is by learning it. You've always said that we couldn't risk men to search for titans and then endanger them again trying to catch one. Well, this reduces one of those risks! We can finally get a test subject!"

"Placing her in the front of the Scouting Formation changes our strategy from a reactive one to a proactive one. That could save countless lives and create even more experienced soldiers. We need a better survival rate."

The three argued back and forth, attacking the others' viewpoints and defending their own. Any other person might've felt excited that three highly respectable members were fighting to have her on their respective squad, but Sakura only felt aggravated that she had no choice. They had not once asked her what she preferred, what she thought was better, who she wanted to be with; they just assumed she had no opinion to begin with, or dismissed it immediately because she didn't have a rank.

Getting used to the Survey Corps was a bit harder than what she expected. In the 102nd Trainees Squad she was a prodigy, respected by everyone, and that meant that her opinion and well-being were heavily considered, sometimes even by her instructors, who were supposed to not care. In here, though, she was just another soldier fighting for her life. Not only that, but no one had once denied she was a prodigy, meaning they were aware she was a genius and they _still _did not give her the time of day. She had never been considered trivial, ever.

Perhaps she really was a brat who did not know better. Maybe she was childish for thinking that people had to immediately care, to respect her instantly. They weren't fully aware of what exactly she was ––and that was good, otherwise she wouldn't be in her commander's office observing this discussion and would instead be in a dungeon meanwhile higher-ups decided her fate in her absence –– but it was because she knew what she was and _they _didn't that she couldn't hold back, couldn't let them ignore her.

She cleared her throat, and three gazes snapped at her, their stares boring into her face. Whether they were incredulous that she had dared interrupt them or simply curious as to what she had to say, she didn't know, and, quite frankly, at the moment she didn't care. She straightened her back and narrowed her eyes slightly, taking control of her beating heart. "I agree with Commander Erwin and believe that my sensor ability would be much useful in the front." Her voice was firm, confident, just exactly the image she wanted to give.

Levi glared at her, but she didn't back down and icily stared back. Though she respected his fighting skill, she did not appreciate his rudeness and general unapproachability. She had to admit that one of the reasons she had chosen Erwin's side over Levi's was because of the bad impression she had of him; teamwork was very important in her books and if she couldn't work with him then she was just wasting her and his time.

The commander was surprised by her impertinence and the darkening of her demeanor. She had been gentle and obedient outside Rose, giving the image of the perfect soldier, so seeing her not only talking out of place but offering an unasked opinion was unexpected. He would let this one slide because her words helped his cause, though perhaps a bit of disciplining in the long run wouldn't hurt. "You aren't concerned about being in the front?"

"I don't plan on dying anytime soon, and I'm not half-bad with 3DMG."

Levi scoffed and started walking towards the door. "The deaths of my teammates will be on your shoulders." With one last glare directed at both Erwin and Sakura, Levi left the room, his steps calm and relaxed, but the kunoichi was perceptive enough to see the tension in his shoulders.

Hange whistled. "Well, prissy pants is a sore loser, who would've known?"

The blond frowned slightly, but managed to give Sakura a small smile. "Don't mind that comment too much. He's just worried about his teammates first and foremost."

That sounded more like a battle of will and pride than a battle for the well-being of his teammates, but she remained quiet, knowing that her comment would be taking it too far. Besides, as much as she disliked the guy, she knew next to nothing about the Captain and it would be too unfair to contest Erwin's opinion of him considering they knew each other for longer.

Still, she didn't like him at all.

* * *

><p>Amina asked Sakura to practice hand-to-hand, considering that the Survey Corps placed more emphasis on it than their instructors did. Their mentality was that their 3DMG skills was half the battle when it came to titans; the other half was made up of reflexes, powerful, and fitness, which were all achieved with a good spar. Indeed, if they couldn't take down a human their own size, what made them think they could take down a titan several times their height and power?<p>

Unlike her other classmates, who paid less attention to martial arts, Sakura focused almost all her time in it, relearning and perfecting her taijutsu. In the first couple of months she spent with Helsa, her body would unwittingly moved at times when she wanted to fight, but she wasn't exactly aware of how she learned things. It helped that she volunteered to teach Mikasa and Eren (and later, Armin), because that sent her down a road in which she analyzed her fighting style. Now nobody knew where she had learned those moves, but everyone was always in awe of her speed and strength, to the point that she was chosen as a sparring proctor for both experienced and rookie soldiers.

"You never told me what how you felt about the expedition."

"It was horrifying. I seriously thought for a couple of moments that I was going to die. I don't want to go back."

Sakura hummed in agreement and aimed a light, high kick to her neck, which she sloppily dodged. "You should've chosen the Garrison, Amina."

Her dark eyes narrowed and she threw a vicious punch at her, which caught her off guard because Amina was usually calmer in her attacks, but nevertheless she easily dodged it. "Are you calling me weak? Worthless?"

"N-No, I never said that. What are you talking about?"

"You don't think I'm able to keep myself safe? Is that it?"

The kunoichi kept dodging her sudden onslaught, too invested in the conversation to retaliate. "Amina, calm down. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying you wouldn't have to worry about dying if you had joined the Garrison, that's all."

Her friend grit her teeth and she suddenly stopped, leaving her standing strangely still in the training grounds. It was a bit hard to see her expression, because the sun was almost down, but Sakura could detect a hint of bitterness in her expression. "Why does everyone think that? That I'm always out for my neck? My dad said it and I thought I had changed, but obviously you think I don't."

"I don't... understand, at all."

"You're not even entirely sure of who I am, right?"

Well, sparring was _obviously _forgotten, seeing as how Amina suddenly plopped down to the grass. Not that Sakura minded, at all; the subject of Amina's origins was a touchy one. She always avoided speaking of her parents whenever Petra or Sakura did, or she conveniently excused herself. Her inquisitive mind had deduced that her family had been recently killed and the subject was too painful to talk about, but before leaving to the expedition she had said her family _lived _inside Wall Sina.

"You're not too talkative about that subject."

She scratched behind her ear, her face a bit embarrassed. "Hm, now that we're here, I guess it wouldn't matter if I told you."

"Stop beating around the bush already. You don't know how much time Petra and I have spent theorizing about this."

Amina blushed harder, and she harshly bit her lower lip. "I didn't know you guys were so curious..."

"Amina."

"Right, right, sorry. My last name is Talman because my father's side of the family came from the desert, before the walls were erected and the titans came. And before you ask, no, my dad never told me anything about the desert because he didn't know anything about it. Anyway, my mom is a Burgeis. Here in the Survey Corps that means nothing, but inside Wall Sina it means the whole world. Suffice to say we're a powerful family.

"My mother was raised in wealth and luxury, but my dad had no such luck and worked hard to rise the social ladder. He married my mother, much to the disdain of the Burgeis, and had me a few years later. Although my grandparents hated my dad, they adored me and the Burgeis family spoiled me rotten to the point I became a brat.

"My dad became ashamed of what I had become and when I turned fifteen he told me I needed a change in my lifestyle and perspective. He made a deal with the Military Police so that I wouldn't do the entrance exam and told me to not come back until I had graduated from the camp. I was obviously very hurt by this, and though he never said I had to graduate with good marks or anything, I strove to become better than the plebs and prove I was superior even though I didn't know anything the average person went through. I wanted to place in the top ten to earn my way back to Sina and prove to my dad that I knew how to work hard."

Though she was intently listening to Amina's story, things suddenly began making sense. The reason behind her physical weakness, her haughtiness, her self-assurance, and the commanding air she carried around her could all be traced back to her noble upbringing. However, there was one gaping hole in her story. "But yet... Here you are."

She sighed and nodded along. "Indeed, here I am... My family has everything anyone could ever desire, but I am here, worrying about my death at the hands of titans."

Her life was what Sakura envisioned for her wards, what she wanted to provide for the people she cared most about in the world. And yet, her friend from a completely different social stratum was sitting next to her in the same grassy field, looking at the same sunset, wondering the same thoughts of survival. She didn't know whether to admire her or be angry at her for throwing such a life many coveted. Sakura frowned; she was being unfair. It was hard being rich, for people strove to become like them but at the same time scorned them for who they were, and when the odd one decided to leave everything behind, people like herself started judging them for their _stupid_ decisions.

"Why are you here then?"

Amina turned slowly to gaze at her intensely, her pensive look long gone. "You. I'm here for you, I'm here for Petra, I'm here for Oluo, I'm here for the Talman and the Burgeis. I have to admit, it was a tough decision, and not placing in the top ten made me seriously think I had no chance at surviving outside the walls and that I was going to surely die, but I couldn't live my life knowing my friends died so that I could live inside parading fancy dresses and being courted by wealthy men... That wasn't the life I wanted anymore."

"What about your dad?"

She looked up to the night sky. The stars were coming out and dinner would be served soon, but Sakura didn't want to rush Amina. "He'll get used to it, I think. This is his fault in some roundabout way after all. My mother... Well, unless she asks the king or something, I don't think she will be able to do much about this. Civilian and military affairs are different for that reason."

"I won't let you be eaten, Amina, I promise. No titan will kill you."

Amina smirked. "That's a hefty promise, considering you are in the front with Commander Erwin."

Sakura blinked, taken aback. She had only told Petra an hour ago because Amina was out, so there was no way their friend could've told her. "How do you know?"

"Word spreads around fast about that pink-haired girl who can sense titans. People honestly believe you can make a difference and that the fatality rate will go down, but how sure are you of that?"

The kunoichi gulped, feeling nervous of the sudden attention and pressure she was getting. She knew that her range was good, but why were people immediately assuming that she would bring about such drastic changes? That just brought an unnecessary burden on her shoulders. "I... I don't want to give anyone false hopes."

"So it's true."

"Amina! No, I don't know if it's true, it's too early to tell."

"You're weird, you know that? But I guess that makes you special in your own way."

She was walking on a fine line between what she abilities she could reveal and the ones she could keep hidden. It was imperative to keep her secrets close to her heart if she wanted to stay around as a normal soldier and protect Mikasa, Eren, and Armin to her heart's content as equals, but at the same time she wasn't ready to deal with the deaths of her friends. There would be a moment where she would have to choose one group over the other. If it came down to it, would she save Petra or Amina or Oluo from death, even if it meant using her medical ninjutsu and being found out? Judging by the promise she had explicitly made Amina (and implicitly to her other two best friends), the answer was yes.

And that answer scared her so much.

* * *

><p>For the next month Sakura trained intensively with Nanaba, the fourth Squad Leader of the Survey Corps. She was ruthless but supportive, always trying to push her to her limits for her own sake. Had her body not been enhanced and fit, she would've probably complained and collapsed from the sheer amount of spars, wooden titan courses, laps, and weight lifting she had done.<p>

Suffice to say she barely had enough time to talk to Amina and Petra, because as soon as she got to her room after a hearty dinner and warm shower she only collapsed on her bed. Not that she didn't know how things were going, since they were chatterboxes, but they didn't get to socialize that often anymore.

The day before the 29th Expedition, Nanaba confided in Sakura that she was not very worried about her survival. She was put in a precarious position, because not only was it necessary to be in the first row of the Scouting Formation to detect incoming titans, but she was also obligated to protect Commander Erwin with her life. However, the Survey Corps had given her Nanaba as a personal trainer to hone her body and increase her survival rate and her ability to be an asset on the field.

Sakura was behind Mike, Erwin, Levi, Nanaba, and Hange in the line as they waited for the gates to open. Haruto kept snorting and moving his head, obviously bored and itching to gallop. Of course he was excited; his natural predators weren't titans and he was going to run his heart's content. Sakura grunted and tightened the reins on Haruto.

"Samson giving you some trouble?" her teammate, Gelgar Becker, asked amusedly. His hair was a sandy brown and the lines of his face were harsh, but the joviality behind his blue eyes gave revealed an inner softness.

She scowled at him. "His name is Haruto."

Her other team member, Otto Langer, snorted and waved his hand disinterestedly. "Come on, you don't expect us to remember a name like that. It sounds just as weird as yours." His dark brown eyes were teasing, letting her know that he didn't mean his words.

Still, Sakura raised her chin, carrying on with the joke. "Well, that just shows how unique my and Haruto's names are."

"Samson," Otto corrected in with a grin.

She tried to deepen her scowl, but failed and laughed openly. "You two are going to be the death of me."

Erwin started the countdown then, effectively shutting them up. After seemingly everlasting seconds, the gate opened and they all spurred their horses forward, leaving a trail of dusk at their wake.

The Special Operations Squad's patrol had disposed of titans in the first couple of kilometers, securing their passage. They had one of the hardest and most dangerous jobs, since they basically searched for fights in open terrains, but at the same time their expertise made their squad one of the safest to be in, since they all had amazing team chemistry and they were led by none other than Levi himself.

After they split up, Sakura hurried Haruto so that they would be less than three strides away from Erwin. The strategy was simple: alert Erwin of incoming titans so that they could change their position. Since she was at the center and her range was less than three kilometers, Erwin still relied on scouts for the Formation's peripherals.

Sakura stiffened when she felt them two and a half kilometers ahead of them, two kilometers to the right, and immediately warned her commander. He nodded and fired a green flare, signifying the change in course. They continued like this, changing course as soon as Sakura warned the presence of a titan or a scout fired a red flare.

Near the end of their ride to their destination, they encountered a slight problem: two titan clusters and the inevitable collision with one of them. The larger one, a a group of nine, was on three kilometers to the left, two kilometers ahead, and had three deviants, meanwhile the one to the right had a group of four and was a kilometer to the right, three and a half kilometers ahead, and had one deviant. Changing the course to the left and avoiding an encounter with the right group would force the left side of the Formation to engage with the titans, incurring guaranteed losses. However, if Erwin changed the course to the right, his squad would come into direct contact with the titans.

"Commander," Otto yelled over the noise, attracting his attention. "We can take care of the issue."

Gelgar nodded firmly. "This is what we trained for! We won't die."

Erwin looked at both his sides, making eye contact with his three subordinates. His icy blue eyes were outwardly calm, but she could tell the conflict that was going on in his head: was the risk worth it? Only Gelgar, Otto, and Sakura would fight; Erwin would stay a safe distance away, only fighting if it was absolutely necessary. As their commander, his safety was top priority.

Maybe he decided that the chances were in their favor, maybe he realized that his squad was elite, or maybe he simply decided to trust in them, because he pointed his flare gun to the right and led them straight to the titans.

Her heart started beating faster and her breaths became harsher as she neared the giants. A four-meter deviant, a seven-meter, a nine-meter, and twelve-meter immediately came after them the moment they spotted their prey. Haruto slowed down a bit, no doubt intimidated by humanity's predators, but he appeared to trust her judgement enough because he kept going forward, regardless of his instincts, surpassing the speed of her teammates' horses. Once she was close enough, she aimed her grappling hooks directly at the eyes of the deviant and advanced forward as soon as they made their mark.

Using a combination of gas intensity and weight shifting, Sakura avoided its hands and landed on top of its bald head. She ran to the back of its skull and jumped in the air, using chakra to increase the height and twist herself in the air, and attached the grappling hook to its nape, slicing through it with ease. The other twelve-meter class tried to reach for her, but she dove straight down to the ground, narrowly dodging its hands. Seconds before hitting the ground she sent her grappling hook straight through the titan's left hand, stopping her descent.

Just as she expected, the pain (or suddenness of the attack; Sakura wasn't sure if they could feel pain like she could) made it jerk its hand skyward, trying to get rid of the hook, taking Sakura along for a convulsive ride, immediately using her chakra to heighten all her reflexes and senses. Once she was sufficiently high up in the sky and with enough momentum, she let go of the hook and was sent flying behind the titan. She twisted her body around to fire the hooks to the neck, even if she was upside down. Still, the kill was clean, and she landed on the ground gently, the blood evaporating from her green cloak.

The kunoichi felt the fall of two more titans and turned around to see her two teammates safe and sound. They each had taken down their own titan, demonstrating their prowess and agility.

"Holy shit you took down the deviant and twelve-meter without touching the ground..." Otto said, his voice awed. "How in the hell?"

"Fast reflexes," she answered, suddenly uncomfortable at the attention.

"Those were some advanced moves. Are you sure you're a rookie?"

Erwin and his white horse approached Gelgar. Behind him were their three horses, calm and snorting happily. At least they hadn't run away like most did. "I'm sure it would be unfair to classify her as a rookie by now," he interjected, his voice warm. "We won't worry too much about your well-being anymore."

Sakura mounted Haruto and smiled sincerely, glad to no longer be considered inexperienced or in need of babying. Though she knew it was simply a consequence of keeping the majority of her potential hidden, she still didn't want to be regarded as the weak link, someone to be looked after. At least no one would regard her as a weakling anymore.

The rest of the expedition went by with only four losses. They reached one of the supply camps they had established in earlier expeditions and decided to rest there. The night watch groups took the job of looking out for any abnormal activity meanwhile the others rested. The outlook of the Survey Corps was bright, everyone was in a good mood, and success was imminent.

* * *

><p><em>"So you inherited the chakra nature of your father? Good, water is good. I expect good things from you, Sakura. Suguru has made us very proud, and with much gratitude we call him our son. Earn your place in our family, because you can do it."<em>

* * *

><p>Sakura felt a breeze in her hair and unwittingly woke up. Her camping mates, two women whose names she couldn't quite remember, where still sleeping soundly, completely unaware of her harsh breathing.<p>

She knew she had dreamed something important, but as soon as she woke up the exact details faded into nothingness, as if completely forgotten. It was impossible for there to be wind inside their tent, because there was no wind outside, but maybe something had happened that she was unaware of.

Sakura tried going back to sleep but failed. Whether it was because her excitement or disappointment or wonder at the the mystery, her body no longer felt tired. She took off the sheets from her body and dressed herself in her uniform, feeling uncomfortable going out in her nightgown. It had taken her an hour to put on all the belts the first time she had tried to fully dress herself. The belts were supposed to be tight and connected to every part of her body. Sometimes they snapped back into previous positions, other times she couldn't stretch them enough to get through, and there were other times where she simply didn't know where to put her limbs.

Luckily, practice made permanent, so now it only took her twenty minutes on a bad day. It would be sunrise soon, anyway, so might as well get her blades and 3DMG ready.

The camp was a bit eery in the darkness, the lack of noise and danger getting to her. Titans were more inactive at night than day, but that didn't mean they couldn't be attacked. That is why they had seven of their one hundred twelve stationed for night duty. They were usually in the middle of the formation, one of the safest places in order to secure their survival.

She didn't feel like explaining to others why she was out, so she used her kunoichi tact and agility to remain hidden. It was almost too easy to wander camp undetected, but for some reason the tent that housed their supplies was heavily guarded, if the two chakra presences inside the tent were of any indication. If she wanted to practice her skills, she would have to do it without weapons. Was it a risk worth taking? She could just go back to her room and rest, but at the same time she needed to practice. She hadn't been able to train her ninjutsu the past month because her sessions with Nanaba had consumed all her stamina. But now... There might not be a better time.

They had camped close to a forest of giant trees so that worse comes to worse, they could all fight in a place with high maneuverability and launch a counteroffensive. This was the third forest she had seen like that, but there was no concrete explanation for the size of the trees. Sakura leaped to the first branch and started going to a more secluded place, mindful to leave a trail just in case she forgot the way back. Once she was sufficiently far away, she started going over the hand seals for the three jutsu she knew and performing them to the best of her ability.

When she had stayed with Helsa, she had found out that her chakra reserves were a bit low, but after training constantly for almost seven years the amount of chakra she had at her disposal had tripled. Now her limit was seven jutsu, but she knew that she still hadn't pushed her body enough and there was room for improvement.

After she finished _**Suiton: Bakusui Shoha**_, she felt a deviant's chakra around three kilometers from her, moving at great speeds towards their camp. She looked up and noticed that the sky had lightened, signifying the start of dawn. She knew that the night watch would eventually take down this deviant, but it was almost guaranteed that someone would die in the process.

She body-flickered closer to the titan and started leaping from tree branch to tree branch, trying to keep up with the giant. She may have her 3DMG, but she was weaponless, rendering it useless. At the same time, fighting a titan without 3DMG and only relying on her reflexes and chakra was a bad call on her part, since aerial fighting was hard with their unpredictability and size. If she wanted to use her powers, she only had one shot before the titan potentially retaliated.

Sakura saw the ten-meter deviant sprinting and she herself started leaping faster until she was ahead of it. She threw herself at it, but miscalculated the distance and landed on its lower neck, a bit too far away from the actual spot. She tried to move, to stand up, but the titan was moving at such great speeds that the momentum kept her clutching the titan's lower neck with her chakra-enhanced hands.

The camp was very close now, which bore bad news for Sakura, not only because it might kill some of her comrades, but she would have to explain why she was breaking protocol and potentially attracting titans. Her fingertips barely reached the area in the nape that could kill titans, meaning she couldn't punch it and instantly kill it.

The intensity of the chakra she was using to fight against the momentum and stick to the titan made her body glow lightly blue. She could feel her already-low reserves getting even emptier, taking away precious energy she could use later on the day. Couldn't she use chakra on the offensive, anyway?

Sakura focused the chakra on her hands until it resembled a small, sharp blade. Though her mind didn't recall ever doing this, her body remembered performing this countless times, probably to save lives. But this technique had a more insidious effect than just saving lives. No, it was a blade, and it could be used to cut just like any other weapon.

She couldn't crawl, but she could certainly reach a little bit more to touch the nape and slice the titan twice. She cursed her small height and stretched her arm the furthest she could. Once she reached the threshold, she slid her fingertips from right to left, the lower from left to right, and the effect was instantaneous. Though outwardly it looked as if nothing had happened, the focused chakra on her hands had cut the deviant's muscles and tendons, creating the same effect as if she had cut it with a blade. It was a Chakra Scalpel. Suffice to say it was a very clean kill.

Unfortunately, the titan immediately fell down and crashed against a tree, the sound so loud it definitely woke up the whole camp, especially with how close they were to it. Luckily the same body that had given her such trouble shielded her from most of the impact, but she still felt a bit dizzy going from such blinding speeds to a complete stop.

Her sensitive ears picked up the telltale sign of 3DMG usage, meaning that people had heard and were investigating already. Rather than explain how she killed a titan without the use of blades or 3DMG, Sakura jumped higher up to the trees and hid herself amongst the leaves. A couple of seconds later the Special Operations Squad appeared and cut off the titan's nape, even though the it was already steaming and decomposing.

Levi stood next to the neck, and though Sakura could not see his expression, she knew he was in deep thought.

"Captain, the titan was already dead when we got here," one of the squad members, a woman named Liesel Sommer, reported to the black-haired man.

"I can see that." His usually monotone voice was tinged with annoyance. "The question is _why. _Why is this shithead dead without being hit in the nape of the neck? Or, better yet, _how_? In this case, the result doesn't matter; the process does."

"And then what do we do?" Jung Busch asked, though not impolitely. "Do we capture the person who killed the titan and saved some of our lives?"

"I hope you're not telling me that we shouldn't investigate simply because we don't know what to do to whoever did this, because that's stupid. It's possible that it's an animal that can kill titan, and wouldn't you want to have an animal like that at your disposal? Or it could be a human with an ability we have never seen before. Whatever it is, using it to our advantage is what we want."

His squad quieted down after that and started searching the area a bit more intensely. Levi himself looked around with his calculating eyes. There was a moment she thought she had been found out because he had looked right at her, but her fears were erased when he didn't react and kept surveying the area.

Levi sighed and shook his head. "There's no use in looking for it. We're never going to find it in this giant ass forest and there's no time to waste right now. Let's go and report this to Erwin."

Once she was sure they were gone Sakura headed back to the camp and easily slipped without notice due to the commotion the deviant had caused. Theories were running rampant, citing that maybe the titan ran out of sunlight or there was a sickness that only affected them, but whatever the speculation was it only served to heighten their spirits, saying this was one step for humanity.

Sakura only felt uncomfortable about this. Even though her comrades approved of what she had done, she couldn't help but think back to what Levi had said about her existence. She would be _at their disposal _or _used to their advantage_. She understood the mentality behind it, but she couldn't get rid of the aspects that made her human. Sacrifices had to be made for the betterment of humanity, but it wasn't such an easy decision to make when it was _her _sacrifice that was being called into question. _  
><em>

Besides, she had promises to keep. Mikasa, Armin, and Eren needed her around as a source of comfort and protection, and the only way she could keep Petra, Oluo, and Amina safe was by being on the same leagues as them, socializing with them, practicing with them. Making her a weapon would affect them just as much as it would affect her.

Four days later and the 29th Expedition was labeled another success for humanity, bringing back only eight deaths, mostly because of the improved titan detection system. It was with this that Sakura felt content with what she was doing.

This was as much as she could give back, because the rest wasn't hers to give.

The Survey Corps would have to be content with a sensor.

* * *

><p><strong>For the titan scene, the reason why Sakura didn't punch it was because since she was attached vertically to it, punching it would've sent them both flying forwards. I don't think she would've liked being attached to the titan on the ride.<strong>

**I know about the story of Kaguya and how it conflicts with this story because there is no God Tree in SnK universe, therefore no possibility of anyone having chakra. However, personally, I think this is more of a legend than a historical fact, and if it is a historical fact then it's a pretty shitty one because it leaves a bunch of plot holes like how is it that all living things have chakra if they never got it from the God Tree and if only humans get chakra then it doesn't explain how Summons have chakra. So, in the end, The Vessel's stance on chakra is that all living things have chakra to some degree, meanwhile only certain individuals have chakra points, granting them the ability to mould chakra, and this was what the Sage and Kaguya inherited from the God Tree. I usually stick with canon for explanations on how certain things came to be but I couldn't stick with this one fact because I severely dislike creation stories that don't make any sense. **

**Yet again, an innumerable amount of thanks to PinchofSalt, Bum reviews, cj1of4, Basia Orci, Faeleen Giang Tien, animagirl, UchihaNaruTeme4, levantein, LadyRidger, PinKrystal, AmeRaSora, Guest, lazylady, Liber Fatum, brokenmaelstrom, Guest, Alumi, Yuyui, Demon Flame, FairiesDescent, Rose Rain 7, and lilazngirlz. Your reviews are a delight to read and make me warm. Also, thank you to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites! I'm glad this project has piqued your attention.**


	8. SOS

The 34th Expedition had seen the loss of three whole teams, hitting the morale of the Survey Corps rather deeply. It was something that none of them could've prevented; Erwin had to call some tough decisions and in the end the losses had been minimized, but it still hurt most of the people, who no longer were accustomed to such losses.

This brought a different dynamic to the Survey Corps, though. On her way to the mess hall, she noticed more soldiers saluting her rather eagerly, their eyes shining with admiration and pride. Some had even taken to call her Team Leader Sakura, even though she didn't hold any spots of authority in the hierarchy of the military.

"Ah, well, look at that. Team Leader Pinky has graced us with her presence!" Oluo said with a snort.

That didn't stop her friends from teasing her about it, though.

Sakura put down her tray of food brusquely next to Petra and sat down, glaring at her friend. "You idiot, stop calling me that."

"But you get such an authority kick out of it. I'm just doing you a favor."

"I'll beat your ass next time we spar."

Petra sighed and spoke up in a motherly tone, "Guys, please, let's try to not hurt each other. I don't want to deal with you two when you fight."

"And don't act like kids," Amina pitched in, much more coldly than Petra. "It embarrasses us."

The two still scowled at each other, but inside they had to restrain their laughter. Part of the fun in their little spats was annoying both Amina and Petra, Miss Impatience and Miss Patience, respectively.

"Do you think we'll have an expedition tomorrow?" Petra asked. "The weather is really cold and it looks like it's gonna snow soon."

"I don't know," Amina responded with a small frown. "All I know is that I can't fight very well with these coats. They're so heavy." The Survey Corps gave them a gray coat, heavy pants, black boots, a red scarf, and red gloves as their uniform for the cold winter months. Still, most of the fighting was done with light clothes since maneuverability depended heavily on speed and lightness.

"Hm, who knows. Anyway, the report from the Special Operations Squad will let us know in the end," Oluo said with a disinterested wave.

Sakura was not very worried about the verdict. Either way, she usually didn't fight with titans because Erwin's team avoided contact with them above all. In the six expeditions she had done with him, she had only killed five, and two of those had come from her first expedition in his squad, the 29th. Oluo, Petra, and Amina had surpassed her kill count, and they had only gone on three expeditions out of the required five for the year; she was sure they were in the lower tens by now. However, her prowess in fighting was something many had heard about, since she kept her skills in top shape during training.

Amina finished her stew first, noting that the meat was especially juicy. She then said she had to help get the horses ready for tomorrow's (possible) expedition and left them all quickly. Petra finished second and left the mess hall to help Amina, claiming that an extra hand couldn't hurt, leaving Sakura alone with Oluo.

"When are you going to tell her that you love her?"

Oluo choked on his stew and started coughing harshly. Sakura leaned in and patted him awkwardly from across the table, trying to hold in her amusement but failing miserably. "I-I-I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Please, I'm more perceptive than Amina and Petra put together and multiplied by two. And you're shitty at hiding your emotions."

It was the first time Sakura had seen Oluo blush so brilliantly. "So what if I like her," he said with a pout.

"You mean love."

"Argh! Yes! Whatever, that."

"You still haven't answered my question. When are you going to tell her?"

"Never."

"Why not? And please don't say 'I don't want to ruin my friendship with her' because I'll kick you in the ass right now."

Oluo frowned at her, his eyes flustered. "I can't just tell her! What if..." He sighed and visibly calmed down. "I'm just scared. What if something happens to me... Or worse, what if something happens to her? It hurts just thinking about it."

Though she completely understood his point, it still saddened her that he was restraining his feelings. She had already decided that romantic relationships were out of the picture until Armin, Eren, and Mikasa were fully grown-up, so she didn't have to worry about that. Even if someone came along, she wouldn't dedicate the person enough time to make it serious. But her friends were another story... "So you're going to be ruled by your fear?"

"That doesn't mean I won't do anything about it... I'm just waiting for both of us to retire, when we're finally safe, to actually do something."

"But by then another man could've stolen her heart. Didn't you think of that?"

He seemed surprised by this situation, as if he had never considered it before, but his expression then hardened. "Even if that happens, I'll still do that. I'll be happy if she's happy, even if it's not with me."

Sakura grimaced, repulsed, and shook her head. "Ugh, and you denied being in love? Old man, you're so deep in you can't even see your way out."

The blush came back with fervor, making Oluo look away. "And you were wondering why I didn't want to admit it. You're just embarrassing me."

"I can't help but think this situation is disgustingly adorable. It's the best friends in love scenario, except only one of them is actually in love." The two ate their stew in silence, the air surprisingly less tense than before. "Hmm... I respect your decision and all, but if you ever need help with getting Petra just ask me. I can make her see the truth once or twice."

Oluo stared at her in surprise, but then the corners of his mouth lifted up in a sincere smile, making his face look much younger than what it usually looked like. "Thank you, Sakura."

"You know, I can count with my hand the number of times you've called me by my name."

"Well, don't get used to it, Pinky. This is a once-in-a-lifetime type deal."

They finished their stew at the same time and left the plates for those unlucky souls who were on kitchen duty. They agreed on sparring, since talking about it had awakened the desire to kick each other's asses, especially after the heart-to-heart conversation they had. Walking down the spacious hallways at this time, it was almost impossible to miss the short Captain.

And boy did he look pissed. And wounded, if the blood on his face and his slight limp was of any indication.

Once he was safely out of an earshot, Oluo leaned down and whispered, "Did he glare at you?"

"I thought he glared at you!"

"Me? What did I do?"

"I don't know! You tell me."

They both threw their hands up in the air at the same time and continued walking to the training fields, their aggravation fueling their desire to fight. Once they reached an empty field they carefully put their half-jackets on a bench and got into position, each of them waiting for the other to attack.

Oluo was the only one out of the people she usually sparred with that could keep up with her. It was not because he was any better than most (though he was still very talented in the Survey Corps), but because he knew her fighting style better than everyone else. He knew she was a reactive fighter who could easily beat any proactive fighter to a pulp, so he had a separate strategy just for her.

Their spars were boring for any passerby because neither of them started immediately. It was an incredibly taxing experience for both of them, though. Their bodies were coiled, ready to react, and their eyes followed the other's body for any sudden movements. The battle of wills and anticipation was more intense than any physical fight, since their minds ran wild in these moments, both of them wondering one thing: who will throw the first punch?

Even though Sakura always won, it was a understood between both of them that whenever she had to throw the first hit was when Oluo won, regardless of the outcome of the spar.

She had the advantage in this match because she had agitated Oluo before the fight started, so in the end she won. Still, Oluo had swallowed down his pride and asked for a little taijutsu lesson which ended up consuming their entire evening. By the time he blocked his first roundhouse kick it was already time for dinner. After they picked up their jackets, they went back on their way to the mess hall.

The hallways were full whispers and murmurs. Her sensitive ears got the gist of the story, and the contents were a bit alarming. Apparently two members of the Special Operations Squad had died in the last patrol due to unusual titan activity. They had been caught unaware, and although Levi and the two others had survived, Jung and Liesel underwent the traumatic experience of watching their long-time teammates and friends be eaten.

A soldier suddenly appeared in front of them and saluted, though the show of respect was mainly directed at her. "Leade–– I mean, Sakura Ackerman, you are requested in Commander Erwin's office."

Oluo gave her a confused stare but Sakura only shrugged in return, just as clueless as he was. The pink-haired kunoichi nodded firmly at the older soldier, dismissing her.

"Save me something to eat, will you?"

"If the food's shit, sure; if it's good, no promises."

Sakura sighed and nodded to his conditions, knowing it was the risk she had to take for asking Oluo to get her some food. She turned back and hurried towards her commander's office, her mind running with different scenarios as to why she had been summoned. She usually didn't see Erwin outside expeditions, since he was either locked in his office or training with Levi or inside Wall Sina fighting for more funds or giving reports. Most of the training duties for the Survey Corps fell on the Squad Leaders and Senior Team Leaders, but the system worked so nobody complained.

She knocked and opened to knob when she heard the command to enter. It still grated on her nerves a bit on how she had to follow protocol and be submissive, but the attitudes had gotten better after people had heard of her prowess and skill. She understood the importance of command, it was just hard to treat an authority figure weaker than herself with the proper respect.

Much to her surprise, a cleaned Levi was sitting with his legs crossed in front of Erwin's desk. Upon opening the door he turned his head sideways and stared at her dispassionately, but she could notice the faint edge in his shoulders. Sakura tramped to Erwin's desk and reluctantly took the other seat next to Levi's, the tension almost palpable. Whatever had been going on was not good.

"Hello, Sakura. I hope your day went well," Erwin began amiably, eyeing her hair openly.

She ran a hand through her short pink locks and inwardly grimaced when some pieces of grass appeared on her hands. Now that she was aware of it, her whole uniform was dirty and she didn't exactly smell like roses. She could almost feel the reproach and repulse coming from Levi, which did nothing but add to her discomfort. "It was productive, sir."

The answer amused him, because he allowed a small smile briefly before it disappeared into a firm line. "I called you in because there has been a request for your transfer."

Sakura cocked her head to the side, confused. Why would he request her transfer? Wasn't she doing a good job in the front of the formation, warning them of oncoming titans? Sure, sometimes it was inevitable and the peripherals still dealt with the titans out of her radius of detection, but there had been an improvement.

"Are my results unsatisfactory?"

Erwin frowned more deeply. "No, the results are better than what I expected, actually. It's just... Levi, explain what happened."

She almost flinched when her gaze locked with the Captain's. It had been foolish of her to assume that his eyes had been emotionless when she first entered, because there was such a deep rage in those silver eyes that made it hard to not shiver. "We were on patrol, clearing the way for tomorrow's expedition, when eleven of those big shits came out of nowhere, running at us as if their asses were on fire. They ate Hugh and Franz before any of us could say 'fuck,' and after that it was three against seven."

Levi then turned back to Erwin, staring at him meaningfully, as if challenging him to something.

The blond sighed and nodded. "In light of this situation, Levi and I agreed that it would be best for you to transfer to the Special Operations Squad. Their duties are far riskier than any of the others in the Formation, and in the end their lives save more than I can count. It is in our best interest to keep them alive and healthy as well as we can."

Though she understood their positions, she still didn't want to join the Special Operations Squad. They lived separately from the rest of the Survey Corps because they had different training, duties, and protocol than the rest of them. The only times she might see her friends would be during lunch and dinner, and that wasn't even guaranteed because schedules were different.

She couldn't use this as her excuse, though; it was selfish and it would make her sound childish in front of her superiors.

"What will happen to the Formation?"

"My squad has different orders than the others. They are told to 'avoid them at all costs,' meanwhile our instructions are 'to kill them at all costs.' So you will lead us right into them. If that's your excuse, you better think of a better one," Levi replied in his monotone voice.

"But then how is Commander Erwin going to change the direction of the Formation?"

Though his mouth was set in a firm line, Sakura could tell that Erwin understood her concerns and agreed with her inwardly. "We'll figure out a way, don't worry. We'll have to revert to the old model until we can devise new way, but I think it will be better for the Survey Corps if you take care of the titans preemptively."

Her shoulders visibly deflated, knowing that she had lost this fight. To think that the spar she had with Oluo earlier that day would be her last, that the lunch she shared with her friends might not happen, that Gelgar and Otto might die without her around to watch out for them... It made her want to punch something in her anger.

She knew that this wouldn't have happened if she had kept her sensor ability hidden, but she couldn't deny that she felt good about saving countless lives by avoiding danger to begin with. Maybe this way she could save even more people without becoming an outright weapon, the perfect balance between power and responsibility.

"Well, starting tomorrow you should move your things to the Special Operations Squad's wing. I'm sure Levi will help you with the transition. There will be no expedition tomorrow because of bad weather reports, but be prepared with your new team because we'll be leaving in the next two or three weeks. You are dismissed."

She stiffly got up and took large steps to the door, careful to not break it in her anger. She was almost out when her commander's voice called her.

"You have done a great job and you have my sincere thanks for everything you've done, Sakura."

She allowed a smile to grace her features and she nodded, leaving the room without a second glance.

Telling Petra and Amina that they were getting a new roommate was one of the hardest things she had done in the past year. They knew what it meant to be placed in the Special Operations Squad, the one with the most experienced soldiers with the most dangerous missions. The three friends had spent almost the whole night talking, making up for lost time, and making promises to not let this hurdle destroy their friendship.

They helped her pack her things, which consisted mostly of civilian clothes and a couple of letters from Eren, Mikasa, and Armin that she had kept. They repeatedly asked for advice, for her well-being, for how things were in the Survey Corps, and she in turn asked if their classes were going well, if they were missing anything, if they were healthy. Now that she was here and she knew firsthand about the Survey Corps's situation, she was more partial to Eren's decision to joining. They would be joining in two summers, after all.

A sharp knock on the door interrupted their chat. Sakura opened it, revealing a woman taller than her with matted blonde hair. There were black bags under her eyes and her green orbs were puffy and dull. "You are Sakura Ackerman, right?" she asked in a small, frail voice. Sakura gritted her teeth and nodded. "I'm Liesel Sommer, your new... teammate."

It was obvious that she was in the beginning stages of mourning. She remembered how hard it had been for her to completely process Helsa, Mikoto, and Kalura's deaths. It was as if a void had suddenly appeared and she didn't know how to fill it, or even if it was possible to. "I'm sorry for your losses."

She nodded absentmindedly, as if not registering her sentiments, but Sakura knew that those words made the loneliness a bit more bearable. "Do you need any help?"

Sakura whirled around and nodded at Petra and Amina. The two girls lifted one of her two boxes and handed one to Sakura and Liesel. "Yes, I only have these two. You can help me with this one."

Liesel took the box wordlessly and started ambling through the hallways. Sakura put her box down and hugged her two friends tightly. "I'll see you two around, okay?"

"Yeah, this is not the end, don't worry," Petra assured with a small smile.

"And worse comes to worst, write us and drop the letters off in our room. Make sure to tell us where your room is so we can do the same."

"That's actually a great idea! Well, I better go now before Liesel grows impatient."

Catching up to her new teammate hadn't been hard, since she had decided to wait for her. The walk to their new room was quiet and heavy. Sakura knew better than to try to strike small talk with a person who was mourning, because emotions and thoughts were in a constant turmoil of despair and distress. In fact, it would be even harder to talk to her right now, since she might see her as a sort of replacement for the teammates she had recently lost.

The Special Operations Squad's hallway was secluded and reserved for the five members of the squad, including Levi. They had their own titan killing course with an elevated difficulty, their own schedule, their own training exercises, and their own expectations. The amount of diligence and hard work each member poured to the team was incredible and far outclassed the other squads'. It was for this reason that it was a great honor to be hand-picked, but at the same time the honor brought new challenges and dangers.

Sakura's room was more spacious than her previous one and all for herself. She had a desk with an inkwell and quill to write her reports, a larger bed, and a whole closet just for herself. Still, as great as the room was, she still felt slightly empty not seeing Amina lounging around reading a book or Petra folding last week's laundry they had forgotten to do.

"Captain Levi wants to see you after you're done unpacking. His office is down the hallway to the right. If you have any questions, I'm next door to the right."

"Thanks, Liesel."

The blonde woman stared at her for a few seconds before nodding in acknowledgement and leaving to her own room.

She didn't have that many clothes to begin with, so it was easy to store them all. The shirts she usually wore underneath her half jacket were usually white, but there were some greens and browns and yellows here and there. Her breast bindings came next, though there really wasn't much to restrain. Not that she minded; some of the stuns she pulled would be almost impossible if she had too much weight on her chest.

It was weird seeing her room so clean. She and Amina were sometimes really messy to the point that Petra had to baby them and chastise them. Sakura herself wasn't too keen on keeping her room clean, but order was almost a must; she needed to know where every single piece of clothing was for her mental well-being. Amina... Well, Amina was neither clean nor orderly, which was fine because Petra and Sakura picked up the slack.

Sakura made her way to her new captain's office. She knocked twice before a deadpan voice told her to come in, which she immediately did. He looked even smaller sitting behind the desk, but she would be lying if she said she couldn't sense the aura of power he gave off. He beckoned her to sit down across from him, and she did as told, though a bit reluctantly.

"Starting tomorrow you'll be joining us for training. It starts promptly at seven thirty, so don't be late. I do room inspections every week on a random day, so don't live like a pig and we'll have no problems. You will receive an increase in pay, but don't start jumping up and down because it definitely does not make up for all the shit you'll go through. You are no longer required to have cleaning, kitchen, laundry, or stable duties, but I expect you to use this time to keep your gear ready and functional. Any questions?"

She thought he would list a bunch of unreasonable demands just to make her life miserable, but so far all of what she had heard was very sound, except for the part of having a clean room; she didn't know how having a tidy room equated with more titan kills. Not only that, he didn't look angry at her, like she had predicted. He looked tired, as if there was an incredible burden on his shoulders, and she was more than sure that he definitely did.

"Who... I know Liesel Sommer and Jung Busch are the other surviving members, but who is the fifth member of the squad?"

"I haven't decided yet." His head gestured towards the stack of papers in his desk, which suspiciously looked like soldiers' profiles.

"I have no more questions then. If you would excuse me."

"Sakura."

She jolted, surprised to hear her name coming from him. Levi had avoided calling her name for the longest time to the point she secretly thought that he had a problem remembering people's names, just like her. "Yes, Captain?"

"What is your range right now?"

"Three kilometers."

He leaned back into his chair, interested. "So it increased. Any reason why?"

Well, she had been training her butt off to increase her chakra reserves and to perfect her forgotten ninjutsu so maybe that had something to do with it. Of course, she couldn't tell him that, but luckily she had grown to be quite the expert at telling half-truths. "I meditate... It expands my focus and for some reason my range."

"Then make sure to leave some time from your day to meditate. We're relying on your sensing abilities for patrol, remember that. You are dismissed."

Sakura wasn't very sure what to do with herself on her unexpected day off, so she took the hour-long walk to the nearest district, Trost. Her three wards were stationed close to this district, but the chances of running into them were almost impossible. Still, she was on the lookout for any kids taller than her wearing two crossed swords on their backs.

She went to the marketplace and felt her heart clench painfully when she saw all the stalls lined up, selling fresh produce and all other kinds of things. She reminisced about her times with Erick, charming her customers to buy their potatoes or barley, carrying their cart all the way from their house to Beinn, greeting Mikasa and Mikoto after a hard day's work. The man that had sold her Mikasa's birthday present at a discounted rate, the blacksmith who begrudgingly lowered the price of Mikasa's dagger, Berdine who always bought their vegetables without a second thought, Anton and his haggard mother... They were all probably dead by now, eaten by titans, and Beinn was probably a deserted town that only Mikasa and Sakura remembered, a town that housed the memories of the first two years of her life.

Sakura liked to consider herself strong. She needed to be strong for her wards, for her friends, for the responsibilities she had, but it was in moments like this that she felt bad for herself. She didn't like to think that and felt disgusted with herself afterwards, but it still happened, especially seeing all of these people happily doing business with each other, either unaware or removed from the hardships of many others. In a way, the reason why she fought so hard and so much was so that people like the citizens of Trost could continue their blissfully ignorant lives, away from the pain.

Her feet moved towards the stall that sold potatoes and started conversing with the man. He had recently become a father to a beautiful daughter, and he was trying to make some good coin to give her and his wife the best possible life he could manage. Sakura's heart broke a bit more at the cruel irony of having another reminder of the Ackermans and bought a pound's worth of potatoes.

She overpaid him for them but hoped that he wouldn't notice, because if he was anything like Erick, he would refuse to receive payment for something he wasn't selling. He did discern the extra silver but instead of giving it back to her he simply grinned at her fully and thanked her greatly, saying that times were still tough and that her charity was very helpful.

Sakura didn't know whether to be glad that his daughter would receive more food or to be disappointed he wasn't more like Erick.

But perhaps she was being unfair, because Erick was dead and there was no one like him or Mikoto or Kalura or Helsa.

* * *

><p>Waking up at six thirty wasn't as hard as she had predicted. One of the perks of having a separate wing was the lack of people in the bathroom; she only had to share with Liesel and that was it. After doing her business and putting on her uniform, she went to the mess hall and got her breakfast of butter bread with a glass of milk, but she didn't quite enjoy it because almost everyone except those on cooking duty were asleep, since their training started at eight thirty.<p>

She knew she still had a couple of minutes to spare, but she still headed to the training field reserved for her team. Jung Busch, a man in his late twenties with shabby black hair and dark brown eyes, was already stretching; Liesel was running laps around the rather large perimeter; Levi was leaning against one of the trees at the edge of the field, observing.

It was as if a spell had been broken, because her two teammates immediately stopped and stared at her. They both looked empty, defeated, and it made her feel bad that here she was, replacing one of the people they had laughed with, fought with, enjoyed life with. Still, it wasn't her fault, so she steeled her gaze and plodded towards them.

"We usually start with a spar," Liesel announced quietly. "Since it would be unfair to put you against Jung or the Captain, I'll be your partner."

Sakura was initially confused with this statement, but then realized that the Special Operations Squad was so isolated from the rest of the Survey Corps that they probably didn't know much about her besides what was on her report, and what her report contained was the meager five kills in six expeditions, a laughable number to them. They probably didn't read how she killed those five titans, but then again, who would?

They probably thought her an amateur, but she couldn't find it within herself to be angry.

Liesel got into a stance first, but Sakura only relaxed her muscles. The blonde must've been in a really impatient mood because she launched a high kick aimed at her face which she easily dodged by leaning back. She probably thought it was a fluke because she launched a punch aimed at her abdomen with the same sloppiness, but she only pivoted her body sideways to dodge that.

She finally met her eyes, surprised, but then they narrowed when she finally caught on that Sakura wasn't an amateur who got accepted just because of her sensor abilities. Now her moves were graceful and full of the intent to land a hit, but she was still too slow and sloppy for her kunoichi reflexes and eyes.

Sakura got bored of the spar after she analyzed all of her weaknesses. During a side kick it took Liesel a while to put her foot back on the floor and regain her balance, so after she attempted her attack she caught the foot with her hand and swept her supporting leg underneath her, causing her to fall instantly.

Liesel stared at her from the ground, shocked, but before she could ask Sakura only extended her hand to her, though she didn't take it. "How... How did you know I was going to do that?"

"Your eyes gave away your intent."

"Exactly what I told you months ago," Levi said, suddenly next to them. "I told these two that you only had five kills to your name to test how overconfident they got. Liesel, you were lucky Sakura gave you a warning early in the game; she could've defeated you in that first move. Mistakes like that cost lives."

The blonde woman grunted and looked away, embarrassed. Especially after losing a teammate the day before, the captain's words were especially harsh on her. She wasn't exactly sure about the circumstances around their deaths, but guilt did a nasty thing to one's consciousness.

Sakura shook her arm slightly, reminding Liesel that it was there. The blonde woman took it begrudgingly and with a slight glare directed at her, Liesel left the training field. Jung called after her, but when she kept walking away he only offered an apologetic smile before running after her.

"Hm, they leave without my permission. Insubordinate brats." The moment was completely inappropriate, but the idea of calling such seasoned soldiers brats by a man of his size made it really hard to fight a smile. Levi must've noticed this, because his eyes narrowed at her. "What are you smiling at?"

"Nothing, Captain."

"Tch, make that three. Well, nothing is going to get done today with that display so might as well go meet the next member of the Squad. We only have three weeks tops to get him ready, after all."

Her eyes perked at the statement. Yesterday, when she had been called to his office, there had been a huge stack of papers sitting on his desk, but if he said he had already picked their new teammate… Well, that spoke a lot of both his dedication and diligence.

Levi was already in the hallway of the open building when he looked back at her. "Are you coming or not?"

Their stroll was silent, but not entirely uncomfortable. Sakura didn't know what to think of her Captain, and she had the feeling that Levi didn't know what to make of her either. The only thing Sakura was sure about him was his prowess in fighting, but the rest of his personality was shrouded in a deep fog. She got the same impression from Liesel and Jung, with whom she still hadn't talked to. Surprisingly, those two made her feel more restless and unwelcome than the acerbic and cold Captain Levi. The worst part was that she didn't even know what she did wrong other than joining their Squad, and that was even against her own volition. What was she supposed to do, anyway?

The training fields were divided by squads, with each squad having an assigned field. Sakura, Oluo, Petra, and Amina had been in Squad Four, Hange's squad, but Levi was leading them to the training grounds of Squad Two, Mike's squad. Almost one hundred soldiers under his command were training, their exercises led by a Team Leader Sakura had never seen before in her life.

People turned their heads and gaped at them both, but Levi paid them no mind. Sakura understood their wonder; it was hard to see the Captain traverse these parts of the headquarters, and whenever people did see him it was only for a moment, since he always appeared to be on a hurry.

Levi walked to the Team Leader and asked, "I am looking for Eld Jinn. Where is he?"

She pointed to the left, her eyes wary. "He is in charge of the fifth section."

He nodded his thanks and trudged in the direction the brunette had signaled them. A blond man with a tied ponytail was instructing a black-haired boy on how to properly land a roundhouse kick when Levi decided to step in and interrupt them.

"You are Eld Jinn, correct?"

He jumped slightly and shivered. "Captain Levi! Yessir, I am Eld Jinn."

Sakura noted the similarities in the black-haired boy's expression and Eld's with amusement; Levi did inspire that kind of nervousness when people first met him.

"Good. Starting tomorrow you will be under my squad."

His eyes widened and he spluttered, "Sir?"

"Captain," he corrected mildly. "The letter with detailed instructions should be in your room soon, but I believed it was a good idea to introduce you to your new squad as soon as possible since we're going on an expedition soon."

"That's in less than three weeks, si–– Captain. I don't think I'll be––"

Levi's gray eyes narrowed slightly. "I am not asking you if you can or can't be ready, I'm telling you that you are going to be. Now, follow me."

The short man turned around rigidly and started walking away, leaving many dumbfounded soldiers around.

The kunoichi offered Eld a small smile. "Hi, I am Sakura Ackerman and like you I just got into this business."

"At least there's a familiar face in here. What do we do?"

Levi turned around and gave them an expectant look when he saw they were lagging behind. It was amusing that just one stare could answer their earlier question, because the only thing that they could do at the moment was to follow him.

* * *

><p>"Oluo, can you walk?"<p>

"Oh, shaddup and drink!"

In the end, Sakura ended training exclusively with Eld. Jung and Liesel didn't show up after her outburst, and although Levi seemed like the type of man who did not tolerate any form of disobedience, he proved to not be heartless by not punishing them.

They finished earlier than usual and Sakura managed to join her friends for dinner. Since it was Saturday and they had Sunday off, Petra convinced them to go out to the town and to a bar. Normally she would steer away from alcohol, but her day had been so spectacularly depressing that she had been the first one on board to the whole idea.

"Hey, Sakura! Watch this!"

"Amina, please don't do that… You'll hurt yourself."

She had expected to be one of the first ones to get drunk because of her weight, but in a stunning display of irony she was the only one who remained sober after around two hours of rounds. She had a sneaking suspicion that her chakra broke down the chemicals before they even reached her brain, but she was honestly grasping at straws for an explanation.

That didn't change the fact that she was the designated babysitter for her group. Responsibility was usually stressful, but in this case it was that and incredibly boring; there was nothing duller than watching friends having fun while sitting in the sidelines, making sure they didn't do something incredibly idiotic.

"Did you know that I had sex with Jett?"

"What?! Him? That bastard! I'll––"

"No, Petra, you did not have sex with Jett; you wish you did. And Oluo, stop throwing a tantrum; you're already embarrassing enough as it is."

The blond man pouted and downed his ale, slamming the cup roughly on a stranger's table. This bar, Leaping Horse, was renowned for its rowdiness and its inclusion of a dancing area where the incredibly drunk ones went to show their moves. Five minutes ago they had been sitting comfortably in a table, drinking and laughing, but Amina –– smart little thing that she was –– decided that she wanted to dance and no one would stop her. Petra had followed faster than a dog chased a slab of meat and Oluo had gone after them like a puppy seeking a treat.

And indeed, they spectacularly failed at dancing but they didn't give two shits about it because they were having fun.

Unlike Sakura.

She didn't even want to think about how she was going to get them back to headquarters with the horrible cold outside. Damn her for thinking drinking during winter was a good idea. She might need a good meditation session after this night.

"So you are another victim of the babysitter job?"

Sakura had felt a presence get closer to her, but she never realized he would willingly seek her out. People told her she had an intimidating aura that others actively avoided. He was either dense or apathetic, maybe a combination of both.

She turned to tell the guy to leave her alone, but whatever harsh words she had in mind died the moment she looked up at him. He must have noticed her sudden speechlessness because a mischievous light entered his light blue eyes. Sakura's eyes narrowed at his amusement and she huffed, "Someone has to do it."

The man chuckled. "You even have the tone most people use as well."

"Is there something you want?"

"I wanted to make conversation but I've had easier endeavors with walls."

"It's a bit disconcerting that you even tried to talk to walls."

"My home gets a bit lonely at times."

Sakura had already profiled the man to be of high social standing, or at least acquainted with it. His wavy black hair looked soft and healthy, no lines or scars marred his handsome face, and his clothes, though they appeared normal, showed no indication of wear or tear, a clear sign that they were new in a time when no new clothes were made.

"That's quite unfortunate to hear, but I'll admit that sounds much better than this."

He grinned, showing a perfect set of straight, pearly teeth; yep, pampered. "No pity for me?"

"I'm hogging all the pity for myself at the moment."

The man chuckled,the sound deep and warm, and Sakura felt something spreading in her chest. He tipped his head slightly in greeting. "My name is Sebastian. Pleased to meet you."

Even though the circumstances of their contact were a bit strange, Sakura knew she couldn't refuse to introduce herself without coming off as unnecessarily rude. "I'm Sakura."

Sebastian arched an eyebrow. "That's not a name I have heard before. Where does it come from?"

"My mom had heritage from the orient, so she gave me a Japanese name."

His brow furrowed in confusion. "Do all orientals have pink hair?"

Sakura smiled at his generalization; she usually received questions like that, no matter the age or social class. "I don't know… Maybe? I never asked my mother where my hair came from."

"I think it suits you quite well, Sakura."

Usually that tenor and warmth would disarm the average girl, but the kunoichi was increasingly wary of it; someone who knew how to use that tone of voice was someone who knew how to manipulate people. He reminded her slightly of Amina, and she was unsure if it was a good thing at the moment.

She breathed in deeply and said curtly, "Thank you. Now, if you would excuse me, I need to get these idiots back home."

Sebastian appeared taken aback by her sudden rudeness, but he chose not to let it affect him too much, opting for a sincere smile. "If you need my help, I am willing to offer it; I know it may snow tonight."

"Thank you, but I think I can handle them just fine."

Sakura almost immersed herself in the crowd when he called again, "Wait! Are you… Are you going to come back here?"

She hadn't exactly predicted Sebastian to be _that_ interested, but she would be lying if she said she was not attracted to his physical appearance as well. Nothing serious would come out of it, anyway.

"Yeah, I'll come back."

"When?"

"Every other Saturday. See you, Sebastian."

"Till we meet again."

Shoving drunk people out of her way was one of the easiest tasks of her life, but finding her three friends proved to be a little more difficult. Petra was dancing with Oluo, Oluo was making a fool out of himself, and Amina was enjoying the show with loud guffaws.

She considered the idea of knocking them out and carrying them back to the headquarters, but that would just gather unnecessary attention. So, after another round of pushing people out of the way and pulling her friends along until they were out.

Once the chilly air hit them, the four of them shivered and whined about the cold, surprising Sakura with their new levels of obnoxiousness; just when she thought they had reached their all time high, they surpassed her expectations with flying colors. If anything, they owed her a nice massage, a big portion of meat, and 3DMG maintenance for at least a week.

"Who… Whooo was that hunk that you wanted to jump?"

"Amina, you're drunk."

"You're not denying it," she replied in a singsong.

"Oooh Sakura wants to have sex?"

"She does!"

"Can we please not talk about this," Sakura asked with a groan.

Oluo pitched in, "You three forget that I'm here and I don't want to listen to this."

Petra gave him a dumb smile and patted his back. "It's not that we forgot, dear… We just don't care."

"Why are you so cruel?"

Luckily for her, they left the topic alone and moved on to bashing on Oluo. She wasn't ready to deal with the probing of her drunk friends, especially since they had started that curiosity stage in their lives. And that was fine, because Sakura was curious too, but it was not a topic of conversation for the night.

With sheer determination and a whole lot of good fortune, Sakura reached the headquarters and dropped off her three friends in their rooms. The idea of meditating had been thrown out the window the minute she reached her room. She took off her long coat, shirt, and skirt, quickly put on her night gown, and jumped under the covers of her bed.

Though she was incredibly tired, she couldn't go to sleep with the cold, so she laid there, waiting for her the blankets to trap enough heat to warm her.

It was then that she started hearing noises. Groans and moans and yelps from Liesel's room started seeping through the thin walls. She heard both Liesel and Jung's name in the midst of those screams, and with that Sakura became convinced that she wouldn't be able to look at them without blushing.

The worst part of it all was that she could not deny being a little–– okay, really turned on. Though having roommates was nice and all, it made it extremely hard to relieve some of her sexual urges without being noticed. She couldn't remember the last time she had touched herself, and she missed it, especially with the _sounds _next door.

Sakura got her hand out of the covers and moved her fingers experimentally, eyeing them with a mixture of disgust and acceptance. "Looks like it's just you and me tonight, old friends."

* * *

><p><em>"Shisou, I have a question for you."<em>

_The blonde Hokage looked at her pupil with something akin to interest. "What is it, Sakura?"_

_Her green eyes wavered for a minute, doubt and apprehension crossing her face for a few seconds before her mind steeled herself. "Jiraiya-sama taught Naruto the Rasengan before leaving. Kakashi-sensei taught..." Here her voice trailed off, as if whatever she was about to say next was painful. "Kakashi-sensei taught _him _the Chidori. But I... Well, I..."__  
><em>

_In the past year of having Sakura as a pupil, Tsunade had noticed how she would sometimes hesitate in asking for more than what she was already given. Whether it be because she thought she didn't deserve this mentorship or because she was afraid of her, Tsunade wasn't sure, but she suspected the former; she had never sought to purposely intimidate her, and the fourteen-year-old girl was smart enough to see that._

_"You want a technique of your own." _

_Sakura stiffened and nodded slowly, her head looking down to the patch newly-born grass. They had killed almost all of the grass in this training field from their practices, though most of the damage came from Tsunade's natural punches. "Yes," she whispered._

_"And why do you think you deserve this opportunity?" She was going to teach her the technique anyway, but she needed to instill some determination and self-confidence in this girl that reminded her so much of herself. Even their positions were similar, and the situation was so ironic it almost hurt seeing history repeat itself without having a say in it. However, if she wanted to change anything, Sakura needed to be stronger, and not exactly in the sense that she could break rocks with mere fists._

_"Kushina-san mentioned something about my chakra control and reserves being good enough to––"_

_"I don't care what Kushina said. I'm asking _you _why do _you _think you're ready to learn an advanced level technique."_

_For a moment Tsunade thought that Sakura would back down at the authority in her voice, and she felt a twinge of disapproval and disappointment growing in her chest. Maybe her first impression of her when she had demanded to be taught for the purpose of "not being left behind" was wrong, or maybe she had expected too much from a kunoichi who had been undervalued her whole life. Either way, one thing was sure: Tsunade was wasting her time._

_Whatever hesitance which had been visible on her face disappeared almost instantly; Tsunade resisted the urge to raise an eyebrow at that. Sakura looked at her with determined eyes and a firm mouth. "I am ready, and I cannot afford to lose more time. I came to you so that I wouldn't have to stare at other people's backs, and I can't do that unless I have something that makes me strong."_

_Tsunade smirked and huffed. "I can see you've spent your fair share of time with the Uzumaki," she replied with a chuckle. "Good, good, tenacity is something us ninja need to always have in this world. It's okay to ask for more, Sakura; you're my pupil and you know your limits as well. Tell me, how often have you been summoned to Shikkotsu Forest and trained with them?"_

_"Five times."_

_The Godaime blinked, surprised. Sakura had just signed the contract three months ago, meaning that she either had a good affinity with the slugs or her determination was admirable... Maybe even both. "Then we're ready to begin training. If you had to pick the most important spot in your body, where would it be?"_

_She cocked her head to the side. "I'm sorry, I don't follow."_

_"You're right, I'm being vague." She pointed at the diamond in the middle of her forehead. "I chose my forehead for the because it allows easy access to the brain and, as a result, command to the nervous system in the body. However, it always takes a bit longer for it to reach the extremities. If you had to pick one place to have the Strength of a Hundred Seal, where would it be?"_

_Sakura pointed at a spot in the middle of her chest. "It is close to the central organs of the circulatory and the respiratory systems, not that far from extremities, and relatively close to the spinal cord and brain."_

_"Good, good, that's a place I considered as well in my youth."_

_"Why didn't you choose it?"_

_"Pride gets even the best of us. What is the point of having the Strength of a Hundred Seal, the pinnacle of chakra control, if I cannot show it to the world?" She smiled self-deprecatingly. "Anyhow, I need you to start storing chakra in the point of your choosing. Ingrain that command to the deepest depths of your mind to the point you store chakra in your sleep, meanwhile you're eating, while you're in a coma... I want your subconscious to keep storing chakra, even if you forget what chakra is. The most potent form of Strength of a Hundred Seal takes ten years of stored chakra, but in the next three months I will teach you how to release the seal and what it does."_

_"And just what can it do?"_

_"Grant immortality, in a way."_

* * *

><p><strong>Warning: Long AN ahead**

**Byakugo no In: Strength of a Hundred Seal. As you may have noticed, I tweaked some things with this. The first is that the seal will be located in the chest area (still undecided) for the simple reason that it'd be really weird if a purple rhombus suddenly appeared on her forehead out of ****nowhere. And I changed time from three years to ten. Why? Because I honestly forgot about the seal since she really hasn't used it, but there is no way Tsunade didn't teach Sakura the seal even in this AU. And honestly I feel that there is no way three years of stored energy will be on the same level as Tsunade's seal. If there's a huge issue with any of these small changes, maaybee fanfiction is not the best thing for you.**

**Nope, I will not pair Sakura with an OC, I promise, even if I personally end up adoring their chemistry and whatnot. That doesn't mean Sebastian is not important... ****because he is, but he is not the pairing I have planned for Sakura in the future. I have fully finalized my decision for LeviSaku after listening to most reviewers as well as assessing my own ability to write them both in a romantic situation and I've come to the conclusion that I can and I will. The reason why LeviSaku is not in the description is because I don't want to deceive any new readers into thinking that the focus of this story is romance, because it is not. There is so much more than that, as you've noticed. Also, Levi and Sakura are so incompatible right now that it's too funny to even consider a romantic relationship at the moment; it will happen, though, just not any time soon.**

**Also, here is a timeline of the entirety of what has been revealed in The Vessel for the curious/confused. What is going on/has happened in the Naruto-verse will remain a mystery for longer. But l****et's just say that just as the water in a river rushes or slows depending on the size of the channel, time flows at different rates in different places. In other words, time is relative in the Snk and Naruto worlds.**

_March 2, 842: Sakura wakes up in the SnK world with no memories except her name and identity. She is unknowingly nursed back to health by Doctor Jaeger (revealed in Chapter 2) and stays with Helsa for the next six months, receiving lessons of German from Mikoto Ackerman. She is 16 going on 17 in the next four weeks (unknown to her)._

_October 8, 842: Helsa is murdered by bandits and their home is lit on fire. The Ackermans take Sakura in._

_June 20, 843: Sakura is registered as a citizen. Her age is listed as 17, but she is really 18 by now (A gap of 1 year and 2 months has been created with this)._

_April 4, 844: The Mikoto and Erick Ackerman are murdered by sex slavers and the Jaegers take in Mikasa and Sakura. Around this time Levi, Farlan, and Isabel join the Survey Corps (the rest is unknown at the moment because the spin-off manga is still ongoing, but I will see how I can accommodate this)._

_Early summer of 845: Shiganshina is attacked. Kalura dies, the Trio is sent to work on the fields, Sakura enlists to escape the Reclamation draft. _

_Early summer of 847: The Trio enlists after working on the fields for two years._

_May of 848: Sakura, Petra, Oluo, and Amina join the Survey Corps._

_June of 848: The Survey Corps embarks on their 28th Expedition. Sakura is identified as a sensor._

_July of 848: The Survey Corps embarks on their 29th Expedition with Sakura in Commander Erwin's Team._

_November of 848: The Survey Corps returns from their 34th Expedition, a marked failure. Sakura transfers from Commander Erwin's Team to the Special Operations Squad after the loss of two of its members. Eld Jinn joins a day later._

**Finally, a shout out to chaosrin, catxangel, AmeRaSora, The Benevolent Scriber, Arisu-kun, Basia Orci, FairiesDescent, The Wolf Of Shadows, Alumi, mun3litKnight, flevantein, cj1of4, brokenmaelstrom, Yuyui, Guest, cherryblossom1423, Riyokia, FreakyPants, Rose Rain 7, Sky65, Freddie4153, greymouser, Guest, and deedee2034 for being so awesome and leaving a review. Your comments make me happy and the writing process a pleasure. Also, thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Reviews are sugar.**

**Penpal**


	9. Baggage

A few days before the 35th expedition, the southern part of Rose received one of the worst early snows in its history, forcing Commander Smith to postpone the expedition to a later date. Though this meant that they wouldn't have to worry about going outside the walls, it did not excuse anyone from missing training.

Staying warm in the winter was one of the hardest things to do. The problem first arose in the first winter of their Training Corps days, when Sakura realized that the 3DMG and winter clothes didn't exactly go well together. At first she thought they would be excused from the harsh conditions, but their instructors kept pushing them on, even in sub-zero temperatures. They dressed a bit more warmly, yes, and they did wear gloves and scarves, but it wasn't nearly as protective as what civilians would wear in these times.

Levi had pushed the starting time of their training to twelve, when the sun was at its highest and not as cold as in the mornings. They skipped the usual morning spars and jumped straight into the titan course after their warmup. The trees lacked leaves by now, leaving barren branches and unhealthy trunks. The cold wind was harsh and biting, but they had to hold in their shivers because that would upset their balance.

Sakura spotted a titan before her peers and sped towards it by releasing more gas. This proved to be a bad idea, because the quicker she moved in the air, the more wind hit her body. She unwittingly shivered, causing her to lose some of her balance and get in the way of her teammate, Liesel. The blonde shot her a nasty green glare, one that Sakura returned because what she had done wasn't nearly as bad as she was making it out to be. Still, it hurt to be in the receiving end of that expression, since Liesel was supposed to be her teammate, her friend, someone she could trust her back with; so far, the blonde had only given her a cold shoulder.

The titan course of the Special Operations Squad was a bit different than the ones the Survey Corps used. Even though by themselves they were considered the among the most talented, their biggest strength relied on their teamwork; individually they could perhaps fell two titans, but together they could take on a horde without growing too tired or wasting too much gas. The wooden titans had foam in certain key points of their bodies, like the back of the knees or heels or the arms, typical places a soldier might slash if he knew someone else would take the kill.

Since she was the first one to get to the titan, she aimed one hook at the foam part in the bottom calf and slashed both of the heels. Theoretically speaking this would incapacitate the titan and bring it to its knees or completely to the ground, meaning that her job was done. Sakura sent another grappling hook to a trunk, retracting the wire once she landed on a thick branch.

She thought something was wrong but it was until it was too late that she realized there was a problem. Liesel, having lost control of herself, crashed against Sakura. The momentum behind her speed threw them both against the tree trunk, Sakura's shoulder receiving the full brunt of the assault, and even then she still hit the side of her head against the wood as well.

The blow left her slightly dizzy, but she retained enough balance to remain on the thick tree branch. Her hand instinctively clutched her wounded shoulder ––she feared dislocation–– and moaned in agony. Through her haze of discomfort she managed to glare at a blonde person standing in front of her. "What was that for!"

"Don't act as if I planned this. It's your fault for making me lose my balance out there."

She grit her teeth in a mixture of frustration and pain. "You could've righted yourself immediately!"

Levi landed between them and shut them both up with a glare. "That's enough; don't make me regret keeping you in this squad. Jung, take Sakura to the infirmary; Liesel, come with me… And Eld, finish training by yourself."

The blonde managed to still glare at her, even with their very unamused superior standing less than five feet between them. Sakura felt her blood boil at the treatment she was getting for no good reason but decided to keep her mouth shut; she didn't want to get on Levi's bad side, especially since his temper was legendary.

"Do you need any help?" Jung asked her kindly.

Sakura frowned slightly and shook her head, but Liesel's scowl did not relent. Internally, she just wanted to faint at the moment from how much the world was spinning, but she knew better than to make unnecessary body contact with the someone else's man; that was a line she wasn't willing to cross, even if Liesel was acting like a bitch.

Jung must've thought her proud, because he looked at her with something akin to disappointment. Still, Sakura managed to use her 3DMG back to the headquarters, albeit at a tediously slow speed. By the time they were back the world had cleared a little and she was able to see straight. The thump in her shoulder was escalating; what had been a simple pulsing had now become violent drumming and she had to thank her high pain tolerance, because otherwise she would be reduced to tears on the ground right there.

"I'm sorry about her," he said quietly, interrupting her miserable thoughts. The walk to the infirmary, which was in the middle of the headquarters, had been suffocatingly silent until then. "Hugh Lange was my best friend and Franz Sommer… Well, that was Liesel's brother."

The kunoichi let out a surprised sigh. "That explains her anger. Don't tell me she thinks I'm replacing her brother."

"It certainly doesn't help that you and Eld joined not even two days after his death. She just needs time to mourn him. It has only been three weeks, after all."

"Three weeks of me getting her glares and her snark," she bit back. "Eld doesn't receive that treatment from her."

Jung seemed a bit embarrassed. "I won't claim to know Liesel completely, but I think it also has to do with a territorial issue. Until now she was the only female in the squad."

"She thinks I'm going to _steal_ you?"

He chocked, his cheeks becoming bright pink and his dark eyes staring at her with surprise. "H-How do you know?"

She arched an eyebrow at that comment. Did people think her an idiot or was she maybe a bit too perceptive as a ninja? "It's obvious." That and she had heard them having sex twice by now. "You look at her as if she holds the answers to all your problems."

"Sometimes I think she does."

Sakura rolled her eyes good-naturedly; and women were the over-sentimental ones all the time, right? "There's my confirmation," she mumbled.

Jung chuckled but then sobered immediately, looking at her with pleading eyes. "Please don't tell Captain Levi, though. He doesn't approve of romantic relationships between squad members because he thinks it obscures judgement."

Technically, Levi was right with that assessment. When the time came, a person might make foolish decisions for the sake of protecting her loved one. If solo, the only person affected was she herself, but in a squad that relied on teamwork so much, one of those actions could cost the lives of many more. Still, if she ever hoped to have a healthy relationship with Liesel, it would be important to not ruin her only source of happiness.

"I won't tell him, but in exchange you must try to convince Liesel I'm not some evil bitch who wants to make her life miserable."

They reached the infirmary wing, a small hallway full of different rooms for the wounded and doctors. Some of the Survey Corps members became involved in the health branch, but this was extremely hard since some knowledge of medicine was required to even apply. Still, the offer of staying behind and treating the wounded was very appetizing to those who wanted to do something for humanity but didn't want to face the titans.

Sakura felt a small twinge of disappointment at reaching their destination. She liked Jung Busch, and until that moment she hadn't spent much time conversing with him. Sure, he was usually with his girlfriend and that was understandable, but she was finally coming around the importance of teamwork and now she didn't want to let go of this acquaintance.

She still hadn't had a meaningful conversation with Eld, and after this realization she was sure to change that.

* * *

><p>The doctors ordered her to stay off from any strenuous physical activity for at least a week and gave her a sling to wear for the next two weeks. The impact had been graver than what she previously thought, because not only had she slammed her shoulder against an extremely hard surface, but the momentum Liesel carried made it even worse.<p>

At least there was no concern over her minor head injury, and for that they simply told her to rest. Either way, she had healed her shoulder, but she couldn't randomly make a full recovery for a two-week injury in a day without drawing attention, so she had to wear that stupid sling.

So, here she was, laying on her bed, with nothing to do except stare at the ceiling. She couldn't train because she was commanded not to; her friends were currently training; she didn't go to Trost at the moment because there was no point in going alone when she knew she would brood; Eld and Jung were nowhere to be seen.

"Ugh," she groaned, and to add to her discomfort she couldn't move her body that well because her arm had that freaking sling. Damn Liesel and her anger issues. Sure, Jung might've said that she was in the grieving process, but that didn't just give her a free pass to treat her like shit. Besides, Liesel would never get over the death of her brother. Hell, she still hadn't gotten over Helsa's death and that was six years ago. She was still a bit resentful towards Eren for taking away her revenge; she was still angry that Kalura had died and she hadn't avenged her; she still berated herself for stealing Bertha's spot in the 102nd Trainees Squad. But the difference between her and Liesel was that she looked forward. Thinking that the pain would pass was naive thinking from her and Jung's part. That was why love is a better motivation than hate or revenge, not because it is easier, but because it is the only way to get over the shitty lots they have been dealt with.

Sakura didn't really know what the point of her internal argument, because no one was hearing her except herself, and that was sad. What she needed was company, but who would be able to accompany her right now?

Her eyes snapped open and brightened immediately. She abruptly stood up and left her (somewhat messy) room with excited steps. The Special Operations Squad's wing was completely empty, and the other hallways of the headquarters were devoid of people, but that was okay, because for what she wanted to do, the less people there were the better. She first stopped by the kitchen and stole a bucket filled with six apples, uncaring of whatever punishment she might receive from this; in the end, it was worth it.

The smell of horse shit made her scrunch her nose in disgust, but Sakura still went inside. She made several trips to gather all the grooming supplies, since she could only rely on one arm, but in the end she managed to get everything she needed to spend some quality time with Haruto.

"_Hey there, buddy," _she cooed in Japanese. Speaking in Japanese had started with Shiro, the mare she had rented to visit her three wards, but the feeling of belonging when talking in her native tongue to an animal had been ingrained since then. "_It's been a long time, right? Isn't this weather horrible? I'm here to spoil you today, big boy. You deserve it for being so patient."_

Sakura got out her brush and started gently trailing it up and down, left to right. Haruto's coat was a beautiful golden brown that always kept its shine. "_It makes me so jealous. Not only are you a strong and healthy horse, but you're beautiful too." _She giggled. "_I guess beautiful is not something you want to be, right?"_

A horse to her right whined. The kunoichi pivoted towards it, surprised, because until then no animal had responded to her words. She patted Haruto's side lightly, signaling a small break, and made her way towards Haruto's neighbor. It was a tall horse with the most beautiful black coat she had ever seen before in her life. She cautiously checked the horse's back and discovered, much to her surprise, that this was a beautiful _mare_.

"_I had you confused for a male one for a second there. Sorry about that… Hmm… You're lucky I didn't nickname you Black because I swear I named this other horse White and didn't feel bad about it. But don't worry, you're much, _much_ prettier than she is." _She brushed the mare's coat along with her coos, noting with increasing excitement that she was starting to relax under her touch. _"You're quiet, you know that? Total opposite of Haruto… You're Makimi. Mah-kee-me. Do you like it?"_

As if she had understood her, Makimi snorted. Sakura resisted the urge to giggle and continued grooming her well-kept coat. Whoever the owner of this mare was, he or she kept good care of her, because she was well-fed and looked after. Not only that, but just how it was easy to tell who had seen titans and who hadn't, it was as simple to know which horses had gone on expeditions and which ones stayed behind, and Makimi was a veteran.

Haruto snorted loudly, drawing her attention back to his stall. He was bobbing his head up and down, as if beckoning her forward, and, with an apologetic look aimed at Makimi, she left her stall. She started patting his head, berating him in her native tongue for being so jealous, but he ignored her ministrations and instead pointedly looked at the bucket with apples. She scoffed but with a secret smile she took an apple and gave it to him.

Makimi then snorted and started repeating Haruto's actions, obviously wanting some apples as well. Sakura gave a delighted laugh and started sharing Haruto's apples with her until they had been evenly split. "_You two are so spoiled. If someone saw––" _She sensed a chakra close-by and clamped down, hesitant of letting anyone hearing her speaking Japanese. Sure, they knew she wasn't entirely native because of her name and appearance, but she still didn't want any unwanted attention.

Much to her relief, it was only Eld. Even if it was extremely cold, he was sweating and puffing a little fog. He had put on their uniform gray coat, which must've been a relief for him because it sure had been for her. "Sakura?"

"Hey, Eld. You finished your training?"

A dark look momentarily passed through his face, but then he smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, I'm done. Do you think those on kitchen duty are still serving lunch?"

Oh, in all her enthusiasm in finding something to do, she had completely forgotten about lunch. Now that she had acknowledged her hunger, her stomach rumbled, as if scolding her for not giving it food. "I don't feel like eating Survey Corps food today. Want to go to Trost and find something to eat? My treat."

"That actually sounds like an excellent idea. Want to go right now?"

Eld helped her put back all the grooming supplies back to where they where, because if there was something that the Survey Corps was very strict about, it was definitely the care for stable and horses. The veterinarians took meticulous care for all of them and each member was responsible for their own horse. These animals were not only their means of transport, but it had always saved them when they were in a pinch.

The journey to Trost was very lively. Eld came from a small family of bakers and had left home when he was eighteen to enlist in the military because he didn't want to make bread for a living. He had been ranked forty-second in the 101st Trainees Squad, a year ahead of Sakura, and he had been promoted to Team Leader in one of Nanaba's teams around five months ago. He had chosen the Survey Corps because he always wanted to be the prominent hero of his own story and wanted to die a glorious death, but his dreams of dying after saying something profound had faded after his second expedition.

"She was eaten, just like that," he recounted with a disturbed glimmer in his eyes. "Her head landed in the ground and that was the end of it. Just like that my best friend died, with no fanfare or last words. Ever since then… Well, it's just wishful thinking to have a nice death outside the walls."

He wasn't exactly sure why Levi had chosen him to be on his squad, since he personally didn't have a long list of kills, but was nevertheless happy to be the direct subordinate of a man he heavily admired. In fact, he stated he didn't know single person who did not feel some sort of positive feeling towards the short Captain, and it was a great honor serving under him.

Sakura, in return, offered to also give him a small recount of her life so far. She left out the obvious confusing parts, like waking up in a forest with no memory of the last sixteen years of her life or possessing chakra, but other than that she was truthful. She was born to a family of farmers, and her mother was one of the last from an Oriental clan, explaining her first name, meanwhile her father was German, explaining her last name. Eld was the first person she told in the Survey Corps about the demise of her family and her subsequent adoption to the Jaeger family, and that admission made her feel slightly guilty; here she was, telling someone she had just met a month ago about the horrible end of her family when she hadn't even told Petra that she had been adopted. It was weird, but she felt much better telling a person who didn't really know her about her past than it was telling her best friends about it. She could've told Petra early on, and there were times she almost did, but the opportunity slipped and by now she wouldn't be able to bear the _pity _in her eyes.

Still, she was determined to change that.

Eld proved to be a good listener and offered his condolences for both her family and what happened in Shiganshina. But instead of pitying her, he simply stated that just made her that much more admirable, because she had still chosen to join the Survey Corps when she was fully aware of what she was getting herself into.

She didn't even know how to form the words of her gratitude, because Eld thought her admirable and she hadn't even told her the full story.

When they finally found a restaurant to eat in, the air around them was lighter and Sakura could feel the camaraderie blossoming between them. Eld was someone she would (hopefully) spend a lot of time with and it was good that they started with a good relationship. Their lunch was much lighter than their earlier conversation, so much more jovial that Sakura teased Eld when she saw him eyeing their waitress.

"Like what you see?"

Eld blushed violently and sputtered, "N-N-No! What makes you think that? Besides… It's nothing."

Sakura smirked and called the waitress. The blonde woman grinned brilliantly and headed towards them, and in that moment the kunochi became much more convinced. "Hello, what's your name?"

"Rosalind, ma'am."

Her smile became more honest and she pointed at Eld. "Well, Rosalind, my friend here thinks you're just as beautiful as your name and would like to get to know you better by taking you out on a date."

Now Eld turned as red as a tomato and he stared dumbly at both women. Rosalind giggled, her blue eyes full of mirth. "Is this true?"

"Uh… Um… Maybe–– I mean yes! I mean…"

Sakura massaged her temple, a bit embarrassed at the total lack of charm Eld was displaying. If he continued like that, he would make it seem as if both of them were idiots! Fortunately, Rosalind took pity on him and gently cut him off, "It's okay, sir, I have always had something for soldiers."

Seeing the excited look in Eld's eyes made her feel extremely happy and proud of herself. Sakura paid for their meal and convinced Rosalind's boss to give her a little time off, which he unsurprisingly agreed to after paying him the money he would've earned having the waitress on duty.

The walk back from Trost was quiet and longer than the journey to Trost. The sun was setting, painting darkening sky with orange and red, and the stars were twinkling slightly. The temperature dropped considerably with the beginning of dusk, causing her injured arm to feel more uncomfortable, but inside she felt warm.

Her feet took her to her old room, the one she shared with Petra and Amina and her mostly-absent roommate Rita. She barged in, catching Petra changing from her long-sleeved shirt to her night clothes and cutting Amina from whatever sentence she was about to finish.

Petra covered her wrapped chest immediately and blushed. "Sakura!"

"W-What happened to you?" Amina yelped, eyeing her sling.

She slammed the door shut and blurted out, "I killed four men six years ago." Their shocked expression matched the one she wore as well. Out of all the things she wanted to say, why had she chosen that one, the one she secret she had promised herself to carry to the grave? "They killed my grandmother, so I hunted them down and killed them with my bare hands," she continued in a whisper.

Amina slowly got up from her lower bed and tramped towards Sakura. "What?"

"I don't feel guilty. In fact, I don't feel anything about it, and it scares me so much. Am I a monster? Not because I killed them, but because I have no remorse?"

Her dark-haired friend put a comforting hand on her "good" shoulder and squeezed tightly. Petra finished putting on her nightgown and also headed towards her, showing the same amount of compassion by taking her hand. "I'm shocked, I won't lie," Petra began with a nervous chuckle. "I… Well, I don't think you're a monster. I won't say I would've done the same thing, but I understand why you did it…"

"Do you think about this a lot?" Amina asked gently.

Quite frankly, this was the first time she mused about it since the dinner when the Ackermans took her in. Since then she had never spared those despicable men a second thought, choosing to bury their actions (and hers) in the deepest corners of her mind. But obviously it still bothered her, or otherwise she wouldn't have confessed murdering four people to her two best friends.

"No, I don't… I don't even know why I told you two. It doesn't bother me. I'm okay."

Petra let go of her hand and shot her an expectant stare, not buying her sentence at all. "Really? Seriously? Sakura, I–– _we _know you're skittish about your past, but you need to stop doing this to yourself."

"Every time we think we got in, you just shut us out," Amina continued, her voice stronger and harsher than Petra's. "You asked me that other time about my past and I told you, even though I was afraid you would criticize me. You can't just take and never give, Sakura."

Sakura started stepping back from her friends until her spine was against the door of their room. When she had thought about divulging parts of her past to her friends, she had never considered this event, the scenario where they would demand to know more instead of wishing to have known less. Nobody in the world fully knew who she was, not even Sakura herself. How could she tell them everything and hope for their acceptance if she wasn't fully sure she accepted herself?

"You would hate me if I gave… What I have to give isn't pretty," she muttered, her eyes downcast.

She saw footsteps approaching her as if she were approaching a scared animal, hoping it wouldn't flee. In a way, Sakura was very close to running away. She cupped her face in both of her hands and forced Sakura to look up her warm amber eyes. "We all have inner demons… Some of ours are bigger than others, but we all have something we are afraid of inside of us."

She felt tears pooling in the bottom of her eyes, but she willed them not to fall. "So you don't hate me?"

Petra gave her a small smile and shook her head slowly. "I love you, nothing can change that. Right, Amina?"

The girl looked away, a flustered expression on her face, and she mumbled, "Yeah, I love you too."

Sakura laughed, tears finally trailing down her cheeks, and she awkwardly hugged Petra with her "uninjured" arm, much to her delight. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you…"

Amina abruptly ended their tender moment, claiming they were displaying too many emotions for her cold heart to handle. Instead, they opted to all sit down in the Petra's top bunk bed and catch Sakura up in around a month's worth of information and gossip. Apparently, Oluo had been recognized for his skills and would soon become a Team Leader if the next two expeditions went without a hitch. Petra was also considered a candidate, but she was still a bit hesitant of accepting such a position when she had less than six months of experience. Amina had taken a different route and had begun working with Hange and her band of titan-aficionados with the hopes of learning more about them.

"I don't understand where this interest came from," she confessed. "It's not like I like them, because I hate them… But there must be something that we have been missing, right? I want to find that something."

The kunoichi vented her frustrations with her new squad, citing Liesel Sommer as the source of all of the problems and her injury. Though the two girls were sympathetic for her loss, they still did what every good best friend did and sided with Sakura on the issue, blaming her for the dissonance in the Squad Levi's teamwork.

"I mean, she doesn't have to take it out on me, right? I'm sure there are other outlets."

"You exploded like that on me when I told you I was going to die next to you."

Sakura glared at her, remembering the event with perfect clarity. "Yeah, that's a _fantastic _thing to tell your best friend, right?" She hadn't appreciated her comment, at all, because having a defeatist nature made challenges much harder to overcome.

Amina scowled back. "Yeah, well, what I'm trying to say with that example is that people deal with grief in different ways and you're acting like a bit of a hypocrite."

"What!"

"Well, look at just what happened! You bottle everything up and then explode at the most random moments. Not that I have a problem with that ––in fact, I'm glad you finally let that out because you can get sick from these types of things–– but what I'm trying to say is that you can't force your style on everyone or think that it's better than other people's."

Sakura's mouth tightened in a firm line and she looked at Petra expectantly, asking her for her opinion. Petra smiled sheepishly at both of them, uncomfortable to be put in such a tedious spot where there was no wrong or right answer. "I kinda agree with Amina on this, but there are better ways to phrase things, Amina."

The kunoichi huffed and crossed her arms, a pitiful pout forming on her face. "I'm not a hypocrite," she grouched.

Amina guffawed and patted Sakura's good shoulder. "We're all hypocrites here, don't worry. World's full of them and we wouldn't exist without them. I mean, my family and a bunch of others make a living out of being hypocrites, but up there we call it diplomacy." She scoffed. "Same bullshit."

"You're oddly critical of your family, considering they raised you," Petra observed with a knowing smile.

"Hey, I never said I was any different."

They descended into a comfortable silence, the one no one wanted to break because everything they wanted to say was already said and everything they wanted to imply was already inferred. She wasn't exactly sure what she had done to deserve such great friends, but she was glad that life was fair and sprinkled misery with these moments of happiness in between them.

"Hm, I better leave. The Captain is uptight about curfew."

The girls nodded in agreement, certain of her statement after hearing countless stories of his love of discipline and order as well as the punishments he handed down. They helped her down, careful to not add further pain to her shoulder, and, after one last meaningful glance, sent Sakura on her way.

She should've known that the day had been going on far too well when she saw Levi standing in the front of her room, the darkness hiding his expression but her perceptive eyes noticing his unamused countenance. She observed the night sky and frowned; it can't be nine already, can it?

"Captain," she greeted once she was close, foregoing the usual salute due to her incapability to perform it.

"Cadet," he replied stiffly. Sakura narrowed her eyes at him, displeased at being referred so lowly when she was in one of the most prestigious and dangerous teams in the Survey Corps. "Mind telling me why your room is in such a state?"

She peeked inside her room and frowned, noticing that it was not nearly as bad as she thought it was. Sure, there were some clothes sprawled on the floor (was that her underwear?) and her bed was unmade because she had left the room in such a hurry, but compared to earlier messes Petra had cleaned, this was _nothing_. "I don't see what the problem is, sir."

Levi shook his head, disgruntled, and ordered her to come inside. He wiped his index finger across her desktop and showed it to her. "Look at all this filth. When was the last time you dusted your room?"

"I was supposed to do that?" She thought that having a clean room consisted of having everything in place… Was this the kind of useless shit Petra did?

"Yes, _Cadet_, that was what I meant by _cleaning_, or are you stupid too?"

"Why didn't you say anything the last four room checks if it bothered you that much?"

"Are you talking back to a superior?"

"No, I'm asking a very reasonable question."

"Tch." He glowered at her, and she was about to return the heated gaze when she noticed there was something off about her Captain. Now that she could stare at him continuously for more than three minutes, she was able to notice things, like that pasty complexion or the dark bags under his eyes. "What are you staring at?"

He obviously would deny any concerns she–– no, not concerns, because she was not worried about him. He would obviously deny any _observations _she brought up because he was simply a proud man who cared not what his underlings thought about him and he would instead pursue the earlier topic about the state of the room. She needed a distraction, and she needed it fast.

_"The deaths of my teammates will be on your shoulders."_

_"_Do you blame me for Franz and Hugh's deaths like Liesel does?" That Liesel blamed her for her brother's demise was a lie (she hoped), but it certainly helped that they had bad chemistry to begin with and it was not an unreasonable conclusion for her to reach. Still, even if what Levi thought of her didn't affect her, she was honestly curious as to what he thought.

His gray eyes widened a bit, foregoing the usual deadpan look. "What?"

"When I decided to join Commander Erwin's team, you told me that the deaths of my teammates would rest on my shoulders. Well, do you think so?"

"You still remember that?"

Huh, so he's avoiding the topic. Interesting. "Considering that it's one of the first things you told me… Yeah."

Levi's appearance went from annoyed to somber, proving a success on her attempt to distract him. But now she wanted to know his answer, because for some reason she wanted to know what her superior thought of her, as much as she hated to admit it. "I don't think having you there would've changed much."

"Is that a no?"

He grunted. "You're pushy about this."

"You're dodgy about this."

"Watch it, my patience with you won't last forever. Just because you're injured doesn't mean I can't punish you."

"I need to hear it, Captain."

"…No, I don't find you responsible for their deaths… _You_ didn't kill them." Something remained unsaid, something Levi omitted was important, but Sakura had pushed him enough and she was not that interested in finding out what he left out. "Don't think I forgot about the room," he suddenly said, and her telltale blush proved everything and more. "But considering the time and your injury… I want this room spotless for next week."

"Yessir."

"And Cadet… I may have been lenient with the back talk today, but don't expect me to be so next time. I believe in discipline, and the best type of discipline is pain."

She had to hold back her smirk, because there's no way this man would ever break her, but she indulged him by acting nervous and bobbing her head up and down, whispering, "Yes, Captain."

Without a second glance the black-haired man left, leaving Sakura feeling oddly tired and ready to sleep.

* * *

><p>At first Sakura thought it was a mistake agreeing to meet Sebastian, a man she barely knew and she wasn't exactly sure if she wanted to know more about. Well, that last bit was a lie, because she wouldn't have said yes to his proposal had she not been a bit attracted to him, right? She still talked about it with Amina, and surprisingly she admitted she knew nothing about this Sebastian, but claimed that his intentions were not malicious; she did not deny any mischief on his part, however, so Sakura was a bit on the edge.<p>

Strange fears of rejection crawled in her skin when she opened the door to the Leaping Horse, the inn they had decided to meet in. Unsurprisingly, the bar was rowdy and jovial, just like the last time she had seen it. At least this time she wasn't acting like a babysitter.

She quickly spotted the black-haired man, who was currently the center of all the noise. He was singing a traveling song, his tenor sweet but at the same time masculine, and both men and women were repeating the lines with increased fervor.

He spotted her a few minutes after her entrance and grinned at her, beckoning her forwards. She shivered slightly and shook her head, not wanting to become the center of attention. In fact, much to her displeasure, Sakura was garnering quite a bit of attention, no doubt because of her exotic looks.

Sebastian finished his song in a high note and pushed his way through the cheering crowd towards her. She would be lying if she said his enthusiasm wasn't contagious. His eyes widened in concern when he saw her sling. "Are you fine?"

"Yeah, don't worry about this."

He chuckled nervously. "For a second there I thought you were lying to me and had planned to leave me."

"You think so little of me."

"Well, you didn't give me much to go by, right?"

Sakura winced, remembering their last encounter. She had acted a bit coldly and snobbishly towards him, so he definitely was right in pointing that out. "Yeah… Sorry about that. I was––"

He chuckled warmly and interrupted gently, "Yes, your friends were quite inebriated, I remember. But, you must be hungry, correct?"

Sakura hugged her nondescript warm jacket closer to her body and nodded. She had chosen to keep her identity as a soldier hidden for a while longer. She wasn't sure what his reaction would be when he discovered she might die every month, and she didn't feel like scaring him off so soon in their acquaintance. Huh, so maybe she _was _more interested than what she had previously let herself believe.

Sebastian led her farther from all the ruckus to one of the emptier sides of the inn, making the mood more intimate but at the same time not too closed off from the rest of the inn.

A waitress came back and got their order, telling them that their stew would be out in around twenty minutes. Her departure left her in an uncomfortable position, because as handsome as Sebastian was, she didn't know exactly what to talk about with him.

Luckily, he was much smoother in the conversation department. "So, Sakura, do you like music?"

Music was a privilege only the rich could afford. Most of the songs she knew came from Mikoto, so they were in Japanese, and the odd German song she knew was severely butchered because it had traveled countless miles and through countless mouths that the lyrics were either completely wrong or missing. The higher classes, on the other hand, were known employ traveling bards and troupes on top of attending orchestras and operas for their entertainment, especially during the harsh winter months when things to do were scarce and far in between.

"I like it, but I can't say I've heard enough."

"Huh, we can't possibly have that. Say, mind waiting for me? It will just be a moment."

"By all means."

The man was barely gone for five minutes and upon his return he carried with him a beautiful musical instrument of the shiniest mahogany wood. He started tuning the instrument and looked up at her with twinkling eyes. "Do you know what this is?"

"Never seen it before in my life."

"This is Sina's instrument, the lute. Well, at least for me she is, since the violin and cello have gained traction inside Wall Sina. Whenever I tell stories with it, it's as if a magical spell has been cast over everyone."

"Stories? You tell stories with it?"

He nodded ecstatically. "Indeed, but they are no normal stories. Want to hear one?"

Yet again his excitement was giddy, because he had her nodding energetically.

Sebastian placed the lute in his lap and started strumming with his right hand, testing the strings. He then started humming along, his voice testing various pitches until he was in harmony with the instrument.

_"To those who trust our goddesses' grace,_

_Let this story serve as grim reminder,_

_That though they may help in a lost case,_

_Their job is not to be your minder._

_Eifah, melodious and sweet,_

_Had great love for his blue-eyed Adalie._

_He planted large fields of wheat_

_And she received him with great glee._

_But the day bites_

_And Adalie descended._

_All the campfire nights_

_With his love had suddenly ended._

_But the love he carried_

_Was so strong_

_That not even the seeds he had buried_

_Could keep him from his song._

_'Oh Graceful Sina!_

_Merciful Rose!_

_Warrior Maria!_

_Please bring Adalie from her repose!'_

_'She is in the darkest pits of the earth,'_

_The Merciful gently responded._

_'Take her without looking for her rebirth_

_Lest she and the dirt will have corresponded.'_

_Eifah traveled to the deepest depths_

_And found his lover weeping._

_At his sight she took in deep breaths_

_And he found himself to the surface leaping._

_But Eifah wanted his first sight_

_To be the blue of his wife and not the sky._

_So at the first sign of light,_

_She disappeared despite his cry."_

Sakura hadn't realized she was crying until Sebastian ended with a high-key, the voice sweet and full of sorrow. It surprised her how in character Sebastian remained throughout his song, going from cheerfully happy to brokenly devastated, a mirror of what the hero Eifah must have felt. The combination of his voice with the melody of his lute just tugged her heartstrings.

A cheer of applause broke her from her musings, and she was a bit disappointed that she couldn't join because of her injury. Still, Sebastian basked in the limelight, grinning proudly and bowing his head in thanks. He signaled the crowd that he was busy, and after expressing their disappointment, the people left.

"Wow, that was… I feel so full."

Sebastian laughed, the sound warm and gentle, and Sakura couldn't help but want to hear it more often. "Music tends to have that effect on everyone, even for me. For a second there even I thought I was Eifah, though I have sung this tune more times than I can count."

"It shows, you handled it masterfully."

"Tell me, do you know any songs?"

She frowned slightly and sighed deeply. "I do, but they're in another language."

Now he was both surprised and intrigued. Songs in different tongues were seldom heard and even more scarcely learned. Only the most well-educated entertainers from the upper circles knew songs from different languages. "Now it's almost guaranteed that I haven't heard it. Mind singing it for me?"

"I'm not a very good singer," she confessed, a bit embarrassed. Mikoto and Mikasa had many laughs at her expense, not that it mattered because those were times she knew she entertained them.

Sebastian smiled gently and shook his head."That's okay, just speak softly and if I know it I'll sing along."

If he knows it? Then Sebastian probably knew songs in foreign languages, betraying the earlier profiling Sakura had done on him; he was one of the higher troubadours then. "Fine, fine, but don't laugh.

_"'Jouzu ni damashite ne uso wa kirai de suki' kimi no kotoba _

_Ima koro ni natte kimochi wa itai hodo dakara bokura sayonara_

_Itsuka mata ne to te wo furiatta kedo mou au koto wa nai no deshou? _

_Saigo no uso wa yasashii uso deshita wasurenai_

_Ano hi mita sora akane iro no sora wo nee itsuka omoidasu deshou _

_Hatasenakatta yakusoku wo daite futari arukidasu."_

The man was quiet for the longest time, staring at her with wide eyes. "What… I had never heard that language before. What is its name?"

"Japanese. My family is one of the last ones that speak it."

"Oh, the shame! I can't believe people haven't heard this, and perhaps will never hear it… Even though I don't know what it means… It sounds very sad. It sounds like a good-bye."

Sakura blinked and jerked back slightly. "Wow, you're good. It actually is about a good-bye. How did you figure it out?"

"Emotion is the universal language of humans. No matter where you are, a laugh expresses happiness, a grimace is pain, a cry can be sadness… Right there, your voice was wistful, and your eyes sad."

Though his assessment was right, the kunoichi had to refrain from pointing out that the reason why she had sounded and appeared that way was because a bout of nostalgia hit her straight in the chest. Mikoto would hum these verses the most out of all the songs she knew. But then again, the song _was _a sad one, so she shouldn't discard his earlier assumption. "You're right, I hadn't seen it that way."

"Can you share the translation with me?"

Sakura sighed, despondent. "I would, but I… I have never really translated this song. It would take a while. But if you're willing to wait and help me out finding the words, I'll help you."

"Excellent! There's nothing more exciting than being the first one to sing new songs. I'll sing your melody in the high courts of Sina."

She smirked, a triumphant look crossing her face. "So you are from the upper classes. I knew it. Who's your patron?"

Sebastian returned her smug look. "Well, you don't expect me to reveal all my secrets in one night, do you? I'll leave it a mystery, just like you have yours. Maybe that way we'll stay around longer."

Though she wasn't unbearably curious to find out who his patron was, she had to admit she enjoyed herself greatly talking about music. It was a luxury not many had, and expressing emotion in such a beautiful way was a great outlet for the profession she had. "I'll stay around and help translate if you promise to sing me more songs."

"It's a promise."

* * *

><p>The third afternoon of the 37th expedition was a chilly one, but compared to the harsher ones during the long winter, this was nothing. The Survey Corps had already secured their new supplies location in an abandoned castle, creating yet another stronghold for humanity. Everyone would be heading back inside Wall Rose after the Squad Levi patrolled ahead later on during the day and found a route devoid of titans, or made a route clear of those monsters.<p>

"Oluo, mind passing me some meat?"

The man grunted and passed her a piece of steak, munching on his own happily. His Team Leader had recognized his talent and spoke of promoting him to become a Team Leader after he took out two titans by himself and saved a teammate in the process. He was extremely proud and satisfied, to say the least.

"You should seriously mind your manners," Petra sniffed.

"You're not my mom," he replied with food in his mouth.

Sakura was about to take Amina's job and break their little spat when Eld appeared in front of her, his eyes crazed. "What is it?" she immediately asked, jumping to her feet.

"Captain needs us immediately."

She nodded grimly and smiled her friends good-bye after noticing their confused and concerned faces. They traversed through the castle, their footsteps stiff and urgent, ignoring the questioning looks of their comrades. Liesel, Jung, and Levi were already saddled and ready to go, their expressions grim. There was another soldier she had never seen before mounted on a supply cart, also prepared. Makimi seemed to understand the mood of her master, Levi, because she also was somber. It had been quite the surprise to find out that such a gentle horse belonged to no other than Humanity's Strongest, and she had to admit she was a bit curious as to what their dynamic was.

Sakura mounted Haruto and Eld mounted his dark brown horse and together they met up with the rest of their squad. "The group of twelve soldiers who stayed behind earlier yesterday to secure the next supply point hasn't sent a scout," Levi informed them. "If the town remains infested, we won't be able to count on them on our way back. Our mission is to save the most amount of soldiers and help secure the town. Erwin fears that those twelve soldiers are out of gas or blades, so this soldier will be carrying them. If the cart doesn't make it to town, we might as well call the mission a failure. Understood?"

"Yessir!"

The five members of Squad Levi and the soldier in charge of the extra supplies rode fast and hard to the next supply point. Because they were extremely important for their survival, Erwin usually assigned around ten soldiers to guard around three strongholds against any titans. They were supposed to send a scout (or two, depending how far they were) to the new supply point to confirm a safe passage and give the clear so that they could leave. So far, he had received the signal from two of the three main locations, but they were missing the nearest one.

After about an hour of blissfully safe riding, they reached the outskirts of the town. Sakura's whole body shivered when she felt the presence of all the titans, the sheer amount making it hard to exactly pinpoint how many titans there were. These were the moments when her sensor abilities were mostly lacking, because the density of titans made it hard to know where they were as well as their numbers.

"Sakura!" Levi called. "How many?"

"Upper tens, low twenties!" she shouted back.

"Eld! Stay behind and protect the supplies cart. When you see a green flare, come in and find us so we can distribute the gas and blades. If those supplies are lost, we'll all die. The rest of you, follow me and let's get this over with. Fire a red flare if you find the soldiers. I'll fire a black flare to signal a retreat."

Towns had medium maneuverability, but this one was one of the more developed ones so it had high stone buildings, perfect for the 3DMG. In the middle of the small city she could feel around seven soldiers huddled together, no doubt the survivors of the mission. But since Sakura wasn't supposed to be able to sense humans as well, she remained wisely quiet and followed Levi.

The first titan they saw was a six-meter class. Levi dispatched of it quickly, but the rest of his squad abandoned horses and switched to 3DMG mode. Levi usually hunted solo, leaving the rest of his squad members to fend for themselves. Since they were quite talented, the ratio of Squad Levi members needed to fell one titan was low, making it more productive to split in pairs. Obviously, Jung and Liesel worked best together, making Eld and Sakura the natural partners. Since the Captain had entrusted the supply cart to Eld, Sakura was at a natural disadvantage on the field, especially because she still had teamwork problems with Liesel. It would be more damaging to stick with the couple than to handle titans by herself, so she decided to make her way to the survivors, dispatching of any titans she was on her way.

Sakura killed four to finally reach the soldiers, who were standing in the topmost building of the town, high enough so that no titans could reach them. That didn't mean that they weren't trying, because around six titans were congregated around the tower, waiting for one of them to slip and jumping up and down to see if they could reach one.

This was far more than what she could handle, so she got out her flare gun and fired a red flare. Unfortunately, the sound and color attracted the attention of all the titans. Her eyes widened and her heart started beating faster when she saw the three seven-meter and three nine-meter classes running towards her, their expressions gleeful.

She started running away, using more gas than she should have to have a safe distance between them. The only way to get out of this one would be with the help of her chakra, but she could only do so if nobody was around. Either way, if someone _was _around, she could simply partner up and bring those six titans, making it a win-win situation. There was no one around, as expected, because the flare she had fired was now far away from her position; only someone with good hearing would be able to find her.

Sakura needed both speed and increased cutting power so she could dismember their arms. Her water chakra was mostly defensive, but her wind chakra… She attempted to pass her chakra to her blades, and although her blades grew blue for a second, they flickered out of existence almost immediately; though she had the chakra control down, the lack of experience and concentration were against her, since she was currently running away from a horde of titans with her 3DMG.

She heard another flare go off and she looked back to see the green representing a cleared path. At least the last six titans were still following her, and they were far away enough to not present too much danger.

Though she sensed the titan hiding between two buildings, she was going at such speeds that she couldn't dodge or avoid it. The titan reached its arm and grabbed her, the suddenness so violent that she was momentarily dizzy. She used her chakra-enhanced strength to break free of its tight hold, but her lightheadedness made it impossible to recover from the fall midair.

A strong pair of arms caught her and a black-haired man finished the titan that had momentarily caught her. Liesel landed on the roof of a building and deposited Sakura on the roof. Sakura groaned and shakily got up, mindful that they were in the middle of a battle. "Thanks, Liesel," she said, trying not to sound sick.

"Don't mention it. That was amazing, though. You got out of that hold with just your strength."

Sakura was going to make no comment about her observation, but luckily Jung landed next to them, shifting the focus of attention. "So Captain Levi should be leading the soldiers out by now, since I'm sure they're resupplied. That leaves us with the task of clearing this town of titans, yes? Let's do this."

They were about to finish their second titan when they saw a black flare in the outskirts of town. Why was Captain Levi ordering a retreat when they weren't finished? Still, questions would have to wait because––

"Sakura! Behind you!" Jung yelled.

The kunoichi felt someone push her to the side, sending her flying off int the air and it was only because of her ninja reflexes that she managed to right herself and set a grappling hook to a wall so that she could propel herself up and land on the roof. As soon as her feet stepped on the titles she heard a bloodcurdling scream. Sakura whipped her head and saw with growing horror as her blonde teammate's abdomen was munched, blood flowing like rivers to the air.

"Liesel!" Jung cried out, his yell betraying the despair and pain he was feeling.

Sakura could only stare at the scene, feeling her hopes draining. If she wanted to get out of this one alive, she would have to use her chakra and reveal herself to the Survey Corps. Not only that, but she didn't exactly know how using her chakra would help save them considering the titans had only one weak point and could easily regenerate. None of the jutsu she knew would help out, and her chakra-enhanced strength was great for fights against other humans, but for titans several times her size and weight? She still hadn't successfully blended her taijutsu with her 3DMG skills.

Jung cut the titan's nape, skillfully avoiding the mouths and hands of the other four titans, and got Liesel out of the titan's mouth. He landed next to Sakura and, after successfully securing Liesel in Jung's back, they started running away from the remaining giants. However, the blonde's added weight did not help Jung, because he started lagging behind and using more gas than Sakura in less time. Not only that, but Liesel was growing paler and paler by the second.

Maybe she could healed her? Liesel had not only saved her once, but she had done so twice and once at the expense of her own life by the looks of it. They only needed to find a place they could rest in for a few moments so that Sakura could heal her. But just how would they be able to create enough distance when those titans were hot on their heels?

Jung suddenly stopped and landed roughly in one of the house's roof. Sakura, confused, did the same and came down next to them. Jung crouched and placed a gentle hand on Liesel's brow, wiping the dirt and sweat. Liesel's green eyes held such sadness and love that Sakura felt like she was intruding much more than when she heard them having sex all those times; this was much more intimate than those cries and moans.

"Sakura," he stated softly. "I need you to take Liesel and run away from here. I'll hold the titans long enough so that you two can be safe."

She was about to protest, but refrained when she saw her blonde teammate shake her head ruefully. "No, no… I have lost too many loved ones and… I'm dying anyway, Jung. I have the wonderful opportunity to choose how to die, and I want to die next to you."

"My death won't be pretty, Liesel… I don't want you to see it."

"Jung, let me stay. Together we can try something."

He looked up to her and shook his head firmly. "You're our sensor, Sakura. If you die, then we would have lost a very valuable ability and soldier."

"But Jung, our survival chances increase if––"

"No. As the second-in-command, I'm ordering you to follow Captain Levi's flare and _retreat_."

"But––"

"Sakura," Liesel called, and even though her voice was frail, the underlying authority was still there, "I saved your life. Don't waste it now and get away."

The titans got closer and as much as she wanted to fight them, she thought of the promise she made to Mikasa, Eren, and Armin to always be there to look after them and the promise she made to herself to keep Amina, Petra, and Oluo alive. If she was dead or horribly injured, she couldn't keep those promises, right?

So with defeated eyes and a selfish heart she followed Jung's orders, feeling heavier than she ever had before in her life. She looked back one last time and was strangely satisfied that her last image of Jung was of him felling a titan and of Liesel was of her shakily getting up with an arm across her stomach, looking as proud as she always had.

She pretended she hadn't heard their death cries, because that was just too much.

The soldiers they had saved were sitting on the cart, their faces grim and terrified. Out of the original twelve, only five remained, and it showed that whatever they had seen wasn't nice. She was grateful that Haruto was there and trotted towards her as soon as she landed, because today was definitely not the day to part with her horse.

Levi approached her from atop Makimi, his gaze piercing. "Where are Liesel and Jung?"

Sakura swallowed and nudged Haruto to get closer to the group. "Dead," she croaked.

He stiffened, but other than that his expression remained the same. "I see… How?"

"Saving me."

"Then their deaths weren't meaningless. But for now, let's go; our mission doesn't end until we're back."

The ride back to the supply point was extremely quiet and dark, each one dealing with their own depressing thoughts. Eld seemed just as devastated as her to find out their teammates had died, no doubt flashing back to the death of his best friend. In the end, it was always the titan's fault, but this time Sakura could feel the guilt gnawing her skin and mind, infiltrating her deepest thoughts.

She hurried Haruto until she was riding next to the Captain. There was a question she needed answered. "Captain! If you don't mind my asking, why did you order the retreat before we killed the titans?"

Levi kept looking forward, but she knew he heard her question by the narrowing of his gaze. She sent chakra to her eardrums, hoping to receive an answer over the sound of the hooves. "I didn't want any more deaths," he murmured, and if it hadn't been for Sakura's enhanced hearing she would've never caught that. "Don't question your superior's orders," he calmly replied, loud enough for her to hear.

But it was too late; she had already heard what he wanted to do and Sakura realized that maybe she wasn't the only one feeling heavy and laden with guilt.

* * *

><p><strong>I take full responsibility for that travesty of a poem but the lyrics of the Japanese song are from Uso by Sid. I know, I hated myself when I included those lyrics but it was a necessary part because there was no way Sebastian would pass up the opportunity to listen to a song in another language and it would be awkward that I knew what song I was talking about but you guys didn't. Well, just know it was for a good cause and it (hopefully) will never happen again. <strong>Also, I promise the angst in this chapter will definitely be toned down in later chapters. I will probably come back in a couple of months and rewrite it just in case it still makes me cringe then.<strong>**

**For those interested, the story of Eifah and Adalie is inspired by the story of Orpheus and Eurydice. Eurydice was bitten by a viper and Orpheus played songs of such sorrow that made the gods weep. They told Orpheus to journey to the underworld and his music convinces Hades and Persephone to take back Eurydice with two conditions: that he walks in front of her and doesn't look back until they reach the upper world. Unfortunately, as soon as Orpheus reached the upper world he looked back to see if Eurydice was there, forgetting that _both _of them had to reach the upper world. She vanished forever after this. Of course, the poem was adapted to use Sina, Rose, and Maria as the goddesses, and I actually have a little head-canon on the lore surrounding these goddesses that extends past the Wallists, and will use Sebastian as a way to introduce a little bit more of my head-SnK world to you.**

**For those of you who have read Chapter 56, I will advise you to not worry about it. I will not change anything major in the story until I find out fully about what is going on.**

**Oh, and I don't think I made it very clear, but Sakura was "injured" before the 35th expedition, in December. The 37th took place around March. **

**A big thank you to Guest, Bum reviews, AmeRaSora, Lucia Tsukiyomi-hime, Basia Orci, catxangel, FairiesDescent, cj1of4, cherryblossom1423, mun3litKnight, Liber Fatum, Aka kakao, pierce through the heart, sheep-a-rama, XSilentxAngelX, mosi-san, brokenmaelstrom, and Rose Rain 7 for being so awesome and leaving wonderful reviews. Also, a big shout out to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites! You guys keep my muse very happy!**

**Reviews make my day,**

**Penpal**


	10. Motion

Sakura knew she had to get up, and her muscles were perfectly able to move after the intensive healing session she had as soon as she arrived, but she was too exhausted to even lift her arm. Liesel and Jung had been declared missing in action because they hadn't been able to retrieve their bodies, but she had heard their deaths with her very own ears. Her own weakness had put her in that perilous situation and in the end it was them who ended up paying for her mistakes with their own lives. She had grown complacent, believing that she was the best of the best, that she couldn't die because she was an _iryo-nin _and talented _kunoichi _by her own rights, but in the end her worth lied in her abilities as a sensor and not as a soldier.

What a fucking surprise.

A firm knock interrupted her thoughts and she moaned, stretching the bedsheets to cover her head. She wasn't even grieving to begin with. She wasn't even proving that their sacrifice was worth it by doing something with her life, anything to show that their deaths hadn't been in vain. What would she tell Liesel's parents? Oh, it would be delightful to let them know that they lost both their son and daughter in only three months. Ah, and she forgot to add that their future son-in-law (well, by the _sounds _of it) was gone too. What a great family reunion that would be.

"Sakura! We know you're there!" Amina yelled, her voice annoyed.

"Please, open the door for us!" Petra continued, her pleading much more gentle but no less worried.

She groaned, "Go away." Ugh, her voice sounded like shit; now they wouldn't leave her alone.

"We won't leave you there moping!"

Her eyes narrowed and her expression grew murderous, though no one was around to see it. "Oh, I don't know, Amina, maybe I'm _grieving_ because half of my fucking team died. Just maybe."

She heard what sounded like a scold and an annoyed mutter. "Fine, fine, sorry for being insensitive. Still, this is the second day you've spent locked in your room. You have to go outside and eat something."

"The only ones that can give me orders are the Captain, Squad Leaders, and Commander Erwin, and they haven't requested that I go outside. So no, I _don't_ have to go outside and eat something."

"Are you really going to pull that?"

"Yes, Petra, I am. Now, if you're done, you––"

"_No_! We're _not _done. You have to let us in, at least. Please… You can't do this to yourself."

Sakura resisted the urge to tell her that she _deserved _this, but that wouldn't exactly help her chances in convincing Petra that she was perfectly sane. She sat up, her joints popping, and stood up slowly afterwards, taking her sweet time to reach the door. Sh knew that they would give her some time before approaching her, but she didn't think they would try sosoon. She took a hold of the knob and turned, revealing a hopeful Petra and disgruntled Amina, and stared at them with raised eyebrows. The two girls scrunched their noses at Sakura's odor, and Sakura almost slammed the door on them had Amina not put her foot in and stopped it.

"Ouch! Damn you!"

"Amina!" Petra growled. "You're not helping!"

Sakura stared on impassively, her expression neither more sympathetic or annoyed. "What are you two doing here?"

"Dragging you to take a bath, that's what," Amina growled.

She thought that Petra would protest to that, but she barged in and strolled to her closet, choosing the warmest clothes in her wardrobe and taking her bathrobe. Sakura was about to protest but Amina gave her one of the iciest stares she had ever seen. "Don't even think about it. You smell horrible. I'm surprised Captain Levi even let you get away looking like that."

"I haven't seen him," she replied rather weakly.

Petra ambled by and signaled for both of them to follow her, which Sakura begrudgingly did. She was thankful that the Special Operations Squad's wing was isolated from the rest of headquarters, because she didn't think she would be able to handle being seen in this sad state. It was one thing to look like mourner behind closed doors, but once she went outside and let the world see just how defeated she looked, she couldn't help but feel the shame burning inside of her.

At least Liesel was angry; she was just mopey and pathetic.

Luckily they didn't come across anyone else during their little walk, and the bath was already drawn up, meaning that they had already planned on getting her out of the room to begin with.

"Undress," Amina ordered.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "Right now?"

"No, tomorrow. Of course right now."

"With you two inside?"

"Do you have something that we don't?"

"Um, no," Sakura replied slowly. "But I can take my own bath."

Petra sighed and shook her head. "It's a favor, Sakura. Besides, this is not the first time we see each other naked. There were many incidents back in––"

"Back in camp, yeah, I remember," Sakura pitched in, recalling with fondness all those embarrassing times when girls walked on each other because the door's lock was broken and no one came around to fix it in their stay. It was dubbed the "Peek-a-Boob Bathroom" for that reason, but yet girls still used it.

Amina scoffed and went behind the bathtub, picking up a bottle with a liquid and a bar of soap. "My mother sent me this a few weeks ago. I haven't gotten around to using it, but I thought today might be a good day."

She didn't need more coaxing and Sakura abandoned the layers of her uniform that she still hadn't taken off from two days ago. The muscles in her body instantly relaxed once she got in the water and she let out a contented sigh. Amina massaged her scalp with that liquid her mother sent meanwhile Petra washed her back, relaxing the tense muscles. No one commented about the lack of scars and marks on her body except from the imprints of the body belt, which everyone had.

The three women mostly chatted about Amina's family back inside Wall Sina, how they were begging her to come back but she kept refusing. In fact, she thought they would soon stoop low enough to ask Commander Erwin to persuade her, but both Petra and Sakura doubted that he would pay attention to the wants of the Burgeis family.

"They died because of me," Sakura confessed quietly. "I got distracted and that's what happened. I wasn't the one who paid anything for my mistakes. How am I supposed to tell their parents that their children died to protect… me?"

Petra gentled in her kneading. "You don't have to tell their parents anything. You're a soldier. Casualties happen all the time… Are you going to start apologizing for every death?"

"This death could've been avoided if I––"

"Did you murder them?" Amina questioned, her voice rough, yet her hands still soft in her ministrations.

"W-What? No! Titans ate them."

"Then don't feel guilty."

Petra chuckled a bit forcefully. "I think that what Amina is trying to say is that you can't blame yourself for their deaths when the titans are the actual enemies. You didn't push them into their mouths, you didn't stab them with your blades. You should mourn for their deaths, but you shouldn't feel guilty."

Sakura stared ahead at the stone wall, processing their words. They were right, one hundred percent, and her mind had accepted that from the beginning, but her heart had refused to take her reasoning in. It had closed off, barring logic and evidence, and insisted on beating her up, constricting her throat and her lungs.

But their words did make her feel better. It no longer hurt to breathe, she felt better about herself, and all the turmoil that had kept her awake the last two nights started fading.

The quiet and their heavenly hands lulled her into a light sleep, her body finally surrendering itself to the tiredness that weighed her down.

Her sleep was about to deepen when three harsh knocks snapped her wide awake, her body jerking awake violently. Petra was accidentally splashed, but she was too surprised to complain.

"Sakura," Levi called, his voice a bit less indifferent that usual.

She gulped and stared at Petra questioningly. She shrugged, her expression as confused as hers. "Y-Yes?"

"We're having a meeting in my office in ten minutes. Don't be late."

"Yessir."

Sakura sent some chakra to her auditory system and heard Levi walk away. She frowned and got out of the bathtub, completely losing her previous embarrassment over nudity. Sakura dried herself with her robe and quickly dressed herself in her warm uniform before she caught a cold meanwhile Amina and Petra finished cleaning the bathroom.

Her two best friends were about to leave when Sakura spontaneously caught them by the shoulder, whipped them around, and enveloped them in a bone-crushing hug. "I know I don't say this enough, but thank you… I don't want to think what I would do without you two."

Petra hugged her back tightly. "Don't worry about those things. I know that we can't make any promises, but we're very good. Our chances of dying have significantly decreased since we graduated."

Amina chuckled and untangled herself from the embrace. "Yeah, even I feel a bit foolish for saying those things back in May. Look how far we've come."

"You better go, Sakura. Captain Levi sounds scary."

"Eh, you get used to him. But you're right, I'll be going now."

Before going to whatever meeting her captain had planned, she dropped her clothes off in her bed and combed her hair. The strands had grown longer, now reaching past her chin, and she might need to cut it soon but honestly she was starting to like the length.

She felt two chakra signatures before knocking on the door. If she had to give an educated guess, she would go with Eld, only because she had gotten used to his presence before. She knocked the door and waited for Levi to let her through. She opened the door, saluted, and sat down on the vacant seat across his desk.

"There will be some changes to the Special Operations Squad," Levi stated, his usually casual voice tinged with seriousness. "Since its inception eighteen months ago, around four teams have been completely wiped off. That's sixteen of the best gone in just a year and a half. However, neither Erwin nor I can deny the usefulness of my squad. I used to have only five members because it could be divided into two pairs and me, since I work solo. We have decided to add a new spot to the team, bringing it up to six members.

"At first this seems like it is a small, but it will bring another big change to the dynamic in the team. There will now be three pairs, and two teams of three. I have to get used to working with someone else, and we all will have to get used to working with three new members. I have decided to put the Special Operations Squad on standby until we get used to these new changes. The purpose is to reduce the amount of deaths."

He stared at them impassively and raised an eyebrow. "Well, any questions?"

"Who are the candidates for the new positions?" Eld asked, stealing the question right out of her mouth.

"There are none; I have already chosen."

"Who are they?" she asked, the curiosity killing her. Last time he had taken two days to choose a candidate, so it shouldn't come off as a surprise for him to have chosen already, but this time he had picked _three_, not one. She didn't want to doubt his skills, but two days was too little to select those she would trust with her life, in her opinion.

"Gunther Schultz, Petra Ral, and Oluo Bozado. You should know Gunther, Eld, meanwhile the other two of are in the 102nd Class, actually. You must know them, right? …Hey, are you even listening?"

Oh, she was, but the words weren't exactly registering in her mind. Petra and Oluo… part of the Special Operations Squad? They might die pitiful deaths like Liesel and Jung's? No, they were supposed to be safe, rise the ranks in the teams that had less casualties!

Then again, this gave her the perfect opportunity to keep them safe. If something went wrong, she could always body-flicker and get them out of harm's way. But for that she would need to combine her taijutsu and other ninja skills with her 3DMG, because an emergency wouldn't exactly happen in the most opportune moments.

She felt something nudge her ribs and she jolted, shooting Eld a confused stare. He nervously beckoned at Levi with his head and Sakura turned to him with an embarrassed smile.

He did not look amused.

"Yeah, I know them. They're… Friends."

He raised an eyebrow, but said nothing about it. "Well, at least that means I won't have to spend too much time looking for them. The other reason why I called you two is to clear a small mess. Usually the next senior member takes the role of second-in-command, but you have seniority in the Survey Corps" —he tilted his head towards Eld–– "meanwhile you have seniority of a day in the Special Operations Squad," he finished, looking at Sakura meaningfully. "I don't want to get involved with this shit so you two choose who wants to be second-in-command."

"Eld is more than qualified."

"I believe Sakura deserves it."

Levi's eyes glinted, as if something had caught his interest, and he got up from his seat to go stand beside Eld. "Oh? This is interesting. Well, I guess it's not important right now considering that we won't be going on this month's expedition, but since you two are incapable of reaching a conclusion, then I will deal with this."

Well, she knew for sure she wouldn't get it because he didn't trust her with a leadership position.

He sat back down and leaned forwards. "Don't tell your comrades what I just told you; I will be the one to talk to them about this. If you have no further questions, you are dismissed."

Sakura stood up rather stiffly and quickly exited the office, heading to the training forest with brisk steps. The news her captain had just told her changed the game. Now more than ever she was directly linked to the survival and safety of two of her precious people.

Their membership in the Special Operations Squad had heavy implications for her training. She needed to find a way to become stronger than what she already was (without outright revealing her chakra) and she needed to devise a last resort plan that merged her chakra with her 3DMG skills. She hoped she would never have to reveal her kunoichi status, but she had to admit she wouldn't keep her stupid secret at the expense of Petra or Oluo's life; she had chosen to keep her chakra a secret to protect them, after all.

What happened with Liesel and Jung was a rude wakeup call to chakra's limitations. She was nigh invincible against another human, and perhaps could easily take down a titan or two with her chakra, but the horde she had experienced had left her with an empty sense of uselessness. Sakura thought of herself as special, wielding godly power in a world without gods, but her current repertoire of jutsu didn't help her at all. Her super strength couldn't kill ten meter tall monsters that would just generate a head later on. Her jutsu wouldn't be able to distract titans who may or may not feel pain, and if they did, they did not feel it in the same level as humans.

The chakra scalpel had worked, but only because she was downing one titan; if it had been more than one, she would've had to body-flicker out of the way to avoid the other titan, and she still would've had a problem cutting all of titans. In short, she didn't feel like such a one-man army anymore, and it was a humbling feeling.

The forest sported taller than average trees, the Survey Corps's attempt to recreate the giant trees in Wall Maria and beyond. Wall Rose used to have trees as tall as these, but that was before the population explosion inside Wall Rose, which prompted the government to cut down many forests and use the lumber to build new houses. The titan course for the Special Operations Squad was bigger than the others, as well as much harder to clear because titans were positioned in tricky places that required a lot of skill to reach.

She went to the supply's cabin and got an older-looking 3DMG. After attaching it, she fired the hook to the nearest tree and started adapting to the kinks of the older model to avoid any accident. She really should've used her own 3DMG, tailored to her own style of maneuverability over speed, but she didn't want to go to her room at the moment.

Once she located the first titan, she put her plan to work.

The first time she had discovered the body-flicker technique, she had thought it was a transportation technique. After trying it a few more times, Sakura realized it was simply quick burst of chakra that moved the body at such high speeds that it almost looked like teleportation. That meant that body-flicker couldn't be done in mid-air, where there was nothing to use as initial momentum. It could, however, be done in mid-air after clashing with another person, because the clash provided momentum that could then be used to release chakra and move away.

However, that didn't mean that the two-dimensional body-flicker couldn't be used in conjunction with the 3DMG.

She attached a hook at the nape of the titan and as soon as she had finished slashing, she let go of the hooks and body-flickered away. Sakura got her first real surprise when she over-estimated the amount of chakra needed to land in the next tree branch and appeared too far away from both the previous and next branch, relying on her 3DMG to get back in the game and not fall.

Still, that kill had taken less than five seconds. She had sent her hook to the titan, slashed the nape, and had gotten around three meters away, all in less than five seconds. If she conserved her chakra wisely and used the chakra burst mixed with 3DMG, she could kill more than ten titans in a single minute. Of course, then there was the question of how long she could keep that fighting style without tiring herself too much, and she did rely a lot on the presence of trees, but still, it was incredible.

Sakura laughed and body-flickered, her heart dropping at the feeling of falling, but feeling comfortable once she sent a hook to another high tree branch. She continued going this way, chakra burst quickly followed by attaching herself to another tree branch, until she accidentally crashed against a rather thick branch she had overlooked meanwhile she body-flickered.

The hit was mostly focused on her upper abdomen, and it knocked the wind out of her, leaving her breathless and dizzy. She immediately started falling headfirst into the ground, and the panic that encompassed her being was so overwhelming she almost froze. Luckily, her kunoichi instincts kicked in, and she righted herself enough to send a hook to a lower tree branch and carefully descend to the ground.

Once she was safe, she sheathed her swords and put her hands on her stomach, letting her healing chakra alleviate her pain. That had been risky, and if she had been around ten centimeters lower, she may have hit her neck, killing her instantly. Body-flickering was excellent, but actually using it as a means of traveling was extremely dangerous. The speeds she went in covered such large distances in such little time that it virtually left her with zero reaction time, even if her reflexes were less than a split second fast. The worse thing was that even if she honed her mind to increase her reaction time, she still wouldn't be able to change the trajectory because of the velocity behind her movement.

This posed a risk to titan-killing, because titans, unlike trees, weren't stagnant and moved with almost no predictability. She needed to practice a lot before she became proficient at combining 3DMG with taijutsu, but how could she practice if people would be able to see her?

She hated leaving things to chance, preferring to not have to experiment and improvise in the middle of the battlefield, but this time she didn't have any other choice. At least she knew that it was possible to combine taijutsu and 3DMG, something that had nagged her for a while.

Sakura frowned and looked down at her glowing hands. Seeing the glow reminded her of another pressing matter she had almost completely forgotten about. She stopped the healing process and got out her blades, carefully studying the steel. It was strong, yes, but that wasn't exactly the question. She applied some of her chakra to it and a jagged line of blue chakra surrounded the steel. She knew it wasn't perfect right now and could smooth the chakra, but for now this would do. She approached a tree and slashed with all her might.

The trunk was completely cut, and in seconds the tree started falling down. However, the pressure from the chakra as well as Sakura's strength made the steel break in two. She sighed, removed the broken blades, and reattached new ones. Perhaps if she didn't use all her force the blades would survive?

The tree was now cut halfway, but the blades ended up breaking slightly. The steel wasn't compatible with chakra, it seemed, but it shattered after the first hit. Still, titan flesh wasn't as strong as wood, so maybe she could get a couple kills before they finally broke under the pressure of chakra.

Sakura sheathed her blades and headed back to the Special Operations hall, intent on getting some rest. Her experiments had mostly been successful, a nice surprise for what started as a pathetic day. She couldn't wait to see how the squad's teamwork would improve having Petra and Oluo as her comrades, and was intent on perfecting some of the co-op maneuvers they had devised back in their trainee days, when they thought they would be inseparable.

She vowed to herself that she would never let anything happen to either of them, her secret be damned. If she could sacrifice her life for them, she sure as well could give up her freedom for them as well.

* * *

><p>An incessant person knocking on her door woke her from her dreams. Her stomach growled, berating her for not eating dinner yesterday, and she forced her bleary eyes shut, hoping that whoever was outside her room would take the hint and leave her alone. However, either there was an important message waiting for her or the person was obtuse because it continued for what seemed like a minute.<p>

With a growl she got out of the bed and violently opened the door, looking down on an annoyed woman with an unamused stare. She was ready for a spar, since she was wearing her shorts and a simple white shirt. "The sun's not even out, Petra."

"When were you going to tell me?"

She groaned and leaned her head on the doorframe. "Really? You seriously woke me up for––"

"You didn't tell me that I got into the freaking _Special Operations Squad_."

"Captain told me not to tell you because he was."

"Oh, so mean Captain Levi followed you everywhere and just _made sure_ you followed his instructions."

Sakura frowned at her. "Your sarcasm is not appreciated. And I quite frankly don't know what the problem is. You found out, didn't you?"

"I made a fool out of myself," she hissed at the kunoichi, going past her and entering her room. "I just stared at him like a fish out of the water for like five minutes! He must think I'm an idiot! Hey, don't laugh!"

She continued chuckling, unable to get the image of a dumbstruck Petra and a deadpan Levi out of her head. Maybe she should've given Petra a heads up that big news were coming her way, but now it was too late. She walked towards Petra with her arms raised in a placating manner. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's just…"

Surprisingly, her eyes softened and the shorter female let out a breathless chuckle. "Yeah, I tend to give excellent first impressions to my superiors. Remember when I soiled my pants the first expedition?"

"Unfortunately I didn't get to see, but I did hear about it."

"So I'm used to living with embarrassment. It's just that Captain Levi is… Well, he's in an another league."

"You're in another league as well, you know."

Petra smiled and observed the room, as if measuring something. "Well, so we're back to sharing rooms, huh?"

"What?"

"Our hallways only has five rooms, but now that there's six of us… I told Captain Levi you wouldn't mind sharing room with me. Is that alright?"

Sakura grinned. "Of course I don't mind! We'll move your bed and things after training today."

The younger woman sighed audibly. "I don't know if I'll ever get used to those training times. Seven-thirty through three with a one hour lunch? Are you guys crazy?"

She shrugged. "The first couple of days you feel the heat, but after that you get used to it. First half hour is just warmup, just like before. The next hour is sparring, but this is because we observe each other's spars to better understand fighting styles and weaknesses that influence 3DMG. Half hour break and we change out of our sparring clothes, one hour of exercise, running laps and lifting weights, half hour of planning a new strategy to implement during the titan course, an hour of individual 3DMG practice in the forest, lunch, and the last three hours we go through different titan courses, once individually, a couple of times with previous strategies, once with the new strategy we came up with before lunch, and the last time in pairs. Of course, not every day is like this, but that's the usual."

"Wow, it sounds like a lot."

"We're a team that usually kills more than ten titans per expedition, guaranteed, because we encounter the most amount of titans."

"We'll clear the way for the expedition, right?"

Sakura nodded and started looking through her wardrobe for the day's clothes. Even though she had complained about being awakened early, she had to wake up to eat breakfast anyway. She chose a dark blue shirt, almost the exact shade of the dark wing on the Survey Corps's insignia and a pair of black shorts. "We're supposed to make sure the first ten kilometers are clear for the expedition. Before I joined this happened the day before so that we could resupply, but now it happens on the same day. The Commander simply added another supply cart, even though it was a bit risky but he said it was necessary." She removed her nightgown and started putting on her sparring clothes.

"Not going to lie, this is really exciting. We're doing something big."

She put on her dark blue shirt first. "It's big and dangerous, Petra. Much more dangerous. My teammates…"

"I know, I know," she replied, much more somber. "But if you think about it, the survival rate is roughly the same."

"Petra, Liesel Sommer and Jung Busch were amazing soldiers. They were extremely talented and they were gone, just like that. Survival rate doesn't mean anything when people like that are just killed off."

"What are you trying to say?"

"There are no guarantees in here. No matter how much you train, no matter how good you are, no matter how excellent your chemistry with the team is, we're not guaranteed to survive the next expedition. We can only hope to be lucky."

Petra's normally jovial eyes narrowed in seriousness. "I know what I was chosen for, Sakura. I have been given a chance to do something great, and I won't just throw it away. You won't convince me to quit this."

She shook her head animatedly and started putting on her shoes with a secret smile. "No, no, I'm not trying to convince you to quit. I'm actually happy that you and Oluo are with me. I'm just making sure you know what you signed up for."

"I do, so can we go have breakfast now?"

The kunoichi laughed and put on her shorts. "We should eat nutritiously because I have a strange feeling we're going to have a harsh day."

The two women entered the empty mess hall and sat next to a tousled Oluo, annoying him by eating from his plate. In all honesty, Sakura was doing him a favor, because with his large portion he wouldn't go through the day without throwing up. Unlike normal training, where people ate a heavy breakfast and light lunch, the Special Ops members should eat a breakfast easy on the stomach and a full lunch, simply because the first half of the day was full of acrobatics and movement.

She had learned this the hard way.

Oluo grumbled all the way to the training fields about how unfair we had been, but a sunny smile from Petra shut him up immediately and made his eyes sparkle, causing Sakura to gag a little.

Eld and a black-haired man, probably Gunther, were already on the warm-up field, but the Captain was nowhere in sight. That was strange, since he was usually as punctual as he was neat, but she didn't think much of it.

"Hello," she greeted the newcomer with a friendly smile. "I'm Sakura. You must be Gunther, right?"

Gunther nodded and grinned back. "Eld has told me a lot about you. Good job with Rosalind," he finished with a wink, causing Eld to blush furiously and her two best friends to simply stare ahead in confusion. He turned his head and acknowledged Petra and Oluo with a tilt of his head. "You must be Petra Ral and Oluo Bozado, right?" The two nodded back eagerly, causing an amused smile to graze his features. "I'm Gunther Schultz, and this is Eld Jinn. I'm new to the squad, like you two."

Sakura felt her superior's chakra approaching them. She turned and saluted him, and the rest of the team followed suit. "Good morning, Captain," they said in unison.

"You sound like fresh meat this morning," he replied in his usual calm tone. There were dark bags under his eyes and his face was ashen, giving her a strange sense of déjà vu. He was also wearing a white shirt and long shorts, which was also weird. Was he fighting? "I haven't heard that in a while…" he murmured, and Sakura was sure everyone but her missed that. "I hope introductions are over. If you don't know each other, you soon will, anyway. Let's warmup."

Just like Sakura had told Petra over, they followed the schedule completely. By the end of the exercise, Sakura felt her muscles fully awake and ready to start the training session.

Though spars were usually boring to her, it was quite exciting today because she would see completely new fights. Gunther was paired up with Eld, and, surprisingly, Gunther won by sheer strength. It was very apparent that they had fought beforehand, because there were some moves the blond had tried to pull that Gunther had easily blocked, and the only explanation was experience. She could already detect that the two of them would make an excellent pair, simply because Eld's agility and quickness went well with Gunther's sturdiness and brawn.

Next was Oluo and Petra, and it felt like a trip down memory lane, considering she had watched this numerous time in the 102nd Squad and in her early months in the Survey Corps. Petra took complete advantage of her petiteness and mostly focused on retaliating, but in the end Oluo won by making her lose her balance and placing her under a chokehold. Sakura had to hold in a laugh at how destroyed Oluo looked after winning, since he was probably beating himself up for hurting his precious Petra. She, on the other hand, was all sun and smiles, happy that she had fought with him after months, apparently.

She started walking to the next field, thinking they were done with the spar, but the Captain cleared his throat and stared at her with a raised eyebrow. She tilted her head to the side, confused that he had put on his sparring gloves, and asked, "Aren't we running laps?"

"You're sparring against me."

Sparring against the Captain? That had never happened. The Captain usually just observed and taught his Squad, but he never actually trained with them, since he got his practice with the Commander. However, now it made sense for him to fight with them, since there was an even number of members.

Sakura approached the Captain with a certain hesitation and put on her sparring gloves. Well, that was slightly unfair; he knew her fighting style, but she knew next to nothing from his. Maybe she should lose this spar to not make it look suspicious? But then again, it might look suspicious if she purposely lost, so what was the correct answer?

Levi lunged at her, and Sakura made her decision; she would make this as hard as she could for him. He aimed a punch at her jaw, but she stepped aside to completely avoid the attack. She targeted his chest, launching a kick, but he grabbed her foot with one hand, much to her surprise, forcing her to stand on one leg. She knew he was going to try to knock her foot now that her balance was shaky, so she hopped closer to him, putting force behind her trapped foot, causing him to lose his grip and let her go.

He was put immediately on the defensive, so Sakura used this to her advantage by aiming a roundhouse kick with her right foot, but Levi anticipated this, blocking her kick slightly but letting it continue, then blocking her off-target kick to his shoulders, and grabbing her right leg and kicking her lost her balance but clutched his shoulders tightly, taking him with her to the ground.

The wind was knocked out of her lungs, but with the Captain straddling her hips and going for the chokehold, she couldn't let herself breathe for too long. She used her abdominal and thigh muscles to pivot her hips, making the Captain lose his control and lose balance. Sakura shifted their bodies and now straddled his thighs and covered his upper body with her own, using her weight and strength to keep him down.

Levi, however, was determined to not lose and took her by surprise by removing his arms from underneath her body, immediately going for the chokehold. Sakura squirmed and lightly punched Levi repeatedly in the ribs, hoping to escape his hold, and managed to weaken it slightly. She took advantage of this opportunity and moved her thighs upwards to now straddle his abdomen and buried her face in his neck meanwhile their bodies fought for the top position.

He released her neck, grabbed her shoulders, and flipped her so that he was now on top in her exact same position, straddling her abdomen. She knew she wasn't going to be able to win this fight like this, deciding to finish it with her signature taijutsu once they were both standing. Sakura rebelled against his hold and even with his light punches she managed to turn her body around and get on her knees with her hands on the ground, like a dog.

Now she could just stand up and throw Levi off, but before she could even put force on her lower body he grabbed her arms and used his muscular legs to roll them forward, with Sakura facing the sky and the Captain underneath her, keeping her neck in a chokehold. He wrapped his legs around her hips to keep her thrashing under control, but she wasn't making any progress; his grasp was very tight and she was physically weaker than him without her chakra.

"Give up," he breathed harshly against her ear, his pants tickling her sweaty neck.

Sakura grunted and tried to shake her head, but the Captain's grip made it hard. In response to her jerking he tightened his legs and pushed down whenever she moved around.

She could almost feel the bruises forming on her neck, and even though it hurt her pride, she reluctantly tapped out. The Captain immediately released his hold on her neck and hips and Sakura rolled away to lie almost next to him, panting harshly.

Levi sat up and then stood up, making a noise of disapproval when he saw all the grass stains on his shorts. "We have a break now. Return in half an hour and meet in the gym." With that he left the training field, followed by Gunther and Eld, who were chatting animatedly about their fight.

Petra approached her with a smile and extended her hand towards her. Sakura smiled weakly and took it, letting herself be hoisted up. "That was so good. Captain Levi must be insanely strong to beat you."

"He did something on his first try that I haven't done for the past three years," Oluo grumbled.

Sakura huffed and wiped the sweat from her forehead. "He had the advantage of forcing me to play his game. I was doomed to lose the moment the fight turned into one of strength. And he knew my moves."

But even though Levi had won the fight, Sakura had managed to keep her kunoichi power and reflexes under control, making the loss bittersweet.

"Still, I know your moves and still can't stop him."

"Alright, alright, yeah, he's damn good; makes me more comfortable knowing that he's our leader."

* * *

><p><em>"The Strength of a Hundred Seal suits and complements our role. What were the four rules I taught you when you first became my apprentice?"<em>

_"First, no medic ninja shall ever stop medical treatment until the lives of their party members have come to an end. Second, no medic ninja shall ever stand on the front lines. Third, no medic ninja shall ever die until they are the last of their platoon. Fourth, only those medic ninja who have mastered the Strength of a Hundred Technique of the ninja art Creation Rebirth are permitted to discard the above-mentioned laws."_

_"Your memorization skills are quite impressive. Anyway, yes, as you can see, this technique basically allows you to discard these rules because they would become a hindrance at our level. The Creation Rebirth technique is a regeneration technique. By releasing the chakra stored in the Strength of a Hundred Seal, we can speed up the mitosis of our cells, healing any wounds we've sustained. The child technique of the Creation Rebirth, the Strength of a Hundred Technique, regenerates wounds automatically, but this will take time to master._

_"I trust in your aptitude with chakra control and estimate that once you gather enough chakra in your Strength of a Hundred Seal, you'll be able to automatically use Remote Healing and Chakra Rebirth. These are last resort techniques, making it a bit hard to train in, but we're going to run some chakra control exercises that will prepare you when the time comes."_

_"Yes, Shisou."_

* * *

><p><em>A red-haired woman opened the door, looking ecstatic from her vantage point on the wheelchair. "Ah, Sakura-chan, what a surprise! Come in, come in!"<em>

_She bowed to her elder and gave her a bright smile. "Good afternoon, Kushina-san. My mother sends her regards and wants me to warn you that she'll be taking you out later today."_

_Kushina backed off, letting Sakura pass, and maneuvered her wheelchair to close the door. She led Sakura through their house and looked up at her with a mischievous smile."Is she? Mebuki should know that when I get out I don't come back until very late."_

_The younger kunoichi giggled, suddenly remembering her mother's interesting drunken moments late at night. "Luckily she doesn't have a mission any time soon, so I'm sure she can take a little time off."_

_"That's good to hear! But enough about your mother; I'll hear about her soon enough. How are your lessons with Tsunade-sama coming along?"_

_"Very well. Shisou is teaching me her Seal of a Hundred Technique."_

_Her violet eyes widened, completely taken off guard. "The Seal of a Hundred Technique? Wow, Sakura, that is a great honor. Only two people in the world know how to achieve it, and only one is able to actually use it, that of course being Tsunade-sama. She must see great potential in you. Do you want water or tea?" she asked when the they reached their dining room._

_"Water is fine. Mother and Father are very proud. Suguru can't really say that a Sannin is training him."_

_Kushina handed her the cup and Sakura murmured her thanks when she saw the disapproving look in the older kunoichi's eyes. "Now, Sakura, you know it's not good for you to compare yourself with Suguru-kun. You each have your strengths and weaknesses."_

_"My Academy years left a lasting impression."_

_"Ah, you were young! Naruto-chan also didn't do as well as we'd hoped but look where he is now! Look where you are now."_

_"Well, he did have a chakra monster locked inside of him, making his chakra control absolutely horrible. And his rivalry with… him didn't make matters any better."_

_"Naruto-chan was hell-bent on being normal. He skipped our Kurama-talking sessions in favor of going out and playing, so maybe you're giving him too much credit. Either way, the Academy is good for basics, but the real test is coming back from missions alive, so you and Suguru-kun are tied in that area."_

_A ring on the doorbell interrupted whatever Sakura wanted to reply. At hearing Kushina's annoyed sigh, Sakura said, "Don't worry, Kushina-san, I got it." She walked through the small hallway, trying to pinpoint the identity of the person's chakra. It was very familiar, but she couldn't quite tell who it belonged to._

_She opened the door and stiffened immediately when she gazed into obsidian eyes. Her body switched to fight-mode and she had to force herself to calm down. Sakura gulped and wordlessly stepped aside to let the man in._

_They walked back into the kitchen in silence, and even Kushina tensed when she saw her guest, but she had much easier time disguising her initial reaction and not acting upon it. "Itachi-kun! It's good to see you! What brings you here?"_

_"Tsunade-sama asked me to deliver this to you." He reached for one of the pockets in his jounin jacket and got out a letter._

_Kushina grinned brightly and took it from him. "Naruto-chan is a bit absentminded and forgets to write his mother every once in a while. Thank you for bringing this to me, Itachi-kun. Tell me, how is the search for Sasuke-kun going?"_

_Sakura became rigid at the mention of her ex-teammate, but Itachi didn't seem to be affected by his brother's name. "Nothing, still. Orochimaru hid well, even from me."_

_"Either way, he'll come to you."_

_"Yes, but I rather not have him come to me with the urge to kill me," he replied with a wistful smile._

* * *

><p>Sakura woke up with a tight feeling on her chest. It was invigorating and filled her with power, but it was also very weird. It was Sunday, their day off, so Petra was still asleep on her bed across from hers. Very quietly she got up and went to the wardrobe she shared with her and chose some civilian clothes to put on for her outing.<p>

Spring had come and passed along with their first expedition together as a team, in which they had done admirably well and with zero injuries. The 39th Expedition would be that Thursday (the expedition where Levi would supposedly choose his second-in-command), but Sakura had asked to be able to leave that Sunday a month ago, so her request had been upheld.

She had to hold in her gasp when she saw the strange purple rhombus resting slightly above her left breast. It wasn't huge, but it wasn't small, either. She could feel it slightly pulsing, as if it were alive, mostly because of the chakra concentrated in that area.

It didn't appear malign, and as much as the rhombus intrigued her, she couldn't remember anything about it. She was more than positive that the answer was locked away inside her forgotten memories, but her amnesia wouldn't let her remember. She had already resigned herself to never getting back her recollections, but the appearance of this rhombus made her feel irritated that she couldn't remember something so important.

She finished buttoning her yellow shirt and slid on her long white skirt that almost completely covered her black boots. Today was the first day of the month break for the cadets of the 104th Trainee Squad, who would now graduate next year. Though usually the trainees went back to their homes, neither of her three wards had a home to return to. That's why she had used a good portion of her saved money to rent them a small house in the outskirts of Trost for their break. Last year she had wanted to do this, but she had been penniless and busy with the sensor business, but now that she had more than enough, she could take the hit.

Besides, who else was she going to spend money on?

Petra moaned in her sleep and murmured, "Sakura? Is that you?"

"Yeah, I'm going out. I'll be back tonight," she whispered.

"Okay. Have fun," she muttered before going back to sleep.

Sakura passed by the stables on her way to Trost and looked longingly at the horses that might shorten her ride. Still, Haruto belonged to the Survey Corps, and he couldn't be used for personal outings such as this one. She definitely understood why, but she still wished she had an easier way to commute to Trost.

The half hour walk was impossibly long with the prospect of seeing Mikasa, Eren, and Armin firmly lodged in her head. She hadn't seen them in almost two years, and though they exchanged letters weekly, she still missed them terribly. They were the reason she had kept herself alive for so long, after all.

A little wooden house by the windmill in the east side of Trost. That's the description she had gotten when she rented the house. It used to be owned by a family of three, but they had abruptly moved mid-spring and hadn't had enough time to sell it. Sakura, being the benevolent sweetheart that she was, offered to rent the house from them at a dirt cheap price meanwhile they sold it. If she hadn't haggled the price to a criminally low level, she would've never been able to afford it for a whole month, after all.

Luckily, the Survey Corps was located east of Trost, so she didn't have to cross the whole district to get to the house. She saw the windmill in the distance and, after making sure the road was clear of humans for at least the next three kilometers, she sped away with her kunoichi speed.

She could feel three chakra signatures inside the household and her excitement grew tenfold. She knocked twice and started tapping her foot as her sensitive ears heard the approaching footsteps. When the door opened and revealed a disheveled blond head, Sakura threw her arms around the shorter boy and squealed. "Armin! Look at you!"

Armin chuckled and hugged her back tightly, which made her inwardly happy to know that he was as comfortable around her, considering they didn't have as much history. They exchanged letters as much as she did for Eren and Mikasa, which definitely helped their relationship progress.

"You certainly outdid yourself with his house."

Sakura released him and observed him, noting the healthy glow of his skin and how much muscular he had become compared to the boy she had seen two years ago. "I'm glad you think so. I thought you guys might enjoy this."

"Armin!" Eren hollered from somewhere inside. "Is Sakura here?"

"Yeah!" he yelled back and flashed her a grin. "Come on in."

The house was made out of wood and had a small dinner table at the left, a kitchen further back, and a hallway in the right that led to the two bedrooms. Eren appeared out of the hallway and crushed her in a bear hug. "You've got to tell me everything about the Survey Corps!"

"Oh, I missed you too, Eren," she grumbled good-naturedly, "but I sure will. Look at how tall you've gotten! You're taller than me!"

"To be honest, you're not much of a challenge in the height department," he replied after he released her from his embrace. "Ow!" he complained when she punched him in the arm. "What was that for?"

"Respect your elders."

"You're not exactly my elder."

"Where's Mikasa?"

"Out gathering wood."

"You leave Mikasa to do all the housework?"

"Eren and I cook and Mikasa gets the fire for us to cook," Armin replied. "She's not very good at cooking."

That was certainly true; no matter how much Mikoto tried when she was younger, Mikasa was never able to make the more complicated dishes. "Oh, I forgot about that. Well, what are you two thinking about cooking?"

"We're tired of Training Corps food, but we only have enough to make a stew."

Mikasa opened the door and stopped momentarily before putting the firewood away and hugging Sakura, though a bit more distantly than she was accustomed to. She was beautiful and taller than Eren, but Sakura still saw her as the little girl to whom she bought a dollhouse for. "I missed you," she murmured.

The kunoichi smiled and soothingly rubbed her back. "It's been a long time, hasn't it?" She released her and stared at her three wards meaningfully. "In a year we'll all be together."

They all looked excited by the prospect, but there was something dark behind Eren's eagerness, something not entirely benign, and Sakura analyzed it as his bloodlust.

If he continued on this road, he may become a monster.

"Hmm, I have a busy day planned for us today. No stew shit; we're eating real food. Let's go to the market and cook a good meal."

"Can we practice your fighting style afterwards?" Eren asked in a hopeful voice. "They're teaching us in a completely different way than what you know."

"That's because taijutsu is from my homeland. Besides us four, I don't think anyone knows about it. But sure, after we've relaxed, we'll go out to the forest."

Days she spent with her three wards always ranked as the best days of the year. She asked more about their friends, because they never had enough time or space to write a letter fully detailing their lives. She learned more about Sasha Braus, their hungry and ingenious friend; Connie Springer, short but very agile; Krista Lenz, the dubbed goddess of the group; Reiner Braun, the older brother; Bertolt Hoover, the shy giant; Annie Leonhart, the combat expert; Jean Kirstein, a charismatic boy bent on joining the Military Police (much to Eren's annoyance); Marco Bott, a kind boy who got along with almost everybody. The 104th Class came alive before her all thanks to their stories and she couldn't help but look forward to meeting them, though that was unlikely considering no one joined the Survey Corps unless he was an idealistic fool or the Garrison couldn't accept more recruits.

In return, Sakura told them all about her life as a member of the Special Operations Squad and her role as sensor for the Corps. She found one more thing about Eren, that being his complete adoration of Captain Levi and Commander Erwin. Levi was cool and extremely strong, meanwhile Erwin was charismatic and a near genius. She thought that a small reality check would help lower Levi's high standing ("Captain Levi is an irritable, violent, unapproachable man who happens to be shorter than me… Alright, one centimeter shorter but still"), yet she only managed to make him "more human" in his eyes; he couldn't wait to work with him.

Armin idolized Commander Erwin ––though not nearly to the same degree as Eren–– meanwhile Mikasa was more apathetic about the Survey Corps. Indeed, just as how Grisha had told her years ago, Mikasa would follow wherever Eren went, and there was nothing that could stop her, not even her own unhappiness.

"How are expeditions? Do you kill many titans?"

"We do, but we don't celebrate."

"Why not?"

"There is more to mourn about than to celebrate after expeditions," Sakura replied quite somberly, making Eren's excited demeanor change drastically. "Even if you survived, you still have nothing to be happy about."

The blond looked up at the canopy of the trees, a thoughtful expression on his sweaty face. He was the one most tired after their training session, but Sakura had to keep herself from beaming in pride at how far Armin had gotten. Eren had taken Annie's fighting techniques to heart and even showed her one or two, and Mikasa remembered the earlier forms she had practiced back in the Ackerman household.

"This is the life that waits us, right?" Armin asked quietly.

"It's not too late to change your mind," she returned.

"No, it's too late. It's four years too late," Eren answered, his words burning with hatred and passion. Had Sakura not been accustomed to his emotions, she would've flinched. "They need to pay for what they've done, and I won't stop until I've exterminated every last one of them."

"Love is better motivation than hate and revenge," she quoted, finally understanding the meaning behind Helsa's dying words. She must've been angry at life for taking away her husband and son, just like how Eren was angry, and the years had passed and she still didn't move on.

"Hate keeps me alive," Eren answered and got up from his spot against the tree trunk to better look at Sakura, who was perched on a tree branch. "Hate will change the world."

Sakura looked down on Mikasa for help to dissuade Eren's violent feelings about titans, but she was leaning against the tree, lost in her own thoughts. People must think that Mikasa neither hated nor loved, but with that expression she knew that the girl was just as damaged as any of them four and had very deep feelings about things.

Misfits usually changed things, and with four misfits in the group, who knew what exactly would come out of them?

* * *

><p><strong>I don't know if it was clear or not, but the SnK world uses MMA style fighting meanwhile Sakura uses the taijutsu she has honed over her ninja years. The only reason why she lost was because Levi had intel on her and forced her to play by his rules. Otherwise she would've won, even without her chakra.<strong>

**Is it just me or has anyone noticed how fucking scary Eren is, both in canon and in this story? I still remember what he told Reiner and Bert and Ymir when they were outside Wall Maria... Sheesh. That type of Eren is the inspiration for this story.**

**Earlier in the story I made a mistake about everyone's heights and for that I sincerely apologize, but these are the official stats (sans the 104th Corps since they're still growing boys and girls), mostly from the wikis, that I will be using from now on:**

**Sakura: 161 cm, 56 kg (this is the only thing that is different from the wikia, since she cannot be 45 kg in the SnK world), biologically 24 years old, on paper 23.**

**Levi: 160 cm , 65 kg, ? years old (28)**

**Petra: 158 cm, 55 kg, 20 years old**

**Oluo: 173 cm, 61 kg, 21 years old**

**Eld: 182 cm, 75 kg, ? years old (24)**

**Gunther: 183 cm, 82 kg, ? years old (24)**

**Hange: 170 cm, 60 kg, ? years old (26)**

**Erwin: 188 cm, 92 kg, ? years old (30)**

**The ages in question marks are those that haven't been confirmed and haven't been assigned. The parenthesis are the ages I personally assign them when I write, but to each their own and quite frankly I don't mind as long as they aren't 70 or something.**

**Yet again, apologies for the confusion, and if you see something that doesn't make sense or doesn't go with what I've written before, please do tell me. I accidentally change somethings, even if I don't mean it.**

**As always, my sincerest thanks to Sincerely Athena, anima, Basia Orci, FairiesDescent, Atsirk Enoh, mun3litKnight, cj1of4, naremon, AmeRaSora, Sakura19Haruno95 , catxangel, cherryblossom1423, Sithmor, Guest, Ikillatfirstsight, Boingy, alien7676, Love Remedy, MiniRoonie, brokenmaelstrom , No Name, Sky65 , Lady Light, Darling, and Mayflowerz 411 for being so awesome and leaving reviews. Your words are always such a delight to read. Also, many thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites! It makes me happy knowing that The Vessel entertains you.**

**Reviews are sugar,**

**Penpal**


	11. Petrichor

Haruto always enjoyed galloping through the forests, which was interesting because when Sakura first met her horse, he seemed to prefer open fields. There was something strangely mystifying about the large trees that sometimes were fifty meters tall, something even animals themselves fascinated over.

Out of all the duties the Squad Levi was involved in, creating a supply line was her favorite because they usually traversed through the forests, where Sakura felt most comfortable in. Commander Erwin preferred to ride in the open field at the start of the expedition for better visibility and greater map-making, but the majority Survey Corps usually traversed through as many forests on the way back to hide themselves, with the scouts remaining outside.

Their mission was to pave the way for the rest of the teams going through the forests. So far they hadn't come across a titan, which was supposed to be a relief, but she knew both Petra and Oluo were waiting for the moment to show off in front of Levi since this was their first mission. Squad Levi had been off the roster for the 38th Expedition to train the new team, and it was time for them to show their chemistry.

Though Sakura wished to have been paired up with Petra, she couldn't deny that her style suited Oluo's the best. She was a support teammate meanwhile Oluo liked killing solo, but Petra created the best openings for him to take. On the other hand, whenever Oluo wanted to give her a titan, he would incapacitate the titan in the best way Petra killed. Sakura, on the other hand, was incompatible with Petra in the sharing area, because Sakura preferred quick kills over safe kills, throwing Petra off.

The three of them were nigh invincible together.

Gunther and Eld were best together since neither took a dominant role and shared the tasks almost equally. That had been one of the problems Sakura had with Eld when they had been paired together, because she threw Eld off too much to his liking and sometimes got in his way. The two men, on the other hand, had even graduated in the same year and worked together for months afterward, solidifying their relationship and chemistry.

That left Levi, the loner of the team. She still hadn't worked with him yet because most of the titans had been handled mostly by Gunther and Eld, with the occasional Petra and Oluo kill. Sakura was a interested as to what brought this abeyance of kills from her Captain, who usually took on titans alone. She wasn't worried about him, but she didn't want to be taken by surprise when the time came to attack.

Maybe thinking about titans was a bad idea, because like a jinx she felt some three kilometers north, in the middle of their destination. If she had been in Erwin's team, they would've avoided them, but since she was in Levi, it was their job to engage with them so that another less fortunate team wouldn't.

"Four titans, three kilometers north. Half a kilometer apart. No aberrants," she shouted over the gallops of their horses.

The black-haired man ahead of her nodded and nudged Makimi to ride faster, and the rest of the team followed his change. This was the biggest group they'd come across the whole expedition and would serve as the test to see just how well they interacted with each other.

If she wasn't aware of their mindlessness, Sakura would say the titans were hidden in the trees. As soon as they located two, Levi went after the biggest one, a fat thirteen-meter, leaving Sakura dumbfounded as to whether let him handle it alone or provide support, which was her weak area. Instead of going after the same titan her captain went for, she sent her hook to the nape of the nine-meter a bit further away and aimed for a quick kill.

In the middle of her trajectory she felt three more titans, all aberrants, coming towards them at full speed and would attack them in less than three minutes. She grit her teeth and hurried to the nape, but before she could slash the titan shook its body violently, throwing her off course.

She let go of the hook and was sent flying, but she quickly recovered midair with the help of her reflexes and sent her hook to a tree trunk so that she could stand vertically on it. "Three more incoming! Aberrants!" she shouted.

Levi landed in the branch on top of hers and replied, "Let those four take care of remaining two. We'll go for those three. Follow me."

Sakura voiced her assent and was about to follow Levi when she saw Petra having trouble with the same titan who had shook her. Unlike her, Petra was no kunoichi who could recover in midair with the same finesse Sakura could. It was one of her weak spots, an area she had never managed to improve, an area that might kill her right now.

She didn't know why Petra had taken on that titan alone without Oluo's help, but now she had landed herself in trouble and it was up to her to get her, since Oluo was nowhere to be seen and wouldn't get to Petra on time. She didn't even hesitate and immediately lent Petra support by distracting the titan and getting all of its attention on her by body-flickering towards it. Unfortunately, she miscalculated the distance between its rather long arms and the tree she sent her 3DMG hook to and it snatched her mid-flight, knocking the air out of her.

Her mission had been accomplished, because the titan stopped moving and focused completely on its pink-haired prey. "Petra! Now!"

The auburn woman righted herself immediately and sped towards the titan, slashing it twice to kill it. The titan's hold slackened and Sakura quickly got out of its grip before it fell on top of her.

She aimed her 3DMG to one of the lower branches and leaned her head on the trunk once she landed, her breathing erratic from the adrenaline rush. Petra settled next to her and whacked her upside the head. "Are you stupid?You could've been killed!"

Sakura laughed breathlessly. So she hadn't seen her body-flicker? That was strange. She hadn't tried to hide her burst, but maybe Petra was focused on her titan and nothing else, considering she thought she was taken it alone. Then again, she should really work on her reflexes and observational skills. "I know, but so could've you. I wasn't going to let Captain–– Oh shit!" She snapped to full attention and sent her 3DMG in the direction the aberrants were, not bothering to explain the situation to anyone.

In her panic to keep Petra alive she had completely forgotten about her captain's orders and had left him to handle three aberrants all by himself. If he died because of her… If humanity lost its strongest soldier because she wasn't fast enough, she wouldn't be able to handle the guilt.

She couldn't sense the titans anymore, but three sources of steam rising from the ground gave her a good idea as to where the Captain would be. He was perched in one of the higher branches, cleaning his sword much to her amusement.

The kunoichi landed quietly next to him and observed the three disintegrating remains with impressed eyes. He had taken three aberrants all by himself and he didn't have a single hair out of place. It was hard for her to take on three titans by herself, let alone three aberrants, but he had done it in less than two minutes. She wasn't surprised, but she was amazed.

"What part of 'Follow me' did you not understand, Ackerman?"

Sakura inwardly flinched at his cold voice and the usage of her last name. In a way it was better than being called _cadet_, but it did make her flash back to her time in the Training Squad, where they called everyone by their last name to create an emotional barrier.

"Petra needed my help," she replied, her voice confident. Yes, she hadn't followed his orders, but she hadn't ignored them just to spite him; she saved one of her teammates and her precious friend. "The titan that threw me off was going to––"

"What part of 'Follow me' did you not understand, _Ackerman_?"

The kunoichi stiffened at the more menacing tone, but her eyes narrowed in growing annoyance. So he wasn't going to listen to her legitimate explanation just so that he could act all high and mighty? She respected his fighting skills, yes, but he was a prick and needed to reminded that she wasn't going to tolerate his attitude. "I understood every word, _Captain._"

He finally turned towards her and stared at her with chilly gray eyes. Even though she was (barely) taller than him, some stupid part of her felt small in being at the receiving end of his glare. "Then why didn't you do that?"

"As I said before––"

"Did your legs break? Did you run out of gas? Did you have to save a teammate? What other excuse do you want to say?"

"I was saving my _friend. _Not all of us take the deaths of their teammates as admirably as you do_… _Captain." Almost as soon as the words tumbled out of her mouth some tiny part of her wished to take them back, but it was too late. She had stepped over a line and it felt _good _to finally let out her frustration.

He grabbed her by the collar of her white shirt and hoisted her in the air, much to her surprise; here she weighed close to sixty kilograms and he was picking her up as if she were a twig! His glare intensified and he growled, "We have a problem, and we're going to solve it right now, Ackerman. I can't kick you off my team and you can't leave my team for the same reason."

"Then we can't solve our problem," she replied calmly, despite the fact that she was slightly choking.

"No, but we can come damn close." He let her go and she landed rather gently, though her harsh breaths betrayed just how much he had affected her body's oxygen supply. "Once you submit to me, we won't have any problems."

"I'm not a dog."

"You're right; a dog is smarter and follows orders."

She growled and resisted the urge to kill him right there. Eren would be so disappointed if she told him that she killed his idol in a fit of rage. "I'm not a mindless person. I can be trusted to make my own decisions. I'm not going to blindly follow orders but I won't make any stupid mistakes."

"So you want recognition that you're a human being?"

"No, I want power to act however I want."

The man's eyes narrowed further in thought. Sakura knew she was asking for a lot, but she wasn't used to taking any less. She was one of the most powerful human beings in the planet, goddammit, and if she wasn't going to receive power then might as well take it.

"I can't let you act independently." His voice had finally calmed down and acquired its usual detached manner, signaling that his anger had mostly passed. "I can, though, make you my second-in-command."

Her eyes widened at his decision. She was sure that he would've immediately discarded her from any position due to her rebelliousness, but here he was offering her a spot of leadership? Well, wasn't that what she wanted to begin with? "So I would be your second-in-command and killing partner?"

He nodded. "In exchange, you will submit to _me _when we're back inside the walls."

Aha, there was the catch; she had been waiting for that. "And what do you mean by _submit_?"

"Do whatever I ask you to do whenever I ask you to do it without complaints or disobedience. You want me to treat you like an equal? Fine. But at the same time you have to learn your place."

Though his way of thinking seemed paradoxical to her at first glance, her more rational mind understood more than her prideful side. He knew that she wouldn't give in unless he gave her something in return, but he also needed to establish a position of dominance. What was surprising was that the Captain was willing to think rationally about this and not be hung up on power. Perhaps she had misjudged him, but now was not the time to go back on her words. "Fine, I can agree with that."

"It wasn't a suggestion."

"Well, good thing I liked it or otherwise it would've been a suggestion."

"Don't ruin the peace, Ackerman."

* * *

><p>Mikasa aimed an uppercut, but Sakura was faster than her and quickly sidestepped, mindful of the tree branch on the floor. She took advantage of her momentum and rushed at her, landing a chop in the back of he neck, incapacitating her immediately. Mikasa crumpled like a puppet cut from its strings and she groaned quietly, still not used to the power behind Sakura's strikes. "It doesn't matter how much I train, I can never seem to beat you."<p>

Sakura chuckled and sat down on the ground beside her, extending her hands over her body to use her healing chakra. "I have much more experience than you. It's supposed to be that way." Mikasa relaxed immediately, her tired muscles soothed. "But I can see you've trained. Your much more muscular now."

The black-haired girl stared pointedly at the kunoichi's glowing hands, a faint hint of fascination behind her eyes. "It's so amazing how you can do that… Have you remembered anything more?"

Sakura frowned and shook her head. She hadn't gotten her memories nor her jutsu back, and though it didn't bother her as much as it used to when she was with Helsa, she was aware that she was incomplete without them. "No, I haven't. I've tried meditation and all that, but nothing comes to mind."

"What about dreams?"

"I can't remember my dreams. As far as I know, I don't dream."

Mikasa put a hand on top of Sakura's, indicating that she was done, and sat up, facing her. "Everyone dreams," she said quietly. "You just can't remember them. Don't worry, it happens to everyone. I'm sure you'll regain your memories one day…"

"What's with the sad tone?"

She blinked, as if surprised that Sakura had detected it. Mikasa _was_ very good at hiding her emotions and being detached, but Sakura had known her since she was a kid and thus currently knew her better than anyone in the planet. "What are you talking about? I wasn't–– Fine, you're right, stop giving me that look."

Sakura smirked triumphantly and nodded. "Good girl. Now tell me what is making you sad."

"I… I once asked Mom what would happen if you got your memories back, and she told us that you would leave us and go back with your real family, because that was the _right _thing to do, the smart choice. And then knowing that you're actively trying to regain your memories… I just don't want you to leave me…"

Sakura bit her lip and resisted the urge to embrace her younger sibling as well as whack her in the back of the head. It was a valid point, because she was sure people were missing her, but at the moment she couldn't really care about these people because she didn't remember ever loving them. "Mikasa, I promise I will never leave you." She understood just how hard it must've been for Mikasa to admit her feelings, so she wouldn't ruin the moment by being obtuse.

Her lip curled and she looked at the side disdainfully. "Don't say that."

"I'll never leave you or Eren or Armin behind."

She glared at Sakura. "You're just filling me with false hope."

"And you're taking my promises for granted. When have I ever broken a promise to you, hmm?"

Mikasa was quiet, no doubt looking back to all the promises Sakura had made to her and Eren and Armin. She visibly deflated and shook her head slowly. "You haven't."

"Exactly, so trust me when I say I'll never leave you. Besides, the chances of me finding my real family are close to none. Nobody inside the walls can use chakra."

"What about outside?"

"I don't think so… We would've seen them by now, since part of a shinobi's job is to gather intel."

"It's those comments that also make me uncomfortable. How can you remember what the shinobi do if you don't remember ever being a shinobi?"

"… I guess the same way as I sometimes remember jutsu. It just comes randomly."

"I don't think it's random, Sakura. Say, what was going on when you remembered your jutsu?"

She thought back to those instances when the hand signs came to her as naturally as breathing did. They were vivid in her memory, because the events themselves were important to her in her life. There was the night of Helsa's death, where she remembered a water jutsu to put down a fire that could've destroyed a forest and had subsequently drained her of her reserves. Then she had remembered that vacuum jutsu during her second year final exams and a couple of months later a legitimate wind jutsu when she didn't want to kill those bandits. And finally, the most recent one was when she had remembered the chakra scalpel because she didn't have her swords with her and she had to take down a titan.

They all had a thing in common, and it was a sense of danger or stress.

"Danger or stress usually does it," she explained slowly. "But it doesn't make sense. I've been in danger countless times on expeditions but I haven't unlocked more jutsu."

"You've mentioned various times that you don't want to reveal your powers because you have no idea what the government or military will do to you. Wouldn't it be dangerous to use jutsu in front of everyone if you believe that is true?"

"What do you mean?"

"If you think about it, there's physical danger but you also have the social danger. From what I can also remember from what you've told us, you were both alone _and _in danger."

"I wasn't alone with the bandits."

"But they couldn't see you, so your identity was safe."

Sakura hummed, finally piecing what Mikasa was saying together. What she was saying was true, and she had been both alone _and _in danger when she unlocked more jutsu. She hadn't exactly been in danger with the second year exam, but she had been in danger "of not being first." Same with the thieves, because she could've easily killed them, but she was in danger "of making herself a murderer." However, she had never felt that sensation of getting a jutsu back whenever people around her were threatened, so the danger of "being emotionally hurt by someone's death" didn't apply to the formula.

Still, it seemed her social situations had an impact on how she unlocked her jutsu, but why?

At any rate, the best way to guarantee that she would gain back her jutsu was to be alone and in danger, because social situations had many variables. "That's true. Maybe I could use this information to unlock more jutsu."

Mikasa didn't look amused. "I hope you're not saying that you'll put yourself in danger to get more powerful."

"Of course not." Sakura looked up at the canopy of the trees, finding contentment with being surrounded by them. The Survey Corps had forests, yes, but she associated those forests with work and training, but here with Mikasa she felt at home, as if she was still with the Ackermans. "I wouldn't place myself in danger when I have promises to keep."

The younger girl smiled, a true one filled with contentment, at her words. She knew that they all feared abandonment more than the usual, and the only way to combat that was by staying together. "We should go back. Eren will be upset that we left him with kitchen duty meanwhile we trained."

"Ah, if he's upset, maybe I will have an excuse to beat him up."

"… Don't be too rough, okay?"

Sakura laughed and stood up, extending a hand towards Mikasa for her to help herself up. "We'll see."

* * *

><p>She stared at the Captain in confusion, not exactly following his orders. "You want me to what?"<p>

"Oh, deaf now? I said, 'Bring me my tea.'"

"I heard that. I just don't understand why you're asking _me _to do it. Don't you have someone else who usually does that?"

"That someone is you now."

Sakura clenched her fists and breathed in deeply. "I thought you said I had no duties once I joined your squad."

"And I thought I said that you would submit to me."

The kunoichi bristled and slightly bared her teeth. She thought that "follow orders" meant doing as he asked immediately during practice, but this was just plain degrading. She didn't bust her ass day and night just so that she could make him his tea. "That's not submitting. That's me being a servant."

Levi finally looked up from his work and glared at her in annoyance. At least he hadn't asked her to do his paperwork for her, but knowing her luck he will soon enough. "Ackerman, I'm not in the mood for your shit. I want black tea with lemon. And I would advice you to do it soon, for your own good," he commanded with an air of finality and went back to his work.

Sakura could almost _feel _the sizzle coming from her head but even she understood when a fight was over. She stalked outside and fumed towards the kitchens. Why did he have to be such an asshole? Would it really hurt him to show kindness every once in a while, or, even rarer, respect? She was so caught up in her inner rant that she almost missed Oluo.

"Oh, wow, Pinky. What did the Captain do?"

The kunoichi halted and gave Oluo one of her nastiest glares. "What makes you think it was the Captain?"

"You're always like that whenever Captain makes you do something you don't want to do. What is it this time?"

Sakura glowered, but it wasn't aimed at her friend. "He's making me do his tea."

"And what's so bad about that?"

"It's degrading! Only the unranked soldiers do these types of things. He's forcing me to 'submit myself' to him."

Oluo raised an eyebrow, not impressed at her explanation. "You do know that we all submit ourselves to higher ranked soldiers, right?"

"I know," she growled. "It just pisses me off to submit myself to him."

He shook his head, amazed at the sheer thickheadedness and stupidity his friend was showing. She had had no qualms in being respectful towards Squad Leader Hange and Commander Erwin, so what was the problem with doing the same with Captain Levi? "Anyway, do you know how to make tea?"

"No."

"Want me to help you?"

"Yes."

The kitchens were mostly empty except for the odd pair of soldiers that always forgot lunch had been three hours ago and were scavenging for leftovers. Usually there were none ––she knew from experience–– but she still internally wished them good luck.

Oluo went to fill the kettle with water meanwhile Sakura searched for the black tea leaves, and a lemon. He then gathered the necessary amount of wood and placed the kettle on the stovetop after she lit the fire. After that he said they needed to wait around six minutes to put the leaves in and then wait for three minutes so that the water acquires taste.

She took advantage of the solitude and the comfortable companionship to ask what had been gnawing her nosy mind.

"So how is your conquest with Petra going?"

"There is no conquest," he grumbled.

"You don't love her anymore?" she asked coyly. She already knew the answer, but she was positive that Oluo would divulge more information by trying to disprove her than answering her questions.

His eyes narrowed and he still refused to meet her gaze, opting to stare at the rapidly boiling water. "Of course I still love her, stupid. I'm just focused on other things right now."

"Which are?"

"Getting better at killing titans."

"I don't see how that impedes you from pursuing Petra."

Oluo's resolve finally broke down and he looked at her in pure annoyance. "Did you erase our conversation about this last time? I told you, I don't want to fall even more just to see her die."

Something inside of her quivered. "I won't let her die," she said with a resoluteness Oluo probably found weird, because for some reason she made it seem more like a fact than a promise. "So you should do as you wish."

"You can't say that and expect me to believe you."

"Have a little faith in me, will you?"

He added the leaves and closed the kettle again. "You're better than me, I admit it, but if Captain Levi can't keep his teams alive, why can you?"

She grunted softly, caught off guard. She couldn't just come out and say she was a ninja, right? Well, she could, because she trusted Oluo with her life and nobody was around, but _should_ she? What exactly could she gain from divulging such information, and what could she lose? For once, she could lose his respect or gain it, depending on how understanding he was of her predicament in keeping his friends alive and being available to her proteges. He could stay true to their friendship by keeping this a secret or stay true to humanity by informing Commander Erwin just like how Carlo and Moblit had done when they witnessed her sensor ability.

All of those reactions were equally likely, so with a heavy heart she decided to keep her mouth shut and not say anything. She couldn't forsake the relationship she had with her wards just to see her best friends have a relationship that might not even happen. At any rate, they would get their happy ending because she wouldn't let either of them die. So what if they started a relationship later than usual? It would come to fruition anyway. She was just being desperate for them, trying to force something to happen because she knew it would make them both very happy.

But maybe she should just let them run their own course.

"Is the tea ready?" she said after minutes of silence.

"Yeah, yeah," Oluo replied in his usual tone, letting her know that everything was well and forgotten.

Five minutes later Sakura was walking slowly with a very hot teacup, careful to not spill the liquid on her hands. Bless the soul of the people that had done this numerous times in their lives, but bless her even more because apparently she was going do to it everyday. Trust Levi to turn one of the best soldiers in the Survey Corps into his personal tea brewer.

She knocked on the door and waited for his monotone voice to let her in. He didn't even look up from his work when she went in and she wondered just what did the Captain do that five hours of his everyday life went strictly to paperwork. Then again, Sakura wasn't well-acquainted with the inner workings of the military and politics so maybe there was a very good reason why he stayed cooped inside his office for most of the day.

He carefully took the cup from her hands and immediately took a sip. He gave a faint hum of contentment, which made Sakura feel oddly proud that her (and Oluo's) work had pleased him. "Thank you. You're dismissed."

She saluted and left the room with a small smile, admitting to herself that perhaps making tea for her captain wasn't such a horrible experience as she had previously made it out to be.

Not that she would ever tell anyone, of course.

* * *

><p>The last time she had met with Sebastian they had agreed to go somewhere else for a change, since they almost always met exclusively in the Leaping Horse, and the scene was becoming a little too boring.<p>

"How about we go to Walden a little north from here next Saturday we meet? I hear if we're lucky we might hear some wolves," he had said with a vague hint of excitement.

She had raised a pink eyebrow, not at all convinced. "And why is that something we should be looking for?"

"Being in the wildlife is fun, and I think we should do something fun."

"For a traveling musician, you sure are keen to getting yourself in danger." He had grinned in self satisfaction, and not even Sakura was able to resist his charm. "At any rate, I need to ask my captain for permission to get Saturday off."

"Ah yeah, true, you have to ask Captain Levi, correct?"

That had been the time Sakura had been waiting for, to finally tell him that she was in the military, but was surprised to see that he had beaten her and already knew. "How do you know?"

"I have my ways. Besides, I'm here on a mission, and you're a part of it."

Then she had felt wary, and rightly so. She didn't want to be anyone's _mission_, and Sebastian's profile wasn't really helping matters. "It doesn't make me feel safe knowing that."

He had felt the accusation and suspicion behind her voice, because his countenance became utterly serious and strangely honest. "In the beginning, I may have thought of you as just part of my mission, but now I truly want to spend time with you, Sakura."

"Am I still a part of your mission?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to tell me what it is?"

"I can't."

The atmosphere in the Leaping Horse was still jovial and very rowdy, but in their little secluded corner, Sakura had felt the coldness descending on their conversation. She hadn't liked it and she was even more suspicious, but at the same time she had to find out. "Why can't you?"

His eyebrows had drawn in and he had looked away from her, and Sakura had been very tempted to just stand up and walk away, but curiosity was firmly rooting her in her place. "It would ruin the mission. Just know that _you're _not the mission and I honestly want to spend time with _you_."

"But I'm still a part of the mission."

"Yes."

Though she was even warier of Sebastian, she had to give it to him for coming clean so early in their relationship. He would make a horrible ninja, she thought sardonically. Even though any hope of a normal friendship had been ruined, she still wanted to stick around and find why he had sought her out in the first place, and while he had confessed his interests to her, she would be the better deceiver and manipulate him into telling her just what he is doing.

"I'll only stay because I appreciate your company and we still have to finish translating the song," she had said in a tight voice, making it seem as if she was really against the decision but only had done it for him. This would make the victim even more willing to divulge information in the future. "But don't think for a second that I'll stay around if you treat me like a mission."

His light blue eyes widened and narrowed immediately. "I would never."

And that is how she found herself in the outskirts of Walden supporting a very attractive, unconscious man in the middle of the night. She was tempted to leave him in the forest, not because he was possibly a spy, but because he had gotten them into this situation in the first place.

"'Oh, let's look for wolves,' he said," she mocked in his tenor. "'It'll be fun,' he said. Well, little shit faints when we first hear one. And leaves me hauling his ass around."

Sebastian moaned softly from besides her, as if he could understand her.

"I can't believe I thought you were threatening. You owe me big time once we're back in Walden."

At any rate, they were lost inside the woods. As much as she was embarrassed to admit it, she had gotten distracted by their conversation of ancient myths about Warrior Maria that she hadn't really paid attention to where they were going and where the town was located. She could leave him in the ground and scout ahead, maybe even climb the tallest tree and try to find the direction Walden was, but she had a gnawing feeling that Sebastian wasn't fully unconscious and he would remember this moment tomorrow.

So all she could do was hope she was going in the right direction or sense other human chakra signatures that might guide her back.

A pack of wolves howled, and she could sense they were nearby. Fighting humans was one thing, but fighting animals was another. She had experience fighting people, but she had never punched an animal. In fact, even though she was sure she could kill most of them, she didn't feel comfortable with killing, be it animals or humans. She had avoided hunting in the Training Corps and always made an excuse whenever Erick wanted to hunt for the family. Animals never did anything malicious to humanity so why should she?

She sighed and held Sebastian tighter by his waist, just in case, because she wouldn't let any of them become food that night.

Sakura focused most of her chakra to her hearing and less to her eyesight from then on. She could only enhance one of the senses at the time, because doing otherwise would cause sensory overload and would be bad for her brain. At the moment it robbed her of much needed eyesight, especially because she needed to see, but the wolves were meant to be heard rather than seen.

She could hear them coming, and the stress buildup was almost unbearable, especially because Sebastian's body had completely slackened and now she was fully carrying him. Sakura was almost running now, though the movement was extremely awkward and sluggish compared to what she was normally capable of. If only she fully trusted Sebastian, she would have no qualms with showing her ninja side at the moment and then swearing him to secrecy, by force if necessary, but she didn't even expect him to keep her status hidden even with the threat of death.

Unfamiliar chakra started surrounding her and she sent off more than usual in warning, hoping that animals had some sixth sense that made them aware of chakra.

Her hopes were crushed when she felt them and heard them stalking closer, each second making her heartbeat faster and her skin even sweatier. Sebastian was blissfully unconscious next to her and perhaps even asleep, judging by how peaceful he looked.

She stiffened and stood very still when the first wolf came into view and felt her skin start to sweat more profusely as more wolves started surrounding her. She counted nine and quickly observed that four of them were bigger than the other five, probably older.

They all didn't make a move, waiting for the other party to react. Sakura didn't do anything for fear of putting Sebastian in danger, because she wasn't sure that she could fight nine wolves while simultaneously keeping Sebastian alive. She could gather him in her arms and leave him on a branch, but none of the branches close by looked as if they could support a sixty kilogram man.

The biggest wolf ––the alpha male, no doubt–– stalked closer, but the other wolves remained eerily still. Sakura coiled her muscles and drew Sebastian in, ready to bolt at the first sign of an attack. Could she outrun wolves? How fast were wolves to begin with? Either way, the best way to secure survival was by taking out the alpha male with a good punch and then making a run for it. She would just have to convince Sebastian that whatever he experienced was just a dream.

He sniffed as soon as he got closer and was immediately at the defensive when she shot a small burst of chakra. Even though she knew little of wolves, she understood that what she was experiencing was uncommon. None of the wolves looked eager in attacking her, and the alpha, though still alert, didn't seem aggressive at the moment.

Finally he turned his body around and started stalking off, but he abruptly stopped and looked at his side, his golden eyes staring at her as if he had a question. Sakura didn't think for a second about moving, but when two wolves brushed past her and joined the alpha in his waiting, her instincts kicked in and she started following them.

It was weird, walking in the middle of a wolf pack, and strangely exhilarating. She always knew she had a good connection with animals, but she had no idea it was _this _good. Wolves, revered predators in this area, were walking alongside her as if it were a normal occurrence, but she was almost positive that a nice, relaxing stroll with canids wasn't what Walden actively advertised.

She felt the chakra presences of various humans congregated together, indicating a human settlement. She didn't even care if it was Walden or not, because just being back in civilization and surviving the night was a success. Sakura was shocked to find the level of intelligence in wolves to be high enough to understand her predicament, as well as their problem solving skills to lead her back to safety.

The alpha male stopped, howled, and then ran off to the east, his wolf pack following close behind him. Now that their job was done, they could go back to their normal routine.

But not even her wonder could keep her from sensing the presence that suddenly appeared behind her.

"_Don't look back," _the deep voice said calmly in Japanese. She stiffened and coiled her muscles immediately, ready to drop Sebastian and engage with the mysterious man. "_It's good to see you, Sakura."_

She shivered at the familiar way he said her name. "_Who are you?"_

_"I'm a friend. I just wanted to drop by to see how you were doing."_

_"I'm smart enough to know that's a lie."_

The man chuckled, a sound paradoxically filled with both pride and contempt. "_Oh, in the beginning I had my qualms, but seeing how beautifully everything is going makes me very happy. You are an excellent Vessel."_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"Hmm, you don't need to know that; it might ruin the process. Well, it seems my time is up and I have to leave. Continue building strong relationships, will you? Immerse yourself in this world. And remember, I'm always able to watch you, Sakura."_

The man body-flickered away, leaving Sakura breathing harshly and very perturbed. She was glad Sebastian was asleep, because there was no way she would be able to explain this to him, because she wasn't sure herself. Though the man hadn't threatened her, she was very sure they hadn't shared a close bond, otherwise he would've attempted to convince Sakura to go back with him.

And then there was the matter of her role in his plans. He had called her a Vessel, right? A Vessel for what?

She sighed and shifted Sebastian a little bit more so that they could both be more comfortable. This was not the time to be thinking of such things, especially when she needed to get to safety and Sebastian needed a warm bed to rest in.

* * *

><p>Sakura didn't like the outlook of the 44th Expedition. The sky was gray, very gray, and the air felt more humid than usual. The storm was coming from the north, which meant that even if they tried to come back they wouldn't be able to avoid it, but at least they would've been close to home. However, they had already spent a whole day riding, so by now it was too late.<p>

The main issue with the weather was that it ruined their strategy for titan detection. The Commander hadn't found a way to make the flares visible with the rain and it usually led to more deaths because of the lack of communication. Apparently, there had been a huge accident in an expedition a couple of years ago because of the rain.

Before the Special Ops squad would've been in some real trouble, since they lost visibility and couldn't communicate with the Survey Corps, but since Sakura could sense titans, her team was just a bit more stressed out than usual. After all, fighting in the rain was much harder than normal fighting, since raindrops usually got in the way and slowed them down. And slippery surfaces caused accidents, but that was more uncommon.

"Still nothing?" Oluo sped up his horse, Felsen, and maintained Haruto's speed. His voice was uncaring, but Sakura knew him well enough to detect the hints of anxiousness in his face.

She understood; she was anxious as well. "No titans. Maybe there's no sun and they can't come out?"

"That's what the stories say, but we know that's not true. Besides, there's still some light, or we wouldn't be able to see."

Sakura nodded grimly and looked forward, eyeing the open field with growing wariness. "True. But still, I haven't felt anything. We should worry about finding the campsite instead. If we don't resupply, we'll be screwed."

"We haven't used gas yet."

"I meant food. I'm really hungry."

"Did someone say food?"

Even if she hadn't recognized the voice, she would've still guessed who it was. "Yes, Gunther, someone did mention food, but not because we're about to eat."

To her right, Gunther grinned sheepishly. He was the one who ate the most out of the group and got hungry the fastest. Considering his height and weight, it was normal that he ate the most, but he _enjoyed _food with such a passion that if it weren't for the Survey Corps's intense training, poor Gunther would be fat. "It just got me a bit excited. I'm starting to feel a bit weak."

That was true, now that Gunther mentioned it. They had ridden for so long and they still hadn't managed to reach a supply point where they could rest and eat, and it wasn't like they could just stop in the middle of an open field with no buildings to set camp. Besides, it would be almost impossible to coordinate without the Long-Range Scouting Formation working.

Just then, Sakura felt six titans, a bit evenly spaced from each other, and resisted the urge to groan out loud. Fighting titans in the rain was hard, fighting titans in the open field was hard too, but fighting titans in the rain _and _in the open field was extremely hard. At least there were no aberrants; that would just make things even harder.

She shouted out their locations and the team immediately readied. Levi decided that they would split up in pairs and each pair would kill two titans, which was what Sakura had predicted he would do. Oluo and Petra were given the eastern titans, Gunther and Eld the center ones, and Levi and her went for the western ones. They were each around half a kilometer apart, which meant that they wouldn't easily help each other, but they had spent seven months working together as a team and had gone out together for six expeditions; they could handle this.

The three pairs separated when Sakura felt the titans closing. Even with the downpour, it was easy to see where the titans were located, since they were quite tall and sometimes made moaning noises. Levi looked back to Sakura, who was riding a bit behind, gave her a hard look, and she nodded, understanding what he wanted to do.

It was a risky maneuver, but they had practiced it so much that it had lost the thrill of danger. Sakura sped up her horse so that they would pass right in front of the titan. Of course, the titan would try to reach down and grab her, but by then Levi was already behind the crouched titan and it was a simple kill; he even had enough time to get back on Makimi.

She kept riding on the direction of the last titan and also felt one of Eld and Gunther's assigned titans getting closer to them, but she paid it no mind, knowing that they could handle it. Sakura took advantage of the sound created by the rain and rode behind the last seven-meter class, slashed its Achilles' heels, got out of the way it was going to fall, then slashed its neck once she reached it once she realized Levi was nowhere to be seen.

Sakura frowned; that was weird. He usually didn't leave her alone with any of their plans because he knew how dangerous they were. She tried looking for his chakra signature and pinpointed it a bit later, with the Eld and Gunther. Why was he there?

The kunoichi stared at the disintegrating titans and decided to leave the place and join the rest. She reached them fast enough, and was surprised to see Gunther trapped in a dead titan's hand, trying to get out. Eld was helping him get out, and Levi was cleaning his swords like he usually did when he got blood on them.

She dismounted Haruto right next to Levi. "What happened?" she asked him.

"I thought I heard a yell, so I sped here and saw Gunther trapped meanwhile Eld was getting the other titan. You can guess the rest."

"So you left me alone to handle the last one? I could've died." Even if the question sounded accusing, her tone of voice was nonchalant. _She _knew she wasn't going to die, so there was no reason to make a big drama out of it. The question was, did _he _trust her to not die or did he simply not care?

The Captain looked up at her and raised an eyebrow. "There's no logical reason why that titan could've eaten you. Unless you're suicidal, there's absolutely no way you couldn't have handled it. We've fought long enough to know that."

She grinned, satisfied by his answer. "Of course! I'm the only one who can beat you so bad at sparring sessions."

"That was only one time and––"

"Captain, with due respect," Eld cut in, supporting a heaving Gunther around his shoulders, "the whole team knows it's been more than one time."

Her smile widened further at the wink the blond sent her, and she suddenly felt much more comfortable about the expedition, even with the horrible weather.

* * *

><p>She was having a nice dream, she was sure of it, until someone shook her awake. Sakura groggily woke up, her mind and body still tired from the 44th Expedition, but Petra was really insistent on something. She groaned, "Petra?"<p>

"There's something I have to tell you."

Sakura's green eyes focused on Petra, her blushing face the first thing that she noticed. What was wrong with her? She immediately sat up and put her hand on her forehead. "Hm, you're hot. Are you sick?"

Petra walked back to her bed and sat on it, peculiarly avoiding her gaze by staring at the floor. "You have to know something."

She raised a pink eyebrow. "Couldn't it wait until later?"

The younger woman ruefully shook her head, but still avoided her stare. "No, I've been wanting to tell you for a while but it's until now that I get the courage. I might not do it later."

"Okay, I get it. What is it?"

She murmured something unintelligible that not even Sakura's sensitive ears could make out.

"Come again?"

"I… I think I'm in love with Captain Levi."

Sakura blinked and processed the words once, twice, thrice. Petra in love with… the Captain? What? "Huh?"

Petra raised her head and her gaze wavered for a couple of seconds before it hardened. "I'm in love with Captain Levi," she said with much more determination.

Shit. "Where did this come from?" She had to keep her cool and not push her away. Levi wasn't a man Petra should've fallen for, and yet she did. Not only that, but she didn't want her warnings to Oluo about Petra finding another guy to become real, especially not _Levi _out of all people.

"He's… Well, I understand he's not very friendly, yes, and that he can be quite mean at times, but you remember last expedition, when he saved Gunther from that titan?"

She couldn't forget. The Captain had ditched her to the rescue, but she couldn't very well complain knowing that he had saved her teammate after all. "Yeah, what about that?"

"It made me realize that he cares more about us than he lets on. And caring in his line of work is dangerous, because any of us could always die. Yet he still tries to make us the best at our craft and improve our survival rate…"

"He's cold, but not heartless. Of course he doesn't want us to die," she said in what she hoped was a neutral tone. She had to kill Petra's love as soon as possible, or Oluo would find out and have a broken heart. Besides, Petra was being blind; Oluo and her were meant for each other on so many levels it was painful to watch.

"I know, but he's just an admirable man and I can't help but to love him."

"It sounds to me as if you have a crush," she replied truthfully. Yes, downplay her feelings and maybe she will realize her silliness. "Besides, I don't recommend getting anything serious for the Captain, Petra. You know how taboo relationships with teammates are." She wasn't going to have a repeat of what happened to Liesel and Jung, because Jung could've lived if he hadn't been so in love with Liesel.

Petra bit her lip and looked down. "I don't think it's a crush, but I agree with you on the relationship part. I wasn't… No, that would be a lie. It would be a lie for me to say that it wouldn't make me happy to know he felt the same way about me."

Oh boy.

Sakura went from her bed to Petra's and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. As much as she wanted her and Oluo to be together, she almost wanted to support her friend in her feelings. Who was she to decide who Petra was meant to be with? If she was happy with Levi, then she was happy with Levi, no ifs, ands, or buts. It was her job as her best friend to try and make that relationship come to fruition by either advising her or making it happen. "Okay, this is what we're gonna do. You keep the way you are and I'll try to find out more if he has an interest in you, alright?"

"No, no, no, you don't have to do that, Sakura. I… I don't want to find out."

"Why not?"

"Because I rather live in this uncertainty with hope than find out the cruel truth."

Oh boy, indeed. Petra really was in love.

"Oh," she offered lamely.

Petra grinned brilliantly, the perfect picture of a blushing schoolgirl. "We'll have fun with this, don't worry! But keep this a secret between girls, alright? I'll tell Amina right now before I become a coward again."

That one was easy; she would never tell Oluo in a million years.

With that the woman stood up and left the room, leaving Sakura to her thoughts. Well, it was Sunday, so they had the day off, and this day was designated to be spent with Haruto and Makimi, the gentle horse that had wormed her way to Sakura's heart. Besides, visiting them would take her mind off from this predicament.

She changed from her nightgown to her uniform, foregoing the 3DMG belts because they weren't necessary. After that it was easy to follow the routine: get a bucket full of apples, creep her way to the stable, gather grooming supplies, and scrunch her nose at the smell of horse shit.

Haruto was always happy to see her, since he always made a ruckus. This time he woke up poor Makimi from her little nap, but since she knew the apples were coming then she didn't mind. "_Oh, who's been a good girl?"_

She felt a familiar chakra signature entering the stable and she clammed up before anyone heard her speak Japanese. Sunday mornings were usually empty because nobody had assigned duties for the stall until the afternoon since everyone woke up relatively late. She turned around once she felt the presence sufficiently close and was surprised to see the short captain staring at Makimi and the bucket of apples.

Well, it was about time she was going to be busted, but why now?

"Makimi likes them," she blurted out before he could say anything.

"Makimi?"

Of _course_ her real name wasn't Makimi, stupid, she thought mockingly. "Uh, that's what I named her."

"You're telling me that after all this time, you still don't know her name?"

"No…"

Levi shook his head but offered no comment. Instead he got an apple from the bucket on the floor and gave it to Makimi. "Her name's Isabel. She used to be completely quiet and tame until a few months ago, when she started complaining whenever I visited her until I brought her an apple. Now I know it was you who spoiled her."

"It's not my fault she's so adorable. That and she's the only one that can handle being so close to Haruto."

"You mean Samson?"

"After all this time, you–– Oh." She was preparing a rant on how he was being a hypocrite for not knowing her horse's name, but she knew he was just teasing her because there was a humorous glint in his eyes she seldom saw. Wait, he was being cordial with her? What was this sorcery? "Ha, ha, very funny." His sense of humor was still shit.

Haruto started whining and moving his head up and down, which was normal, but the action seemed to be aimed at Levi, which was _weird. _Her horse only did that when he wanted to play with someone he personally knew, meaning that Levi had played with him before, but that was impossible, right?

"Your horse is impossible unless I give him apples," he explained. "Besides Isabel always refuses me unless I give some to him, so it works out in the end."

Sakura smiled coyly at Haruto, even though he probably didn't understand the action. "Oh, Haruto, you dog," she whispered to him. "I thought you liked Lea? And the Captain's horse? You go big boy!"

Lea was Gunther's horse, one stationed in another stable, but they were known to play quite frequently whenever they were relaxing in an expedition. But of course he would go for Mak–– Isabel, the Captain's precious horse.

"What are you saying?"

"Just expressing my happiness that Haruto has a loyal friend."

"One that refuses apples until I give some to him?"

"The very definition of loyalty in horse language."

Levi shook his head at her stupidity, but she could see the beginnings of a small smile. "Go make me my tea and leave it in my office."

"Yessir."

She left the stable but decided to look back before she left and was astonished to see the tender look he had reserved for only Isabel, one she thought he was incapable of producing. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea for him to look at Petra that way, and maybe it wasn't a bad thing that Petra wished it.

* * *

><p><strong>Gaaasp is that plot you see? Actual relationship development between two pigheaded titan-killers? Drama between other main characters? Addressing the amnesia issue? Why yes, your eyes don't deceive you, and I hope everyone is happy because I sure am. I know you're all itching for Sakura to reveal her powers and kick major ass in the Survey Corps, but it all has it's time. Don't worry, it'll be very soon, because next chapter...<strong>

**Is officially back to the SnK plot. Meaning things will pick up really fast after that.**

**There will be similarities and differences. Isayama is telling Eren and humanity's story, meanwhile I am exclusively dedicating my time to Sakura's story. Also, things are going to naturally delve into AU considering the nature of Sakura's powers, especially when she finally reveals them and... well, shit happens.**

**Also, some of you have asked if Sakura remembers her dreams. The answer is no. There is an explanation for this (as well as almost everything that is happening right now), and will be revealed much later on. For now, simply enjoy the Naruto-verse, because things start to get weird over there from now on.**

**My immense thanks to AmeRaSora, hotredsakura1315, Lady Light, YuukiChanLove, Basia Orci, Love Remedy, FairiesDescent, Sincerely Athena, catxangel, Atsirk Enoh, cj1of4, miss-weena, pierce through the heart, Sky65, CloudMonkey, tsukinoyume11, The Benevolent Scriber, mun3litKnight, Guest, Dyz, Ikillatfirstsight, beast of the 7 suns megidoh, xbLoOmZx, exaigon, cherryblossom1423, Geniusly-Unique, brokenmaelstrom, Guest, Mayflowerz 411, Steph, dor dor dor, and Dante's disciple for being so wonderful and leaving refreshing reviews! Also, thank you to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites! You guys are wonderful!**

**Reviews are wonderful**

**Penpal **


	12. Reunion

She should've known it was going to be a very difficult day the moment both Amina and Hange barged into her breakfast routine the morning before the 52nd Expedition.

Sakura finished drinking her milk and looked at both women with suspicion. "This doesn't look good," she murmured under her breath, but put on a bright smile when Hange sat across from her and Amina besides her.

"Ah, dear Sakura! Is it me or does your beauty grow every day?" her best friend said with an infectious grin.

The kunoichi's eye twitched and she frowned disapprovingly. "What do you want?"

Hange slapped an enthusiastic hand on the tabletop, making Sakura jump slightly. "It's more of a what do _we _want! We want you to help us capture a titan!"

The pink-haired girl blinked. They wanted what? "You want a what?"

"A titan."

Well, _yeah,_ she had heard that they wanted a titan, but _why_? "…What for?"

Amina crossed her arms and rolled her eyes at her. "Duh, to study."

"We already know how to kill them. I don't think there's anything more to study."

Hange eyed her with disappointment. "To think that Levi has corrupted you so quickly."

She bristled, not liking the comparison to her superior. "What are you talking about, the Captain 'corrupting' me?"

"That's something he would say! Besides, weren't you there when I gave Oluo a lesson on why it's important to study titans?"

Oh, yeah, she remembered that day quite well. Her fist had been this close to punching her cheek for daring to put Oluo in danger, but she later realized she had overreacted. Still, it had been quite a shock to see Hange so… pushy and violent about her agenda. Still, she had a valid point, one she had embarrassedly forgotten. "Fine, I'll help. But why did you come to me and not the team?"

Hange grinned and patted her shoulder awkwardly from across the wooden table. "Ah, thank you! We knew you were the more reasonable of them! Well, Levi will never in a million years offer his team to help me out with something he thinks is useless, even if I'm the most convincing person in the Corps." A lie, but Sakura remained wisely silent. "So I had to go for individuals, and from the team, you're the one who has the sensing ability and will least impact the team chemistry."

"What she's trying to say is that your partner is the Captain, and more often than not you never help each other out," Amina quickly added after sensing the growing tension in Sakura's shoulders. As well-meaning as Hange was, she sometimes was too blunt and had difficulty wording certain things. Moblit kept her out of physical trouble, but Amina kept her from making enemies in the Corps.

Sakura nodded, finally understanding why they had come to her. They couldn't get the whole Special Operations Squad, but getting one member was pretty darn good. "It's a bit short notice… Can we save this for the next expedition?"

"We have the team ready to take your orders. Moblit is in it too."

She perked up at this, happy to hear that she would be on a team with someone she knew. "What about Carlo?"

"Carlo is dead," Hange said tonelessly, but Sakura could sense that she was rather guilty from this fact.

Sakura looked down at her bread and suddenly felt her appetite go away. Carlo had been game-changer for Sakura, for he and Moblit told Commander Erwin of her sensory powers. Though at the moment she felt betrayed, now she was extremely grateful for what they had done, because who knows where she would be had it not been because of them. "Oh," she said lamely. "That's… I didn't know."

"I'm on that team," Amina supplied somberly. "The Squad Leader and I thought it would be best, since you know our fighting styles best."

"Yeah," she replied distractedly. "But what's the plan? Actually, hold that thought, I need to ask the Captain first."

* * *

><p>Erwin had spent precious time and resources in creating weapons and a titan-capture plan. It relied on barrels filled with hooks similar to the ones in their 3DMG. They were fired at rapid speed with the help of gas and were attached to a net. The downside of the net was that it needed to be fired from a greater height than the titan to capture them, so they would need to herd the prey to the stationary barrels, because they were too heavy to move around.<p>

Moblit and Amina had been planning this for quite some time, and had deliberately sought Sakura at the last minute for fear of ruining her cooperation. Hange knew that Levi would refuse lending his second-in-command, but it was impossible for him to refuse something that would happen the next day and relied heavily on Sakura's sensing skills. And Erwin would no way cancel the plan, so Hange had his backing. Manipulative, yes, but it worked. Levi had been furious, of course, but Hange reassured that this happened at least once every two months and they went back to being buddies and making jokes about shit.

Lovely friendship.

But that was it. Moblit and Amina knew the how to herd the titan plus all the emergency procedures meanwhile Sakura just had to find them one and guide it to the trap. Only Hange's squad was involved too, because having too many people would endanger the mission. They only wanted two titans, three tops, because Hange was unsure how much the barrels could handle, or if they were strong enough to hold multiple titans. It really depended on the titan, because two normal-sized ones would fit in one, but a big one wouldn't.

The kunoichi had located a small amount of titans near an abandoned town near one of their supply points. She tried to help Hange's squad set up the trap, but she quickly realized that she was more of a hindrance than anything else; it was very obvious her job was to make sure they didn't inadvertently run into a herd of titans.

Once the Squad Leader gave her the all clear, she set out with Moblit and Amina to lure the titans. Though Moblit was in charge of this part of the mission, Sakura was the de facto leader, considering her responsibility. It was an immense weight on her shoulders, since the point of this mission was to capture and not kill, and that required a certain set of skills Sakura didn't think she had.

After a half an hour of riding she sensed the small group of five titans, no aberrants. It was the smallest Sakura had been able to find in the short time frame she had, but since they only needed three at the most, they would need to get rid of two.

"They're two and a half kilometers away!" she shouted above the galloping of the horses.

After what felt like two seconds later they were already in plain sight of the titans. As soon as they saw the soldiers, they shot off after them at full speed.

Haruto almost went after them, and Sakura had to physically force him to turn around and flee at top speed. Poor horse was already used to heading straight into confrontation, so this deviation of the usual plan probably confused him.

This was a different kind of danger, and a different type of exhilaration. Being chased instead of chasing. She had forgotten how it felt to run away from a fight, always running towards it, never giving up. The Fall of Shiganshina had made retreat look like a cowardly thing, but she had to admit there was a very real and psychological danger to what they were doing right now.

She felt a hand reach at them and she moved Haruto out of the way, narrowly avoiding the titan that was about to grab them. Her heart was beating wildly and she almost had no time to breathe when another titan reached for her, but she dodged again. At this rate, neither one of them would be able to escape. It seemed titans never tired, or at least tired much later than their horses. Being willingly followed was quickly proven to be one of the most dangerous things Sakura had ever done.

However, that didn't mean they had to die. Five against three might seem bad, especially in open field, but they could pull it off. She just needed to make sure Moblit and Amina were up to the task.

She sped Haruto up a little to catch up with her teammates and shouted, "We're not gonna make it! Let's finish them off while we have the time!"

"No!" Moblit shouted back. "We're close. Let's press on!"

Sakura sputtered, not really believing her ears. Did… Did they seriously think they could make it? They were around ten minutes away, and the titans were starting to close in. Plus, their horses were tiring, and she knew for a fact that Haruto could sprint quickly over short distances, but his stamina was subpar. "Are you crazy? We could die!"

"I know, but we must do this!"

"This is stupid! Why would you throw your life away for this! We can't do this!"

"Someone who hasn't seen all the things the Squad Leader has done to get this opportunity will of course think this is stupid," Amina replied coldly. "If we fail right now, we might not get another chance like this. Funding only comes after success, and we need funding."

"If this is a failure, there will be no other tries," Moblit added, his voice not as controlled as Amina's.

"If we die here, there will _definitely _be no other tries! Your lives are precious!" She was starting to sound more desperate, something that rarely happened, but having a titan chasing her at top speed less than three meters away was doing strange things to her sanity.

Amina sped her white horse a bit more, putting more distance between her and Sakura. "Don't tell me what things I can sacrifice myself for," she said quickly. "I'm tired of people thinking they need to coddle me. I want this, dammit! If you're not going to trust me, kill them! But know that I will never forgive you for ruining this opportunity."

Sakura grit her teeth and weighed her options. What's more important, getting out alive or Amina's friendship? The answer was obvious in hindsight, but in her mind it was not as clear cut. They were right in the part that if they failed this mission, the Survey Corps would not spend money and time in giving them another chance to capture a titan. Their long years of effort, down the drain. But to throw away their lives for this?

Then again, Eren was willing to throw his life away for vengeance, and Mikasa would sacrifice herself for Eren. She herself was willing to give up everything for her family. Perhaps everyone had that one thing they would do anything for, and Amina had found that in investigation and science. Who was she to belittle her efforts? She puts her life where her mouth is, and remembering the cowardly girl she had met four years ago, this was a surprising improvement.

She tightened her hold on the reins and her hands started shaking. Trusting other people with their decisions was just as hard as making the decision, especially when there was no right choice, but Sakura would trust Moblit and Amina. Besides, they knew the plan better than Sakura, considering they had been plotting for months. They must've foreseen this and planned accordingly.

Almost miraculously, the town became visible, and their horses were still at it. Had they been fed something prior to the expedition to increase their stamina? Sakura was very sure Haruto couldn't handle such intense sprint for such a long time without the help of supplements, supplements she had never consented Haruto could to be fed.

They entered the town and rushed to the trap site. However, just before they made the turn to the road, a titan unexpectedly sped up and grabbed Amina and her horse. At the sight, something immediately snapped in Sakura and she began readying her 3DMG.

"No! If you go back, the rest of the titans will go after you too!"

Sakura paid Moblit no mind and immediately sent her hook to the wall of a building adjacent to the arm, signaling for Haruto to continue forward with Moblit. She used extra gas for more speed and slashed the titan's arm, forcing him to let go of Amina. Unfortunately, her friend had to fall down to the ground, but Amina's chakra let an almost hysterical Sakura know that she was alive and merely unconscious.

Now she was prey for the wounded titan and four healthy ones, plus her horse was dead, but Sakura sent a grappling hook to the ground and landed roughly. She quickly disentangled the unconscious girl from the titan's grip and picked her up in her arms, then body-flickered to the roof.

Though she always thought the titans to be mindless, she had to admit that this one time they quickly went after her, causing her to body-flicker again to another roof in another street. Their little game of cat-and-mouse continued this way, with Sakura fleeing to the west meanwhile the titans destroyed establishments just to get to her.

At this point, either the titans would get her when she finally tired or her comrades would see her "teleporting" from rooftop to rooftop, and neither of those options sounded good. Amina was blissfully unconscious in her arms, so that was good, but she was rendered useless as a ninja at the moment.

She could sense the chakra of her comrades coming her way, no doubt curious as to why the mission was taking so long, but they wouldn't be able to make it in time. Her mind was throbbing, and she subconsciously placed Amina over her shoulders and made a new seal.

A puff of smoke appeared next to her, and its wake a perfect copy of Sakura. The kunoichi wanted to be surprised, but she should've known that a ninja would have clones at its disposal. The clone drained half of her reserves, which left her with a painfully low amount of chakra; she was unable to even muster one of her jutsu now. She couldn't think of this, however, and quickly shoved Amina into her clone's arms.

"Take Amina and hide. If you feel a Survey Corps member come by you disappear, alright? If she wakes up, tell her to remain hidden and that you're going for backup. Disappear when you're out of her sight."

The clone's hold on her friend tightened and she body-flickered away just as the five titans started to close in on her. The titan's arm was regenerating too, so she would have to worry about that one. Still, she had the advantage that she was in a particularly high rooftop and she wasn't too far away from the trap.

She used an extra amount of gas to travel faster. At this moment she was only concerned in leading the titans and surviving now that Amina was safe. The roads started to become more and more familiar, and soon she knew they had won.

The blast of the barrels scared her, but the sound brought the relief that the mission was a success. Members of Hange's squad swooped by and killed the three remaining titans which remained at large.

Sakura landed on a rooftop and placed her hands on her knees, greedily gulping air. The adrenaline rushing through her veins plus her low chakra reserves made her especially wary of the people around her, even if they were her allies.

"Where's Amina?" Moblit asked, his features mixed with concern and guilt.

She gasped, "Hidden. I'll go retrieve her."

"Let me go with you."

"…All right."

Had she not instructed her clone to disappear at the first sign of a Survey Corps member, she would've denied his request. Either way, she was happy Moblit was coming with her, just in case she collapsed of exhaustion. Her weariness was threefold: of mind, body, and chakra. Having him around would certainly help.

She didn't know where her clone had taken refuge, but luckily she was very well acquainted with Amina's chakra. She had to be mindful of her gas reserves, and her exhaustion was making her eyelids heavy and her mind spin. White spots started invading her vision and she felt very hot, extremely uncomfortable. She could hear Moblit saying something, but she couldn't process his words. She started losing control of her 3DMG and when she slammed against a wall, she knew no more.

* * *

><p><em>Shizune acted as a wonderful teacher for Sakura, especially the first couple of months after Tsunade had let her do hospital rounds. After years of careful study and practice, she was now ready to treat both civilians and ninja alike, but right now Shizune had recommended that she focused on civilians, something Sakura happily did, since she didn't feel comfortable in healing her comrades.<em>

_"__Haurno-san," one of the nurses, a small woman with downturned eyes, called softly. "Shizune-sama asked that you report to room 5-B."_

_The medic-nin blinked, surprised. The A rooms were for civilians, meanwhile the B ones for ninjas. Was Shizune now asking her to look after ninjas? That made her heart start beating uncomfortably and her mind start to panic. What if she screwed up and ruined the life of a friend?_

_She nodded and got her lab coat from the nurse's station. So much for a relaxing break. Working at the hospital had taught her to cherish these precious few moments and catch up on sleep, because considering how busy the hospitals were, there was no rest for the weary. _

_Sakura made her way through rather empty hallways to the third floor, where they started to house the ninjas. 1-B… 2-B… 3-B… 4-B… Sakura took in a deep breath and tried to figure out the chakra signatures that were behind the door. One of them was Shizune's, but the other one was unknown but strangely familiar._

_She opened the door and almost froze when she saw Itachi on the bed, with the normal jounin attire, his back against the headrest. He still looked as emotionless as ever, but there was a bit of discomfort on his face. Just like his brother, he seemed to detest hospitals… Actually, every ninja hated hospitals, and apparently this one wasn't any different._

_"__Ah, Sakura! Here she is. I'm sure you're already acquainted with Uchiha-san." She smiled encouragingly at her, and she had no choice but to nod along. "He has agreed to be your first ninja patient. I will be here to supervise, but pretend as if I'm not here."_

_The medic-nin tried to hide her gulp and nodded with the calmest smile she could muster. She went through the steps, asking him how he was feeling and if there were any pains or discomforts, and she began healing the areas he said he was wounded. This whole time she couldn't help but wonder why Itachi Uchiha had agreed to become her first patient, considering that he knew that she had an intense hatred and fear for him. Even if he had been ordered by Konoha to do whatever he did (and that brought her own questioning of her own village), she couldn't forgive all the misery he had inadvertently caused Sasuke. It just wasn't fair, and now her teammate had left because of the man laying on the bed._

_Maybe that was why Shizune had asked Itachi to be her first ninja patient. If she was able to act cordial with the man she despised, then there was no way bias would ever get in the way of her work._

_Someone knocked the door and, after receiving confirmation to enter, a nurse walked in. "Shizune-sama, we have problems with patient 20-B. She is very adamant in leaving." She appeared meek, no doubt intimidated by the wounded ninja, something that happened often._

_A dark look crossed Shizune. She detested difficult patients (which was admittedly any ninja at a moment in time), mostly because nurses were scared of them and that just added extra work to the medic-nin, who sometimes had other, more important things to do. "I can leave this one to you, right?" she asked Sakura._

_She nodded with a grin. "I got this. Good luck there!"_

_Shizune huffed and left the room, taking her dark mood along with her. _

_As soon as the door closed, a certain awkwardness descended on the room. It was easy to follow all the rules and regulations with supervision, but now that Shizune was gone, she could deviate from the norm and make small-talk or a joke or a wayward comment. And doing that with Itachi would be close to impossible considering her conflicting emotions towards him._

_"__You don't like me very much, do you," he spoke, and though it was meant to be a question, Sakura knew that there was no use in lying._

_She shook her head slowly, pointedly avoiding his gaze and focusing on healing his nasty gash on the thigh. "No."_

_He hummed calmly, not at all put down by her snappish tone. "I don't blame you. I––"_

_"__Don't misunderstand me," she interrupted, her eyes firmly rooted on the purple skin that was starting to regain its normal color. "I know why you did it, and I'm grateful for it. You're a hero in most people's eyes now. I just can't forgive the trauma you gave Sasuke-kun… Look where he is now."_

_"__I know," he replied softly. "I made a mistake, and I'm trying to fix it, but not only with Sasuke."_

_Sakura finally caved and met his gaze, which was strangely intense for a man usually so unaffected. "What do you mean?"_

_"__Uzumaki-san told me you're having trouble finding a suitable instructor for water chakra manipulation."_

_She stiffened and almost lost concentration with her healing. She had confided in Kushina about her trouble finding someone to teach her water jutsu. Her father, though he knew some jutsu, proved to be a horrible teacher and they had decided to find someone else. But finding a water chakra user in the Land of Fire was harder than most people thought. Even Kakashi, who knew a wide variety of jutsu, was below average at water jutsu. But why was Itachi bringing this up? "So what?"_

_"__Even though the Uchiha clan excels at fire jutsu, I always preferred water. I could teach you."_

_Suddenly his earlier statement made much more sense, and Sakura couldn't help but bristle. "So this is your idea of 'fixing' your mistake, Uchiha-san? You sure have a long list ahead of you," she sneered. "Guilty people don't make good teachers."_

_"__Rectifying something begins with guilt yes," he admitted, a bit less monotone than usual, "but that doesn't make my offer any less true. Or my help to Kushina-san false. Or my desire to help Kakashi improve his Sharingan usage a fluke."_

_She averted her eyes and focused on his wound, which was now mostly healed. Now she just needed to do the finishing touches and check his vitals, but she wanted to prolong the process and see where the conversation took them. "Why me?" She could understand why he needed to make it up to Kushina; Mikoto Uchiha, Itachi and Sasuke's mother, had been Kushina's best friend. Itachi had tortured Kakashi with Tsukuyomi, leaving him traumatized and in bed for a week. He probably also needed to make it up to Naruto and others, but they were wary of him. But Itachi had not once done something directly to her, so why was he doing this?_

_"__I know Sasuke tried to kill you the night before he left. Perhaps I didn't do something directly to you, but all the hurtful things Sasuke has done can be traced back to me."_

_Sakura stopped her healing and gave Itachi a stern look. "You can't take responsibility for everything Sasuke does. That's unfair. He' s his own person, and while you did influence who he is today, his past does not define him completely." _

_The Uchiha smiled self-deprecatingly, a sentiment that didn't suit him completely. "Your logic is right, I think the same way, but I don't feel that way. Now, I was serious about the offer, Haruno-san. Do you need someone to help you with water manipulation?"_

_Well, now was not the time to be stupid. As much as she disliked him, he was _the _Itachi Uchiha, renowned genius among the elite. Who would say no to such an offer, besides the proud? "I think that would be a good idea."_

* * *

><p>When Sakura woke up, she sincerely wished to go back to sleep, considering her splitting headache. The bedsheets were too new to be hers and the furniture was arranged differently to be the room she shared with Petra. She was probably in the hospital ward, a place she had visited once after a training accident. No light was seeping through the window, denoting either very early morning or the beginning of the night. Still, she had never been comfortable, so the sooner she reached her own room, the better she would feel.<p>

She stood up and grimaced slightly at the horrendous night gown she was wearing. Who knew how many other people had worn this before? Filthy. A dizzy spell soon hit her after finishing her thought, her body still not completely ready to get up, but it was too late to whine now.

The kunoichi searched for her clothes and was happy to find them laying on a bedside table. She took of her gown and almost fainted of relief when she saw her chest bindings were the same ones she had wrapped before the expedition. It would be unfortunate if people saw the purple rhombus over her heart. It would no doubt raise questions, inquiries she wasn't ready to answer and she couldn't reply. Even she wasn't exactly sure what it was, other than it held an immense amount of dormant chakra. If she only knew how to access that power and how to use it…

She found her clothes at the footrest of the bed and quickly changed, no longer able to handle the odor, and left the nightgown neatly folded on the bed. A bath was in order, but first she had to find out some things, namely if the mission was a success or how long she had been out. In good plan, it took about a half a day to get over chakra exhaustion, but adding the mental and physical exhaustion… A day tops.

Sakura opened the door and noiselessly stalked the hallways. She sent chakra to her eyesight to improve her night vision, and soon she was navigating out of the hospital building and into the mess hall. From there getting back to the Special Operations wing was easy as pie.

As happy as she was to be back in her room, she just couldn't go back to sleep, especially smelling as she did. She quietly opened the door, cursing the squeaky wood, but sighed in relief when Petra simply moaned softly and changed sleeping position. Sakura went to her wardrobe and got out a towel and a new uniform, then left as quietly as she had arrived.

The bathroom would of course be empty at this time, so she just went inside. The room was absolutely dark, but the chakra powering her eyesight made it seem as if she were in broad daylight. She drew a bath and as soon as the water reached the halfway mark, she went in, the coldness waking her up completely.

Her muscles relaxed and she let out a content sigh, which quickly made her frown. Here she was enjoying herself with a bath and she still hadn't checked whether Amina and Moblit were fine? What kind of comrade was she? But then again, nobody would be awake at this time. She should've just gone back to sleep, but such an idea was impossible now that her body was wide awake.

Light started seeping through the window so slowly that when Sakura realized it, dawn had already come and her fingers had turned into prunes. She got out of the bath, dried herself, then put on her uniform. There was no way she was going to sit down from practice, even if she had just woken up recently.

She opened the door slowly and went back to her room, where Petra was already up and putting on her boots. She looked up from her work and scowled at Sakura. "Couldn't you rest for more than five hours?"

"How was the mission?"

The woman shook her head and grunted. "Success. Though you should seriously rest. What you did was––"

"Dangerous, yeah. But I saved Amina, right?"

Petra sighed and stood up from the bed. They had been together in the Special Operations Squad for almost a year now, and she could see the changes in Petra's demeanor. Oh, she was still a sweetheart, but there was a hidden strength that had not been there before, one that appeared after being entrusted with a great responsibility. Even though Sakura was technically her superior, she felt every bit an equal next to Petra. "I know, and for that I'm grateful. You should know I will never criticize a decision you make. I trust you."

Sakura smiled, happy to hear the words even if she knew them to be true if left unsaid. "I know, but I have to admit I'm not fully convinced with the decision Squad Leader Hange took. It was too dangerous."

"I had my qualms about it, but you seemed excited so I didn't say anything."

"They gave Haruto something to increase his endurance. Not only that, but they supplied me minimal information about the mission. I was in grave danger. If I wasn't a––" Well, she was going to say ninja, but she couldn't come out and say that, right? "If I hadn't been lucky, Amina and I would be dead."

"More troubling is that the Captain let you go on this mission. He should've refused, right?"

In that area, Petra was wrong. Sakura had been happy Levi had respected her decision, whether it was because he trusted her or because Hange had really manipulated him with the last minute decision. Yes, she was his second-in-command, but he had to give her some leeway in what she could do, right? "No, that's fine. He knows I'm not stupid enough to die." But she had been stupid enough to accept a mission with minimal information. She would have a stern talking with Amina about this.

"Let's just not repeat this, all right? And Amina… I'll talk to her. There are some things we must settle."

Sakura shivered at how menacing Petra sounded, and she truly feared for her best friend. "Wait, Petra, I should be the one to talk to her."

"No, I will. Besides, the Captain requested that you meet him in his office as soon as possible." She walked past her and went for the doorknob.

She blinked. "He's awake?"

Petra threw her a smirk and opened the door. "You were in the bathroom a very long time."

Well, now she really had no choice but to go to his office. She kind of owed him, in a way. He had trusted her rather dangerous and stupid decision, so she should return the courtesy and receive his chastisement. Now that she looked back to it, Levi had seemed more annoyed at her than at Hange's request, and it was no doubt her stupidity at accepting such a risky mission with almost no information. In the end things had gone well, but if she hadn't been a ninja, both she and Amina would be in a titan's stomach by now.

Sakura knocked on the door and jumped slightly when she heard the confirmation to go in. She opened and saluted immediately, though she was unsurprised to see him boring holes at his paperwork. She quickly crossed his room and sat in the right chair opposite to his desk, waiting patiently until he finished.

"Now you know why I wanted you to refuse Shitty-glasses, right?" Levi said without even looking up. Normally this would annoy the shit out of her, but right now she had no right. "She's smart. She knows that not only you're a sensor, but you relish doing dangerous things and you have a stupid ego. And this mission had suicide stamped on it."

"She wouldn't give me a mission if she knew it would kill me," Sakura quickly replied, defending Hange. She was the one who accepted, she was the one who could've said no. She even ignored his criticism of her in favor for keeping Hange out of it. There was no reason to blame Hange for her decisions. "Besides, there was a good reason why the mission was short-notice."

Levi finally stopped moving his pen and gave her a cold glare. "Ah, because I would've refused, no? Well, there is a grain of truth in that. Yes, there is no way I would let Hange borrow one of my subordinates, and she did place me in an uncomfortable position with it being so abrupt. But there was a good reason why I would've refused if I had been given time, and it's not because of the lack of information.

"There have been missions where everyone just follows orders and no one really knows what's going on, and it's required of the soldiers to be obedient and not question anything. I would've refused because you're not trained to lead titans, Ackerman; you've spent all this time killing them. I hope this has been an eye-opening experience for you, and don't make a stupid decision again. You may not regret it this time, but I'm not so sure about next time."

Sakura opened her mouth, ready for a hot reply, but thought better of head and simply shut herself and nodded. Levi was right, as much as she loathed to admit it. She had been excited to please Amina and use her powers for another squad, but she hadn't thought about the danger she was putting herself in. Petra wanted to scold Amina, but Sakura also needed a harsh talk.

"What, no reply?" Levi prodded, strangely amused. "That hit to the head must've been harder than what I thought."

"Now that you mention it, perhaps it was. I should be excused from practice today, no?"

"Tough shit, Ackerman. You're getting beat up today, and not only by me. I'm sure the rest of the squad has a few select punches for you."

Sakura sighed deeply and nodded in defeat, but she couldn't help the small smile at the thought of practice with her squad.

* * *

><p>The people of Trost were unusually cheery the morning of the 56th Expedition. The Survey Corps had brought many successes in the year 850, from extending supply points for more than two hundred kilometers south of Wall Rose to capturing two titans for research purposes. The people were happy, the Survey Corps was happy, and, even more bewildering, the Military Police didn't look at them like cockroaches.<p>

Sakura didn't want to seem conceited, but she had to admit that some of those successes were the result of her own sensory powers. She and Mike provided valuable intel to Erwin, ranging from titan location as well as aberrant status. Her own power was a bit more refined than Mike's, since now she could sense them as much as four kilometers away, and she had become acquainted with her own teammates' chakra signatures so she always knew how safe they were.

Her popularity in the Survey Corps had become much bigger, but it hadn't quite caught on like Levi or Erwin's popularity in the general populace, mostly because her ability to sense titans was not exactly a secret, but not exactly advertised. The soldiers had kept quiet for around two years, and when Sakura gathered courage to question her Commander's decisions, she received a cryptic smile and a rueful reply, "I don't really trust them."

Who _them _was remained a mystery, but as long as she got to keep her comfortable position in the Survey Corps, she didn't mind.

Eld's chuckles brought her back to the present. "They're rather rowdy today, aren't they?"

Sakura smiled and also observed the crowd with satisfied smile. "Must be the fresh meat. They graduate soon, right?"

"That explains. Shouldn't your sister be in there?"

"Yeah. She must be here somewhe–– Ah, there she is."

Sakura spotted her adopted sibling standing next to Eren and Armin. They were currently speaking with a Garrison soldier, one that looked strangely familiar but she couldn't quite put a finger on where she had seen him.

The blond Garrison soldier seemed to remember her, however, because he paled when he met her eyes and hastily broke contact with her, as if he were _scared _of her. Sakura frowned, concerned; she hadn't hit him, right?

Eren followed the source of the Garrison soldier's discomfort and waved excitedly at her. Armin seemed happy to see her as well, but he was more subdued in his greeting, and Mikasa, though she was with her friends, seemed to be in deep thought about something else. She smiled and waved back, happy to have seen her wards before leaving.

"You know them?" Gunther asked. "I didn't peg you as the type to be a mentor. You have no patience for children."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "What do you mean I have no patience? I put up with all of you, don't I?"

"Barely."

Sakura huffed but didn't argue; she was rather snappish after all. "The brunet's family took Mikasa and me in after our parents died, so Eren's like an adopted brother." So was Mikasa, for that matter, but nobody knew that. "The blond's grandfather is the reason why I joined the military, and he saved my life after Shiganshina fell, so I look after Armin in his stead."

Though Eld was focusing on the road ahead and wasn't looking at her, Sakura knew that his frown was caused by what she told him. "Sometimes I forget that you lived in Shiganshina…"

"Sometimes I do too," she murmured.

"Hey, Pinky! Wanna make a bet!"

Sakura resisted the urge to groan; she was having a mildly intimate moment with her teammates, but trust Oluo to be an idiot and ruin it. "I'll beat you anyway, old man. Give me a good reason why."

Oluo sped up and pushed poor Eld out of the way. The blond shot the younger man a rather nasty look, but Oluo was being such a thickhead that he didn't even notice. "Don't act so high and––" He bit his tongue harshly and blood sprayed in the air.

Sakura sighed, shook her head, and urged Haruto to move faster, leaving the eventual chastisement Petra would give him for being so stupid and for wearing the cravat.

They came to a stop and waited for the gates to open. The crowd started dissipating, but Sakura still felt light and content knowing that the people were supportive of them. She remembered how the Shiganshina citizens looked at the Survey Corps of the time, with growing weariness and complaints of taxpayer money going to some foolish dream of taking back the land from the titans.

It was a foolish dream, Sakura admitted that, but at least the people around her didn't think so.

On the positive side, the way was clear today, so they would be able to travel faster and farther. They've had trouble in the previous expeditions, because the sheer number of titans forced them to retreat before they actually engaged with titans. Today, though, the way was strangely devoid of titans. The Levi Squad had spent a couple of hours hunting for titans, but nothing had showed up.

The gates opened, and the Commander ordered the one hundred soldiers to move. Haruto neighed loudly and followed Isabel and the Captain closely, ecstatic to be out in the open. Their friendship surprised Sakura, since horses, just like humans, didn't get much time to get acquainted, considering the high mortality rate in the Survey Corps. Petra had already lost her own horse three months ago, and though it was devastating, she got used to her new one. But Haruto and Isabel had been together for almost a year now, something almost unheard of in their situation.

Just like what they had confirmed earlier, the way to the next supply point was empty, eerily so. Most of her squad mates felt happy, but both Levi and Sakura were put off by how _convenient _everything was going. Sure, this meant less casualties, but if titans were absent, it was because there was _something _making them absent. Something more sinister and mysterious than titans? Kill her now, please.

With the help of the Long Range Scouting Formation and the amazing luck they had, they were able to travel three hours without any hassles, but finally encountered a problem when they found out one of their supply points was infested with titans. Luckily, it was a town, so that meant that the 3DMG was perfectly usable and they were at an advantage.

Erwin signaled all of the Survey Corps members to focus their efforts to clear the town of titans and claim back their supply point. Oluo and Petra were excited to get back in action and disappeared as soon as they were able to locate a titan, meanwhile Gunther and Eld were much more subdued about it. Both Levi and Sakura stayed on their horses for a little while until she located an eleven-meter and immediately went after it. She heard Levi going the other way, meaning that he was getting the thirteen-meter further down the road.

Levi was in the middle of killing it when Sakura saw an eight-meter running down the little dirt path, intent on colliding with him. Sakura sighed and aimed her hooks towards its eyes. Once she stabbed them, she sent the gas down to boost her up, flipped over its head, attached herself to the nape, and slashed it twice. The titan abruptly stopped running and started falling, but by then Sakura was already perched on a rooftop, watching the blood disintegrate from her green cape.

The Captain didn't even look at her twice before shooting off into another titan, leaving her behind. They had a bit of an unorthodox partnership, but it worked. Instead of taking down a single titan together most of the time, they focused on staying out of each other's way and clearing the path. They worked best solo, but she had to admit that not worrying about surrounding titans was a nice plus. Of course, there were times when she was in a pinch and he came to the rescue and there were other times when a titan surprised the Captain, so she helped him out, but those instances were so few and far in between that they were somewhat of an anomaly.

Sakura located Amina fending by herself and decided to lend her a helping hand. She was expecting to be rebuked by her, but the kunoichi was surprised to see a grateful smile once they were relatively safe on a house's rooftop. "Thanks," she said sincerely. "I didn't think I could handle that."

"You were a bit out of it. Are you sure you're fine?"

Amina nodded and started searching around. "Yeah, I was trying to keep it alive. Squad Leader Hange asked me to see if I could study some of the titan hunting patterns."

"Isn't Sonny and Bean enough for studying?" she asked, trying to mask her annoyance. Sakura had helped her get her hands on those two titans, and it hadn't been easy. Now she wanted more, and she was putting her best friend's life in danger for that? She was a bit upset about that, but wisely kept her mouth shut, considering that Amina idolized Hange.

"There's so much we can learn from them. We can't study titan killing because they're chained. A lot is at stake here."

"Just… Don't do this alone, will you? I'll help you out." Once Amina had something in mind, nothing would dissuade her. Whether it was a personality trait or Sina lifestyle coddling, if Amina wanted something, she would get it.

"Thanks, Sakura. We're setting our aims on a bigger one. The one you just killed was a bit small, so let's look for a bigger titan."

Before, such a task would've been impossible, since Sakura's sensing abilities weren't sensitive enough to pinpoint titans with high density, just like how finding a single human in a town was almost impossible, but she had gotten better and she could now guess their general location, something that helped the Survey Corps immensely when trying to set up a supply point.

They were about to send their hooks in search of the nearest titan when a yellow flare was shot near the town's center. Amina and Sakura looked at each other, confused, but set off in the direction of the flare. Yellow was seldom used in the Survey Corps, with everyone using green, black, or red. It was so rare to use yellow that Sakura wasn't exactly sure what it meant.

A group of Survey Corps members was already gathered at the flare's origin. Sakura landed neatly next to Commander Erwin, with Amina in tow. Levi and the rest of the squad was already there, but they were too numb to look at her arrival.

"Commander, we came as fast as we could. What is going on?"

Erwin glanced at her, and, even though she had no idea what she was going to hear, she felt nervous. She had never seen her commander so at a loss. He always was two steps ahead of everyone, but, at this moment, he was just as shocked as the rest of them. "Wall Rose has been breached by the Trost District. We are to aid them immediately."

Sakura blinked, processed the words, and then looked at her teammates for confirmation. Trost… Her eyes widened and she felt fear grip her heart, making it beat faster every second. Her wards were in Trost, she had just seen them four hours ago! Where they alive? No, now was not the time for such negative thoughts. She needed to get there as soon as possible.

"Where are our horses?" she asked her squad. Everyone, except Levi, looked at her in confusion. "Well, you heard the Commander. We're going as reinforcements."

"But Sakura… What awaits us there? If Wall Rose has been breached… We don't have a home anymore and––"

"Shut up, Petra," she growled, surprising her group. She usually treated her best friend with gentleness and care. "It doesn't matter right now. We're going there."

"We're sending a preliminary group of around twenty to Trost," the Commander continued, dissuading the tension that was building amongst his soldiers. Sakura's optimism had been surprising, but not unwanted. Spurring a group of hopeless soldiers was a task not many could do, and Erwin's charisma hadn't reached that level. "I was hoping Squad Levi be part of this group meanwhile the rest of the Survey Corps regroups."

"Tch, you should already know the answer, Erwin. All right, get your horses. We're leaving."

Their well-trained horses were waiting for them in the same area they had left them off, out of sight. Even though titans didn't prey on horses, the Survey Corps trainers still made them look for spots away from titans, just to make the soldiers' lives easier. Sakura quickly mounted Haruto and headed back whence they came, not even waiting for Levi to give the order. She had been good with him all this time, following his instructions, but right now she needed to hurry back.

Trost was three hours away with the Survey Corps, but around two hours away with a fast horse and a small company. She knew that she shouldn't push Haruto too hard, but she just wanted to reach her wards as soon as possible. They had no doubt been sent to battle, that with a shortage of soldiers. Just thinking about it made her shiver and want to push Haruto even harder.

Then there was the matter of what to do afterwards. Considering they were all alive ––she shuddered at the thought of it being otherwise–– what would happen to them once they had lent their helping hand? Retreat back to Wall Sina and wait for the refugees to be sent back life before? No rest for the weary, indeed, but things would descend into anarchy. Then again, Sakura was sure she could lead her wards to safety outside safe land. If she continued practicing, she could dispose of titans with her chakra scalpels and––

She could see Wall Rose in the distance and she quickly pushed those thoughts away. Now was not the time to be thinking about the future; she needed to focus on the now.

"It appears the gate has been compromised," Levi shouted from his position ahead. Indeed, there appeared to be some huge rock covering the entrance. Sakura felt a surge of hope rising within her. "We will need to scale the wall!"

"How are we supposed to do that?" one of the soldiers exclaimed. He was from another squad, and was not used to hearing Levi's weird ideas. Not that they had much of a choice, considering their only way of coming in was unavailable.

"Watch and learn!"

As soon as they were close enough, Levi sent one of his hooks as far up as he could and he left Isabel. He used all of his gas supply to the left, pushing him to the right. The length of the wire and the inertia behind the gas almost made him a giant pendulum, and with all the momentum he easily scaled more than half the wall. Once he reached the peak of the motion, he simply repeated the process until he landed on top of the wall.

Sakura grinned, amazed but not at all surprised at her captain. Trust him to make such outlandish feats. "Well, you saw the Captain! Let's go and kill some titans!"

Squad Levi and the other soldiers they had brought with them cheered with her and tried to replicate the Captain's movements, but most of them needed more tries. Well, Levi had not only showed his creativity, but also his skill and mastery over the dynamics of the 3DMG. Out of the group, only Sakura was able to replicate it on the first try, and she was considerably more sloppy and used too much gas.

The kunoichi ran through the top and threw herself to the ground, latching herself on the neck of a titan directly below her. She cut the nape easily and––

"Eren? Armin? Mikasa?" she exclaimed as soon as she finished killing the titan. It appeared her captain had saved them, because he was standing directly in front of them on top of a titan's carcass.

She landed on the ground and ran to them, not caring if her speed seemed a little impossible at the moment. She hugged them Mikasa and Armin immediately, since Eren was on the floor, out of it, and pointedly ignoring the curious look she felt from Levi. "Oh, you're safe! You're safe!" She looked down and saw they were at the foot of a titan that looked eerily like Eren. "What is this?"

Armin shook his head and put a hand on Sakura's shoulder, pushing lightly. His blue eyes were determined, but there was an undertone of fear as well. "It's a long story. We need to get to safety."

The pink-haired woman nodded, her demeanor now serious, and she looked up to her captain. "I'm taking these three to safety, sir!"

Levi nodded. "Help with cleanup when you come back," he ordered before he shot one of his hooks to a nearby house, already in titan-killing mode, not even waiting for her reply. There was no need; he knew she would follow his command.

Honestly, Sakura was very worried about Eren, but right now she needed to get the out of this mess. Besides, the longer she looked at the blood, the crazier she would get. "Armin, take Eren with you. Mikasa, you will lead and I will cover rear. I will sense for titans, and we're avoiding unless they're following us. In that case, I will dispatch of them. And this is an order."

The two lucid teenagers nodded at her quickly, unaccustomed to hearing that tone of voice. Well, after all the coddling, they probably thought her incapable of speaking to them in that way, but she had never felt so afraid in her life. All of her precious people were here, in one same battle. The quicker she could get them out of it, the better. Wall Rose's outer wall had been breached, but the inner wall seemed fine, at least for now. That was where Sakura planned to take them.

As soon as Armin firmly secured Eren to his side, Mikasa shot off in the direction Sakura commanded. Thanks to her more exact sensing abilities, they were able to avoid all the titans in Trost, a feat in and of itself. Once they were close to Wall Rose, a rather large group of soldiers met them halfway, their demeanors solemn and thankful. Just _what _had her wards done?

"Can you take them from here?" Sakura asked them after they all landed on the rooftop of a rather large house.

The five soldiers openly eyed her green cape, as if they were realizing that the fight was just starting for her. "Yes, we can," a female soldier replied, her voice firm.

Mikasa and Armin stared at her in confusion. They probably didn't know what Levi meant by "cleanup," or maybe they knew but they thought she would accompany them for longer. Either way, confusion made way for nervousness. "Sakura," Mikasa began, her normally toneless voice gripped with fear.

"I'll be back. You go back inside and relax. You have done your part, now let me do mine."

The female soldier took Eren out of Armin's grasp and left alone with two other soldiers. Her sister didn't look pleased by the prospect of a stranger handling Eren, but she surprisingly didn't say anything, opting to give Sakura a hug.

The kunoichi stiffened, taken off guard. Sakura was usually the affectionate one out of the group, and Mikasa starting contact as intimate as this in open field was almost unheard of. Just what had happened? What had they seen to make them like this? "Remember your promise."

She patted her back and warmly replied, "Of course."

Mikasa released her and, with one last look, shot her hook and headed in the same direction the soldiers had taken of. Only Armin remained, and he looked as if he wanted to say something, but Sakura beat him to it. "I don't know what you did, Armin, but you did admirably; I'm proud of you. Now go and rest. I'll clean Trost from this filth."

* * *

><p><strong>In case Hange's plan hadn't been clear, here's the train of thought. She knew Levi wouldn't help them capture the titans (deviation from canon), and wouldn't allow one of his subordinates to go on that mission because he knows what his subordinates are made to do. Besides, if this had months of anticipation, he could refuse and they would simply look for someone else, therefore absolving him from blame. So, for a couple of months, Squad Hange planned for months and suddenly asked Sakura at the last minute. She accepted, because of the reasons listed above, and Levi couldn't refuse because the plan was on the same day and if he refused, it would fail and Erwin wouldn't be pleased after spending all that money. They gave Haruto medicine to make him stronger that, though not life-threatening, sure isn't very healthy. And Sakura wasn't aware of all the details because she didn't need to know.<strong>

****Updating will now move to once every three weeks.** I usually post chapters once I'm done with the next (except this one; I just finished writing ****this chapter and I haven't finished chapter 13), but that will change. I want to have a supply of chapters so that when I start college my updates don't become few and far in between. That and I have to take care of my other stories, which have gotten the short end of the stick lately. Never fear, though, a complete sign will appear on The Vessel (unless I die, but I find that very improbable considering my lifestyle).**

**As always, a million thanks to Despairchan, pierce through the heart, ,mun3litKnight, Sincerely Athena, Geniusly-Unique, AmeRaSora, Love Remedy, catxangel, Lucia Tsukiyomi-hime, hotredsakura1315, FairiesDescent, xbLoOmZx, YuukiChanLove, Gibbles, Boingy, Basia Orci, dor dor for, cherryblossom1423 , Lady Light, Steph, serena, Amaya Albarn, Mayflowerz 411, Duowolf, thentherewasIA, and dark-wolf-howl for being so wonderful and leaving such amazing reviews! Your kind words encourage me! And a multitude of thanks to those who follow, favorite, or simply read the story! The number of visitors this story has leaves me amazed!**

**Reviews are love.**

**Penpal**


	13. Aftermath

Cleanup took a grand total of two days, not because the task was particularly hard, but because Garrison soldiers had trouble stomaching the destruction of their home. Loss and death was something the Survey Corps was intimately acquainted with, but the same could not be said about the general populace, or even the Garrison soldiers. Their faces were absolutely destroyed. Every titan they felled brought no joy, no anger; it simply reminded them there was a real danger out there, one they couldn't fight.

Sakura heard rumors, whispers of the Colossal Titan attacking and disappearing again. She also heard stories of a green-eyed human who could turn into a titan, and, though he had helped them seal the giant hole on the wall, most of the soldiers were unsure how to react to him. On one hand, he helped humanity win their first battle, but there was also the sea of doubt on what would happen if he was unable to control his power. Everyone avoided to say his name, as though mentioning him would summon him like some demon spirit.

She had an inkling on who this human was, but she would wait until someone confirmed his identity for her before she jumped into conclusions.

The streets were mostly destroyed, and the houses that hadn't been obliterated by titans showed dents from 3DMG hooks or upturned tiles in the roofs. Trost would have a hard time recuperating from such a blow, but she only had one place in mind she wanted to visit. She hoped it was unharmed, but she knew better than to hope in this world.

She landed gently in front of the Leaping Horse and eyed with growing sadness the caved in roof, the upturned neighbors' establishments, the roads littered with fallen debris. She should be angry, by all means, but all she could manage was an intense grief, as if she was seeing her childhood falling apart one more time. Her adoptive parents' murder marked the end of her happiness, the Fall of Shiganshina marked the end of her safety… What would this serve to mark?

Did this world have no safe haven for her?

Being in Trost at this time would be near suicidal. Only a select few citizens had volunteered to search for any survivors or clean up anything they could meanwhile the soldiers killed the titans. Granted, titans had been obliterated from this section of Trost first, but she didn't blame anyone who would avoid being here.

Sakura had left behind her teammates to come here, but she had felt an overwhelming urge to search for him. Her mind had no idea why, but her heart wanted to find him and for once she just followed her instincts.

The entrance to the Leaping Horse was unobstructed, so she went in. The place was dark and almost desolate, with upside-down chairs and tables and spilt beer in the floor and smashed glass everywhere she looked. But even in this mess she saw and felt the chakra of the two crouched people in the far side of the bar, cleaning and scrubbing the floor.

Her heart momentarily skipped a beat, and she forced herself to get a hold of her emotions.

Her boots stepped on some of the glass, alerting the two men of her presence. The two men turned to her in alarm, but calmed down when they saw who it is. The owner of the bar had something akin to relief on his eyes, but Sakura also saw the underlying defeat, even in the darkness. He was tired, so very beat. Sakura could empathize; surviving was very exhausting. At least the dead never feared for the future.

"Go," the owner of the bar told the person who was helping him clean.

Sebastian seemed unconvinced, but he nodded after the owner of the bar gave him a meaningful look and immediately headed towards Sakura's side, the hesitance of his steps weighing him down.

Her heart sighed in relief at seeing Sebastian safe and sound. After securing her three wards and her teammates, Sebastian was the only person who had remained unaccounted for. Even if she still didn't trust him completely, he was still her friend, and she would've been destroyed if he had died.

He ogled her uniform, and for the first time Sakura realized that he had never seen her as she was, a soldier of the Survey Corps. She knew he was probably thinking about all the times she could've died, every month, with every encounter possibly being their last. It was one thing knowing that their meetings could end any day, but it was another thing _understanding _what that meant.

Sakura licked her lips and stared everywhere that was not his face. Those scared eyes of his were driving her crazy. She was supposed to worry about everyone else, not the other way around. "Shall we go outside?" she asked after the silence threatened to drive her insane. There was never a time when one of them _wasn't _talking. She relished quietness at times, but with Sebastian… She had always liked hearing his voice.

Sebastian nodded, his mouth a tight line, as if he didn't trust himself to speak, adding to her aggravation. She wanted him to speak, dammit! She wasn't dead!

The sunlight affected him more than it affected her. He probably had spent most of the day stuck in that bar, cleaning with the owner. Had he gone out and eaten something? Had he been looking for survivors? Judging from the relative cleanliness of his long-sleeved white shirt, he must've stayed away from debris. His black pants were a bit dirtied around the knees, but he didn't seem to care. There was something off about Sebastian, besides his newfound vow of silence. After a moment of studying him, she realized it was his eyes. His blue eyes had always been carefree and full of laughter, but now they were grim and hard.

They started walking, uncaring that the streets were uncomfortable to walk in or that a small amount of titans were still out on the streets. Besides, as long as Sakura was there, nothing would happen to Sebastian.

"I'm surprised you're here… I would've thought you would be in the refugee camps."

She felt his gaze on her, but she kept staring ahead, not trusting herself to look at him. She didn't want to meet his destroyed gaze, one that mirrored her own a long time ago. Protecting people went farther than protecting them from physical harm, but there were some instances she couldn't protect anyone from.

"Yeah, I was surprised too," he replied softly. "But I was there, when they attacked. I've never felt so scared and helpless before in my life. The people's panic became my panic, and it just grew until I felt I was choking and there was nowhere to run and––"

Sakura cringed and gritted her teeth, now pointedly looking forward. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Sebastian came to a stop, forcing Sakura to also halt and to stare at him. His features were still hard, but there was a light in his eyes that hadn't been there before. "No, I want… No, I need to talk about it," he whispered harshly. "Two days ago I saw people become titan meals before my very eyes. I'm still not sure how I'm alive right now. I must be a very lucky bastard to some, but right now I don't feel very lucky at all." There was the desperation Sakura had felt in him, the tight coil frustration unwinding with every word he spoke, with every feeling he recognized. Talking was always therapeutic, and Sebastian was helping himself unknowingly. "And I know myself enough to know that this is the beginning, that it'll only get worse the more I live. That I will be on my deathbed and I'll still remember all the people that died today.

"But I also know that you have lived this longer than I have," he continued much more calmly. "I've known you're a soldier the moment I saw you, not because of my mission, but because there was something in the way you stood. In the snappish way you treated me. In the way you felt uncomfortable with smiling. But I never understood what any of that really meant. You've seen horrible things too, right? You… You can help me, right? You can help me forget."

Her green eyes were impossibly wide at him, surprised at his earnest tone. He was staring at her as if she was his salvation, as if she could solve all of his problems with calculated words, with gentle caresses, with unconditional support. But he was staring at the wrong person; she couldn't even help herself, how could she help another person?

But she was not heartless. Especially not to Sebastian, who had served as her reprieve from soldier life and responsibilities. She slowly, carefully, placed her palm against his cheek, feeling the light stubble underneath her fingertips. He closed his eyes and leaned in to her touch, placing his bigger hand on top of hers. She gulped and whispered, "I can't help you, Sebastian. It's something you can't erase."

He smiled ruefully, but didn't open his eyes. "I know, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to ask. After all, you've probably seen this more times than I can count. Not only that, but you've been in danger…" His eyes snapped open, cold realization dawning upon them, and he intertwined his fingers with hers. "I can't believe all this time I've been so close to losing you and…" A guilty look crossed his face, but he quickly masked it.

Sakura chuckled softly, ignoring his suspicious expression, and ran her thumb delicately on his cheek. "I'm quite hard to kill, actually. You have no need to worry about me."

The heavy steps of a titan sounded too nearby for Sakura's comfort, and she stiffened in response, even if the titan wasn't going on their direction. Sebastian must've heard it too, because she also saw a primal fear shadow his eyes. She released his fingers and smiled apologetically at him. "Duty calls. I'll see you later."

She began to ran in the direction she heard the titan when a strong hand caught her wrist and pulled her back to him. She didn't even have the time to act surprised when she felt soft lips on her own, barely touching, and if she hadn't kept her eyes wide open throughout the whole experience, she would've never believed it was actually Sebastian.

He draw back after a couple of seconds and opened his glittering eyes, staring at her flushed cheeks and shocked expression with a combination of amusement and satisfaction. "It took me a near-death experience and a farewell to do this," he muttered to himself. "My patron called for me to come back inside Wall Sina. It seems our days of gallivanting are over, my dear."

Even though she knew this day would inevitably come, she still felt incredibly sad. She had always been attracted to the handsome musician, but she had thought her crush to be a passing thing. But she enjoyed that small kiss immensely, and she knew that her worry for him extended to something more than a simple friendship. Yet, both she and Sebastian knew that their relationship would've never worked, because he kept secrets from her, perhaps has lied to her, and she was a candidate to die every day.

Still, it was nice to daydream sometimes.

"We never finished translating that song, you know."

Sebastian chuckled and nodded along. "But I still remember the story quite well. It was about a farewell, correct?"

"And a betrayal," she added with a pointed look.

He had the decency to look slightly chastised. "I still really want to tell you, Sakura, but I can't. Don't worry, it has nothing to do with you."

She waved her hand in front of her dismissively. "There's no use in worrying about that. What's in the past is in the past. The good thing is that we had fun, no?"

"Yes, that we did. However, I'm still not sure my mission is over, so we might see each other again. Do promise me something, though."

"Sure."

He sighed, frowned, looked to the sides, and sighed again with an air of finality. "Please protect Amina. She cannot die."

Sebastian was sent from a patron inside Wall Sina on a "mission" which involved Sakura. Amina was from a wealthy family inside Wall Sina, one that had expressed her displeasure with her status as a soldier. "You've been watching over Amina this whole time for the Burgeis."

Sebastian shook his head, not at all perturbed that Sakura had figured it out. "Not for the Burgeis; for her father. He respects her decision and wants to stay away from her life, but at the same time wants to make sure his daughter is safe."

Now she was annoyed. All this time she thought it was some government plot or assassination mission he was on, but he was just acting as a relay for Amina's worrywart of a father. "You know, you could've just told me from the start instead of making this such a big thing. I seriously thought you wanted to kill one of us."

He grinned sheepishly. "I know, but I take my promises seriously, and Amina's father funded my entire career and took me in after Amina's birth. He asked me to speak to no one about this mission, and it would be a disservice if I failed him in some way."

"Like you did now?"

"Not really, because I'm sure now that you won't tell Amina."

Sakura reluctantly nodded. "That's true. But no need to tell me to protect her; I already do when I have the chance."

"I remember her as a brat of the court, but I'm glad she has such a good friend. I always wished to meet her, but she would've recognized me instantly. But alas, I'm sure there will be some other time. This is not a good-bye, after all."

"You sure know how to make everything dramatic."

He grinned and put on a silly theatrical face. "We will see each other again, my dear, and next time I will make you mine."

Sakura snorted and pushed him slightly. "Ha! That's funny. Nobody can own me, Sebastian."

"That's true, because beauty cannot be owned, only appreciated and cherished."

The kunoichi gaped at him and felt her cheeks warming against her will. She really wanted to wipe Sebastian's smug look from his face, and when he closed her open mouth gently with his index finger, the urge to smack him intensified. "You––"

"I believe you have a titan to hunt," he reminded her in a sing-song.

Sakura blinked and tried to sense the titan, only to find in her dismay that someone had already killed it because she could no longer feel it. Not that she would tell Sebastian this; she wouldn't be able to stand being around his infuriating (and exciting) presence any longer. She snarled her good-bye to mask her embarrassment and quickly sent her 3DMG hooks away from Sebastian, ignoring the peals of laughter that followed her.

At least she had made him laugh. It was the least she could do for someone who was becoming a survivor.

* * *

><p>The Survey Corps and Trainees were being housed in the Garrison castle located inside Wall Rose. Though she had to admire the stonework and large columns, she detested the darkness and lack of greenery. This was unlike the Survey Corps headquarters, which was out in the open and had various woods surrounding it for training purposes.<p>

Perhaps the part that frustrated her the most was her inability to find anyone. Everyone was on a run, trying to get supplies to the refugees or acting as a police force until the Garrison regained control over the situation or cleaning up. She didn't know where her squad was, or where her wards were, or even where her commander was. She had been assigned a small team of Garrison soldiers to look after meanwhile they killed titans, but they had disappeared soon after their mission was done because they had been intimidated by her presence.

So now she simply ambled in the hallways, trying to find something to do.

"Ackerman!" she heard a low-pitched female voice call her.

Sakura turned around and saw a shorter woman with chin-length platinum blonde hair and harsh gray eyes. She looked vaguely familiar, but she definitely did not know her name. "Yes?"

"Commander Pixis has summoned you to his office. I was asked to escort you there."

She raised a pink eyebrow, skeptical as to why a Garrison commander would want her, but nodded, motioning for the woman to lead. The Garrison soldier did without further prompting, foregoing any attempts at making a conversation or introducing herself. In some ways, the woman reminded Sakura of herself. She was obviously well-respected, because the lower-ranked Garrison soldiers saluted at her with a mixture of respect and pride. Earning respect was easy, but being someone else's pride was something even she had been unable to become in the Survey Corps.

Commander Pixis's office was far away from the quarters she had been assigned, and the way was quite complicated, with a mixture of sharp turns and going up in the staircases. The solider who was leading Sakura was well-acquainted with the path, walking as if it had been yet another day.

They reached a door, and the solider knocked harshly three times. "Commander Pixis! This is Rico Brzenska, bringing Sakura Ackerman as you requested."

"Come in," a scratchy voice commanded from behind the door. There were three chakra presences behind, and two she was very familiar with.

Rico swung the door open and stepped in without hesitation, forcing Sakura to do the same. The only person she had never seen before in her life was Commander Pixis, a bald man with amber eyes and crinkled face and gray mustache. He was much older than Commander Erwin, who sat in one of the chairs in front of his desk. In fact, next to the older commander, Erwin looked like a young man fresh out of the Trainees Corps. And then there was Levi, who seemed youngest of them all, but his gray eyes made it quite obvious he was nobody to be trifled with.

She saluted at the same time Rico did, though Sakura's salute was much less heartfelt. For some reason, she had a bad feeling about whatever was about to happen.

"Am I to be dismissed, Commander?"

Pixis's eyes hardened, and he shook his head. "No, stay here."

Rico relaxed, as if she had been expecting the answer, and went to stand beside the bookcase so that her presence wasn't as obvious. For some reason, Sakura felt as if she was the center of the show right now, so she remained in the middle of the bigger office. Both Erwin and Levi also shifted their chairs to the side so that they were able to see both Pixis and Sakura without craning their heads.

"My, you're quite the looker," Pixis drawled. Everyone in the room, except Rico, stiffened slightly at the comment. It seemed Rico was used to her eccentric commander more than the rest. "You sure you don't want to ditch the Survey Corps and come join me?"

She smiled sweetly and was about to give a very harsh rebuke when she saw Erwin's eyes flash slightly in horror and imperceptibly shake his head. Levi, however, looked quite entertained and did not seem to care about what she said. "No, Commander, I'm quite comfortable where I am. Thank you for the offer," she responded with the most pleasantly sarcastic voice she could manage.

Pixis barked a laugh, and Erwin visibly relaxed. "And a spitfire! But, I digress. This is not why you were summoned here. It has been brought to our attention that you and Eren Jaeger share a familial bond."

Now she knew she had to tread carefully. If the rumors were true, then Eren did have the ability to transform into a titan. However, no official source told her that, and claiming knowledge of his transformation could incriminate her and put her wards in danger. Shorter answers would work best. "Yes, we were adopted by the Jaegers six years ago."

"We?"

"My sister, Mikasa Ackerman, and I."

She saw Rico's eyes widen from her vantage point. "So you're her sister. You don't look like her at all." The kunoichi whipped her head to stare at Rico, whose eyes were suspicious. It was true, she didn't look like Mikasa at all, but luckily her birth certificate said otherwise about their parentage. Besides, why would it matter if Sakura had been adopted by the Ackermans?

"And why were you adopted?" Pixis continued, ignoring the admission.

Sakura bit the inside of her cheek and avoided looking at her own superior officers, focusing entirely on Pixis. Only Erwin and Levi would know if she was lying, and that did not serve to make her feel better about this whole situation. The interesting thing was that they were asking her all of this. Wasn't all the information on the files she had filled out? "My parents were killed in the beginning of spring in 844. Grisha Jaeger was our family doctor, and he took us in since we couldn't support ourselves."

"And what do you know about Eren Jaeger?"

Her eyes narrowed and she started to figure out what this whole meeting was about. They wanted to find reasons to persecute him! She already heard whispers of terror and suspicion for the titan-shifter, but she had been unable to do anything about it. She knew better than to try to convince people that something different wasn't a threat. Eren's situation was something Sakura had actively avoided her whole time in this world. It pained her greatly that a person she swore to protect was going through this. But she would be damned if she didn't help him.

"Eren is, and will always be, one of the greatest soldiers humanity has. Whether humanity deserves him or not is another question I do not know the answer to," she stated coldly, unflinchingly staring at Pixis, taunting him to say otherwise. She knew this could be considered as insubordination, but she had never been the perfect submissive soldier from the beginning.

Sakura saw Rico out of the corner of her eye stare at her in fury, but she ignored her. The kunoichi's fight was with Pixis, not with Rico.

The Garrison Commander also met her stare and then chuckled lowly. "Spitfire indeed." He cleared his throat and stood up, then crossed the room calmly. "Rico, let's go. I want a drink."

The blonde frowned slightly but followed after her commander, knowing better than to rebuke. Besides, when Pixis wanted a drink, he would stop at nothing to get it. They left the room together, leaving the Survey Corps officials alone with a very confused Sakura, who was now wondering what the entire point of the meeting had been about.

Erwin cleared his throat and smiled once he got Sakura's attention. "Well, that's good; Pixis trusts in our mission."

"What is this all about?" she finally asked, unable to be in the dark for very much longer.

Levi stood up and stretched his arms slightly. "Your little brother will have a military trial in a couple of days. He will either join the Survey Corps or be executed."

Her eyes widened and she clenched her fingers. "What?" she exclaimed. "Executed! What? Is everyone here mad? Eren just saved humanity!"

The Captain raised an eyebrow and even Erwin frowned. "You have faith in him because he's your brother, but to us he's a very real threat," Erwin explained calmly. "We have no idea if he can control his transformation. In fact, reports say he tried to harm your sister, Mikasa Ackerman. He may have saved humanity this one time, but we have no idea what will happen in the future."

Sakura bit her lip and resisted the urge to growl. Of course he wouldn't be able to control his power in the beginning! Even she had problems with chakra at times, and she had been using it for years! How dare they try to kill him for something that was out of his hands? Besides, he would never willingly hurt Mikasa. These people were refusing to understand. "You said he would be able to join the Survey Corps."

The blond sighed in relief and nodded. "There will be two sides in the trial. The Military Police want custody over Eren, will probably experiment on him first, then will definitely execute him. We want custody over him because he has expressed a need to exterminate titans."

"Quite the bloodthirsty brother you have there," Levi commented nonchalantly, crossing his arms and leaning against Pixis's desk. "His words during the Trost invasion didn't really make him sound as a sane person, and attacking his own comrades did not make anyone here trust him. In fact, we believe that it is very likely we will lose if the Wallists are there."

"We will lose?" Sakura whispered and felt her heart fall at that.

"If we rely on hard logic, then yes, we will definitely lose. The people feel threatened in their own homes and will resort to executing a child if it makes them feel better," Erwin explained. "But we're of the belief that Eren may be useful for humanity, and it would be a waste to kill him without gauging his potential."

"He's not a weapon," Sakura said with a barely restrained voice.

Levi cocked his head to the side and coldly said, "If he wants to live, he'll have to become one."

Sakura gritted her teeth and looked at the side, refusing to meet her superiors' gazes; looking at them any longer and she might snap, and it wouldn't help Eren's cause if his older adopted sister was revealed to be a murderous ninja. But she would run away with them, of that she was sure. "Why am I here, then?" she bit out, changing the topic of the conversation and of her mind.

"Two reasons. First, Pixis wanted to meet you to make sure his decision to leave Eren up to the hands of the Military Police or the Survey Corps was the best one. He has no interest in Eren, but he could've cast his lot with the Military Police, and that would've been disastrous. He just wanted to see what kind of person Eren Jaeger was in the eyes of his older sister."

Even though he was doing everything to avoid Eren's death, she still refused to meet his gaze. She felt _so _angry, so upset at everyone, that she didn't want one of the people she admired the most to see her in such a state. And Levi… Well, he had already seen so many different facets of her personality that she oddly felt comfortable with acting so violently around him.

"Second, I respect you enough to give you a warning," Erwin said, causing Sakura to look at him in surprise. "If Eren proves to be as hotheaded as he was during the Battle of Trost, he will say something that will only end up hurting his chances of survival. He might have to be leashed in if we want to win the trial."

The kunoichi blinked and frowned in confusion. "I don't follow."

"If your little brother proves to be stupid and a loudmouth like you, I'll have to beat him up to show the world that he can be tamed, like an animal," Levi explained, every word becoming colder and more threatening. "If words and logic can't sway people, violence will. That's what I believe, at least."

"And I agree with Levi's view," Erwin continued carefully, making sure to not agitate Sakura any further. She seemed as if she wanted to throttle Levi, and that wasn't good for their partner chemistry, one that had taken Levi a long time to establish. "I am asking him to do a difficult thing, Sakura. It is not our favorite past time to beat a child, believe us. Even if people think he might transform and destroy us."

Her eyes narrowed further, as if really considering murdering one of them before she sighed and hung her head down. "Will this save him?" she whispered, more vulnerable than either men had ever heard her before.

Erwin and Levi shared a look, and the blond nodded to his long-time comrade and friend. Levi resisted the urge to scowl at Erwin, but he went to stand next to Sakura and put a rough hand on her shoulder. He must've caught her by surprise, because she jumped slightly and looked up to him in astonishment.

"I promise I won't let Jaeger die from the trial. I also will not go overboard with him if I can help it."

The kunoichi's shocked face melted to a warm smile directed at both of them. Erwin reflexively returned it, glad that one of his most important soldiers was comfortable with such a brutal arrangement, but Levi had a harder time processing the fact that Sakura did not want to kill him as slowly as possible.

He dropped his hand from her shoulder and she saluted at them, dismissing herself without their approval. They were already used to it, and, besides, almost every Survey Corps soldier had their own quirks unique to their dynamic.

Once the door closed and Sakura was gone, Erwin shot Levi a knowing look and mocked, "Not go overboard, huh?"

Levi growled. "Shut up. Beating a little boy almost half my age doesn't make my blood sing, you know."

The blond commander laughed and patted the shorter man's back, much to his annoyance. "True, true. I'm glad we agree on that one."

* * *

><p>In the end, Sakura had been invited to witness the trial tomorrow, since she was a higher ranked member of the Survey Corps, and for that she was slightly nervous. It was one thing to know Eren could be possibly beaten up as a humiliating act by her Captain, and it was another thing to actually <em>watch <em>it happen in front of her. She wanted to warn Mikasa, whose protectiveness over Eren put hers to shame, but she had been impossible to locate throughout the whole time she was there.

But she had found the boys of her team. Petra was still absent, but having Olou, Gunther, and Eld around made her feel much better. Together they watched over the Trainees, helping the survivors cope with what they saw as well as what the future held for them. She wasn't sure why her teammates were doing this, but from her part, these had been her wards' classmates. Most look around the age, as well. It tugged her heartstrings to see youth so destroyed.

One of the trainees sat alone in the perimeter of the castle's courtyard. Most of the trainees chose to mingle in the middle of the dirt courtyard, talking to their comrades and friends, but this boy had decided to sit by himself, his legs drawn to his chest and his chin resting on top of his knees. Sakura looked around her, trying to see if anyone noticed the boy. The trainees were too absorbed in their own grief meanwhile the few soldiers who had decided to help out had their hands full talking to the other young soldiers.

Sakura smiled at the short, bald boy she had been talking to. "Connie, do you know who is sitting there?"

Connie cocked his head to the side and followed Sakura's line of sight. Once he found the boy, a pronounced frown appeared on his face and he shook his head slightly. "That's Jean. I have a feeling he wants to be alone."

"Nonsense. Nobody advances in life alone."

Springer obviously didn't agree, but his eyes lit up as if he remembered something. "Oh, yes, Miss Sakura! There's something I've been meaning to ask."

The kunoichi giggled and waved her hand dismissively. "Don't call me Miss. You've earned my respects, Connie. But go ahead, what is it?"

"You're with the Survey Corps, right? Would you… I mean, after everything I saw, I would want to run away and never see a titan ever again, but… Jean yesterday said he was joining you guys, and it got me thinking. Could I do that, too?"

"Hmm, I'm afraid I don't understand why you're asking me this question, Connie. You're the one who should know your own limits."

Connie bit his lip and crossed his arms, his body language much more tense. "I don't know my limits compared to a person of the Survey Corps. I mean, you guys just go out there every month and actually see them face to face more than any other person alive."

"You graduated eighth, right?" At his nod, she continued, "You're in much better shape than most of the recruits. Not only that, but you're aware of your own limits. Many deaths happen because people forget themselves. Out there, you feel like a hunter, but the roles can change very quickly if you're not careful."

"Will you and the other guys look after the recruits?"

"No, I'm not a Squad Leader. But we'll see each other more often than not. We're a tight-knit group."

Connie grinned, his hazel eyes bright and much less clouded. She knew that he still had his own monsters to face, but she had done something for him in a short time.

A girl with brown hair in a high ponytail and twinkling golden eyes laughed and called, "Connie! Let's go explore the castle!"

The trainee grinned and nodded at the girl. "Thank you so much, Sakura," he said before he ran off after the girl. It made her much happier to see that he was in much better spirits.

She felt Olou's chakra approach her and he unceremoniously put his elbow on her shoulder. "You make a comfortable elbow-rest, Pinky."

"What are you doing here, old man?"

"Just wanted to talk to you about the boy you were with. Sasha was fond of him."

"Sasha?"

"The girl who wanted to explore the castle with him."

Sakura grinned mischievously at him. "Wow, you leave Petra for the younger girl just like that. I never pegged you for a pervert, old man."

Olou immediately retrieved his elbow and shot her a nasty glare. "You're disgusting."

She laughed. "And you're so easy to tease."

"But seriously, Sakura, are you okay?"

She bit her lip and feigned an innocent look. "What are you talking about?"

He scowled at her. "Seriously? We all know your kid brother will go on a trial tomorrow. Eren Jaeger, right?"

She had hoped to avoid the subject, preferring to bury herself in other people's problems other than her own. She just hadn't expected Olou to be so blunt about it, but she should've known better. "I trust Commander Erwin and Captain Levi. There's nothing more I can do. It's not like I can convince everybody that he's not a threat."

"Damn right you can't. I know that your feelings are clouding your judgement, but you must understand that this is not an easy decision. He's our enemy and not at the same time."

"He's always dreamed of joining the Survey Corps. He's admired Commander Erwin and Captain Levi, especially, for the longest time. Not only that, but I can't sense him as a titan; he's human. You can't tell me someone like that is an enemy to humanity."

He shook his head slowly. "No, he wouldn't be, if I knew him. Not only that, but you haven't lived with him in five years, right? How do you know that the Eren Jaeger you knew is the same one who's going on trial tomorrow?"

She didn't know, he was right, but she believed in him. She believed in the sincerity of his thirst for vengeance; nobody could fake that wrath and bloodlust. Of course, she wouldn't tell anyone this; people already thought him a monster, no use in adding fuel to that fire. She would just have to keep her faith to herself.

"Now that you're here, though, mind coming with me to talk to that kid?" She pointed at Jean, who still looked as dejected and upset as he had during her entire conversation with Connie.

He sighed at the obvious change of conversation, but went along with it. Everyone knew that Sakura was stubborn with things like this. "Moody kid? Nah, Eld and I tried to approach him and he just didn't respond."

Sakura sighed and gave him an unamused stare. "What did you tell him?"

"Nothing!" he replied, raising his hands at her accusing tone. "Why do you always assume that?"

"Because you're all knuckleheads. You and Eld and Gunther. Perhaps what Jean needs is more feminine understanding."

The taller soldier snorted and gave her a silly smirk. "You, feminine? Ha! Have you seen how you eat? I've seen pigs with more manners."

Sakura felt her jaw tick and she took in a deep breath. "Fine, you don't believe me? Let's bet."

"You're making a bet on the emotional stability of a child?"

"Yes. Now are you game or a coward?"

His smirk remained and he nodded. "If you fail to make him smile, you have to agree with whatever I say, regardless of what I'm saying or to whom I'm saying it."

Oh, that was sneaky. Most of her banter with Olou relied on making him seem foolish, but losing this bet would take that away from her. "Fine, but if I do make him smile, then you have to confess to Petra before our next expedition."

His eyes widened and his brow furrowed. "Confess to Petra? Isn't that a little too… Extreme?"

"Take it or leave it."

His frown deepened, and he went from staring at Jean, then at Sakura, then back at Jean, before he finally nodded, as if he had convinced himself that Sakura would never get the smile out of him. "Fine, I accept. But I hope you're feeling bad over using that kid's grief as betting material."

"This just gives me the incentive to make it happen. Now, if you'll excuse me."

Sakura turned around and headed towards Jean, making sure to make her steps loud enough for him to hear. His eyes shifted slightly to her, but did not make a comment or show an outward acknowledgement of her presence when she sat down next to him and leaned against the stone walls.

He did not talk and she waited for him to become more conformable with her being next to me. She knew some people had a larger personal space bubble and then others completely disregarded the concept of distance. Luckily, she had an average bubble and had good sense of how at ease people were around her.

Jean, though his shoulders were taut, had not asked her to leave, so she would take that as permission for her to stay.

"You're Jean, right?" she asked amicably, still not looking at him. Just like she had expected, he didn't answer. "I'm assuming you battled in Trost, right? You have the eyes of someone who has seen death." He didn't talk, or look at her, or make any sound; he sat there, eerily still, with his knees drawn up to his chin. "It's not easy, and it doesn't get any better. The first time I saw a titan… It was five years ago, during the Fall of Shiganshina." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jean visibly relax and his head move slightly to her side, letting her know he was listening. "We were terrified. By we I mean–– Why, you must know them. I'm Sakura Ackerman, Mikasa's older sister."

Now Jean snapped out of his stupor and stared at her with wide eyes. "You're Mikasa's sister? You look nothing alike."

She giggled, trying to mask the tension that observation always gave her. "We get that a lot."

"Does that mean you're also Jaeger's older sister?"

The way he said Eren's last name made her arch an eyebrow. "Adopted sister, but yes. I take it you don't like him a lot."

"He's crazy," he breathed, but she could detect the undertone of admiration. "Ever since we started, he's always been spouting things that he's going to exterminate the titans and join the Survey Corps. Nobody ever believed him, of course, the extermination part, but he rose the ranks. A lot of people look up to him. And now it turns out he's a threat to all of us."

She stiffened and breathed in deeply. Hearing other people call her younger brother a threat did not make her feel good. In her eyes, she still saw the boy who had been so excited to receive the stolen Survey Corps cloak she had given him as a present. Sure, he was bloodthirsty, but at least he was handling his anger in some way. She exhaled, "I guess."

Jean gave her a confused look until he frowned. "You don't think so, right?"

"No."

"His trial is tomorrow, right? I've known Eren for the last three years, and I'm still scared of him. I don't think people will be so understanding."

Sakura shivered slightly. Though she had come here to help the Trainees out, she had also come to distract herself from the trial with other people's problems. "I must trust in my superiors. Luckily, military tribunals are different than the civilian courts. If not, Eren would've definitely been doomed."

"It's his temper that gets him in trouble."

"Something tells me your temper also gets you in trouble."

He smiled sheepishly, and though Sakura knew she had won the bet, she felt genuinely happy to momentarily erase that dejected look. "Guilty. It's different than Eren's, but I guess it's the same."

"You joining the Survey Corps like him?"

"Yeah. Yesterday I made the decision. It feels surreal. I've always wanted to join the Military Police, me and Marco, but it didn't work out."

The way he said his friend's name clued her in to what happened to make him so depressed, so she wisely avoided the subject. "Sometimes life makes us choose paths we had previously thought impossible. I never wanted to join the military, for example."

"Why not?"

"I've always felt it was my duty to protect Mikasa, Eren, and Armin from the cruelties of the world. Going away for three years did not really fit in my plan for that."

"And you joined the Survey Corps, the most dangerous one of them all," he said, eyeing the Wings of Freedom on her jacket.

"Mmm, yeah, I did. But I don't regret it. At first I did, and I felt angry at all the things that made me take that decision, but in the end we can either spend our lives angry at our fate or we can live with the cards we've been dealt with."

Jean nodded, processing his words, before his features were overcome with a curious look. "Not that I don't appreciate it, but why are you telling me this?"

"I remember I felt guilty for a long time, mostly because I thought I was a monster to survive. I guess I understand that sometimes you need somebody to tell you it's okay to live, or to laugh, or to love. And then sometimes it feels better knowing that you're not the only one who feels guilty."

Though Sakura was looking ahead at the courtyard, she could feel Jean's intense stare on her face. Only survivors could understand what was going on. Eld, Gunther, Olou… They were survivors in a different sense. They had signed up for the Survey Corps and understood what that entailed. She, however, had not signed up to witness the Fall of Shiganshina. Jean and the rest of the 104th Trainees' Squad hadn't signed up to fight in the Battle of Trost. Jean wanted to get as far away from the titans as possible, if his previous plan was to join the Military Police. Surviving unexpected events was always much more taxing, because nobody was mentally prepared to what happened.

"Thank you," Jean whispered. "I felt like a fool for the longest time in choosing the Survey Corps, but if people like you join, then I made the right decision."

Sakura felt something warm inside spreading from her chest to her fingertips. She had been clued in a bit with Connie, but her conversation with Jean reinforced it: she liked helping other people out, or at least people she didn't owe anything to. Maybe other people had realized this before she did, but it felt good to know that being a ninja did not mean thinking coldheartedly.

She stood up and patted his shoulder. "We'll be delighted to have you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to spend the rest of the day worrying about Eren."

"Good luck."

"...Thank you."

* * *

><p>Only a select few members of the Survey Corps had been chosen to watch the trial, and every single member of Squad Levi was going to be in attendance. The trial would start at nine in the morning, but they were already heading down there at eight in the morning. Erwin wanted to get acquainted with the environment, see where every important person would be sitting to make the best impression when he finally started speaking.<p>

The corridor leading to the court room was quite beautiful, with a marble floor and various paintings of different events in their one hundred years behind the walls. There were some paintings that predated that time as well, but Sakura didn't know enough to be able to pinpoint what they were about. The only one she recognized was a painting of what seemed like a debate between a sword-wielding Warrior Maria and haloed Merciful Rose over the life of a man on his knees.

Erwin, who was leading their entourage, suddenly came to a stop. "Continue without me," he commanded, watching everyone cautiously.

The soldiers followed his order without a second of doubt, but when Sakura was about to pass him he grabbed her shoulder gently, making her stop. "Commander?"

"How many people outside the Survey Corps know of your ability to sense titans?" he asked in a hushed tone, his shoulders taut and his blue eyes intense.

Sakura frowned and answered truthfully, "Armin Arlert, Mikasa Ackerman, and Eren Jaeger know from my very own mouth. If someone else knows––"

"I've made sure that nobody outside the Survey Corps knows, don't worry," he interrupted. "Do you think they might say anything about it during the trial?"

"No."

He let go of her arm, visibly relaxed. He must've sensed her alarm, because he offered her a small smile. "I'm sure I've told you already, but I've kept your gift a secret from my superiors and peers," he whispered lowly so that nobody but her would listen. "It would look bad in court if the Survey Corps proved unworthy of telling the truth if we want custody over Eren."

"Commander, if you don't mind my asking, why didn't you tell them? It's not bad, right?"

"If there is something I've learned in my life is that the less people you trust with secrets, the safer you are. Eren is now in grave danger because his secret is known to the whole public. Mind you, not that I'm against knowing, but Eren would be much better off if nobody knew of his ability."

She never really cared much about the inner politics of the military or the royal government, but now that these politics played a heavy role in Eren's life, she couldn't help but share Erwin's mistrust of the people they were surrounded. "I see," she murmured unhappily.

"We better get going. No need to make our own comrades suspicious."

And with that he started walking away. Sakura made sure to follow at a respectable distance, her own thoughts dominating her mind. So Erwin didn't trust his superiors? Just what was going on in this world? Was Eren the only titan-shifter, or were there others?

But perhaps the biggest question on her mind was when. She had searched her memories for answers, for a moment in which Eren could have gained titan-shifting abilities. Was he born with it? Then Kalura and Grisha… Were they the enemy or friends of humanity? She didn't want to think they would plot to destroy the walls, but what was she supposed to think?

She entered the trial room and quickly went to in between Petra and Eld, who were behind Captain Levi and Commander Erwin. Her teammates offered her a comforting smile but they soon averted gazes, knowing that right now was not the time to talk. Besides, it was a bit awkward since they had already expressed their discomfort and distrust of Eren, even if he was her little brother. Familial bonds meant nothing when safety was involved, after all, but she still couldn't help but feel a little hurt that they wouldn't trust in her judgement.

People started filing in, and before she knew it, all the seats had been taken. Mikasa and Armin sat on her side of the court, but they couldn't verbally acknowledge each other in such a stifling environment. She only nodded inconspicuously at them and they smiled slightly, then quickly went to stand next to Rico and the Garrison soldiers.

The only people missing that she noticed was Zackly, Eren, Hange, and Mike. The rest, all of the civilians and important soldiers from all the branches, were present and murmuring amongst themselves, waiting for the trial to start.

The door suddenly burst open and in came a handcuffed Eren, prompted to move along by the gun of a Military Police soldier. Sakura didn't even know how tense she was until Petra took her hand and gave her a comforting squeeze. She took in a deep breath, squeezed back, then dropped her hand once she had reined in her temper.

Eren was forced to sit on the floor and a huge metal bar was implanted between his chains to restrict his movement.

Zackly chose that moment to come in, and a reverent silence spread throughout the room the moment he sat down on his seat. Sakura could sense he wielded great power. He was not a man to be trifled with. "Eren Jaeger?"

"Yes, sir?" Sakura's heart broke a bit at how small he sounded.

"This military tribunal will decide your fate, not a civilian court. I will now hear both sides of the argument."

The Military Police Commander, Nile Dok, presented his case, arguing that Eren's life was a threat to them all because of the wild nature of his powers and the possibility of a civil war because of his existence. He basically called for Eren's sacrifice in the name of humanity, and each word he spoke made the crowd more agitated and more in his favor. Erwin had been right; logic would not win the fight. These people wanted to kill what they did not understand, uncaring that they were calling for the death of a boy.

No, maybe Eren was not a boy. She had made the mistake of calling Connie and Jean boys as well. They were grownups. They had seen and felt things many adults had not. Maybe it was a disservice to regard them as boys any more. They were soldiers now, and they had to be treated like soldiers.

After Nile Dok was done with his case, one of the Wallists priest started condemning Eren, and something inside Sakura started snapping with each word he said. Petra took her hand once again and gave her a big squeeze of comfort, which relaxed her immediately and caused her to exhale. There was nothing she could do at the moment anyway.

Zackly, however, could do something, and asked the priest to shut up. He then prompted Erwin to begin his argument, which the blond captain did without waiting any further. The plan was exactly what they had told her two days ago, about how they wanted Eren to be a part of his force. From the tone of his voice and the atmosphere in the Survey Corps's box, Sakura knew that she was the only Survey Corps member who truly trusted Eren. In their hearts, they probably agreed with what Nile Dok said, much to her sadness.

But the difference was that: their hearts agreed with Nile Dok. Their minds trusted in Commander Erwin's words and logic. How they felt did not influence how they acted, and for that she felt a swell of pride for her military branch. It was hard to accept something you feared, but she knew they were willing to try.

Merchants started trying to present their own view, but just like the Wallist, they were promptly shut down by none other than the Survey Corps themselves. She had to admit she was slightly surprised when Levi spoke so harshly to the merchant man, but then again she had been on the receiving end of such talks before, so maybe she shouldn't have been so surprised.

Zackly, however, was becoming more and more convinced of something, but Sakura was unsure about what. He picked up some papers and addressed Eren with grave eyes. "In my hands I have the reports of Trost's defenses. 'Immediately after transforming into a titan, he swung his fist at Mikasa Ackerman.' Is Mikasa Ackerman here?"

Eren whipped his head to stare at his adopted sister, a horrified look on his face, meanwhile Mikasa stiffened and glared at Rico. This didn't bode well for Eren's fate, but Sakura had already known that his attempt on Mikasa's life was going to be brought up.

"Yes, that's me," Mikasa spoke up, a bit higher-pitched than usual.

"Is it true that Eren Jaeger attempted to attack you as a titan?"

She was quiet, and Sakura started becoming more aware of every face in the trial. They weren't winning. People stared at Eren with fear and hatred. A soldier who attacked his own comrades was branded a traitor, and with good reason. But none of them had any idea of what it meant to be gifted with power and not know how to use it. Eren needed training, not death, but the people were too scared to see that.

Mikasa said in a calm tone, "Yes, it's true."

Most of the people in the trial gasped and started chattering amongst themselves. Even though Sakura couldn't quite listen in to the whole conversations, she heard the word "monster" and "threat" more times than necessary. Petra squeezed her hand again, but Sakura was too far gone to return the comfort. And Eren… Oh she would definitely go to him as soon as the trial was over.

"But, he also defended me on two separate occasions," Mikasa continued, undaunted by the mood of the crowd. "The first time was shortly after his titan transformation, where he killed a titan who was about to kill me. The second time he saved Armin Arlert and me from a HE shell. I would like these two facts considered as well."

Sakura sighed in relief and smiled, only for her heart to drop when Nile Dok said, "I object! I believe these two instances are clouded by her personal feelings. When Mikasa Ackerman was younger, she was taken in by the Jaeger household. Furthermore, our investigations have concluded that Eren Jaeger and Mikasa Ackerman killed the three robbers who tried to kidnap her when they were only nine."

The crowd started muttering amongst themselves again, and Sakura yanked her hand from Petra's grasp and clenched both hands at her side. How dare he bring up their past? Eren had saved his little sister! "You forgot the part where these three robbers murdered our parents in front of Mikasa's eyes, Commander Dok," Sakura spoke up, her voice calm though her body was heated, and the crowd quietened. She had spoken out of turn, but neither Zackly nor Erwin looked offended or upset at her. "Better tell the full story if you're accusing someone else of having a clouded judgement."

Nile Dok and the rest of the Military Police glared at her, angry that the Commander had lost his momentum on the crowd. "Even if it is was done out of self-defense, I still question their humanity. Children should be incapable of murder, yet they prove this wrong. Is it wise from us to trust humanity's fate, our lives, our future on Eren Jaeger?"

The crowd started muttering again, and Sakura's anger grew. People only heard what they wanted to hear, after all. Luckily, Zackly did not look as if he was being swayed heavily by the state of the crowd. He was someone who understood just exactly was at stake in here.

"So is she!" one of the merchants yelled, pointing at Mikasa. "Do we know she's a human?"

Sakura's eyes widened and she opened her mouth, but Erwin looked back at her and shot her a warning glance to remain quiet.

"You're right!" another person said. "We should dissect her just to be sure!"

The kunoichi's mouth curled and she murmured to herself, "I'll kill all of you before you get a chance."

Even though she had spoken quietly, Petra took her fisted hand in hers again and started running her thumb soothingly along her knuckles meanwhile Eren fought for Mikasa's sake, even if this just made them more convinced about their previous convictions. She really wished Eren would simply shut up and stop fighting for no reason. Zackly wouldn't condemn Mikasa, at least not now, and all Eren was doing was prove that he was a hothead and had no control of his emotions, which was exactly the angle the Military Police was going for. She could see the satisfaction in Dok's face every time Eren opened his mouth, because it just served to prove his point of view right.

And then Eren completely lost his cool and moved his shackles more than any normal human being would, which alarmed everyone in the court room. And then he started speaking, and each word Eren said just dug his grave deeper. He was right, Sakura had to admit; they were being cowards by wasting the means to do something and win against the titans, but nobody was stupid enough to say that in a court room that would decide his fate, especially if the odds were stacked against him.

Rhetoric did not rely on truth, but in the sway of the masses.

He finally yelled, "Shut up and bet everything on me!" His chains moved even more and the steam she had seen in so many titan corpses started emanating from him.

Erwin and Levi looked at each other and Erwin nodded at his second-in-command. Nile Dok stared at Eren with true fear and ordered one of his soldiers to point the rifle at Eren, much everyone's surprise. Everyone was so engrossed in the rifle and the titan-shifter that nobody noticed Levi leave his place next to Erwin and land a kick on Eren's face.

Sakura closed her eyes and shivered with every grunt Eren gave. She knew it had to happen, that her little brother had screwed up and needed this to survive, but it did not make it any easier. Petra still held on to her now limp hand, and she felt Eld put a soothing hand on her back. It was moments like this that she was really grateful about her team. Even if they were scared of Eren, they understood her pain. And even if they had their doubts about her little brother, they still stood by Erwin and his decision.

"It is my personal opinion that violence is the best way to train someone," Levi said in a calm voice. A few seconds passed, but she didn't hear any more grunts or kicks, so she finally opened her eyes. The crowd was shocked, even Nile Dok looked horrified, and Levi had his foot on the back of Eren's head, forcing him to lay on the ground like an obedient dog. "He needs to be trained like an animal, not a man."

"Levi," Nile Dok said with a great degree of hesitance. "He might turn into a titan if you keep taunting him!"

The Captain leaned next to Eren and picked up his face for the world to see. He was bruised, disorientated, and blood was flowing freely from his broken nose. It sure made an impression on someone who had never seen violence in her life. "And you want to dissect him, correct?" The people finally realized how foolish they had sounded and started muttering amongst themselves. "Nobody really knows the extent of his power, and that's a danger." He kicked Eren on the ribs and let go of his head, causing Eren to collapse again on the white floor. "He's no match for me, though. There is no titan I cannot kill. But all of you… Do you really have the skill to kill him?"

By now she was squeezing Petra's hand so hard she was sure she had cut off her circulation, but she continued to run soothing circles on the back of her hand.

Erwin raised his hand and firmly said, "I have a proposal, sir."

Zackly looked at the blond tiredly and replied, "What is it?"

"Eren is a danger because we don't know for sure the extent of his abilities. Therefore, I propose to have Captain Levi take responsibility for Eren and go on an expedition beyond the walls."

"With Eren?"

"Yes. Based on this expedition, I would like you to judge whether Eren is able to control his power and whether he is the bane or salvation of humanity."

"Can you do it, Levi? Can you control Eren Jaeger?"

Levi looked around to stare at Zackly. There was no compassion on his face. "I'm certain I can kill him, but I cannot promise that I am able to keep him alive." The Captain looked at the side, staring at Sakura and gauging her reaction. In that area, he had lied; he could kill Eren, but the question was: would Sakura let him?

"Then my decision is made."

* * *

><p><strong>God, this chapter is the longest one yet. Really, Eren is such an idiot in the trial, both in the manga and in this story. And before you start clamoring, this is still LeviSaku as it's main pairing; I just never said when.<strong>

**I would like to thank Guest, FairiesDescent, Basia Orci, Tainted Heroine, Strife666 (wow, thanks for reviewing every chapter; you're extra awesome), anima, AmeRaSora, IKAF-lazy, Guest, Dixie Chic, thentherewasIA, flevantein, catxangel, mun3litKnight, Sivren, dark-wolf-howl, Eien no Ajisai, Imnotcreative, cherryblossom1423, CloudMonkey, aniqa, Dyz, Love Remedy, nakamura1miu, SakuMulti, KuroAka, and aj07to for being so awesome and leaving reviews.**

**As for your questions, **aj07to, for the horses I know that the walls have a couple of elevators installed and they use it to get over the walls, as seen in the manga. As for the rest... Quite frankly I think the rivers would just slow them down. They don't really need the rivers when they can run on the open fields, and once they're in there's not much that can be done to stop them.****


	14. Mission

**The wonderful lucife56 drew some fantastic fan art of Sakura in her Survey Corps glory. The link is in my profile. Make sure to leave some love if you're able to!**

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><p><em>He hadn't been very specific in what they would be doing, but she was smart enough to know she shouldn't show up in work clothes. She put on her regular shinobi pants and chuunin jacket on top of her long sleeved shirt. Summer had given way to fall, and she wasn't about to wear a skirt and regular shirt when the weather was chilly enough to give her goosebumps on a warm day. <em>

_Sakura was a bit nervous to leave her house, and it apparently became very obvious to her dad that she wasn't going to work at the hospital because of her attire and mental state. If she told him that she was leaving to receive lessons from Uchiha Itachi, he would never let her walk outside. Even if he had been been pardoned for the Uchiha Massacre and it was well-known that he had done it to save Konoha, the majority of the general populace were still very wary of the man who could agree to murder his own family of superb shinobi for the sake of a village. Only Sakura and a handful of shinobi even dared to speak with him. Suffice to say he had become the village's pariah, a role he took very seriously._

_"I'm just going to train for a little bit," she responded a bit stiffly, making sure to keep a normal amount of eye contact._

_Her father blinked twice. "Train? With Tsunade-sama?"_

_"No. With me," a smooth baritone said from inside the house, and a man with messy platinum hair and steely blue eyes turned to the hallway leading to the door. He was already dressed in the regular jounin attire, his forehead protector shining brightly around his bicep._

_Now it was Sakura's turn to be very surprised, but it quickly led way to wariness. Why would Suguru want to come train with her? There was something more he wanted, no doubt. The question was what. Her older brother had never been interested in what she did. It was hard to be interested in the comings and goings of a sibling twelve years younger._

_He came to stand next to her and looked at her expectantly, arching an elegant brow. God did she hate it when he did that. "Well? Are we going or not?"_

_Sakura put on her best fake smile and waved at her dad enthusiastically. "Yup! I won't be back for dinner so tell Kaa-san not to make anything."_

_They were both out the door before their father could even formulate a reply. If there was something weirder than Sakura dressing for training on a work day, it was _Suguru _coming to train with her. Not only was he a powerful jounin, but he had recently taken a genin team of his own. It had only taken Tsunade a very serious threat of giving him C-Rank missions for a year for him to accept the role of a sensei._

_Never in her wildest dreams had she envisioned walking down the crowded Konoha streets with her older brother in tow. She risked a sideways glance at him, and she was surprised to see him with a smooth face, seemingly enjoying the beautiful autumn breeze and sunlight. All of Sakura's memories of her brother, which were few considering he spent most of his teens on dangerous missions, always had him sporting a scowl or an emotionless face. One time, when she was six, she had asked Suguru why he didn't smile when he came home, and he calmly answered that there was nothing to smile about once anyone saw the world for what it was. Even if she didn't understand what he meant, she was old enough to know that her brother was unhappy._

_"What do you want, nii-san?" Sakura asked quietly after heavy minutes of silence._

_He huffed a short laugh. "Those lessons with Hokage-sama sure have made you more confident. Remember when you used to hide in your room when I came home?"_

_She sighed in exasperation, but decided to play along. Suguru would only answer questions when he wanted to, and she didn't want to argue at the moment. "Because you were covered in the blood of your enemies."_

_Suguru hummed in agreement, a whimsical smile etched on his face. Now that was even rarer than a non-frowning Suguru: a smiling one. Maybe this was one of his moods? Sakura wasn't very sure if she preferred him brooding or him being weird. "I did make quite the impression on you when you were younger, right?"_

_They were walking in the general direction of the training fields, and Sakura always left one hour earlier to her appointments, so at least she wasn't in any hurry. But if he got any weirder she would have no qualms in leaving him. "Nii-san, I barely saw you when I was a girl. Now, what do you want? You know I wasn't lying about training."_

_"True, you're going training. You just didn't tell Otou-san you were training with Uchiha Itachi."_

_Sakura scowled at him, but he pointedly avoided looking at him. "How do you know that?"_

_"You're not the only one Uchiha Itachi offered to help with training."_

_Sakura raked her brain for any person who might've accepted an offer from _the _Uchiha Itachi to train and almost came up short until a growl let her mouth. "Kakashi."_

_"Indeed. It seems the Mangekyou training has been doing wonders for him and he let it slip last night that he was taking _Sakura-chan_ as his pupil. Which makes me wonder, just what did you do to make him interested?"_

_Her previous wariness at her brother quickly evaporated as a flash of hot anger coursed through her veins. "Look, I know you're the perfect child any parent could've ever wanted and I've been the fuck up until now, but don't think for a second I'm incapable of seeking opportunities and achieving things."_

_Suguru came to a stop next to her and stared at her with wide blue eyes. Perhaps today was a day of many firsts, because she had never seen him so surprised before, ever. He shook his head slowly and started walking again, joining her and continuing on their way to the training fields. "No, you misunderstand me, Sakura. I didn't mean it like that, though I can see where you would get such a sentiment. I haven't been the best brother, have I?"_

_"Nii-san, now's not the time to go down memory lane. You already know I have a lesson with Uchiha-san. He's willing to teach me about water chakra manipulation, and I'm not about to miss that opportunity, considering Tou-san can't help me out." When starting nature manipulation, it was best to get pointers from another person who had the same nature manipulation. Suguru had their mother's as a primary affinity wind chakra, and she preferred their father's water chakra. He just wasn't a very good teacher, and quickly lost his temper with her. "So tell me what's on your mind."_

_"I'm just asking what happened to you to make Uchiha Itachi interested in you. He never takes someone unless he feels indebted to them."_

_Sakura refrained from answering his question until they reached the first training field. Not that Suguru minded about her choice; they both preferred quiet places for their serious talks._

_"His brother almost murdered me. Does that answer your question?"_

_Suguru's killing intent spiked a bit, but he wasn't aiming it at anyone in particular, making it a bit more awkward for her to be around. "When was this?" he asked quietly._

_"Like a year ago, give or take a few months."_

_"And I wasn't told of this because?"_

_"You never asked and everyone assumed you didn't care. Oh, and I don't like talking about how my teammate almost killed me in cold blood and I needed Naruto to defend me because I was so in love with him I was willing to let him kill me."_

_Suguru breathed in and shakily exhaled. "Dammit, Sakura, you're my sister. I deserve to know when you're in danger."_

_"You've been on non-stop missions for the past ten years, Nii-san. This is the longest you've been in Konoha, and you've only been here for two weeks. And it's not a dinner topic, exactly... Whenever you visit us for dinner, that is."_

_"And you're still trying to defend not telling me about this? Or Otou-san and Okaa-san conveniently forgetting to tell me? Even Kakashi has done stupendously."_

_Sakura sighed and rubbed her own arm, feeling a bit cold all of the sudden. She could sympathize a bit with his anger at being left in the dark for the past year and a half, and admittedly she hadn't told him in the best way possible. "I told them not to tell you, so don't blame them."_

_A wave of hurt passed through his eyes until the anger came back to beat it back. "Why? Why would you be so unfair? You were always the warm one, the honest one. What happened?"_

_"I'm entitled to my secrets just as you are, Nii-san," she bit back. "You never talk about your missions. God knows how many times you've been in danger, but I've never demanded any names or to know what happens because it's your life and you choose how to live it. I'm a kunoichi now, and a damn good one. I can make my own decisions and I don't live in your damned shadow anymore."_

_Suguru looked ready to shoot back another barbed comment until an inexplicable wave of sadness washed over his face, leaving him oddly vulnerable. "I really did screw up, didn't I? And here I wondered why you never did well in the Academy, why you were so easy for that Yamanaka girl to befriend you and manipulate you."_

_Sakura rolled her eyes and looked away, trying to ignore how his words were opening up old wounds she could've sworn she had buried deep inside her heart. Trust Suguru to dig them up in a twenty minute conversation. "Don't you have a genin team or something?"_

_"Sakura––"_

_"I'm not in the mood, nii-san, and I have lessons soon. I want to warmup."_

_"You tested positive for wind chakra too, right?" _

_The pink-haired kunoichi stiffened, already knowing where this particular topic was going down to. __"Nii-san, please."_

_"I'm fine with Uchiha Itachi teaching you about water manipulation as long as you let me teach you wind manipulation."_

_"I don't want to learn wind manipulation and I don't need your approval. Now, please go, nii-san."_

_"Why not? It's great you have an affinity for two elements."_

_She murmured with downcast eyes, "I preferred it when you made it a pastime out of ignoring me instead of this bullshit." _

_No, that was a blatant lie. She used to idolize him as a little girl starting the Acaademy and every time he avoided her gaze a small piece of her little heart would break. But at least back then his behavior had an explanation, according to her parents. Suguru was broken by his missions, hence his coldness, and Sakura had to be a very understanding girl and not bother him. She could deal with that brother easily, painfully, but she wasn't very sure how to deal with this Suguru, and that situation made her extremely uncomfortable._

_The blond Haruno winced at her words, but he didn't let that stop him. "Sakura, this is illogical. You've always wanted me to train you ever since you started the Academy."_

_"Not anymore."_

_"Why not?"_

_"Dammit, nii-san, I'm tired of being compared to you! Is it too hard for that genius brain of yours to understand that having you teach me won't make the comparisons go away?" she shouted at him, her green eyes lit with fire._

_Suguru gaped at her, but Sakura could only continue glaring at him. Prodigy he may be, he was completely clueless when it came to relationships. It wasn't hard for her to believe that her brother was completely unaware of the self-esteem issues his existence gave her, both directly and indirectly. She had thought his earlier comment of being a bad brother was to recognize this particular shortcoming, but he had probably apologized for not being around to teach her how to be a better shinobi. Ah, how foolish they come._

_"I… I didn't know you felt that way."_

_"Not many do," she replied quickly. "Now, can you please just… leave?"_

_"Fine, but this is not over, Sakura."_

_He body-flickered away, leaving behind a poof of smoke where he was previously standing. Once she was sure he was truly gone, Sakura sighed shakily and slowly crouched on the ground, gripping her knees tightly until her knuckles turned white. She felt her eyes burn but she willed the tears to not fall. Itachi would be coming soon and she didn't want him to believe she was a little girl scared of her first lesson with the meanie Uchiha._

_"It is over, Suguru-niisan. It has been over for many years."_

* * *

><p>"Sakura?"<p>

She jerked awake and quickly sat up, looking around the room the Garrison had provided her with dangerous eyes. Mikasa was sitting at the edge of her bed, her normally blank gray eyes colored by a bit of worry. She belatedly realized that her cheeks were wet and her hands had been harshly holding the bedsheets, probably explaining why her sister was concerned.

"Morning," she croaked, slowly unclenching her hands.

Mikasa frowned at her and heaved a sigh. "Are you okay? You were… crying in your sleep."

She had been, but she had no idea why or how that had happened. Whenever she tried to remember certain dreams, she came across a thick wall. Usually, bits and pieces of dreams were available to her, or at least she had the gist of the scenes in the dream, but some days, like this one, every single thing about the dream faded at the moment she woke up. "I don't remember what I was dreaming about. Small mercies, I guess."

The black-haired soldier continued staring at her, unconvinced, but she decided to drop the subject with a sigh. "Fine."

Sakura perked up and stood up, throwing Mikasa off the bed. She giggled when she landed on her bottom, something the younger Ackerman didn't appreciate. She crossed the room before Mikasa could retaliate violently and opened her closet, searching for her uniform in the sea of messy clothes and underwear. "Aha!" she exclaimed when she found a clean white shirt and the rest of her uniform. At least today she didn't have to put the harnesses of her 3DMG.

She started undressing and asked conversationally, "Anyway, how did you find me? I've been looking for you for days and couldn't find you."

Mikasa didn't even bat an eyelash at Sakura's naked form and and simply stood up, removing imaginary dirt from her bottom. "I bumped into… _someone_ and asked him where you were staying."

Sakura didn't miss the dark look that crossed her face when she said _someone, _but decided to ignore it; she had other pressing matters. "Hm, fair enough. Is there a reason why you're here?"

"There's been something that has been bothering me about the trial."

Sakura finished wrapping her breasts and putting on her underwear and replied curiously, "Oh? Okay, I'm listening."

"Why didn't you stop him?"

She buttoned her shirt and faltered slightly at the last one. "Who are we talking about?"

"You know. _Him_," she repeated venomously.

The kunoichi frowned and quickly pulled up her white trousers. "You mean Captain Levi?"

"Yeah, that midget."

She snorted and had a hard time keeping her disapproving face. Her little sister had never been a stickler for rules and decorum, just like Sakura herself, but she had a new way of insulting superiors. "Now, Mikasa, I know he's a bit on the short side but you're not calling me a midget are you?"

"I'm not joking, Sakura," Mikasa replied coldly. "I'm asking you why didn't you stop that midget from beating Eren up."

Sakura raised her eyebrows at her. "I couldn't just interrupt the trial and stop my superior from beating Eren up."

"Yes, you could've. You just chose not to."

"That would've just given a bad impression about the Survey Corps, Mikasa. I talked about it with Commander Erwin and Captain Levi before the trial, about the possibility of this happening, and even though I don't fully understand the inner workings of the military, I knew that––"

"You don't need to be subjected to the military," she interrupted, walking in front of her and trying to intimidate her with her imposing height, something Sakura didn't appreciate in the least. "I remember what you did to that titan years ago, Sakura. I'm sure you can do it to everyone in that room and not have a single scratch on your face. But instead you knew before going inside that court room what would happen and did absolutely nothing to stop it."

She narrowed her eyes and met Mikasa's cold stare straight on. "Yes, I could have, but that goes against everything I stand for. Those people sitting next to me in the stands are my _friends_. The person who beat Eren up is my _Captain_. The man who gave the order is my _Commander. _I can't go against the people who I work for, whom I would die for. Captain Levi did it for Eren's sake."

"Your midget Captain is a sadistic person who takes enjoyment out of beating up people who would die for humanity, but look at you, defending him. Does that mean you've all learned a few things about him?"

There was a familiar chakra presence outside the door, but going to open it right now would only interrupt her conversation with Mikasa. She had a couple of points to make clear. "I won't get angry at you for how you address my superior ––_I _had problems with him too–– but I won't have you saying that he's sadistic and my teammates follow in his footsteps. That's uncalled for, Mikasa."

"Is that why you're siding with them over us? Because you love them more than Eren and me?"

Sakura spluttered and unwittingly took a step back. "What the hell are you talking about? How dare you say such things?"

"Eren gave us a _home_, Sakura. The Jaegers gave us a second chance, and this is how you pay them? You could've done something to stop it!"

She had identified the presence to be Levi, and he was still stationed outside her door. Why he would stay outside was a question she would save for another time. "You have no idea how grateful I am to them."

"Yet you've done nothing for him until now. You promised to never leave us, to protect us, but so far you've done none of that. You knew beforehand about the trial and just watched by the sidelines. Didn't even lift a finger to avoid it."

_You call yourself a iryo-nin, but how many lives have you saved? A kunoichi, yes? But how many lives have you taken to protect us?_

_We're next, and like always, you're going to be the one to survive._

She winced as the memory of a recurring nightmare replayed in her head. Even though the words were different, the tone of voice was almost exactly the same to the Mikasa in her nightmare. "All right, you're misunderstanding, Mikasa. Life doesn't work like that. You can't just––"

"No, _you're _not understanding what you're doing wrong. You promised our parents, you promised _us, _to never abandon us and a stupid military branch gives you _friends_ and you become their dog."

Her eyes narrowed, her rage and sorrow growing with each word Mikasa uttered. "That's outrageous and you know it."

They had never had a fight this big, ever. Mikasa had always been such an understanding, calm young lady, but whenever Eren was concerned, she turned into the most protective and smothering person Sakura had ever met. She just had never expected that her own sister would turn on her because of Eren, but maybe she had just been delusional. Love made people do very outrageous things, after all.

"I knew you never meant it. You were just saying those things to calm us down, right? What's next? Giving both Eren and me up for experimentation? I mean, you didn't even say anything to those men who thought I was the enemy too. Are you going to agree with everyone else that Eren's a traitor and a menace to humanity?"

"Mikasa, stop."

"Are you okay with Eren being a weapon, then? Make him die a dog's death? I remember you speaking against all of that, but now you're on their side. My, how the tables turn. Or did you forget about––"

The slap was loud and clear throughout the whole room, or maybe it was the shock and adrenaline that made everything louder, clearer. Mikasa's disbelief was a thing of nightmares, for sure. The rapidly red handprint on her cheek was something she had promised herself to never do. She had never laid a single finger on Mikasa, ever, even when she had been in dire need of discipline. The whole situation was a thing straight out of her darkest dreams. Had she never woken up, then? Was she still asleep?

"M-Mikasa…"

She was initially just as surprised as she was, but then her eyes narrowed at her hatefully and whispered tonelessly, "I'm glad to know where your allegiances lie, _Sakura._"

The black-haired Ackerman walked briskly past her and left the room without closing the door. Before going away, she scowled menacingly to the left, where Captain Levi's chakra presence was located, and stalked in the opposite direction. Sakura just stood in the middle of the room, staring at the open door until Levi stepped inside the room and shut the door quietly behind him.

"You eavesdropped on our conversation," Sakura pointed out nonchalantly, her stare holding no anger.

"Yes. I didn't feel like coming back later and I was already here."

"Most people would get mad about being spied on."

Levi raised an eyebrow and leaned against the door. "You're not most people and I don't care about you being angry."

"So why are you here?"

"I didn't come to yell at you, if that's what you're worried about." Sakura snorted and fought against the tiny smile that wanted to break out. "Not that you were ever afraid of that. No, I came here for something more serious than a little tantrum over Eren."

"Don't make fun of Mikasa."

"Don't tell me what to do, Ackerman." They were quiet for a few moments, each person unsure on what to say. Sakura didn't really feel like talking or arguing, and who knew what the hell went on in Levi's mind half the time. After a few minutes he continued, "I just came back from a meeting with Zackly and Erwin about my team. Zackly had no qualms about any of the members except you."

Sakura cocked her head to the side in confusion. "Me?"

"You're Eren's adoptive older sister. Zackly believes that if worse comes to worst, you will defend Eren and not kill him, potentially ruining the mission."

She sighed in understanding and nodded weakly. "So you're here to kick me out."

"Don't jump into conclusions. You know I hate when you do that."

"Not sorry."

Levi rolled his eyes and frowned at her. "I told Zackly he had nothing to worry about because as long as I was there, Eren had no chance of surviving if he went out of control. But we both know that's a lie."

She resisted the urge to smirk at the admittance that she was more powerful than him when it came to human-to-human combat, but she barely had an advantage without revealing her ninja status. "So you lied to Zackly because?"

He pushed himself away from the door and came to stand right in front of her in a move similar to what Mikasa had done earlier. But instead of doing it to intimidate her, he didn't have his threatening face or stance. "Be honest, Ackerman. If I ordered you to kill Eren, would you do it?" His stare was more heated than usual, but he was observing her features intensely, as if trying to see if he could catch her lies.

Sakura bit her lip and shook her head slowly. "I can't kill my little brother, Captain."

"Even if he attacked your teammates?"

"I said I can't kill him, but I never said anything about not stopping him."

Levi continued staring at her, his gray eyes hard and unyielding. It should make Sakura uncomfortable to have someone observe her for any sign of falsehood, but she knew Levi didn't mean anything bad about it. He had lied to the highest military authority about a very delicate mission for her. He was just trying to make sure he hadn't made a grave mistake from the beginning.

The Captain nodded slowly and stepped back to allow her more space. "I hope you understand what I'm putting on the line for you."

"I do."

"Don't go against my orders, Ackerman. We're both going to be under scrutiny. One mistake and it's not only our jobs, but Eren's life."

"I know. I promise."

Levi sighed heavily and turned around to leave the room. "The only reason why I'm letting this happen is because I trust your word. We're leaving for the old headquarters tomorrow at dawn. You're riding in the rear."

He quickly left after saying that, not sticking around to hear what Sakura would reply with, and she was grateful for that. He had probably listened to Mikasa devaluing her promises and stances, so he knew the exact meaning behind his words. Quite frankly, she was touched, considering their somewhat rocky relationship. Though after two years, there were bound to be some improvements in their dynamic.

Sakura sighed and sat on her bed, running her hands through the bedsheets. She had barely been awake for an hour but she felt more exhausted than after an expedition. Not only did she have to worry about being impartial with Eren, but now she had a sister who was righteously angry at her. Mikasa had been out of line, attacking her integrity, but Sakura had physically attacked her by slapping her. Hadn't she promised to never hurt them and always protect them? Was Mikasa right, and her words really meant nothing?

Then what the hell had Levi just done?

* * *

><p>Waking up before the sunrise had always been hard for Sakura. The past couple of weeks spend cleaning up Trost had been a much-needed reprieve from their usual days in the Survey Corps. Last night, though, she had been unable to sleep, dark thoughts plaguing her mind whenever she closed her eyes. Today marked the end of their stay in the Garrison's south headquarters, since Squad Levi would be taking Eren to an undisclosed location for safekeeping.<p>

Nobody was supposed to know they were leaving today, but maybe that statement didn't apply to Armin Arlert.

The blond was petting Haruto quite gently, and the veteran horse was neighing in content, completely oblivious to his surroundings. Her horse had that effect on people, she had found. She loudly cleared her throat to alert him of her presence, and he jumped almost a foot in the air of the scare she gave him. "S-S-Sakura?"

She giggled and body-flickered next to him, her green Survey Corps cloak billowing from the speed. The Garrison stable was quite bigger than the Survey Corps's, even if they didn't need horses as much as them. The difference was in the quality and care of the horses, and it was very obvious which horses belonged to which branch. "Came to say good-bye?"

"Good-bye? What are you talking about?"

Sakura raised an eyebrow in confusion until her eyes widened in realization. "Oh," she murmured. "You didn't know. Damn."

"Know about what?"

She looked outside one of the stable windows. It was still dark outside, but the darkness was much lighter than when she had woken up. She had wanted to spend some time with Haruto before Squad Levi would meet at the stable at dawn, but that idea had quickly gone out the window when she saw Armin. She still needed to drive him out of the stable before someone saw them and accused her of sharing sensitive information with a cadet, but they still had a little bit of time before Squad Levi, the only group who had a reason for coming to the stables at such an ungodly hour, arrived. "So you come here before every morning then?"

Armin nodded slowly, willing to let Sakura keep her secret for longer, and continued petting Haruto. "It's the only time they're empty. You would think people would pay less attention to horses, but they're quite popular."

"More like they need a lot of maintenance."

"True. Do you come here often?"

"Only to spoil my horse."

"Your horse is in here?"

"You're petting him, actually."

He immediately stopped petting and gaped at her, horrified. "Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't know." Haruto whinnied in protest, making her chuckle and beckon Armin to continue his petting. "You don't mind?"

"You're asking if you don't mind me letting you spoil my horse? Of course not, Armin. Even if Haruto hated you, you're practically family."

His blue eyes softened and he started petting her horse much more naturally. "Family," he murmured wistfully. "Most of the cadets had at least one member alive, and none of them were from Shiganshina. Nobody understood. You must feel misunderstood too, right? For different reasons." At her questioning look, he further clarified, "Mikasa told me about yesterday."

She grimaced and put her head down, unable to handle his gaze. "I know I made a mistake."

"I'm not saying you made a mistake, Sakura. I know enough to not take sides. All I'm saying is that I know you feel lonely at times, because nobody is exactly like you. I'm sure Eren must be feeling it too. That's why… That's why it's good both of you have me and Mikasa."

Sakura was about to protest, that Mikasa was no longer willing to be there for her, but Armin quickly shut her up with just one look. The Training Corps did wonders for him if he turned out like that.

"I may not understand the reason behind your decisions or your moral code, but I will always support your decisions. And if you need someone to listen to you, I'm here too." Armin's serious face quickly morphed as a wry smile stretched his lips. "Eren and Mikasa have their own problems to be listening to someone else's."

Sakura's arms shook slightly from the restraint she placed on herself, the restraint to launch herself at Armin and bury her head on his shoulder. They were much closer, yes, but Armin always comforted verbally rather than with physically. Putting him in that awkward situation after giving her such heartwarming advice would only leave a sour taste in her mouth.

She looked outside the window and found the sky was much lighter than before. The rest of her squad would come here at any moment with Eren in tow to take him to the old headquarters. She sighed and turned back to Armin. "I think it's time for you to leave, Armin. My squad is coming soon and I don't want us accused of sharing intelligence about a delicate mission."

The blond raised his arms slightly in a placating manner, an understanding grin on his face. "No need to tell me, Sakura. I figured by the way you kept staring outside and your nervous look that you were doing something you're not supposed to." He lowered his arms and his grin quickly formed into a thoughtful frown. "Do take care of Eren, though. I haven't had a chance to talk to him after the trial, and I don't––"

"It's okay, Armin. I'm worried too. But don't worry, Eren will be safe with me. I won't let anything happen to him."

"Don't let him do anything either."

"It's a two-way street."

He nodded and saluted her admirably. "I wish you the best. Good luck."

She saluted back, her features hard to match his earnest tone. "Thank you."

Armin exited the stable from the back door, leaving Sakura standing in front of a neighing Haruto. She shook her head in exasperation and started petting him, running her fingers through his golden brown mane and coat. Even though his features were light, his eyes were a almost black, and Sakura couldn't help but feeling that she knew someone with black eyes and someone with name like Haruto's, though whenever she tried to remember she hit a mental wall, as if it was impossible for her to access her memories.

Maybe one day she would meet the black-eyed person and someone with a name like Haruto's, but maybe she should start getting rid of her expectations before she set herself up for disappointment.

She sensed the chakra presence of Squad Levi and Eren closing on the stable, and she closed her eyes with wariness and fatigue. Her fight with Mikasa and Levi's orders had made her discover an insidious problem: her relationship with Eren. She loved the boy dearly, but how was she supposed to act in a way that didn't put him in danger? For this assignment, Squad Levi wasn't on her side, but humanity's. They didn't trust Eren, and she would be surprised if they trusted her around Eren. She couldn't coddle him, because that would immediately cast Levi in a bad light, but at the same time she couldn't look at him the same way her teammates did. It was simply impossible to even fathom the idea of killing him if he decided to betray them.

Levi appeared first, followed by the rest of the squad, with Eren right in the middle. He seemed very uncomfortable surrounded by her friends, but as soon as he saw her, his teal eyes brightened considerably. Sakura purposely turned her head away from him towards Levi, the perfect picture of a soldier awaiting orders, but she could still see Eren's hurt look from the corner of her eyes, causing her heart to clench in guilt.

The Captain raised an eyebrow at her but didn't offer a comment, instead heading towards his horse Isabel and opening the door to release her from and led her outside the stable. The Survey Corps followed suit, and Sakura noticed that Eren chose Haruto's neighbor. She sincerely wished that he had ridden that horse before hand to understand his movements or else he would have an awkward ride ride.

As soon as they exited the stable, the members of Squad Levi mounted their horses and rode to the west, towards their old headquarters. Even if it was just a bit past dawn, the streets were already starting to crowd a bit, but this was a far cry from what Trost looked like before the titans attacked.

Sakura made sure to stay right at the rear, a considerable distance from Eren and almost everyone in the squad, who was riding in the front with Petra and Olou. Whenever Eren turned his head around to give her a questioning stare, Sakura would purposely look to the side, pretending to be interested by something in the forest, avoiding his gaze. It was the simplest way for her to remain impartial and thus in Squad Levi. She would never be able to look at Eren as a threat like the rest of her teammates did, but at the same time she couldn't act like they always did. Things had changed when Wall Maria fell, and now things had changed again.

She couldn't help but eavesdrop on Gunther and Eld's conversation, which was about his girlfriend Rosalind, or Rose, as he called her. Eld would propose to her as soon as their mission was done and they would move together to Karanase.

"I guess you owe Sakura some thanks for that!" Gunther exclaimed with a hearty chuckle. He slowed down Lea's trot so that he was next to Sakura and grinned at her. "Wasn't it you that got this knucklehead his first date?"

"Yup, he was too enchanted by her beauty to make a move on her," she replied with fake enthusiasm. She knew she should be happy for her friend, who was getting married and possibly starting a new life as a civilian, but right now at least she could pretend as if nothing was wrong and act with her teammates like she always did.

Maybe this would be a good time to talk to Olou about the bet.

Gunther furrowed his brow slightly before smiling and spurring his horse back next to Eld. "See? You always need a woman in your life to get things done, right Eld?"

He sighed. "Are you insinuating something, Gunther? As far as I remember, you're still single. Does that mean you can't do anything by yourself?"

"Right now I don't need a partner. My mom is the only woman I need in my life right now."

From her spot in the back she could see Olou trying to listen to their conversation, even though he was in the front with Eren and Petra. Not that it was hard, considering the whole team was quiet except for Gunther and Eld. Petra still refused to speak to Eren and wasn't in the mood to tolerate Oluo's shit; Eren had zero incentives to spark conversation with any team members except Sakura, who for some reason was ignoring him; Levi was brooding quietly with a prominent scowl on his face yet again; Olou, for all his stupidity, had finally learned when to be quiet; the pink-haired member might as well have a raincloud above her.

And soon after Eld and Gunther's conversation died down, leaving their team in a rather awkward silence.

Sakura observed each of her teammates and sighed when she realized their chemistry had been completely ruined by Eren. When they traveled, they were almost always chatting amongst each other. Even Levi sometimes joined in, though most of the time it was to tell them to shut up or that they were being annoying, but at least he talked. Today he hadn't said a single word, hadn't barked one measly order.

She didn't want to blame Eren, but having the ability to shift into the one thing that constantly ate their friends and comrades didn't win him any brownie points. Sakura hadn't witnessed his titan form yet and nobody talked about it as if it were taboo, but she dearly hoped it didn't look anything like the monster that ate Liesel and Jung, or the one that ate Kalura.

Kalura… Traitor to humanity or not, what would she think of what she was doing? Would she understand her position, or would she agree with Mikasa's words? As much as she wanted to deny it, Mikasa was right in some aspects. She was refraining from using her ninja powers against her own friends. She had never thought those promises would be mutually exclusive; if she knew she never would've made them. At any moment she could easily take Eren and run away, and she was faster than horses and 3DMG so it wouldn't be a problem to flee, and even less of a problem to remain hidden.

But Eren wouldn't want that. Eren wanted to help the Survey Corps. It had been his dream since she had met him, and he had finally reached his goal, albeit probably not the way he had envisioned. Still, he had the power to change the course of humanity, more so than Sakura ever could. He would never forgive her if she took him away and hid him. Mikasa would approve, but Eren would be resentful towards her for the rest of their lives.

And, in the end, it all boiled down to that: what did Eren want? As uneasy as he looked, Sakura knew that he was happy to be a part of the Special Operations Squad and be close to Levi, his idol. The trial, the suspicion, the pain she was giving him… It was all part of the price he had to pay for the life he wanted. Mikasa was still too young to understand that, to comprehend that no decision didn't have its fair amount of struggles, but Sakura understood that for his dream of annihilating titans, he was willing to pay anything. Mikasa wasn't wrong about her reasons for refusing to get Eren out of the trial, but at least this was the outcome he wanted.

"Keep your forehead like that and I'm sure your face will stay like that forever," Levi commented in his usual bored tone, albeit his voice lower than usual so that no one would hear them. He had abandoned his post behind Eren and was now keeping pace with her and Haruto.

Her shoulders tensed and she glared at Levi, who remained completely unperturbed by her dark look. "Oh, so you can brood all you want with a face that says 'I want to kill you', but if I do it then it's wrong?" she whispered back. She looked ahead to see if anyone was seeing their little argument, and much to her satisfaction she noticed all of her teammates remained oblivious to their little squabble. Really, did they have horrible hearing or did Gunther and Eld just gossip loudly?

"I don't brood."

Her forehead smoothed and she resisted the urge to laugh at his face. Really, what was it with this guy? "You're not fooling anyone, Captain. Even Olou has adopted your moody personality. Have you noticed?"

He grimaced slightly and he broke their eye contact to stare at Olou's back. "Yeah, I've noticed. It's a bit annoying."

"Maybe if you taught him how to pull it off, it wouldn't be such an annoyance to the rest of us."

"Teach him… how to brood?"

"Aha, so you admit you brood!"

"Tch, whatever. Anyway, you're his friend. Can't you tell him to stop, or something?"

Ah, if only he knew why Olou was imitating him. She knew that Olou had suspicions that Petra "loved" Levi, and was thus emulating his personality with the hope that Petra would "love" him too. However, she would have to teach Olou that trying to be like Levi would never work if he wanted Petra to fall in love with him, with cocky, asshole, loyal Olou. Maybe now that they were staying in a separate headquarters with a babysitting job and away from the Survey Corps she would be able to talk him out of it and help him woo Petra.

A month to fall in love… Hm, maybe she should write a novel about that.

She giggled and shook her head. No, she had ability in neither music nor writing nor art… But she could kill thirteen-meter tall, human-eating titans so maybe that wasn't so bad.

"Nope, can't tell him to stop," she replied to his earlier question in a much lighter tone. To think that Olou's hopelessness in love would help her feel better was a little cruel but at the same time quite hilarious. "I mean, the team can't handle two Captains, but those are the things we do for the people we love."

Levi grunted in assent but offered no reply, effectively killing their conversation. But he didn't urge Isabel to take his spot right behind Eren either, opting to remain in the back. She wasn't very sure why he would go against his own plans, but maybe even he felt a little stifled by the atmosphere in the front.

After a couple of hours, they reached the old base, a rather dirty and old castle. Levi immediately ordered the team to start cleaning, barely able to keep his disgust reined in. Sakura had been looking forward to a nap, considering she hadn't slept the night before, but duty called and she had learned Levi was the most irritable shit whenever his surroundings were unclean.

She was assigned the cleaning of the basement, an old and dark room made out of cold stone and filled with cobwebs. The old Survey Corps had left a couple of books and a bed behind, probably serving as a sort of study away from all the mess in the top. The Survey Corps must've sure been different back then, when they were a respectable group of people fighting for their newly-lost freedom. Now they were considered suicidal soldiers with a penchant for trouble and heroics, not people who wanted to regain their land and power.

This old basement would serve as Eren's room, so she shouldn't have been surprised when he showed up.

She stopped sweeping and remained still in the middle of the room, waiting for Eren's chakra presence to get inside. This wasn't a chanced meeting; he knew she was here because he was there when Levi assigned their posts. After being coldly ignored throughout their journey, why would he still seek her out?

Eren's chakra was now in the room, but she still refused to turn around. Her grip on the broomstick became tighter, and the wood cracked a bit under her strength. "What are you doing here, Eren?" she asked in a cold tone. Her eyes might give her away, but her voice had always been by her side. "You're supposed to be cleaning the rooftops."

He was quiet, and she sent a bit of chakra to her eardrums so that she could detect his gulp and the clench of his fingers. "I finished my duties," he replied, his voice matching hers.

"Then report to the Captain."

"This is my room." His words were becoming more heated, he was growing angrier. Good, maybe then he would avoid her until he gained the Squad's trust, the moment she had decided to drop her charade and smother him in a hug.

"Then I'm ordering you to report to the Captain."

Eren growled, "What the hell are you doing, Sakura? Don't tell me…" He sighed and was quiet for a moment until he whispered, "Don't tell me you actually think I'm like _them_?"

His words constricted her heart, and suddenly it was hard to breathe. Her grip on the broomstick became even tighter, and if she didn't reign in her emotions she would definitely break it. "What I believe won't influence this mission. I don't see why I should answer your question."

"Dammit, Sakura, not even your teammates treat me like this, and they don't know me at all."

Her resolve crumbled at that statement and she was about to explain why she was treating him so horribly when she felt Petra's chakra presence heading towards the basement, no doubt to listen to their conversation. She loved her friend dearly, but right now she wanted to yell at her for not trusting her. She could understand her mistrust towards Eren, but to also see if Sakura would betray them was a low blow. She didn't know her best friend could make her feel this horrible.

Besides, what was it with her teammates deciding to listen to her conversations? Did they think she would snap and betray them?

"You're a titan-shifter. Until you prove you can control your transformation, I'm unsure whether you are an enemy to humanity." There, that was what she was supposed to say to convince Petra she wasn't a danger to their mission, but she still wouldn't leave. She was still right outside the basement's door, dammit.

She heard Eren's heavy footsteps getting close to her and wasn't surprised to feel his rough hands on her shoulder whirl her around to force her to look up at his enraged, tearful eyes. Her voice she could control, but her stare would be her undoing. It took everything she had to not embrace him and coo away his fears.

"You don't know if I'm an enemy to humanity? Even after I spoke to you all those times how I wanted to kill the titans, how I wanted to join the Survey Corps? You still aren't sure?"

Petra was still rooted outside, and her hopes of being able to save this conversation died down when she realized her best friend would wait until they finished talking. Damn her and her insecurities. If it was just her position in the squad on the line she would gladly reveal her true colors, but Levi had stuck his neck out for her and she wasn't _that _big of a bitch to him.

She dropped her head to avoid staring at his teal eyes any longer and she whispered, "I think it's best if you leave, Eren."

His hands were still gripping her shoulders tightly, but after a few seconds he slowly unclenched his fingers and dropped his hands listlessly by his side. A few more moments passed and he stepped back, turned around, and left the room with the most defeated walk she had ever seen. She looked up just in time to see him open the door, revealing a confused Petra.

"Oh, Petra, did you need something?" Eren asked tiredly.

Her friend stared past him and at Sakura, who had such a hateful glare on her face that it made her shiver. "I was looking for you! You should report back to the Captain about now or else he gets cranky."

Eren nodded slowly and excused himself softly, leaving a shocked Petra behind. She remained rooted in her spot, unable to fathom the strain she had caused in her friendship with her best friend, who was looking at her with anger she had never seen aimed at her. "S-Sakura… I–– I––"

"I think you should leave too," Sakura quietly offered, beautifully masking her rage by making her voice sound conversational.

"But––"

"_Now_," she growled.

Petra's head bobbed quickly and she fled, her footsteps echoing down the dimly-lit, stone hallway.

The broomstick finally snapped under the pressure, the piece falling to the floor with two _clacks_.

So her sister, brother, and best friend had effectively alienated her; who was next?

Sakura chuckled as she continued sweeping the room, little droplets of water falling to the floor.

* * *

><p><strong>Oh, that was quite the roller coaster. Seriously, what's up with Squad Levi doubting that Sakura will do something stupid for her little brother. Drama after drama stacked on top of each other, and I can't wait to get to the action, but this comes first. I know I promised a chapter for last week, but life became busy and this last damn scene was a bitch to write, for various reasons. Mostly because none of the characters or settings were agreeing with me, but I finally found the way to write it comfortably.<strong>

**I would like to give my immense gratitude to AstroKitty, aj07to, Bum reviews, MiniRoonie, FairiesDescent, Basia Orci, animagirl, Tainted Heroine, SakuMulti, Aka-chansama, Sincerely Athena, AmeRaSora, lucife56, KuroAka, phoenixyfriend, catxangel, GalanthaDreams, mun3litKnight, Lady Light, dark-wolf-howl, urs-v , Bossassbitch, cherryblossom1423, cj1of4, Mesterio, dor dor dor, Love Remedy, Katy bae, BLacKxBUrN, pseudo41, bleachfan462 , TheCrazyAnimeFan, SakuraAkatsukiTaichi, HayleyComet, Dreamtraveler1313, Marx D. Soul, hotredsakura1315, Black snake eyes, Guest, and LuridLullaby. Your kind words were an encouragement to get that last piece of shit scene out of my brain. **


	15. Framing

A loud noise of something slamming against the wall woke Sakura from her deep sleep. She sat up immediately and almost jumped the assailant before she saw Eld's figure in the doorway. There was no light coming from the window, and the torches' fires in the hall were dimmer than usual, meaning a long time had passed since she had gone to sleep.

"Sakura! There's an emergency with the titans we caught! We need to go back to Trost immediately."

Before she could even reply, Eld left her room, probably to wake up the rest of the team. Confused, but aware of the mood, Sakura jumped got out of bed and put on her uniform with startling speed. The belts, which usually gave her the most amount of trouble, were easier to put on, even in her slightly sleepy mind.

She jogged down the hallways, mindful to avoid the chakra signatures of two people. She had screwed up majorly with one of them, but with the other one she just didn't think she could deal with without punching her. Dinner last night had been so awkward she had been forced to retire early before any of her teammates felt the need to asks questions. Surprisingly, none of them felt a change in the dynamic between Petra and Sakura, which was weird because they hadn't talked to each other, or even looked at each other. Were they dense or were there no major differences from her relationship with Petra? She knew she was quiet, but was she really _this _quiet?

The team had already gathered at the stables by the time she reached them. The most notable one was Hange, who was a puddle of anxiousness and anger. Moblit, who had brought the message, was also quite shaken, considering their most precious project had been destroyed. As soon as Sakura mounted Haruto, Hange ordered the team to move out immediately, taking over the role of team leader. Maybe she hadn't noticed that this wasn't her squad, but Levi made no comment or move to remind her who was in charge. He probably understood better than anyone in the group what Hange was going through.

Yesterday's tension was masked by the sense of urgency the nine Survey Corps soldiers had in reaching the Garrison castle. That was part of the deal Zackly had done with Erwin Smith after months of battling to start Hange's project. Since the Survey Corps's current headquarters were so far away from civilization, if the titans managed to run away at night, they would go out in the open and attack unsuspecting towns. While having the titans in the middle of a bustling district like Trost might seem counterintuitive, Zackly said that the sheer amount of Garrison soldiers and the immense size of the Garrison castle protected both the citizens and the soldiers from an outbreak. She still had her doubts about his decision, but when it came to titans, there really was no right answer on how to manage them–– save for killing them, of course.

But even if the team was determined to get to Trost as fast as they could, Sakura could still feel the change in the dynamic with the team, even if the team was unaware of it for now. Petra was especially cautious of Sakura, making sure to never ride too close to her or her line of sight. Whenever Petra thought Sakura wasn't looking, she could easily see the deep shame and guilt on her face, downtrodden eyes and heavy bags adding to her haggard appearance, but it wasn't enough to make Sakura feel better or even slightly forgiving towards her.

And Eren stayed away from her for entirely different reasons. She was riding in the left rear, but whenever Eren's horse got a bit tired and needed to go a bit back, he always avoided her side and went for the right rear, putting Levi, who was also riding on the rear, in the middle of their little avoidance game.

To make matters worse, Levi ––whom she previously thought of as an antisocial, cold-hearted man–– was the only one who finally figured out the difference in her dynamics with the two people, if his weird, constant stares to the three of them were anything to go by. That Levi found out before Oluo was a bit of an embarrassment to her best friend, though maybe she was underestimating Levi. He may be absolute shit in expressing himself, but maybe she didn't give him enough credit in being attuned to his team.

Then there was the initial chaos Eren's presence caused the team. Their ride to the old headquarters had proven that the dynamic had changed dramatically. Was this the reason why her teammates failed to feel the strain in her relationship with Petra, because they themselves felt the tension Eren gave them and attributed Petra and Sakura's change to that? Even if that was true, it still didn't explain how Levi had found out before everyone else.

It was a bit past dawn when they finally reached Trost, but the streets were still slightly empty, much to their luck. Hange led them straight to the Garrison castle that kept the titans, her urge to reach the place almost heartbreaking because Sakura already knew how this story would end. She left her horse to a man on the stable, not even bothering to check his credentials, and sped inside. Moblit followed heatedly in her footsteps, meanwhile the rest of Squad Levi took a bit longer, mostly because they were exhausted, particularly Eren, who had been up the whole night listening to Hange about her experiments.

And indeed, as soon as they reached the courtyard, Squad Levi witnessed Hange's breakdown. Amina, one of the main researchers, was also on the floor, but instead of outward signs of distress, she was more subdued, as if not quite believing her eyes. Even Sakura felt empty; she had risked her and Amina's lives to capture those titans, after all. She didn't even want to imagine the amount of time Amina spent observing and experimenting with the titans. Erwin had promised to not capture more titans for the rest of the year as part of the deal with taking Eren into custody, trusting Hange to find more about the titans for at least the duration of the year, but they had barely lasted a total of four months.

Erwin approached Levi and beckoned him to go out for a little talk, which the shorter man begrudgingly did. They would no doubt talk about the scene and the perpetrator. There were two possibilities for the killer: a very smart person who knew more about titans than they did or a very stupid person who thought killing those two titans would be better for humanity. There was no in-between. Personally, she leaned more towards the former choice, since the method and way of killing spoke of an experienced person, but she wouldn't put it past a rather talented but immature cadet to kill their research experiments.

Three Garrison soldiers approached Squad Levi and stood directly in front of Sakura. She didn't recognize either of them, but their stance was threatening. Before she could even open her mouth, the soldier in the middle took out a small piece of paper from his jacket's pocket, cleared his throat, and read, "Sakura Ackerman, you're hereby under arrest for suspicion of destroying government property." The two soldiers both stepped closer and each took one of Sakura's arms, taking advantage of her shock. "Take her to the dungeons."

"Wait, wait, what is going on?" Gunther finally exclaimed, snapping out of his stupor. "You can't just take our second-in-command like that!"

The rest of her teammates, even Eren, mirrored his thoughts, each offering their own protest. By now, Squad Levi had attracted everyone's attention, putting Sakura in an even more humiliating position. To be arrested was one thing, but for all of her comrades to find out in front of her made her want to crawl under the earth and never come back to the surface.

Erwin and Levi both came back from their private conversation and stopped at the Garrison soldier's side. "What is the meaning of this?" the blond commander questioned, his voice calm but with an underlying threat.

"Earlier at the scene we found two incriminating pieces of evidence that linked the crime to Sakura Ackerman." Even the way he pronounced her name made her want to cringe, but she was curious as to the evidence that made the Garrison reach the conclusion she was the killer. "First, strands of pink hair. Second, a piece of green fabric that matches the rip Ackerman currently has on her cape."

The kunoichi glanced down to see where this fabric was and almost laughed out loud when she found it. This had happened the day before Eren's trial, when she was in the courtyard with all of those trainees. She had no idea how it'd happened, but she had thought it had fallen off and hadn't worried too much about it. She had even stowed the cape away to protect it from further rips before coming back to the courtyard and finding Connie.

Obviously, the reason behind the rip was directly linked to this crime, but she was one-hundred-percent sure a person had _not _caused this to her cloak, and also very sure nobody had plucked any hairs from her head, unless this person had meticulously collected any pieces of hair that may naturally fall off, which was extremely creepy.

She shot the soldier who read her arrest letter a disbelieving look. "You obviously don't believe those two things make me the criminal, right?"

The soldier remained silent, his face betraying no emotion. The urge to strangle him increased exponentially.

"She isn't a criminal," Petra declared loudly. "Please, I was––"

"Shut up," Levi ordered, his voice cold.

The blond commander stared at the soldiers, his face a mask to what he was actually thinking. "I see," Erwin murmured after a pause. "Very well, take her to the dungeons. I'll personally go there later to get the truth out of her."

She didn't need to turn around to know her teammates were shocked, because she herself was horrified. The two soldiers who caught her arm dragged her away, because she was physically incapable of moving her limbs.

What… What was going on in her life? It seemed like a horrible nightmare that never ended. Such unfortunate events, two days in a row. What, had she angered some unknown god? Well, she didn't believe in them, to begin with, so maybe that was the reason. Still, this so-called god picked the worst time to get his revenge.

Like before, Sakura was confused by the complexity behind the Garrison's castle. By the time she fully processed the fact she was being arrested, they were already in front of her cell. The room was simple, with one half having a chair against the wall and the other half being the cell itself. One of the guards took the key from his back pocket and opened the metal cell and the other soldier forced her inside.

Sakura just stood by the cell door with her back facing the soldiers. There was a small bed to the left and a bucket on the right hand corner of the cell. The floor was hard, cold cement, and some of the spots were even damp from what she smelled was pee.

After what felt like an eternity, Sakura's limbs finally moved and she sat on the bed, her eyes dazed. She couldn't believe what was happening. Erwin had… betrayed her? Not only Erwin, but Levi as well. Why would either of them do that to her after the lengths they had gone in keeping her by their side? It simply made no sense.

Well, before jumping into conclusions, she should just wait for them to explain themselves. Erwin had said he was coming down to "get the truth out of her", after all.

And just as she had predicted, a couple of minutes later Erwin, Hange, and Levi strode in, their faces grim. Sakura immediately stood up and walked to the end of the cell, wrapping her hands around the bars.

"Thank you for keeping watch over her, gentlemen. We'll take it from here."

The two soldiers saluted the commander and left, though even they didn't notice when Levi skillfully pick pocketed the keys from one of the soldiers. That the keys didn't even jingle truly spoke of his talent in the thievery department.

The door of the dungeon opened and shut, indicating the Garrison soldiers were gone, and Levi sighed, flashing the keys to his comrades. "Well, look at that. Being a thug sure pays off."

"Open the door, Captain. I'm locked here with pee stains."

"Tch, disgusting." Levi stepped in and unlocked the cell door, allowing Sakura to quickly escape the smelly place. Well, the other side of the room didn't smell like roses, either, but at least the smell of urine wasn't as strong. Though maybe her rather sensitive nose was to blame, but she couldn't turn off her smell, especially since she wasn't currently reinforcing it with chakra.

Erwin grabbed the chair and turned it sideways so that it was facing the three officers, who somehow managed to all fit in the rather small part of the room. If anything, having Levi standing next to Erwin sure showed how small he was. "Please, Sakura, sit. You already suffered enough inconveniences."

Sakura sat down on the only chair and looked up to her three superiors. Even if Erwin had meant to be accommodating, it was still just a tad bit intimidating to have the people she admired looked down at her, even if they didn't look at her like an enemy. But she should stop feeling so small. After all, she was Sakura Ackerman, a powerful kunoichi with no known human equal.

"Like that soldier said, you were detained because they found pink hair and a piece of green cloak fabric at the crime site," Hange explained. "I personally saw the pieces of evidence, and though the hair is yours, the fabric of the cloak doesn't match ours. If anything, it matches an older version of our cloak. Which means the person knew your cloak was ripped but the person himself didn't rip the cloak."

"The only thing we're sure of is that you were set-up," Erwin continued. "Which is a bit troubling. Is there anyone you have recently angered?"

Besides Eren and Mikasa, no, but they would never do that to her, even if they were furious. "Not that I know of."

"Hm, just as I thought. And if we believe our comrades and your words, nobody outside the Survey Corps and your trusted friends should know that you're a sensor, either. Well, the only link we can make between your setup and the killing of the titans is that it was probably done by the same person. Someone out there wants to tarnish your reputation or cause your teammates to doubt you for some reason, maybe to make you an easy target for them to take out."

Levi's frown deepened. "That sounds like a stupid plan. If anything, even if we believed Ackerman did it, we would watch her more closely. The setup loses its purpose."

Hange crossed her arms and leaned to the left, so that her right shoulder was against the wall. "Erwin just said it was a possibility. That doesn't mean it was the true plan."

"That's besides the point. I must admit I'm unsure how to continue from here on out. We could let the killer think that his plan worked and we distrust Sakura, just to see how he would follow his plan and wait for him to slip-up. Or, we could say we trust Sakura and stop whatever plan he had."

"We should say we trust Sakura." Hange gave Sakura a small smile, which was the closest expression resembling happiness that she had showed since the morning. The ordeal had truly taken a lot out of her. "Not only that, but news of this would reach Zackly. He might even take Sakura out of the mission for not being on the side of the Survey Corps. It just muddles our plans if we say we think she killed my titans."

"No, we should observe the killer's next move," Levi said, his expression dark. "It allows us to manipulate the situation further. The killer will definitely be overconfident now that nobody is actively looking for him, and we can use that to catch him before the next expedition. And as for Zackly... Shitty-glasses, he won't be easily fooled like those Garrison soldiers. If anything, he and all the higher-ups will arrive at the same conclusion we did quite easily. Which makes the killer's motives quite baffling. Those two pieces of evidence would never hold up in an actual court."

"We can spend the whole day arguing about the killer's motives and not arrive to a definite conclusion," Erwin admitted. He stared up at the ceiling, his eyes deep in thought. "What would someone who infiltrated the military have to do with Sakura Ackerman?" From his two sides, both Hange and Levi stiffened, their eyes wide, causing Erwin to smile, even if he wasn't looking at them. "Well, we can be sure Sakura isn't the spy, correct? It makes no sense to hide this from her when she can help us in the long run."

"What do you mean?" Sakura finally asked, her voice strong despite the circumstances. "Someone infiltrated the military?"

The blond looked down at her, his smile replaced by a serious frown. "I'll walk you through the thought process. Why would someone kill titans which were protected by the military faction who hunts them down?"

"Because he doesn't want us to find out more about the titans."

"Exactly. But that's not all. This killer is also someone from the military, someone who could blend in without questions, and also someone with the ability to kill titans. This means someone who studied to be a titan killer. Now, why would a soldier who ultimately wishes to free humanity sabotage humanity's own intelligence?"

"He's not allied with humanity. And the only people not explicitly allied with humanity are titans..." Sakura's brow furrowed and she looked down, finally catching on to Erwin's line of thought. Someone who wasn't allied to humanity? Who would benefit from humanity's eventual downfall? Not titans, considering they lacked the mental capacity to understand extinction and victory. Definitely not humans, either. So, neither titans nor humans, but... "Titan-shifter," she eventually breathed. "Eren's not the only one. And this one isn't our ally."

The three officers nodded grimly, considering the conclusion wasn't a good one. "That's one of the conclusions we reached," Hange said. "Well, until today, at least. If we believe the titan-shifter and the one who set you up are the same person, then our predictions become more muddled. That is, if he doesn't know you're a sensor. However, since he is a spy, I wouldn't put it past him to know you're a sensor. It would make sense to take you out if you could pinpoint his status as titan-shifter."

"I must admit I haven't been wholly honest with my powers," Sakura admitted, her green eyes hard despite the suspicious looks on her three superiors. Maybe this was not the best time to say she had kept information from them, but right now they needed to know as much information about her to make a better hypothesis. "I sense both titans and humans," she continued, and the three of them visibly relaxed, as if they had already arrived to the same conclusion. Well, she wouldn't put it past them to know that much, considering their brain power. "Titans feel like a warped version of a human. I didn't realize it at first, but I finally figured out why titans felt so _familiar_. But Eren feels entirely human, even if he's a titan-shifter."

"So there's no way you could sense the spy," Erwin concluded, his face actually showing disappointment. "I was actually hoping you would help us find out the titan-shifter, at least so that I could avoid the other plan I had in mind."

"Plan?"

Yet again, Levi and Hange stiffened slightly, the action so minute that non-ninja eyes would've missed it. Erwin must've sensed it too, because he smiled yet again and patted his friends on the back slightly. "Relax, both of you. Sakura isn't the enemy. She could've easily led us to annihilation these past two years, leading us straight into the titans. Besides, even if she can't help us getting the spy, she can help us before and during the expedition."

Sakura felt her chest warm at the blatant display of trust Erwin was showing her. She knew it was quite the honor to be included in his circle, considering the amount of natural suspicion he had for the outside world. And indeed, if he gave everyone the benefit of the doubt, then he would've failed as a commander a long time ago. However, even if she felt proud of gaining his trust, she knew it had a price, considering now she would be at the forefront of his plans, and thus much easier to manipulate.

"I'll tell Zackly I want to put you through a military tribunal," he announced, much to Hange's shock, though Levi seemed to have known it would happen a long time ago. "You definitely won't be convicted, and I would wager there won't be a trial anyway because I'll tell Zackly part of my plan, but just the announcement should make our 'suspicions' of you apparent. We'll see from there what the titan-shifter has in mind, or if the killer is even the titan-shifter to begin with. I predict the titan-shifter will make no further moves against you, because if he infiltrated the military he must have a certain degree of intelligence and inside sources, but I can't completely discard the opportunity to allow him to slip-up."

"And, the price for the opportunity isn't that high, either," Hange continued, catching drift of Erwin's plan. "After all, playing the suspect for a month sure outweighs the very possible sacrifice we would have to make during the next expedition."

"Why are you so sure the spy will show up in our expedition?"

"We believe he's trying to sabotage the Survey Corps," Levi answered.

"Why now, though? Why start now out of all the times? He's had years to sabotage the Survey Corps. The only difference is... Ah, I get it." She chuckled humorlessly. "He sure is the catalyst of many things. So now there's the question of why he wants Eren."

"Yet again, it's only a guess," Erwin said. "We can't be sure of many things right now, which is why I want to capture the spy alive and hopefully without any casualties on our side. That's why I want you to play suspect."

"Sure, sounds like the sensible thing to do."

"I'll play along too," Levi said. "I'll keep Ackerman with us in the old headquarters until her trial."

"I think it'd be better if my squad kept Sakura." Hange got from her spot against the wall and stretched, some of her joints popping. "You already have your hands full with Eren. She'll be safe with me."

Well, though parting with her current team did make her sad, Sakura knew the little break would do her good. She had an estranged relationship with two members, and though nobody had felt the strain, they were bound to find out sooner than later. Besides, staying with Amina wouldn't be a bad thing; she hadn't spoken to her since before the Battle of Trost.

"I don't think your team will react positively to having the person who killed their precious research projects live among them," the black-haired man countered.

"Then Mike's team would be a good idea," Erwin continued, a mysterious twinkle in his eyes. Sakura raised an eyebrow; what was going on?

"No."

"My team, then."

"You don't have an official team, Erwin."

"Nanaba's?"

"_No."_

Hange laughed. "Geez, Levi, why are you shooting down every other idea that isn't yours? We'll treat your precious second-in-command quite well, don't worry."

He glared at Hange and Erwin, who both sported smug looks. "Tch, you two don't understand. This one" ––he pointed his thumb casually at Sakura–– "has problems with my team. Usually, I won't get involved in stupid drama, but I can't have my team acting stupid before an important expedition." He turned his glare from his two smirking friends towards Sakura. "And you better fix that problem in less than a month, or I'll take you off the squad for the expedition. Understood?"

Sakura stood up from her chair and squeaked, "Yessir."

Hange almost laughed at Sakura. She probably had never witnessed Levi act like an older familial figure, and, to her benefit, Levi almost never showed that side of his personality. Hange had never seen Levi care for a team as much as he cared for the current one- well, besides his first one, but those two had been his closest friends in the underground. Levi had admitted to Hange that he hadn't been with them for very long, maybe three years at the most, but they had been the only true friends he ever had until he joined the Survey Corps. Nobody had expected his current team to last so long, not even Levi himself, but sitting in front of them was part of the reason why.

She usually advised him to not get too attached to his teams, mostly to spare him the pain of bringing his teammates' corpses later on, but maybe with Sakura by their side it wasn't such a bad idea that he opened up a little bit more. She knew firsthand how much of a pain in the ass he was in terms of teamwork, always deciding to be the lone wolf, and Hange had a theory that his power could grow even more if he learned how to work with other people. The pink-haired soldier had initially failed to form a good partnership with Levi, but that could always change.

"Well, you must be very convincing, Levi. Even if your team is far away from civilization and innocent, we never know if something might slip."

He scoffed and his scowl deepened. "Never doubt my ability to destroy reputations, Erwin."

Hange finally barked a laugh and patted Sakura on the shoulder. "Oh, I do pity you, not for being a suspect, but for putting up with Levi." She smiled mischievously and staged-whispered, "But that's how he cares for his team."

"Shitty-glasses, shut up if you know what's good for you."

Even if his tone was menacing, the damage had already been done. Even if she didn't fully understand her Captain, and he didn't comprehend her either, at least this had shed a bit more light into his personality. She always knew he cared in some weird way of his, but having Hange, one of his closest friends, confirm her suspicions made it even better.

She had never regretted standing up for him and Squad Levi in front of Mikasa, but now she was proud of her decision. Mikasa would just have to learn that she cared about more people now.

* * *

><p>The ride back to the headquarters was more interesting than what Sakura expected. Since she met her Captain, she had always been aware he was an asshole, but in that little journey she realized he had never purposely been an asshole before, and thank goodness for <em>small <em>mercies like that. From alienating her from her team by making her sit far away during lunch to snubbing her whenever she asked a sensible question, Levi acted like the perfect example of someone a pacifist would assassinate.

Even Sakura wanted to strangle him and she was perfectly aware of his intentions. Sometimes it even felt like payback for all the trouble she had given him.

But it did wonders with her team chemistry. Whenever Levi was out of an earshot, Eld would give her pep talks, telling her that this was just a minor setback and he was sure things would be over soon. Gunther did a similar thing, but also offered her extra food and promised to make her something special when they arrived at the headquarters. Oluo talked shit behind his back and even promised her that he would burn his own cravat as a symbol of solidarity. Sakura didn't believe that statement, but appreciated the thought.

Eren didn't even react to the whole situation, still preferring to ride as far away as possible from her. Sakura had hoped that their shared status as suspicious soldiers would open a conversation and allow her to explain the situation, away from her teammates, but she had been too naive and optimistic in that area.

Petra's attempts at comfort were extremely awkward, though. She obviously wanted to apologize before giving her opinion, but Sakura wasn't making it easy for her, looking away whenever she tried to make eye contact or starting conversation with another team member whenever Levi was not nearby. Maybe she was acting childish and overly resentful, but this whole mess had been started because she couldn't trust her five minutes with Eren.

It was even worse than that time Amina had tricked her into catching those titans.

But she would have to forgive her eventually. Levi had made it very apparent that he was expecting his team to be fully ready in less than a month, or else he would be kicking her off the team, and she trusted his word. Though, in any case, shouldn't he be kicking _Petra _out, since she started this fight to begin with? She had been acting like an exemplary soldier until now, showing no deference to Eren and understanding her superiors' orders, but here she was getting the threats and the order to fix a mess she hadn't even started.

Haruto snorted and started moving his neck up and down, what he usually did whenever he was thirsty. Sakura frowned and felt her already irritable mood getting even worse. Hadn't he drank water thirty minutes ago? It wasn't even that hot to begin with.

Levi turned around and scrunched his nose. "I guess we're in need of another break," he drawled. "Haruto must be annoyed that he's been reduced to carrying criminals."

Sakura's shoulders stiffened and she resisted the urge to growl. That didn't even make sense. If he wanted to convince the squad that she committed the crime, he would have to make it less annoying and more believable. If anything, he should kick out Petra, since she started this awkwardness. Without Petra, the only one around who would need some talking would be Eren.

Her team shot her apologetic looks and followed the Captain's orders, everyone dismounting their horses rather awkwardly. Eren seemed almost ecstatic to complete Levi's orders without even looking at Sakura, feeling like an exemplary soldier. She sincerely hoped Eren's admiration for Levi had not blinded him enough that he believed she really was the culprit. Though he could be a bit of a hothead, Eren wasn't stupid. Though maybe his resentment towards her was clouding his judgement.

Levi led Isabel to the perimeter of their little circle, not before stopping in front of Haruto and Sakura and shooting her a glare. "Eren, I don't think you can afford having bad influences. Come with me and take her horse for a drink."

Eren perked up further and took Haruto's reins, wasting no time and following Levi to a nearby stream she had heard for the last fifteen minutes. He was just grating on her nerves even further. He was taking this to the extreme. By now he would probably alienate himself from the team, and if that happen how would Squad Levi function?

As soon as Levi and Eren were out of an earshot, Gunther starting looking around with a nervous look. "Is it me or is the Captain acting a bit more of an... Uh..."

"Asshole?" Petra quipped, crossing her arms and looking visibly annoyed. "No, you're not the only one who noticed."

Gunther sighed and chuckled, relaxing slightly. "I don't know how I feel about this. He obviously doesn't think you did it, and you haven't been a bitch to him in a long time, so he has no warrant to act like this."

Sakura raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "What makes you say so? The Captain has made it very clear I'm a criminal."

"The Captain may have a criminal past, but he's very intelligent and sharp," Eld explained. "Those two little things of evidence would never hold up anywhere. Besides the fact you stayed the night here."

She shrugged. "I could've escaped during the night."

Oluo scoffed. "No, you wouldn't."

"What makes you so sure?"

"Because Petra staked you all last night and she would've said something by now."

Sakura stiffened and immediately looked at Petra, who was now curiously avoiding her gaze. She had stayed outside her room last night? Well, that certainly explained the heavy bags in her eyes, but why had she done that?

The whole team was also looking at her rather curiously, and Petra sighed in exasperation under the weight of their gazes, her arms dropping by her side. "I tried to say something at first, but the Captain shut me up. I confided in him afterwards, that I knew you hadn't left your room and there were no windows, but he didn't answer."

"Then the question is, why is he doing all of this? There must be a reason," Eld spoke, his sentence not particularly aimed at anyone.

Petra finally looked at Sakura in understanding, but the kunoichi only narrowed her eyes further. "I think I know why," she said slowly.

"Huh? Do tell, Petra. Can't have a shy wife now, can I?"

She glared at Oluo in annoyance, but her shoulders slumped and her head lowered when she looked back at Sakura, who was now glaring murderously at her.

Their teammates jumped slightly once they noticed the tension between the two. "Holy shit," Gunther spoke up. "What happened?"

"Why don't you ask _her_," Sakura said venomously.

Oluo blinked and alternated between staring at Petra and Sakura, obviously confused. "Okay, I think I'm scared now. I've seen you rip people's throats out if you heard someone talk to Petra in the tone you just used now."

The brown-haired woman winced and bit her lip. "I made a big mistake last night. I think he wanted to give us an incentive to talk about the problem."

Eld drawled, "So you think the Captain has been acting like a major ass during this whole trip give you a time to apologize? I find that hard to believe."

"No, he's doing this to improve our team chemistry," Sakura finally said. "Uniting against a common enemy. In this case, him. And maybe also test how strong our bonds are. I'm not expecting ––and I don't want–– an apology."

Before she wanted to play along with Levi's plan, neither confirming nor denying his suspicions of her, but she didn't see the harm in stopping Levi's little game of making her the pariah of the team. He had already proven his point that Squad Levi stuck together through better or worse. Besides, she would take this opportunity to spoil his fun and start devising the perfect payback for the last two miserable hours.

"C'mon, Sakura, don't be that mean," Gunther chastised gently. "Petra's very remorseful about whatever she did. I'm sure you can forgive her, right?"

"Please," she pleaded. "I... It's not that I don't trust you, because I do. I just know how much you love your siblings and how much you would do for them that I just... panicked. I guess I felt that you would choose him over us. And I wanted to stop you before you did."

"Did I ever give you that impression?" she retorted harshly. "Since when have I given any evidence that I would choose either side?"

"During the trial you were so _angry_. You couldn't see your face, of course, but I was right there next to you at all times. And even if you had chosen Eren last night, I would've stuck with you, Sakura. I wouldn't have said anything, I promise. I would've tried to convince you to stay with us, but in the end it's your choice and I would've let you go. I just wanted to talk... but I know I was wrong now."

The squad was quiet after Petra's outburst, but the silence was not cold and judgmental but rather understanding, at least for everyone except Sakura. She had thought her teammates would be outraged by the injustice her best friend had done to her, but instead they looked sympathetic, as if they had thought the same thing Petra had. Sakura knew that they hadn't explicitly sided with anyone, but she still felt rather hurt that they didn't trust Eren.

"There are no sides in this," she said, addressing everyone. "Eren is not an enemy of humanity. There's no reason for you guys to think I would betray you for him when we're on the same side."

"But that's the problem, Sakura," Petra continued, her voice a bit harsher. "We don't know yet if he's an enemy. I like Eren, I won't lie, and so far he's done a great first impression, but that's it. _You _know him, but for everyone else on the team, he's a fifteen-year-old who can turn into a titan at will, and it's possible he has no conscious thought over his movements. That scares me, Sakura. It scares everyone. Your brother gives people nightmares."

"We're giving him a chance, we promise," Eld continued, "but you can't expect us to get rid of our suspicions in just one day. Give us some time, okay? Before you know it, everything will be back to normal. Eren will be just as vital to our team as everyone else."

She stared at each of her teammates, their faces mirroring their agreement with Eld's words, and felt the anger slowly leaving her body. Before, she had thought Levi had only felt the change between her and Eren and Petra, but now she was growing convinced he had sensed this mentality with the rest of the squad. Was that why he had been such a shit this whole time, because he knew that her teammates didn't fully trust her and he gave them a reason to address the problem?

If so, she had been a fool and had little reason to be angry at any of them. Unlike Eren, they probably knew why she was acting so coldly towards him and why it was tearing her apart. She hadn't given them much evidence that she would be able to objectively look at the mission, at least not the same way Levi knew.

"Fine," she sighed. "I understand your points. I'll give you guys some time to make your own judgments about Eren. But I want some trust in exchange. You guys say you don't know Eren, and I respect that, but all of you know _me_, and that should be reason enough to know what I am and am not capable of. And I'm _not _betraying any of you for any reason."

"Deal," Oluo replied immediately. "I mean, I never doubted you, Pinky. You're too much of a scaredy cat to do anything."

"Watch it, old man. Don't think I've forgotten about the bet you lost."

His eyes widened and his cheeks flushed, his whole body mortified by the prospect of confessing Petra his love. Gunther and Eld guffawed, aware of the situation, and poor Petra was the only one left out of the loop, her confused face begging for someone to explain her the inside joke.

When Levi and Eren came back after a particularly long absence, they encountered rather constipated faces, as if his squad was trying to reign in their laughter, and Levi could gained a foreboding that what he had done for his team would come bite him in the ass later on.

* * *

><p><em>Sebastian,<em>

_My captain glared at me for a solid five minutes because of this letter. I had to lie to him that you didn't know anything. Well, considering your intellect, it isn't much of a lie. How did you find out where I was staying? I'm pretty sure my location is a top military secret. I've got half a mind to report this, but since you're a friend and all of that, I think I'll let it slide._

_I'm glad you got the recognition you deserve for that piece. I've heard you play it before and it was wonderful. I'm sure you left the crowd shocked by how good your performance was. I would've told them a few explicit words if they hadn't given you any recognition, but, let's be honest, the dirt under their feet is worth more than me. Nobles have it so easy._

_You can tell Amina's father that your inside sources say Amina is fine. She visited two days ago and told me how things were going with her work. Even though one of her most rewarding and time-consuming projects was unfortunately terminated around two weeks ago. It wasn't pretty, but she's pulling through. They're trying to get the higher-ups to approve the same project once again, but with this mess going on, I don't think it's going to happen any time soon. I know that she refuses to ask the Burgeis family any help, but if you can let is slip to the Lord and Lady Burgeis, that would be great. I know that they're fond of their only granddaughter._

_Your nightmares won't go away, Sebastian. They will keep coming, and the more you ignore them the more perturbed you'll be. Have you thought about talking to someone about it? Writing to me does not replace having someone actually listen to you about these things. Trust me, once I confessed a deeply shameful act I committed to Amina and Petra and they only supported me. That's not to say I'm still not ashamed of what I did, but I do feel better. It's even less complicated with you, because what you're feeling is very understandable. Do keep in mind that the person you choose to talk to will be able to sympathize, but never will empathize with you. I'm sure the inner circle has never seen a titan, much less seen it do what you saw that day._

_They don't have titans about being eaten by titans, remember that. They don't know true fear._

_I'm glad to know you're staying inside Sina for a bit longer. I don't know much about districts, to be honest, so I don't know where Ehrmich is. I'm surprised you're not staying in Mitras, though. Disgusted by the way of life, or is there something bugging you? I'm not afraid to say the monarchy annoys me for many reasons, particularly their fear of the outside. Even if its infested with titans, outside the walls is so beautiful you must witness it at least once in your life. If you're good, I'll take you and personally act as your body guard._

_From my end, things have been going... worse than what I expected. Fine, I admit it, and no, it's not because you're not here. Getting a bit too ahead of yourself there, _buddy_. Without divulging too many secrets, I'm in a bit of an uncomfortable position with my team. I can't really talk to them that much. Even if we worked out our problems around two weeks ago, everything is cold._

_Okay, fine, you win, I'll tell you a bit about what's going on. You do know about Eren Jaeger, right? How could you not, the noble families were after his blood even after the trial. It was only because of Amina and the Burgeis that they gave it a rest. Anyway, a little less known secret is that Eren Jaeger is my adoptive brother. And though this isn't known in the general populace, it is _very _known in the Survey Corps. And it is also well known in the Survey Corps that I'm very protective over my siblings._

_Yeah, those two don't mix well together in my line of work. I don't have much contact with regular soldiers since I'm in the Special Operations Squad, so I don't have to deal with too many dark looks. But, sometimes, I wish I could take those dark looks over the looks my friends give me sometimes. I mean, in the surface, we're still the same. We laugh and joke and make fun of each other and fight, but I can tell it's all fake. Or, at least, forced. I don't know how to describe it, I've never dealt with something like this before in my life. Now that I look back to it, my life has always been simple: train, go out on expeditions, survive, come back, repeat. Friendship came naturally because we survived together, creating bonds I thought were unbreakable._

_But maybe I'm being too harsh on my team. You have no idea how much we hate titans. The inner walls probably have never had to experience living with the fear of titans, but the Survey Corps is well-acquainted with it. Many friends and comrades have been eaten by titans. I've witnessed my old squad crumble to them. Two of my senior teammates saved my life and were eaten as a result. And now, we're housing a titan in our basement, protecting him. At least, that's what my teammates think. They don't see a ten-year-old brat who tried to sneak up on me any time of the day or sometimes made me do his chores for him. They weren't there when he lost his mom. They haven't seen the fire burn in his eyes whenever he says he'll exterminate the titans._

_I agreed to give them some time to see Eren like I see him, but I'm getting impatient. Does it really take this long to realize that Eren is not a titan and won't eat us all? He's been so nice to them (not me, but he has a reason for that) this whole entire time, and they still keep them at arm's length. They smile at him, but whenever he's about to put his hand close to his mouth, they all tense. I can't act like if nothing's wrong with people who treat my brother like that, but at the same time I can't blame them or be angry at them. Either way, it's not fair._

_Surprisingly, the person who trusts Eren the most, besides me, is Captain Levi. Yeah, the guy who beat him to a pulp in front of everyone in the courtroom trusts Eren more than sunshine Petra. Sometimes, when I'm feeling overly sentimental, I swear he sees Eren as a human. He even told Eren that should he lose control of his power, we would try to keep him alive by cutting his limbs... Yeah, I know, that doesn't sound too trusting, but believe me it's better than killing him. He's still an asshole, but I have to admit that he has a few redeeming qualities, this being one of them._

_Alright, this letter got sappy really fast. Better cut it out before I confess some embarrassing childhood stories. I don't know if I'll still be in this station by the time you write back, so maybe you'll have to pull some strings to send me a letter again. You're lucky I can read and write, though. You took a risk for this, but I appreciate it. _

_I wish you the best,_

_Sakura_

_P.S. Yes, I'm still mad at you because of that corny line you said, and no, it didn't embarrass me. You imagined that blush._

* * *

><p><strong>AN-<strong>

**Many of you guys have asked for an AU and many of you guys have praised how closely The Vessel follows canon. Now, at first I didn't think mixing these two different mindsets was possible, but I found a way to make it work. The Vessel was naturally going to deviate into AU realm in the future, but I'm not doing it abruptly. It's going to happen subtly, and, yes, the mysterious framing is one of the first major AU elements of this story, even if it isn't too big.**

**I hope Levi's motives for playing the asshole didn't confuse you guys. Sakura presented many different theories from her thoughts, but if you're still confused PM me or leave a review and I'll respond with an explanation.**

****Updates will now be farther in between and have no set schedule considering I started college. I'm an engineering major and I don't have any ****of those fluff classes yet. And yes, reviews do help motivate writers on this site, that's why we ask for them. However, I do refuse to post a chapter of The Vessel unless it's at least 7k words long (w/o including the AN), even if it means updating faster. I can't develop a good chapter unless it has a good length to it.**

**Yet again, an enormous amount of thanks to TheCrazyAnimeFan, Strife666, mun3litKnight, BLacKxBUrN, Black snake eyes, necrofantasia, AmeRaSora, Guest, PrincessFuFU, Love Remedy, Sincerely Athena, animagirl, KuroAka, Tainted Heroine, Chienna, Chikui, FairiesDescent, Basia Orci, MiniRoonie, A Dark Leopardess in Shadows, Q-asta, cherryblossom1423, Valkarious, Aka-chansama, katy bae, KasonSama, BlossomSakuraCherry, Pirotessa, No Name, hotredsakura1315, KiraKiraBluemoon, Haru, Mako, Xoraan, YaoiLuv, KL, DeathNoteRocks, ForeheadGirl, Fanfic Obsession, 24AbbyS, and Amantedelacomida. You guys are awesome and encouraged me to get this chapter out.**


	16. Limit

_Three weeks before the 57th Expedition_

"Petra, where are the logs of the previous expeditions?"

The brown-haired woman looked up from her desk, her hazel eyes surprised. Sakura barely started conversations with her, and to see her around Petra's room was almost unheard of. Even if they had talked about what happened with her snooping days ago, the second-in-command still felt awkward around her. But she couldn't make such a big deal out of having a conversation with Sakura or she could possibly run away. "They're in the office by the east corridor. Why?"

"The Captain wants to go over the expedition statistics to tell the new recruits this weekend. Commander Erwin wants the speech to be true."

She frowned at the rather empty green gaze and black bags underneath her eyes. She was also sweaty and her white clothes dirty, indicating a long training session. One thing that had not been resolved was Sakura's relationship with Eren, and it was taking an obvious toll on her. Petra couldn't help but feel guilty, even if she hadn't forced Sakura to say those things, because seeing her best friend so defeated was unbearable for her.

While Sakura had been accused of killing Sonny and Bean, everyone in the Survey Corps knew she had been framed for it, and thus it hadn't come off as a surprise that the second-in-command had been chosen to come along with Petra to the ceremony where the 104th Trainees Squad would choose their faction. Erwin always chose prominent figures from his army to inspire safety and ambition in the new recruits, and there was nobody who did not know about Sakura Ackerman, the prodigious titan-killer. And while her stellar record was currently marred by an impending investigation, almost nobody from the recruits was aware of this smudge.

"When are we leaving?" she asked amicably, hoping to drag the conversation a bit longer, even if she already knew exactly when they were leaving.

Sakura frowned slightly, but the indifference soon came back and the displeasure disappeared from her face. "Tomorrow morning," she replied in a monotone and quickly left the room, clearly unable to stand being in her presence for longer.

Petra sighed and buried her face in both her hands. Her teammates wanted to talk to Sakura but she always refused to make a meaningful conversation. She spent most of her time in the forest, away from prying eyes, and returned sweaty and tired, her 3DMG empty of fuel. Petra had offered to come practice with her, but she always refused, claiming that she preferred to practice alone. That was untrue; Sakura always relished to be in a team, even if Levi naturally wished to work solo.

Someone knocked on the door again, and she jumped when she saw growing green eyes, only for them to revert back to Eren's teal eyes. She had never seen Eren in his titan form, but she had heard humors of a pointy-eared beast with glowing green eyes and fuming mouth. She knew she was being irrational, but Eren had always scared her, and she wasn't sure if there would be a moment where he wouldn't.

"Hey Petra!" he greeted with a wide smile. For someone who could turn into a monster, the boy was sure happy most of the time. "Have you seen Oluo? He promised we would work on my 3DMG today."

She frowned and looked outside the window. The sun was still up, but not for much longer. Any training session required at least thirty minutes of warmup, and by the time Eren and Oluo actually got to practice, sunset would almost be upon them. A veteran such as Oluo was capable of practicing in the night, but Eren was not only a rookie but also untrustworthy. If he transformed in the middle of the night, help may not come to Oluo in time and that was not a risk she was willing to take, not with Oluo of all people.

"Don't you think it's a little too late for that?" Petra asked in her most caring tone. "Night is still off-limits for a rookie like you."

Eren pouted. "I graduated fifth in my class; I'm not a rookie."

"And I graduated third but the night was still prohibited for my first three months. And you are most definitely a rookie."

He chuckled and raised his hands in placation. "True, true, I'll just tell him to do it tomorrow."

"Tomorrow is patrol day."

Eren shuddered. "Patrol day with Captain Levi. What exactly are we looking for?"

"Out in here we take over the job of the Garrison, so we just look for people who need help and to preserve the peace. Shouldn't be too bad as long as you're quiet."

"And you're not coming with us because you're going to get new recruits, right?"

"Yeah."

"You have a strong batch this year, I know it."

The kids did fight in the Battle of Trost, so by now they were already survivors. The new Survey Corps recruits –– if there were any –– would come mentally prepared for their future. But was such preparedness worth all the pain they witnessed? Would she herself have been different if something like Trost had happened to her before she made her decision to join the Survey Corps?

Petra shook her head; no use in thinking about that now.

"You have no idea," he replied with a grin. "I'll see you at dinner!" And with that he left, slamming the door shut out of excitement.

She groaned and looked at her half-finished letter. Should he tell her father about her screwup with Sakura? He might offer some advice to help rebuild their friendship. Besides, he was fond of Sakura. Her stubbornness and protective nature was reminiscent of Petra's mother. Even when she fell sick, she refused to let Petra do any straining household chores. By the end of the illness, her dad would stay home and help with the housework meanwhile Petra watched her mom wither away.

Their only comfort is that there was nothing they could've done differently that would've saved her.

_Mother would be so disappointed in me,_ she thought with a sad smile. _But at the same time, I __can't be blinded by Sakura's bias. Eren is a threat, and he could harm someone in the group, like Oluo or Levi._

Was this how she was going to justify her sneaking around? Though more horrible acts have been done for lesser threats in times of war. They have been in times of war for a long time, and she's tired, so very tired, as if the memories of humanity were weighing upon her along with all the strife and struggle of one hundred years of imprisonment.

She blinked slapped some sense into her system. Now she was just being silly. She should just go back to writing her letter to her father, though she wasn't sure how to continue since she had been interrupted by two of the most conflicting people she currently knew. She should probably mention them last, at least until she could decide what to write about.

Perhaps now was as good as any time to confess her devotion to her captain and hint her romantic feelings towards him. She didn't bring it up often, considering Sakura didn't seem so approving and she had forbidden her from telling Oluo a long time ago about her feelings. Not that she would've done it, anyway. Telling Oluo that she was in love with Levi seemed... uncomfortable. Telling Sakura that she loved Levi felt normal, but telling Oluo the same phrase felt wrong. Even if lately he had been annoying the hell out of her by acting like Levi or saying that she was doomed to stay with him... Though the last phrase didn't necessary make her upset.

Petra sighed and placed her quill on the inkwell. Nobody can write on an empty stomach.

She hummed her way to the dinner table, admiring the old stonework of their old headquarters. She wasn't quite sure why they had abandoned this outpost, considering it in the southern part of the walls, but at least she got to live here even for a short while.

Oluo was finishing setting up the table meanwhile Eld was serving the dinner, a delicious pork stew Rosa had taught him a long time ago. There were only two people she liked having on cooking duty: Sakura and Eld. Eren was okay, but the boy sometimes overcooked the food. Gunther was great at eating but not so much at cooking, which could explain why he's hungry most of the time. Her father had always done most of the cooking, so Petra wasn't overly masterful at cooking. Oluo just had no excuse or redemption, and even Levi had prohibited him from doing the team meals.

Rosa had taught Eld how to cook, and he had proven a worthy pupil. His food was tasty and plentiful to the degree she was always satisfied and content when he cooked. Sakura knew a couple of foreign dishes befitting her foreign background, but she also knew some Shiganshina favorites. She even took the effort to go fish or hunt before dawn just to get the team fresh fish or game.

The whole team sat down in their respective seats, with Levi at one head and Sakura at the other. Eren always sat at the corner of the table closest to Levi, meanwhile Petra sat at Sakura's right. Oluo was adamant in seating in front of Petra, even if she secretly thought he had a crush on Levi, and Eld and Gunther took the remaining seats in Levi's right and left, respectively.

There hadn't been much thought behind their seating arrangement, but Petra couldn't help but notice how they reflected the team's current relationships.

Once Levi started eating, the rest of the team followed suit. Almost all of them hummed in delight at the delicious food, everyone but Levi and Sakura, who remained stone-faced. Sometimes Petra wondered if she would've also fallen in love with Sakura had she been male considering the similarities she had with Levi.

But for some reason she couldn't see that happening.

"Ackerman and Petra, remember that you're leaving before dawn. The ceremony starts at nightfall but I don't want you to be overconfident."

"Yessir," Petra replied happily, while Sakura only grunted in agreement. "Why are we just doing the Trost ceremony?"

"Erwin is especially interested in getting recruits from this particular location, so he wants very skilled soldiers to inspire confidence, but he also knows you're needed here for your own mission. So we chose this ceremony for your appearance."

Eren accidentally looked at Sakura, but he quickly diverted his attention towards Petra. She noticed Sakura's hand clench her spoon tighter. "Oh, so you're going to try to recruit my friends?"

She nodded. "You spoke highly of them."

"They all have qualities. Especially my sister, Mikasa. Well, adopted sister. She's really her sister." He pointed at Sakura, barely giving her any eye contact, and went back to eating his stew. Even if he was angry at Sakura, there was something suspicious about how quickly he said that sentence.

Gunther whistled. "Mikasa Ackerman? I heard she was worth a hundred soldiers in the Battle of Trost. But I remember her having black hair and gray eyes. You don't really look alike, do you?" Seeing as Sakura continued eating instead of responding, Gunther added, "Well, you're certainly talented, so there's no question you belong to the same family."

Sakura swallowed her stew and drank a small gulp of her water. "I know, we get that a lot."

The rest of the dinner went on without much meaningful conversation besides Gunther and Oluo talking about new 3DMG strategies and Eren listening like the attentive puppy he was.

Eld cooked and Oluo set up the dinner table, so it was up to Gunther and Sakura to clean up. The rest of the team filed away in chatter, but Petra lingered, trying to find an excuse to stay with Sakura. She was about to open her mouth and offer her help when someone tapped her on the shoulder. She whirled around and almost gasped when she saw Levi looking at her with bored gray eyes.

"I need to talk to you."

Her heart started beating faster and her mouth dried, so she only nodded in response. Levi beckoned her to follow her, and she moved her legs with difficulty, as if they were made of lead. Why did Levi want to talk to her? He didn't know about her feelings for him, did he? That would be catastrophic, seeing as how she was more than positive Levi did not reciprocate her feelings.

She couldn't handle a rejection right now.

He opened the door to his new office, a room relatively far away from the more populated halls, and closed it softly after her. Levi took a seat and Petra took the hint to go stand in front of his desk.

He interlinked his fingers and placed his chin on top of them, his eyes deep in thought. He sighed and murmured, "There is something I need you to do. It's about Ackerman."

"What about her?"

"We have a feeling that the person who framed Ackerman is one of the rookies," Levi confessed, his eyes serious and grave. "I need you to be on the lookout for suspicious characters."

Petra frowned in confusion. "Not that I'm incapable of this mission, but why don't you ask Sakura? She's much more observant than I am."

"Ackerman already has a lot on her mind. She's not at her best at the moment."

She thought about the last week, about how mentally exhausted Sakura always looked, and couldn't help but agree with the Captain's assessment. "I'll look for the suspicious characters."

"Thank you, Petra."

It was then that an old question resurfaced in her mind, a question that had always burned in her mind but she had never found the correct time and place to ask. Now was as good as ever. "Captain, why do you call Sakura 'Ackerman'? You always call us all by our first names."

Levi sighed and unlaced his fingers, laying them flat against the table. Petra knew he was older than them despite his youthful appearance, but right now whatever stress he was going through added many years to his face. "Distance," the Captain cryptically answered. "You're dismissed."

Petra gave a stiff salute and left the office, slightly perturbed. Why would the Captain want to distance himself from Sakura? Was she someone dangerous? But she was so protective of all of them, why would she ever want to harm them?

She sighed and entered her room, the unfinished letter not visible in the night. Perhaps she should finish after she comes back from the recruitment trip with Sakura, when her thoughts are less of a jumble.

* * *

><p><em>Two weeks before the 57th <em>_Expedition_

Sending chakra to her blade and keeping it stable always tested her control, but she was finally getting better at it. The idea of mixing her ninja skills with her 3DMG had come to her almost a year and a half ago, but advancements had been slow and cumbersome due to a lack of privacy. But now that her team was alone and she had a giant forest at her disposal, Sakura relished every moment she could enhancing her 3DMG skills.

She could infuse her blade with wind chakra to increase cutting power or water chakra to increase range, but that was as far as her skill went. She had tested mixing both wind and water to create an insanely powerful sword, but she couldn't use her chakra coils to channel two different natures at the same time. It was as if she was trying to look forward and backward at the same time.

Then there was the using jutsu whilst fighting, but that part was proving impossible for Sakura. Moving in midair required using the 3DMG, and thus her hands were occupied. She was skilled enough to glide with only one hand, but hand seals required two hands. If there were enough titans, she could technically jump from titan to titan, killing them quickly and efficiently, but that was dangerous and she wasn't sure how she would be able to pull it off. She had come to the conclusion that if she wanted to use jutsu against titans then she would either have to be in a forest or on top of Haruto.

But that did not dissuade her from practicing. Nothing would dissuade her from improving herself, especially when she was directly responsible for Eren's life. The veterans had managed to recruit many soldiers from Trost, more than what they had expected, and these included Mikasa and Armin. She couldn't do anything for their immediate protection since she was in the Special Operations Squad, but she could do something for Eren.

And, even if her team had disappointed her this past week, she still fervently remembered the promise she had made to herself when they themselves joined the Survey Corps. She swore to protect them, and her resentment towards them would not come in the way of her love and duty.

Sakura stored chakra in her feet and jumped impossibly far and cut the foam part of the titan's nape, then backflipped and sent one of her hooks to one of the trees behind her. But, instead of landing in one of the branches, she used more gas to give her more momentum, let go of the hook, and landed on one of the hidden wooden titans and slashed it with a last minute chakra-enhanced blade, obliterating the wooden titan.

She sighed, backflipped and landed on the ground, the force of the fall easily absorbed by her ninja body. She could do all of this, but was it enough to keep everyone safe until retirement? She had lost half of her team once to an onslaught of titans, and almost lost Amina and Moblit as well. Then again, she hadn't been willing to show her full ninja power, but maybe she should change that. Maybe she should show her full might and inspire confidence amongst her comrades.

No, that wouldn't do. Eren had shown his full power and was instead regarded as an enemy. Then again, he was a _titan_ meanwhile she was a ninja; there was a difference. The question was would people understand that difference or be blinded by their fear?

Sakura frowned and stared at the sky, or at least the parts of it not obstructed by the rather tall trees. Lunch would be served soon; maybe it had already been served, and she had missed it. Nobody had called her or searched for her, but perhaps that was for the best. After all, she was still branded as a possible threat and had to play the role. That didn't mean she couldn't eat with them, so she started trudging back to the camp they had made to test Eren's titan-shifting ability.

She was still unsure on why anyone would want to frame her for the killings of Sonny and Bean. For someone of their skill, they had been quite careless in the evidence they had planted, especially because someone of above average intelligence could quickly surmise it was all a ruse. Someone with high enough skill to avoid detection of dozens of soldiers couldn't possibly be dimwitted, so there must be another reason for the framing.

Though here everyone was thinking that the framer was a soldier, but what if they are a ninja, like her? It certainly answered the question why the killer had targeted her for the framing. The idea would've been inconceivable for someone like Erwin, who had never heard of ninjas, but Sakura knew better. She hadn't felt any chakra signatures similar to hers, but that she still did not completely write off the idea, considering she couldn't detect chakra any farther than three kilometers. And if the person was a ninja and she got to them first, she would definitely ask questions about her origins. What if her people were beyond the walls, and she was stuck here fighting a war that was not hers?

Sakura sighed and slapped herself lightly in the face. No, her people, her family, were inside the walls. Blood relations meant nothing compared to the bonds she had made here. Besides, even if she found them, she doubted her amnesia would magically disappear. Grisha had told her a long time ago that she would regain her memories in a year or two, and he couldn't have been farther from the truth. Sakura had other pressing worries, like titans and her loved ones in danger, but her amnesia would always be in the back of her mind. There were more than sixteen years of memories she couldn't access. That was disconcerting.

From the site of the camp she heard a most peculiar sound, one she had never heard. Before she could think about the origin of the noise, she heard her teammates yell in astonishment.

Her eyes widened and she used her 3DMG to arrive back to the headquarters as soon as possible. As soon as she landed in the clearing she gasped in surprise not at the titan arm a few yards away from her, but at the drawn swords from her teammates, each of them threatening to attack Eren. Petra unsurprisingly begged Levi to leave Eren's side, but the Captain was sure in his position in front of Eren, protecting him from everyone else.

She ran towards them and almost pushed Gunther out of the way when Levi looked at her and shook his head. She grit her teeth and clenched her fists, because she knew what Levi wanted and agreed with him, but it didn't make it any less painful to witness. Petra was blinded by her love for Levi that she did not see Eren trying to remove his arm from the titan arm. Oluo was of course on Petra's side, because he would follow her to death if he could. Gunther had always been suspicious of Eren, and Eld had no qualms to follow the team's precedent.

Sakura took a step back and allowed the scene to continue, but her muscles were taut and ready to go off at the smallest stimulus. She trusted in Levi's plan to break the distrust in the group, but she wouldn't allow any of them to lay a hand on Eren, especially when he was defenseless.

Eventually Eren managed to retrieve his arm from the titan arm and they backed off, but the damage had already been done. The false image they had lulled Eren into, the accepting squad, had shattered and the titan-shifter was shaken.

"See, I was in no danger," Levi finally declared, his attention aimed primarily at Petra. She blushed and nodded. "Eren, go back to your room. We'll call you for dinner."

The boy nodded absentmindedly and almost fled from the scene and into the woods. Sakura didn't even look at Levi for approval and immediately ran after him, calling out his name, but he didn't slow down. Once she was sure nobody was watching, she increased her speed with the help of chakra and quickly caught up and stopped him by grabbing his forearm.

Eren tried to free himself but failed under Sakura's iron grip. She walked in front of Eren until she was facing him, careful to not let go of him. He breathed heavily, his nostrils flared, and his eyes had the beginnings of tears. He was angry, scared, but above all betrayed, and her heart broke to see her brother hurt.

And even though he understood that he had been betrayed, he still would not look at her.

"Eren," she pried gently, carefully relaxing her grip on his forearm and moving her hand downwards to encase his hand in her own. "We need to talk about this."

"Why would I want to talk about this with you? You're the first one who told me you didn't trust me!" His eyes widened and he chuckled in such a self-deprecating manner that her heart hurt. "At least you were upfront about it and not like the rest of them who just made me think they trusted me."

"About that... Eren, I never meant any of those words."

"Of course you meant those words. Of course you're gonna think like ––"

Her grip on his hand tightened almost painfully. "Eren Jaeger, there are many things I tolerate in life, but people interrupting me is not one of them." He frowned heavily but nodded. "Now, when I say I never meant those words, you better believe I never meant those words, because I would never lie to you unless it was for your own protection."

His frown changed from one of anger to confusion. "Protection?"

"People already had their doubts about me being in the same group as the one in charge of damage control. They thought I wouldn't kill you if need be. And they were right, because under no circumstances would I allow that to happen. But I needed to seem impartial, and I needed to tell you that before you thought I was against you, but Petra eavesdropped into our conversation. The rest... Well, you experienced the fallout firsthand."

Eren blinked and was quiet for a long time, replaying the event in his mind and finding the truth in Sakura's words, because he distinctly remembered thinking Petra seemed quite nice and hardworking for cleaning areas that weren't even assigned to her. But there was still something that didn't make sense in his mind. "Why didn't you tell me before? Why wait until now, when I _know _everyone is against me?"

Sakura let go of his hand, though she noticed the slight twitch in his, as if he missed the contact. "First of all, everyone is not against you. The Captain is strangely fond of you, actually. He's probably lecturing our team as we speak, and they'll come around eventually. Second... Well, I did want to tell you, but you're such a hothead you would've found reasons to disprove me, even if I'm right." She smiled in wryly. "Besides, I gotta admit I was a bit angry at you for being so stubborn that my pride wouldn't let me talk to you."

Eren gave a short bark of laughter, and a tear unwittingly left its cradle, then another. Sakura placed her hands on both his cheeks and wiped his tears with her thumb gently, and at seeing her small, comforting smile, he broke down and embraced her, resting his head down on her shoulder and sobbing. Sakura quickly retrieved her hands from his face and returned the embrace, running soothing circles in his back.

"Why?" he whispered between hiccups. "I never wanted any of this. I never wanted this power."

"Yes, you did," Sakura responded truthfully, but gently. "You wanted the power to change the world and you got it. It'll just take time getting used to the differences this power of yours brings."

Eren nodded slowly but did not reply, opting to let the rest of his tears flow. Sakura knew that he was in pain, and she was in pain too from seeing him like this, but she was inwardly happy to have him back. She had never wished their reconciliation to be like this, but she had missed hearing his voice directed to her, had missed their banter and laughter.

They held each other for minutes or hours; Sakura didn't care how much time went by. He was back, and now that the team stopped pretending to be something they're not, things would start to get better. Maybe she didn't understand why Eren only managed to transform a titan arm and why he did so, but someone would find an explanation and Eren would earn real trust, not a fake one.

He tightened his hold on her briefly and slowly untangled his arms from her waist, then released her and stepped back. His teal eyes were tinged red and his cheeks were wet, but his face was more peaceful than before.

"What about you?" he finally asked.

Sakura cocked her head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"You also have power to change the world, but you don't show it."

"My mission is not to change the world, but to keep the people I love safe. If I have to change the world for that to happen, so be it, but so far I haven't felt the need to."

"If titans disappear––"

"Titans are not the only danger in the world," Sakura interrupted. "But you're slightly right. I've been thinking about revealing my powers, but I don't think right now is the time. It would be too suspicious if a titan-shifter and a ninja did not only know each other, but had familial relationships."

Eren sighed and nodded. "Someone tried to frame you too. Do you think someone knows you're a ninja, and that's why they were after you?"

"Honestly, I don't know what anyone would gain from framing me. But enough about this, let's see if you have gotten sloppy with your hand-to-hand combat."

"But aren't you hungry?"

"I'll eat a bigger dinner when we come back."

Eren laughed and she couldn't help but laugh in response. Many days had passed since she had last felt this free and at peace. The last time was after Eren's trial, but immediately afterwards, Mikasa had sought her out and they had a rather serious fight, one that Levi had eavesdropped. Now that she looked back on it, why hadn't she been extremely upset at him for spying on her conversation? Was she being ridiculously unfair to Petra? Was she a hypocrite?

She hummed, unwittingly drawing Eren's attention. No, they had spied for different reasons. Petra had been looking for any sign that Sakura would betray them, meanwhile Levi was probably curious about the Ackerman sisters. Or maybe he really was waiting for them to finish their conversation so that he could talk to Sakura. Now that she thought about it, Levi had never once doubted Sakura's allegiance, and he had been much more accepting towards Eren than the rest of her teammates.

He was certainly one weird fellow, but who was she to judge?

Once the two of them were set up, they started warming up and soon started exchanging blows. He was a bit rusty and preferred heavy attacks compared to her more agile ones. The Training Corps's style of fighting had prevailed in his instruction over her own brand of taijutsu. Which she had expected, honestly, but Eren surprised her by still knowing his old moves and even a couple of new ones that she had never taught him.

Sakura instructed him mostly on body balance. He was quite talented, as expected as the fifth ranked member of his class, but he was still a rookie. There was a point where she slammed him against a tree bark and he accidentally cut his hand with a rough piece of tree bark, but before Sakura could even think about healing the wound, the palm of his hand started steaming and before her very eyes the skin started regenerating, not even leaving a scar.

"Reports say you regrew two limbs," Sakura murmured in wonder, trailing a finger delicately over the newly-formed skin. "I knew the information was true, but seeing it before your very eyes is a new experience."

"I can't be killed easily, yeah," he replied with a grin. "Pain is also dulled as well. So if anything happens, you don't need to worry about me."

She smiled and nodded, but inwardly she was scared. Erwin believed there were other titan-shifters out there, and he was using Eren as possible bait. The best-case scenario was that Eren was unique in his power, but in the event that another titan-shifter existed and followed them in the expedition, would Eren stand a chance against them?

He looked up at the sky and frowned. "It sure got dark really fast. We should head back."

Sakura mirrored his movements and nodded in agreement. "Let's go."

By the time they reached the castle the sky was dark and their stomachs were growling. It was Petra's turn to cook dinner and Eld's to set up the table. That meant the food should be good, which was godsend for their growling bodies. Not only that, but they were at least thirty minutes away from the headquarters, since they had specifically chosen a faraway place to not cause any trouble.

She was about to mount Haruto and Eren his unnamed mare when she remembered an important detail. "Who taught you those moves?"

Eren mounted his mare, albeit with a little bit of difficulty, and breathlessly asked, "What do you mean?"

Sakura hopped on Haruto and started him on a light trot so that she could continue conversing. "Back then, when we were sparring. I didn't teach you those moves, but they were taijutsu."

"Oh, I didn't tell you. My favorite sparring partner taught me these."

"What's his name?"

Eren chuckled and smiled softly. "Her name's Annie Leonhart. She was the best hand-to-hand combat specialist in our class. Don't tell Mikasa I said that, though."

She instantly remembered her previous suspicions on whoever had framed her, and she had suspected ninjas, but had gotten rid of the notion because there were no other ninjas. But she was the only one inside the walls who knew taijutsu, so how did Annie Leonhart know? "Do you know what military division she joined?"

"No, but I think she mentioned wanting to join the Military Brigade." Eren noticed her frown, because he who her an incredulous look. "You don't think she's a ninja right?"

Her frown deepened. That did not fit with the profile she had made. "I don't know. You were never trained to detect the differences in chakra between ninjas and civilians. Her knowing taijutsu makes me suspect her."

"Even if she were a ninja, would that be so bad? Haven't you been searching for answers this whole time?"

"I sincerely doubt there are more ninjas in here." Besides, she felt that he would think her silly for suspecting the titan-killer to be a ninja. She honestly was grasping at straws but she didn't want other people to know.

"How would you know that? You told me that you can only detect chakra detection is only a couple of kilometers wide. Besides, how else would she know taijutsu?"

"That's the point! If she's not a ninja, then how does she know taijutsu? Another ninja taught her, right? Then that means there are ninjas inside the walls. Did you ever ask her where she learned to fight like that?"

"She mentioned her dad taught her to fight, but honestly Annie was never really a chatterbox."

"Why didn't you press her for answers?"

Eren frowned at her, his eyes annoyed. "People in your life simply accept your fighting style, right?" She nodded, not really understanding his point. "It would look weird if I continued to pester Annie about the origins of taijutsu, because I _should _have no reason to suspect taijutsu. I technically _shouldn't _know taijutsu is a ninja art. So if I made my suspicions open about her being a ninja or being taught by ninjas, it would give her reason to suspect me of being a ninja or being taught by ninjas."

Sakura blinked at his foresight. She should really give the kid more credit in keeping her secret safe. "Did you ever show a taijutsu move?"

"Of course not. Neither Mikasa nor Armin did, either. We can't just ask you to trust us with your secret and then do nothing to protect it."

She grinned. "I know. Thank you. Now let's quit talking so we can gallop back to headquarters."

While she was pleased that her adopted siblings had acquired some of her intel gathering skills, she was still highly suspicious of this Annie character. If she had been truly trained by ninjas, she wouldn't have carelessly displayed her taijutsu unless she thought she would gain something out of it. Or maybe she was trying to bait other people who knew taijutsu to show their knowledge of it with the hopes of finding another ninja. Luckily none of her wards had fallen for that trick, but that didn't mean this Annie character wasn't cunning.

Maybe she was overestimating Annie. That level of planning wasn't usually seen in young teenagers.

Or maybe she had been fooled into believing that taijutsu was strictly a ninja art and there were other practitioners.

Even if they were unfounded, Eren had risen her suspicions. That none of her wards shared her suspicions meant they were probably unfounded, but then again she hadn't survived for so long being completely trusting.

By the time they arrived at the headquarters, the moon and the stars were shining brightly in the night sky. They left their horses in the stable, making sure they were comfortable for the night, and went to the dinner table. Their entrance was awkward to put it simply, since the group still felt suspicious of Eren. Sakura ignored them and sat at her spot in the table, and Eren followed her example and sat next to Levi.

The most obvious difference, besides the tension, was Hange and Moblit. Sakura thought they would've left after their experiments had proven a failure, but she was curious as to why they had remained here.

She smiled at everyone and placed a white cloth next to Sakura, then unwrapped it. "I'm glad you're all here. I found something interesting about Eren's _accidental_ transformation. What do you see here?"

"A teaspoon," Gunther answered, but it sounded a bit like a question.

"This was held by Eren's titan right arm. It hasn't been bent by heat or pressure, either. What were you thinking before the titan arm appeared?"

"I wanted to pick up the spoon."

Hange nodded, a wide grin slowly spreading on her face. "Yes, thoughts like 'I have to protect my friends from the cannonball' or 'I must plug the hole in Wall Rose' probably went through your mind, didn't they?"

Eren nodded.

"And just now you thought 'I want to pick up the spoon'. So what I believe is that you not only need the pain to transform, but also a particular goal in mind. Which means that today's transformation was unexpected but only for lack of information, and you don't lack control over your transformations."

Squad Levi looked at each other, their faces blank, and then nodded. Before Sakura could even wonder what they were planning they raised their hands to their mouths and bit harshly, so thoroughly that blood started oozing from their hands from the teeth marks.

"Oh, wow, how do you do this every time, Eren?" Eld asked, impressed.

Petra observed the blood oozing from her hand and then looked up at the titan-shifter. "We're sorry we doubted you and didn't offer you true friendship from the beginning." She turned to Sakura and smiled sadly. "Your sister was right in believing in you from the start."

"For the wrong reasons," Levi quipped. "But I'm glad you all finally saw what I saw as well.

"We'll trust you if you trust us," Oluo added. "It might take you a while, and we don't blame you if you don't."

Eren raised his hands to his face, his expression bashful. "It's okay, guys, seriously. We already got this far, even with a bunch of misunderstandings. I'm just excited to finally experience the team my sister has talked about."

Everyone turned their heads towards Sakura, her teammates and even Hange sporting a smirk. She blushed. "Oh, wow, thanks for ruining my image."

They laughed heartily, the first true laugh they had shared ever since they came to headquarters. Even Levi had a small smile, no doubt proud of himself and of his team for getting over their biases and suspicions. But, above all, he was most impressed with Eren, who barely hesitated in forgiving the team that had backstabbed him in more ways than one.

He had been right in being wary, but his gut had also been right in expecting something good from the kid.

* * *

><p><em>Day of the 57th Expedition<em>

This would mark the first time Sakura ever saw the recruits from the time Erwin asked her and Petra to come join him in the ceremony, but unfortunately she was ahead of the company meanwhile the rookies were in the back. From what she could feel, Mikasa and Armin were certainly in their midst, and that worried her. Erwin had confided in her earlier that he expected the other titan-shifter to make an appearance in this expedition, and the trap had already been set in one specific forest of giant trees. Everyone else thought they were making way to Shiganshina, towards their old home, because Eren thought important secrets hid in their basement.

Waiting for the gates to open was one of the most nerve-wracking experiences in her life, even if she had gone on almost thirty expeditions already. Before she only had herself and her rather experienced friends to worry about, but now the stakes have increased by three. And while she could personally guarantee Eren's safety, she couldn't do the same for Armin and Mikasa.

"Hey, Sakura," Eren called, breaking her from her musings. "They'll be fine. Don't worry."

She initially thought about making a snarky response, but Eren had her best interests in mind so she only smiled and nodded.

This time they were leaving from Karanase since the gate from Trost had been plugged by Eren. The people were curious, since the Survey Corps hadn't used this side in a long time, and cheered them on their way to the gates. The people were cheery after the soldiers had driven back the titans almost a month ago, an event unheard of in the history of humanity.

A man called for the gates to open and as soon as they did Erwin commanded the expedition to begin. The group rode together for a while but then promptly separated, as per the Survey Corps's strategy. Teams were usually composed of three people, and squads of one hundred, but the Squad Levi was made up one of only seven people, and they were all meant to be together.

The expedition started out normally, but every flare made Sakura's heart beat faster. They were all in the direction of Armin, and she couldn't just appear there right now. Yet the amount of black flares, that was the interesting part. It seemed as if Erwin's guess was correct, and there was another titan-shifter, but nobody else in the Survey Corps knew that.

After an hour of riding, a solder came and relayed the message that the right flank had been cut off. Levi ordered Petra to relay the message to the next team, but Sakura started finding out bit by bit about what was going on.

"Ackerman! Can you sense any titans?"

She frowned and yelled back, "No!" And since she couldn't detect titan-shifters because they were actually humans, there was no way she could know if what she was detecting was an ally or foe.

The expedition started falling apart, but there was no way Erwin was going to call them back when they had a titan-shifter after them. He had guessed they wanted Eren, but for what reason it was unknown. If they got Eren then there hope for humanity's victory was over.

So she wasn't surprised at all when Erwin ordered them to enter the Forest of Giant Trees. The trap was inside, in here, but only she, Hange's special squad, Erwin, and Levi knew about it. And out of those people, only Hange, Levi, Erwin, and Sakura knew the target for the trap. And Eren asked questions, questions that were no doubt in everyone's mind, and he couldn't get the reassurance he wanted from his teammates. That's why she rode in the front, a little behind Levi, because she could not fake the confusion everyone else was feeling.

And to make matters worse, a black flare went off from the right. A titan so inside the formation wasn't normal or lucky; it was intelligent and strong. To think that Erwin's worse scenario was correct made her shiver, but at least he had thought far enough for a trap.

"Draw your swords!" Levi ordered.

Sakura did as told, but she also slowed down Haruto's speed a little bit so that she would ride in the rear. Haruto was one of the fastest horses, mostly because he and Isabel were one of the few that lasted so long. Many horses ran away during expeditions or were killed instead of its rider. And if there was a horse that would keep a cool head in the face of a deviant, it was definitely Haruto.

A crash interrupted her mental praises and she prepared herself for a fight. A blonde, female titan appeared out of nowhere and killed one of the soldiers that was trying to kill her. Not only was she brutal, but she was fast, and there was no way she could handle her all by herself.

The squad must've not realized that, because they all urged Levi to switch to 3DMG and fight the Female Titan, but to no avail. In fact, his refusal made the squad even more hysterical. These were not the calculating squad Levi had spent years honing and training. In fact, they were acting like rookies. But maybe she would've been acting like that had she not known the true purpose of this stunt Erwin had pulled. She would've probably ignored Levi's orders and engaged the Female Titan. Maybe that was another reason why they had told her their true plan, so that she would not spoil it and kill herself in the process.

Levi became tired of hearing their hysterics and asked everyone to shut their ears. He quickly fired an acoustic sound, and the high pitched noise was especially painful for her and Haruto's ears. But the noise slowed down the Female Titan and calmed the group. Before they became emotional, Levi reminded them of their true purpose in this mission, which was protecting Eren, and ordered them to remain on horseback.

But just because the squad calmed down and understood didn't mean Eren did. In fact, he grew even more despondent when he realized Squad Levi would not engage the Female Titan. She appreciated Eren's desire to fight and protect their fellow soldiers, but he was still too young and idealistic to realize sacrifices were necessary to achieve goals.

"If Squad Levi doesn't defeat her, who will?" he demanded, his voice hoarse from screaming.

"Eren!" Sakura yelled back firmly. "Didn't you hear the Captain? That's not our mission. Now look ahead and don't look behind."

His eyes became hurt and disappointed, but those features were overtaken by a snarl. "Especially you, Sakura! You can do something! Save those people!"

She wasn't sure whether he referred to her healing or killing skills, but she still did not appreciate either reference. Didn't he understand that nobody in Squad Levi knew about her secret? Her glare was enough to make him feel guilty, but he did not stop urging the rest of Squad Levi to do something and help the people dying to protect them.

Sakura couldn't see very well from her vantage point what Eren was doing, but she guessed he was about to transform into a titan by the talk amongst the group. Surprisingly, Levi told him to do as he wished, considering there is no way of knowing the results of their actions, even if they believed them to be right. From his speech, she got that even Levi wasn't entirely sure that Erwin's plan would succeed, but to continue moving forward even with that doubt made her respect him even more.

In the end, Eren decided to move forward, a choice that she wasn't sure was the correct one anymore. The Female Titan only got faster, and Sakura seriously feared for her life with that speed. Haruto also started losing his cool and galloped harder. Would she die like this, without doing anything, following orders that even the Captain himself wasn't sure of? Should she introduce a wild card and attack the Female Titan with her ninja powers? Then again, the Female Titan was the one that had killed Sonny and Bean, according to Erwin, and had framed her as well. She must know who she is, but why?

They stepped at the checkpoint, because immediately after the Female Titan stepped on the place, Erwin ordered his soldiers to fire the hooks, almost hundreds of hooks, to capture the Female Titan. The rest of Squad Levi continued galloping just as hard, getting away from all the smoke.

She let out a small sigh of relief; for a moment she seriously thought she was going to die.

"This is where I leave you," Levi yelled. "Ackerman is in charge; take your orders from her. Keep Eren as far away from that titan, and take care of my horse!" With that he aimed a hook to an adjacent tree and went back from the direction they came from.

The rest of the group started cheering, and even Sakura couldn't help but laugh with them. They rode for at least twenty kilometers, putting a good distance between them and the Female Titan. Once they reached a suitable place, she ordered the Squad to tie their horses to a a couple of trees, including Isabel, and switch to 3DMG so that they could rest in one of the wide tree branches.

"So, that was the Commander's true objective?" Oluo started.

"But why didn't he tell you veteran soldiers anything?" Eren asked.

Petra frowned and stomped her feet. "Are you saying the Commander doesn't trust us?"

Sakura chuckled. "Not exactly. Think about it. Why wouldn't Commander Erwin tell anybody about his plan?"

"He thinks there's a spy inside," Eld said, understanding dawning in his face.

"Exactly. He believed there is someone giving inside information to the enemy, namely the Female Titan. Or maybe the Female Titan is the spy herself, who knows."

"And he only told people who had been here for more than five years, because that's when the wall was breached and a spy could've gotten through," Gunther added.

"So we couldn't make the cutoff," Petra continued.

"Except for Sakura."

"How did you know, Eld?"

"You were far too calm during the expedition. And when the Captain said to not engage, you followed his orders without so much of a word. That means you knew what was going on."

Sakura smiled at him. "You're far too observant by now."

"Wait, so you knew what was going on and didn't tell us?" Oluo demanded. "Why did Commander Erwin tell _you, _anyway? You don't fit the five year deadline and you were even framed for killing Sonny and Bean."

"It's exactly because I was framed for killing Sonny and Bean that they told me. They thought that whoever was the spy had something against me, or knew about the sensor abilities. And that was why they decided to tell me the plan."

"You didn't have to tell us," Petra said with understanding eyes. "It would've looked bad if––"

The most horrendous scream cut Petra off, one that made the hairs in the back of her hair stand up.

"Do... Do you think that means it's over?" Eren asked.

She furrowed her brows. She wasn't exactly sure, but it sounded like the scream of a dying animal, and Erwin's plan hadn't been to kill the Female Titan. Still, to corner her that much was a positive thing. "I don't know, but let's get ready to depart."

"I can't wait to see what that shit looks inside," Oluo said.

"We couldn't have done this without you, Eren," Petra praised, her amber eyes warm. "It's because you trusted us that we managed to capture her, so for that we have your thanks."

"Oh, don't coddle him, Petra!"

"Oluo, I would stop saying anything. You still have a bet to uphold, right?"

That shut up her rival quite quickly, and she even managed to make him blush a bright red.

"What bet?" Petra asked.

Sakura giggled, and Oluo was completely mortified, meanwhile the rest of Squad Levi only looked at them in confusion. Honestly, some of them should have an inkling that Oluo was in love with Petra.

"Is everyone ready?" Sakura asked.

"Yes!"

"Let's go back!"

Now that the team was in high spirits, there was chatter amongst the team, which usually resulted in Oluo teasing Eren and Petra calling Oluo out, and sometimes Eld teasing both Oluo and Petra. Gunther, being much more mature, asked them to stop, but also added his two cents.

It was then that Sakura felt the chakra presence of an unrecognized person following them. That made no sense, because nobody should be able to know their position, since they hadn't fired any type of flare.

The suspect still went after them, and it was then that Sakura realized they were under attack.

"Guys, we're under attack, hurry up and get away from here!"

She pinpointed the position, drew her blades, and clashed with a soldier clothed with their uniform and hood. She tried to slash with her other hand, but the spy used her 3DMG to put some space between them. Sakura thought about following her and finishing her once and for all, but she opted to join back with the group, since Eren was their priority.

"What was that?" Gunther yelled.

Sakura had no time to answer, because the sound of a transformation and a titan following them followed soon afterwards. She grit her teeth, because there was no way they would be able to beat her, at least without Levi. Even though they were elite titan killers, they had nothing on powerful titan-shifters. How had she known their position, anyway? Had she gotten lucky? No, there was no such thing as luck in this world.

"Whatever happens, keep going forward, Eren. The rest of you, follow me!"

"But, Sakura––"

"I give this order as your second-in-command. Now hurry! Everyone else, follow my lead!"

She turned around and didn't even want to see whether they were following her. She sent a hook to a tree, sheathed her swords, and body-flickered right in front of the running Female Titan, her chakra-coated punch ready. The body-flicker gave her the element of surprise and she landed her punch right in her abdomen, the force behind the punch sending the Female Titan flying at least a hundred feet and ended slamming against a tree.

However, Sakura had gone full offense, leaving no chakra to strengthen her bones, and she broke her whole right arm. Not only that, but the Female Titan was much heavier than a normal titan, probably because of the amount of muscle in her body. She hissed at the pain but quickly used her left arm to grab the left 3DMG handle and sent a hook flying to a nearby tree trunk. Once she landed on the branch, she cradled her injured arm. There was no way she would be able to heal it and fight simultaneously, so she had to step out of the fight for a bit and heal. She gingerly placed her left hand on top of her right hand, the green chakra mending her bones slowly.

Her teammates landed next to her and stared at her with gaping mouths and wide eyes. It was time they had found out her secret, she had just hoped it wouldn't be this way. "Stop looking at me like that! Hurry and defeat her before she gathers her bearings. I'll join you when I'm done healing my hand."

Her sharp, quick words snapped them out of their stupor and they wordlessly started attacking the Female Titan with renewed fervor. The blonde titan was still a bit dazed from the brutal attack Sakura had landed, but Squad Levi still took no chances and quickly incapacitated her by stabbing her eyes, depriving her from sight.

They attacked the tendons below the shoulders, incapacitating her arms, every hit a mixture of grace and lethality. Pride swept her off her feet with every attack Squad Levi landed. They were such a harmonious team, honed from years of hardship and training. To think that she seriously thought they were in mortal danger before made her feel a bit silly, especially when they were owning the Female Titan so thoroughly.

After a couple more seconds of healing she regained mobility in her arm. She had done a very rough job with her arm, so rough that every small movement made her arm hurt like a bitch, but at least now she could join her team in their assault.

She sent her 3DMG hooks to the nearest tree and rushed towards them. She had to be very careful with her powers for now. Squad Levi had never practiced with the knowledge of having a ninja amongst their ranks, and Sakura had never practiced with the knowledge of having Squad Levi helping her out. It would be a true tragedy if they died not because they weren't powerful or talented enough, but because they couldn't work together after years of training together.

Squad Levi made quick work of the Female Titan's shoulder muscles, causing her nape to now be open. Now it was the time for them to attack the nape and finish her off. Eld and Gunther signaled that they would lead the first wave of attacks, meaning that after Petra and Oluo's second wave blows, Sakura was supposed to land the killing blow. It was oddly touching, giving her the final blow. She had felt for the longest time that her team was going to shun her because she hid her powers, but here they were, giving her the satisfaction of killing the Female Titan.

Sakura started her trek towards the back of the Female Titan, not making the rookie mistake of heading straight towards her but instead making a wide circle towards the back. And maybe it was because she was so far away that she couldn't do anything, or the adrenaline of the fight had made her forget a very important and peculiar detail about the Female Titan that would've definitely changed the outcome of the fight. Because Sakura had forgotten the Female Titan had found them without any help of signal flares, and though she had thought it was coincidence, there was no such thing as coincidence in the world she had landed. Later she would've realized that the Female Titan had never really needed her eyesight to begin with, and she had only lulled them into a false sense of security to make them lower down their guards.

So she couldn't do anything to stop the Female Titan from chopping Eld's body in half with her teeth, or couldn't have thought that she could land such a perfect roundhouse kick on Gunther's body, shattering his bones instantly. They landed lifelessly on the grass below, staining green with red. The viciousness and familiarity of that kick stopped her in her tracks, floating midair with the help of her 3DMG unable to believe what had happened.

Petra and Oluo immediately stopped their second wave attacks, but meanwhile Oluo was able to put distance between them with grace, Petra hadn't always been good at regaining her balance, so she almost fell to the ground and started running away from the Female Titan with her 3DMG. Sakura had once saved her by body-flickering into the titan, allowing Petra to regain her balance. But right now she couldn't do that, since she was stuck with a wire and was too far away. But still, something inside her snapped and she immediately went after her best friend, mixing body-flicker with her 3DMG to get there faster.

"Petra! Get out of there! Regain your balance!" Oluo yelled.

She was so obsessed with getting to her friend on time that she missed when the Female Titan did a frontal flip and landed an axe kick on Petra, reducing her to a blood splatter on the grass.

"PETRA!" she yelled in anguish, which quickly turned to rage at the Female Titan. That was a taijutsu move. Not only was it almost impossible for any of her teammates to know how to do it, but the grace and precision reminded Sakura a bit of herself. The Female Titan's moves were a bit sloppy, but there was no question that she was good. Taijutsu... Eren had mentioned someone in his class––

No, that wasn't important. Revenge, _that _was important.

"Sakura!" Eren yelled, but she didn't mind him, or the fact that he was running back towards them.

They didn't have too much time. At this rate, not even her chakra was going to save her. They needed to create a new strategy, soon, if they wanted to survive this time. Oluo stared at her from behind the Female Titan, tears of despair rolling down his cheeks, and nodded once he recognized the signal. She was going to act as decoy, and he was going to land the killing blow.

The Female Titan did a backflip and landed much more gracefully on the floor. She must be aware Oluo was behind her, but Sakura would make sure she wouldn't be able to do something about it. She coated her blades with her chakra, careful to keep her control in check so that the blades wouldn't break. Killing intent was rolling off her in waves, the chakra so intense that even the Female Titan seemed a bit scared of her.

Sakura feinted going for the killing blow, sending one of her 3DMG hooks to a tree behind the Female Titan. Just like she had assumed, the blonde titan was about to land a simple frontal kick, but Sakura immediately let go off the hooks, used an obsessive amount of gas to give her height, and again used her gas to head straight to the Female Titan's chest. She readied her chakra-coated swords to stab her blades deep inside her chest, and the plan was to let gravity bring her to the floor, cutting the Female Titan's body in half.

Her war cry was cut off when her swords met resistance. The previously tissue-skin was now made out of a blue crystal so hard that not even her chakra-coated swords could only chip, and in fact they broke from the pressure of her chakra and the resistance of the blue crystal. One was sent flying to the side and the other backwards and impaled the right side of her abdomen, the blade cold and destructive. However, there were other pressing matters and she didn't even feel the hurt over the adrenaline.

Before she could even send her 3DMG to get back to safety, she screamed, "Oluo! NO! STOP!"

The Female Titan landed a flying kick on Oluo, and Sakura started falling to the ground, her body unresponsive.

They were gone.

Eld was gone.

Gunther was gone.

Petra was gone.

Oluo was gone.

She was alone.

The Female Titan caught her with her right hand, her shoulder muscles now healed. She had probably focused all of her regenerative powers not on her sight, but on that one arm. Sakura could hear Eren's screams coming closer, and while the Female Titan held her right in front of her face, Sakura saw the titan open one blue eye, satisfaction shining brightly. Normally such emotion would make her burn with anger, but she felt cold, so empty that she couldn't even muster a glare.

With practiced care, the Female Titan used her index and thumb to remove the blade from her stomach. Sakura gurgled and vomited blood, feeling faint and in extreme amounts of pain now that the adrenaline was leaving her body. Her stomach felt on fire but her mind was leaving her body. She didn't feel in control and couldn't even move her fingers. If the Female Titan didn't kill her now, the blood loss certainly would unless she could heal herself before she lost more blood.

The Female Titan then flicked Sakura's temple gently, but gentle for a titan was extremely violent for any human being. Luckily for Sakura, she was a kunoichi, because if not her brain could've ceased working right there. The flick opened a wound in her forehead, and blood started to flow down the right side of her face with intensity.

She was losing consciousness ––or life?–– but she could see the Female Titan putting her body inside of her mouth and she could hear Eren transforming into a titan and roaring in anger and anguish. Oh, Eren... She had promised herself she would protect him from everything, but it seemed she wasn't strong enough to keep that promise.

The Female Titan's mouth closed, leaving Sakura bleeding on her tongue and a strange mucus starting to cover her body.

She hadn't been powerful enough to keep any of her promises, but at least she was dying now and she wouldn't have to live with the shame anymore.

The area above her left breast started burning with power, and she soon lost consciousness to the sounds and movements of a titan fight.

* * *

><p><strong>Some of you thought it wasn't going to happen, others called it from the beginning. Those who read the manga know why I'm doing this, and those who don't read the manga should be warned we'll be going on that territory soon.<strong>

**Some have asked me throughout the course of this story if we would ever find out why Sakura appeared in SnK, if more ninjas were going to be involved, if Sakura is going to regain her memories, etc. Yes, this is not one of those stories where Sakura magically appears and we forget about the Naruto world. Annie Leonhart should answer the second question. And that last one is a mystery, but we most certainly will go in depth as to why Sakura lost her memories. I like to think there are two plots interweaving with each other, and you just see the SnK point of view. Besides, the "flashback" dreams Sakura sometimes have would be useless unless I had a point to make with them.**

**I know many of you will probably be disappointed to see Sakura fall short against the Female Titan, but I'd like to point out that Sakura is not exactly 100% ninja at the moment, considering she has a pitiful arsenal of jutsu under her belt. Chakra-enhanced blades like the ones Asuma has could've probably done the trick, but the blades Sakura has were not designed to be under the pressure of chakra, and they're quite brittle from all the stress. Furthermore, this Female Titan is more powerful than the canon Female Titan, if her minimal taijutsu and chakra-sensing abilities are of any evidence.**

**Little update on my personal life, college was brutal (but still got an okay GPA) and this next semester is going to be even more brutal. Luckily, I don't start class until very late January, so expect another update this month, before I have to go on another crazed, science-filled semester (I made the mistake of taking the three sciences this semester, so I have to take electricity and magnetism, general chemistry II, and physiology this semester plus their respective labs, and I have three other classes on top of these). So please know I'm not lying when I say I'm busy, and I have not given up on this story. In fact, this is the only story I'll be updating from now on, probably.**

**As always thanks to cecld16, Allykrau, Eternal Cat Moon, Shinkansen, Toreh, Guest, passanger, Green nook, Lady Icicle, TwinkleSwag, numpang lewat, Zolacookie, aoa1012, Zoorzh, idunknow, HowlingMidnightfang, xXHeavengirlXx, Wavywavy, XxBirdxOfxHermesxX, SakuraHerem, Curioslion, MerhppDerhpp, intergerlactic, rothfyae, DarqueDeath4444, Dimension4-death, Faircrown, Lady Light, .73, patrick the almighty observer, MiniRoonie, Fiore-Lily,YuukiChanLove, Chocogirl24, choco-chan, mun3litKnight, Hmmm, bookworm51485 , katy bae, Pirotessa, eirame, The Muse in the Silver Mirror, Amantedelacomida, TheCrazyAnimeFan, KasonSama, Sivren, AmeRaSora, urs-v, Q-asta, , XxBSCxX , BLacKxBUrN, Love Remedy and Vasuki for being wonderful reviewers and so supportive. Also, thank you to all who added this story to their alerts and favorites! I didn't think I would garner such a response when I first posted this, so I'm glad you enjoy it!**


	17. Burn

_"Rescue Sasuke?"_

_The older Uchiha nodded, no sign of happiness or relief present in his face at the prospect of saving his younger brother from the forked tongue of Orochimaru. "I'll be leading a mission soon, and I want you to be present in it."_

_"But why me?"_

_"You proved your worth in saving the Kazekage and besting Sasori of the Sand. I personally remember how strong he is from my time in Akatsuki. Besides, you're still part of Team Seven, and wouldn't you want to retrieve my brother?"_

**This is quite the interesting memory to conjure up in your unconscious state, my Vessel.**

_Sakura frowned and wiped her brow from the sweat and grime of their training session. Itachi was a wonderful sensei in helping her with water release, but he wasn't very forgiving and handed praises very often. In fact, Sakura usually thought she wasted his time by the amount of chiding she got. To hear that he respected her skills enough to ask her to be a part of the Sasuke rescue operation elated a small part of her._

_But most of her felt wary. She wasn't a heavy hitter like Naruto or Itachi or Kakashi, which was needed to bring Sasuke back. In fact, she was supposed to _not _be a heavy-hitter to adhere to the code Tsunade had spent months imparting in her. Her mission was to not kill, but to save. She was meant to survive, not risk her life. That was what was meant of a iryo-nin. To betray that code was to betray her teacher._

_"You have Naruto, who has become better at using Kyu–– Kurama, Kakashi, and Sai for sure. You know I can't actively go after him."_

**I laugh at myself, who actually thought making this kid a Vessel would have been a good idea.**

_Itachi gave a small smile, which was rarer than snow in the Land of Fire. "Of course, I'm not asking you to give up your code of conduct for me. I just know that rescuing Sasuke will result in no shortage of injuries on both sides, and I wouldn't want to lose anyone if I can. But that's not the only reason why I want you to come with me."_

_She pouted and fell on the grass floor, already expecting that even though their training ended, they still had unfinished business. Itachi followed her example a sat with an appropriate amount of distance from her, his black attire gaining no stains in contrast to her lighter one._

_"Of course there's always a deeper reason with you, Itachi-san."_

_"I've noticed you lack aggression."_

_"I __lack _aggression_?" she sputtered. "Have you never witnessed my spars against Shishou?" _

_He shook his head. "You misunderstand me, Sakura. I never said you didn't lack strength or the will to fight back, though perhaps you lacked that in the past so you see yourself today as an improvement, and rightfully so. But you still lack aggression, or a readiness to attack without prompting."_

_"I'm a medic. I'm not supposed to be aggressive, but rather stay on the sidelines and support."_

_"Yes, but you won't always be a medic. There will be times when you go on solo missions, and you have no one to save and protect but yourself. Your unwillingness to fight might be your downfall. Enemy shinobi do not care what you are, only that you're from Konoha. Sometimes you can't run away, and you must confront your enemies head-on, sometimes before they even realize you're present."_

**I am grateful to Itachi for giving you this amazing advice. Had you run away like your instincts told you, I would have a very different Vessel, or maybe no Vessel by now.**

_"And what do you propose?"_

_"I'm certainly not the person to teach you how to be aggressive, considering I abhor conflict and would like to consider myself a pacifist."_

_She narrowed her eyes and pointed an accusing finger at me. "Eh, why are you saying _I _should be aggressive but then _you _don't have to?"_

_He raised an eyebrow at her, clearly amused. "Are you saying you're as talented as Uchiha Itachi?"_

_Sakura quickly retracted her index finger and blushed slightly. "N-no."_

_"I don't mean to brag, but my skill precedes me, and therefore I'm intimidating enough that I don't need to be aggressive to prove a challenge towards others. Tsunade-sama also has a history that makes her worthy of fear. Haruno Sakura, however, doesn't, and you need to compensate until enough people fear your name._

_"But where was I... Ah, yes, I cannot teach you how to be aggressive, but I've heard throughout my travels of a group that can."_

_"A group?"_

_"Tell me, has Tsunade-sama talked to you about Summoning Jutsu."_

_"I already have a contract with Katsuyu-sama, yes."_

_"Then you understand what must be done to gain such a contract, then?"_

_"Live with them and gain their trust."_

_Itachi nodded. "Should we be successful with Sasuke, I would like to entrust your training to a group of wolves close sources told me about. Unfortunately, since I don't have the contract I can't make the process easy to you, so you must start from zero. Fortunately, they're not known to be allied with one particular village, so at least it's not impossible."_

_"You want me to live with wolves," she said, which was meant to sound more like a question, but the surprise and incredulity seeped heavily into her voice._

_"Yes. Have you ever heard about wolves' territoriality and aggression? Plus they are social and work in packs or alone, so it goes perfectly with what I'm trying to tell you."_

_"I swear, Itachi-san, all of this better pay off."_

_He hummed, stood up, and extended a hand towards her, which she gratefully took. She dusted her clothes and started walking to the exit of the training fields next to her mentor._

_"I forgot to ask, how is your seal training going?"_

_She instinctively put a hand on the spot above her heart, the place she had chosen her Strength of a Hundred Seal to go. "I still have eight more years before I have stored enough chakra to match Tsunade-sama's, but I've mastered it enough that I can store chakra in my sleep, without any conscious thought. Why?"_

_He shook his head. "No, nothing. I was just thinking how terrifying you will be once that seal awakens."_

* * *

><p><strong>And indeed, awake the seal is. Can you feel your cells regenerating, Haruno Sakura, filling the hole in your abdomen, the wound in your forehead? It is this seal that convinced me to finally make you my Vessel, for you cannot die, even if you wanted to. Tsunade is old and unimpressionable, but you... You gave yourself to me so easily. My genjutsu and seal had absolutely no resistance, not that any resistance you could've given would be <strong>**a match to my Sharingan.**

**In me there is death... But in you I see rebirth. A glorious, unstoppable reformation that will end up destroying us and saving us all.**

**It seems you are about to wake up. Can you feel the genjutsu and seal erasing your dream already? I wish I could actually see what you are seeing in your world, but I can tell by the state of your mind that you are in shock. Good, create more memories, feel more intensity, become a full-fledged Vessel.**

**Achieve my dream.**

* * *

><p>Roars... Movement... Sliding...<p>

"She's..."

Her body flung and carried in the air.

"...alive... but... blood"

"You... carry... dirty."

Trees... Shadows... People...

* * *

><p>When Sakura gained consciousness and felt the sunlight on her eyelids and body, she only cursed herself for forgetting to feed Haruto. He could be so rowdy at times, and the chances of rowdiness increased if she missed his breakfast by more than thirty minutes.<p>

Besides that, she felt very... airy. It took only a couple of seconds to realize this airiness stemmed from very baggy clothes. Soon after that, she realized there was another chakra presence in her room. Truly foolish of her to let thoughts like Haruto and the state of her body dominate her mind over the fact there was an intruder in her room. What a poor excuse of a ninja she had become. Then again, the chakra presence wasn't threatening and it was actually familiar, so maybe that was why she hadn't felt in danger.

She opened her eyes and saw much to her surprise that she wasn't in her room, but rather one of the infirmary rooms. She had only been in this section of the Survey Corps before and that was when she had "broken" her arm in practice with the old Levi Squad, with Liesel and Jung and Eld. Liesel had been a bit of a bitch back then, but she was only dealing with her grief at losing her brother. In hindsight, she had been unfair to her, but there was nothing she could do now to apologize or make it up to her.

Sakura sat up and noticed that the person sitting on the chair, slumbering with her head back, was none other than Amina. It had truly been a while since she had last seen Amina, at least a month since Squad Levi had taken refuge in the old headquarters to protect Eren and provide damage control. True, Amina had visited them once, but it was rather brief and she was on business from Hange. Not much time for girl talk back then.

Sakura was clothed in a wide beige shirt, and she could feel the constricting bandages around her torso and around her forehead. Had she been in an accident?

Amina's eyes fluttered open, and she blinked a couple of times from the sunlight streaming right into her face. Her head bobbed back to its original position only to meet Sakura's questioning green eyes, and she started weeping, the intensity shaking her body with such force that her ribs hurt. Amina launched herself at Sakura, laying her head in her bosom, and sobbed.

And as much as Sakura wanted to weep with her, because she couldn't just ignore everything anymore, she found she couldn't. There was no sadness in her heart, like when Helsa died in her arms. There was no fiery anger, like when she found Mikoto and Erik dead and Mikasa missing. No desperation, like when Karla died and Wall Sina fell. No guilt, like when Jung and Liesel sacrificed themselves to save her.

She felt empty, and very cold.

"You..." Amina sobbed. "Everyone..."

"I'm alive."

Amina nodded, but did not stop crying. "But... P-Petra..."

An extra beat. "Yeah."

Amina removed her head from Sakura's chest and observed her face intently. What did she see, Sakura wondered. A friend? Murderer? Liar? Betrayer? A godsend? That she was alive must be a surprise. Even Sakura herself was surprised to wake up. The wounds she had received, though not fatal to a medical ninja, were serious enough that without immediate treatment she would've surely bled out.

"Yet you live," Amina whispered. She detached herself from Sakura and wiped her eyes. "You always live," she continued, just as quietly. Even though the words sounded accusing, she said them so flatly Sakura didn't feel personally attacked. "Even against impossible odds, you always survive."

"Is that a problem?"

Amina's eyes hardened, and she got up from the bed, putting some distance between them. Her eyes, however, were fire and water. "You're my best friend, Sakura. If you had died a bigger part of me would have died with you." Amina stared down at the floor, clenching and unclenching her fists. "I always thought you were just lucky, but too many instances of good luck and you start to realize that people just know something you don't. Your power to sense titans... You know why you have it, right?"

"Yes."

"And you won't tell me the source." Seeing that Sakura wasn't going to respond, she sighed. "The only time you have ever judged me was when I surrendered myself to death, back before we signed up for the Survey Corps. I'll extend the same sentiment towards you: don't surrender to death, and I won't question your origins."

"You're not going to tell anyone?"

Amina snarled, and even though her face was tear-stricken face, she looked quite intimidating. "You think that after everything I lost, I would want to lose you too?"

Sakura hummed in approval. She could trust her secret with Amina, her only remaining friend, because not only did Amina love Sakura, but she was trustworthy and wouldn't want to lose her last remaining good friend by turning her in. However, there was also the chance that Amina would blame her for not saving Petra or Oluo, and end up telling their superiors.

But she was done caring. She had kept her secret for so long so that she would be able to better protect her friends and wards, but now that most of her friends were dead and her wards out of her reach, what was the point?

"I am a ninja."

Amina cocked her head to the side. "A what?"

Sakura stood up and body-flickered behind Amina. "A ninja."

Amina yelped in fright and instinctively tried to punch Sakura, but she easily stopped her fist before it landed. "Wha-What? What is that? What are you?"

Sakura frowned. "I've just said it twice. I'm a ninja."

She glared at Sakura. "I know _that, _genius. I don't know what being a ninja entails. That's why I keep asking."

"From what I remember, most of us are assassins and fighters. We can wield chakra. It's what allows us to do what I just did."

She sighed and sat down on the bed Sakura had previously occupied. She looked weary, and started massaging her temple. "So you kill people?"

She shook her head. "No, I'm still the soldier you know about. That is the source of my powers, though. That's why I can sense titans, because their chakra is warped. I can sense your chakra, too. Every person's chakra is really similar to each other people's, but once you spend enough time with someone, these differences become much clearer."

"What else can you do, besides scaring me to death?"

"I have super-strength... I wish I could show you but I can break the land if I wanted to."

"Is that it?"

"I... I can... I can heal people."

Amina was quiet, her face mulling over the implications of what she just said. Her ability to heal was in her opinion her greatest downfall. She was a bystander to so many tragedies when she had the power to do something about it. Amina was probably thinking about that, about all the people she could've saved had she come forth earlier.

"Can you bring people back from the death?"

"No, I think that is impossible, actually."

Amina stood up and stared at Sakura, determination brimming in her eyes. "I want to hate you, but I can't. I know why you've kept it a secret the same way I kept my heritage a secret. Our identities are dangerous, but also influential. My family has offered to entirely fund the Survey Corps's operations for the next three decades and give them more noble support if I chose to come back to them, but I keep refusing, because I don't want to leave, even if it means the Survey Corps is much poorer and weaker because of it.

"I have always thought you were more like Petra, selfless and innocent, but you are more like me. We rather see the world burn than sacrifice our freedom for humanity."

"No, Amina, you're wrong. If we wanted to see the world burn, we would be setting it on fire. But we're here, in the Survey Corps, doing our best to save humanity. I don't want to be defined as a ninja as much as you don't want to be defined as the heir to the Burgeis. There is only so much we can give to the world before we lose ourselves."

"You've kept my heritage a secret from our comrades, so I will do the same. But my previous threat remains: don't surrender to death."

No, dying would be much too easy. People like her deserved to live out their mistakes and suffer every second of them, until she was withered and weak from the pain.

Only until she made sure her precious people had a decent shot at a good future would she allow herself to rest forever.

* * *

><p>After Amina left, Sakura was bombarded with five doctors, forcing her to lay on the bed again, all of them asking questions about how she was feeling, and no one ever mentioned the wounds she had sustained, only the bloody uniform she came back with.<p>

Why was she alive? The last thing she remembered before passing out was a burning sensation, probably because she had been stabbed. The burning sensation... it did not come from her stomach, though. It came from her chest, she was sure of that. The only interesting thing on her chest was the purple rhombus of power that had appeared there a couple of years ago.

Had it saved her? If so, how?

One of the male doctors stopped observing her and turned back. "Miss Ackerman is not ready to receive friends at the moment."

"I'm not a friend."

Even though they were blocking her view of the door, Sakura knew who was there. She terribly missed her, but at the same time was wary of what could happen if they decided to talk. The last time they talked they had gotten into a rather nasty fight, and she felt nothing had been resolved since.

The five doctors stared at her questioningly. Sakura replied, "She's my sister. I want to talk to her."

"Your health––" the blond doctor started.

"We cannot deny that she is in perfect health," the sole female doctor remarked. "She could leave right now if she wanted to."

The darker skinned doctor hummed in agreement. "We should focus on checking up on the other wounded soldiers. Let's leave these soldiers alone."

They shuffled out, putting a safe distance between themselves and Mikasa, who had her usual blank face, and left, making sure to close the door. As soon as the strangers left, Mikasa sat in the chair Amina had previously occupied, and a heavy silence ensued, even though there was too much to be said. Sakura, for once, was at a loss on how to start a conversation with her adoptive sister. If she started with a joke, Mikasa might get angry that she just brushed off her worry or anger. If she started somberly, Mikasa might get more depressed, or angry.

"_I did not know you could bleed," _Mikasa started in Japanese, her head down to avoid any eye contact.

"_All humans bleed."_

_"But you're strong, the strongest person I had ever met. And I thought there was no obstacle you couldn't face, no enemy you couldn't kill. Many times I thought you were the personification of Warrior Maria, sent to protect us, and the Wallists were correct._

_"And then that midget Captain gave me your body to carry, and I realized I had never seen something so broken in my life before. And in that moment, I realized the mistake I made, in our talk after the trial. For that, I'm sorry." _

Sakura got up from the bed and kneeled in front of Mikasa. Her fists were clenched, her eyes watery, and Sakura added another reason why she couldn't die yet. _"I... I understand why you said the things you said, and I'm also sorry for giving you a false image. You're one of the few I can be truly honest with, and I chose to deceive you. I'm not all-powerful, Mikasa. Maybe I was, back when we lived with Erik and Mikoto, but because the enemies weren't that dangerous. Now, the enemies are brutal."_

Mikasa nodded and bit her lip, trying her hardest not to cry. She never thought she would end up saving her bigger sister, and she had never wanted to save her, either. But against the Female Titan, everybody needed saving. "_Speaking of enemies... Could you go over the Female Titan with me? I have suspicions that I want you to clear up."_

Sakura felt herself growing hotter at the mention of the Female Titan. Nothing elicited such a violent response, not even the death of her squad. She was going to kill the female titan-shifter, no doubt about that. She wouldn't rest until she had her revenge. She wouldn't allow herself to cry until she avenged her friends.

She stood up and moved as far away from Mikasa as she could, facing the farthest wall. She didn't want her to see Sakura like this. "_What about her?" _she growled.

"_Was there something weird about her?"_

_"Besides the fact that she knew certain ninja moves, no. Oh, and she could track my team with chakra."_

Mikasa's eyes widened. _"The titan-shifter is a ninja?"_

Sakura shook her head. "_No, her chakra presence wasn't like mine. I was probably the beacon that led her to my team, now that I think about it. She probably can't detect the minute differences in chakra presences, but she must've known I was a ninja, and she must've known I was going to be with Eren."_

_"I think I have an idea of who she is. I think she is––"_

_"Annie Leonhard," _Sakura finished for her.

"_How did you know?"_

_"Eren mentioned knowing someone who knew certain ninja moves so well that she could teach them. Does she have blonde hair and blue eyes?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Then there is no doubt about it. The interesting thing is that she is in the Military Police. How did she know that Eren would be on this expedition? Or that Eren would be with me? Or that Eren would be in the forest? This is information very few in the Survey Corps have access to, which means that we also have at least another traitor in our midst."_

_"Speaking of traitors..."_

Sakura turned around, her interest piqued. "_What?"_

_"I've been speaking in Japanese this whole time because I fear there is someone hearing us."_

_"There's nobody. I would've sensed a presence outside this room. But why do you think someone might want to spy on us?"_

She shook her head. "_Not just anybody. The midget Captain has been very suspicious since we came back to the old headquarters yesterday. He knows that you're hiding something from him, and wants to find out what it is. It didn't help that your uniform was drenched in blood, with a hole in your abdomen, but there was no wound to be found."_

_"So he's onto my secret. A lot of people seem to be onto my secret."_

_"Why did Annie want you?"_

_"I'm not sure. I think it's because I'm a ninja, but it still brings more questions than answers. At this point, I just want her death. She is mine, Mikasa. I know you're angry with her because tried to take Eren, but she killed my closest friends, and for that her blood will run through my fingers."_

Mikasa frowned and stood up. In her she saw the disapproval Sakura once had for Eren and his lust for vengeance. "_After my parents were murdered, you told me love was a better motivation than hate and revenge, and I decided to take the love I had for Eren and you to protect you against all costs instead of letting hatred consume me. What happened to that Sakura?"_

That was the last lesson Helsa had imparted on Sakura before she left this rather cruel world, but almost every major event seemed to challenge that statement. It was so hard to hold onto love in this world. What happened when every person she loved in this world died, and she was left with no one to fight for?

"_Helsa__, Mikoto, Erik, Kalura, Grisha... Oluo... Petra... Add you, Eren, Armin, and Amina and that is the list of all the people I love. You will find a majority of the list are dead. My mind understands the wisdom of your words, Mikasa, it really does, but my heart is tired... So very tired."_

Mikasa clenched her teeth and cried, though Sakura was unsure as to why. She launched herself at Sakura and sobbed silently in her chest, and the only thing Sakura could do was to awkwardly hold her taller sister and remain silent, even though her mind was brimming with questions.

"_Eren is alive, right?"_

_"Yeah... We rescued him too."_

She hadn't realized she had stopped breathing until Mikasa confirmed her precious adoptive brother was fine. But that still didn't explain why Mikasa was crying so much. The last time she had was when their parents had died. Yet Sakura knew better than to question this moment. Mikasa closely matched Sakura's emotional strength, and to see her lay her emotions bare was a beautiful moment few were privy too.

"Can I stay the night here?"

"Night?"

"Yes, it's close to ten."

Ah, the lack of windows had fooled her. She must've slept for a very long time, which was understandable considering the extensive regeneration her body had undergone.

"Of course, Mikasa. Are you going to put on your nightgown?"

She shook her head and slowly let Sakura go. Even though her eyes were red, they were still strong. "I don't mind sleeping in my uniform."

"Beneath this infirmary gown I am naked."

"I don't care."

Sakura gave a small smile and laid down in the bed, patting a spot next to hers. "Then come here, and let me tell you the story about the man who sought his love in the depths of the world."

She had barely finished relaying the story about Adalie and Eifah, one that had first come to her through Sebastian's mouth, when Mikasa fell into deep slumber, snoring quietly in her chest. Sakura quietly played with her black hair, as dark as night, and wondered if somewhere she had a sibling with hair as pink as cherry blossoms.

If her pink-haired sibling was behind her squad's death, then she would also aim her revenge at her own flesh and blood.

* * *

><p>The cheer in the mess hall was nonexistent, and his black tea tasted bitterer than usual. The first thing Erwin and he had done was to get a death count of the expedition, and the number had been forty-five. Out of one hundred and nine soldiers that set out on this expedition, only sixty-four had returned. They had predicted it was going to be bad, but not <em>this <em>bad.

Included in those forty-five was the majority of his squad, people he had spent two years training and bonding with. To say he was angry was an understatement, but the five squad leaders had bigger fish to fry, the biggest one being that idiotic Female Titan who was hiding inside Wall Sina, according to the newcomer brats.

Oh, and there also was Eren's execution in the horizon if they didn't step their game up. If Eren died, the Survey Corps died with him, and he didn't want to think about what would happen afterwards.

"Captain Levi!" Moblit saluted him, and Levi had to hold in a sigh; damn Erwin and his impatient ass. "Commander Erwin requests your presence in his office."

Levi sipped on his hot tea, because by the time he came back it would be as cold as Erwin's heart and damn him for not letting him enjoy a small break. "Thank you, Moblit, I'll be on my way."

He got up from the bench and made his way through the cluster-fuck that was the old Survey Corps's headquarters. He understood why they had to retreat her for the next week, so that Military Police wouldn't find them until they were ready, but he really hated this damn castle. It was old, dirty, had little to no windows, and he felt more suffocated than he had in his days underground.

Levi knocked on Erwin's door and almost immediately Erwin told him to come in. Levi skipped the saluting formalities, because even though he was a stickler for rules, he and Erwin and no need for shows of authority. Levi walked across the room to the commander's office

The blond commander's face was taut and serious, reflecting their current position. "How's your leg?"

"I've had worse injuries, but I don't think I'll be ready for the battle."

"Then rest. We can't afford to have you get a worse injury from that battle and I was thinking of putting Sakura in your spot."

Not many things surprised him nowadays, but this did. "Why?"

"The report from the doctors came today. She sustained absolutely no injuries from her encounter with the Female Titan. You have trained her well, Levi."

Something was not making sense, but he could only remain quiet. He had to find out what Sakura was hiding before he told Erwin. The commander had too much on his head already and didn't need his suspicions on top of it. "Even with her bloody clothes."

"They concluded it came from the blood of her fallen comrades and the Female Titan's juices. She did spend more time in there than Eren, after all."

He had wanted to wait before confronting Sakura, but after this report he simply couldn't. Their deaths were too fresh, and even though he was sure she didn't kill his squad, it would destroy him if she had a hand in their downfall.

"Question her. I share your same suspicions, Levi, you don't need to hide them from me just because I am stressed."

"Something is not adding up from the story. Her body had her blood, from that I am sure, and it was so much blood I thought she was dead. The reason why Annie wanted her... That was expected but the injury makes me think––"

"That she's a titan-shifter, yes. It would make sense why Annie Leonhard was targeting two titan-shifters and why Sakura was able to regenerate her wounds so quickly. That still doesn't explain her ability to sense titans, or why she has helped us so thoroughly for so long. We cannot deny that she had a strong attachment to her teammates and to the orphans from Shiganshina. I don't think Sakura is an enemy, but there is something very big that she is keeping from us."

"Are you sure you still want her in the mission knowing she may be lying?"

"Yes. Our foremost priority is the capture of Annie Leonhard, and having Sakura in there will increase our success rate."

"I need to tell her what her duties are in the next mission, anyway."

"Very well, you're dismissed."

Levi left the room without so much as a word, and left to find Sakura, which wouldn't be too hard in this small castle. He had no doubt in his gut that Sakura didn't want to harm them, but his gut also told him Sakura was dangerous. This last month had brought to light too many inconsistencies in who she was. He sincerely hoped she was a titan-shifter, because if she wasn't then he would lose his mind.

Luck would have it that he would run into Mikasa Ackerman in the hallway. The girl's disdain for him was palpable, no doubt because of the beating he gave Eren a month ago. Still, she had to learn how to grow the fuck up before someone ––ahem, _him_–– died because of her mistakes ––ahem, _temper_.

He stood in front of her, blocking her view. "I need to speak with your sister."

"And she doesn't want to speak with you."

"Where is your sister?" he asked in a commanding tone, a tone a soldier like her couldn't ignore.

Mikasa glared at him, her eyes like a snake. "She's in the stable. I don't know if you have any emotions in that shell of yours, but _please _leave her alone."

Levi grunted and walked past her; that was the way to the stable and he didn't give a shit what a brat like her thought. Sakura wasn't a delicate flower to be protected or nurtured. She was made to withstand the harshness of life and become stronger.

She was like him, and he understood her better than Mikasa Ackerman.

A soldier was stationed outside the stable, looking a bit nervous.

"Is everything okay, soldier?"

"Uh, Sakura is inside and asked me to leave her alone. But I need to clean the stable and... well, I just don't know what to do. sir."

At least she was still a bitch. "I release you from today's duty, soldier. Make sure nobody comes inside, though."

He saluted, but Levi was already inside by the time the he accepted his orders.

His pink-haired second-in-command was in front of her horse, Haruto, just as he had expected. She was just staring at him, her eyes unseeing, and the horse was growing warier and more impatient knowing his master wasn't doing anything to feed him or pet him.

"Are you just going to stare at him and wait for his ass to fall out?"

Sakura continued staring at Haruto and placed a hand on his snout. "He needs to learn how to be patient."

"It's a bit late for that."

"As long as you're alive, it's never too late."

Yes, for the dead cannot change or do anything. No matter how many times he apologized to Isabel and Farlan, he didn't feel any better. There were no words of comfort from the dead, no forgiveness, only assumptions. He assumed they would forgive him, because that's his picture of them, but would they really forgive that he chose bloodlust over their safety?

"There is no use in wasting your life away over the dead. You should start letting them go."

She still did not turn to acknowledge him, and continued petting Haruto, who was now snorting in content. "Let go of the dead? Yeah, I know how to do that. But letting go is one of the weird things in life that gets harder the more you do it."

"And you become stronger because of it."

Sakura stopped petting her beloved horse and turned towards him. "And when everyone is dead, what's the strength for?" Usually, whenever they stared down at each other, he always saw defiance in her eyes, a unstoppable fire that he thought couldn't burn out. She was strong, and proud of her strength, and wouldn't allow anyone to dominate her; not titans, not grief, certainly not Levi himself.

But her eyes were dead. There was no grief, no anger, no denial, no acceptance. She was dead. When his two best friends had died, he had been blinded by rage and fury and guilt, but she was a empty husk. She breathed, yes, but this Sakura compared to the radiant one he has fought with was just a fluke, a poor excuse of a person.

And he hated it.

He hated her.

Levi launched himself at her and grabbed her by the throat, then slammed her against the wooden wall. The horses whinnied in fear, no doubt surprised by the display of violence. Though she was heavy, he was still stronger than her and managed to lift her. "What use are you to me as weak? I lie for you, you lie to me, and you start this bullshit?"

She should be beyond livid at him, but her green eyes were still cold. "I lie to you?"

He clenched his grip a bit harder, and now he was sure she would be bruised. "Cut the act. Your wounds regenerate at amazing speeds, the Female Bitch wants you, you can detect titans... What is this starting to sound like?"

"You think I'm a titan-shifter."

"That's where the evidence is pointing at, and I'm not stupid enough to blind myself to the truth."

"Release me."

He blinked, slightly weakening his hold. "What?"

"I said, 'Release me.' You're lucky I haven't beat your ass because of this."

A spark, but no fire yet.

He let her go, more willingly than unwillingly, and stepped back to give her some space.

She massaged her bruising neck, speaking in some foreign language as she did. "I'm not a titan-shifter, and I can't prove it to you but you have to trust my word."

"Why should I?"

"Because you have no choice. If I tell you the truth, it will bring more questions than answers. In return of your trust, I promise that I'll tell you everything after we reach Eren's basement, until our primary mission is over."

"That's unfair. How do I know that your secret won't place the Survey Corps in danger? How do I know people won't die in the name of your secret?"

She visibly winced, and something told him the answer wasn't going to be pretty. "People have already died protecting me. I can't guarantee the last one. I can guarantee our success in killing the Female Titan."

"The mission is to _capture _the titan-shifter, not to kill her. She has valuable information that we need to extract."

Sakura glared at him, and the fire was back. But this was not determination, this was a burning lust for vengeance. There was no desire to protect, only destroy. His eyes probably looked like that when he saw Farlan and Isabel's dead bodies, and the carnage that ensued was the most violent display of 3DMG usage he had ever witnessed.

She was only alive for revenge, a corruption of her ideals, and the easiest way to put her back on a path similar to the one she followed was to let her kill Annie Leonhard.

Unfortunately for her, there was no way in hell he would allow that.

"She killed our teammates, our close friends, and you want to _capture _her? Did you not care about your teammates? Do you not want revenge?"

He had never realized how nasty she could be, how low she could go to achieve what she wanted, and that was despicable. But she was hurting, deeply, and he understood that. He had done that, used revenge as a way to keep the mind entertained before the grief kicked in, but there was no way to avoid that pain. If she also thought she could alleviate the further pain with the satisfaction of Annie's death, she was mistaken.

He could aggravate her further, push her past her limit, but what would he gain from that? Another broken teammate, one less person he could trust in.

Levi wanted to heal her, the desire was so intense it surprised him, but that was impossible. Instead he had to help her heal.

"The needs of humanity are greater than your need for vengeance. They enlisted to save humanity. They wouldn't want you to seek revenge if it meant putting humanity a step back."

Sakura grit her teeth, her mouth drawn in a violent snarl and her nose scrunched up in anger. "It's so easy for you to say. What have you lost, Captain... How _much _have you lost? Someone who hasn't lost––"

He felt his cheeks getting hotter, but he wouldn't let himself be riled up by her. "I have lost more than you know, Sakura. I have been deprived from more than you know, and look what a shit I am. Don't make those comments without actually knowing anything about me."

Her facial features slightly relaxed, but her eyes still held that wrath, that precious wrath that kept her sane. "Then you understand what I am going through."

"Yes." But instead of killing Erwin, the fixation of his revenge, Levi had decided to follow him. There was no way Sakura would follow Annie, but maybe if she made Annie feel the pain she felt... Levi hadn't expected to reach a compromise, but this was the best solution. "I won't allow you to kill her, but I'll allow you to fight her, and, if you're up for it, I'll allow you to torture her for information."

This piqued her interest. "Torture?"

"I'm sure she won't willingly give up information. But the only way to torture her is to capture her. And you can torture her whichever way you want, because titan-shifters can regenerate entire limbs if they want."

Sakura was deep in thought, no doubt going over the information he had just told her. He considered himself a monster, but to start considering Sakura the same kind as his was not only perturbing, but a welcome thought. Erwin became a monster to save humanity, Hange to find more about titans, but he became one to survive, a selfish goal. Sakura, though not one completely, was entertaining the idea just to fulfill her revenge, perhaps an even more selfish goal.

"That sounds agreeable."

"Good. I'm injured right now, so you'll take over my responsibilities."

The fire died, and she raised an eyebrow. "The great Captain, injured?"

"You can blame your sister for that one. She's as much of a hothead as you are."

"What did she do?"

"She wanted to go after the Female Titan alone and almost got herself killed, but I pushed her out of the way."

"You saved Mikasa?" For once, Sakura was fearful rather than angry. Mikasa must've left out that particular detail from their rescue mission. Not that he blamed her, knowing how protective Sakura was. The fear turned into guilt. "Thank you, Captain. I... I didn't know."

Levi's eyes narrowed and he huffed. "Don't thank me. I would've done the same for any of my soldiers." Yes, he would've saved anyone that had been in that position, but Mikasa Ackerman was important, not only as an asset but also her connection to another asset.

Sakura gave a small smile. "At any rate, I owe you. I shall do everything you command, Captain."

He scrunched his nose. "Now _that's _disgusting. Just keep being yourself, Ackerman." Her face became confused, and Levi internally sighed. "What is it?"

She shook her head and started walking towards the stable's exit. "No, nothing to worry about, Captain. Shall we leave?"

"Tch, I can only handle the smell of shit for so long."

* * *

><p>A black-haired man sighed when he woke up from his dream. Only it wasn't <em>his <em>dream, and it wasn't fictional. The events he dreamed had taken place a couple of years ago to a woman named Haruno Sakura. His connection to Sakura had taken him by surprise, but it wasn't completely unwelcome. It was good to find out more about his Vessel, the person he had invested his hopes and aspirations on, and the woman his organization worshipped as a goddess promising a new, better world.

The only downside of this was the intense feelings he sometimes got, no doubt but an inkling of what she felt. Time flowed differently between his world and the world he had sent her to, but the emotions traveled nonetheless, since their connection transcended both time and space. Though it was annoying, in a way he thought it fair to feel but a fraction of what she felt, whether it be the intense pain or the happiness that came from her journey.

The room was extremely dark, with the only source of light having been extinguished in the night. The Land of Spring had changed to the Land of Snow yet again, the natural occurrence of the seasons, but this blizzard they were experiencing was particularly chilling. It's a good thing the Land of Snow had advanced technology to warm his castle, or else his people would be very upset with him.

He felt the chakra presence before the person could even knock. "Come in," he commanded after he put on his mask.

The door opened slowly, and in came a simple blue dog mask. She bowed to him lowly, and started getting papers out of the folder she carried. "I've come with the reports from the three major missions, Red Wolf."

"Proceed, Blue Dog."

"Akatsuki has taken over the Land of This, and has been annexed to the Land of That. Their bases are growing, but an inside source tells me their numbers aren't; nobody has replaced you or Uchiha Itachi."

"That won't deter Pein from launching an attack on Konoha to find Uzumaki Naruto," Red Wolf murmured.

"Which brings me to my second report. Another source tells us that the Konoha ninja are launching another expedition to the world you sent Haruno Sakura-sama to. Should we send our own ninja to stop them?"

"Do you know now who is going on the expedition?"

She shook her head. "No, not even my sources can tell me that. It is very classified information."

Red Wolf waved a hand. "It doesn't matter how many expeditions they go on; they will probably never find her."

"Because their Seishirou isn't as complete as yours?"

"Indeed. Without the left eye, Kakashi cannot do much. That and their bodies aren't meant to withstand space-time travel for long periods of time without killing their bodies. Now, you had a third report?"

Blue Dog switched papers yet again. "Our numbers keep growing, Red Wolf, even shinobi numbers. The last census of the organization brought a number of around three hundred, counting the inside sources. We will need a new place to house more recruits, perhaps a warmer place to attract more people."

"It is good so many people believe in our dream, Blue Dog. You will all build the foundations for the new world."

Blue Dog was quiet, considering she was always very vocal about her approval of his plan.

"What is it?"

"I have started to notice the way you talk about your plan, sir, and you always make it sound as if you're not a part of the aftermath."

"Because I'm not. Both the Vessel and the Harbinger will be consumed as a price to destroy this one and create a new one. This is why I made this an organization, a belief. You all will carry my legacy and make adjustments as you see fit."

"But sir... You're our leader. What will we do without our leader?"

His eye narrowed, but she wouldn't be able to see that. "I wear a mask just like you do, Blue Dog. I will create this world for you, but I shall not be a part of it. It's Haruno Sakura's and my gift to you for all the sins chakra-wielders have made towards humanity for so many decades."

"You don't have to punish yourself, especially after everything you've done for us. You can live in the new world, Red Wolf."

"It's not punishment, Blue Dog. It's redemption."

* * *

><p><strong>I am so very sorry for the rather large break I took. My freshman year is done, and I'll enjoy summer break by dishing out updates every once in a while, plus getting back in the mood for my other stories. I know many worry that I will not finish this story, and the worry is well-placed given the nature of fan fiction, but I have come too far with this baby to just leave it unfinished. <strong>

**I actually finished this chapter a week ago, but there was something about this chapter that didn't sit well with me, particularly the Amina bit, until I remembered her nature and my worries were mostly assuaged. I know most of you want a Sakura that wants revenge, and I'm for that too, but that Sakura is darker. And she will be dark (and hateful, as you've noticed) until she deals with certain demons.**

**Also, I would like to express my gratitude to ****catxan****gel, BLacKxBUrN, MerhppDerhpp, ANIMAGIRL, XxBSCxX, Chienna, Exeva, Allykrau, miskamimi, Lady Icicle, Gijeena, DinoPower, TheCrazyAnimeFan01, Usagi Kumori, CrystalHeart27, Basia Orci, Shinkansen, LeHustler, Love Remedy, ustler, Sky65, xbLoOmZx, passanger, Amantedelacomida, Zoorzh, Sivren, dark-wolf-howl, Guest, patrick the almighty observer, numpang lewat, Lunardragon33, The Arsenal, Shuri Kuran, kwizten, katsekala, Myboobseclipsethesun, Phoenix177117, SakuraHerem, N1ght-13 , naremon, Green nook, Mayflowerz 411, zombiekins5948, Lullaby Cherry, 001133, YuukiChanLove, HawaiianSunsets, Lord-of-Change, the Green Platypus, XxBirdxOfxHermesxX, Yokaigurl,Desperate Anon, the Shutterbug , kalientris,Guest, Liffae, EdenMae , tdychko , Flaming Belladonna, Izumikii, FUN 2 KNOW, Queen Oreo Awesomeness, Pirotessa, Insert Valid Author Name , Xoxosincerelyabby, hotredsakura1315 , EmiliaKyuchi, Rainlyn , Darkzuryan, BlowBlowWinterWind, TheQueen'sknight, zombiekins5948, ii-N3koChan, Naruto4Evar, jaz7, TigerWolf93, Sook03, Loser Ghoul, silverwolfigther00 ,Finn Girl Cosplay Girl, erynz, ladyparty123, EnkoScotch, and XBrightCitiesx. Where would I be without your wonderful support. **

**I know some of you are concerned with how canon the story has been flowing, but I'll have to ask you to trust me on this one. Fan fiction is not a book, but individual chapters that eventually become a book. This means readers cannot get the bigger picture until the author uploads the final chapter and everything starts coming into place. I already have a story I have planned for more than a year, and that story requires certain characters to be in certain positions or certain places that require certain canon events to occur for them to make sense. I said I was going to write an AU, and I will write an AU, don't worry.**

**As always, comments, criticisms, and concerns are very appreciated.**


	18. Beyond the Wall

Three days had passed since the expedition, and the pile of papers did not seem to get any smaller. Erwin had delegated to Levi the tasks of filling out the death reports, sending condolences letters to the families of the deceased, filling out fund requests, and creating budget reports for the next two expeditions, if they even got them to begin with. Normally, most of these tasks were handled by Erwin, but he was too busy creating main plans and contingency plans for their attack in Stohess.

It had not been easy, but they had successfully located Annie Leonhart, first year Military Police cadet. Erwin had tactfully arranged the meeting to determine Eren's fate in Stohess. The plan was to use Eren's trial as a sort of bait for Annie, hoping she still felt camaraderie for Eren and sympathized with his plight, eventually helping him escape through a series of tunnels. Once in there, titan-shifting would become harder underground, and her capture would be almost assured. They had also sent most of the 104th recruits to a secret location near Wall Rose so that Annie would be cut off from her inside sources.

Should that plan fail, they would use updated measures from the 57th Expedition to capture Annie in Stohess, but the predicted civilian casualties went from as low as a thousand to as high as seventy percent of the population of Stohess. Levi sincerely hoped that Annie was captured at this stage, because if not the Survey Corps funding would suffer a dire hit, and Eren's fate would almost certainly be death unless they're gifted with another chance to show the world the dangers they were facing.

Simply put, failure to capture Annie Leonhart was not an option.

He took another paper from the pile and allowed his hand to follow the mechanical movement of signing the bottom of the sheet. He was about to put the quill back in the inkwell when he noticed the addressees of the letter. _Dear Thomas and Gretchen Bozado... _His hand froze over the paper, allowing botches of ink to fall on the paper. This was a generic letter, the template used for every single KIA of the Survey Corps. The thought that his team was going to receive the same bad news and old condolences everyone got made his stomach churn. Favoritism was prohibited in the military, but his team was _dead_. They had died trying to protect what they thought was Humanity's Hope.

He put the quill back in the inkwell and stared at the letter. No, his team deserved better from their Captain. Their families deserved more than the military benefits for deceased soldiers, but he couldn't do anything in that area. He could, though, make this personal. This team had lasted him the most, had taught him the most, and they deserved every respect he could afford.

The door opened abruptly, and he thought better than to chastise Hange for coming in unannounced, especially at midnight, as was her habit ever since he became Captain three years ago. Most of the time he lost his breath reminding Shitty-glasses to shower or remember her manners, but then again she also wasted her time telling him to rest or smile more often.

They wasted their time, but at least they tried.

He immediately noticed the stack of papers she was carrying, no doubt to refill his pile, and an idea came to mind. "Do you have any empty sheets of paper in there?"

Hange stopped in the middle of his office and looked through the paper. Once she reached the end she breathed a small _aha_. "There's like ten blank sheets here. Why?"

"None of your damn business. Now give me the papers."

She smirked and started leafing through the papers. "Nuh-uh, Levi, I don't think that's how you ask a person favors. Actually, I think I just heard Amina calling me. How time flies by! A second you're––"

"I'm writing letters to the families of my teammates," he grumbled.

Hange's facial expression dropped and she lowered the stack slightly. "Yeah, the templates never do... capture everything we saw in them. You know these go out tomorrow morning, right? Will you have enough time?"

"I'll personally deliver them."

"Do you think that's a good idea?"

Levi sighed and cradled his cheeks with his own hands, allowing himself a rare moment of weakness. It was Hange, anyway; Hange saw everything that wasn't shown. "I don't know. I'm mostly doing this for myself. I don't... I already sleep barely three hours as it is, I don't want to cut that time any shorter."

Hange placed the pile of papers on his desk and sat on one of his chairs, crossing a leg and making herself comfortable. Great, she was here for a chat. "I agree with you, I do think talking to them will make the healing process a bit easier. Not only for you, but for Sakura as well."

He dropped his hands heavily on the desk and sent her an incredulous look. "No, no, that won't do. She's on the verge of breaking as it is. She's my replacement to capture the Female Titan; I can't have her psychologically compromised."

"She already is psychologically compromised, you said that to me yesterday after you went to talk to her. Can it really get any worse?"

He huffed. "The answer is always yes and you know that."

Hange abruptly stood up and grinned. "Well, there's another area where we disagree. You can't just make those types of decisions for her." She turned around and started walking away. "You can't coddle her forever. Remember, she'll be squad leader before we can blink."

He growled, because the murderous expression he was sporting would've been lost on her back. "Of course I can order her around; she's my subordinate for now. Don't meddle into this, Shitty-glasses. She needs to learn how to follow orders before she can start giving them!"

She waved a hand and shot him a smirk before she locked the door. Trust her to be helpful and a pain in his ass in one single meeting. But that was Hange, after all, the one friend that had outlasted all the others.

It took Levi an hour to finish signing the rest of the papers for the families of the deceased. Looking at the stack of papers he had signed during the day, the combined pile, made him very tired. He always hated mental exhaustion the most out of every other type. He _needed _to sleep, but he didn't want to. He refused to. There was so little time left, and so much at stake. He could sleep when he was dead.

He took a sip from his rather cold black tea, and started writing letters to the Jinn, Schultz, Bozado, and Ral families. He had written short letters to the families of his previous squad, but they hadn't been nearly as personal as he had wanted to make them. There had always been a wall in his mind about what he had to do and what he wanted to do, ever since he was a little kid. It protected him from getting hurt, and that meant protected him from other people. In this case he was already hurt, and he had the unfortunate desire to alleviate the pain their families must be feeling. Having that wall also meant he was shit at comforting people the conventional way, but he couldn't pretend to be something he was not. At the same time, he had to allow himself to write almost everything he could, and not write short letters because he was afraid he would insult the families.

He wrote to the Jinn family that Eld was compassionate in the headquarters but ruthless on the fields. He had saved the life of his partner, Gunther, once, from a titan attack that would've killed most of the soldiers in the Survey Corps. But Eld was talented, wanted to kill titans, and wanted to save Gunther, so he succeeded. It was this type of determination that he admired, the one that made near-miracles happen. The world was always better when Eld baked for them as the occasional celebration. Eld was proud of his family and origins, but he was also proud of his girlfriend, Rosalind, to whom he was going to propose when the mission was over. To Rosalind he added that Eld would've wished she mourned him, but also moved on when she felt was right, as there is no use in chasing a ghost.

The Schultz letter was only addressed to his mother, Brigitta, of whom Gunther spoke with reverence. She had raised him in what he said were the most critical points in his life, and had taught him how to be strong, but also a joy. He was almost always the one to lighten up the mood whenever they went outside in the expeditions. He was impatient, and always tried to beat his partner Eld in titan-killing contests, which would end up in entertaining arguments to listen to. He was fiercely protective of his friends and squad mates, a trait that saved lives in their profession, and never hesitated to do what he felt was right, even if what was right made his teammates angry. Though he wasn't the best cook, he enjoyed food with such gusto that the meals always tasted better after he complimented the chef. He was proud of his mother and grandfather for supporting him in his decision to join the Survey Corps because they trusted that he knew what was the right thing to do. And he had died doing the right thing.

Oluo... Oluo, he wrote, was initially one of the most silently arrogant people he met. The type of people who knew their power but did not openly flaunt it, but they could not hide the air of superiority around them.

Levi frowned and stared at what he had written so far. No parent would like to hear that about their child, especially their _dead _child. He sighed and shook his head, confident that he had to continue with his true thoughts.

That was how his initial superior had described Oluo Bozado, ranked second from his graduating class, as soon as he had joined the Survey Corps. A year after Oluo had joined, Levi's team suffered a devastating loss, and he was forced to fill two enormous gaps. He had chosen Oluo two fill one of the two spots because Levi had been observing the 102nd Trainees Squad since the beginning. Oluo, while arrogant, never let anyone behind. He worked harder so that his peers wouldn't have to. He put himself in danger so no one else would. Oluo always boasted that this was because he couldn't trust anyone else to do the job right, but Levi knew what he really was, and he wanted him in his team. Out of all of Levi's decisions, having Oluo on his team was one of his best. He pushed his teammates to improve, he learned to become humbler, and he never left anyone behind, just like Levi thought he would. As time passed, Levi continued writing, he became a sort of unwitting mentor to Oluo. Levi had never felt like someone deserving of admiration, but having someone like Oluo admire him was a great compliment.

It was only until his death that he started leaving people behind, but it was up to all of them to make his memory proud, he finished writing.

Levi got the last piece of paper, but noticed his candle was almost all out. He got a new one out of one his drawers and lit it up slowly, all to avoid writing this last letter. The Jinn, Schultz, and Bozado letters were in a neat pile to his right, already signed and sealed. These letters were hard, but at least he had never met the addressees, not yet, at least. But he had met Petra's father when they came back from the expedition. He had a face that could judge his failure.

Petra Ral, he began, had always acted like a caretaker to the group. He admitted he had forgotten a mother's love, but he'd like to imagine that the love Petra had for her team was close to that. She was warm and supportive, but she was ruthless to all the titans that dared to harm her loved ones. Her skill and power made sure nobody ever was ever harmed, and without her his team chemistry would've suffered tremendously. No matter the person, Petra always had something to talk about. In a group full of killers, she made everyone momentarily forget who they were and what they were killing. He admitted he had never realized how much Petra had devoted herself to him until Philipp Ral had let him known, but he promised to use everything in his power to continue being the person Petra Ral saw in him.

Levi put his quill back in the inkwell and stretched, enjoying the sound of popping bones. Hange had come at midnight, and from the view of the sky, he would guess it was around four in the morning. Writing had taken longer than what he thought, but considering all the small breaks he took and the amount of times he had to refill his inkwell, he wasn't surprised.

Someone knocked on the door, and he prepared himself for the possibility of it being Sakura, the worst possible outcome. Thankfully, it was one of the soldiers, a man of average height with sandy hair.

He saluted immediately. "Captain, I'm here for the letters to the dead family members."

"You come for them so late?" Or early, depending on who he was asking.

"We have to distribute them all around the territory inside Wall Rose. The earlier we start the better."

"Do you know how long it takes to get to Karanase?" They had made the journey from Karanse to the old headquarters in around seven to eight hours, but this in a group and not solo.

"With a speedy horse, it shouldn't take longer than five hours, Captain."

That meant he would spend around ten hours traveling. A lone traveller couldn't be on the road during the night, no matter how skillful, because of roaming groups of bandits. Their prevalence had increased with the fall of Wall Maria, and he didn't feel like dying before they captured Annie Leonhart. Sunrise was in about an hour, giving him ample time to take a shower and get ready for the trip. If he finished his errands by one in the afternoon, he could travel back the same day, avoiding spending the night in an inn.

Levi nodded to the soldier. "Thank you. You're dismissed."

The soldier saluted and gathered the pile of papers for the families of the deceased. He and another teammate would have to categorize the address of the letter to have a semblance of order, and then ten other soldiers would go to distribute them in less than a week. The Survey Corps was the only one who had this system, considering they were the only military branch to constantly receive casualties.

With another rather awkward salute, the soldier left the office, closing the door rather gently. Levi sighed and slumped his shoulders. This was all too much. Kids who could turn into titans; kids who could turn into titans trying to thwart the Survey Corps's progress; bitch who could turn into a titan killing the majority of his squad; bitch who could turn into a titan possibly having sources inside the Survey Corps; Sakura Ackerman possibly being a titan-shifter but denying it; him _trusting _that Sakura Ackerman wasn't a titan shifter. What the hell was going on in the world? The one thing that hadn't recently changed in his life was that he trusted Erwin and Hange was his closest friend. Everything else was shaky.

This was the first time this year he wished he was back underground, back with Farlan and Isabel. Things were certainly stressful and he had his worries, but they were of a different scale. The amount of people he was responsible as the Survey Corps's second-in-command was tiring. The stakes the Survey Corps were starting to get involved with were increasing, and so were the enemies.

He shook his head violently. No, moping around wouldn't help anyone. He detested people who moped, who decided that the world must stop for them just so that they could catch their breath. Mourning was fine; being paralyzed by it was not. This was the path he had chosen, and the one he would stick out with till the bitter end. He would mourn the deaths of his teammates, help stop the enemies of humanity, and fight for a free future.

That had always been his modus operandi since the time he had joined, and it would be so until his death.

Levi got up from his chair, gathered the letters, and went to his room, his slight limp barely slowing him down. The only good thing this castle had over their headquarters was a private bathroom for himself. He took a quick, cold bath, waking up his system from whatever tiredness he had. After putting his uniform on, he put the letters in a traveling bag and headed to the mess hall, which was starting to fill up with the early birds for breakfast.

He allowed to treat himself to two toasts with butter plus a bitter coffee. Usually higher-ranked soldiers had access to more delicious foods, but he never liked getting them. The only luxury he regularly partook with was black tea, but only because he seemed to be the only one in the Survey Corps who enjoyed it. Levi was ahead of schedule, so he took his time with the meal. Asking the head cook for some traveling rations took some time as well, and by the time he was done preparing for his short journey the sun was starting to rise.

Levi went to the stables and his rather optimistic mood immediately plunged. He should've expected it, really should, but for some reason he thought Hange would finally respect his wishes and keep her damn mouth shut.

"What are you doing here, Ackerman?"

Sakura finished saddling Haruto and turned towards him. "I'm coming with you to Karanase."

"And who approved this?"

"Squad Leader Hange did. After Amina told me you were leaving, I asked her if I could come with you. She said she was worried about your injury, and authorized it."

He had to resist the urge to roll his eyes. "So you're my bodyguard?"

"If that's how you want to look at it, Captain."

He walked to Isabel's stall, which was two horses down from Sakura's Haruto. "Go back to your room, Ackerman. We have a long journey ahead in two days and you're taking my spot in the Female Titan's capture."

"I have rested enough these last two days."

"Then practice your 3DMG."

Her green eyes narrowed. "They're my teammates too. I deserve to be there."

"And I deserve a long vacation, but you don't see me throwing tantrums over it. Accept your loss and go back to your room, Ackerman." Normally, this type of behavior would convince him to throw any thought the higher-ups had of making Sakura a squad leader out of the window, but she was grieving, and would give her a break.

Her hold on her horse's reins tightened, forcing Haruto to still uncomfortably. She pursed her lips, then sighed. "Captain, please. I... I owe them something. I promise I'll behave, if that's what you're worried about. And I'll follow every order you give, no matter how much I disagree with it."

Levi knew he should say no. He remembered how much Farlan and Isabel's death had warped him while he dealt with his grief. He had almost killed Erwin, after all. Not saying that Sakura would attempt to kill him, since she obviously knew this was not his fault, but she hadn't been taking her team's death very well. Add to the fact she was the only survivor of the original team, the survivor's guilt must be destroying her internally, and he wasn't in the mood to act as damage control if she exploded during their trip.

But she was giving him her word that she would follow orders, something she had never done willingly, and she had a reputation for keeping her promises. Besides, never being able to apologize to Farlan or Isabel's family had fucked him up. Sure, they were street rats and were each other's family, but having no one to forgive him had made the healing process much longer.

And if she were to become a squad leader, she would have to see firsthand the possible consequences of her orders. This would be a good experience for her. Damn Hange for remind him of that.

He frowned heavily, his mind made up. "Fine, but if you so much as speak when I told you not to I'm sending you back. Understood?"

"Yes, Captain."

"Help me get on Isabel and we'll be on our way."

Sakura did as instructed without a peep and helped. Isabel was ready to go much sooner than what he had expected, and they were soon on their way, the sunrise illuminating the road.

He relied on a mixture of an older map and his own memory to get to Karanase. The roads had changed a little bit ever since titans had broken into Trost, and even more since people starting moving in from the Wall Maria territories. As long as they kept heading east, though, they would eventually reach Karanase district, whether by dumb luck or because a fellow traveler helped them out.

Levi thought the journey was going to be uncomfortably quiet. He didn't have much to talk about with Sakura. They had spent nearly a year as partners, known each other for another year, but he didn't know much about her besides what was on her file and the brief glimpses he got of her person whenever she was around friends. She also didn't know much about him, considering he knew she had painted a picture of an antagonistic Levi in her mind, one that he was just barely starting to defy. He didn't think it mattered much, since their partnership worked in a weird way without needing to have any sort of chemistry. They worked as independent reactions, activated and deactivated without relying on one another.

But the trip wasn't tense. They didn't speak, but neither wanted to. Neither needed to. He had no more words to say to her, and no amount of words would help assuage the pain she was refusing to feel. She had nothing for him either, considering he hadn't ordered her to speak. He was glad she was following his orders so thoroughly for a change, but he didn't feel like the price he paid for her obedience was worth it.

His leg did start to hurt though, and nothing could distract him from the pain.

The sun was almost at its highest point in the sky when they arrived. Now the next part of the trip was finding the houses where they lived, but since Karanase was a fairly organized town, he assumed they wouldn't have much trouble.

Their uniforms drew in unwanted attention. They were on military business, so they couldn't dress up as civilians, but the failure of the 57th Expedition was still so fresh in everyone's minds that they were being viewed with malcontent and pity, an interesting combination. Malcontent he was used to. The Survey Corps has always been viewed as useless and wastes of money considering nobody except the Survey Corps had any hope of regaining lost territory. Pity, though, was a new one.

He wasn't sure whether he liked it or not just yet.

The first house was the Schultz home. Levi detested how quickly Gunther's mother, Brigitta, face fell when she opened the door, as if she already knew what he was going to say. She allowed both him and Sakura in, making them feel at home by offering some water and leftover toast, which he and Sakura had no choice but to accept. Once Brigitta seated at the other side of the table, Levi got a letter out from the small travel bag he brought with him, the one with the word _Schultz _written on it, and handed it to her.

Brigitta's face immediately twisted and she brought both of her hands to her face to cover her tears. Her small frame was wracked with sobs, and Levi had absolutely no idea how to respond. Maybe it had been a bad idea to come here. Maybe he shouldn't have done this. Maybe he should've just handed the letters to that one soldier so that he could deliver them for him.

Sakura sighed. "I met Gunther around two years ago. We played a game of 'guess my story' as a couple of months after he joined the Special Operations Squad, and he told me he had been raised singlehandedly by his mother, with some help from his grandpa in the beginning before he moved a little bit farther away. Gunther said that his life was mostly black and white, except when he ate. Your cooking, he said, was colorful. He had never understood what had brought that color until he joined the military.

Brigitta was bawling by now, the sound so horrendous Levi didn't know how Sakura could keep going, but she did.

"He said the food was bland. It was back to black and white, and he was at his wits end trying to find out why. No matter how much he ate, and the color wouldn't come back, at least until he joined the Special Operations Squad that it regained a little bit of it, but not as much as if you cooked. It was love in adversity that gave it such a vibrant color, he confided in me. That was the biggest question he had in his life, and he found an answer to it."

Her lips turned upwards in a bittersweet smile. "Gunther never found someone else to make his world colorful, but he had you. Some people never get to see beyond the monotony of life, but he did. He even said that you were the only woman he needed in his life. Gunther loved you dearly, and as the person who will kill Gunther's killer, I can tell you it's not in vain."

Her sobs decreased their intensity, until she was hiccuping, but the tears did not stop falling. Sakura got up, walked slowly towards her side, and placed a comforting hand on Brigitta's shoulder. Levi almost missed the soft squeeze that made the hiccups just a little bit more violent. Sakura looked at him, beckoned to the door, and he followed her out without a word, closing the door to the house softly behind him.

Isabel and Haruto were still tied up where they had left them, the perfect picture of obedience. People were passing by, watching them quietly, wondering why two soldiers were in front of the Schultz home. Sakura caressed Isabel's snout, not making a move to mount Haruto.

"You're not going to send me back for that?" she asked, her voice more emotional but still hard.

It was then Levi realized she hadn't followed his orders, though she had saved his ass. He had been shortsighted to think he could comfort family members after a death. No one had ever comforted him when his mom died, when Kenny abandoned him, when his friends died, when his soldiers died. It was normal for him to get over it by himself, without any kind words.

But he was the weird one. Most people comforted others, and he just didn't know how. But Sakura did, even this Sakura who was much more prone to violence than he had ever witnessed.

"No," he finally answered. "If I'm going to finish this, I'm going to need someone who knows what to say." That and his leg was starting to hurt, so he would be exponentially cranky.

She stopped petting Isabel and turned to him. "Everyone knows you're not supposed to speak ill of the dead, but no one knows what you're supposed say to someone who just lost a son, or daughter, or sibling. I was just being honest."

"Then I'll keep you around for that honesty."

He mounted Isabel, and Sakura mounted Haruto, following him without another word.

The Jinn home was next. A young blonde woman opened the door, and tilted her head in confusion. Sakura stiffened slightly, a move he only caught because he was very aware of her presence, and she sighed.

"Hi... What can I do to help–– You! I remember you!" She smiled at Sakura. "You were there when I met Eld!"

Levi internally groaned. So this was Rosalind, the woman Eld was going to propose to. He didn't know if this was better or worse than the parents, but luckily he wouldn't have to do most of the talking.

"Yeah, I was. Can we... Can we come in?"

Rose blinked and put a hand on her cheek. "Oh, dear me! I'm sorry for being so rude! Come in, come in! Do you guys need anything?"

Sakura went in first, her steps more hesitant than when they entered the Schultz home. "Um, no. We're just here for a short visit."

"Oh?"

"You might want to sit," Levi finally said.

Rose's head snapped towards him, as if she had just finally registered he was there. Her brown eyes were confused, until they widened in recognition. "You're Captain Levi, aren't you?"

"Yes."

There was a table with four wooden chairs, and she took the one closest to the entrance. She placed her hands on her thighs and laced her trembling fingers together. "This is about Eld, right. Something happened to him." Rose's voice broke at the end.

"In the last mission... He was killed," Sakura declared, her voice heavy. "We're so sorry."

Rose blinked at them and bit her lip harshly. "There–– There must be a mistake, though. Surely there must! He–– He can't be dead. We... We were just about to start a life together!"

Levi got the letter out from his bag and handed it to her gently. "This is for you and his family."

But she was no longer looking _at _them, but rather through them. Her eyes teared up and she started blabbering. "He... No! I love him! He can't be dead! I love him! After all of this... No!"

Sakura took the letter from his hands and placed it on the table. "I'm sorry, Rose, I really am, but it's true. I... I witnessed it."

Rose snapped her head at her and she snarled. "So how are you here? What, did he die trying to save _you_? Is that what he threw our future away for?"

The pink-haired woman flinched violently as if struck, her face slack with shock.

"No, he died trying to secure a better future for you, his family, and his future family," Levi pitched in harshly. Sure, he understood grief, but he didn't tolerate hurting others just to feel better. He had his work cutout for him when it came to Sakura, and he didn't need Rosa to add to it.

Rosa grit her teeth and cried. "I know, I know, I know, I'm sorry, that's what Eld always said. For me, for him, for everyone. That's what I believed. But my father was right. Military lives are in danger of dying, and military wives are in danger of suffering. I just... I never thought Eld... He was so strong, so agile... Immortal." She hugged her small frame and demanded between heaves, "Please leave."

But Sakura stood there, obviously conflicted between following her request and staying and comforting the distraught woman. Levi grabbed Sakura's elbow and gently led her outside without any resistance.

Their horses were there, perfectly oblivious to what was happening to their owners. There were still two more houses to go to, and now he was sure it was a bad idea to take her to the families of her dead best friends. Bringing Sakura here was a bad idea, period. Not only was she bloodthirsty, but she was breaking a little bit more with every person she encountered. The Survey Corps couldn't afford for her to break, at least before they captured Annie.

"I need to go on," she whispered. "The next two are the most important ones."

Levi frowned and dropped her elbow. "I always knew you were a bit of a masochist, but this is taking it too far, Ackerman. You should go home."

"If I don't I would regret it for the rest of my life. I already regret many things, Captain..." She bit her lip and her head dropped. "I don't want to add more to the list."

His face softened and he had to hold in a sigh. Who was he kidding? There was no way of refusing Sakura Ackerman. In her he saw himself. He knew what was going through her head. He knew how much she was suffering. Erwin had always recommended that he got closer to her so that she could trust him just as much as Levi trusted Erwin, but he had always refused because he didn't want to be an Erwin for Sakura. He wanted to be Levi.

The Survey Corps didn't need another him, but they could use a Sakura, strong and worth dying for, a variation of the formula that created them.

They mounted their horses and headed towards the Bozado home, which was a bit farther away. The sun had already passed the highest point in the sky, meaning it was at least two. It was summer, so sunset was around nine, but he really wanted to be back at the headquarters by eight. The road back was lonely and away from the main road, making them excellent prey for bandits.

Half an hour later and his stomach grumbled slightly. All the drama from the morning had made him forget lunchtime had passed, and he was very hungry. "Do you want to eat lunch somewhere?" he asked Sakura.

"I though we brought rations?"

He remembered what the cook put in his bag and scrunched his nose slightly. That wouldn't do. The day was already shitty; he didn't need more shitty food. "We did, but the Survey Corps won't crash and burn in the ground if we eat somewhere."

She breathed a laugh. "I wouldn't mind a nice stew."

Isabel and Haruto must've been getting used to getting tied up because they did not protest the next time they stopped at a small restaurant. "I'll take care of feeding the horses," he announced. "You order the food."

"What will you be having, Captain?"

"Some bread and salted pork."

She nodded and entered the restaurant, a small one story building with a beat down sign in front of it he thought said _Warm and Cozy. _He took a bucket near the water pump and filled it with water, then carried the water to the small basin near the horses. Isabel and Haruto started drinking greedily without prompt. Levi then went back near the water pump and got a generous amount of hay for the horses and dropped it in the food box. Most of what he was doing was an excess compared to what people fed their horses, but Isabel and Haruto were the reason why he and Sakura were alive today and might have a chance to live tomorrow. They Survey Corps was never stingy with their horses.

Levi washed his hands in the pump, air-dried them, and headed inside. The place was crowded with travelers and all of the bartenders and cooks were furiously doing their job to catch up to the amount of work. Ever since Trost had been attacked by the Colossal Titan, people had moved to other places. Since Karanase was nearby and around the same price range as Trost, the town experienced an influx of people and travelers at unprecedented levels. Good for Karanase's economy, brutal for Trost's.

"Captain!"

Levi turned and saw Sakura wave at him in one of the more removed tables. Good, he didn't like crowded places. Too many variables.

Their table had two cups filled with water, but no food. He sat opposite to her and started drinking, his parched mouth screaming in relief.

"The food is supposed to get here in around ten minutes," she said. "They're really nice, the owners. Said nice things about the Survey Corps."

"That's a new one. No complaints about taxpayer money?"

She gave a fake smile. "Not yet, no. But I wouldn't be surprised. Not after... Well, my failure."

He raised an eyebrow. "Last time I checked, the Survey Corps was a military branch, not a pink-haired woman."

Her green eyes hardened. "Maybe not, but I am a member of the Special Operations Squad. I'm supposed to get rid of dangers."

Survivor's guilt. _It should've been me. I could've saved them. I'm powerful. _Yes, he was used to thinking that, used to hearing that, but that did not make it any easier to deal with. "I'm letting you spearhead the effort against the Female Titan. What else do you want?"

She frowned. "Let me kill the one who killed my squad."

"I thought we agreed you would drop that."

"I know, but you asked me what else I wanted and I answered honestly."

Yes, honesty, what had gotten him into this mess to begin with. Because he trusted her, and recently found that she wasn't being wholly trustworthy. "It won't change anything. It won't make you feel better."

"Everyone says that. How does everyone know it's not going to help me feel better? Did everyone become an expert in revenge?"

A small, chubby man approached their table and placed their dishes in front of them. Sakura got chicken soup and he got his salted pork with bread. "If you need anything, just yell, okay?" he offered with a jovial smile, then left after they said thank you.

His interruption was the best time to let the subject drop, but he didn't want to. For some reason, Levi didn't want her to head down that path. It twisted people and brought them even more guilt and regrets. Sakura was ranked third in the short list of people he was friends with and was the closest thing to a living legacy he had, and he wasn't about to let her go to waste. If he ever died, he could rest somewhat easily that humanity was in good hands (though that thought had recently been challenged by the immense secret that hung over her head).

"I––"

"I once killed four men because they killed my grandmother and set our house on fire," she admitted after drinking some of her stew. The confession startled him. That hadn't been on her file, and he didn't imagine Sakura of all people to have killed humans. "They wanted to extort the nearby lands, and we were the first show of their power. Almost no one knew them, and nobody knew they were dead. The best scenario for a revenge."

"Where are you going with this?"

"Nobody cares about the farmlands as long as they're producing food. If I hadn't killed those men, who knows how many more families would've suffered because of them. My revenge protected others, and it gave me the will to fight for what was mine. I doled out justice. If Annie Leonhart dies, would it really be so bad?"

"Yes," he answered without hesitation. "Annie Leonhart doesn't threaten the farmlands; she threatens humanity. But she isn't the only one. If you had only tracked down one of the extortioners, would you have killed him or kept him alive in exchange of the location of the other three?"

Her brow furrowed, and her spoon stopped midair. "I would've kept him alive."

"Then let's keep Annie Leonhart alive." At least until they find the rest, Levi thought.

The silence only lasted for a few seconds before Sakura asked, "What were you going to say before?"

"Did you feel better? Did killing them actually make you feel better?" That wasn't what he was going to say before she interrupted him. He was about to entrust her with the story of the death of his closest friends Isabel and Farlan as a story to tell her that killing the titan didn't make him feel better, and he had stopped himself from killing Erwin because he believed in his dream. But perhaps that would be a story for another time.

Now that he was in better control of his emotions, he didn't feel right in telling Sakura such a sensitive part of his life yet.

"That's not the point. The point was justice. They killed a person, I killed them."

Levi's eyes narrowed. Sakura was growing more delusional the more she talked, and he didn't like the sound of that. "You're not interested in justice. If you were, you wouldn't have joined the Survey Corps and you would be one of those protesters against the nobility. You even have a noble friend, the Burgeis. So don't start spouting bullshit that you're interested in justice."

Every word he spoke made her face a bit slacker, but her eyes started getting fiery. "Why do you care? If I'm lying about that, why do you _care_? You never do. Whenever I do something wrong, you look the other way as long as I don't fuck up another person. So why are you wasting your time trying to tell me I'm wr––"

"Because I've killed people, many more than you have." His admission shut her up, even though she seemed to want to say more. "For survival, I thought. It's either them, or me. And I was right, because by the time the deaths piled up, they were after me. Someone taught me how to kill, but he didn't teach me _who _to kill. So I thought everyone who wanted to harm me was free game."

He bit into his bread and chewed violently. "But it fucks you up. Every life you take and you feel less human. You are less human. Sooner than later you're as bad as the people you give out this 'justice' to. What started out as a good idea makes you a criminal. And then you wonder if Mikasa would really want to have a sister who gives herself so easily to the monster we all carry within."

"Don't you dare bring Mikasa into this," she snarled quietly. "She has nothing to do with this."

"But she does. So does Eren. And Petra, and Oluo, and the Burgeis. Gunther, Eld, Erwin, me, Hange. Maybe the people who know us the least judge us the harshest, but those who know us the most judge the least and hurt the most."

His words struck a chord in her. He knew he was right. She knew he was right. Sure, that didn't get rid of the feelings. The anger, the fury, the grief. Nothing would, and only time would soften the blow. But vengeance wasn't the way, not in this case, and not for Annie Leonhart's sake, but for Sakura's. She had already lost a bit of her humanity; no need to take more away.

Though he knew he should've been disappointed in finding out the soldier he admired wasn't as good as he thought, he felt relieved. Sure, it was selfish and petty, to feel better in the downgrade of another's image, but she was more relatable now. She wasn't innocent like he thought she would be. It seemed that those from Shiganshina knew more about the carnage of life than they let on.

They were on the same level, and he felt good about being equals.

"Only three people know about what I did, and one of them is dead," she admitted quietly, her face devoid of any black fire. "I guess I'm not proud of it. I mean, there's a reason why I hid the evidence. I never even told..." she trailed off, and started eating what was left of her stew.

Levi harrumphed. "There would be something seriously wrong with you if you were proud of killing people."

She smiled humorlessly, but at least there was a smile. She stared down at her soup, her hair masking her face. "Yeah, there's plenty wrong, but not that, at least. Who knew you could be so... wise."

"You thought I was all brawn and no brains?"

"Yeah."

"We didn't get to become second-in-command just by being good killers."

Sakura looked up at him and offered a real, small smile. "Yeah."

Damn.

They finished the rest of the lunch in comfortable silence. Levi paid for their meals and the horse's feed, shutting down Sakura's complaints by saying this was coming from military spending and not personal savings, which shut her up. Haruto and Isabel were now surrounded by other horses but they weren't uncomfortable. They saddled up and went on their way to the Bozado home.

He could hear children yelling as they got closer to his home, or what the locals said was his home, and Levi honestly did not like the sound of that. Children weren't his forte. He knew how to handle adults and titans, but children were a different monster. It was now he remembered Oluo talking about his six siblings, and he almost groaned out loud.

Sakura was the first one to unmount and tie Haruto to a nearby pole. She strode to the front door and knocked softly, with Levi trailing behind. The house was two stories, wooden. The house of a family that was well-off. A teenage boy with dirty blond hair and mischievous eyes opened the door, and he spluttered, "Sakura Ackerman?"

"And you must be Thomas. Enjoying your summer break?"

Thomas opened the door a little bit wider to allow them in, which they promptly did. "Uh, yeah." He closed the door and beckoned to the couch. The house was devoid of children and parents.

"How was your first year with the Training Corps?"

"Good. I, uh, ranked second. Told Oluo already."

"I couldn't make him shut up for more than five minutes, that's how much he was bragging."

Thomas smiled and shifted awkwardly. "I'm glad he was. But, listen, Miss Sakura––"

"Just Sakura."

"Sakura. Not that I don't appreciate you coming here... You and...?"

It took Levi an embarrassing three seconds to realize Thomas was referring to him. "Levi."

"Captain Levi!" he exclaimed. "Sorry! I just thought you would be a bit ta–– Uh, never mind. But, um, why are you here?"

Two dead Bozados would make the family very sad.

"Where are your parents, Thomas?"

"Mom and Dad took everyone out for a little trip to the river. You just missed them, actually. I'm too old for that stuff, so I stayed."

Sakura looked at him, and nodded. Levi took out the letter from the small bag he carried and handed it to Thomas. "I'm sorry, Thomas, but your brother died in our last expedition."

"What?"

"Oluo is gone," Sakura repeated, and he heard her voice break at the end.

He gaped at them. "But... Oluo... Not him. He said he was the best. He said nothing would kill him... He promised to watch me graduate."

Levi knew Oluo had been one of Sakura's best friends. Already he could see the tears forming, ones she had held in for far too long, but would not let fall. Whatever magical words of encouragement Sakura had prepared would not leave her mouth. But she had saved his ass in the last two visits, now it was his turn.

He stood up and placed a heavy hand on Thomas's shoulder. The boy was already crying, but his face was still slack from shock. "Your brother was a great man. He used his skills to save people. Thanks to him we're one step closer to reclaiming Wall Maria. If we made a list with the names of the most pivotal people in our campaign, his would be very high.

"But he fought for his family. At the end of the day, what made him happiest was to receive letters from his family. You made one of the best soldiers I know incredibly proud. Continue that. And when you graduate, we'll be there," he finished with a promise, and dropped his hand from his shoulder.

Thomas swallowed roughly, and wiped his eyes of tears. The boy must've felt the need to not cry in front of his superiors, but what was he? Fifteen? Hell, he should be sobbing. Most people didn't deal with death. Then again, most people didn't have family members in the Survey Corps.

"Did... Did he ever tell Petra? I know I'm not supposed to say anything but... What's the point now? Did he tell Petra he loved her?"

Sakura licked her lips and wiped her eyes. "Yes."

"What did she say?"

"'Me too,'" Sakura whispered.

Thomas turned around and headed for the stairs. "Um, I'm sorry. I just... I just need to be alone. You guys can stay as long as you'd like. Close the door when you leave." The blond dragged his feet up the creaky stairs, and after a couple of seconds a door was opened and closed quietly.

"Petra and Oluo..." Something was off about that. He knew he may have not been on top of everything that went on with his team ––who was?–– but he would know if his subordinates were in a romantic relationship. First of all, he needed to know to forbid it, and second was he really that clueless?

Sakura turned at him with incredulous eyes, but then smiled knowingly, as if something suddenly made sense. "You didn't catch on that Liesel and Jung were together either."

"They were?"

"But no, Petra and Oluo weren't together," she whispered just in case Thomas could hear them, ignoring his question. "She pinned for someone else, someone who would never give her the time of day."

"Sounds like an asshole."

Sakura laughed humorlessly, and a tear managed to sneak out. "Usually I would agree with you, but today I feel like the asshole. I just lied to my best friend's brother."

He got tired of standing and took a seat in the couch, keeping his distance from Sakura. "At this point, I don't think it would've made much of a difference."

"Can we stay here for just a little bit? I'm... I don't think I'm ready to face Mr. Philipp just yet."

"Aren't you afraid of the Bozados coming back?"

"They just left to the river. They shouldn't be back in at least two more hours."

"We have to leave Karanse before four. We'll leave in ten minutes."

"Understood, Captain."

Levi pointedly ignored Sakura's crying, trying to give the woman as much privacy as he could afford. This was the first time he had seen her cry, and it was strangely humbling. He knew Sakura was a person obsessed with keeping the appearance of a wall: strong, durable, reliable, unyielding, imposable and dividing. To see that picture crumbling before his very eyes... Well it wasn't exactly enjoyable, but he appreciated the thought. He liked having friends that trusted him and he trusted them not to die.

"Time's up."

She sniffled quietly one last time and stood up, wiping her eyes furiously, then headed out briskly. Levi closed the door behind him, loud enough so that Thomas would hear they're gone, and mounted Isabel.

This last visit was going to be the hardest one, and he knew. He may have been clueless as to Oluo's feelings for Petra (how was he supposed to know?) but he knew that those three were a tight-knit group of friends. Maybe they weren't as close as he had been with Farlan and Isabel, but the comparison was unfair, since the two groups came from different backgrounds.

Petra had been the warm glue that kept them together.

And she had died before Sakura and her could fully make amends from whatever it was they fought about.

They arrived at the Ral home far too quickly. Sakura's eyes were bloodshot, but she was determined to finish this, even if she needed a helping hand. They knocked on the door and sure enough, Philipp Ral opened the door far too quickly.

The man had dark bags under his eyes, and his brown hair looked dull. He wordlessly let them in and shut the door quietly behind them. The house was pristine, but there was something off about it, something Levi couldn't quite place.

Philipp led them to the small living room and sat on the one-seater, leaving Levi to sit with Sakura on a rather small sofa. There was a table in the middle of the living room, with a single white envelope, stark against the emptiness of the house

This situation was rather different than the previous three. Whereas before they bore ill news, Philipp had already received them the day they came back. This visit should be the shortest, but Levi was far too jaded to think that optimistically.

"Petra likes coming back to a clean home," Philipp began in a conversational tone. "I admit I'm not the cleanliest of people, but this one time I wanted Petra to be happy to see this place. So I cleaned. She always cleaned, Petra. I think she looked after me more than I looked after her. You see, my wife ––Petra's mom–– died when she was little." Philipp sighed deeply, and Levi shifted a bit, relieving some of the tension in his body. "I knew it was coming, but she probably thought it was just a fever. I wish it had just been a fever.

"But my wife didn't truly die that day. Petra is a spitting image of her mother. She also has her fire. And her discipline. And her protective instinct. And her love of the broken and hurt. Petra's mom was a doctor. Her love of the hurt made her get an illness she couldn't heal. And Petra... Well, she had a knack for burrowing her way into broken people's hearts to try to heal them. The kid who lost his pet, and Petra was friends with them. The widower, Petra always talked to him. Honig loved Petra as much as they had loved my wife. Whatever love my wife had for people, Petra inherited.

"I admit I was uncomfortable when Petra told me she wanted to join the military. Her mother was a doctor; her dad a tailor. What business did she have joining the military? She tried to tell me the goal was to land a spot in the Military Police but I knew she was lying. I knew she was unconsciously following her mother's footsteps yet again. Petra grew bored of Honig; not enough people needed her to feel like she had a purpose. And I needed her to be happy, so I gave her my blessing and told her to go.

"Petra told me you were always in incredible pain, Sakura." The pink-haired woman's head snapped up, her eyes red from crying and her tears flowing quickly down her cheeks. Well, that was an incredibly weird thing to say to his dead daughter's best friend. "That like everyone else, you tried to hide it. And you hid it well. I couldn't believe the girl Petra spoke so hauntingly about could've been as happy as the girl Petra introduced me too all those years ago. But I knew looks were deceiving. Petra said you needed her, and I knew that she needed you too. She needed you to give her life purpose. Sounds incredible selfless and selfish at the same time, but that was my wife, and that was Petra.

"Then she met you." Philipp Ral looked straight at Levi's eyes without flinching, a feat no many could boast about. Philipp's eyes weren't mad with grief, or as cold as ice. They were warm, as if he was recounting a bedtime story. Sakura, though, bowed her head and started sobbing quietly, leaving Levi without backup on how to deal with Philipp. "She told me that while Sakura screamed for help, you screamed for people to leave you alone. If there is something people like Petra seek is the impossible patient, the one everyone has tried to save but failed. I think Petra found her impossible patient in you, Captain Levi. And she imagined there would be a great satisfaction in saving you. Sakura became Petra's closest friend, so who would you become?"

A lull descended on Philipp's therapeutic talking, but Levi _needed _to interrupt it. Sakura was crying just as quietly as before, but he was starting to hate the sound, more than he hated how awkward Philipp was making him feel. Why the hell would he tell Levi that_ he _was her _impossible patient_? A great satisfaction to save him? What the hell? "Did Petra tell you all of this?"

"Some of it, yes, but most of it no. But, before you question the entirety of it, remember that I married Petra's mother, and Petra is my daughter. If there is someone who knows Petra better than she knows herself, it's me."

"Then why are you telling us this?"

"You two were unknowingly one of the most important people in Petra's life. You helped her become more independent than she was here in Honig, Sakura, but your happiness meant her happiness. And she would want you to be happy."

Levi inwardly cringed when Sakura's sobs became a bit louder. Whatever restrains she had in the last two days immediately became undone. Maybe now that she was letting go of her emotions she would let go of this disturbing need for revenge. But her unraveling was uncomfortable for him to witness. At first it was interesting to know Sakura trusted him to view her at her lowest... Now he didn't know what to do.

Not only that, but there was something very off about Philipp. It could very well be grief, but the damage was done, and Sakura was a mess.

He awkwardly got the letter from his bag and handed it to Philipp, who accepted it enthusiastically. "I know it doesn't make up for anything, ever, but your daughter's sacrifice will forever be remembered. Now, if you'd excuse us, we––"

"That letter on the table," he interrupted, pointing at it. "It's for you." He picked it up and handed it to Sakura, who looked as if she was holding pure gold. "Petra always brought a new letter, just in case she died. I have one for Amina, and one for Oluo... Though from what I heard, I won't be able to give it to Oluo. She told me you could only read it once you were ready, though I don't know what it means. If you could tell Amina to stop by and come for her letter, that would be wonderful."

"We could deliver it for you," Levi offered. He didn't want the Burgeis to come here... He didn't want _anyone _to come here. Philipp was mad with grief, even if he didn't give the impression, and he would bring more madness to those around him.

He shook his head. "I never met Amina. I would like to meet her."

Not alone, that's for sure. "I'll let her know," he declared stiffly. "Now, if you'd excuse us, Mr. Ral, we have a long road ahead."

"Are you sure you would not like to stay the night? I have an empty room you two could share."

"Yes, very sure. Right, Sakura?"

Levi turned to look at Sakura and almost groaned when he saw how blankly she was staring at the letter in her hands. She probably didn't even register the conversation going on.

"Sakura?"

Her head snapped up. "Yes, Captain?"

"We have to leave now... Right?"

"Yes, Captain."

He stood up from the couch, and Sakura echoed his action slowly. He shook hands with Philipp, whose eyes were calm with madness, and gave Sakura a hug, which she tightly returned. They left the Ral home without looking back, and mounted their horses, then started their journey back to the headquarters.

There was a part of Levi that wanted to discuss what the hell had happened inside the Ral home, but there was a bigger part of him that wanted to ignore the whole conversation. Whether Petra really saw him as a case rather than a person he didn't know, and he would never know. Philipp seemed to have a very biased view of his own daughter. Considering both his daughter and wife died in a little bit more than ten years, it was understandable that he was angry, furious even. And it was okay to take that anger out on the person who caused it, that being Petra.

But that didn't mean he had to eat up his lies just like that. Petra had never once looked at him with pity. If she had, he would've never allowed her in his squad.

But Philipp wasn't completely wrong, either. Petra's happiness did depend a lot on Sakura's, for some reason. It transcended the realm of friendship, and was closer to sisterhood.

They were back on the woods, away from Karanase and the emotionally draining families, when he finally deemed it safe enough to talk. He slowed down Isabel's hard gallop to a soft trot so that she could hear him. "You didn't believe him, did you?"

Sakura followed suit, slowing Haruto. "It doesn't matter," Sakura answered in a surprisingly strong voice. He risked a glance to his side and was surprised to see the previously sobbing woman back to her strong mask. "Whether he's right or wrong, it doesn't make any difference to how much I love Petra. If she did view me as a broken person in need of mending, I don't care, because we were best friends. I hope you don't think today was a bad idea, Captain."

"Funny, that's _exactly _what I was thinking."

"It's not. I needed to see them. I needed to see their reactions. I needed to hear them."

"You became unresponsive in the Ral home." Unresponsive being a nice way of saying "you wailed like a baby." He wasn't stupid enough to kick Sakura down when she was on the floor. Well, that and wasn't that big of an asshole, at least to someone he considered a maybe-friend.

Sakura was quiet for a bit before saying, "And that was very embarrassing, but I'm not sorry. I needed to vent."

"You shouldn't feel bad for being human."

"Then why have you been on my case about the whole revenge situation? It's human to want revenge."

Here they go again. "First, because I offered you to let you torture her as long as you leave her alive, and you accepted." Well, okay, that was a lie. Annie Leonhart couldn't be tortured because according to Eren Jaeger, pain triggered his transformation to a titan. Whether it was the same for her they didn't know, and they didn't want to find out, so they would use different interrogation tactics. But Sakura didn't need to know that.

"Second, it's exactly because I think you should be human that you shouldn't deprive yourself of humanity."

"But––"

"Have you noticed I've been starting to treat you more like an equal than a subordinate? It's not coming out of nowhere, Sakura. There's a change in the Survey Corps coming along, and people will look up at you for leadership. Erwin has already considered making you a Squad Leader if one of us should die."

"Even though you don't trust me?"

"Even though neither of us trusts you _completely_. We haven't forgotten your service, or your ability to sense titans. But, what I'm trying to say is that you have a future in the top. And people don't respect those that have dirtied themselves with blood."

"She's the _enemy_," she hissed.

"She's like Eren. She's a titan-shifter. And if you preached that Eren is human, then the same tune must be sung for Annie Leonhart."

"Understood, Captain."

No, she didn't, and if she didn't understand when it was time to make the decision, he would _make _her understand.

* * *

><p>They had to be secretive, and for that they needed to be in a disguise. Amina and Sakura were wearing puffy civilian dressed to hide their uniform and 3DMG. Sakura was also wearing a head cover to hide her hair, a very defining feature that would no doubt attract Annie should she see her. As an added bonus, Sakura was masking her chakra to make her seem like a civilian, something she didn't think she had to do, but considering Annie could sense her, she needed every added precaution.<p>

Due to her disturbing need for revenge, Levi had decided to place her as the last resort of the Survey Corps. She was stationed near Wall Sina, and her job was to bring Annie down should she attempt to escape. Levi told her this was the only position where it wouldn't look a complete failure if Annie was killed, though he expected her to do better.

How he could go from comforting to an asshole was a true mystery.

Erwin had allowed her to choose her partner, and she had chosen Amina without a second thought. Not only the Captain was out of commission, but Amina was the only one that knew how she fought, and had good chemistry with her. Though Sakura was curious as to how well Mikasa fought, she wasn't ready to find out in such a risky mission.

"These dresses are so stuffy," Amina complained as they walked down the streets. The Stohess district, one of the poorest districts in Wall Sina, was so much more luxurious than anything Sakura had seen in her life. Hearing Amina complain about her beautiful yellow dress was added to the atmosphere. "I mean, I know we have a budget, but..."

"Missing your high court dresses?"

"I _loved _those dresses. Now I just hate them. Absolutely no mobility. What if you need to fight for your life?"

"I don't think people fight in balls."

"And that's why people die in ball fights. If you don't plan for every scenario, you're just going to be at a disadvantage."

Sakura laughed quietly, careful to not attract the attention of others walking with them on the street. "Titan-shifters exist, after all."

"And ninjas."

She frowned and slapped Amina's arm lightly. "Don't say that loudly."

Amina huffed, sending her a glare. "Oh, please, as if anyone knows what that even means."

"Still––"

The ground rumbled, and people started screaming from the norther side of the district. Plan A had failed, then, and with that failure the civilian casualties started. Hopefully the Military Police would focus on evacuating civilians meanwhile they continued on to Plan B.

"Squad Leader Hange must be excited for this opportunity. She doesn't get many times to shine and show her toys."

"You wish you've been there?"

"No, she has Moblit, and you have me. Now let's just hope Plan B doesn't fail. We should change."

People around them started leaving the streets, their faces openly showing fear, probably going home. The two women helped each other undress, leaving the dresses behind for their military uniform.

"Sakura, between you and me, is the objective to capture her or kill her?"

She sighed. Levi said she was first in line to become squad leader should one of them step down or die. Most soldiers would be excited, but she wasn't most soldiers. Still, it was a great honor. She knew that her reputation had been smeared recently with the framing, and the squad leaders had their doubts about who Sakura was, but even then, they trusted her. She didn't know if that made them stupid or desperate, but she appreciated the reward for all of her hard work.

"Capture her," she declared. She had a future in the Survey Corps. She wouldn't let Annie ruin another thing in her life. "If something happens I'll kill her."

"Roger." She looked around at the empty streets and cocked her head to the side. "By the way, isn't Eren supposed to be part of Plan B?"

"Realistically, yes. Optimistically, no. He might get in the way of Annie's capture, since he's such a wild card. So he's part of Plan Contain Annie,"

"For once things are going better than what we expected."

"Plan A did fail, remember."

"Nobody actually believed that Plan A was going to succeed, though. That would've been far too lucky."

They quieted when they heard heavy footfalls getting closer to the southern side of Stohess. "We should get in position. I don't think Plan B succeeded," Sakura ordered and got out her blades.

Amina followed her to a bridge overlooking the marketplace in front of Wall Sina, which was now empty. At least some civilians had taken the initiative to evacuate, but Sakura knew many would be very unlucky. But their sacrifice would be worth it. Everyone's sacrifice, in the end, would be worth it.

At least that's what she kept telling herself to keep believing in the Survey Corps.

A mighty roar shook the buildings, and another set of heavy steps joined the first. Eren had shifted into a titan, then, and they were coming this way. Erwin had told them about the possibility of this development, and advised them to stay out of the fight between Annie and Eren. That made their jobs considerably easier, but she didn't want Eren to have all the work, or have all the danger.

"They're getting closer," Amina whispered.

Sakura glanced at her, taking special notice of the way her hands shook, of the fear in her dark brown eyes eyes, of the beads of sweat running down her dark skin. This was probably the most amount of danger Amina had ever been in, higher than when they captured those titans, and Sakura had willingly put her in the position for selfish reasons.

"Why didn't you refuse?"

Amina snapped her head towards her, her short black hair sticking to the back of her neck. "And leave you behind? Are you serious? I would've been offended if you hadn't chosen me."

"Offended but safe."

She groaned and massaged her forehead. "Listen, you need to stop it with that bullshit attitude of yours. You're not perfect. You're not a god. You can't go around padding the walls so that I don't get hurt. You can't feel responsible every time I'm in danger. I'm a fucking Survey Corps soldier with an impressive kill count, not a princess in need of saving. Yeah, I'm scared, but honestly only insane people wouldn't, and you've been on that list for a very long time. Damn, for all the times you complained that Mikasa coddled Eren too much, you sure play the hypocrite very well."

Some people would've been very offended by the way Amina spoke, but Sakura was used to her best friend, and found her bluntness refreshing. "It's just... I'm a ninja. I have all of this power––"

"That you can't use because people would ostracize you and hunt you the moment they find out. So, there, cut it out and fucking trust me to not die for once." The steps became louder, loud enough that they knew the titan-shifters would be in front of them in a matter of seconds. "We'll talk later."

Sakura nodded and prepared her body for the attack, relaxing all of her joints and muscles. She felt chakra signatures getting closer to their position, one of them being Erwin's. They could relax in that case, because even if he was accompanied by Military Police, they wouldn't stop them.

The Female Titan appeared on the marketplace, another titan hot on her trail. The dark-haired titan ––Eren, Sakura realized with awe–– launched himself at her and squeezed the Female Titan's head until it popped, spraying blood on the floor.

This violent, roaring titan was Eren, the boy she had trained years ago. She still couldn't believe he was so... powerful. Powerful and menacing. She understood why so many people had been fearful of Eren, why they wanted to kill him. Eren in his titan form was a monster, even if he was on their side.

Military Police ran towards their position, Erwin and Levi in tow, the black-haired man's limp barely noticeable. One of the soldiers wore a red bolo, and if her memory served her well, this was Nile Dok, commander of the Military Police, the man who had tried to take Eren away from her.

The Female Titan started roaring, scaring some of the Military Police soldiers that surrounded them. Erwin, however, had the face of someone who knew what he was doing.

The Female Titan managed to escape Eren's hold and kicked him, slamming him against a building. Free from his grasp, Annie crystallized her fingers and started scaling the wall, hoping to escape to Wall Rose.

Sakura readied her 3DMG but stopped when Erwin placed a staying hand on her shoulder. Confused, Sakura snapped her head towards him, trying to read his face. Erwin pointed to the middle with his other hand, and Sakura followed his finger. Mikasa had beat her to the chase, her form flawless as she approached the Female Titan and cut her fingers in two fell swoops. She had heard of how great Mikasa was, but to see her in action made her chest swell with pride. Mikasa used her 3DMG with the grace of a ninja, a grace Sakura had given her after years of training.

"Sometimes it's necessary to allow the rookies take charge," Erwin commented and let his hand fall from her shoulder. "Gives them experience they otherwise would never get."

From the corner of her eye she was Amina fold her arms, obviously annoyed. She usually didn't see much action; she must've been excited to face the Female Titan. Sakura, however, was just grateful she didn't have to worry about losing her remaining best friend.

Once the Female Titan was back on the ground, Eren punched her with such force that both her head and arm went flying off, the arm landing exactly where Sakura and everyone else was. Most of the Military Police ran away at the face of such gore, but Nile Dok and the three Survey Corps soldiers stared ahead, their eyes hard.

Though Annie was incapacitated, the force behind the attack had deprived Eren of his last hand. Now they would need to wait for Eren to regenerate his hands, but that should take a shorter time than waiting for Annie to regrow a head.

Sakura's ninja eyes caught a blonde who appeared out of nowhere on top of Annie's nape. Upon closer inspection, Sakura realized the blonde looked similar to the Female Titan, too similar for it to be a coincidence. The blonde was also wearing a Military Police jacket and was equipped with 3DMG, which she used to cut the nape open with supernatural speed.

"What the hell?" Levi muttered from beside Erwin.

The pink-haired ninja shot her 3DMG to a nearby buidlng and headed down there to investigate. Besides Levi and maybe Mike, nobody was crazy enough to head to the middle of a titan fight, but Sakura was confident enough that she would not die.

In the time it took her to get to the middle of the fight, the blonde cut the flesh that surrounded Annie as fast as a ninja would. Sakura felt a chill when she realized the blonde and Annie looked exactly the same. Annie Leonhart did not have a twin, right?

Then how the hell where there two of her?

Annie was disorientated, a natural side effect of being in a titan. Sakura took this chance to speed up and land her attack, but was surprised when the clone clashed her swords head-on with Sakura. She managed to push Annie away, but lost her balance with the 3DMG, forcing her to let go and land on the ground rather awkwardly.

The Annie that stood on top of the Female Titan locked eyes with her and then disappeared in a way Sakura had seen before, her chakra flaring to levels Sakura had never felt.

Body-flicker.

Sakura noticed Annie started running up the wall, her feet obviously coated with chakra to stick to the wall. The arms that held her swords unconsciously weakened from the shock. Annie was an actual ninja? What? That was impossible! Everyone in this world had chakra, but no one possessed the ability to use it. That's how ninjas worked, right? Besides, Annie had never given off a chakra signature like hers... Well, until she body-flickered, which meant that––

The clone slashed again, and Sakura belatedly dodged, but the clone managed to land a nasty gash on her left arm, but Sakura felt no pain.

Her chest warmed and she body-flickered behind the clone, easily slashing it. The clone disappeared with a puff, and her worst fears were confirmed.

Annie was a ninja, and she had purposely masked her chakra to avoid detection. Since Sakura never felt the need to keep her ninja status hidden by lowering her chakra signature, Annie knew the moment she was nearby that Sakura was a ninja.

Though the fight had been long in Sakura's mind, it was actually quite short considering they fought with ninja speed. She looked up and saw Annie "jump" from Wall Sina, and though everyone else might think it was suicide, she obviously was running down the wall the same way she had scaled it.

Annie had tricked her, had her pegged like a fool. Annie thought she would get away because Sakura had kept her ninja status a secret for a long time. Even with 3DMG, there was no way a soldier could catch up with her, even if she was weak from creating a shadow clone.

Unfortunately for her, she was no normal soldier.

She sheathed her swords and copied Annie's method to scale the wall, her ninja speed ten times faster than the 3DMG. She didn't care anymore if people knew she was a ninja. She didn't care if they treated her like Eren, or worse than him. She didn't care if her possible position as squad leader was as good as gone. She had one goal, and she would do whatever she could to find it out.

Sakura would find out what Annie's secret was, no matter what it took.

What would happen to them afterwards...

She finished scaling the wall, passing Mikasa quickly. Bits of the wall came falling off, forcing Sakura to change her trajectory, and she saw a giant titan inside the wall. Normally, this type of revelation would force her to immediately stop and stare at the wall in horror, but she had more pressing matters; Annie was getting away and she couldn't afford to be dumbstruck.

Sakura landed lightly at the top and stared at the expanse of the human territory, trying to locate Annie's signature. She must obviously be masking it, and since she was weak from splitting her chakra with that clone, she would have an easier time evading Sakura's capture.

Easier, but she would be captured, Sakura knew it.

Mikasa landed next to her, her face shocked. "Sakura––"

"You know what I must do," she interrupted forcibly, her voice enraged. "And you must explain it to them. Tell the truth, Mikasa. All of it. You'll be dragged into something ugly, and for that I'm sorry, but you telling the truth will help you out."

"Are you coming back?"

She tried to hide it, but Mikasa's voice had an undertone of fear to it. Losing family members was something Mikasa knew since she was a child. Though they had their fight over Eren, Mikasa would never want her to leave her.

Sakura didn't know if she would be coming back. Annie could kill her, or take her away like she planned in the 57th Expedition, and if she did come back, things would never be the same. If she did come back, with or without Annie, she would certainly be imprisoned and interrogated. Humans always hated that which they never understood.

"Of course," she replied, and the statement felt like a truth and a lie at the same time.

She felt different chakra signatures scaling the wall with their 3DMG. She recognized one of them: Levi. That man should seriously focus on healing rather than trying to berate her.

"Tell Levi I'm sorry for throwing away his chance," Sakura said quickly, knowing her time was running out. But she needed to say everything. She didn't know if she would get another chance. "Tell Armin he's brave. Tell Eren he's not a monster. And, Mikasa..." Sakura hugged her immobile sister. "I love you. Be safe. And careful about that wall."

Mikasa hugged her back tightly, and let her go when she heard the gas of a 3DMG. Her shirt was bloodied from the wound in Sakura's arm, but neither of them cared.

Sakura approached the edge of the wall, and someone landed at the top. Sakura turned around and saw Levi, his eyes wide with confusion. She nodded and smiled at the two black-haired titan-killers, then body-flickered down the wall, her feet coated with chakra.

"Wait!" he yelled.

_No, Levi,_ Sakura thought, the wind harsh in her face, _no more waiting_.

There was no time for waiting.

* * *

><p><em>In hindsight, I should've stayed there.<em>

_If I stayed, maybe none of this would've happened._

_Maybe I wouldn't have met _them_, maybe I wouldn't have come _here_, maybe I wouldn't be torn between two worlds._

_Maybe I wouldn't have become a complete Vessel._

* * *

><p><strong>Phew, that was the longest chapter I've written, I think. Completely deserved, because this is the end of the second "arc," plus included a major reveal. More reveals to follow. <strong>

**As you may know, this is where the first season of SnK ends, and the manga continues. Since I'm sure none of you want to wait till 2016 for this story to be updated, I will warn the anime-watchers that the story will spoil a lot of things. The anime ended around chapter 33-34, and the manga is currently in chapter 71. **

****_After this chapter spoilers will be everywhere. If you're waiting for the anime to catch up, I would stop reading _The Vessel_ and move on to other stories, then start again when the anime comes back in a year._****

**For those that are up-to-date with the manga, but have rightly forgotten most of what happened after Stohess, I will briefly mention the biggest events in the story through the eyes of the second POV for _The Vessel: _Levi. Writing a no-bullshit Levi is a welcome change over writing the melodramatic Sakura. Worry not, I won't rewrite the manga, but I can't just leave the Survey Corps in the air meanwhile Sakura focuses on tracking Annie, especially since it's AU.**

**I've recently opened a tumblr account (recently as in today so it's literally empty) to better communicate with you guys the readers. Fanfiction is not the best communication site, so if you guys want to ask any questions my username is whiteinkpenpal (I'll also post the link on my profile). I'll answer questions about any of my stories, post drabbles and other goodies that don't make the story, and update on the completion of future chapters. Also I'll be writing short stories you guys request (and no, this won't change update speeds).**

**Just pleaaaase don't harass me about when I'm going to update. Not saying that you shouldn't ask, but if you saw someone asked me a couple days ago and I answered, that means you shouldn't ask again.**

**Comments, criticisms, and concerns are very appreciated!**

**WIP**


	19. The Hidden Enemies

Levi stared at the empty space in front of him, his earlier yell echoing inside his head. His second-in-command had been standing right there a few seconds ago, and then had vanished right before his eyes.

_Vanished. __Disappeared. Lost. _

Because she was lost. Even if she came back, she was lost to him.

Mikasa sheathed her blades and plopped to the ground. She was standing in front of him, staring at the expanse that was Rose, so he couldn't see her expression, but he guessed she wasn't dealing with Sakura's disappearance any better than he was.

"You knew." He meant to ask it, give her the benefit of the doubt, but he couldn't resist keeping the accusation out of his voice.

"Yeah."

His leg flared in pain, but he resisted the urge to clutch it. He couldn't give in to the appearance of weakness, especially not in front of Ackerman's sister. Who knows if she was the enemy if Sakura Ackerman was related to her.

He heard the sound of gas propulsion, and in less than five seconds Hange was standing next to him. "A Wallist told us that we need to cover up the titan," she started, her voice devoid of her usual excitement. "You should go rest up before they crucify us. Mikasa, can you make sure he doesn't fall to his death?"

Mikasa turned around and nodded at her, her dark eyes betraying no sympathy. She grabbed him by the waist without permission and took off, taking him along for the ride. He didn't know whether to curse Mikasa for overstepping her bounds or Hange for allowing her to disrespect him like this, but maybe he was just too angry to notice they did nothing wrong.

As soon as they landed on the floor, he pushed Mikasa away, but his leg almost gave in because of the pain. He would definitely be out of commission for even longer because of his stunt. Yet another thing he could blame on Sakura Ackerman.

He couldn't even leave with his tail between his legs once Erwin approached him. To a person that didn't know him very well, Erwin looked calm and unperturbed by what happened, but after years by his side Levi could see the panic behind his eyes. Even Erwin didn't know how to get out of this one.

"We've been called for an emergency meeting. Your presence is required, Mikasa Ackerman. We hope you'll be able to clear some questions for us."

"I'll say everything I know," she responded, and Levi believed her, though his track record for whom to trust wasn't the most accurate.

The carriage they had previously used to hide a disguised Jean appeared guarded by four Military Police soldiers, one of them being Nile Dok. Nile was usually a calm soldier, but the battle and its aftermath had left him stressed, if the tautness of his muscles was of any indication.

Nile glared at him as soon as he saw Levi. "Get on the carriage. This time, we won't fall for another trap again."

Usually, Levi would retort sarcastically to demean Nile, but he knew right now wasn't the best time. Though they've hated each other ever since Levi was accepted in the Survey Corps, Levi understood that right now they were the bad guys. They had almost destroyed an entire district and had nothing to show for it. On top of that, one of their high-ranking members had revealed herself to have a connection to the enemy titan-shifters, adding to their tarnished image.

Damn her for leaving him with her mess.

The carriage ride was tense, with a strict silence no one dared to interrupt. He could guess Erwin was thinking of ways to get out of this one, considering he had never planned for Sakura to be... Well, whatever she was. She vanished in front of his eyes, she walked up walls... Injuries like the one that other Annie landed on her barely perturbed her.

She could do everything Annie could do, and maybe more. How much had she known? When he had confronted her even days ago about the nature of her abilities, she had vehemently denied being a titan-shifter. Now he believed her, but she was still _something _they had no knowledge of. And Annie was that _something _too, though he was unsure whether had known about Annie.

She wasn't wholly human, for sure.

The outlook didn't look good for Sakura, but he at least wanted to believe she hadn't betrayed them. It didn't make sense for her to be so emotionally invested with people inside the Walls. Her bloodlust towards Annie wasn't faked, either; she genuinely wanted to kill Annie. Someone had also set her up as the killer of Hange's titans, though the reason behind that was still unknown.

So, for now, he would withhold any judgements about her. Not only because it was the rational thing to do, but he honestly liked her, dammit. Sure, they got off on the wrong foot and they butt heads every other day, but she was a good soldier and genuinely cared about her teammates, and although the Survey Corps was full of those type of soldiers, having them live as long as Sakura did was so rare that it hurt.

It took around twenty minutes for them to reach the town hall. Compared to the rest of Stohess, the building was in a good condition, considering it was in a different section than the rest of the fight. There were two Military Police soldiers waiting for them outside, their rifles drawn and ready. Levi got out of the carriage first, and openly glared back at the grunts, who dared show them disrespect.

They must be seriously dense if they thought they could match up to his killing prowess. He had been killing people before they were even born.

Mikasa followed shortly, with Erwin trailing behind her, his face smooth and his eyes cool, with Nile bringing up the rear. Even with all the time they had spent together, sometimes he didn't know what Erwin was thinking. Levi knew Erwin always had a plan, but he was only privy to it if Erwin told him. He always trusted his judgement, but he would be lying to himself if he said he didn't have his doubts from time to time.

This was one of those times.

The soldiers escorted them to Stohess's municipal building, where the pigs got fatter and the asses got lazier. He had little love and respect for the merchants and bureaucrats who perpetuated the Underground culture by refusing them citizenship just so that they could get richer from the black market the Underground had. Nobody wanted to be an Underground rat, but they wouldn't let them leave unless under extraordinary circumstances like the one he and Isabel and Farlan had.

Even though the building signified a rotten community, the inside was clean and beautiful, with intricate stonework and artwork depicting the last hundred years of their history. There had been no surviving artifacts of a time before the Walls, or so they had been told. Levi didn't care much about history or culture, but if anything in the past had a clue on destroying the titans, he would be the first one reading everything about it. Even if it existed, the King would probably prohibit it.

Not that it would stop the Survey Corps. Their plight was above the rules of simple men and kings.

The soldiers stopped in front of two tall wooden doors and opened them in unison, revealing a room with four lit torches in the corners and a large, circular stone table surrounded by fifteen chairs, though there was an open space in the lower part of the circle. The District Chief, a man with a gaunt face and beady dark eyes, sat in the middle, exactly opposite to the opening of the table. He, along with the Military Police, co-ruled a certain district in terms of safety, representing the civilian half. The other thirteen chairs were occupied by all men, all of them old and terse, except for a young man with curly black hair and a smooth face. His appearance set him apart, but he seemed quite comfortable in his spot one seat to the left of the District Chief.

Nile left his position and sat in the empty chair to the right of the District Chief. The second he sat down, all the men in the table rose, including Nile.

Well, that was pointless.

"This meeting has been called as an emergency to what is going on in Stohess," the District Chief said in a raspy voice. "A representative from each of the Six Noble Houses and Six Merchant Families has been called to question and judge the offending party, the Survey Corps, on their actions today. General Zackly will not be joining us since he is too far away and we need to make haste. In his absence, we have Commander Nile Dok as replacement, with the same power and presence General Zackly would be given in this meeting. Does anyone have an objection to this?"

The room was completely silent.

"In that case, let us proceed. Commander Erwin Smith, please step forward," the Chief commanded.

The blond folded his arms behind him and stepped forward, his face held up high. "Yes, District Chief?"

"Please explain what happened today to the Emergency Board."

"The Survey Corps had sufficient evidence and reason to suspect that a Military Police soldier, named Annie Leonhard, was a Titan-shifter of similar, if not greater, danger than Eren Jaeger. We devised a plan to capture her."

"And this plan included destroying half of Stohess?"

"It was something we wished to avoid, but realistically knew it was going to happen."

"Why did you not ask us for help?" Nile asked, restraining his anger rather admirably.

Erwin shifted his head slightly towards him. "We also have reason to suspect that Annie Leonhard is not working alone, and all of the military is compromised at this point. You may not notice this, but I sent most of my new recruits to an undisclosed location for the very purpose of catching her by surprise."

"Who were the new recruits who helped in today's operation?"

"Eren Jaeger, Jean Kirschtein, Mikasa Ackerman, and Armin Arlert. We used Kirschtein to impersonate Jaeger, meanwhile the real Jaeger hid around Stohess with Ackerman and Arlert. We hoped to get Leonhard underneath a tunnel to prevent her from shifting, but she never went inside."

"Why not?" the District Chief asked.

"I'm not sure, but it can be safely assumed that she saw through our plan. The rest you all saw, with us trying to catch the Female Titan as she tried to escape the city. Jaeger then managed to contain her, but then something happened that I'm not exactly sure what it was."

Nile frowned, though he didn't look displeased at Erwin's recount of the events. "The other Annie Leonhard."

Erwin nodded, his face equally grim. "Correct. Not only was that a shock, but the incredible speed Leonhard possessed along with her ability to climb up Wall Sina without the help of her titan form... I still don't know what happened."

The other board members started whispering between them, and the District Chief's eyebrows furrowed. "Please, let us refrain from talk amongst ourselves until after the questioning," he said in a louder voice. He shook his head slightly and said in his soft, raspy voice, "Thank you, Commander, you may step back. Now, Captain Levi, would you step forward?"

Levi did as instructed, passing Erwin for a fraction of a second. He tried to read the blond's face to see if this was going in their favor or not, but as usual Erwin's face was stone.

"You're injured, Captain?" the Chief asked.

"Yeah, fighting the Female B–– Titan," he responded in what he hoped was a proper voice. Though he always had a tight hold of his emotions, sometimes his Underground mouth would let loose, especially when being questioned by those he disdained.

The men started whispering again, this time much more agitated. "I would wish to not remind again the members of the board to keep quiet," the Chief said again. He coughed slightly, the raspiness making them more violent, and cleared his throat before continuing, "Would you say Annie Leonhard is more dangerous than Eren Jaeger?"

"I haven't fought Eren in his titan form, but considering the Female Titan managed to beat Eren's titan form and capture him, I would say that she's more dangerous."

"And you let loose such a dangerous Titan-shifter in a civilian district?"

"She was already loose; you just didn't know it."

"How long have you known Sakura Ackerman?"

Levi blinked at that, slightly shocked. He was used to bureaucrats taking their sweet time and stalling for time, but it was a welcome change for him to go right to the point. He wasn't the only one who was caught by surprise. The youngest man in the table also looked shocked to hear her name. "Around two years."

"Was there anything about her that made her spectacular?"

She could sense titans, but that was a secret Erwin had zealously guarded within the Survey Corps. There were rumors, but there were also rumors Mike had been blessed by Wall Maria to sniff out titans and exterminate them. "She's an extremely talented titan-killer, the best I've worked with. That's why she's my second-in-command."

"Has there ever been something off about her?"

There were many things off about her, but he wasn't one to judge. All this time he had simply attributed all her weirdness to her past, but now he knew it ran deeper than that. "There's something off about everyone who joins the Survey Corps. She's a hothead and doesn't like authority, but other than that she never acted too weirdly except a foreign word or so."

"Foreign?"

Levi raised an eyebrow at that. He seriously had to ask that question? "She has pink hair and exotic facial features. It's not a big stretch that she's foreign. Asian, to be exact. She has retained a lot of her culture and heritage, but I never thought that was a reason to think of her as odd."

The District Chief nodded slowly, his face no longer as belligerent compared to when they went came inside. He was starting to see the predicament the Survey Corps and all of humanity was in. "Thank you, Captain Levi, you may step back. Now, Mikasa Ackerman, please step forward."

Levi slightly limped back and took his original spot Mikasa had left open. Mikasa was already facing the table, though they had all been relatively close enough to each other to see each other's expressions. Mikasa's face was calm, but her fists were clenched, her knuckles white from the exertion.

"You are Mikasa Ackerman, biological daughter of Erick and Mikoto Ackerman, biological sister of Sakura Ackerman, correct?"

Mikasa stretched her fingers slightly then clenched them again. She inhaled deeply, then sighed. "No, Sakura is my adopted sister."

The table started murmuring in confusion, and he couldn't blame them: he himself was just as confused and shocked. Erwin's eyes were also somewhat wide, as if he had never considered the option either. Sure, the sisters didn't look alike, but their personalities were so similar and their bond was so strong that it was easy to see past the physical. That, and they were both Asians, and there were so few of them that it was understandable if they were related.

So, maybe they're still related, just distantly. Still, this was new, and now he was _very _interested.

"Her records state that Erick and Mikoto Ackerman are her biological parents, however. Why is this?"

"My parents thought of her as blood, even if she wasn't related directly to us. They, like I did at that time, assumed she was from another Asian clan who lived inside the Walls."

"Then who is her family? Why not return her to her biological family?" Nile asked.

"We don't know. Sakura has amnesia, so she doesn't know who her biological family is."

Her story just kept on getting even more and more incredulous. Sakura had never mentioned having amnesia, ever, and almost never acted as if she had it. The few times she spoke of her past she mentioned it with such confidence and nostalgia that everyone took it at face value.

"Then how did you meet her?" the Chief asked.

"I met Sakura seven years ago. My mom said that one of my town's elders, Helsa, found her wounded in a forest and she could not speak a single German word. She only spoke Japanese, an Asian language, our language. My mom was excited because she thought there were more Asian people than we previously thought. So she brought her into our home and we started teaching her German.

"As we started teaching her more, we found out that she didn't remember absolutely anything from before she was found by Helsa. My mom was disappointed, but she was still happy to have found another Asian in her lifetime. One night Sakura came home drenched in blood and said that some bandits had killed Helsa and set their house on fire. So my parents offered our home as her home and she accepted.

"Grisha Jaeger, Eren's dad, came a few months later and my mom asked him to register Sakura as their biological daughter since she didn't remember her parents. Now I know that they just wanted her to have a normal chance at life since undocumented citizens can barely function in society. The rest is the same as the files."

Levi knew firsthand how hard it was to get a hold of papers when you didn't know who birthed you. He himself didn't know his own last name. At least someone out there had given Sakura a chance or else she would've landed in the underground. People without citizenship papers were easily found and send back to where they came from.

"Grisha Jaeger's falsification of official records will be a matter discussed later, if he's found," Nile said before anybody else could start clamoring and derailing the conversation. "So you don't know Sakura's origins, and you didn't know about Sakura's powers?"

"No, I didn't. She was always strong, and she knew a different form of fighting that she taught me, but she just said it was our heritage so I didn't think much of it."

"So how did you find out about her powers?" Nile continued.

"During the Fall of Shingashina, Eren's mom was eaten by a titan. She was somewhere else when this was happening, but when she arrived she punched the head of the titan so hard that it flew off meters away. Unfortunately it was too late for Eren's mom."

The people at the table started murmuring in disbelief, their eyes now expressing distrust. Mikasa's face was stony as ever, as if she had said the sky was blue or the Walls were tall, but even Levi had trouble believing Sakura possessed that sort of power. They were evenly matched with their record on spars, but all the times he won was because of his strength and all the times she won was because of her skill. If she had the power to punch things meters away he wouldn't be here right now.

He would be several feet underneath the earth and sporting no skin.

"She can punch a titan's head away?"

She nodded firmly. "Yes, I've seen it myself. She can also break the earth under our feet with a single punch."

"Is this all she can do?"

"No. She can heal wounds, control wind and water, can disappear and reappear somewhere else, and she's an extremely talented fighter. She said she can do more, but she doesn't remember how because of her amnesia. She says she is called a ninja, and that they specialize in stealth."

"Then how does she know what she does to begin with?" Nile asked, his voice surprisingly devoid of accusation.

Mikasa shrugged. "I'm not sure. She herself doesn't know why she remembers some things while others are still locked away."

"And she has avoided mentioning any of this to anyone?" the District Chief asked. "She has kept this secret ever since she lived with you?"

"Yes, and so did I."

"Keeping secrets from the royal family is a treason, young girl. Especially secrets of this magnitude. She can be just as, if not more, dangerous than Eren Jaeger!" the Chief exclaimed, and Levi's urge to punch him increased exponentially.

"The Military Police also has a pending investigation against Sakura Ackerman for destruction against military property," Nile pointed out with hard eyes.

Erwin stiffened. "We absolved Sakura of that blame. We suspected she was framed."

"An assumption that was made when we thought she was a normal soldier, but now that we know she has links to these titan-shifters it is no longer a good assumption, yes?"

"She has no links to the titan-shifters!" Mikasa's body was shaking in anger, her previous cool disposition blown completely off.

"How do you know?" Nile asked. He leaned in and placed his chin on top of his raised interlaced fingers. "Can you prove it to me that Sakura Ackerman has no links to these titan-shifters?"

"She may not be related to me, but I know Sakura loves me. She loves Eren, Armin, she loved her teammates, she loves her life, or as much as anyone can love it. These titan-shifters have no love for us. They have killed us, they never truly integrate with us."

Nile shook his head slowly and looked at Erwin. "Commander Smith, could you please tell everyone on the table your theory on how we have titan-shifters?"

"We believe they infiltrated us when Wall Maria fell and assimilated into our towns, then we believe they joined the military."

"We found Sakura two years before the Wall fell," Mikasa pointed out.

"The same person we found could walk up Wall Sina just a few hours ago," Nile retorted. "Someone like that could have easily infiltrated us before Wall Maria fell. You also mentioned she was there during the Fall of Shiganshina, and mentioned she didn't get there in time to save Eren Jaeger's mother because she was somewhere else, right? Who knows what she was doing between then? Maybe helping the destruction of Wall Maria?"

"She walked Grisha Jaeger to his boat," she explained, but her voce was getting weaker.

"A man we don't trust and who's on the run... Not the best person to provide an alibi," Nile said, leaning back and smirking at the black-haired girl. "It is not looking good for Sakura Ackerman. On top of the mounting evidence against her, she just left today, following Annie Leonhard. At first glance, she was running after her to capture her, but now it's not so clear. She could've used the confusion to run away with her and regroup."

"Annie killed her teammates, and you're saying she run off after her to join her?" Levi said. The whole table, even Erwin, looked at him in shock for speaking out of turn. He didn't care though, for once he didn't care. He just couldn't take them manipulating coincidences and events to fit their narrative and paranoia. "Even if she's the enemy, I know my teammate. I saw her grief. You can't tell me that's fake. Also, Annie tried to capture Sakura this last expedition. Just with that it destroys your little conspiracy that they're on the same side."

"You're telling me a girl who can break the earth can't fake a little emotion? And titan-shifters that infiltrated us can't pretend to be enemies to lull us into a false sense of security?" Nile replied with a frown. "I would've expected your thug instincts to be better, but it seems your survival is one big stroke of luck."

Levi grit his teeth and resisted the urge to snarl. His "thug" instincts hadn't gotten worse, they never would. He still needed to sort out his feelings regarding Sakura's lies about her identity, but he knew she wasn't the enemy.

He just knew.

The District Chief shook his head slowly. "It is my responsibility as District Chief to order the capture of Sakura Ackerman for crimes against humanity and the royal family. She will have a military trial that will try to find the truth about her ties with the titan-shifters and see her fate.

"The Emergency Board will tell General Zackly to continue funding the Survey Corps, even after this monumental failure that resulted in untold losses of human life and money, as long as you make it your priority to arrest Sakura and find these titan-shifters."

Nile abruptly stood up. "I also request that the Emergency Board to seek a sort of punishment of Mikasa Ackerman for acting as an accomplice to an enemy of humanity."

Erwin frowned heavily at him, his blue eyes disappointed. "If anyone in the Emergency Board can give me someone half as talented as Mikasa Ackerman, I'll consider not arguing with this. Commander Dok, why don't you replace her in our search for the titan-shifters?"

"I'm a Commander, not a foot soldier."

"That doesn't stop me from going after our enemies instead of turning against our own allies."

The men in the table started murmuring to each other in agreement. The District Chief noticed this, and waved Nile to sit down. "We gain nothing from handicapping ourselves, Commander Dok. Instead of looking to cripple to Survey Corps, why don't you start searching for links in your own military branch that may connect Annie Leonhard to outside sources?"

Nile gave the District Chief a side glare, but sat down slowly. "As the Emergency Board commands," he bit out.

Mikasa's tense shoulders relaxed slightly, but her eyes still showed the panic he found himself feeling.

The District Chief directed his eyes towards them, then regarded the members sitting on the table. "I call this meeting to an end. You're all dismissed."

All the members started shuffling out, mumbling between themselves, leaving the three Survey Corps soldiers standing in the room by themselves.

Levi wasn't exactly sure what to think. Oh, he was furious and oddly hurt, there was no doubt about that, but he didn't really know what to make about this whole situation. Officially, Sakura was their enemy and they needed to capture her to bring her to justice. She basically had the same status as Annie Leonhard in the eyes of humanity at this point. But that didn't feel right. She had given so much for their cause, and now they were just stabbing her in the back once she revealed who she truly was.

Then again, she had been lying to their faces this whole time.

_"I'm not a titan-shifter, and I can't prove it to you but you have to trust my word."_

All right, so she technically hadn't been a titan-shifter, but no technicality was going to save her from the hell that was coming her way.

"You need to tell us everything you didn't tell the Board, Mikasa," Erwin urged quietly. It had been almost ten minutes since all of the members had left, and room was quite sound proof, but Erwin never fucked around when it came to secrecy.

"I told the Board almost everything I knew. Sakura asked me to be truthful when it came to questioning."

Erwin nodded. "Good thing too. We wouldn't have been able to get you out of that trial Nile tried to put on you had the District Chief not appreciated your honesty. But, since you were very honest, I'll ask the questions. Sakura is not our enemy, correct?"

She nodded fervently. "There's no doubt about it. She has never hated anyone more than she hates Annie."

"Did she know Annie was a... what is the word she's called?"

"Ninja."

"_Ni__nja_," Erwin pronounced weirdly. "Did she know Annie was a ninja?"

"She knew there was something weird about Annie, but she didn't expect she was a ninja. She said that Annie could track her chakra, and that's what led her to their team during the expedition."

"Chakra?" Levi found himself asking.

"Sakura once described it as the result of moulding spiritual and physical energy together, but I don't really know what that means. She also said every living being has chakra within them. As a ninja, she can manipulate her chakra to perform feats we find impossible. This is how she can track titans, because they give off chakra."

Erwin muttered, "Well, that solves one mystery. And she can use this chakra to do the things you mentioned?"

"Yeah, but she's the only one who knows how to use it. She wanted to teach me and Eren once we found out, but she said she didn't know the reasons behind the things she did. She only did it based on instinct."

"So, the amnesia is real," Levi mentioned. "She really doesn't remember more than half of her life?"

"No, and I don't think she ever will."

Erwin shook his head. "It's far too early for those assumptions, Mikasa. There are certain troubling aspects surrounding Sakura, but I've realized three very concerning ones: if Sakura can't teach anyone how to manipulate this inner energy, how does Annie know? Manipulating chakra can be a natural born gift, but something tells me it has to be taught, and not just by any rookie. Someone taught them."

"So there's other ninjas around," Mikasa whispered.

He nodded grimly. "The second troubling aspect is that Annie is not be the only enemy who infiltrated, and there is the matter of the Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan. If the Female Titan is a ninja, it could be assumed those two are too, as well as everyone else who infiltrated."

"Which means that it'll be harder to catch them even if they don't become titans," Levi noted. "Our plan to draw them out might fail, then, which means everyone in that location is in immediate danger."

"Yes, unfortunately, but we can't back down now or we'll force their hand before we know how to deal with it."

"Sakura might be able to help," she noted in a hopeful voice. "She's much more powerful than all three of them combined."

"Which brings me to the third and most troubling aspect of this whole situation: Sakura. From what you've said, Mikasa, this chakra can be used to do some incredible physical feats, correct?" At Mikasa's nod, he continued, "You mentioned two parts to this chakra, a physical one and spiritual one. If such energies exist, then it is possible to affect a person 'spiritually', then. Which means someone could have 'spiritually' affected Sakura and erased her memories temporarily, only to bring them back at the most opportune time for the worse destruction."

"So a sleeper agent," Levi said much more calmly than he felt. "She thinks she's on our side, but she's actually an enemy. And she can turn into an extremely deadly enemy at any moment."

"And since someone knowledgeable had to teach the titan-shifters how to manipulate chakra, it's not a stretch to think they can do this at any moment."

"I'm not sure chakra can do such thing, Commander. I've never heard Sakura mention something like that."

"Her amnesia is suspicious and unnatural. It could've been called a coincidence before, but now we know there's no such thing."

"Then wouldn't it have been the most opportune time to return her memories during the expedition," Mikasa pointed out. "She could've easily gotten Eren and fled with her who knows where. Why now, when everything is more complicated than before?"

Erwin hummed in agreement. "Yes, those are good points. I don't completely believe all of the suspicions I presented ––that's why they're suspicions–– but it never hurts to be too cautious, especially when we're dealing with an enemy we know absolutely nothing about."

"Are you actually going to capture her, Commander?"

"Yes, that was our order; we can't go against a direct order, especially now that we're under extreme scrutiny."

She huffed. "There is no way anyone will be able to hold her captive. I wasn't exaggerating with the things she can do."

"What happens after we turn her in is none of our business," Erwin mentioned casually. "We have actual enemies of humanity to go after."

Mikasa actually smiled, the first show of happiness he'd ever seen in her, at Erwin's vote of confidence for Sakura. It was a bit uncharacteristic of him to trust a person that had so many question marks in their past, but if that person was as strong as Sakura, it would be beneficial to look over those smudges in favor of getting a powerful ally.

"We should probably go," Levi mentioned, noticing the rising moon from the single window in the room.

"Can I talk to you in private, Captain?" Mikasa asked, the word _Captain _said in the most sarcastic way possible.

Erwin shot Levi a sideways glance, a question behind his hard eyes. Levi scrunched his nose and only nodded, which made Erwin smirk in amusement. Bastard, he knew what was coming his way and he was just going to enjoy it.

Once the door was shut behind the blond Commander, she asked, "Is there a way we can save Sakura?"

Levi stared at her incredulously, for once taken aback. "We? Why do you want to get me into this?"

"Because you're her friend."

"Even if I was her friend, I wouldn't do such a stupid thing. Erwin just said he didn't care what happened after Sakura escaped. She can join us again for all she cares. There's no reason to save her."

"Yeah, and she'll be a fugitive unable to live a normal life after that. That's not a nice tradeoff after everything she did for us."

"You mean after all the years she lied to us?" To him?

Mikasa's eyes narrowed. "It was necessary for our safety. She only did what was best for us."

"_Us? Our _safety? I'm sure the Survey Corps isn't included in those words." He wasn't included in those words.

"She knew she was going to be taken away from us if everyone found out what she could do. That everyone was going to be afraid of her. And she was right."

"It would've been a very different story had she come clean from the beginning."

"How different, though? Wouldn't everyone try to kill her first, then asked her to try her most in the name of humanity? Sounds familiar, _Captain_?"

"We all make sacrifices for the Survey Corps. Eren isn't any different. Neither is Ackerman. The difference is that Eren wants to help. Ackerman is just selfish enough to not care."

He saw Mikasa's face getting angrier and angrier, her delicate control becoming undone. After the shit she had pulled with him, Levi felt a childish degree of satisfaction in how easily he grated on her nerves. "She gave two years of her life to the Survey Corps. She racked up an impressive record in two years. She lived through the pain of dead comrades and saved others. Sakura did just as much if not more than any other soldier, and what she did is not enough?"

Mikasa also easily grated on his nerves, he found.

"No, it's not enough. She could've done more, could've saved more, could've killed more. Two teams that died could be alive if only she hadn't been such a selfish... girl."

"No, you're being selfish in asking of her more than what she was willing to give."

"With power comes responsibility. You don't see me shying away from my duties just because I'm afraid. I understand why you're defending her ––she's still your sister, after all–– but you need to stop and realize that a lot of families lost loved ones because Ackerman didn't want to do anything about it. Wouldn't you be angry if you found out she could've stopped the murder of your parents if only she had been open about her powers?"

Mikasa snarled, "Don't dare... Don't you dare imply she didn't try to save them."

Levi raised an eyebrow. "Did she?"

Her face twisted, the anger in her eyes burning just like the anger in Sakura's green eyes, until her face smoothed. the transition eerie. "I see I am wasting my breath with you. If you want to see my sister burn, so be it. I'll just look for someone who genuinely wants to help her. I was stupid enough to think that person was one of the only people Sakura trusted her life with."

The last comment surprisingly stung him, but before he could reply, there was a knock on the door. Before either Mikasa or he could say anything, the door opened, revealing the young man in the Emergency Board. He only peeked his face inside and asked, "Can I come in?"

Mikasa responded first, her voice confused, "Yes?"

The man stepped inside and closed the door quietly behind him. He walked towards them and stopped until he was close enough to be seen in the dim torchlight. He was young, but there was something steely about his face that made Levi not underestimate him. He would've guessed he had the whole situation under control if not by the way he clenched a piece of paper.

"Hello, my name is Sebastian Burgeis, and I am a branch member of the Burgeis family in charge of representing the family in the Stohess district. I came here because of Sakura Ackerman."

Mikasa questioned, "Do you know my sister?"

"Yes, we've been acquainted for around two years now."

"She's never mentioned you."

He blinked. "Sakura hasn't told you about me? I guess she's shier than I thought," he muttered to himself. "Well, um, I am a musician, but I am an adopted Burgeis first, musician second, so I have to serve the main family by doing the paperwork. It is just such a coincidence that Sakura was brought up today, and an even bigger coincidence that I eavesdropped on your plans to help her, and the biggest coincidence that I want to help Sakura."

Mikasa's eyes narrowed. "You eavesdropped?"

"Not the best thing I've done, but you have to understand, the topic was Sakura. We're close friends. Here's the last letter I have that she wrote me. It'll prove that we're friends."

Sebastian meant to hand the letter to Mikasa, but Levi snatched it from his hands before she could even try to get it. He ignored her dirty look and started reading. The handwriting was hers, no doubt about it, and he knew exactly what events she was talking about.

_Surprisingly, the person who trusts Eren the most, besides me, is Captain Levi. Yeah, the guy who beat him to a pulp in front of everyone in the courtroom trusts Eren more than sunshine Petra. Sometimes, when I'm feeling overly sentimental, I swear he sees Eren as a human. He even told Eren that should he lose control of his power, we would try to keep him alive by cutting his limbs... Yeah, I know, that doesn't sound too trusting, but believe me it's better than killing him. He's still an asshole, but I have to admit that he has a few redeeming qualities, this being one of them._

Well, he's definitely sure she's a bitch, but she has redeeming qualities, so there's that.

Mikasa almost ripped the letter from his hands, interrupting him from the last couple of lines. He really wanted to know what she said next, but it would be extremely childish of him if he took it back from her.

But there was something suspicious about all of this.

"You keep this letter around every day?" Levi asked, not even bothering to keep the incredulity out of his voice.

"No, I got it from my room. I do carry it around with me every day, though."

"Why?"

"In case I get another letter from her, of course. It would be foolish of me to not remember her last words. This is the last letter she sent me."

Mikasa folded the letter and handed it back to Sebastian. "Sakura wouldn't disclose such things to a nobody. I trust him. But how exactly do you propose to help us? You said you're a branch member of the Burgeis. That's not even as powerful as a regular member of a Merchant Family."

"Lady Amina considers Sakura her best friend, and she is the heir to the Burgeis. As a Survey Corps member, though, she has to capture Sakura and bring her to justice. But I know what she'd like the Burgeis family to do if she knew about this."

"Which is?" Levi found himself asking.

"The military would never dare execute a noble, even a low-ranking one."

"She's been charged for committing crimes against the royal crown," Levi pointed out. "Not even a noble can get out of that one."

"If a noble is charged with high treason, the only way they can get a trial is if Noble House disowns them, therefore taking their title, which is what happens every single time. However, if Sakura adopts the Burgeis name, she automatically pledges allegiance to the crown, and she can't be tried because she would be a noble. Sounds easy, but it is almost social suicide for a noble to adopt a criminal, especially a high-profile one as her. The main family will probably want something out of her to make the risk worth it."

"I can't make agreements in Sakura's name," Mikasa said.

"And I can't make agreements in the Lord and Lady's name, but I can give you ideas. You wanted an idea, right?"

"I guess... But, it's extremely far-fetched. We're almost back to square one."

"Lady Amina is extremely tenacious. Give her some credit."

"Well, even if she manages that, there's always the part of Sakura accepting the deal. She's not very––"

The door opened abruptly, and the pink-haired woman they had been speaking about appeared before their very eyes, sans 3DMG. She was out of breath, her eyes wild, and for the longest time nobody spoke, Sakura too tired and the rest too shocked to even blink.

"We have to go. Titans have been sighted inside Wall Rose."

* * *

><p>Sakura had been following Annie for two hours now, playing an infuriating game of cat and mouse. To make it worse, it was already night time and they were in one of the forests inside Wall Rose, making it even harder to find her and keep up with her. She had to grudgingly admit that Annie was better well-trained than what she initially thought her to be.<p>

But Sakura was better.

She saw a person flicker in the foliage, and Sakura grinned at how closer her prey was getting. Unlike Annie, Sakura had a full set of 3DMG, and was ready to fight her whether she was a titan or a ninja. Annie would definitely shift if they engaged in battle, but if Sakura landed a one-hit kill, there would be no fight.

Sure, she was interesting in knowing who taught Annie how to use ninja skills, but Sakura had an inkling Annie would rather die than tell her. But that's fine; Sakura knew she would find these people and kill them for the terror they helped breed inside the Walls.

Annie led her outside the forest, and the intense sunlight made Sakura narrow her eyes. Now why would she do that? Prey always had the advantage in closed areas. In the open field, anyone could land a killing hit.

Sakura drew her swords and body-flickered farther than what she had followed Annie in, giving her the advantage of surprise. Sakura saw Annie's eyes widen from the corner of her eye _––got you, bitch––_ but she dodged her attack just in time, and put a safer distance in between them.

She growled in frustration. "Why do you keep running away, Annie! Fight me!" Sakura repeated the earlier strategy, but Annie avoided her attack again, just like Sakura had expected. "Fight me!"

Annie continued running away, faster than before, to south west Wall Rose, west of Trost, not even looking back to see if Sakura was following her.

Now that was weird. Sakura had blown her cover, and she had expected a full on fight with the Female Titan. That's why Annie had gone into the open, right? Then why was she still running away? There was no way Sakura was going to have backup. This was the most vulnerable Annie would find Sakura.

That's when she felt it.

That's when she felt the awful chakra of a titan, not even five kilometers away from them. Usually, she couldn't detect them from so far away, but their chakra was like a beacon. Was this how easily she had been found in the 57th Expedition? Was she the reason why her team got found out, then?

No, that's not the worst part. Wall Rose didn't end for at least another forty kilometers. The titans had gone past Wall Rose again, just like they did with Shinganshina. The first time a Wall fell, the effects were catastrophic, and it almost ended life as they know it. A second time? They would lose all of their agricultural power, since Wall Sina was mostly the seat of commerce.

"You did this?" Sakura demanded to Annie, who was a couple hundred feet ahead of her and gaining more distance. "You have destroyed our lives! Again! Do you not care at all?"

No response.

Sakura was furious, yes, but, even more than furious, she was terrified. Now that Wall Rose had fallen, what of humanity? What of her? Did they need to live in constant terror of titans? Should she run away and find the truth behind the titan-shifters? What of Eren and Mikasa and Armin and Amina and Levi and Sebastian and the Survey Corps? What would happen to them?

And one of the reasons for her terror was running away from her, getting closer to the source of the titans.

No, there was no way she was going to let them win. Maybe something can be done the faster they react. She was fast, faster than a horse, and she was closer to Stohess than any messenger situated at the breach.

Sakura created a shadow clone, splitting her chakra in two to provide the clone. She frowned at how little chakra she had left. There was no way she would be able to fight Annie for longer than five minutes now.

The clone appeared in white smoke, running at her same speed.

"Go warn the Survey Corps about the breach," she ordered. "Make it quick; we don't have time."

Her clone nodded grimly and disappeared in a poof.

Annie wasn't running away, she was _leading_ her to the source of the titans, which seemed convenient, but Sakura knew was a trap. There had to be a reason why that area was being attacked. She had underestimated titans for far enough, and now she knew better than just assume there were coincidences.

But why would they? What was there that the titans were interested in attacking? People? No, too easy. Resources? Maybe, but she couldn't really see titans trying to destroy their resources that way when they had done that just by breaching the wall. Was it linked to the Survey Corps? Could be; they were the only real threats to the titan-shifters. It wasn't Eren, or else they would be heading to Stohess along with Annie. So, it was something else.

What else would titan-shifters want near there?

Annie sped up, and so did Sakura. Why did she seem so anxious to get there? Was there something important to her in the place the titans were heading?

No, not _something_… _someone_. Erwin had told the higher-ups of the Survey Corps that the rest of the rookies had been sent to an undisclosed location, since he didn't know who else was involved with the titan-shifters. The Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan where in this undisclosed location, and it would make sense to go join with them to…. Well, to go back home. Now that humanity was destroyed, they could probably go back to wherever they came from and reminisce about all the good lives they killed.

And she wanted to lead Sakura there so they could take her along the ride, just as she had planned in the 57th Expedition.

Sakura may feel like a blood-thirsty demon, but she wasn't stupid enough to get captured. Maybe she should turn back and hide? Killing stealthily and avoid being killed was the way of ninjas, right? Plus, she was running low on chakra after creating that clone.

No, her teammates were about to get around twenty titans coming their way, and all of this was a surprise attack, so they would be defenseless. Defenseless and no chakra. What was the point of her power if everyone died because she didn't use it?

Plus, her secret was out. There was no reason to let people die anyway.

Annie diverted from her path, running to south Wall Rose. Why would she lead her here and then leave? This was Annie's best chance to capture her! Unless this was part of the trap, to lull her into a false sense of security and then attack her when her defenses were down. No, for that to work Annie would have to be relatively close and be a surprise presence.

So, what game was she playing?

Annie continued running south, and Sakura could run diagonally to catch up with her quickly, going with the original plan. Or, she could continue on her way to the titans and whatever surprises laid there.

She wanted to say that the choice between her teammates' lives and her revenge was easy, but she genuinely didn't know what she wanted to do. She should save lives, that was what she should do and what her healing skills were meant to do, but she really wanted to get Annie back for what she had done. She didn't sleep because the deaths of her teammates haunted her dreams. She couldn't look at the sunset because the colors reminded her of Petra's hair. She couldn't find enjoyment in food because she could only think about how much Gunther would like or despise what they ate. She found herself thinking of witty insults for Oluo for a split second, only to realize that he was no longer around to joke around with. She still found herself daydreaming of Eld's wedding, and what things she would do for her own wedding, if she ever found someone who could deal with her.

But they were dead. They had been brutally killed by a fifteen-year-old titan-shifter without any remorse. In five minutes she had erased four futures from this world. And for that she would hate Annie for the rest of her life. Sakura didn't care why Annie did it. Annie could have done it to save the world, she could be made a saint, but Sakura would still feel her heart sing for her blood.

Annie got farther away, but Sakura continued to the titans location.

The world was for the living; the dead would have to be content with being ghosts of their pasts.

Sakura tried to hurry up to the source of the titans. Three. All of them deviant. She frowned. Just three? Three measly titans were all that was needed to make goosebumps appear in her skin? Since when did three titans feel like twenty? Not only that, but three were more than enough for the Survey Corps to take on.

A conical stone tower came up in the distance, as tall as a ten meter titan. Behind the tower was a rather large house, probably a sort of ranch. As she got closer, the titan chakra started becoming overwhelming. Titans usually had a bigger presence in her mind because they stood out from normal human chakra, but these titans were really something else. She could barely feel for any humans as much as she tried to search for it.

Was she too late?

The titans chakra acted like a beacon she was all too glad to follow. She thought they would be extremely easy kills, since titans do not function at night, but much to her surprise they were all awake and moving around. She tested their response to her presence and sure enough they tried to eat her, though it was child's play to get away from them.

Even though they were awake, all of them were still too slow for her ninja-enhanced 3DMG. Now that she didn't have to worry about people finding out her secret, she used her body-flicker to her heart's desire, using titans for momentum and her 3DMG for direction. If she kept practicing, she would definitely find a way to beat Annie.

Now that the titans were gone, though, the entire place was empty. No signs of human or titan chakra anywhere nearby.

Maybe they escaped?

She walked by the steaming carcasses of the titans, trying to find any clues as to where her team left. There were fresh hoof prints in the ground leading to different directions. One of them left in the same direction she came from, but they definitely missed each other. The other three hoof marks led north, southeast, and west. They probably split in teams to spread the word about the breach. It wouldn't get to Erwin any faster than she did, though. Horses were simply not as fast as chakra-enhanced ninja who could run for days.

So they were alive when they had escaped, and were probably still traveling. She couldn't be sure they were still alive because of the traitors in their midst and also the new influx of titans, but at least they had escaped alive. Should she send another clone to report this or was it overkill? Her chakra reserves were alarmingly low after running for like four hours now. Maybe she could rest inside this house and try to find out what happened tom––

The grass ahead of her was soaked in blood. She jogged towards it and crouched, trying to find any indication of the person's identity. Scout, by the half of the Wings of Freedom she found. There were fingers and an arm scattered about, blood no longer oozing from the appendages. This person had been eaten brutally by multiple titans, probably the three she just killed. The blood stains were fresh, so this had to have been not too long ago. She could quickly search the titans' carcasses for more clues about the deceased. She hated not being able to know who...

Short blond hairs. Everywhere. She knew this shade of blond. It was darker than Erwin and Nanaba's... And she had seen it in...

Mike.

Mike was dead? How was Mike dead? He was the strongest only second to Levi. His titan kill was extremely impressive, and his ability to sense titans always put him a step above the rest in terms of surprise.

Had he been devoured by the three titans she killed? Maybe... Stupid deaths were not unheard of in the Survey Corps, especially those in their third or fourth expedition who thought they knew everything and got eaten for the dumbest reasons.

But they had been far too easy kills for a veteran like Mike, who had been in the Survey Corps for more than five years.

There was more to Mike's death, but there was no way she would ever find out.

Her gut clenched in fear. There was something wrong about this whole situation. This wasn't even about the breach anymore. There was something that she didn't know about, that Mike probably knew and that's why he was killed.

Wall Rose had been breached, and there were more than just titans coming in.

* * *

><p><strong>And with that we begin the <em>Clash of Titans <em>arc that immediately follows the _Female Titan _arc. Levi gets a more prominent role in this chapter simply because he's surrounded by all of the action. I think I'll give it to Sakura in the next chapter to make it more even.**

**For those of you who don't know, I have started a Tumblr-exclusive story called _Rosette, _which is an alternate timeline of what would have happened in Sakura had landed in the underground instead of with the Ackermans. I will update _Rosette _this week now that _The Vessel _is out.**

**As for updates, college is extremely overwhelming so I'll have to resort to updating over breaks. I expect another update for this story soon, since the two year anniversary of _The Vessel _is approaching. Two years later and this story has received so much love and excitement that never in a million years I could've expected. **

**Thank you so much for your favorites and your follows and your reviews. Even if I don't reply to them, I read them all and they all make me so so so happy. You've got no idea. They make writing this story worth it knowing how much all of you guys like it.**

**So thank you, from the bottom of my heart thank you.**


	20. In the Darkness

_3 hours after Annie's Escape_

Levi couldn't help but stare at the pink-haired soldier as she explained to Nile Dok who she was for the third time.

"I'm not Sakura," she said in a very patient tone. If this were the real Sakura, she would barely control her Eren Rage. "I am a clone of Sakura sent to warn you of the titan sighting. She's somewhere else."

"Which has been confirmed by Thomas," Erwin added, his face just as patient as the clone's. "Now, Nile, we don't have time to lose so would you please just sign off on us taking the clone?"

They were still in the room where Sebastian and Mikasa had planned to save Sakura from the political cliff she had been thrown off from. The only difference was that now Erwin and Nile had replaced their presence, with Sebastian having escaped rather quickly before a military official saw him bargaining for a traitor's life and Mikasa sent away to prepare herself and her friends for their upcoming journey, but not before summoning both Erwin and Nile.

Erwin had come first and had asked the clone to explain herself fully, but just before she could delve into the finer details, Nile had shown up, hell bent in sending the clone to jail.

"I can't allow you to leave with a soldier we claimed to be a traitor not even an hour ago," Nile retorted, annoyed. "Why do you even want her so badly?"

"Just because I'm a clone doesn't mean I can't help. I possess all of my creator's abilities, and will help out as long as my chakra allows me. That's what Sakura would've wanted."

"Sakura Ackerman is labeled a traitor right now," Nile told the clone. Levi had to admit it was weird talking about Sakura like that when her mirror image was right in front of them, but he could see himself getting used to it. "We don't believe your intentions, either. For all we know, you could just be here for recon."

"All right, _Commander _Dok," Levi began sarcastically, then gave him a hard look, "if you're not going to allow us to take her, then why don't you offer yourself and some of your soldiers? It won't really match up the entirety of this clone's worth, but it'll do nicely."

"Levi," Erwin warned.

He glared at his Commander. "I understand that it's in our best interests to not offend him, but titans have been sighted inside Wall Rose. For all we know we may not come back to civilization." He turned towards Nile again, his face a bit smoother. "So, like I said, either put in your men or let us take her."

It didn't take Nile very long. He looked at Clone Sakura and growled, "Fine." He whipped his head at Erwin and pointed a finger towards her. "But if she does anything don't come crying back to Wall Sina. This also does not revoke her traitor status." He tramped towards the door, but stopped when he was next to Erwin. "I sincerely hope you haven't doomed humanity any more with this decision," he whispered before leaving the room.

As soon as the door closed, Clone Sakura said, "So Sakura is labeled a traitor?"

"Yes," Erwin replied without any remorse. "Your creator didn't leave us much of a choice. It was either accepting those terms or being defunded. Now, you were in the process of explaining your existence?"

"Sakura created me when she split up her chakra into two. I possess all of her abilities and knowledge, and when I'm dismissed I give her back all of the things I learned, though I don't think she's aware of this ability of the Shadow Clone Technique."

"If you're aware of it then how isn't she aware?" Levi asked.

"Because all clones know their purpose, even if their creator doesn't. I'll disappear once the chakra that powers me goes out or if I'm wounded heavily. Whatever chakra I have left and all the intelligence I gathered goes back to her."

"Is that the only way you can go back to her?"

Sakura shook her head at the blond commander. "I can be dismissed. If you want me to relay any information to Sakura, just ask me to dismiss myself and I will."

"You'll take orders from Erwin?"

"And you, too. Sakura may not know it, but she's still is a Survey Corps soldiers, and she still takes orders from the Squad Leaders. When are we leaving, Commander?"

Erwin's blue eyes hardened and he looked out the door. "As soon as we get. We're getting everyone ready right now. The goal is to leave within the hour. I just hoped everyone had some time to rest, or else we'll be at a disadvantage." Erwin turned his gaze at Levi's leg. "It's a shame that you're still wounded."

"I can heal him," Clone Sakura said. "It shouldn't take long, and I don't think I'll use enough chakra to disappear."

"What do you need?" Levi asked before Erwin could protest. It had been torture not being able to fight in Stohess and equally as embarrassing to be carried down the Wall by Mikasa. Now that there were titans inside Wall Rose, he could tip the scale for at least a little bit, even if it's to buy everyone some time.

"A bed and a chair."

"Let's go."

Almost at the door, almost at the door.

"Levi."

He inwardly groaned and begrudgingly turned away from his sweet escape. "What?"

"Is that wise?"

"Erwin, I just told Nile we had the odds against us and we needed every person we could. Now I have an opportunity to join that fight and I'll take it."

Clone Sakura, sensing that the apprehension was about where her loyalties lied, declared calmly, "Commander Erwin, I know now isn't the best time for me to claim things, but he's my Captain, and it's my duty to not let harm come upon him. And if I can do anything to reverse any harm, I will."

Both Levi and Erwin raised their eyebrows at that comment. The Sakura they had known would never say anything like what the Clone had just easily declared. Either she was an excellent liar or the Clone had perfect loyalty instilled in her. "I like you better than your creator," Levi mentioned.

Clone Sakura smiled at him. "I haven't said anything that my creator wouldn't agree with."

Erwin sighed, and Levi could see him resisting the urge to kick him. "Fine, but make it quick. You're leaving soon, remember."

Levi didn't need any further encouragement. He bolted out the room as fast as his limp could take him and headed to the hospital wing. The military building in Stohess took care of all military matters, including caring for the wounded and the sick. It was around here that Eren was recovering from his fight with Annie, and it was in this wing that he would finally be able to walk normally.

He opened the first room he saw and thanked whatever gods existed that it was empty. Clone Sakura closed the door behind her, turned the lamplight on, and moved the one chair in the room next to the bed.

"Please remove your boots and roll up your pants in the wounded leg," she ordered, but it didn't come off as commanding as all of Sakura's orders did.

Levi did as told and also took off his 3DMG, placing it gently on the floor. He got on the bed and as soon as he laid down, Clone Sakura got to work over the wounded area, a cool green light appearing around her hands.

Whatever she was doing felt great. His right ankle felt warm but he could almost feel the pain lessening by the second. His awe at her abilities only increased, and so did his anger at Sakura. She had always possessed this wonderful power and she had hid it from them? Had hid it from him? He knew why she had done it, but it didn't make him hurt any less.

"The stunt you pulled on top of Wall Sina worsened it," Clone Sakura commented. "That was unwise, Captain."

Levi observed the pink-haired soldier working diligently on his ankle. Her features were exactly the same as his second-in-command, but there was something distinctly off. If he were a guessing man, he'd had to guess it had to do with her eyes. Her green eyes were devoid of fire.

He liked fire.

"If you were Ackerman, you'd be berating me at this moment. Yet here you are, healing me without any qualms or complaints."

"I'm created to follow orders. Clones don't have independence."

"So that's all you're useful for?" Levi asked, some of his anger at Sakura seeping into his voice.

Clone Sakura sighed sadly. "I understand that you're angry, Captain, but I'm not the person you can have this conversation with. I can't give you the same answers she would give you."

"But you can relay my disappointment, yes?"

"I'll make sure it's very clear, Captain."

"You can try to be feistier. You don't have to agree with everything I say."

"Not designed to be combative against allies, Captain."

Levi had to hold in his snarl of frustration. He thought he was going to get a chance to get out all of his anger quicker than he thought, but there was no way he could yell at the woman currently healing his ankle without feeling like an absolute piece of shit. The person he was angry with wasn't her, even if every definition said she was a clone of the origin of all of his anger.

He'd have to let his anger simmer and harden until he crossed paths with Sakura once again.

"I do have a question, Captain."

Finally! Some hope of personality starting to shine through!

After the Clone did not venture any further, Levi realized she was asking for his permission to ask a question. Oh dear, this was definitely not his second-in-command. "Well, what is it?"

"Why did you trust me?"

"Trust you? I don't trust you."

"Yet I'm healing your leg."

"You said it yourself: you would never harm me."

"That could've been a lie."

"I'm good at detecting lies."

"Not my creator's. She lied to you for a long time."

Levi narrowed his eyes, annoyed at the reminder of her betrayal. "You're not really building a case for yourself, Clone."

"Which is why I'm curious as to why you didn't dismiss or attack me immediately. Commander Dok is right: I am a liability. At least until my creator can prove her innocence in a trial, she is branded a traitor. So why do you trust me?"

"Because your creator is a shitty, selfish person, but I don't think she's a traitor. Which doesn't make you an enemy."

Clone Sakura smiled rather ironically and the green glow disappeared from her hands. "It does seem it's that way, yes. Anyway, I've finished healing your ankle. You had a minor fracture, but I carefully reconstructed the bone."

Levi experimentally twisted her ankle, surprised to find that his pain was completely gone and his previous mobility was restored. Those healing powers of hers were miraculous, to say the least. Just what was her limit?

"Bone injuries are a bit different than flesh injuries since they require more follow up care. I strongly recommend that you abstain from fighting because" ––Clone Sakura shot him a stern look very reminiscent of his second-in-command when he was about to interrupt her–– "the wound is still fragile. I sped up the process, but your body has to finish healing. If you were to break it again, I wouldn't be able to heal it since I've used the majority of my chakra here. You can, however, walk and run normally, though I recommend resting as much as you can."

Levi sat back up and put his boots on, content that the simple action no longer bothered him like before. Even if the clone had informed him that his wound hadn't finished healing, he felt much more comfortable. He experimented walking around the empty hardwood floor room and was even more delighted to realize that his limp was gone.

Clone Sakura got up from her chair and stretched her arms. "I take it you like it," she said without turning to look at him.

"This power of yours is a game-changer. Just how many people can Ackerman save?"

"Sakura."

"Excuse me?"

"Her name is Sakura." The clone turned to look at him; her green eyes were serious.

"I know that."

"Then use it."

Levi furrowed his brow, unable to keep the confusion out of his eyes. "I don't understand why that's important."

"It creates distance between superior and subordinate. That's what the Training Corps did and said to us. You never did that with the squad except for Sakura."

"You do remember she has a severe problem with authority, yes?" At least that was the reason he told almost everyone who asked.

Clone Sakura nodded. "She does, but that doesn't matter anymore. Not since they died. The number of people she cares about dwindles every year, and you're one of the only constants left. I think my creator would be happy to know you see her as a comrade."

"It would have been easier if she hadn't lied to me for two years," Levi muttered under his breath. "Anyway, why are you telling me all of this? Did she send you to also confess all of her feelings to everyone?"

He had hoped to embarrass Clone Sakura enough that she purposely ended the conversation, but her features were as smooth as always, neither caught off guard nor daunted about his comment. "No, I'm just using my time to improve my creator's relationships with as many people as I can. She's taciturn when it comes to her emotions, and since I'll cease to exist in a few hours, days at the most, I won't have to take responsibilities for my actions."

Like creator like creation.

"All right all right, fine, I'll call her Sakura. But the comrade part she has to earn by not being so shitty anymore."

"Thank you."

Levi looked out the single window in the room, observing the destroyed city with detachment. Soon every human city would look like this, or worse. If they had found a way to breach Wall Rose, nothing would stop them from doing the same with Wall Sina. He was unsure if Erwin or Zackly had formulated plans for fixing the breach or controlling the fallout.

Perhaps it would've been easier to die years ago.

He turned away from the window and looked at the pink-haired soldier. Her back was straight and her face was giving him her full attention. "Clone, I'm assigning you to my team for the rest of the night so you can give me follow-up care. Go prepare yourself if you need to and meet us at the gate promptly at midnight."

"As you wish, Captain Levi."

She saluted and left the room without a word. A part of him had hoped she gathered more information about her post, haggled with him about her responsibilities, complained a bit about how little time he gave her to get ready, but no, she accepted his word as law.

She was the perfect picture of the obedient soldier he always wanted Sakura to be, but he only found himself hating it more every second he spent with her.

Levi spent the next thirty minutes planning their trip. His body was on autopilot, but his mind was still whirling to catch up with all of the events that had transpired in just six hours. It's not an exaggeration to say his whole life had been flipped upside down, and he still wasn't sure how he was taking it. He still trusted Sakura, that much was true, though whatever good partnership they had before had been destroyed and had to be rebuilt. Annie disappearing and having similar powers to Sakura's was extremely concerning, since now he wasn't sure how, evenly matched they were. It turned out there were titans inside the wall, and nobody had any idea how they'd gotten there.

He didn't even want to think about the breach in Wall Rose. Again, he was hoping either Erwin or Hange came up with something.

"Levi!"

Speak of the devil and she shall appear.

He turned away from the cart he had finished preparing and regarded Hange with serious eyes. Trailing behind her was a Wall Priest, those crazy ones that always found a way to interfere with military matters. His face was pale and he had prominent wrinkles and frail features, but his light brown eyes were calm.

"I wanted to introduce one of our traveling companions to you. Levi, this is Pastor Nick; Pastor Nick, this is Captain Levi."

They only stared at each other, their faces stony.

Hange barked a short laugh and clapped them both in the back. "I'm glad you're getting along so far! Levi, I was telling Pastor Nick I hoped he would be more open with you about the origins of the Wall."

"You mean you still haven't found out about that titan inside the wall?" Meanwhile Erwin and he were getting grilled by the Emergency Board, Hange had spent the majority of the afternoon trying to get information out of a Pastor. To find out she had failed was surprising, considering how tenacious she was.

Hange clapped Pastor Nick again, though much more forcefully. Nick remained quiet. "Nope, our friend here is very, very stubborn. Hasn't really said much besides asking us to cover the titan and ordering us to be secretive about the matter."

Levi resisted the urge to growl. Too many things piling on top of his plate, too little time to take care of them. Hange was right to seek him out though; there weren't many who could resist Levi's own brand of information-gathering, though he was unsure if he was allowed to use more violent methods on the priest. Plus keeping tabs on the priest would occupy his time and would not interfere with his healing bone, something Clone Sakura would definitely approve of.

Before any of them could add anything to the conversation, the kids from Shiganshina and the pink-haired soldier reported for duty. The three rookies were bright-eyed and jittery, even Eren, who was suffering from the after-effects of the titan transformation. The clone looked a bit worse for wear, no doubt exhausted from healing him. According to the clone, whenever her fuel, her _chakra_, runs outs, she'll disappear forever. Now that he thought about it, he felt guilty he had hastened her "death," but the clone had seemed very content in healing him, so the least he could do was follow her recommendation to stay out of the fight for a little bit longer.

The blond boy, Armin, saluted him first. The other three followed with varying degrees of enthusiasm. "We're reporting for duty, Captain Levi."

Levi looked around and noticed most Survey Corps members were ready to depart. His mission was to lead a small team get to the Hermiha district to assess the situation and plan accordingly. His provisional squad consisting of Eren, Mikasa, and Armin, at least officially, to help deal with the problem, meanwhile the other squad members strictly belonged to Hange.

"Good, you're here on time. Get onboard; we're leaving."

Mikasa helped Eren get on board and together they sat on the left bench, with Armin following shortly after leaving the adults to sit on the right one.

Levi got on first with Clone Sakura's aid, followed by Nick, bringing Hange to the leftmost spot. As soon as Hange finished getting on, she ordered their small squad to start on their way to the Hermiha District to whatever waited for them there.

The first half an hour was spend in silence. Nick refused to make eye contact with either of them, whether it was because he was intimidated or detached, Levi didn't know. Clone Sakura was having trouble staying awake, with her head lolling back and forth with the movement of the cart. It wouldn't be long before she fell asleep.

Eren seemed to be in a similar situation, no doubt the after effects of his titan transformation. Mikasa was looking over both Eren and Clone Sakura, even though he knew she was aware she was simply a clone. Her personality, like her older _adopted _sister's, gravitated towards overprotection. Whether Sakura had instilled that on Mikasa or simply nurtured it, Levi didn't know, but it was this overbearingness that almost got Mikasa killed.

He'd be damned if he didn't admit he admired that sense of duty. Not many had the strength to protect those they loved, and the ones they did were just obsessed with getting more power.

The blond boy, Armin, was also silent, but Levi could see that he was lost in thought. Levi hadn't heard much about Armin except from what Erwin briefed him earlier before Nile came to interrupt their discussion with Clone Sakura. He was not as physically endowed as Mikasa and Eren, but what he lacked in brawn he made up in brain.

"What can we do now?" the blond boy finally said in a despondent voice. "If Wall Rose has actually been breached, it won't matter if we deliver him to the front lines... Everything we know... And why do we have a Wall Priest with us?"

Hange cheerily explained what Nick's purpose was, as well as his annoying reticence about the origins of the titans inside the walls. Once she revealed that particular tidbit, Eren woke up from his stupor and grabbed the Wall Priest by his collar, his eyes showing a more subdued version of Eren Rage, as he had dubbed it.

"What the hell!" he yelled at the Wall Priest.

Levi noticed from the corner of his eye that Clone Sakura snapped awake, momentarily confused of her surroundings. Just then Eren grunted in pain and both Mikasa and Clone Sakura lowered him gently back to the chair. She placed a hand against Eren's forehead and it glowed green, visibly alleviating the young soldier's pain, then sat down next to Levi.

She looked even more tired.

"What in the world?" Nick finally mumbled.

Hange laughed harshly. "You get to keep your secrets, then so will we," she announced. "But Eren, I wouldn't jump straight to violence. Pastor Nick wants to see the conditions people are living in right now to see if it's worth it to spill his secret."

"I still don't get it," Eren said much more calmly. "What could be worth so much as to not prevent the total extinction of humanity?"

"I won't be the first one to jump to his defense, but Pastor Nick seems more upstanding than your average citizen. I... I think he believes there's a cause more important than preventing humanity's downfall."

The three teenagers' eyes widened at that, then their foreheads burrowed. They were probably thinking the same question as he was: what could possibly be more important than humanity's survival?

Levi motioned at the gas tanks currently resting in the front of the cart. "I may be out of commission for a little longer, but I still have the tools to make people talk. And if all else fails and he proves to be a liability, I'm still strong enough to make people disappear."

His open threat did not do much to affect Nick's facial expression, but Levi could see the tension in his body. He could also see Hange playing with what looked like a rock.

"I didn't know you were weird enough to also play with rocks, Hange," he mentioned.

Hange whipped her head at him and smiled widely. "This isn't a rock! I secretly salvaged it after the first failed captured in the 57th Expedition from the Female's Titan crystallized skin."

"It hasn't disappeared?" Armin asked excitedly.

Her smile became an open grin at the enthusiasm of the blond rookie. "No! No evaporating, no disappearing, no nothing! Incredible! I had no idea what to do with it besides study its composition until a few hours ago when the titans were revealed inside the walls. Turns out, it's almost a perfect match! Meaning that the titans inside the walls probably crystallized to become its supporting pillars."

"Does that mean that–– Mph!" Armin began enthusiastically only to be shut up by Hange's hand on top of his mouth.

"Nuh uh! Allow me the honor, Armin! We can't have a repeat of Trost, right? There's no boulder big enough to close the breach in Wall Maria. But, if Eren could use his titan-hardening ability, would we be able to close the breach?"

"Plug the hole... with my body?" Eren whispered.

Hange clenched her hand harder against the rock. "It's something I've been mulling over, wondering if it's a possibility."

Hange's idea was grand, but it depended on a lot of variables. First, did Eren even have the power to harden his body? So far, they had only seen that power in the Female Titan. Second, would his body be big enough to close the breach? Levi had forgotten the size of the wall, but it had to be big enough to let all of those fifteen meter tall titans in. Third, how where they going to get there without huge casualties?

"I think it's worth a shot," Armin said carefully. "The repeatability of the procedure is also alluring, since Eren would be able to harden his body multiple times. The earlier plan to conquer Wall Maria was to take raw materials to the wall, which requires a lot of staff to build it and solders' lives to establish supply points along the way. This approach could take at least twenty years.

If the need for carts is eliminated, we could make a beeline for Shinganshina. With Eren, twenty years becomes a day."

Levi couldn't help but think of the last six years he had spent in the Survey Corps, five of those dedicated to the supply chain Armin was talking about. So many deaths, so much pain, so much hard work, all to gain a couple hundred meters of ground to get closer to their destination. And now all of that work would just be undone by one teenage boy who could plug the wall with one titan body.

Hange placed her fingers against her mouth, pensive. "With a small enough group, we could get there in no time."

"How about we do it at night?"

"At night?" Hange asked.

"Titans can't move at night! Sure, torchlight at night doesn't illuminate as much as daylight, but even with slowed speeds a small group can make it to Wall Maria before dawn."

She looked at the crystallized titan skin in her hand, a worried look on her face. "We're desperate, but there still seems to be hope."

"Yes, well, this all rests on the gamble that Eren can harden his skin to plug the wall." Armin turned to look at the black-haired boy with questioning eyes, who seemed as if he wanted to be invisible at this moment.

Hange laughed lightly. "Even if we asked, I don't think we would receive an answer." She sobered up slightly and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "But do you think you can do it?"

Eren huffed shakily. "Y-Yeah."

Before Levi could remind him that he didn't have much of a choice, Clone Sakura quipped, "I'm sure you will be able to. So far, everything you've done has been based on instinct, right? So, maybe this will also be with the help of your instinct."

The boy looked visibly calmer after her words of encouragement. Even if she wasn't the original Sakura, she had some of her qualities that extended past physical appearance.

"Yeah you're––"

The pink-haired soldier gasped in what appeared to be pain. Levi looked around to see if there were any wounds but Clone Sakura looked perfectly healthy. Was she disappearing?

"Sakura!" Mikasa yelled out. "What's wrong?"

Clone Sakura looked down at her hands in worry. "Nothing is wrong with me, but something's wrong with Sakura. I can feel when she's in pain, and right now she is."

"Do you know what kind of pain?" Levi asked, trying to keep the panic from his voice. Had Sakura engaged with Annie? Was she losing the fight?

She shook her head. "It's internal... I don't know how to describe it. It seems to have subsided."

"Is she alive?" Hange asked.

"If she dies, I'll disappear immediately. She's fine now, it's no use to worry."

Even if Clone Sakura tried her best to assuage their worries, nobody in the cart was buying it. Something was wrong, and they were heading in that direction right now.

* * *

><p><em>Sakura shivered against the bitter cold as they got closer to the heart of the Land of Spring. When Itachi had mentioned going on a small trip, she never considered he would take her closer and closer to the Land of Spring, which was the Land of Snow at this time. Hence the current storm they were currently traveling in.<em>

_She sneezed violently, attracting the attention of the black-haired Uchiha. "I believe we can afford a little break," he mentioned, his voice louder than usual to beat the howling wind._

_Sakura sniffled and glared at him. "I've been saying that for the last hour!"_

_Itachi ignored her comment and started looking around the place, hoping to find a refuge. Unfortunately visibility wasn't high, forcing them to walk further. By now Sakura lost all feeling in her face, and she was secretly grateful Itachi had recommended to dress warmly or else she would be freezing in the snow due to hypothermia._

_After twenty more minutes of silently trudging through the snow, they found a stone cave a bit further down the path. Itachi body-flickered close to it, and Sakura followed hot at his heels, eager to get some shelter from the bitter winds._

_Sakura got both of their sleeping bags from the seal scroll and laid them on the ground meanwhile Itachi made a fire out with wood he had stored on a separate seal. He had been a bit more well-prepared for the winter than Sakura was. _

_They sat on the hard, cold ground and got some ramen from the sealing scroll to heat over the fire with a pan she brought. Sakura placed her hands close to the fire, eager for them to gain some heat. Ninja seldom wore warming gloves since they slowed down their seal-making speed. Especially for Itachi and Sakura who specialized in ninjutsu, every second counted in the fight. Sakura had more taijutsu experience than her black-haired companion, but she noticed her punches didn't channel as much chakra while wearing non-ninja gloves._

_This made traveling in the cold more annoying, since their hands had to be free. She could wear gloves like Kakashi did, but those didn't really help much in the cold._

_"So, what can you tell me about the wolves?" Sakura asked after she got a cup of ramen for Itachi and then herself. Itachi wasn't much of a talker. Considering his rather disturbed past, Sakura was surprised he was even willing to indulge Konoha citizens in conversation. If she had been forced by her village to kill of her family, she would've deflected and hated said village forever. But here he was, training her out of a sense of misplaced guilt._

_She was still a bit unnerved in being around his presence. Every ninja has a couple of screws loose, but Itachi probably has little screws left to begin with._

_Itachi raised his eyes from the burning fire to meet her gaze and took the bowl. He seemed amused, if Sakura could even say Itachi could be amused. "Didn't you ask around the village?"_

_"I did, but not many people knew about them. Considering having a summoning contract is hard and not inheritable by blood, I can understand that. It's hard to keep around, and ninja would rather focus on improving their skills than hunting the world for a summoning contract." _

_The only clan in Konoha that could claim to have a "family summon" was the Sarutobi family, and even then the monkeys were very picky about which Sarutobi could summon them. The Sandaime had been akin to a god, so the monkeys lent their service happily. Asuma, though, hadn't been so lucky in gaining their respect. Right now, no ninja had access to summon monkeys, which has caused some unrest in the Sarutobi clan._

_"Correct," he replied, pleased with her deduction. He delicately slurped on his noodles, his clan royalty status showing in making ramen seem a food for nobles. "And, on most days, I would agree. But you know why summons are important, especially when you're outnumbered. But to answer your question, the wolves are an elusive bunch, so I would've been surprised if someone in Konoha knew. Though they're not affiliated with one particular village, they will usually meet candidates in the Land of Snow or in the Land of Water. They're particularly coveted in the Land of Water for being an Ice Release summon."_

_"Ice Release?" she asked after gulping the last of her food. She set her bowl down, wanting to free her hands._

_"The cursed Yuki clan may have fallen out of the graces of the Land of Water civilians, but the Hidden Mist greatly appreciates that summon, at least until they can find more Yuki clan members to recruit."_

_"How am I supposed to compete with Kiri's prized summon? Would the wolves even consider a Konoha ninja?"_

_"They're not affiliated with villages, only talent and a certain personality. And you are the Godaime's apprentice and a formidable ninjutsu user. Don't sell __yourself short, Sakura."_

_"Still, it sounds as if I'm going to be rejected outright. I'm not even sixteen. I don't have an extensive resume of kills or achievements." What had started out as a conversation to kill time was now killing her nerves. There's no way she could compete for a contract an entire village vied over._

_To make things worse, Itachi was overly quiet. He finished __eating his food and set his bowl on top of Sakura's, carefully avoiding eye contact._

_"You agree with me?"_

_"No, not really," he replied nonchalantly._

_Sakura's suspicion rose. "How did you even get them interested in me?" she wondered out loud. "I had Tsunade-shishou's recommendation to get the slug contract, but you haven't even signed with the wolves. So how did you get them interested in someone who's just known for whom her master is?"_

_"You wouldn't be very happy with me if I told you."_

_"I'm not happy with you right now so it won't make a difference," she replied sharply._

_He actually _smiled_! The nerve of that man! "You will truly be terrible when you grow up."_

_"Itachi," she growled, not even bothering with honorifics._

_He raised his hands in a placating manner, then lowered them slowly. "I told them of your origins."_

_"You told them what?"_

_"Your family origins."_

_"That was supposed to be a secret between my family and the village," she said tightly, trying to control the overwhelming feeling of betrayal rising in her heart. "We had an agreement!"  
><em>

_"And Konoha respects that. Tsunade-sama respected that agreement as a Hokage, but as your __shishou, she expressed interest in having you learn Ice Release from the wolves. So when the negotiation with the first wolf failed for them to meet you, the second meeting was much more optimistic. They will still test your talent, of course, and there exists the likely chance that your bloodline isn't pure enough for this kekkei genkai, but if the wolves are willing to try so will I."_

_Sakura still felt incredibly hurt and angry, at both Itachi and her __shishou, but her emotions had to wait. She needed to find out more information about this breach of intelligence and do some damage control. "Who told you this?"_

_"I didn't snoop around your family origins, if that's what you're implying. Suguru told me, willingly, actually."_

_"__Suguru... told you?" Her brother, her uptight, gifted brother, had freely given information that could've put her family in danger? Why would he ever do that? He was an asshole, but he would never do something like that._

_"During our ANBU years, Suguru and I were in the same team. We had siblings of around the same age, both lauded as geniuses, same temperament and interests, so it was a matter of time before we became friends. He once confided in me his disappointment that his primary affinity wasn't also water so he could use his birthright, and the rest is history."_

_"So all this time while you were a __missing-nin–"_

_"He hunted me quite relentlessly for all these years, no doubt to silence me." Well that explains why Suguru almost never came around again. First ANBU, next hunting an S-Class __missing-nin? "I never told anyone, of course; my allegiance always lied with Konoha. Even if I had wanted to, nobody in Akatsuki is interested in obtaining kekkei genkai."_

_Sakura had never really put much emphasis in her family's origins. They had told her once she had graduated from the Academy why her extended family wasn't around like most families. Her father, Kizashi, came from the Land of Snow to escape the regime that had been installed during the Third Shinobi War. Her mother, Mebuki, came from the Land of Water and had deflected closer to the end of the war. Both had ties to the Yuki clan, and apparently her grandmother from her mother's side and a cousin from her dad's side had been prominent Ice Release users, but they themselves did not inherit the bloodline._

_They had made a deal with Konoha to hide those Yuki ties in exchange for pledging their allegiance to the new village. Paranoia was healthy in the shinobi world, and they retired from the forces to lead civilian lives. They confessed __being relieved that Suguru wouldn't be able to learn Ice Release because he didn't have water affinity, and though they were worried their daughter might've inherited the kekkei genkai, nobody in Konoha would be able to teach her._

_In the end, knowing her family origins had always been more for heritage than actual ninja-related reasons. She wasn't the daughter of the Yondaime and one of the last Uzumaki in the planet. She wasn't a member of one of the most feared clans in the world. She was just Haruno Sakura. Her parents' native homelands did make her name interesting, though._

_Meeting Haku had been interesting. She had been awed at the jutsu he was able to perform, and had been __saddened to find out he had been killed. But being recognized could've been deadly for her parents, especially since Haku could've actually done something about them, so she didn't mention absolutely anything._

_But now things had changed. If the wolves expressed interest in her, she would not only gain another contract, but she would also learn Ice Release from them, if it was possible. She had been learning Water Release and Wind Release from both Itachi and Suguru, respectively, so she had some rather powerful jutsu under her belt. The rest was in her genetics._

_"You seem less mad than what I expected."_

_"Finding out you and my brother were friends was shocking."_

_"Were... Yes, that's a good word to describe it. We haven't really talked yet."_

_"Did taking me as an apprentice have anything to do with rekindling that friendship?"_

_Itachi frowned slightly. "I would be lying if I said that hadn't crossed my mind, but I also genuinely felt guilty about Sasuke."_

_"Suguru is indebted towards you. We all are, actually. My brother is too stubborn to seek you out, but if you do he'll have nowhere to run. And if he tries just tell him that I'll kick his ass with exploding ice spears, that'll stop him."_

_He chuckled lowly. "I see you're __already adding Ice Release to your arsenal. Are you hopeful?"_

_Sakura shifted and opted to look at the fireplace. "I know my parents left their home countries to escape persecution and I'm just about to embrace the very reason why they were persecuted, but I'm excited. This is something unique to me. In Team 7, it was aways the jinchuuriki, the Uchiha, and the girl with pink hair. In fights it was always Rasengan, Chidori, or Shanaro, which was a battlecry I used when I was younger. I know I'm training to be a medic, but we're not taught anything flashy and most medics are there because they have good chakra control, not because they have some special or clan jutsu..." She looked up after trailing off and blushed. "I must sound horrible and selfish and––"_

_Itachi raised a single hand. "Please, Sakura, you're talking to a man who killed his family." Sakura flinched and averted his gaze. "You're not horrible or selfish for wanting to be powerful. They're human emotions. Just don't forget why you're __training to get this power."_

_She looked back at him, her green eyes determined. "Sasuke."_

_"__Konoha," Itachi amended lightly, though he seemed grateful his brother was such a high priority for her. "Well, we should probably go to sleep. You'll be meeting the wolves tomorrow."_

_"Where are we meeting them?"_

_"I'll show you tomorrow. How about I take the first watch?"_

_Sakura nodded, grateful. Being so close to the source of heat had reminded her how tired she was. After she cleaned the dishes, she bid Itachi a good night and sank deep into her sleeping bag, the warmth enveloping her like a cocoon and sleep coming to seal the delicious deal._

_In her mind it felt like five minutes when something wet touched her forehead. She scrunched up her nose and moaned in protest when something licked her._

Something licked her_._

_She shot up, almost tripping on her sleeping bag, and pointed a sharp kunai at a rather weird-looking large snow white wolf. She looked around for Itachi, but was worried when she couldn't feel his chakra presence._

_"He went back," the wolf explained in a deep voice. There was something off about his appearance, but at the same time it was rather similar. "Before you wonder, no, he didn't betray you. This was just a part of our terms."_

_"You're here because of the summoning contract."_

_The weird-looking wolf sat down, revealing a rather muscular torso. Though its hind legs's paws were normal for a quadruped, its front legs' paws had opposable thumbs reminiscent of Kurama. or at least what she had seen of Kurama. "I'm here to––"_

_"Are you related to the kitsune?" she blurted out, then clamped her mouth shut._

_The wolf's icy blue eyes turned even icier. "Don't mention those wily fire freaks around our presence." They did look similar, though! She just had to ask. That explains why they were capable of using Ice Release. Animals without opposable thumbs could not perform ninjutsu. "__Anyway, I'm here to take you to our home, Kamiki Woods. We will judge your worthiness there."_

_"How are we getting there?" She knew that she couldn't be reverse summoned there because she didn't have a contract with them. When she had gone to the Shikkotsu Forest, Tsunade had taken her there._

_The wolf extended his right front paw (hand?). "I'll take you there, Haruno Sakura. Ah, yes, I'm called Baku, the Seventh One." _

_"Seventh One?"_

_Baku sighed and gestured at his right paw. "We will explain pack dynamics if you're inducted to the pack. Now, take my paw."_

_Sakura did, trying to mask her apprehension and succeeding rather admirably. The feeling of being transported could only be described as weird. She wasn't moving at high speeds like she did in her body-flicker. Instead she felt as she was being compressed then expanded, but not painfully._

_Once the feeling was over she realized she was standing on soft grass. There were some scattered trees here and there, but for the most part Kamiki Woods was devoid of trees. The shrubs were rather small and the ground was scattered with snow, but the giant snow-capped mountains in the distance were awe-inspiring and beautiful. She was surprised anything could grow in this bitter cold._

_"Welcome to Kamiki Woods," Baku said with pride. We'll take you to meet our leader as soon as the second applicant comes."_

_"Second applicant?"_

_"We keep these matters confidential, but now that you're here in Kamiki Woods, I'm allowed to tell you. We don't test potential summoners individually. Our summoning contract places emphasis on pack structure, and that requires cooperation amongst members. In a pack, you either fail or succeed together, so for our applicants, you either fail or succeed together."_

_"What if it's an enemy ninja?" Sakura asked. Itachi probably hadn't known this was going to happen. If there is another enemy ninja around, she __will refuse to learn Ice Release or even mention that she could learn it. What a waste of time._

_Baku shook his head. "Bah! Your politics don't concern us. As long as you're in Kamiki you will be fine. If the other ninja attacks you, we will immediately banish them. If you attack the other ninja, we banish you, simple as that."_

_"Does that mean the defending ninja also gets kicked out?"_

_"We don't banish you; we fail you. You can try again at a later time."_

_"Even if I didn't do anything wrong? Even if I was attacked?"_

_"Packs have arguments all the time. Sometimes we fight between us. But we never go with the aim to kill or pack members. If you can't have a cordial relationship with your partner, it will never work out. If you can't even look at each other without fighting, it won't work out."_

_"How many people have passed this test?"_

_"Not many, maybe six in the last ten years," Baku admitted, amused. "We don't place limits on the number of people that can have our contract. But we don't make our test easy. And ninja don't really know how to work together, especially if they're from different villages."_

_Great, she was definitely getting a ninja from another village unless Itachi pulls one out of his ass and reveals he is also vying for that sweet wolf contract._

_A puff of smoke appeared a couple of feet away, revealing a wolf __similar looking to Baku along with a tall, black haired man. Though he wore a Kiri headband, his dark eye was amicable. The terrifying part was that half of his face was deformed, as if wrinkled. Interestingly, he wore an eyepatch over his left eye, even though that side of his face was smooth as butter, at least compared to his right side._

_Who the hell was he?_

_"Hello, I'm Tomi, nice to meet––"_

* * *

><p><span><strong><em>YOU BASTARD!<em>**

* * *

><p><em>5 hours after Annie's Escape<em>

Before even waking up Sakura felt her entire body burning up. Not only was the heat uncomfortable, but she felt as if a foreign body was invading her. Sakura shot up from the bed, the sensation too perturbing to remain asleep. Much to her surprise, her body wasn't sweating, so it wasn't a fever. Instead her chakra felt oversaturated and hot, as if someone was pumping burning chakra into her.

Sakura growled and looked around the dark room, but she was alone and nothing in the room would help alleviate her chakra pain. She tried to channel chakra to her hand like she had done numerous times before, but instead of the cool green healing chakra appearing uniformly throughout her hands, angry red chakra burst through. uncontrolled. She yelped in pain and immediately stopped channeling chakra in her palms, but now she had nasty burns that actually hurt her body.

Why would her chakra hurt her? Was this because she had pushed herself too much yesterday?

No, she had pushed herself before, almost reaching chakra exhaustion, but the next day nothing like this had happened. There was something seriously wrong with her. It seemed that sleep was a catalyst for all the weird body changes she's had. She woke up in that forest with the ability to perform healing chakra. That chakra rhombus that sat on top of her left breast appeared literally overnight. Now her chakra control was haywire and a foreign chakra was trying to hurt her.

And the feeling that she was dreaming something _very _important just serves to remind her she has no idea who she is and what her purpose in this world is. True, right now she felt she had to protect her precious people above all costs, but her whole person was a mystery to everyone and herself. There was something very wrong, but with nothing but intuition to guide this feeling, she would just be running around in circles.

As far as she was concerned, using chakra was out, unless she wanted to burn herself alive. Sakura stomped her foot and yelled in frustration into the silent night. Out of all the times for her chakra to go haywire, it _had _to be while she was pursuing a group of ninja titan-shifters by herself. Oh, she was still a damned good titan-killer, but the field was uneven now if the Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan chose to engage her in a ninja fight. Even if they fought in their titan forms, she was still at a very distinct disadvantage unless she fought with a talented group.

Sakura put on yesterday's uniform, pointedly trying to ignore the smell, then assembled her 3DMG. After pursuing a ninja for almost five hours, she couldn't ignore that her body wouldn't smell so great. That might actually attract titans or ninjas with very good senses of smell, and right now she had to remain stealthy.

She took an oil lamp and left one of the many bedrooms in the destroyed house. Whoever had lived here had good taste in furniture; sad that the fight had left it in such a bad shape.

She rummaged the house for food, water, and gas for her tanks, pleased to find the Survey Corps soldiers left plenty for her. She frowned, sniffed her uniform, then scrunched her nose. Yeah, that wouldn't fly by her standards. She found the women's wing and took two pairs of shirts and pants. One pair she put on, the light green shirt replacing her trademark white shirt, and the other pair she stored in the bag. She took a rather big Survey Corps jacket and an even bigger Survey Corps cloak. Though the clothes reinforced how small she was, she enjoyed how free her limbs felt. Maybe she should ask for bigger uniforms in the future.

An envelope fell from her old jacket and Sakura almost hit herself for her stupidity. The envelope was addressed to her and the handwriting was Petra's. She still clearly remembered the day she received this letter, the embarrassing day she had displayed her full grief in front of Levi. Petra's dad had said these were her last words, but Sakura didn't have the heart to read it just yet. A part of her felt her greatest weakness was found in the words etched in the paper inside the envelope. If she read them she would only open the gates to the intense grief she still kept at bay.

But she'd be damned if she forgot such an important letter out here. She unbuttoned her shirt and squeezed the letter inside her chest bindings. There was no safe place to carry belongings in their uniforms considering the impressive pirouettes they made, but her chest bindings constricted enough that even a letter would not slip out. Sure, it'll get sweaty and gross, but at least she won't lose it.

There were only two horses left in the stable. One whinnied as soon as it saw her, and that's the one she chose. It was a rather young mare with a beautiful black coat reminiscent of Isabel's, Levi's horse. Though she and Levi had never really gotten along, Haruto and Isabel were best pals. The veterinarian had even recommended to breed them soon, since they would produce powerful young. Levi had staunchly refused, which had been weirdly cute to witness, especially when he listed his reasons at the rather confused vet. There weren't really any good reasons why not except for Levi being attached to Isabel and not wanting to go on a mission without her.

She admitted to herself his loyalty to his horse had been cute.

Sakura grabbed a nearby torch and mounted the mare, currently nameless, and set them after the trail of hoof prints on the ground. The prints would no doubt lead her to where the Survey Corps members were, though she didn't know how well she could follow the trail in the dark. She was content with the three hours of sleep, knowing it wasn't safe for her to travel in the daylight, but the tracks weren't as visible from atop a horse's back.

The Survey Corps members were smart enough to split up, probably to gather more intel about the titan appearances. Unfortunately for Sakura, she didn't have the time to follow all of the trails, so she chose the one heading south, and hoped that the trail would remain fresh enough to see in the torch-illuminated. This would've been easier in the morning, with daylight, and a full night's rest.

But there was no other time for her to follow the trail. Knowing Erwin, he would want to leave Wall Sina as soon as news of this got through. If the Wall Sina task force got to wherever the rookies where before her, there would be no way she could successfully flush out the ninja titan-shifters. She wasn't sure to what extent her revelation had affected their perception of her loyalty, but she had a feeling neither Erwin nor Levi would just let her do as she wished right now.

She truly hoped they would be able to understand with time. She was willing to work very hard to prove her loyalty, but that was only possible if given a chance. Erwin would come around sooner or later once he realized what a huge asset she was, but Levi was pickier. He didn't have to work with her if he didn't want to, and Erwin couldn't force him either.

If Mikasa had followed her orders, both Levi and Erwin knew what her powers entailed, and they would no doubt think about all the times she could've changed the tide of battle. They wouldn't understand how uninterested she was in helping their cause while at the same time go through the impossible to keep the people she loved safe. And there was no excuse for that, Sakura knew that, but she wanted at least another chance to prove herself.

This time around, she would use all of her strength to achieve the Survey Corps's goals, not only hers.

Makimi (she would've been a fool to not name her horse this) trotted in the night, never complaining about the random stops Sakura made to make sure they were still on the right path. If only she could use chakra to enhance her eyesight, she wouldn't be wasting so much time in something so easy. The torch didn't have a high illuminating radius.

But the more she traveled, the clearer the hoof prints got. Judging by the freshness, the Survey Corps members weren't going full speed, understandably so to avoid drawing the titans' attentions. Luckily for her, she could still feel the presence of titans, and her sensing radius was clear as it ever could be. She increased Makimi's trot to a gallop, confident she could afford this speed.

The night started getting less cloudy, allowing the moon to illuminate the path ahead. Sakura noticed that the hoof prints she was following met with even more hoof prints, then headed a bit north. She frowned slightly in confusion then looked up from the path to see what could've made them change their course, only to find a castle bathed in moonlight.

"I think we found them," Sakura told Makimi and caressed her side. "Just a little bit more, girl."

Sakura went at full speed towards the castle, eager to finally see people. She tied Makimi in the stable with the other horses, and her excitement grew, because this confirmed the Survey Corps members were here.

The castle was more brick than castle, considering it was partly destroyed. She could feel the soldiers' chakra presences quite clearly now, but she was in no rush now to find them. In her excitement, she had forgotten to think of a good reason to have followed them all the way to this place. Luckily, considering her titan sensing abilities, she found an excuse quite easily.

She opened the door in one of the towers and headed inside. She heard the chatter of the soldiers, unaware of her presence, and she decided for their sakes to change that. "Hello?"

The conversation immediately died down. She continued walking towards the light and heard two sets of footsteps coming her way.

"Sakura?" Nanaba exclaimed in surprise.

Gelgar appeared shortly after. "What are you doing?" he asked, devoid of any suspicion. Unlike Nanaba, Sakura had been in the same squad as Gelgar for a while, back when she was in Erwin's personal team. That will come in handy now.

"Can I talk to you two outside?"

They looked at each other for a moment and nodded. Another soldier with light brown hair ran out of the main room. Nanaba turned towards him and said, "We'll step out for a little bit, Henning? Watch over the rookies."

Henning saluted and headed back. Sakura noticed that whatever conversation had been going on before her arrival was now dead.

The three Survey Corps soldiers went outside. The night was dark, but her torchlight helped with that. She set her torch in a nearby torch holder and turned towards the two soldiers.

"What are you doing here?" Nanaba asked before Sakura could say anything. "What happened in Wall Sina?"

"I don't know. Erwin sent me to you guys to see if I could use my powers to detect the titan-shifters," Sakura lied. She felt bad about doing this with her teammates, but there was no way they would accept her otherwise, especially with the winds of treachery blowing so hard. "Captain Levi's leg was better the day of the operation so my presence wasn't required. But the place where you guys were supposed to be was infested with titans."

"Yes, titans have been sighted inside Wall Rose," Nanaba said. "My team and I tried to find a possible breach but we couldn't find any."

"Same with us," Gelgar continued. "Though we stopped in Ragako, a village north from here, and were surprised to find titans in there, though one was so deformed it couldn't even get up."

"So how did it get there?" Sakura asked.

Gelgar frowned. "Exactly. We don't know either. And the town had absolutely no clues as to how that happened. Anyway, my team didn't find any possible breaches as well. So if there's any breach in Wall Rose, it wasn't from this side."

"Even though the titans were sighted by you first."

"And Ragako. Though the village had no survivors."

So even the Survey Corps soldiers were uncertain how the titans had gotten inside. Without a breach anywhere nearby, how could've they gotten from the north Rose to south Rose, if a breach did exist? They would've been sighted a long time ago.

"You mentioned going to the original spot, right?" Nanaba continued, interrupting her thoughts. "Have you seen Mike?"

Sakura cringed. "Mike is dead."

"What!" both of them exclaimed at the same time.

"How is that possible?" Gelgar asked. "He was one of the best we ever had. He couldn't have been beaten by those titans."

"I would usually agree, but I found a patch of grass with limbs and blond hair. I assumed it was him because his hair is darker than yours, Nanaba, and now that I hear that you don't know where he is, it just confirmed what I thought."

Nanaba grimaced and looked down. "I still can't believe it," she whispered shakily.

Gelgar, though still upset about the news, didn't look heartbroken like Nanaba did. "And how did you find us so quickly?"

"I followed the trail," she admitted. "I guess it was a lucky break I followed a simple one that took me almost immediately here."

"You followed mine, then," Nanaba said, her voice slightly better. "Well, I can't say I'm happy with the news you bring, but I'm happy you're here. A titan sensor will do us well in these uncertain times."

"Yes, I'll most definitely help you out. I'll also need your help."

"What do you need?" Gelgar asked, his eyes determined.

"I'm going to lie to the rookies and tell them that Annie was captured and is currently being interrogated for names," she said. "It'll be hard, because nobody knew that we suspected her of being a titan-shifter, but I need you to be in the lookout for suspicious reactions."

"I thought you could sense titan-shifters," Nanaba mentioned.

"That's what Erwin and I thought but in all this time I've been standing here, I don't feel anything out of the ordinary."

Gelgar nodded in understanding. "So you want to flush them out."

"Yeah, and if they don't really say anything interesting, I'll stick around and see what kind of information I can gather. Are all the suspicious rookies in this castle?"

"No," Gelgar said. "We're missing a girl, Sasha Brauss. We're unsure if she's alive."

"So there's five out of six rookies here. Well, those are better odds than what I thought. If the initial plan fails, I'll just introduce myself to them and mingle. It'll give me a better glance of their personalities and hopefully I'll be able to see if they're suspicious."

"So far, none of them have been suspicious. They've followed orders and seem just as shocked about everything that's going on as us," Nanaba said rather bitterly.

Sakura would share her same negativity if she weren't a ninja. Even if she can't use her chakra, she has very keen observational skills. The only problem with her plan is that the titan-shifters most definitely knew she was a ninja meanwhile she didn't. That put her in a certain disadvantage, but she was dealing with fifteen-year-old kids. Something will eventually slip up.

"We'll just have to hope we get a lucky break, then," Sakura said grimly. "Well, are you guys ready?"

Both of them nodded and the three veterans headed back to where the rookies and the other soldiers were. The young soldiers were silently sitting, simply gazing at the fireplace that sat in the middle of the room, but their attention was immediately drawn towards the pink-haired member of their army.

Sakura straightened her back and observed each of them. She recognized a couple of faces, but they were all strangers to her. There were two girls, one of them a pretty blonde with bright blue eyes and the other a tall brunette with freckles and dark, suspicious eyes. The rest of the rookies were guys. The blond was quite built and almost looked like an adult from his facial features. The brunet was taller than all of them by a large margin and had dark features. The shortest one of the bunch was a bald kid who looked worse for wear.

"My name is Sakura Ackerman." Her last name immediately made them all stiffen. "Yes, I'm Mikasa Ackerman's sister. I'm here to let you know that the Female Titan has been captured and her identity as Annie Leonhard has been revealed."

All of the rookies let out a shocked yell. The titan-shifters were quite good at playing innocent, she had to hand it to them.

"Annie was the Female Titan?" the bald kid remarked. "But why? How?"

"We're currently trying to find out those questions," Sakura explained. "We're hoping she'll give out the names of her comrades soon enough."

"Comrades?" the blonde girl asked.

Sakura smirked menacingly. "Why, the Armored Titan and the Colossal Titan, of course. Once she reveals the names, you will all be cleared of suspicion." At that, all of the soldiers in the room were quiet, even the rookies. In fact, they seemed a bit hurt. "You must've realized a long time ago why you're here. Don't take it the wrong way, though. Commander Erwin doesn't take chances, and this will not negatively impact any of you. In fact, we have little reason to doubt all of you, considering you gave it your all during the 57th Expedition."

"So what are you doing here?" the brunette with the suspicious eyes asked.

Sakura looked at Nanaba and Gelgar, silently asking if they had seen anything that warranted an arrest, but they both shook their heads dejectedly. So her plan had failed, but she had never expected it to work to begin with. If it did, then her opponents weren't even worthy of rivaling her strength.

"I'm here to get to know all of you better," Sakura admitted. "The faster I can lay Commander Erwin's doubts to rest, the faster we can deal with this titan problem."

"You don't really us to confide in you," the brunette continued. "How can we be ourselves when you're looking for reasons to suspect us?"

"I'm an optimist." A lie, but they didn't need to know that. "I'd like to believe that none of you helped Annie Leonhard in decimating our squad. You're all kids in my eyes, my sisters age, and though I won't see you're naive, I want to believe you're innocent." Sakura looked straight at the brunette girl, who still looked suspicious. Sakura wasn't the best speaker, after all. "What's your name?"

"Ymir," she answered.

"What about you?" she asked the blonde girl sitting next to her.

"Krista," the girl answered a bit meekly.

Sakura just looked at the blond boy. "Reiner."

"Bertholdt," the dark-haired one said.

"Connie."

Sakura nodded at each of them. "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you all. We've all had quite the day, so we'll end today and start again tomorrow. Good night."

None of the rookies said anything back. Not that she expected them to; she had cracked down hard on them after all. The brunette, Ymir, had given her a hard time but considering the hard time she was going to give them tomorrow there was nothing to worry about.

She went up the stairs into the roof, content to be under the clouded night sky. She hadn't gotten much sleep, but there was no way she could sleep safely around two potential ninjas. And they were good ones, because they had masked their chakra to normal civilian levels even before she got there. They must be doing it unconsciously by now, something she should've done a long time ago.

Sakura just would've never assumed there were more ninjas inside the walls, but jokes on her for never expecting the unexpected.

Now that she was alone, she felt bad she had so blatantly lied to everyone, and was a bit alarmed at the ease she did it with. Was she so used to lying that it had become second nature to her? Besides Mikasa and possibly Eren, was there anyone in the Survey Corps who actually knew who she was, not who she claimed to be?

Instead of moping around, she should plan her strategy to follow Annie. The trail was very cold by now, but she had a feeling either the Armored Titan or the Colossal Titan would lead her to Annie eventually. The problem was time. The Survey Corps would no doubt ground her for a while because of the blatant lying she did. Also, it probably didn't look good that she shared powers with Annie, a known traitor. Her Plan A would be to continue tracking Annie, and hopefully her capture would win back the Survey Corps's trust. Plan B would be more complicated, since it meant working with the Survey Corps and winning back their trust slowly.

And that was when she felt it. The horrid chakra of titans approaching their location with incredible speed. How was that possible? Titans weren't supposed to be able to move at night! There was barely any moonlight too!

Sakura ran back inside the castle and went halfway done the stairs. "Everyone! Everyone go back up to the roof! Titans are going to surround us!"

Titans were coming, and nobody would be able to fight them.

* * *

><p><strong>Since this is an AU of the Naruto world, the Ice Release shouldn't be too outrageous, considering I also hinted her two main chakra natures and when mixed they make Ice. However, I feel the need to warrant this change by saying that Sakura's enemies only get stronger, and the tides are already against her. I always lamented how much weaker she was compared to her teammates. And sure, <em>Naruto <em>was a lot about Naruto and Sasuke's friendship, and thus having both of them be OP was necessary. But even Kakashi was OP at times, meanwhile Sakura could only punch, heal people, regenerate, and cry.**

**For a main female lead, her powers left a lot to be desired. So I used fanfiction powers to change that.**

**As for the other weirdness of the chapter, all will be explained, completely, no worries. I didn't pull that out of my ass, even if it seems like it.**

**The Clash of Titans Arc has a really weird timeline that's hard to explain, so I'll post the timeline once all the spoilers are done with. To the manga-readers, bear with me through Levi's POV. I add my twists here and there, but I have to put some of the SnK plot to make some sense of what's going on.**

**Like always, thank you so much to everyone who reviews, favorites, follows, reads and loves this story! That's all of the fuel I need. I started this story 2 years ago and I would've never known it would turn out like this. So thanks again for your continued support!**

**I love you all and see you next chapter!**


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